I pOORHOUSEn jpAUCE I
CHAPTEU XI.
In the old brown school bouse, over
shadowed by apple trees '"I sheltered,
on the west by i long, steep hill, where"
the acorns and wild (trapes grew, Mary
Howard taught littto Hock of twenty
five, coaxing some, urging otberi and
teaching them all by her kind wordi and
winsome ways to love her a they had
never before loved an Instructor.
When first ahe waa proposed at a
teacher In Kiee Corner, Widow Perkins,
and a few others who hud no children to
send, held up their hands in aniaieiueut,
wondering "what the world waa comiu'
to, and if the committeeman, Mr. Knight,
'posed they waa goln' to be rid over
rnmrlmhod hr a town pauper; but she
couldn't get Mtiffcut, for the orthodox
minister wouldn't give her one; and If
he did, the t'nitarlan minister wouldn't'."
Accordingly, when it was known that
the ordeal had been passed and that
Mary had in her possession a piece of pa
per about three Inches square, authoris
ing her to teach a common district school,
Hi ix worthy conclave concluded that
"either everybody had lost their senses
or else .Miss Mason, who was present at
the examination, had sat by and whis
pered In her ear the answers to all hard
questions."
"In all my born days I never seen any
thing like It," said the widow, as she
distributed her green tea, sweetened with
brown sugar, to a party of ladles, which
she was entertaining. "But you'll see,
Bhe won't keep her time mor'n half out
Sally Ann, pass them nutenkes. No
body's goin' to send their children to
pauper. There's Miss Bradley says she'll
take her'u out the first time they get
licked. Have some more sass, Miss
Dodge. I want It eat up, for I believe
It's a-workin' but I telled her that
warn't the trouble, Mary' too softly to
hurt miskeeter. And so young, too.
It's' government she'll lack in. If any
body'll have piece of this dried apple
pie, I'll cut It.'
Fortunately, Mary knew nothing of
Mrs. Perkins displeasure, and never
dreamed thnt any feeling existed toward
her save that of perfect friendship. Since
we last saw her, she had grown Into
fine, healthy looking girl. Her face nd
figure were rouud and full, and her com
plexion, though still rather pale, was
clear as marble, contrasting well with
her dark-brown hair and eyes, which no
longer seemed unnaturally large. Still,
she was not beautiful, it is true, and yet
Billy was not far from right when he
called her the finest looking girl In Chico
pee: anil it was for this reason, perhaps,
that Mrs. Campbell watched with jeal
ousy.
Every possible pains had been taken
with Ellas education. The best teach-
ers had been hired to Instruct her, and
she was now at a fashionable seminary,
but still Bhe did not possess one-half the
ease and gracefulness of manner which
seemed natural to her sister. The two
girls had seen but little of each other;
and oftentimes when Ella met her sister
she merely acknowledged her presence
by a nod or a simple "how d ye do?
When she heard that Mary was to be
teacher she said "she was glad, for It
was more respectable than going Into a
factory or working out." Mrs. Campbell,
too, felt in duty bound to express" her
pleasure, adding that "she hoped Mary
would give satisfaction, but 'twas ex
tremely doubtful, she was so young, and
possessed of so little dignity!"
Unfortunately Widow Perkins' red cot
tage stood directly opposite the school
house; and as the widow belonged to that
stiming few who always "wash the
breakfast dishes and make the beds be
fore anyone Is up in the house," she had
ample leisure to watch and report on
he proceedings of the new teacher. Now,
Mrs. Perkins' clock was like Its mis
tress, always half an hour in advance
of the true time, and Mary had scarcely
taught a week ere Mr. Knight, "the com
mitteeman," was duly hailed in the street
and told that the "schoolmarra wanted
lookin' to, for she didn't begin no morn
ln' till half-past nine, nor no afternoon
till half-past one! Besides that," she
added, "I think she gives 'em too long a
play spell. Anyways, seems ef some on
'em was out o' doors the hull time."
Mr. Knight had too much good sense
to heed the widow's complaints, and he
merely replied: "I'm glad ou't. Five
hours is enough to keep little shavers
cramped up in the house glad on't."
The widow, thus foiled in her attempts
at making disturbance, finally gave up
the strife, contenting herself with quis
ling the older girls, and asking them if
Mary could do all the hard sums in arith
metic, or whether she took them home
for Mrs. Mason to solve!
In spite, however, of these little an
noyances, Mary was contented and hap
py. She knew that her pupils loved her,
and that the greater part of the district
Were satisfied, so she greeted the widow
with her pleasantest smile, and by al
ways being particularly polite, finally
overcame her prejudice to a considerable
extent.
