The Columbia register., February 03, 1905, Image 2

Topics of S
the Tbas I
Te proffer a small torn at a bribe It
an intuit
Swapping horses la one kind of a
stock exchange.
But why ahouldn't Luna show a
badly cracked bead?
Somehow one's plain duty Is usually
too plain to ba attractive.
Moat men would rather hart half a
loaf than no chanc to loaf.
It will take more than gold-loving
hearts to make the gulden age.
If a woman keeps her husband In
hot water he may retaliate bj soaking
her.
Some men are stupider than they
look snd some look stupider than they
are.
Kleptomania Is a disease for wblcb
the victims are always taking some
thing. No girl cares to have a man admit
that she Is the only girl he ever loved
platonlcally.
Inventor Tesla is making great
. promises a pa In. But occasionally Telsa
makes good. '
It's easier for a woman to lore a
roan than It Is for ber to agree with
another woman.
Many a young man doesn't propose
for the reason that he is afraid the
girl will say "yes."
Colonel Bryan refuses to discuss at
this time the prediction that, be will
be the csndidate of the Democrats In
190&. Modesty forbids.
The women who want to do away
with the typewriter girl hare started
a question that will be harder to de
cide than the canteen controversy.
Word comes from Constantinople
that Turkey bat arranged to borrow
115.000,000 from a foreign financial
group. The sultan must have a Mrs.
Chadwlck on his stall.
. A Brooklyn judge has handed down
an opinion that a man who dye his
balr may be considered weak-minded.
Some people will Insist that the Brook
lyn jurist Is too conservative.
Mariners assert that the gulf stream
Is flowing with an unusually swift cur
rent this year. Unless It Is doing mis
chief, however, the case does not ap
pear to.be one that calls for an In
junction. A German court has decided that
poker la a game of skill, cot chance,
and that a man who has played poker
cannot be said to hare gambled. The
presumption is that the court had not
only played poker Itself, but bad been
fairly successful In accumulating the
blue checks.
' One of those Interesting persons
who are given to statistics has figured
out that if all the Inhabitants of the
earth were divided Into families of
four there would be ample room for
them in Texas, and every family would
have a little farm consisting of more
than half an acre. Nevada, however,
could accommodate nearly half the in
habitants of the earth on the same lib
eral basis If you can imagine any
body wanting to settle down In Ne
vada. Vanderbilt horses now wear night
shirts made of fine linen. These pro
tect their coats from the blankets worn
art night In Paris the lap dogB are
provided with gum shoes to keep their
feet dry and in New York the auto
mobile shops sell sweaters for dogs,
, bo that Prince or Carlo may be saved
from catching pneumonia as he Is
whirred along In his owner's whizz
car. The only fashionable luxury the
"smart set" seem to deny its pets Is
divorce.
Wo Tlng-fang was among those who
were honored by the Dowager Em
press of China on her recent birthday.
The dowager, to show the high esteem
in which she holds him, has granted
him permission to ride on herseback
In the Forbidden City, a privilege en
joyed by only a few. As Mr. Wu,
when he was Chinese minister to this
country, preferred to ride about Wash
ington In an automobile, it Is doubtful
If he will often take advantage of his
new privilege.
There has always been a lower per
centage of divorces among men engag
ed In agricultural pursuits than in any
other calling, not excepting the clergy.
Soldiers, sailors and marines, on the
other extreme, show the highest aver
age of marriage Infelicity. Next
among the high averages comes the
hostlers, the actors, agricultural labor
ers, bartenders, servants and waiters,
musicians and teachers of music, pho
tographers, paper-hangers, barbers,
lumbermen, and so on, diminishing In
ratio until the lowest average la reach
ed, as before stated, among the farm
ers. "The man without a country" has
figured In romantic story, but It la the
man with two countries who gives the
American State Department much of
Its work, especially In conducting
diplomatic relations with such govern
ment aa those of Rusbla and Turkey.
Nearly all nations claim as clUiens. or
subjects, persons born In their terri
tory; nearly all nations also claim for
ln-bvru chiklrvu of their own eitl
sent. There Is thus an overlapping of
interests, or a conflict of laws, which
baa given rise to prolonged discussion.
