IIOOD RIVER GLACIER, THURSDAY. JANUARY 1, 1014
THE WORD HELL
0
Bo Nott FdUet
To Send a New Ye&eta
. Postal op Calterilap
We Have Then
Keir Cass
Smith BIocR
Reliable DugSit
A Gsnius.
"Wtiat kinder feller U Pete PooIIt-
-Brlfht dollar, patient, an a
bard worker"
"WhP, he can't told a Job fer niore'n
t week, ail' I dear hi family ain't got
enough to live rfh."
Pho; ttiat may le. but nat' that
got to do with II? You ee that ineer
achaum pipe o" hin'ii? Colored it hlui
aelf. You tli.it there hobilr
watch rliain lie wears? Braided It blui
elf. Notice Hie peach Hone ttiarm
banpiu' to it? Carved It biiuelf, an'
it took two mouths to flulh. See tUat
houu' Uawg he' Pete trained
tlmt dawg to lo everything a circus
dawg kin ilo. K.ver hear IVte play n
the mouth hn au' accompany him
self on the clttar? Taught himself.
Ever Pee his liandwritin ? Jest like
eopiHTplate. all shaded an" t1urihed.
an he kin make a awaii wit hunt tafcin"
his pen fr'iu the paer. I'ele may not
keep a Job or feed his fani'ly. hut he n
a peiilus-tbafa what he M'-devo
kind I'lain Dealer.
me
Si.-i.
Read This P
Before you buy. We ask you to call and inspect our
complete line of New and Second Hand Furniture,
Stoves and Ranges. Everything in house furnishings
We will take your old furniture or stoves
in exchange for NEW GOODS.
0. P. DABNEY & SON
Guaranteed Cheapest Outfitter
Agents for
Charter Oak Stoves
and Ranges
PH0NK 8281
Cob. Fourth and State StS: ''
Land For Sale
1 have about 1,000 acres of No.; l Apple Land,
most of it under ditch at prices rangiDg from $60
per acre up. In tracts from ten acres up.
: J. R. STEELE :MMd
Hood River - - - Oregon
4T
Can't Eacap Him.
On a recent examination paper In
chics wan this quextlon: "If the pj evi
dent, vice president and nil the meui-
tier of the cabinet should die, who
would officiate?"
Robert, a boy of twelve, thought for
some tluve. trying In vSln'to recall who
came next In succession. At last a
hnppy Inspiration came to hlin, and he
answered, "The undertaker!"-Ohl'iipo
HallyNewg.
children
Frankness.!
'ITow well behaved your
are." said the minister's wife.
"They are perfectly lovely children.
added the mlnlHter.- '
The 'parents smiled proudly, and np
sHike little Agnes:
Ta said. If we didn't ueiiave ne a
knock our Mocks off, didn t you, pa .'
.-Pittsburgh. I Mspntch.
Prtssnct of Mind.
Tolonel Ch1v ("Ituffulo Hill") once
old the following story of one of his
comrades of the plains know u as iiil
Hill:
"A uiau who nursed a gniU-e against
Wild Hill swore to kill him. lie Mood
concealed In a doorway, si. -pped out
and confronted Hill as the latter ass.
ed and leveled a pistol at Ins head.
"'I've got you now, Wild Hill, he
said, 'and I'm going to kid .m, hut
I'll give you one minute to pray!'
"Well said Hill with au easy
smile, 'it does look like the jig's up:-
"Suddenly Hill peered over the mail's
shoulder and waved a deprecatory
hand.
"Hon't hit him, AnAyT he said.
"The man wheeled to protect bint-
self from the supposed enemy in his
rear. He gazed into empty space.
There was no Andy nor any one else
behind him. and before he could turn
round again Wild Hill had killed hlni.'
Little Book That Centaina
Startling Information.
A little book telling at only Or
rents, postpaid. Is baring a Try wide
circulation running up Into the mil
lions. It contains some very startling
Information respecting the aSanlng of
the word Hell. It claims to demon
strate, both from the Hebrew and the
ireek ( oar Bible, that Hell Is NOT
a place of eternal torment, bnt merely
not her untne tbr the TOMB, the
UUAYK, the STATE OK DEATH. U
affects to show that man was not re
deemed from a far-off place 4 eternal
torture, but quotes the Scriptures prov-
ng that be was HEDEKMED from the
GHAVK at the cost of hla Redeemers
IKK and that the Scriptural Hope,
both for the Church and the World.
s a resurrection hope based upon the
death and resurrection of Jesus. The
took Is certainly worth the reading.
