Image provided by: Yamhill County Historical Society; McMinnville, OR
About Yamhill reporter. (McMinnville, Or.) 1883-1886 | View Entire Issue (June 21, 1883)
’ transaction within the statue of limita
or the woman won’t take it back. She
WIT AND HUMOR-
j tions. The reported failure of th
don’t want no bald goat. Well, they
the grub that makes the
Canadian authorities to make an ex-
can run the baby and goat to suit
A Nrw*y Letter on the (ìo«MÌp of the Na
The Bad Boy Di latex oil the Attribute* of
tional Capital from our Special Corre«- I ception in their custom regulations,
Thirty-*ix Per*on* Killed. Towns Kn-
and allow the fugitive American the New Baby and help* hi* Pa rapture a I have gone into business. Don't you tirely Devastated Amid Scene* of In-
How to beat your grocer on eggs—
(■oat. for Family L'*e.
| whisky to be exported to the Dornin
smell anything that would lead you dexcrlbable Panic and De*truction.
ion, causes no surprise among the
to surmise that I had gone into busi
Dublin ought to be a good place
U ASHINGTOM, A pbil 25, 1883. I lx»st posted as to the real attitude of
“Well, how is the baby,” asked the ness? No drugstore this time,” and
The Pacific Coast is well taken care this Government.
grocery man of the bad boy, as he the boy got up and put his thumbs I
It is hard for owers to paddle their
if here by its representatives, and
®xam*nRtion of star route cases came into the grocery smelling very in the armholes of his vest, and looked Pacific Coast, is beyond a doubt the own
hegreat interests of California and ,,l.Wv“FnJ“ent struck a bonanza “horsey,” and sat down on the chair proud.
most favored locality in the world.
Checkers is looked upon as a
Jregon are receiving attention from piled up evidence against the con with the back gone, and looked very thing, except the faint odor of a horse Throughout the year we bask in a square game.
he efforts of the Immigration Bureau . spirators by the testimony of one of tired.
Man’s genius is often developed by
blanket. What you gone into any climate uniform and delightful in
o make known the splendid oppor their moat trusted lieutenants. Dor
“Oh, darn the baby. Everybody way,” and the grocery man put the temperature, and the devastation by woman’s inspiration.
■unities and resources of the Pacific ??y’H d?nials became farcical as Mr. asks me about the baby as though it wrapping paper under the counter, the elements to which other sections
Everybody takes an interest in
, L w
, a . besieged j with
... the after
and ,)y read
M e are yet
tl)„ affidavit was mine. I don’t pay no attention and put the red chalk in his pocket, are subjected, are entirely unknown young men of principle.
so the boy couldn't write any sign to to the Pacific Coast. To be sure, we
Society regards the purse-and-all
now of W inter, while you, who are but which he acknowledged he knew to the darn thing, except to notice hang up outside.
appearances of strangers.
(asking in the balmy climate of Cali-1 nothing about. He hesitated, stam the foolishness going on around the
“You hit it the first time. I have
Peter Cooper was a self-made man,
ornia, are envied for the perpetual1 n®er®^ ,anA struggled to make his house. Say. I guess that baby will accepted a situation of teller in a shock of earthquake, but that is a and
he lasted a long time.
but the prosecu-
Ipring and Summer weather you ^
blessing in disguise, for it convinces
That man will get rich who can
i on to grow up to be a fire engine. The searched around for the barrel of cut
j mankind of the uncertainty of a life keep his owin’ door closed.
renewed perjuries. Such a witness nurse coupled the baby on to a sec sugar, which had been removed.
The President huving chosen his has seldom been interrogated, and his
What is a house without a baby ?
“Teller in a livery stable! Well, i built upon an insecure foundation.
ew Postmaster General and left a face was blanched with fear during
The terrible cyclone which recently Well, comparatively quiet.
igion of expectant men still remain- the entire cross examination.
teller in a livery stable,” and the devastated a large proportion of the
When there are men about women
ig in the hands of their friends, has
Bob Ingersoll, Jerry Wilson and get up steam and pretty soon the
man looked pleased, and Mississippi Valley is not uncommon are not so apt to kiss each other.
t last gone on his long-deferred Mr. Davidgq, counsel for the defense, milk began to disappear, just like the grocery
pointed the boy to a barrel of seven to that locality, and the residents
Let a man take his own life and he
oliday, and is now whizzing away found it difficult to control themselves water does when a tire engine couples cent
lyouslv to the Florida coast.
while one of their own crowd was
have been for years in dread of these will not know what to do with it.