One afternoon about the middle of
July, as Mrs. Terkins was seated by her
front window engaged in "stitching
shoes," a very common employment in
some parts of New England, her atten
tion was suddenly diverted by a tall,
stylish-looking young man, who, driving
his handsome horse and buggy under
the shadow of the apple trees, alighted
and entered into conversation with a
group of little girls who were taking their
usual recess. Mrs, Perkins' curiosity was
aroused, and Sully Ann was called to
see who the stranger was. But for a
wonder Sally Ann didn't know, though
she "guessed the hoss was one of the
East Chicopee livery."
"He's talkin' to Liddy Knight," said
she, at the same time holding back the
curtain and stepping aside so as not to
be visible herself.
"Try if you can hear what he's sayin',"
whispered Mrs. Perkins; but a class of
boys in the school house just then struck
Into the multiplication table, thus effec
tually drowning anything which Sally
Ann might otherwise have heard.
"I know them children will split their
throats. Can't they hold up a minute,'
exclaimed Mrs. Perkins, greatly annoyed
at being thus prevented from overhearing
a conversation the nuttue of which Bhe
could not even guess.
The stranger was at that moment smil
ingly saying: "Tell me more about her.
Does she ever scold, or has she too
pretty a mouth for that?"
"No, she never scolds," said Delia
Frost, "and she's got the nicest white
teerh, and I guess she knows it, too, for
she shows them a great deal."
"She's real white, too,' rejoined Lydia
Knight, "though pa says she used to be
jailer as saffron."
Ber there was gentle rap upon the
window, and the girls, starting off, ex
claimed: "There, we must go In."
"May I go, too?" asked the stranger,
following them to the door. "Introduce
mc as Mr. Stuart."
Lydla had never Introduced anybody In
her life, and, following her companions to
her aeat, she left Mr. S'linrt standing in
the doorway. With her usual politeness,
Mary came forward and received the
stranger, who gave his name as Mr. Stu
art, aaylng "he felt much Interested in
common schools, and therefore had ven
tured to call."
Offering the seat of honor, Mary re
sumed her usual duties, occasionally
casting a look of curiosity at the stranger.
whose eyes seemed constantly upon ner.
It was rather warm that day, and when
Marv returned from her dinner Widow
Perkins was greatly shocked at seeing
her attired In a light pink muslin dress,
the short sleeves of which showed to good
advantage her round, white arms. A nar
row velvet ribbon confined by small
brooch and a black silk apron, completed
her toilet, with the exception of a tiny
locket, which was suspended from her
neck by a slender gold chain. This last
ornament Immediately riveted Mr. Stu
art's attention, and from some strango
cause ent the color quickly to his face.
After a time, as if to ascertain whether
It were really a locket or a watch, he ask
ed "if Miss Howard could tell him the
hour?"
"Certainly, sir," said she, and stepping
to the desk and consulting a silver time
piece about the size of a. dining plate,
she told him that It was half-past three.
When school was out Mr. Stuart, who
seemed In no haste whatever, entered in
to a lively discussion with Mary concern
ing schools and books, adroitly managing
to draw her out upon all the leading top
ics of the day. At Inst the conversation
turned upon flowers; and, when Mary
chanced to mention Mrs. Mason's beauti
ful garden he instantly expressed a great
desire to see it, and finally offered to ac
company Mary home, provided she had
no objections. She could not, of course,
say no, and the Widow Perkins came
very near letting her buttermilk biscuit
burn to a cinder when she saw the young
man walking down the road with Mary.
Arrived at Mrs. Mason's, the stranger
managed to make himself so agreeable
that Mrs. Mason invited him to stay to
tea. Whoever he was, he seemed to un
derstand exactly how to find out what
ever he wished to know; and before tea
was over be had learned of Mary's In
tention to attend the academy In Wil
braham the next autumn.
Finally he said good-night, leaving
Mary and Mrs. Mason to wonder the
one what he came there for, and the oth
er whether he would ever come again.
The widow, too, wondered and fidgeted
as the sun went down behind the long
hill.
"It beats all nater what's kept him so
long," said she, when he at last appear
ed and, unfastening his horse, drove off
at a furious rate; "but If I live I'll know
all about It to-morrow;" and with thl
consolatory remark she returned to the
best room and for the .emaiuder of the
evening devoted herself to the entertain
ment of Uncle Jim and his wife, Aunt
Dolly.
