Quips and
Quotes
COLDS MISERIES,
SINUS CONGESTION
PAINFUL PRESSURE
''MAXILURY S-"; A
HELPS DRAIN ALL SINUS CAVITIES
(critical areas of J
EVEH DEtPIH HEAD (
colds infection
DRISTAN Dacongaatant Tablets, working through the bloodstream,
bring dramatic relief from colds miseries, pollen allergies and from
sinus congestion with its tenderness, pressure and pain.
dristan, amazing medical achievement, contains: (1) The scientific
decongestant most prescribed by doctors. In minutes - it reaches
all congested areas even deep in the head . . . quickly shrinks
swollen nasal-sinus membranes . . . promotes drainage . . . restores
free breathing. (2) An exclusive anti-allergen! to block allergic
reactions often associated with colds plus a highly effective com
bination of pain relievers, dristan reduces fever better than aspirin
and promptly relieves body aches due to colds. (3) Vitamin C to
help build up body resistance to colds infection. For quick relief,
get dristan Decongestant Tablets. Note: DRISTAN is being widely
imitated. But the fact is . . . the exclusive dristan Tablet formula
cannot be duplicated. Accept no substitutes !
WHEN COLDS
STRIKE, nasal-sinus
passages become
clotigcd with germ
liulcn mucus .
responsible for so
much colds sutler
ing and misery.
TAKE DRISTAN.
Working through
the bloodstream,
dristan shrinks
oil swollen mem
branes, promotes
drainage, restores
free breathing.
This Exclusive DRISTAN Tablet
Formula Cannot Be Duplicated!
dristan is the exclusive 3
Inycr tablet discovery which
for the first time makes it
possible to unite certain
medically-proven ingredi
ents into one fast-acting
uncoated tablet. Accept no
substitutes!
There's Nothing Like DRISTAN9
Decongestant Tablets
How to Woo a Wife
Don't fluster me with flowers,
Don't prance me out to dinner;
Don't dance with me for hours
Just say you think I'm THINNER.
Betty Billipp
A house divided against itself
should have two television sets.
D. O. Flynn
Billy, age 12, was suddenly smitten with a class
mate, and announced on Friday afternoon that he was
going to phone and ask her to the movies that nigit.
His mother was horrified.
"You don't call a girl in the afternoon and ask her
for a date that night," she said. "It's insulting! You
should call a week ahead of time."
"A week!" Billy exclaimed.
"Well," she said, relenting a bit, "at least not later
than the Monday before your weekend date."
"Monday!" Billy said. "But, Mom, I couldn't ask her
Monday. I didn't even like her until Wednesday!"
Ernest Biennis
What Ever Happened
Dear Mr. Wilcox:
I am answering your letter to Mr.
Owens, our purchasing agent, inquiring
whether we wish at this time to place an
order with you for 1,000 218JJ spindles.
Unfortunately, Mr. Owens is on his annual
vacation and will be spending the next
three weeks skiing in Canada. I apolo
gize for not replying sooner. My regular
secretary, Miss Ellender, is on a Caribbean
cruise, which she always takes this time of
year, and her substitute only recently dis
covered your letter.
Mr. Leonard, our assistant purchasing
to Summer Vacations?
agent, might also have handled this, but he
is currently mountain climbing in Switzer
land. I suggest you write me the middle of
next month, and I may have something for
you. Until then, I shall be away at Lake
Placid, where I intend to take my customary
figure-skating lessons.
Very truly yours,
Parke Cummiugs
P.S. In the future, I would suggest that
where business of major importance is con
cerned, you contact us in July or August
when all our staff is on hand.
A
do I V
". . . ond as little Goldilocks opened her eyes . . ."
Family Weekly, March 5. 1961