No changes in the interior of the being terribly scored, and sought ‘Old Number Two.’ I am ‘Number
“What's in a name?” An inordi
tornadoes that always bring death
«’bite House are contemplated this every opportunity to interrupt the One,’ and if pa had a hook and ladder in a livery stable? It is the same as and destruction. Our security on the nate desire to get in the newspaper.
sar, and beyond a thorough clean examination. They could not, how truck and a hose cart, and a fire the harnesses, oil the buggies, and Pacific Coast will be appreciated
Don’t you think the bride is fool-
g nothing will be done to it this ever, break the force of Mr. Merrick’s gong he would imagine he was chief curry off the horses, and when a man when the following description of ish that she never marries the best
ason. The repairs and itnprove- questions, and when he finished with
in to hire a horse I have to go the Wesson) cyclone in Mississippi is man?
ents made last year were so thor- the witness it was because the mate- the baby kicks on this milk wagon comes
It is a bad school that teaches the
the saloon and tell the livery I I read:
igh and complete that there is rial was exhausted. * * * * * milk, and howls like a dog that’s got man. That
’s what a teller is. I like | Lowering clouds indicated its ap young idea how to shoot with a toy
lost. The doctor told pa the best
ithing that it is really essential to
thing he could do was to get a goat, the teller part of it, but greasing utes before by,deep rumbling sounds pistol.
ive altered or renewed this season,
A COLORED MAN IN LUCK-
German musicians are always
but pa said since we ’nishiated him harnesses is a little too rich for my
new portrait of ex-President Grant
An illustration of how easily for into the Masons with the goat he blood, but the livery man says if I —winds in dwellings shaking violent afraid the French pitch will stick to
is lately been placed in the East
to it I will be governor some ly—and many thought it au earth them.
lorn of the White House. It is a tunes are sometimes made in the wouldn’t have a goat around no how. stick
’cause most all the great men quake. The thunder and lightning
When the short man begged the
rge, life-size representation of the West: A colored man jumped off the The doc told pa the other kind of a day,
have begun life taking care of horses. were terrific. Fences were torn tall woman for a kiss, she stooped to
pillar hero, and was begun by Le platform of the smoker, and Sheriff goat, I think it was a Samantha goat It
all depends on my girl whether I
ere and finished by Bierstadt. A John C. Hope, who chanced to be he said, wouldn’t kick with it’s head, stick
or not. If she likes the smell dred yards away. East of the rail
rtrait of President Arthur coni standing near by, recognized him as and pa seut me up into the Polack of horses I shall be a statesman, but road the damage was light, but in
Bring up a child in the way he
meed by him has had the fiual Jim Ferguson, an old fashioned settlement to see if I couldn’t borrow if she objects to it, and sticks up her the west portion of the town the de should go, and he will be more apt to
a milk goat for a few weeks. I got a nose, I shall not yearn to be governor, struction was awful in its character. get there.
idles given to it by Andrews, and row Gauge.
woman to lend us her goat till the
now pronounced the finest portrait
One peach orchard struck was lined
Tight trousers are going out of
baby got big enough to chew beef, at the expense of my girl. It beats with large numbers of houses, in fashion, and it is time to abandon
the President yet seen. The por-
all, don’t it, that wimmen settle every
lit of Gen. Grant has not been had thought Ferguson dead, not for a dollar a week, and paid a dollar great question. Everybody does which the operatives of the Missis tight men.
in advance, and pa went up in the
rchased for the White House, having seen him for several years.
The reason the world gives us
“How d’ye. Mars John? How do evening to help me get the' goat. everything to please wimmen, and sippi Mills are domiciled. The
hough the line of Presidents is
if they kick on anything that settles greatest destruction occurred and daily bread, is because the world
presented on canvas up to his man.
the groans of the wounded beneath
ever see. There was two goats so it. But I must go and umpire that the ruins were appalling. The doughs us.