That evening Mr. Knight, who had
been to the postofflce, called at Mrs. Ma
son s, bringing witn Dim a letter wnich
bore the Boston postmark. Passing it to
Mary, he winked at Mrs. Mason, saying,
"I kinder guess how all this writiu
works will end; but hain't there been t
young chap to see the school?"
"Yes; how did you know it?" returned
Mrs. Mason, wuile Alary nuslieu more
deeply than she did when Billy's letter
was handed her.
"Why, you see," answered Mr. Knight,
"I was about at the foot of the Blanch-
ard hill, when I see a buggy coming like
Jehu. Just as it got agin me it kinder
slackened and the fore wheel ran off
smack and scissors."
"Was he hurt?" quickly asked Mary.
"Not a bit on't," said Mr. Knight, "but
he was scared some, I guess. I got out.
and helped him, and when he heard I's
from Itiee Corner he said he'd been into
school. Then he asked forty-'leven ques
tions about you, and jest as I was settin'
you up high, who should come a-canterin'
up, with their long-tailed gowns, and hats
like men, but Ella Campbell and a great
white-eyed pucker, that came homo with
her from school? Either, Ella's horse was
scary or she did It a purpose, for the
minit she got near it began to rare, and
she would have fell off if that man hndu'
catched It by the bit and held her on
with t'other hand. I alius was the most
sanguinary of men, and I was buildin
castles about him and our little school
marm, when Ella came along, and I giu
it up, for I see that he was took, and
she did look handsome, with her curls a
flyin' Wall, as I wasn't of no more use,
I whipped up old Charlotte and come on.'
"When did Ella return?" asked Mary
who had not before heard of her sister
arrival.
"I don't know," said Mr. Knight. "The
first I see of her was cuttin' through
the streets on the dead run; but I ninstn'
stay here gabbin', so good-night, Miss
Mason good-night, Mary hope you've
got good news in that ar letter."
The moment he was gone Mary ran up
to her room to read her letter, from
which we give the following extract
"You must have forgotten George More
land, or you would have' mentioned him
to me. I like him very much, Indeed, and
yet I could not help feeling a little jealou
when he manifested so much Interest in
you. Sometimes, Mary, I think that for
a brother, I am getting too selfish, and I
do not wish anyone to like you except
myself, but I surely need not feel so to
ward George, the best friend I have in
Boston. He is very kind, lending me
books, and has even offered to use his in
fluence in getting me a situation In one
of the best law offices in the city."
After reading this letter Mary sot for
a long time thinking of George Morelan
of the time when she first knew him
of all that William Bender had been to
her since and wondering, as girls some
times will, which she liked the best. Billy
unquestionably had the strongest claim
to her love, but could he have known
how much satisfaction she felt in think
ing that George still remembered and felt
interested in her he would have bad some
reason for fearing, as he occasionally did,
that she would never be to hiin aught
save a sister.
CHAPTER XII.
The summer was drawing to a close,
and with it Mary's school. She had suc
ceeded In giving satisfaction to the en
tire district Mr. Knight, with whom
Mary was a great favorite, offered her
the school for the coming winter, but she
had decided upon attending school her-
.. . 1 41- J .1 1 r, ! r. Ma ftf.
aeir, anil aner raiinu; u.-.
fer, told him of her Intention.
"But where' the money comliig from?
saiil he.
Mary laughingly asked him how many
bags of shoes he supposed Bhe had stitch
ed durlug the last two years.
"More'u two hundred, I'll bet," said he.
"Not quite as many as thnt." answered
Mary; "but still I have managed to earn
my clothes and thirty dollars besides; and
tils, together with my school wages, will
pay for one term and part of another."
"Well, go ahead," returned Mr. Knight.
"I'd help you If I could. Go ahead; and
who knows but you'll one day be th
presldent'a wife."
When Widow Perkins heard that Mary
was going away to school she forgot to
put auy yeast In the bread which she wa
making, and, bidding Sally Ann "watch It
until it rix," she posted off to Mrs. Ma
son's to Inquire the particulars, reckoning
up as she went along how much fourteen
weeks' wages would come to at nine shil
lings per week.
But with all her quizzing and "pump-
ing.
as Judith called it, sne was un-
able to ascertain anything of Importance,
and, mentally styling Mrs. Mason, Mary,
Judith and all "great gumpheads," she
returned home and relieved Sally Ann
from her watch over unleavened bread.
