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About The Columbia register. (Houlton, Columbia County, Or.) 1904-1906 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 19, 1904)
Ecoiiomy U a strong point with Hood's Sarsaparilla. A bottle lasts longer and does more good than any Other. It Is the only medicine of which can truly be said 1 00 DOSES ONE DOLLAR He Knew They Would Flu A UUi1m1i1 Coogrvaauna. aaya the New Origin riiayune, once own ed liauclaome pair ef light gray trouarra which wire much admired by Lit colored Brljjlibora. Unfortun ately tbi-y became allotted. "Here, Charlie." wild the Ceiurreaii. nun to a negro aervuut who Lid long coveted them, "take those truUHcra and clonn tlioiu." Charllo took tbrm borne, and after two day of careful Inactivity brought uirin uaca. wruae me, aeaa.- ne Bald, "hut eiain 10 gracious, aeoru ilk Ah cala git dat apot out ao way." "Mil you bruU ltr "Ybbmcu." 'Benin ltr Yaaneh.M "Bcoup ur "Yaaaru. 'Prnr like Ah dona erV thine, but Ah Jo' calu't git It out ae way. "Well, did you try ammonia r -No, ach! No, atbr exclaimed Char- II. Willi a delighted aalcker. "Ah didu't try m on ino ylt, aeb, but Ah knows dey'd fltr Still More Evidence. Hay City, 111., August 8 (Special. Mr. K. Y. Henley oi tbla cltr add liia ovldenre to that publiahed elmoat dally that aura tura (or ltheumatiam la now before the American jwople and mat :nat (ore la Djdd'a Kidney l'illa Air. lien ley bad Acute Kheumatlam lie baa uaed Dodd'a Kidney l'illa. He taya oi the reeult: "Alter Buffering for elxteen yeara with JUifumatiptn and uaing numerous tnedklnea for ltheumatiam and more luedlclnea preaeribed by doclora, I at laat tried Do-U'a Kidney l'illa with the result that I got more benefit fror them than all the others put together. "Dodd'a Kidney rills were the only tiling to give me lelief, and I icom mend them to all Buffering from Acute Kiieumatlam." Itheumatiam I caused by Uric Arid in the blood. Healthy kidneys take ail the Uric Acid out of the blood Dodd'a Kidney Pills make healthy iune;s. Reproving the Apostate. la the early daya of the Itrltlnh Royal Academy reverence for the "old masters" of painting amounted almost to worship. When at a dinner Sir Martin Sbee, one ef the early preal dent a. openly exprcsaod doubU ef their Infinite auperlorlty, aays M. A. 1 hla hearers were horrified. Sir Martin leaned serosa the dinner table and rapped upon It to empha size bla points. "Now there's Raphael 1" he thun. dered. "What did Itnpbael do that we can't do hotter nowadays? Old mas ter? Why, gentlemen, I'd be sorry to think we had not a dozen men In the Ii. A. now whe can draw better than llapbael." The bold declaration was too much for old Woodburn, a picture dealer, who Bat opposite. "Sir Martin," he said, huskily, futrly pale with emotion, "I've often eard people say they didn't admire 'Omer. Hut this Is the first time, sir, I've ever card It said that It waa 'Outer's fault" Knee Icy LipuwoKrmrt-TPBAcr.o Tjre "ADITS rERMArtLNUT CURED e w rOR FULL fAKTKULARS fM wmitr immurr,- pontlano.omc, Gentle Hint. They were pluylng tenids on the old lawn. "Dear me,' remarked the younj man, with a far-away look In his eyes, "wo never hear of old-fashioned kiss ing gnmoH any more. They huve gone out of style." "I don't agree with you," replied the pretty girl, "any gnme Is a klssiu game If you supply the kisses." rlTP Permanently iron, fronts or nerroaiMet 1 1 III after flint day's uwtuf Dr.Kllno'iUMt N JU-iionr. Heml for Free S)3 trial bmtlnand treaties. 