“Where have you been, Jim?”
When a horse-car conductor begins
near alike you couldn’t tell which 1
Recent dispatches have brought
and the goat. Say, can’t you come | dwellings at Atom’s pine forest, just to knock down he soon becomes a
“Out’n New Mexico.”
) news from Turkey that the Sultan
and see the baby? ’Taint bigger
goat was the chum of our goat, but over
iposes to recall Aristarchi Bey,
“Speculatin’ in mines and runnin’ it belonged to a, Nirish woman. We than a small satchel,” and the boy The work of removing the dead and
Somebody has braced up enough to
extricating the wounded from the
o has been his Minister to the a barber shop.”
got a bed cord hitched around the waited till the grocery man went to ruins soon began. Calvin Reed, liv kick a Philadelphia reporter. Proba
ited States for the past nine years,
“Making any money ?”
Irish goat, and that goat didn’t recog out and put up a sign written on a ing in the vicinity, died from excite bly to wake him up.
tl send a stranger in his place,
This was the question that the
Solid joys and double leaded mis
e change of envoys will not effect proud descendent of Ham was wait nize the lease, and when we tried to shingle with white chalk, '‘yellow sand ment.
jerk it along it rared right up, and wanted for maple sugar."- —[Peck's
Many women and children were eries, are the fat takes hanging on
i amicable relations existing be- ing for.
killed or wounded, twenty or thirty the copy hook of life.
jen the two countries, and has no
"Little bit.” said he, pulling out a don’t know what there is about a goat Sun.
dwelbngs were blown down and a
iat significance except to Washing- handful of $20 gold pieces and ex that
Beecher says "Honesty is depart
it get so spunky, but that
large number of people are missing. ing from our land.” Tilton knows
i society, in which the swarthy hibiting them with evident self goat makes
istarchi has long been a chief orna satisfaction. At the same time Fer pa from the first. If there were any
who gave it a black eye.
Some English crank is getting out
nt. A proposition is being consid- guson went into one of his inside places on pa’s manly form that the a phonographic edition of standard limbs is estimated by the physicians
There is always business for those
at seventy-five. The wounded were •who advertise. Those who do not
d at the Treasury Department to coat, pockets and brought out a well- goat did net explore, with its head, novels.
removed as fast as possible to houses have gone out of business.
le the gold certificates in distinct- filled book. He opened it and dis pa don’t know where the places are.
Some of the New York critics think
sets. The recent trouble about played drafts amounting to $11,000. O, it lammed him. and when I luffed very poorly of Howell’s new novel, j j which escaped injury. A violent
They have steamboat excursions
I rain fell for more than an hour after
certificates in Chipago has demon- “I’se done pretty well out there, Mars pa got mad. I told him every man .‘A Woman’s Reason.”
in Florida where it costs four dollars
itedsome of the inconveniences of John,” said Ferguson, breaking out ought to furnish his own goats, when
to go and six to come back.
present system. It was proposed into a big laugh, "and I’se gwine ho had a baby, and I let go of the M’me Nilsson was said to have been out and coffins made for them. The
A fool is proud of having had soft
first to send to Chicago small down to Independence to see the
and started off, and pa said he the Vanderbilt ball.
for the wounded, but many, it is ening of the brain. The disease is a
lonrinations, but no requisition has folks. Then I’ll go back to New rope
knew how it was. I wanted him to get The new spring bonnets are very feared will die.
certificate that he has a brain.
n asked for for that purpose. It Mexico to see ’bout my property.”
killed. It wasn’t that, but I saw the beautiful. Crushed strawberry is the
At Beauregard the destruction to
Wiggins will know about his
i thought at first at the Depart- | Kansas City Times.
Irish woman that owned the goat fashionable color for bonnets and life and property is said to be simply weather profits when the accounts of
it that the trouble with Boston
coming around the corner of the ribbons.
I indescrible. Among the killed in sales of his almanacs are all in.
I Chicago was that the denomina-
A LOVING CAT.
house with a cistern pole. Just as
i of their certificates was too large.