Both Mrs. Mason and Mary laughed
heartily at the widow's curiosity, though,
as Mary said, "It was no laughing mat
ter where the money was to come from
which she needed for her books and cloth
ing." Everything which Mrs. Mason could
do for her she did, and even Judith, who
was never famous for generosity, brought
In one Saturday morning half-worn
merino, which she thought "mebby could
e turned and sponged, and mad into
;methln' decent," adding, In an under-
one, that sue a nail it out ainn on ui
clothes boss for ntore'n two hours!"
A few days afterward Jenny Lincoln
came galloping up to the school house
oor, declaring her Intention of staying
ut il school was out. and having a good
time.
I hear you are going to Wilbraham,
said she, "but I want you to go to Mount
lolyoke. We are going, a whole lot of
ns that is, if we can pass examination.
Hose isn't pleased with the Idea, but I
m. I think twill be fun to wash po
tatoes and scour knives. I don t believe
thnt mother would ever hava sent ns
there if it were not that Ida Selden la
going. Her rattier ana ner Aimi Mar
tha used to be schoolmates with Miss
yon, and they have always Intended
it Ida should graduate at Mount Hoi-
oke. Now, why can t you go, too
"I wish I could," said Mary, "but I
can't. I haven't money enough, and thers
Is no one to give It to me."
It wouldn't hurt Mrs. Campbell to
help you a little," returned Jenny. "Why,
last term Ella spent almost enough for
candies and gutta percha toys to pay the
expense of half a year's schooling at
Mount I lolyoke. Its too bad that she
should have everything and you nothing."
(To be continued.)
Cures Victims of Druirs.
A church union now exists In New
York for the most remarkable purpose
on record, ng avowed object is to
cure the victims of the morphine and
other drug habits and a most Impres
sive list of well-known clergymen have
registered themselves In support of the
scheme, which Is conducted by Dr. W.
N. KlchJe.
The plans of Dr. Richie's work and
the means by which be hopes to make
It effectual are to be made public as
soon as possible. AH that Is withheld
from the public Is the elements of the
mysterious compound, which Is, Dr.
Itichle alleges, an absolutely Infallible
panacea.
Men and women who have sunk to
the lowest levels of degradation have,
It Is claimed, by the use of this cure
become perfectly regenerated. Physi
cians of established reputation private
ly Indorse the cure, aud the testimonials
appear so convincing that the clergy
men who have formed a union on the
strength of It feel absolutely sure of
Its efficacy.
Dr. Bichle says that he obtained the
cure from a friend of his, who lu turn
obtained It from a German savant. The
friend referred to, having once become
the slave of morphine and having but
5 cents left In the world, converted It
Into a fj-cent stamp to address a letter
to the German who had originated the
cure. The recipe came, was made use
of, and the man, when Dr. Ulchie knew
him, was enjoying an honored old age.
A committee has been formed to re
ceive donations for the cure of such pa
tients as are not able to pay.
How Bridget Spoiled Things.
Charlie and Mamie are not friends
any more, and Bridget Is to blame for
It all.
Charlie Is the promising scion of a
rroapect avenue home, while Mamie
Is the sweet young thing on Marshall
street for whom sundry florists' and
confectioners' bills have mounted up
to an alarming height lately. Bridget
Is tbe maid at Mamie's home, and as
Mamie Is a most bewildering young
person with a decidedly Indolent
streak, it happens very often that
Bridget Is Instructed to say she is not
at home when the cold facts are that
Mamie Is reclining luxuriously on the
library couch with the latest maga
zine and a box of fine bon bons.
The other evening Charlie thought
that he would surprise the young wom
an, and so called when she did not ex
pect him. Mamie had an unusually
fascinating novel, and was not dressed
for callers, therefore she Instructed
Bridget to say she had gone over on
the West Side. Biddy got through the
message all right. The Inconsiderate
young man, instead of going away,
asked:
"Can you tell me when she will re
turn?" She faltered, then lost her head com
pletely, and blurting out:
"Sure, an' I'll ask Miss Mamie,"
mshed down the hall, while a very
angry yet dignified young man
walked down the front steps to return
no more. Milwaukee Sentinel.
Tit for Tat
Slopay I want you to make another
suit for me.
Tailor (reluctantly) Yes?
Slopay Yes. Now, let me see some
thing In the way of a check.
Tailor All right, but suppose you do
the same for me. Philadelphia Press.
Could Not Be Repeated.
"I met Higglnbee and he stopped me
to tell me what his little boy said, but
I'll bet one thing."
"Huh! What's that?"
"I'll bet he didn't tell his boy what I
said." Indianapolis Press.
If Satan ever gets short of fuel he
ought to be able to use excuses.
SHARED HIS LEAP TO Dr.ATH.