1. H. U. K Hue. Ltd.. W Arch Ht.. Philadelphia, ia All In the Pen. She What la the term applied to ene who signs another person's nams to a check? He Five or ton yeara usually, I be lieve. riM i uure u a rooa courn It has cured coughs and colds for forty years. At druggists, 25 cents. The Fable of Four Hen. "I got off a street car this morning," anld a doctor to me, "and, being In no hurry, I began moralizing on the ac tions and probable character of three men who had alighted just ahead of me. The first ono was veven then half way down the block and was going on with such rapid strides that he bad already put a couple of hundred yards between himself and the next man. There,' thought I, 'goes a hustler a man who's bound to succeed in life.' The second man was walking rather slower, and Impressed me as one who would do' fairly well, perhaps, In this world. But the last fellow was Just dawdling along in the most shiftless sort of way. I very quickly set him down for a loafer. "Just then another Idea came home to me. AU three were ahead of mar Success, :.. ; - , .,, . : : Eht narrlrd Pparklra to raform alas, fck Indeed. Il areme baDDT. lie He la. 8ke failed. Kh.n "Yen bold bv future happlneaa," be to! the girl. -Why dou't yefl bold It yeuraelfr ale aaked. coyly. Chlcage Tost "Kiperlence, yen know. Is a good eaeher." "Ym. but 1 wish there were ure vacations In thut aihooU" Chl cugo roaLt "Are your Intentlona toward t!i wiuow serleiia?" "Oh. very. I am go- itg. ir possible, to get out of marry Ing her." Ufe. Tailor Do you want padded aboul oers, my little man? Willie Naw y-o e pania: Data where I need u meat Chicago News "Wd Jerrold get anything out of hla rich uncle's eatater "WWI, rather ne married the daughter of the attor ney for the estate." Ex. uoston t.overneaa Yes, children, the eyea enable ua to see. Now, Emer son, tell me what the nosa la tnr Little Emerson It's for holding eys- Siaaaea. i-ura. BlobbB Have you ever bad anv ex perlenoe with train robbera on your travela? Slobba Well, I've stacked op against a good many rullman car posters. ITjrladerphla Itecord "I don't believe bachelora have any atari,- she said. "Why, we're juat the men who do have them," be re- pnea. "Why Is thatr she asked. uecauae we haven't lost them." Willie Pa. can't I bave som ra oee nere! You've got a plateful or rooa before you. Willie -Yea. air VUi r well, keep your mouth shot and eat It. Philadelphia Public meager. A new orders "You don't mean to "7 yon girls have atarted a secret so ciety r "Yes. It's a society whose members pledge themselves to tell all the eocrets they know." Philadelphia imager. uanmoai King-That missionary maoe an awrui fuss, didn't he? Head Chief Terrible, air. Hla strugitlee were frightful. Caunlbnl King Well, serve him ss a piece de resistance. Town Topics, She Hut If you say you can't bear the gtrl, why ever did you propose ne wen, ner people have alwava been awfully good to me. and it'a the only way I could return their bospt lamy. punch. "How I envy that boy!" said Smith Yes." acquleeced his friend; "we all envy a sturdy youngster like that for hla youth " "Oh, that's not lti He's the butcher's boy, and you should near the way he talks to my wife!" uome, now," said mamma, who had taken the children for a walk through the Zoo, "let's go home and see papa." "Oh, nor' protested Elsie, "let's see these other monkeys first" -Philadelphia Press. ur me New York kind: "Would you mind keeping that bat on?" "Keep It on! Why, I waa Just about to take It off." "I: know it But I don't want to see any more of this play than I can helD." Life Gothamlte I hear you hare a Vas- sar graduate for a cook. Isn't it rath er expensive? Harlemlte Not very. She works for her board and clothes. Gothamlte Why, how does she come to do that? Harlemlte Sbe'a my wife. Harlem Life. uuromc onopper now mucn are n your Baldwin apples? Fruit Vender Fifteen cents a quarter-peck. Chron lc Shopper Can't you sell me a quar ter-peck for 12 cents? Fruit Vender Yes, but not so big a quarter-peck. Baltimore American. Their meeting: She (flushing ex pectantly) Fred Smlthers, as I live! Poor fellow It saddens me to think how broken up he was over my re fusal. He (wrinkling forehead) Where In thunder have I seen that woman before? Brooklyn