Oliver Wendell Holmes will be Wesson are Mrs. Causly and two
The “manly art of self defense” is
Cats are said to surpass dogs in
children, several children of J. E.
h scheme for the repair of the
gate the goat got cross ways of the given a banquet by his New Y’ork Gibson, one of whom was found so called to distinguish it from the
lble has not been adopted how- .
friends and admirers April 24th.
brutes, who take to it naturally.
friends. But the following touching gate, and pa yanked, and doubled
under a chimney’, two per The engagement ring—a select
Ex Senator Davis and bride will re crushed
the goat right up, and I thought he
.ecent dispatches convey the im also capable of a strong love for per had broke the goat’s neck, and the turn to Bloomington from California unrecognizable, and several others circle of mothers and spinsters w’lio
ision that Commissioner Loring, s >ns:
woman thought so too, for she jabbed some time in June.
whose names could not be obtained. make matches between young people.
he Agricultural Department, had
pa with the cistern pole just below
Absinthe lias a powerful rival in A little boy was found in the woods
Isn’t it a little paradoxical to speak
up his opposition to the watch family, became extremely attached the belt, and she tried to get a hold Paris in the form of an Algerian bev several hundred yards away unhurt. of a man as a crank when he is so set
providing against the spread of to the eldest child a boy. They on pa’s hair, but be had her there. erage known as Amer Pieon.
Wesson, except in the locality men in his mind that you can't turn him’
Bro pneumonia and kindred dis were playmates, and puss bore with No woman can get the advantage of German geographers propose to tioned,
suffered little except the de According to the Critic, there is a
is of cattle. The Commissioner, exemplary patience, and without any pa that way ’cause ma has tried it christen a portion of the Northern struction
of fences and trees.
man in Washington whose arrogance
o the time of the inception of the unkind resistance, all those occasional Well, pa explained it to the woman, Ocean the Nordenskjold Sea.
The scene was appalling, The is big enough to burst a gas company.
. was a most earnest and enthu- instances of maltreatment which the and she let pa off if he would pay her
is literally a mass of • ruins
Senator Thurman’s daughter, Mrs. t town
A National Board of Health with
tic advocate and supporter of it, playmates of children are almost two dollars for damages to her goat,
it is with difficulty one can ride out a quorum and without a hundred
was desirous that a means might sure to receive. This continued a and he paid it, and then we took the Cowles, of Cleveland, will build a through,
dollars, is a sorrowful
irovided whereby the diseases of long time.
nanny goat, and it went right along 1 large summer residence at Newport. across the road. Not a house of any thousand
Senator Dawes's daughter is de
le might be examined into, and
Atfieugth the child was attacked
is standing in the place.
Vermont sap must run very fast to
spreading prevented, through a with smallpox. In the first days the of a baby that will drink goat’s milk. voted to literature, and is soon to take character
a position on a Massachusetts journal. Timbers are scattered for miles catch up with the new maple sugar
aer analysis and knowledge of the cat
quitted his bedside. As
around, even out in the country two the grocers have bad on hand for t wo
¡sets. The proposed publications the never
Jules Verne has another new book and a half miles At Beauregard years.
disease progressed it became in a spoiled cocoanut. The baby
le Census Bureau are finally being necessary to remove her, and even to hasn't done any thing but blat since out called “Godfrey Morgan, a Cali twenty
three were killed and ninety
The New Yorkers who saw “The
le up into volumes for printing, lock her up. The child died. The the nurse coupled it onto the goat fornia Mystery.”
wounded. Twenty-seven houses in Play” didn’t applaud Judas, simply
time one i.<to contain the popula cat was liberated, and instantly flew hydrant. I had to take all my play
Dr. Oliver Wendell Holmes will Wesson were destroyed. Beauregard
statistics, volume two is to refer to the apartment where she hoped to things out of the basement to keep write a “Life of Emerson” for the is entirely swept away. The suffer because they thought he sold out too
manufactures, volume three to tind her playmate, but the body was the goat from eating them. I ’ guess
American Men of Letter scries.
ing is very’ great. The town of Till
culture, volume four takes in the not there.