Whits Klk Forced to Cbey Judgment
of the phoihon Indian.
White Elk. the sou of Standing Bear,
:he Shoshone chieftain, sat stolidly la
the grltn circle of Indians that sat
around the council fire. He st un
moved as each ludluu lu tutu thrust
his baud forward with the fingers out
spread and the thumb pointing down
ward. The lust Indian lu the circle
bad made tho sign. Standing Bear
arose und stood stiff and steru In the
red lights of the burning embers. Every
eye was upon hlui. White Elk sut
looking stolidly at him through half
loosed eyelids. Standing Bear thrust
his arm out at full length and slowly
spread bis fingers apart aud turned bis
thumb toward the earth. - A scream
came from a group of women standing
uear the chief's lodge. Then two old
suuaws led away a young Indian
woman who still sobbed In spite of the
storied stoicism of her race. The sen
twice of death had been passed on
White Elk. He slowly rose as his fa
ther turned toward him and extended
a niece of black wampum. He took It
and tucked It In his girdle, bowed slow
ly to the council, and strode away to
bis own tepee, where be Bat eaiinij
pufllng at bis pipe long after tbe comi-
:11 had broken up and Its inetnners nau
crr.no nnii.ti to their lodges. White
Elk sat alone In the silence of the night
lihtenlng to the rushing waters of the
Popoagle. It was the voice of bis exe
cutloner. Tbree days more and he was
to be cast from a high rock Into tbe
"Place of Punishment," the deep hole
In the mountains which swallowed up
the rushing Popoagle and carried It
omewhere deep down Into the bowels
of the earth.
Into this place White Elk was to be
thrown birause the Shoshones believed
that the person who disappeared Into
the depths along with the roaring wa
ters of the Topoagle died a death mora
dreadful than any other that could be
WHITE ELK'S
meted out to him. Because the Popo
agle drew Its victims so deeply down
Into the dark regions under the earth
that the soul could never escape and
tlnd its way to the happy bunting
ground of the tribe. White Elk was not
afraid to die. He bad met death fac
to face a dozen times, and had not
trembled. He had fought with the
Blnckfeet and the Sioux, and led his
warriors to victory on many a hard
fought field. He had fought hand to
hand with the murderous Apaches,
and never knew what It was to be
ufrald. But in spite of his seeming
Indifference he shivered as he heard
the hoarse roar of the Popoagle tum
bling riotously over the rocks and leap
ing down the precipice to disappear In
the dark depths below. He pictured
his soul fighting with the angry water
to regain the upper air that it might
nscend to the happy bunting ground in
the clouds. But he knew the Popoagle
would triumph. He was certain that
no soul could defeat the malevolent
spirit of the Topoagle. White Elk
could regard death with equanimity,
but he could not bear the thought of
an eternity spent battling with the
spirit of the waters while Laughing
Eyes waited for him in vain In the
happy hunting ground.
White Elk's head dropped forward
and he groaned. He heard a sound be
hind him and sprang to his feet.
Laughing Eyes stood beside him In the
moonlight. She motioned him with her
hand and he followed her out to the
cliff overlooking the deep crevice, down
which the Ponongle lost itself. On the
cliff the two sat In the moonlight
"You must not give yourself to the
spirit of the Popoagle," said the girl
"You can go away. I will go with
you. The Blackfeet have been your
enemies, but they love you, for you
are a mighty warrior. To them you
can go and they will make you a chief,
and I will go with you." White Elk
sut silent. Then he spoke: "I must
die because I did not put to death
Nazalla, the Blackfoot chief. I had my
spear at his throat. I might have kill
ed him. But years ago Nazalla spared
my life when as a boy I was bunting
alone In the forest. He gave me food
and water and showed me the way
bflck t0 niy own peoplei
I could not
kill him as he lav wounded. But the
Shoshones fear Nazalla. They think
that with him dead the Blackfeet
would never more triumph in battle.
I would rather die and disappear into
the under darkness forever." The girl
fell on her knees and entreated him.
White Elk softly stroked her hair. But
he only shook his head in reply to her
entreaties. Long the. two sat there
Then they arose and walked back to
the village, and White Elk left Laugh
ing Eyes at the door of ber father's
lodge. Three days passed away, and
the next morning Just before sunrise
all the Shoshones were gathered lu
view of the great rock that lifted Itself
above the deep sink hSle of the Popo-
agie. The medicine men of the tribe
swaying their bodies chanted a death
hymn.