Life. "Why does Mrs. Clubwoman look so sua r "The world's Injustice to woman has Just struck her forcibly again." "How was that?" "She hap pened to think that Martha Washing ton Isn't called the Mother of her Country." Cincinnati Times-Star. Applicant (for position as cook) How many afthrrnoons out durln' the wake, mlm? Mrs. Hlghmore Well, of course, you can have every Thurs day, and Applicant I'm askln yc, mlm, how many afthernoons out ye want yersllf. Chicago Tribune. Towne Hear what Snlffkins did when the collection plate came 'round to him In church last Sunday? Browne No. Dropped a button in, I sup pose. Towne Not . even that He leaned over and whispered: "I paid the pastor's fare in the car yesterday morning. We'll call It square. Phil adelphia Press. "Mandy, d'e ree'lect how Henry Wiggins used to play marbles all the time when he was a little feller?" Goodness, yes." "Well, he hain't got ever his hankerln' after 'em ylt; this piece, in the paper 'bout millionaires' bouses says he has one of the finest lections of Italian marbles In the hull world." Brooklyn Life. "Is It true," asked the Interviewer, that when you first came to this country you worked in your shirt sleeves for a living?" "it Is not," re plied the successful, public man, In dignantly. "Ah! No offense 1 hope "When I came here," con tinued the successful man, "I didn't have a shirt "--Cincinnati Times-Star, Ayer's Feed your hair; nourish it; give it something to live on. Then It will stop falling, and will rov long ind heavy. Ayer'a Hair Vigor Is the only Hair Vigor halrfoodyoucanbuy. For.60 years it has been doing just what we claim it will do. It will not disappoint you. " Mr hilr,n4 In tx rr iliort Hut aft inn Aft n. ir virra horini Is rrno.tad anv II I tunrixn larli !. TIU Main, a ipl.tirtKI r.anll le at fur balKf ailMn.1 lihoni any balr." Mm, J. It. Virsa, Cvlarado Spring. Colo. f I a bolllo. , n. ath f All rtriirrl.i. g ll Mwi Short Hair A Fisherman. When all the world's fragrant with flow era in bloom. And clothed In freah raiment from Dame atun a loom: Wben the hllla and the valleya are vel vety areen Ana the earth la reposing 'neata blna (klea rc-rene, . Then away from the bat, dusty city I'll . ataal. For my only companions my rod and my reel, And there, by tha aide of soma cool, lira phi atream, I'll alt with my line in tha water and dream. Four-Track Newa. CASTOR 1 A ?or Infants and Children. Tha Kind Yea Hare Always Bough! Bears the Signature Pride Interceded. "Why did she marry him? He hasn't any money. "I know, but she has plenty." "But he hasn't any brains, either." "True, too. But people kept telling her how stunning they looked together till she Just couldn't bear the Idea of letting him get away." Detroit Free Press. Mow's TbJs? We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward for an t cue of Catarrh thai cannot be cured by liall'i Catarrh Cure. F. i. CHENEY A CO., Props., Toledo, 0. We. the underlined, have known K. J. Chauay lor the lait 15 years, and believe hjm jenocuy nunorauis in mil imuneaa irtnua. lorn and financially able to carry out anv oh. HKawuui uauo vj ineir nrm. W ut & Tauax, Wboleiala Drurjrliti. Toledo. 0. W ALSiMo, K lux ah A Mabtim, vtnoleaale lruc (Lit. Toledo. O. liall'i Catarrh Cnra la taken Internally, act- inf oareciiT upon mo piooa ana mucoua sur faces of tha ivltem. trica tha. mr tmttl. oiu djt ait vrugguia. leaiimoniais uea. UaU'a yaally fills are the best. Borry lie Rpoke. Ilusband I'd like to know what en Joyment you And In trotting around from store to store, looking at and pricing things you cannot purcLwse? Wife I know It looks silly, yet thera la a sort of melancholy nleasure In knowing I could have bought them had I married Tom Coldcash when I had the chance, Instead of throwing myself away on you. You Can Oct Allen's Foot-Cue FREE. Write Allen 8. Olmitnl. T nn w v imi free sample ol Allen's Foot-Eaae. It cures sweating, notawoiien. aching feet. It make, saw or tight ihoei eauy. a certain cure for corns, tnrrowtngnaili and bunions. All drug- giaisseuit. 