Armenians, wbo are subjects of Tur
key, come here In large numbers and
are naturalised. -On going back to Ar
menia they often get into trouble with
the government and naturally call for
American protection. Before the liber
ation of Cuba, the Cubans wbo bad
acquired American cithteushlp were
peculiarly active la embarrassing
Spaulsh rule. Great Britain has a law
that If Its naturalised citlsens go back
to the country of their origin they are
not entitled to the protection of British
law after two years. Although the
American policy has been somewhat
conflicting. It Is now recognised that
the obligation which Is due to a natur
alised el U ton who goes to the country
of his birth from other parts of the
world Is not the same as If he had
gone direct from the United States.
On occasions, however, this govern
ment has stood vigorously for the pol
icy that there are no degrees In the
binding force of naturalisation. Some
countries are equally resolute In
branding expatriatou as a crime. Many
Interesting Incidents involving these
policies of nations have lately arisen,
notably the refusal of Russia to recog
nise American passports when Issued
to Russian Jews naturalized In the
United States.
Young man! You love your mother
and you take occasion to show your
love for her lu ways that she well un
derstands. But your father, my boy.
You love him, too. In a differeut sort
of way. But do you honor him? And
uo you show that you do? Deep down,
below the crust of course you 'honor
your father. But not until you have a
boy of your own will you know how
much you hurt your father's heart
when you flout his advice or show by
your manner that you think the "old
man" la a kind of a back number. Just
so certainly as you live there will
come a day when you will remember
your unfillal attitude toward your dad
and be sorry for it. And then It will
be too late. Father may be sleeping
In bis grave and you will nave a life
long regret The keenest remorse you
will ever know will be the memory of
your 111 treatment or lack of respect
for your father. When the thought of
present days shall come to you, you
will remember that you often showed
your mother the affection you felt for
her and denied It to yonr father, whom
you also loved. Remember, son. that
father's ways are not your mother's
ways. Father has had to fight the
world for your bread and butter and
the world has taught him to conceal
his feelings. He loves you just as
much as mother does only he cannot
show It Under his vest he yearns for
your filial smile. And when you do
anything to be proud of nobody on
earth la prouder of you than father.
Of course, I know, you think father Is
not In every respect up-to-date, that he
hasn't kept up with the proration and
that sometimes he Is unnecessarily
firm and arbitrary. All that may be
true. But the chances are father
knows more about almost everything
than you do. When you are, say, 30
years old. you will realize tnat fact
If you live a long time In this world,
my boy, you will always be led to say
that the safest and sanest adviser you
ever had was your father. Tonor the
man' wbo looks like you.
He Got Them.
"Gentlemen.' began the fakir as he
arranged numerous bottles on a little
table at a downtown street corner and
prepared for business, "has anyone In
this crowd got a toothache?"
but no one advanced.
"Has anyone an earache or a head
ache?" Not a man bad anything to say.
"Very well, then; but are you
troubled with Insomnia? Are you low
spirited, and do you find yourself
thinking of suicide?"
The appeal was like the other In
vain. The crowd elbowed each other,
but no one advanced.
"Very well, gentlemen; very well.
Now, Is there anyone here who in
dulges In Intoxicants and wishes to
conceal the fact from the women folk?
If so, I guarantee that one drop of
this marvelous preparation placed on
the tongue will Instantly remove the
odor of any"
There was a mad rush from all di
rections, and forthe next five min
utes be gave change and passed eut
the bottles with both bands.
This Utilitarian ngt.
It is told of an American millionaire
who bought a castle on the Rhine that
one cold day bis daughter found him
warming bis bands at a fire which he
had kindled In a suit of plate armor.
"Oh, papa, what have you been do
ing?" she cried.
"The feller that patented that
stove," replied the lord of the castle,
"must have been crazy, bnt I've made
the old thing heat up at last" Tit
Bits. Don't Let the Years Count.
Age will never succeed in retaining
a youthful appearance and mentality
until people make op their minds not
to let the years count until they cease
to make the body old by the constant
suggestions of the mind. Success
Magazine.
In the Whirl
"Boston has a new theater called
the nub."
"It ought to be the busy section."
"Why?"
"So much going round It" Cler
land Plain Dealer.