As the first rays of the sun shone
down the valley and rested redly upon
the little group on the rock White Elk
stepped forward with a strong young
Indian on either side. He turned and
looked keenly back at the group of
women who stood about Laughing
Eyes. He gave a sign and the two
young Indians rested thejr hands on
ft C&& .
i fill
Ma shoulder. White Elk stood with
bis face lifted up for a moment to tbe
clouds. He cast hi eyes around and
took a last look at the woods and at
his people standing grim and silent In
the clefts of the rocks. Then be sprang
forward and shot, straight downward
from the top of the cliff. His body
turned hulf over in the air. Then It
struck with a splash In the roaring
water aud was drawn downward and
disappeared forever In tbe cavernous
depths of the "place of punishment."
The Indians stood looking downward
where tbe form of the young chief bad
disappeared. Then there was a cry
and all looked again toward the top of
the rock Just as they saw Laughing
UVea l.nrl Imraelf henilloilC doWUWBrd
toward the rushing water. She sank
from sight and her body,
too, was
drawn downward to the depths. White
Elk's soul would not have to escape
the spirit of Popoagle to meet that of
Laughing Eyes.
HAS VOLCANOES TO BURN.
Uncle Para lias a Choice Assortment
In the Philippine lalanda.
The United States Geological Survey
will publish before long some facts
about the volcanoes of the Philippine",
which anx'ar to be very Interesting.
One of them Is the most symmetrically
beautiful volcanic cone In the world,
being eveu more perfect than the fa
mous Fujiyama, the sacred mountain
of Japan. It Is llttUj less than 0,000
feet high, and the name of It Is Allmy.
Albay was an exceedingly active vol
cano during the last century, having
burst Into eruption at least twenty
five times since the year 1800. It broke
out only laRt year with renewed pin- j
tonic activity, and back In 1814 no
fewer than 1,200 lives were lost In con
sequence of one of Its bad spells, a vil
lage four miles from tbe crater lielng
tinder lava and ashes to such a depth
thnt the ridgepoles of the houses were
hidden.
Between Albay and Lnguna de Bay
" W a. ' vttU
LEAP TO DEATH.
are many extinct or dormnnt craters,
The magnificent cone of Bannjao, 7,38'-'
feet In height, Is visible from Manila
bay. Its crater, 700 feet deep, was oc
cupied by a lake up to lido, when a
vilolent eruption took place, bursting
out the southern side of the crater and
pouring out both water and Incandes
cent lava.
6n an Island lu the Lake of Boinbon
Is the remarkable Taal volcano, which
Is readily accessible from Manila. Its
central crater is oval in shape, a mile
and a quarter across the greatest di
ameter and has within Its rim two
lakes of hot water, one yellow and the
other green, and a small active cone
fifty feet In height, from which escape
steam and sulphurous gases. The
strange colors of the waters are due to
the nresence of chemicals evolved in
subterranean laboratories.
The greatest eruption of Taal took
place In 1754, wiping out four villages.
Apparently the volcanic ash lends won
derful fertility to the soil, and present
ly a new growth of bamboo and palms
appears where desolation had reigned.
Even the localities most seriously and
constantly threatened by volcanoes In
the Philippines are promptly repopu
lilted after every disaster, their fertil
lty, surpassingly beautiful situation
and healthfulness charming the people
into a prompt forgetfulness of past
disasters.
The worst volcanic disturbances on
record in the Philippines occurred Jan
4 1041. They seem to have centralized
at the southern end of Mindanao, where
there Is a formidable group of "flro
mountains," ns the natives call them.
Three outbursts took place on that day
In different portions of the archipelago.
accompanied by earthquakes which
were felt as far away as Cochin China
and Cambodia. A Spanish squadron
was off the south const of Mindanao,
and some of the ships were almost
overwhelmed by falling ashes. In
Luzon, In Union province, "tbree bills
and several villages were thrown Into
the air In fragments and utterly anni
hilated." New Y'ork Herald.
An Interesting Ceremony.
Every day an Interesting ceremony
takes place at Gibraltar. The town
and fortress lie at the end of a penin
sula, about a mile and a half long, the
mainland being Spanish territory. The
gate leading to Spain is, every evening,
locked at sunset, and every morning un
locked at sunrise. Each day a com
pany from one of the regiments per
forms one of these functions. In the
morning the company, fully otiicered,
with colors flying and accompanied by
4 band, marches to the commnudant's
house. The company comes to atten
tion, and the commandant bands out
the keys on a velvet cushion. These
are received by a captain's orderly, the
band strikes up, and the procession
marches to the gate, which Is unlocked
with great ceremony. In the evening
the same ceremony, in the reverse or
der, Is gone through. All suspicious
characters are put out of the town be
fore the gates are locked In the even
ing. What a terrible lot of time Is wasted
in the course a life time, In waiting
at table to be served with something
not fit to eat!