2bc. Don't accept any aubstitute. A Precedent. MIg-glee I sar. old man. I'd Ilka t nave you put me un at your eluh. V iggles I'd be only too elad. mr hnr. cut er they are very nartieular who mey admit. MiRgles Ton don't ear! IIow In the world did you manage to break in. ABSOLUTE SECURITY. taaMBBBBBBBBBV Cenujne Carter's Little Liver Pills. Mutt Bear Signature of 5ee Fac-Slmlla Wrapper Below. Tery tall amd aa eaay totakeaasegaaw rCX REAOACRL FOR DIZZINESS. FOR BILIOUSNESS. FOR TORPID LIVER. FOR CONSTIPATION. FOR SALLOW SKI. FOR THE COMPLEXION taTSk I Purely TafetaMey&igS CURE SICK HEADACHE. eumsHtu iiMfiuT" Cough Sirup. Taitea OooaCi r'IJMllAljr.ijf iu .iium. sola dt am.M.u CARTERS r?ITTlE m AN Ur.TO-DATE NAVAJQi Tad. Irndlaa Warn a a WaaU m Oe-CH Ver alar I'ipmm. There Is no preuder mother among the India a women at the Worlds Fair Indian coleny tha a Bkyblue. a Neva woman. Bkyblue 1 not only pruud f her ll.tle S months old Chee. bat ahe la also ambitious for her baby's rights. Bkyblue believes that Chee Is now a Werld'e Fair baby, and bae a perfect right to the dignity of Buch a title, that Bhe should. In keep ing with such dig nity, possess a mod ern tiahv rarrlava QUAW A .AST. Bkybu'f itt.nd;d the opening of the Model Tlaygrounds the other day. There she saw dainty little carriages, upholstered In blue allk, with tiny white bankets and coun terpanes with lace edges. Skyblue took her own little Chee to the baby's party, strapped in the leather and bark papoose frame, to her back. Chee was content and very happy. Her big bright, dark eyes took In the pretty scene with an apparently perfect un derstanding of metropolitan social ways. Hut Skyblue did not bave a happy moment after she saw the little go carts and was told to what use they were pot. Sne resolved then and there that she would have one. She Is a large, healthy woman, and the excuse that she was not strong enough to carry her papoose on her back she knew would not carry weight with the Indian officials. The only rea son she knew of that she should have a new sort of carriage was based on her theory tbat'-nothlng was too good for little Cbee." She was given to understand that she would be permitted to purchase one, but that she would not be al lowed to use It while In St Louis, for the officials argued that auch an Inno vation would spoil their exhibit This question of Imitation among the Indians Is one of the most per sistent that the Indian officials bave to contend with. Nearly every day one of the squaws, the young children and. the chiefs suggest to Dr. McGow an, superintendent of the exhibit, that they would like to have some article of clothing, or some one thing, that they have seen and admired on their white sisters or brothers. A Navajo woman, who recently ar rived at the Indian school, wants a modern baby carriage in which to car ry her papoose, Chee. If she cannot get a baby carriage she would accept a "roller chair." THE BIBLE AND OTHER BOOKS. Three Hundred Million Copies of the Hcrlptnree Circulated In Century. On Wednesday, March 7, 18M, "i numerous and respectable meeting of persons of various denominations" was held at the London Tavern, and a so ciety formed "to promote the clrcula tlon of the Holy Scriptures lu the prln clpal living languages." At that time the Bible, or portions of It, could be obtained In about forty living lan guages, spoken by two-ten tbs of the race. During the century since the meeting at the London Tavern ad journed, and very largely from the machinery then and there started, the Scriptures have been translated into 450 langauges and dialects, understood by seven-tenths of the race. By the London society alone ISO.000,000 copies have been distributed, at an expense of 170,000,000. If