The Information It furnishes Is cer
tainly valuable, far beyond Its trifling
cost. Order It at ouce from the Bible
and Tract Society. IT nicks Street.
Brooklyn, N. Y.
Wonderful lough Remedy.
Dr. KruVa New Discovery is kifown
everywhere as the remedy which will
surelKstop a. cough or cold. i. i
son of Elison.Tenn. writes: "Dr. King s
New 1'iecoverv is the most woiiucritii
cough, cold and throat and lung medi
cine I eer sold in my store. It can't be
beat. It sells without any trouble at
all. It needs no guarantee' This is
true, because Dr. King's JS'eW Discovery
will relieve the most obstinate of coughs
Lung troubles quickly helped by its use
Y'ou should keep a bottle in the bouse
at ail times for all the members of the
family, fiue and 1.00. All druggistsor
by mail. II. K. Buckleu & (Jo , 1'hiU
delphia or fit. Louis.
19
We Wish You A
Prosperous New Year
. -
The Best You Ever Had
Resolve to Buy Your Meats of Us
And We Know We'll Both Be Glad
HOOD RIVER MARKET
A "Friend" of Salesgirls.
Tills Is what I call my perpetual
shopping ticket."
- "Why do you call it thntr
"Oh, It's ' something I take along
when I hare no money to spe:id. It's
a sample of goods that nobody In town
can uifttch." Washington Herald.
all
. Doss She Dock Him?
,. "His wife Is a business woman,
right."
' 'What makes you say that?"
' "She's lnstulled a time clock In the
ball, and he has to pujich It when he
goes out .nights and when he gets
back." Los Angeles Times.
Tha Wild Boar.
The wild boar Is a most courageous
animal. The element of In- k counts
for a great deal In pig sticking, as in
most other forms of siort, 'id it often
happens that the foremost sportsiuiii
who by dint of hard riding or tliunlo
to the fastest horse has come up with
the quarry Is deprived of the coveted
honor of "tlrst spear" by a sudden
"jink" or turn of the pig. The hoar,
in spite of ids clumsy appearance, is
not only possessed of a great turn of
speed, but is extraordinarily active. He
will turn and twist like a hare, putting
every obstacle in the shape of bushes,
rocks, water, etc., between himself
and his pursuers, but uli the time mak
lug for the nearest patch of jungle and
safety. The pace after a pig Is faster
than the best of runs with hounds, but
Is sooner over.
THR SF.WAKD l Portlunil n mont
I Dmutilnl lioiel. Now, miMlern nd
I cli'tiHiitly appointed. I.nrife coriinr
' lotiby. lAH-aled at lOtb and Alder
BIh., opKMlte Olds, Wortman and
K I n ic Hit-Hi department lor and
In tlie tiran ol tne mail and llif
Ire dlntrirt.
Rates, $1 and up
Bin iiieetn all trains. AIho"W" car
ruim trom deimt direct lo Hotel
htward. W. M. Seward, Prop.
DC
3 C
WE HAVE JUST RECEIVED A. FRESH SUPPLY OF
Nitrate of Soda, Muriate of Potash
AND ALL KINDS OF FERTILIZERS
COME TG US DIRECT FOR
W00D.FIBERED HOUSE PLASTER
CEMENT AND LUC
AS WE UNLOAD DIRECT FROM THE CARS
ST RANAHAN & CLARK
Hood River, Oregon
Ms StoRweh Troubles Kcr
I Mr, Dyspeptic, would you not like to
feel that your stomach troubles were
Over, that you could eat any kind of food
you desired. without injarv? That may
seem so unlikely to you that you do not
even hope for an ending of your trouble,
but permit us to assure you mat, h is
not althogether impossible. If others
Can be cured permantely and thousands
have been, why not you? John It. Bar
ker of Battle Creek, Mich., Is one of
tiieui. lio says, "I was troubled with
heartburn, indigestion, and liver cum-
ilaint until I ut-etl Chamberlain's Tab
lis, then my trouble was over." Sold
by all druggists.
.'' Declines the Old Excuse.
; "Haw you. heard about Vlzzard's
latest play?"
"Yes. They say It's revolting."
; "It is. But give Vlzzard credit for
one thing."
; "What's that?"