A hard working man looks disdain
fully at the man w ho has to take exercise.
HUMOR OP THE WEEK
STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Odd, Curious and Laughable Phases
of Human Nature Graphically Por
trayed by Eminent Word Artlata of
Our Own Day-A Uud.et of Fun.
"I wonder where the entrance to the
ubwuy In," said a lady standing on
Tremont street on her first visit to Bos
ton. "I don't know, I'm sure," replied the
ladv wild WHS W'ltll lief, "btlt let' gO
over here. Here a door wun a sigu
'exit' over It."--Siimervllle 'Journal.
A Guilty Conscience
"Yen. sir,' said tbe patient salesman,
"I've hIiowii vnu our entire stock of
gald and silver watch-chains."
"Well, they ain't the kind I want,
renlled the criitikv customer. "I don't
propose to buy what I don't want."
"Certainly not, sir. Perhaps you
want a steel one."
"What's that Jest you come out
here, nn' 1 11 (.how you If I want to
steal one!" Catholic Standard.
Wlae Old Merchant.
Old Merchant-Wbere Is your refer
ence?
Tommy Tucker (w ho wants a Job as
cilice boy) Here's one from my run-
dny school teacher, sir.
Old Merchant-We don't want you to
work on Sundays. Get me a reference
from some one who knows you on week
days.
Verely to He Pitied.
"What do voti think of the Chicago
nrnfi.KKfir who snvs he never kissed a
pretty glii?" said one young woman.
Oh. I don't stop to think," answerea
the other. "I have no time to listen to
other people's troubles."Washlngton
Star.
For All Caime.
Man loves to kick with might and main;
Sad sounds best fit his mouth.
He'll first complain about the rain
And then about the drouth.
Washington Star.
An Explanation.
Mrs. Brown My busbnnd never says
nnrthlns- to me aliout the way his
mother used to cook.
Mm Green That's something un
usual. I wonder why he doesn't?
Mr. Brown She used to keep a
boarding bouse. Chicago News.
I'nfortunate.
"Education may be a good thing,"
said the man with the stubby mus
tache, "but if my pnrents had not In
stilled in niy mind so great a reverence
for grammar I am almost sure I could
have been a poet." Indianapolis Press.
Ilia 'miglnatton.
Percollum What are you working at
so feverishly?
Snaeer I've cot an assignment to
write an article on "How to Be Happy
Though Moving." Chicago Tribune.
Typical Fire Kcaaen.
Guest What precautions have
you
here In case of lire?
Hotel Clerk We have fire escapes
from every floor. All you have to do
Is to make your way to one of them
and fall off. New York Weekly.
"Well, that don't effect our going In
'cause we can't swim."
The Liw'i Delay.
reasnnt After you ve let the case
drag along now for three years, you've
loht It for me!
Lawyer II m! That's what I get for
niy good nature I might have let It
drag along for three years more!
Heitere Welt.
Meant Just What Ke Said.
Pupil Where is Atoms?
Teacher You mean Athens, Johnnie.
It is in Greece.
Pupil No, I don't mean Athens. I
menu Atoms, the place people get
blown to In boiler explosions. Balti
more World.
Too Noiay.
Differ My wife Is subject to nervous
headaches; can't stand a bit of noise.
Buffer Too bad!
Biffer Yes; why, I even had to sell
"my new golf suit. Ohio State Journal.
Hia Urounda.
"And on what ground do you base
your application for divorce?" asked
the lawyer of Ills new client.
"Exertion, sah."
"lou mean desertion, I suppose
Your wife has left you, doubtless."
"No, sah, she hasn't left me, sah."
"Then you can't ask for a divorce on
the ground of desertion."
"I said exertion, sah. Dat's de ground
perzackly. She done exert herself con
tinually to make me mizzable, sah.
Put It on de ground ob exertion, sah."
Everybody Wanti It.
well, me ionuern raeinc corner
didn't last long. That shows how hard
it is to get a corner in railroads."
"Yes, and If you've noticed, it's next
to Impossible, replied the end seat
hog, "to get a corner in street cars."
Philadelphia Press.'
!
Ilia Fntnr Flat.
"John sayi he'll have Ms graduation
papers purty soon."
'What's be been a-larniu' uii
"Greek, an' Latin, ui' French, an'
German, an' so forth."
