HJ"!
PAOK THItKH
THE EVENING HERALD, KLAMATH FALLS, OREGON
MONDAY, JUNK 7, I
I H I MM I f f f f ! I'M 1 1 1 IM fti JSMfr
I POT POURR1 f
QM
8
lly J.ONi: UTAH
&
$
V
P
rtSW.S33OTEETfcfflaE ffllara
p i PUB all
&
31
I
1
I
v
1
mamgs
Should You Lose
An Heirloom
BY FIRE OR THEFT, YOU
MAY NEVER REPLACE IT.
TAKE NECESSARY PRE
CAUTION NOW. RENT A
SAFE DEPOSIT BOX IN
OUR FIRE AND BURGLAR
PROOF VAULT. THE COST
IS ONLY $3.00 AND UP PER
YEAR.
HrstSwe &SawgsBank
Klamath Falls. Oregon
fi
asEgytea&s
Wii wero cctniriK over from Eng
liitnl somn tlmi! ago, ntid Urn steward
on. tliu vessel wiih rjulto a physician.
Did you wiy "How can a steward Im
itii(o n physician?" Well hii at
(imil'iil ull tliu berths, that'll how.
I.o no Hlnr wont Into tho local post
offlrn tlio other ilny nml foil nil n re
turned letter In li In box. Not under-
Mt ii tn In k It Iki wont to Dclzi'll ami
nuked why tlio letter hail not Icon
Kotit. "Oh, It'll too hoary," returned
I lio worthy prntinuntor. "It needs
another Htarnti." "Well' hut w rn
piled, "that will maku It heavier )ot"
unit wn aro ntlll unahlo to see Junt
why a lottor thut In already too hoary
iii'imIh another stamp on It.
Perhaps our friend from the antl'
iloluvlnn period can tell u.
A friend of our remarked some
tlmi! qro thut men who bad anything
In their headH generally found plenty
to do with their band. That'a so.
Wo Raw a tramp the other day who
evidently had something In bin bead
both bla hands were busy.
A friend of nun remarked no me
who la continually nagging at her
about her grammar. Tho well-intentioned
mother baa evidently over
done It, however, for after the taut
attack of the "flu" that thu Lone Star
had, nlie approached him on the
atrcct and said, "Did you enjoy much
puln when you were III?"
ioi ooi.sn ni'
IIII.O, Ulnnd of Hawaii. T II ,
May: I. (Ily Mull.) I'ol, thu itaplo
Hawaiian food noun will advance In
price, nrordlnic to Hupervlsar Jumci
Ako of tlio North Komi district Aku
raid that thu enforcement of board
of health regulation! roruntly pro-
uiulguted would put a number of I'ol
factories out' of business Added to
thin, mild Ako, tho tar crop, from the
rootn of which I'ol la made, la abort,
owing to tlio dry season and other
ca linen.
A CluwMed Ad will aell It.
uite it
i nit rlicnuc skpmx battut
I ' -TTr?5
m$ti&A .
n Ur.f
ff-w jtBSaKly.
Hut any: wouldn't t ti tit be' a glori
ous world If people only lived up to
whut'a on their tombatonvaT
Dynamite Mulono. the California
Oregon Tower company' iipeed pellet
gut whut wan coming to him tcduy.
Ilu wan driving thut Chevrolet of bla
from Kcno at about 6C mllei an hour
when off came It hind leg. Fortun
ately, the speed pellet wa uninjured,
ultbuuKh If In) had been, Lone
Star would not hat a shed any team.
iih lio bad occasion to rldo behind him
not long ago. And believe me folks,
nnv man that can ride more than onu
block behind Major Malonu and live
to tell thu atory, Ih no mo mun.
We bnvu been culled upon to rlak
our life more than onru, but wa have
never beforu been bamboozled Into
luklng what was supposed to be a
pleasure ride, and then live In perfect
terror nil the way out and all the wuy
buck.