Capt. Pickles wanted to call his
the milk will taste of powder and
Harper & Bros, have in press and man was destroyed and several were
■ial reports on petroleum and
Then she ran about the bouse uutil singed hair now. The goat got to will soon publish a “Life of James killed and wounded. The Vicksburg ferryboat Good Rule, because it will
ding stone, volume five will in at last she got into the room where eating some Boman candies me and i Buchanan,” by Mr. George Ticknor and Meridian Railroad town of Law work both ways, but he was over
le ship building and the report on the dead lx>y lay. Here she lay down my chum had laid away in the coal Curtis.
rence suffered terribly. Reports ruled in the matter.
kii and printing and publishing, in silent melancholy, and had (again bin, and chewed them around the
The Rev. E. E. Hale says that the from other places and from the coun Senator Tabor says he will estab
the volume on manufactures will to be locked up. As soon as the furnace, and the powder leaked out
try show the storm was wide spread lish a paper of his own in Denver. It
prise all the information gathered child was interred she disappeared, and a coal fell out of the furnace on rumor of his visit to Mexico probably and destructive.
The telegraph is the only way an experimental man
live to power, the factory system, but about a fortnight after she re the hearth, and you’d a dide to see grew out of the fact that he is writ wires were blown down for miles.
can sound his own praises.
cotton, wool, chemicals and iron turned to the well-known apartment pa and the hired girl and the goat.
The spring season is the time when
steel, and a series of monographs (piite emaciated.
You we pa can’t milk nothing but a
A dude seems to be a helpless sort County Treasurers who can’t tell
he various special agents The
Still she would not take any nour
that $25,000 went to, go on a
me on agriculture, besides the ishment, but ran away with dismal girl to milk the goat, and they were have taken up their abode in New of young exquisite, requiring an where
sties, will embody special reports cries. At length, compelled by hun- just hunting around the basement for Y’ork, and snub them on all occasions. army of liveried servants to care for visit to relatives in Canada.
It is well enough to travel for one’s
him. The Knickerbocker Club of
1 flour and milling, cereals, to- ger, she made her appearance every the goat, with a tin cup. when the
THE PANAMA CANAL.
New Y ork is composed of dudes, who health; but it has been noticed that
o culture and meat production, day about dinner-time, then left the fireworks went off. Well, there was
a man is much healthier if his sal
lese five volumes will comprise house.
balls of green, and red, and blue tire,
According to the officers of the pride themselves upon admitting only ary
is stopped when absent.
such to membership. A good story
it half the census publications,
No one knew where she was the and spilled powder blazed up, and the Panama Canal Company in New York is being circulated among the va
“Yes,” said the landlord, pointing
are expected to be issued within 1 rest of the time, till one day she was Ífoat just looked astonished, and City, the work on the Panama Canal
present calendar year. The sup followed to the burial-ground, and ooked on as though it was sorry so is going on satisfactorily. There are rious clubs at their expense, to the to his block of new houses, “they’re
lental report of the Jeannette found by the grave of her favorite.
much good fodder was spoiled, but now alxmt 6,(MM) men at work. More effect that a stray cat recently ob- all full, ’cept the one at the end.
tained entrance ,to their club rooms That’s last, but not leased.”
t of inquiry, which has been re
So great was the attachment of the when its hair began to burn, the goat than half the line is now under con
‘d and approved by Secretary cat to her deceased little friend, that gave one snort and went between pa tract, and the canal company is also from the roof and eat three dudes
There is always something left for
idler, states that the court has for five years that is. until the re and the hired girl like it was shot at work upon other parts. One of before the hungry tabby was dis- the small boy. Before the water
hided the examination of the moval of the parents to another neigh out of a cannon, and it knocked pa the contracts embraces alxmt seven covered and driven off by a squad of melon season comes to take him off,
This be can play with the deadly toy pis
nette survivors who recently re I borhood—there was every reason to over a wash boiler into the coal bin. miles on the Atlantic side, and anoth their high toned hirelings,
cd from Siberia, and that, after believe that, excepting in the great and the hired girl in amongst the er alxmt the same on the Pacific side. danger attends those who are too ut tol.
ire consideration of all the evi est seventy of Winter, she went out kindling wood, and she crossed her Both these contracts are with Ameri terly utter.