"He flrnily refuses to say there's any
.'moral purpose In It." Cleveland Plalu
Dealer.
gn Ji
1
Sto
all kln$$
m
We have storage space for
of goods in a concrete butltjia
Our Tranfer Wagons Will Move
Anything . '
Complete Transter Service
Transfer & Livery Co.
Phone 4111
A Word of Caution.
I nenry Yullerby A f tali we's uarole
eIl hab chicken foh dinnah eberj
q"ay, honey.
: Melluda Johnson-Oh, yo' deary! But
X wouldn't ask yo' to run no seen risks
foh man sake. Puck.
The annual 'stockholders meeting of
the Farmers Irrigating? Company will
be bibld Saturdav. January 10, lull, at
10 A. M. at the Commercial Club Hull
fe t&te parpDSB of electing seven Direc
tors to KDrvooone wear, and for the pur
pose of transacting such other business
as unoy 1G3.14? coma Itsfore the meeting.
Jtolinauent stau&holders will not be per-
itteil to vote.
By orddV of Direc.toft.
jl M. B.NICKELPEX, Sec.
Canned Musio In Scotia.
Early in tlie last century an old For
farshlro lady Installed In the bedroom
corridor of her castle au automatic
organ. It was her delight of a mom
lug to wake tier guests with Its strains.
But It was not the delight; of one of
them, Miss Sophia Johnstone of Hilton,
to lie no awakened, hnfl she sfltd so. '
"Ye dinna like the uuislo? Ye
hliouliliia say that, Sophy," said the
hostess. "Y'll no' win to hcitven an'
ye dlnna take pleasure in music. It's
to he nil music there, ye know."
'"Deed," said the Incorrigible one.
"an' if heaven's a place wl" utild wives
phiyln' on hand organs at 0 o'clock in
the uiornin' It's no the place I tk' It
for. nor yet the place I want to be In."
New Witness.
4 11111 1 1 H-M1! 11 I 1 1 111 1 H"H
Goto
B. B's. Dairy Lunch :
FOR SHORT ORDERS
All kinds of sandwiches and
homemade cakes and pies a
specialty. Good coffee and
soups.
B. B. SMITH, Prop.
Supervised by Mrs. Smith
(ink Ml. upp. Kraut Hardware Slore
HW-l'I-M-HI III 1 111 H-H-l
Handel In Dublin.
There was a period of his life in
which llauilel, the famous composer,
retired from London iu a fit of dis
gust. He went to Dublin, and It was
there-ln the Dublin Music hall that
his great masterpiece. "The Messiah,"
was produced. "The lierformance
writes D. A. Chart, "wus for the bene
fit of Mercer's hospital. In order to
provide room for a large audience
ladies were requested to lay aside their
hoops nnd gentlemen their swords. By
this means an audience of 700 was
crowded Into the spuce, and the con
cert realized 400."
Oblong Houses.
Square and oblong houses are cheap
er to build than odd shaped structures
The oblong house Is cheaper than the
square. Timbers come In cortaln
lengths, and the house that Is long and
narrow takes less timber than one that
is qunre that Is to say, the material
cuts to better advantage In the oblong
house than in the square house; also
lei s labor Is Involved In the making
Pictorial Review.
Wasted Sarcasm.
Indignant Wife 1 wonder what you
would have done If you had lived when
men were first compelled to earn their
bread by the sweat of their brows
Indolent Husband I should have
started a little notion store and sold
hnndkerchlefs.-Chlcogo Tribune.
Flattering Epitaphs.
Charles Lamb, when a little boy
walking in a churchyard with his
sister and reading the epitaphs, said
to her. "Mury. where are all the
naughty people burled?"
Lanft back may come from over-w?rk
cold spttled in the muscles of the back,
or from disease. In the two former
cases the tight remedy is Ballard's Snow
Liniment. It ehohld be rnbbed in thor
oughly over the affected part, the relief
will be prompt and satisfactory. Price
25c, 50c, and $1.00 per bottle. Sold by
Chas. K. Clarke.
Bilious?
On of Ayer's Pills at bedtime hut
one. Acts on Q Irver- Gently laxative.
Sugar-coated. All vegetable.
. Sold for 60 years.
Ask Your Doctor.
Kill Catarrh Germ
Use Booth's Wyomet
,Try the sure and most effective way
ioreacn trie raw, tenner tniiamea mu
cous membrance infested with catarrl
germs nee Hyomei. You breathe it
no stomach dosing.