OPINIONS OF GREAT PAPERS ON IMPORTANT SUBJECTS
What Japan U Tracking,
WHETHER the war In the East ends eventually
lu a triumph for Russia or Japan. It already has
taught the world an Important lesson. That
lesson la that the capacity for civilisation Is uot
coutlnej to the European, nor even to the Caucasian, races.
It sounds barbarous to speak of success in war as a proof
of civilisation. A noted Japanese recently said that when
his country contained the only great artists In the world
It was classed among the barbarians, but now that It has
shown Its ability to fight It Is recognised as civilised. That
la fine sarcasm, yet It Is an Indisputable fact that a nation's
civilisation Is proved, to a considerable exteut by Its
military power. The reason Is that there are few higher
testa of mentil capacity than the ability to organise, to
finance aud to command successfully a great modern army.
Mere phytic! courage Is a quality In which the barbarian
usually surpasses the clvlltiaed man. For this reason,
the conflicts between civilization and barbarism would In
evitably result In the triumph of barbarism, and the world
would be kept always lu a state of savagery. If It were
not for the fact that the mental superiority of the civilized
man enables him to direct his fighting forces with more
skill and effectiveness.
Japan has proved Its civilization, therefore, not by the
fanatical courage of Its soldiers, which at Its beat falls
short of that of the Arab of the Soudan, but by the fact
that these men show tralued and disciplined mentality es
sential to make them act together as regiments, corps and
armies, and still more by the fact that It has developed
leaders competent to organize and to command them. Only
men of superior mind could do thl at all. The power
and resources of Russia may yet defeat them In their
attempt to conquer Manchuria, but they will have won
their place among the civilized nations Just the same.
Buffalo Express.
Why Bior.rap'ilfs Are Read.
PEOPLE run to read the lives of successful men In
the hope of finding the key to their characters and
careers. In order to search for the magic clue which
has guided them to the goal which all strive so often
fruitlessly to gain. As a rule this hope I vnln. Great
men either cannot or will not communicate their secrets to
others. Sometimes they lack the power of expressing
themselves; sometimes they are unconscious of their own
method; sometimes they simply do not rioose to make the
world a present of their secret. Ak the successful com
mercial msn bow be has made his fortune, and generally
be will answer. "O'a. by Industry and perseverance." The
statement Is ludicrously and patently untrue. Thousands
of Industrious and persevering men pass
day wbo are painfully unsuccessful. The ten thousandth
man has his pint of luck worth a ton of skill, or his knack
of Judgment; but be Is not going to give himself away.
8aturday Review.
Back to the Farm. ,
THINGS on the farm are changing, and we already
observe. If we watch the barometer of social life, that
there Is a tendency to get back to the country. Fif
teen years ago, for instance, less than 50 per rent of
the population were moving countryward; In WW) the sta
tistics show that 70 per cent were seeking homes In rural
districts, and it Is likely that the pro(Krtlou now going
away from the city reaches 7." per cetit. At last, with Sol
omon, they are discovering that "all Is vunlty" In the cities;
that friendships are difficult, that iiek'htora don't know the
names one of the other, that n'se, dirt, confusion are there
i
A RESOlRCEflL PATRIOT,
Rufus Putnam was a man of much
natural ability, although people lu
general are less familiar with his Rev
olutionary deeds than with those of
Lis relative. Gen. Isruel llitnum, r
"Old I'tit," as be wns called. Mis
Roucnn Buell. In her "Mcmolis of
Rnfus Putnam," says that ut the
breaking out of the war he entered
the service as lieutenant colonel lu a
regiment commanded by Col. David
Brewer, and was stationed at Rox
bury. After the battle of Bunker Hill It
was feared that the enemy would
make Incursions into the surrounding
country, and the necessity of defen
sive works at points leading from P-ov
ton was apparent Colonel Grldley,
who laid out the work at Cambridge,
could not be obtained, and the com
manding officer, General Thomas,
having beard that Putnam had al
ready had Borne practical experience
in erecting defenses, Insisted upon
bis assuming the task.
"But, general," sold the young offi
cer, "I 'have never even rend u word
on the science of fortification!"
General Thomas would take no ex
cuse, and Putnam Immediately com
menced tracing out lines In front of
Roxbury toward Boston, mid various
other places on the Roxbury side, par
ticularly at Hewell's Point. When
General Washington and General Lee
first examined the situation of the
troops find works on the Roxbury side
of the river, they particularly npprovej
of Putnam's work.
