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About Medford mail tribune. (Medford, Or.) 1909-1989 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 5, 1958)
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It was the opening of the foot ball season, and most of the 70,000 fans had come to see the sen sational sophomore halfback who had been such a hero in his small town high school. The young man was determined to prove he could be as great in college ball as he had been back home, and he eagerly awaited his first play. When the quarterback called on him, it was for a slashing run through tackle and guard. The fleet-footed youth took the hand off and dashed at the opposing team. Two mammoth linemen suddenly rose to block his path. There was a heavy thud, and blackness closed in on the pro strate halfback. When he opened his eyes, he saw the vast stadium and the great mass of spectators. "Gosh," he sighed, "how did all those people get back to their seats so darn fast!" Dear Mexican Tourist Bureau "Senores" and "Sefioras" Prove an optical illusion; A clear-cut "Men" and "Women" Would save untold confusion. Annie Laurie Von Tungeln My Son, My Hot-Rodder Life is not a cylinder head, Or a shining filter dome. What I'm getting at is this: All that glitters isn't chrome, Francis O. Walsh An old-timer is a guy who remembers when a girl didn't care whether a spinning wheel had whitewall tires or not. Bert Kruse in Quote Nothing is harder on a woman's clothes than another woman. Lion , w I Vf-".1' 1 "I sleep like a baby! Wake up at 2:30 every morning, bawling my eyes out!" O It's generally agreed that when it conies to apt descriptions, it's tough to beat a kid. Like the youngster with a new puppy who was asked what kind of a dog it was. "He's mixed up," was the reply. "Sort of a cocker scandal." And then there was the teacher who asked a pupil to describe "nothing." The kid had no trouble. "That's a balloon with its skin off," he explained. Smile, Pardner, Smile! My friend, Tex, has been moping ever since learning that Alaska will become the largest star in rh TTni big as Texas. He's so demoralized, he let mp nav mv half nf the luncheon tab last week. Come on, Tex, cheer up Like the Alamo, remember this: ill There are more vrettv airls in Terns thnn .S Alaska why not, with 9,000,000 folks in the Lone Star State and only 200,000 in Alaska! o TV Texas Westerns far outnumber Alas kan Northerns. Alaska lias yet to produce a dame who got as much publicity as Texas Guinan. T Nobody, but nobody, tells jokes about Alaskan V J millionaires. 5) leXal , a, cinc?l o 9et a major-league uiiaemiu cmo oejore Alaska. Try to nickname an Alaskan for his state, the way they do Tex for Texans. What do you get? Alas! Who wants a handle like thaf Cimptitt Sspramt Kit shwm . . . $14.95 On sal at drug, department ond hordware ttofts Quit watering that dust with tears, Tex. It's not as rough Parke Cummings Family Weekly. October S. I95i