If vou suffer from raising of mucus
frequent sneezing, hut-ky voice, dis
charge from the n se, droppings in the
throat or anv other symptom aof catarrh
breathe the gernwlejtroying air of
Hyomei. It acts directly on tl inflam
ed membranes, destroying the disease
germs in the no3, throat and lungs and
giving quick ana pennant reltet.ormon
ev refunded bv Keir & Cas.
The complete outfit, including pocket
inhaler and bottle of liquid, costs fl M,
Extra bottle of liquid, if later needed
50 cents.
Rub tier Stamp Inks and Pads at this
onlce, also itamps made to order.
KELLY BROS.
PHONE 4443
Hay, Grain, Mill Feed
Orchard SupfHtes
Warehouse on Railroad Street
just west of Vinegar Factory.
Agents for WOOD STAVE PIPE
WOOD and COAL
Slabs-Fir-Oak
Agency for Genuine
Rock Springs COAL
A. C. Lofts
PHONE. 3464
Real Estate
LOANS, RENTING, COLLECT
ING AND INSURANCE
A BpeclRlty of Clly Property, Residence
Lots, and Small Tracts Close lu, Kor
Bargalna call on or add rem
T. D. TWEEDY
Hood River
Home Phone 2372
New Schedule
Mount Hood Railroad
No. J
jy.
8 00.
8 OA.
8 1ft..
m
8 40.
9 Oh.
9 r.
20.
45.
10 10.
10 1JV.
10 40.
10 45.
Kllentlve 12:01 A. M.
Bunday. Kept, t),
I 'J 12
STATIONS
L,v. .
..Hood River Ar. .
. ,PoerdHle
..Hwitohlisck
..Van florn
Mohr
Odell
. . .Hntninil
...Hloucher
.. . Wtnans
i I)ee
.Trout t'rei-b
. WKd worth
. .c'Parkdle
I
..
Ml
..i
..2 10
. t 06
...2 on
..1 60
-.1
...i m
..1 30
..I IS
, 1 to
. 1 00
A. WILSON, Agent.
COTTAGE
HOSPITAL
o
Hood River's Medical
Institution
Open to the public for treat
ment of Medical and Surgi
cal cases.
RATES ON APPLICATION
Address
Cottage Hospital Assn.
HOOD RIVER, 0REQ0N.
9 14
is now with us and we expect it to be"
one of the most prosperous this community
has even known.
Hood River has profited by past experi
ence and is now on a more substantial basis
than ever before, conservative progress
safa and sane advancement will keep this
community where it belongs-in front.
Thanking our patrons for their support
and trusting that we shall continue to re
tain their confidence and good will by mer
iting it and with best wishes to all for
A Prosperous New Year
We are yours faithfully.
Blowers Hardware Co
The Firm That "MaKes Good"
Phone 1691
Oak and 1st Sts.
T. J. KINNAIRD
Groceries
Fresh Vegetables and Fruit in Season
Flour and Feed
Phone 2121
Hood River, Oregon
Do You Know
that awashiftg machine will only cost you three-fifths
of a cent an hour to operate?
The following table gives the cost of using var
ious apparatus on the 3 cent rate:
APPARATUS
20 candle-power Mazda lamp
Huditiut toiiHter
C'hntiiiK dish fl . . .
l)Uk Stove
Coffee percolator
fl lb. iron
H in. fan (full speed)
Hewing machine motor
Ice cream fn ezrr i
Washing machine motor
Luminous rnditor (hiiuiII)
Heating pail
Tubular air beater (mnall)
Tea kettle
Ozonator
Dometdic buffing and grinding motor
Radiant grill
Cost
0. 07.rc
1. H .
1.8
l.H
1.35
1 (15
0.075
0 1(15
1.2
O.ti
1 5
0.1
3.(1
0.5
0.045
0.1 o5
1-8
Hydro-Electric Company
The Purity Dairy Co.
Yours for prompt service and
Good Milk
mOS. D. CALKINS
UPPER VALLEY NOTICE
List Your Places for Special Attention With
WARD IRELAND CORNELL
Upper Vallor Ral Estate-Insurance
Improved and Unlmprofd Orchard Land
Phsns OdU 337
Hood River Connection
Guy Y. Edwarda Co.
U. C. M. RANCH
Parkdale
Upper Hood River Valley