In January and February, 1770,
General Washington was engaged In a
plan for crossing the he and attacking
the British In Boston, or for drawing
them away from the town by taking
possession of Dorchester Neck. The
latter plan was preferable but for one
thing. The ground was frozen so deep
that It was impossible to throw up
breastworks In the usual way.
One day at dinner at headquarters
Generul Washington requested Colonel
Putnam to remain after the others
left. In the Interview which followed,
the commander-in-chief asked the
young officer If be could think or sug
gest any way In which the Neck or
Heights could be fortified. t
"It was an unsolved problem when
I left Washington," Colonel Putnam
wrote in his journay of the period.
"And now mark these singular cir
cumstances, which I call providence.
I left headquarters with another gen
the bank every
tleman, and In our way chine by Gen
eral Heath's. I had no thought of
calling till I came by his door, and
then I said:
"'Let us call on General Heath.'
"My companion agreed. 1 bad no
other motive than to pay my respects
to the general, but while there I cast
my eyes on a book on the table, letter
ed on the back 'Muller's Field En
gineer.' I Immediately requested the
hum of the hook.
"impossible, was the general's re
ply, i never lend my books.'
"I repented my request, and was
again refused. 'But, gin-ral.' said I.
you must recollect thut you were one
wbo, at Roxbury, In a measure com
pelled me to undertake a business
which at that time I bad never read
a word about, end you must let me
have that book.' After some more ex
cuecs on bis part and close pressing on
mine. I obtained a loan of the book.
"The next morning, as soon as an
opKrtunlty offered, I took my book
from the chest, and looking over the
contents, I found the word 'Chan
deliers' (portable parapets).
"What Is that?" I thought it In
something I never heard of before;
but no sooner did I turn to the pa go
where It was doscrlbod, with Its use,
than I was ready to report a plan for
making n lodgment on Dorchester
Neck. The report was approved, and
a lodgment was made on the night
of the 4th of March. Such were tho
circumstances which led to the dis
covery of a plan which obliged the
enemy to leave Boston."
Soon after, Colonel Putnam was
sent by Washington to New York b
lay out and superintend as chief en
gineer the works which were erected
during the campaign In New York and
Long Island and their dependencies nt
Fort Lee, Fort Washington and King's
Bridge.
SORROW AND bUtoHiclON.
Much Harm Pone by Thoughtless
Criticism of Those In Jtereavement.
"Thank you!" said the shabby little
woman, tremulously, as ibe received
back her old bonnet with a knot of
black ribbon replacing its antique red
flower. "It's real kind of you, Mis'
Aylwln; real kind! I. suppose I'd
ought to' have thought of It myself,
but I didn't; that's all. There wasn't
any room In my mind for clothes,
somehow. Sister Ellen and I never
cared much for outward marks of
mourning, anyway. Ellen used to say
she'd plenty of pity for folks that
vere bearing grief, but they weren't
always the same folks that were wear
ing it But I don't feel like flaunting
and the struggle to live Is at tht desperate itif all th
time.
The telephone, the trolley line, free rural mall delivery
these are mitigating the unsocial side of rural life, and
the beauty of nature la doing the rest. Intelligent men and
women seek the the health of their famlles, physical, moral
and spiritual, are taking up homes where arret abound,
and are giving the rural life something It bat lacked be
fore. The practical farmer fluda lu these additions to bis
neighborhood circle stimulus and cheer, aud the children
of the farm, and of the families from the city find mutual
pleasure In association. The movement Is an all-round good
on. It marks a new era lu rural life and a chance of
Inestimable value to thosn with murage enough to pull tip
stakes and leave the town. It Is one of the moat encour
aging sigus of the times. -Opportunity.
Whea Old Age Comet Creeping On.
WHAT the country shall do with Its ex presidents
la not nearly so vital a problem as wbst It shsll
do with Its old men.
According to the hew gospel of bustnest
economics a man Is "old" at fifty. That Is to say, he can
no longer remain an Integral part of the Industrial machine
Young men are In demand everywhere. Old men are In
demand nowhere. Tho commercialism of the age feeds
upon young Wood and rejects everything else.