It is not absolutely necessary for
» adduced, the courts see no and passed every night close by the self and repeated the catekism, and can companies. The work of excava
man to sow his wild oats, lie
Cornelius Vanderbilt, of New York, can always
in to change or modify the con grave.
the goat jumped up on top of the tion on both sides will soon be under
find some baldheaded old
<H>* rejxirted February II, 1883.
brick furnace, ami they couldn’t get way. Three dredges are now at work, who was worth his millions, began life gentleman ready to sow them for
le Interior Department has al
General Sherman recently had it down. I heard the celebration and and the largest dredge in the world as a brakeman. He owned his own him.
y sent out seventeen special some shirts made at a furnishing store went down and took pa by the pants is now at sea on the wav to the isth boat when eighteen and navigated it
Sheep killing dogs in Virginia aro
its. twelve of whom are new in Washington, and the cutter, a few and pulled him out of the coal bin. mus. A number of miles of side himself. Honest, enterprising and
fintees, to investigate fraudulent weeks later, met the General with a and he said he would surrender, and track have lx>en built connecting with industrious, he rose to be one of the unusually busy. The poor man can
les of the public land, and will friend, walking down the avenue plead guilty of being the biggest fool the Panama Kailroad, leading out to richest men in this country, and was always afford to keep dugs so long as
rich neighbor can afford to keep
ont others from time to time as The General remembered the face, in Milwaukee. 1 pulled the kindling places selected for the deposit of ex universally respected for his good his
service may require’,
of but could not locate him, and the cut wixxl off the hired girl, and then she cavated rock, earth, etc. It has been qualities.
Everything is done in royal stylo
1 agents have reported a number ter greeted him with: "Gotxl morn got mad. and said she would milk found necessary to construct a new
'andulent entries, but it is too | I ing. General. How are yon to-day ?" tlifti goat or die. O, that girl has got harbor at the outlet of the canal into
The body heat of birds is greater in Queen Victoria’s household. John
to exjs'ct full reports from all [ The General stopped, shook hands, sand. She used to work in the glass the Atlantic, about three miles fiom than that of any other class of ani Brown’s younger brother succeeds
lent The promised indictment 1 and the cutter perceiving that the fa ‘torv. Well, sir. it was a sight the harbor at Aspinwall, so as to fur mals, ranging from 106 to 112 de John as confidential servant to the
ator Kellogg still fails to be General’s mind needed refreshing, worth two shillings admission, to see nish protection to vessels connected gress Fahrenheit. Among the mam Queen.
Red. It is reported that some said quietly: "Made your shirts.’ that hired girl get up on a step ladder with and navigating the canal. This malia it is from 95 to 105 degrees,
It is said 200 years ago the Indians
i controversy has oocurred within "Oh! I bog pardon,” said the General to milk that goat on top of the fur is nearly completed. Such American varying in adult man from 98 to 100 indulged in Turkish baths. Yes. it
Grand Juryroom Itetwecu the I quickly, and turning to the gentle nace, with pa sitting on a barrel of machinery as has been sent to the degrees.
must have been all of 200 years ago.
•» ••*’ •
■rnment counsel. Mr. Ker. and man with whom he was walking he potatoes, bossing the job. They are isthmus has given great satisfaction.
To judge from the one we saw last,
jurors. The presentiment was [said: "All! Colonel---- , allow me to going to fix a gang plank to get the Besides machinery, many supplies
Never before have French flowers it might have been 1000 years ago.
' after a good deal of pressure. introduce yor. to my friend. Major goat down off the furnace. The baby have been and will be sent from this attained such perfection as this sea An official and volantr>er organist
* meantime a rebellion is said Schurz!”
kicked on the milk last night. I' country. Already in the purchase of son. The flowers of silk come in ex of a church was asked to assist in
ve occurred. The press of the
guess besides tasting of powder and Panama Railroad stuck, and for other quisite colors and tints, and it takes passing around the plate. He re
Man believes himself always great burnt hair, the milk was too warm on purpose*. there have Iveen nearly #25. a Philadelphia lawyer to tell them plied that he didn't object to playing
try paid its respects to a present
wherein a date was deliberately er than he is, and is esteemed less account of the furnace. I’a has got OOOdMK) in gold paid by the canal com from the real gems of the conserva the organ, but did object to being
5pd in order to bring the alleged than he is worth.
to grow a new lot of hair on that goat pany to citizens of the United States. tory.