Now is Your Chance to
Cut Down Your
Expenses x'
The Central Hotel
will rent a limited number of rooms to permanent guests. These
rooms are furnished with the best beds that money can buy. They
are clean, tidy and well ventilated, and will be kept so.'
There will be hot and cold water, tub and shower baths.
Restaurant and barber shop will be in the building and everything
will be done to make it comfortable, convenient and homey.
The Hotel is now open for business. The restaurant and
barber shop will be ready early in June.
The purpose back of this hotel is to furnish to the workingman
of Klamath Falls a place where he can live decently and cleanly
and at a price that will be within his reach. The owners of this
hotel feel that they have done this.
J. J. KELLER, Manager
It'a all right Dynamite, you'll get
hours 101110 day mark my words.
inn it think Lono Star Is a dead one If
letter like that one was should get
past him.
D
O you know what "Jj.xtOC" meant when It comes to
nelectinfc n starting battery for your car?
It means )u arc ydting a ciuitci prtxluct luckul up by
over a (feneration of ccialitfd opcrtcncc It mews )iu arr
i;rilinj! ilic hunt tli.n the lirycr maker ufituMgc batteries in
the wurl.l can irinltirc. It meant ton arc vetting tlw it.irt
ing batter n'iif in rery detail; i'ontinct.on, pcrioriii.incc,
Jurabilit).
Know tlic f.icM-come in nml examine the "JtXlDC" fur
yotil car
.
LOW'S GARAGE
JUIH) IX) W. Proprietor
KXI'KHT AUTO IlKPAIIUMJ
GOODRICH TlltKH KXIUK UATTKIUKrl
Ladlea' Ileat Room
OS Mala Htrt
Phone W-J
Klamath FaJU, Ore.
Hut say, folks do you know tho
reusou thu sun nuvcr setH on tho llrlt
lh empire? No? Well, It'a because
Cod Almighty cannot trust an Kng
llshmnn In tho dark that's why.
At the opening of the new danco
pavilion the ether evening, one of tho
new dunces Introduced was Tho
African Uullop. And thereby hangs
n tale.
Now we'll tell you something clso
about that letter, nnd its wonderful
spelling, Wo only pointed out to you
two mistakes, when, as a matter of
fact there were three. Our antedi
luvian friend of the pro-Christian era,
spelt "christian" as follows; "chrls
tIEn." How do you like that old
top? That waa a typographical error
too no doubt Suppose you saw that
one too, didn't you?
Sometlmo aomewhero In the
dark and misty recesses of the past
Drothor Parker was obsessed with the
Idea that ha waa a natural horn actor.
In fact, to hear him talk one would
think that Sidney Drew took lessons
Did you say "How can a stoward bo
niontha ot futile endeavor, Parker
finally succeeded In setting on the
stage, and, strangle to say, waa given
the leading role In a play called "The
African Gallop." Aak him about It.
PRECAUTION
IS A
PREVENTIVE
gpilOHK who HUffi-r iiuiMt from period of Inflation or
ilef bit Ion nro thoxo who 'will Hteadlly refuNO to iviognUo
thut condltloiiH DO ('liuiiu,e,iiiil who uro therefore never
prepared,
OunilUlonn Imvo not benn jiorinid. Would YOU bo
prepared ahould u cIiaiiko romu?
A First National BANK ACCOUNT
u always preparedness.
i
First National BankI
KLAMATH FA1X5 OKCOON a jjl
Incidentally, It would have done
you good to ace Parker strutting
'round that danco ball the other
night. Talk about oasy money It'a
tho first easy money Parker ovor saw
and It Hort of went to his head. I.ono
Star went up to his little bar, as In
duyH of yoro, to get himself u littlo
drink. Usually Purker and myself
uro pretty good friends nnd It was !
easy to soo that tliu ynunt; mun was
not normal by n long shot. Do you
know what bo did?