Most of the railroads have placed an age limit upon
their pay roll account. It Is a tacit rule that no msn over
forty-five years of age shall be employed, even at clerical
work.
One of the great steel coniantes of the country, em
ploying thousands of men, recently adopted a rule thst In
certain departments requiring expert knowledge and skill
no man over thirty five years of age should be given em
ploy men t. Other large Industries are following a sltullst
policy.
Practically the same thing It true In the professions.
Except as a counsellor the old lawyer Is not In demand.
The churches are calling for young ministers, and the
schools give preference to young teachers. When a man
reaches the age of fifty he Is supposed to have crossed tin
deud line.
It Is a strange commentary on our modern civilization
that while medical science Is (tending every energy to pro
long the span of human life to people the world with old
men the tendency of our economic system Is to drive
them out of business, (o mnke them a charge upon the
world, which Is snld to owe every man a lllvng.
Here Is a question for political economists to digest, l(
possible, for the benefit of the coming generation. What
shsll the world do with Its old men? Chicago Journal.
Menace of the Airship.
T Is now rumored that the United states Government
Is somewhat disturbed by the possibilities suggested by
recent advancement made In the perfection of the air
ship. It has been Intimated that the flying machines
may be employed to transport dutiable goods across the
border.
It la contended that here on the Niagara frontier, where
smuggling Is already a thriving Industry, that an airship
could take on a cargo and sail away never to come back
if the navigator so decided, eluding capture easily.
An exchange shows the Imminent danger by observing:
"What .a well navigated airship could do on the Canadian
border as a smuggler can only be surmised. Such a ship
obeying Its rudder Implicitly could sail back Innocently
3ver the border If In any danger of being detected ami elude
the Government sleuths." Buffalo Inquirer.
guy colors, the Lord knows; and I
don't want to show any dlsrcsert "
she choked, and then added, "I sup
pose folks have hecu saying I'm heart
less, but I just forgot. I've been
ujsslng Ellen so!"
Yet there bud Indeed been some
reckless tongues to call heartless her
piteous forget fulness. Tongues of tint
same kind dropxil pill In tho sym
pathy they expressed for another be
reaved womnn.
"Poor thing! I'm sorry for her. But
dlil you know she attended the sewing
circle three days after the funeral? Of
course she must have been fond of
her daughter but It was certainly
strange."
It was strange, as It Is strange that
a man mortally hurt sometimes keeps
on with his task of the moment me
chanically, till he drops. Under tho
shock of a great wound of the spirit
the poor mother, half -stunned, had
gone on, unthinking and uncaring,
with ber round of II fo In Its usual
order, of which the weekly sewing cir
cle was a part.
The grief of the mourner, when it Is
accepted as genuine, draws genuine
sympathy from nil but a scant few of
the worst of us. But there are many,
neither best, nor worst, nor even bad,
who allow themselves to suspect n
grief not borne as they would bear It.
If a person observes prescribed eti
quette minutely In dress and de
meanor, thero ore those to whisper
"affectation" or "exaggeration;" If one
seeks, earlier than strict convention
decrees, tho heeded relief of company
or music, there nre others to breathe
of unseemly haste to forget; If ono of
that Impulsive but often most loving
nature which Is all ups and downs
and sudden transitions Is seen for a
moment chatting and laughing after
recent afflictions, some accusing voice
will murmur "shallow" or "frivolous,"
' It In the fact that despite the rules
and conventions which hedge the per
iod of mourning, people remain as dif
ferent in sorrow as we freely admit
them to be In Joy. No truly sweet and
helpful sympathy will be soured or
withdrawn because of such differe
nces. That Is a poor kind of pity
whose soul-mate Is suspicion. Youth'
Companion,
Jurist Is Aoiive at 00 Years.
Judge Charles Field of Athol, Mass..
Is the oldest member of the bar In New
England, and the oldest judge In the
United States wbo is at present exer
cising full judicial functions. Although
90 years old. Judge Field sits on his
court bench almost every day, either
at Athol or Gardner,
A Little Lesson
In Patriotism
"Let our object be our oountry, our
whole country, ami nothing but our
country." Daniel Webster.