we add to this total tho 70,000,000 copies already distributed by the younger American Bible Society, and the unknown millions printed and sold by private enterprise, we find our selves Inside a safe estimate if we hold that certainly 300,000,000 copies of the Scriptures, In whole or separate books or portions, have gone Into circulation during the last century. Amazement attends the study of the Bible, whatever the point of view or the course pursued. But pothlng about the Bible Is more amazing than its continuous, universal and utterly un paralleled popularity. In nearly every, if not every, country on earth where books are sold, more Bibles are sold than any other book. Last year the British and Foreign Bible Society alone distributed 5,943,775 copies, the majority by sale, In 370 languages, covering every part of the globe. And the Issue by the American Society for the year amounted to 1,993,553 Bibles and portions. Century. Going to Be Something. A colored man In Philadelphia re quested his employer to release him so that he could go South. "What do you want to go for, La fayette?" " 'Cos I'se called to a church down dar." "Called to a church? What are you going to be?" "I'se goin' to be sumfln. I dunno whedder I be de pasture, or de sex tant or de vestureman, but I'se goin' te be sumfln." Success. A Qaeev Way or Telling Time. In Malay the natives keep a record of time In the following way: Floating in a bucket filled with wa ter they place a cocoanut shell hav ing a small perforation, through which by slow degrees the water finds its way Inside. This opening is so pro portioned that it takes just one hour for the shell to fill and sink. Then a watchman calls out; the shell is emp tied, and the process Is begun again. There is more humiliation about love than about anything else, for the reason that there Is less naturalness about lovt than about anything else. fx If UMMEE MI The Idea that Rheumatism is strictly a winter disease, that comes from expocure or cold, is wronp:; a spell of indigestion, torpidity of the liver, inactive state of the kidneys, or sudden cooling of the body when over-hcated, being frequent causes of an attack. Rheumatism is due to an over-acid condition of the blood and bad circulation. As it flows through the body the blood deposits an acrid corrosive sediment in the ioints and muscles, and the circulation 1 h2 a t,p?ek of Bc,tIo BhtnmaUna fa it prow, sluggish because of Z$ttp&J&?1fiEZ the constant accumulation fon"nled for KheumaUam, I decided to aire) . r ... , It a trial, and after I bad taken, a few bottle Of acid impurities, and I was able to hobble around on crotches, an when the system is in such 7,rT00,hdfvtheniatalL,B.s.B.heT- ,1 ; t : r I . Ina cared me sound and well. Alltbedlatreaainar Condition Rheumatism IS palnahae left me. my appetite he. ntnraed, III liable to come out at any m hPPT to be aasln reatored to perfect bealta. by exposure to cold, damp air, sudden cooling of the body when over heated, a bad spell of indigestion, or anything that is calculated to fur ther derange and depress the system ; but these are only exciting and not the real cause of Rheumatism. It is in the blood, and when this vital fluid becomes overcharged with the acid impurities and is running riot in the veins, an attack is sure to come, whether in summer time ct the cold, bleak days of winter. You are a slave to pain as long as the blood is tainted with acid. Liniments and plasters are helpful and use ful, but it takes something more than rubbing and blistering to drive, away this demon of pain. S. S. S. goes to the seat of the trouble. eased tinder blood joints aches vanish, and the longed-for relief comes to the nervous, oain tortured sufferers. S. S. S. contains no minerals, but is guaranteed purely vegetable. Write ns if in need of medical advice, which is given without charge. Our book on Rheumatism, telling