In this second letter, this bird says
that two ot his virtues are being
able to spell correctly, and gram
mar. Well that might bo so, but
so far, all tho evidence U to the con
trary, and until we are given some
proof ot these virtues, we are bound
to look upon them as very negative
vlrtuea.
W IN N
HN
E
SSLflCK
OF
SOLICITORS
And then, it these are two of his
vlrtuea .we wonder how many more
he has. Tou remember the old atory
ot "self-praise."
Just one more suggestion before
wo dismiss our virtuous friend from
pur mind, and consign his anonymous
'communication to tho waste paper
basket. It Is this: Oat anothor
brand ot envolopes beforo addressing
nuy more communications to Lotto
Star tho first ones gave you away.
moiuii vicnmv
Woll, listen so flustered was this
young man thut. when wo naked him
for nn Ico croiim Co no, ho hundod us
out it corkscrew. So you can ttunglno
Hint ho was besldo himself some.
iiowover, tlio novelty ot oasy
money soon dies nway aud In time
Parker will descend to uurth again.
We recolvod another spasm from
our friend tho "Knocker" tho other
day, but wo woro too wlso for him.
He can't get any froo advertising
hero. But what excuse do you think
he made for bia bum spelling, Listen.
He aaye that he knew It waa -rotten
spelling, but that bo didn't want to
correct It with ink, as that would
have ilven him away. Evidently be
HONOLULU, T. II.. May 19, (Ily
Mull). That China may hnvo suf
fered n political reverse, but that sho
gained a grout moritt victory by tho
withdrawal ot her ponco dolegates
from tho Versailles coaforenco, wan
tho statement niado hero rccontly by
Charles It. Crane, now minister to
China, who spent a day In Honolulu
en routo to Peking,
maVila pnospKitous
MANILA, P. I., April 15, (Dy
Mall). The assessed value ot all
real estate In the city ot Manila la
1118,000,000, the city assessor today
having completed his revaluation (or
the year 1920. This la an Increase or
34 per cent over the assess! valua
tion (or the preceding year.
NEW YORK. Juno 6. Combina
tion ot the work ot tho vocational
training- board and the war risk In
suranco bureau waa recommended In
a report made public today by a sub
committee on war risk Insurance of
the, Republican national committee's
advisory committee on policies and
platform. The report has been adopt
od by the executive committee ot the
advisory committee and will be sub
mitted to the platform committee of
the Republican convention to be held
In Chicago.
The sub-committee o( which Fred
erick Prellnghuyaen of New Jersey.
Is chairman, reviewed criticisms ot
the service rendered to soldiers by
tho war risk insuranco bureau and
aald that the bureau had not been
equal to the task fo keeping In touch
with tho soldlors after they were de
mobilized, with the result that 7
per cent of their Insurance lapsed.
Tho committee recommended that
work affecting tho former service)
men should be co-ordinated 'and the
responsibility placed under one active.,
directing head; that the former sol
diers holding converted policies be
permitted to name any beneficiary
and use their insurance as collateral;
that policies be issued promptly and
branch offices established to collect
premiums through local postofflcea.
The committee reported that over
100,000 men have converted their
insurance for over 1400,000,000 nnd
that many more must do so but that
"no policies have yet been Issued al
though policies were approved over
one year ago and this had led to con
siderable friction." The committee)
stated that the "weakness In govern
ment Insurance" lav; In the (act that
Insurance could not be aucceatrnl
without active solicitation and the
government waa in no position to do
this. It stated that there has been
"very little delay" In settling claims
of soldiers aggregating over 1,000,-
000,000 of Insurance.
Kansas City school teachers refus
ed to Join the Federation ot Labor.
MONUMENTS
Believe no man who
stretches the truth See
ing is believing. Our
thousands of patrons
are our best endorse
ment. See our splendid
line now on display.
St?'.Pytyy: B
Klamath Falls Marble & Granite Works
GEORGE D. GRIZZLE, Prop.
iHP,-"vli
v'