The type of character that distin
guished 7.tcbary Taylor la his own
times from his contemporaries was
that of ths oldett
heroes of the revo
lution. Schuyler and
Moultrie and Pluck,
ney, He wss con
tent with the mere
performance, of h!a
duty, asking no r.
ward other than bis
ability to be of ser
vice. Tsylor'a defense
iaciumt tatu or tort narrison
In the war of 1812 agnlust an attack
of tho M In mis Is one of the most mem
orable Incidents of the sttuggle.
Although himself almost' disabled
with fever and with a fore of only
fifteen competent men, he saved lh
fort by bis stunting coiirag and
pluck.
In the Black Hawk war of 1XU
and In the Florida war of Taylor
distinguished himself for his valor un
der the most trying circumstances.
When the Mexican war broke out
It found him In command of the fron
tier. From Palo Alto to llcseea de la
Palms, from Monterey to Buena Vis
ta, Taylor was ever In the thick of
the conflict
Two years after the battle of Buena,
Vista the brave commander of ih
American force was Installed as
President of the United States, the
first President elected on a reputation
purely military.
His death came so soon afterwar1
that It Is difficult to estimate what bin
administration would have been. It Is
not too much to ssy. however, that a
man who bad shown his patriotism n
had 7-acbary Taylor upon the field of
battle would not have failed In tho
executive department of the govern
ment ROPED A CALIFORNIA (JON.
Novsl Manser la Which a tvn-Koot
Animal Was Klilstl by Co who jr.
A fight worthy of being recounted In
any tale of thrilling adventure wns
enacted last week or the Morrow
ranch, which lies on the Mount Hsinll
ton range extending from the observa
tory south for many miles. During
the last month E. F. Robinson, fore
man of the ranch, bad noticed that
their young colts were decreasing In
numbers with alarming rapidity. Al
most every morning the mangled car
cass of a colt would be found. Tracks
around the slaughtered animals told
the story of the mountain lion. A
close watch was kept, but the depre
dations continued as before and the
lion evaded all efforts to kill htm or
drive him away.
One morning Robinson, with a bunch
of cowboys, was rounding tip soma
stock In a remote section of the ranch
when the dog with them started a
large animal In a thicket They tried
to send the dog Into the bushes, but
ho cowered awny. Huddenly an Im
mense California lion left the cover
and ran up a urge onk tree near by.
There were no wenons In the crowd
and Robinson was afraid to send one
of the men to the wngon for a rlflo
lest they lose sight entirely of tho
animal.
Ammltngly they formed a cordon
around the tree aud let out their rlatns
at the lion. Tho animal stood at bay
and warded off the rawhides with bin
paws. The men had almost despaired
of accomplishing anything when Nolby
Trimble, the crack rldor of the Morrow
ranch, volunteered to leave tho circle
and climb a nearby tree to endeavor
to cast the rope In a differeut man
ner. He did thin at the risk of hie
life, i After repeated failures ho suc
ceeded when tho lion's head was turn
ed the opposite way. The other
rlatns fell quickly one aft,er the other
and the animal was hangod then and
there.
Tho skin Is in beautiful condition
and measures over seven feet from tip
to tip. It Is at present at the Santa
Clara tannery. San Joso Daily Mer
cury. Athletics and Consumption.
There must be no exercise as oxer
clso for the consumption patient. If
you nre able to feel like It, amuse
yourself, but don't takn exercise to
build your system up. I know. I, too,
have heard those stories about men
given up to die, who began work In
a gymnasium, and by violent exerclsu
entlrely recovered their henlth. You
mustn't believe nil the physical culture
people tell you, any more than all the
patent medicine people ten you.
'ihey're both In the miracle business.
When the lung tissue Is attacked by
tuberculosis It bonis, if It heals at
all, by this fibrous sear-material filling
In the cavity. No new lung tlBsuo la
formed to replace what has been lost,
and this scar material Is useless for
breathing. Bupposo you hnd a deep
cut in your hand and you kept work
ing that hand violently, how long do
you think It would take the cut to
heal? When exercise is taken or you
"expand the lungs," you have to work
the lung tissue just as you work your
Land, and If it Is wounded thero will
be a much larger proportion of scar
material useless for breathing when It
docs get well. Everybody's Magazine.
In this ago of fairness, a man who
Is being abused need oulj keen, itM.,
fit