"An" whnt's he golu' to do atter he
comes clear?"
"Well ef he don't go to spllttlu' rails,
or farniln', I reckon he'll spend the rest
of his days a-wrltlu' of dialect! At
lanta Constitution.
Tha Afterrlno.
Husband -Thank heaven, houseelean-
lng Is over.
Wife-Yes, dear, but the pictures are
yet to be hung.-Ohlo Stute Journal.
Tha llramatlc Cruse.
Mr. Fijjit-Our friend Epicure has
gotten out a new cook Ixxik.
Mrs. njjlt-Tbat's nice; Is It going to
be dramatized? Ohio State Journal.
Not CompVtmcntary.
'Brlggs say his daughter, looks like
Mm. Ild you ever see her?"
'No, and I never want to see ber If
she looks like Brlggs."-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Tha First Question.
"I see that an Indiana court has de
cided that a passenger traveling on a
pass can recover damages for Injuries
due to carelessness-of the train em
ployes." "Yes, but ho wdo you get the pasr
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Mora A 'raid of Lotlna- tha Girl.
"Aren't you afraid to keep such a
pretty girl In your kitchen? You way
lose your husband."
"I guess you dou't know that the
present ratio Is something like fifty
husbands to one competent girl.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Hrlght Hoy.
Son (at his studies)-Papa, I wish I
had been Ixirn In the time of Charle
magne. Father-Why?
Son Then I wouldn't have had to
learn everything that has happened
since. Fllegende Blaetter.
His Mlatake.
Ethel-He telegraphed hi proposal
to her.
Maude And did she accept him?
Ethel No; she said that she had no
use for a man who would waste his
money on telegraph tolls Instead of
spending It for caramels. Somervllle
Journal.
MUgnlded Young Man.
Ned Does Arthur play golf an Sun
day?
Tom Well, he thinks he does. Som
ervllle Journal.
A Very Long; rermon.
MX
Bobby Say, pop, how much did you
put In the iollectlon plate?
His Tapa-Sh! A dime, Bobby.
Bobby That preacher Is certainly
giving you an awful lot for your money.
Ke p ni HI in.
Mr. Backward Well-er-yes, since
you ask me, I was thinking of cousultr
lug a fortune teller.
Miss Coy To find out when you will
ninrry, en I
Mr. Backward Why-er-yes. I
Miss Coy Why not ask me and save
the fortune-tellers fee toward the
price of the rlng?-rhlladelphla Press.
An Inversion.
"Does Mr. Bllllonson play golf?"
"No. He works at golf. When ho
wants a little real diversion he goes
Into the stock market." Washington
Star.
Her Ioic
Mr. Poore Will nothing Induce you
to marry?
Miss Wltte On the contrary. It Is
the nothing you have which Induces me
not to mnrry.
Her Mlaappreiienaion.
Mr. Crlmsonbeak. Well, I see that
Englishman has got bis Gainsborough
back, after twenty years.
Mrs. Crlmsonbeak I shouldn't think
his wife would care for It now; It's out
of style.
"Out nothing; a picture as valuable
as that Is never out of style."
"Oh, is it a picture? I thought all
along that the Gainsborough was a
hat!" Youkers Statesman.
Too Rich for Him.
Jinks (meeting Winks In light lunch
cafe) Hello! What are you doing
here?
Winks Getting my lunch, of course.
Jinks But I thought you were keep
ing a swell restaurant down town.
Winks So I am, but I wouldn't keep
It long If I ate there. It's too expen
sive. Philadelphia Press.
Errs of Insect.
Tbe collection, preservation and ex
amination of the eggs of insects will
afford Interesting recreation. Curtains,
carpets, floor-crevices, cushions, ftir
and woolen garments will serve as a
prolific hunting ground Indoors; while
out of doors the surface waters of
ponds and water-butts, the corpses of
birds, tbe skins of cattle, and tbe leaves
and branches of the shrubberies give
an abundance of material.
Among those insects whose eggs
make the most interesting microscopi
cal mounts may be noted the common
house-fly, the wasp, the tortoise-shell
and cabbage butterflies, the mottled
umber and the puss moths, the dragon
fly, and most of the parasites. The eggs
of these are all shapes, hexagonal, coni
cal, oval, spherical, and. are most richly
and harmoniously colored; while the
elaborately sculptured surfaces are
hardly excelled In the beauty of their
designs by the symmetry of the ciliat
ed, winged and fringed ornamentations
with which they are surrounded.
Polish usually exaggerates the re
flections of a fool , .