Medford mail tribune. (Medford, Or.) 1909-1989, December 13, 1959, Image 42

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    MAIL TRIBUNE, Medford, Or.
I Sunday, Dec. 13, If 59
Family
Council
NO MONEY DOWN . . 1st PAYHENtOeDDUARY 1960
Dorothy g. My lather em
barrassed me in Dublic.
Mrs. L. S-W had to check
10
' '
up on her.
Dorothy S. - I am IS, doing
well in school and I'm pretty
nonular. so I'd be ouite haDDV
if only my parents would quit
being so old-fashioned. They
just don t realize we re living
in the middle of the twentieth
century. '
My parents told me they
didn't want me to go out any
more with a certain boy. He
happens to be the one I like
best. They fust wouldn t listen
to reason. He is really a won
derful guy, but they didn't
give him a chance to show his
real self.
Anyway, I went ahead and
made a date with him. My
father trailed me and then
made a scene in the street.
embarrassing me in front of
everyone. Im ashamed to
show my face outside of the
house now. Was that the right
thing for a parent to do?
- Mr. L.S. I didn't want
my husband to make a scene
and 'embarrass Dorothy, but
something had to be done and
that was the only way to do
it.
We suspected Dorothy was
disobeying us and had made
another date with this boy.
She looked very guilty and
we had heard her whispering
on the telephone. There was
only one way we could be
sure and that was checking up.
This boy brought Dorothy
home from a date an hour
and a half late. When we
gave him a good talking-to,
he just stood there with a
smirk on his face. He is not
a good-looking boy and cer
tainly not well - spoken. We
can't understand what Doro
thy sees in him when she
could have a lot of dates with
much nicer boys.
The Council: In general, we
are opposed to parents spying
or snooping on adolescent
children. They must have a
measure of privacy, but in
this case we think the father's
action constituted legitimate
checking up. More parents
may well do this kind of
checking up when children
behave suspiciously.
Dorothy was all wrong and
she knows very well that she
. brought this public embarrass
: ment on herself. She proved
herself untrustworthy and has
no right to a beef simply be
cause she was found out.
Because it is usually quite
difficult to check up on ado-.-
lescent children, parents must
sometimes bend backwards a
bit in their effort to create the
atmosphere of sympathy and
understanding that is essen
tial if they are to trust their
children. Perhaps Dorothy's
parents might have considered
giving her one more chance to
date this boy if he came for
ward with a satisfactory ex
planation and apology for the
first late date.
If adolescent boys or girls
have a chance to be heard and
get a reasonable amount of
understanding from parents,
it is more likely they will ac
cept restrictions in the right
spirit. We wouldn't outlaw
"checking up," but it is cer
tainly a far less effective
method of control than secur
ing the child's own recogni
' tion and acceptance of right
and wrong behavior.
(Copyright 1959. General
Features Corp.)
fey Roads Cause Death
Of Albany Woman
Oakridge - (UPD - Icy roads
were blamed for the death
of an Albany -woman Thurs
day when her station wagon
crashed over a 35-foot em
bankment. Four other persons
were injured.
The victim was identified
as Mrs. Norma Jeanne Nec
cum, 26. Injured in the crash
were her husband, John Os
good Neccum, 28, his sister,
Thelma Ann, 15; and their
two children, Johnny, 5, and
Carolyn 1.
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