Quips
and Quotes
Cart System
Some fishermen, whose luck is poor,
Bring sandwiches to make quite rare
That if the fishing's unexciting,
At least SOMEBODY will be biting!
Dick Emmont
A television program had searched for "the happily
married couple" and had found a pair just celebrating'
their 50th anniversary. In the syrupy tones of the typical
tv master of ceremonies, the announcer asked:
"During those 50 years, I understand you never once
considered divorce."
"That's right," the wife replied. "But I did seriously
consider murder." Wilfred Beaver
The worst part of being on a diet is eating with some
body who isn't. Dan Bennett
An elderly lady was learning how to drive and was find
ing things thoroughly confusing. She turned the wrong
direction on a one-way street and was stopped by the fran
tic whistle of a traffic officer.
"Lady," he shouted, "You're headed for trouble didn't
you see all those arrows?"
"Heavens," the lady replied, "I didn't even see any
Indians." Ken Kraft
Lf Taka a Look at tho Record
You're ready, dear lady, with wise advice
On how I should rear my children.
But much as I love you, I'll confess
Your stand is a bit bewilderin'.
For there was a little boy you trained
Who never wore rubbers when it rained
And wouldn't get up when called in the morning;
Who always refused to heed a warning
To watch his digestion, and greeted with scowls
The notion that towel racks were made for towels.
Yes, that little boy, to put it discreetly,
Confounded your child-rearing system neatly.
He clearly evaded your training rules.
Or maybe they ran right through him.
I know, for that little boy grew up,
And now I am married to him!
Georgie Starbuck Galbraith
- e
"This cheek I'm making out to the
beauty parlor what is it fort"
1
I
p you've never gone to Grandmother's house
for Thanksgiving, I pity you.
My grandmother's house wasn't over the river and
through the woods. It was even better.
It was out Tip Highway under the peach trees beside the
smokehouse, and my grandmother was the way all grand
mothers ought to be and seldom are any more. She was
soft and ample with fly-away white hair and twlnkly blue
eyes and love in her for all the world.
At my grandmother's house on Thanksgiving we sat in
the kitchen in the morning, and I rode to Banbury Cross
on Granddaddy's knee while Grandmother fried eggs and
pork chops and potatoes and made gravy. No breakfast
ever after tasted as good.
At my grandmother's house on Thanksgiving the table
cloth was always fine and white because my grandmother
washed clothes every day of her life. And she baked rolls
and pies no mix can ever match, and she preserved jams
and jellies, the like of which you'll never find in a store.
After Granddaddy asked the Lord to bless this food to
our use, Amen, Grandmother passed the ham and turkey,
the apple butter and the peach preserves, the mashed pota
toes and the yams, the turkey gravy and the cornbread
dressing, the succotash, hominy, and mustard greens,- and
the thick slices of homemade bread.
And we drank buttermilk and sweet milk from Bessie,
the cow, and the grownups drank Grandmother's clear,
strong coffee made with an egg and a cheesecloth bag. Then
Grandmother brought out the pumpkin pie and the mince
pie and the hickernuf cake. (Only after I was grown-up
myself did I learn about hickory nuts instead.)
After that, we all had to lie down in the parlor or the'
bedrooms and take a long nap because pretty soon Grand
mother would be out in the kitchen again, and then we
would have homemade ice cream and sugar cookies or a
dish of cornstarch pudding.
That's how it was on Thanksgiving at Grandmother's
house. If you have no memories such as these, then you
are poor, indeed. v
But, ah, how rich am I.
Balloons will thrill
your youngsters too!
Now in new shapes new P""""
colors sealed fresh and I
at variety, drug, If .fc'VJVV
and grocery It fL
stores.. BEN Hi '
stores. ..BEN
FRANKLIN,
SCOTTS, TG4T
and KUStS,
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OAJC, RAVENNA 2, OHIO.
Merry
'Christmas
Lei's SNOWBALL
Christmas happiness
by generous use of
Christmas Seals.
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