of the different forms and varieties of tnis pain-racking disease, is mailed free. THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO., ATLANTA, CJL A Traatlea Trust. Lightly My landlady evidently be- longa to a boarding boose combine. bimson Why do you think so? Lightly She doesn't attempt to annnlv the wants of the customer. First Lient Rudoldh E. Sniper, Fonr- teenth cavalry, U. S. A., la the youngeat officer in the army: Lieut. Ernest I Peek la the tallest, being 6 feet 4 inchea. A severe case of Ovarian i Trouble and a terrible operation avoiaea. aits, fcmmons tells how she was saved by the use oi Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound. " Deab Mrs. Pikkham: I am sc f leased with the results obtained from ydla Ii Pinkham's Vegetable Compound that I feel it a duty and a privilege to write you about it. " I suffered for more than five years with ovarian troubles, causing an unpleasant discharge, a great weak ness, and at times a taintness would come ove me which no amount of medicine, diet, or exercise seemed to correct Your Vegetable Compound found the weak spot, however, within a few weeks and saved me from an operation all my troubles had disappeared, and I found myself once more healthy and well. Words fail to describe the real, true, grateful feeling that is in my heart, and I want to til every sick and suffering sister. Don't dally with medicines you know noth ing about, but take Lydia E. Pink ham's Vegetable Compound, and take my word for it, you will be a dif ferent woman in a Bhort time." Mrs. Laura Emmons. Walkervill. Ont SS000 forfeit If nrlnlnal nf hwa l-4t.. ftnulniiHU cannot bt produced. Don't hesitafo tn nrrftn tn MVa Pinkham if there in nnvtTiino about your sickness you do not uiiuersutnu. MO woman ever regretted writincr her smA sh has helped thousands. Address Lynn, Mass. u "DID'INT HURT A BIT" IS WHAT We can extract one or all your teeth with out hurting a bit, and put in new teeth the tame day if you desire. Our system of erown and bridge work la simple, quick and painless. Established in Portland 17 years. The reason we advertise is to let yon know where we are. Open evenings till 9 Sundays from 9 to 12 Phone Main 2029. DK, W. A. Wlsa WISE BROS., Dentists "CYCLONE" ENQ1NES Write for Catalogue and prices THE A. H. AVERILL MACHINERY CO. PORTLAND,1 OREGON. V VI'.' j i) K0 U3Z ro C2TJTCHE3. enters the circulation, neutralizes and fil ters out of the blood the acid poisons. It vwwkt..VUV iWU TV bUBj Ml blood; the general health improve its tonic effect, and when rich, pure begins to circulate through the stiff and sore, tender muscles, oains and Canee and Effect. Wife John, do yoa know that yon a wore in your Bleep last night? , Ilusband Did 1? It most have been when I had that horrid dream. Wife What did you dream? Husband I dreamt I waa smoking one of those cigars yob gave me on my birth day. BEUTEL BUSINESS COLLEGE TAOOMM, WASH. Givea written contract to secure portions lor graduates. These con trafU are guaranteed by a National Bank. Write for catalogue and plan today. PRICES THAT TALK. ThrmhtTmeo and 8awmlll Men Note! 1M ft. End!f- Linen Hutched, Heavy Canvaa, ply. 1 Inch Belting i7.oo. ISO ft. B Inch wide, aunt ae above, S32.0l Tank Parana complete, with IS ft, Inch Knctlon Bone, 10 ft. IMarharge Hoae, with aoa aei and trainer, (10.40. Belting, Hoae and Pecklna al wholesale prlrea. General aenc for Parana Hawkey Belt Feeder. iVaT'nb ingle mill, ruaoair daya, at a bargain. Write for catalog. KEIEBSON MACHINFKV CO. 200 MEN. Wairea 2. per day. Board $4.50 per week. 6U team t2.uu per day. Exten sive irrigation connt ruction. Perma nent employment lor food men and team. Deschutes Irrigation and Power Company BEND. OREGON B U Y FROM YOUR DEALER P.M. U No. 33-104. BEN writing- to advertisers pleaae I mention mis paper. I THEY SAY t'A. ""& PORTLANO, OftEUON RUSSEUU " , THRESHERS WANTED fill' V H
