Wntrr llnnl.
Cliolly ITow do yon think I look wltl
my niitumobilo goggles?
MIhs CnpHlciim I mippoHo yon " oo
through tlicm, jimt n If they were ordi
nary kIumch. Don't .von?
Tlint Srpreil Kci-llnir.
I?ool1ily Did you evr suffer
tngo fright?
from
OarrirkBon No ; but jnany a time,
wlion I've looked through the peephole
and noted tho kzb of the audience, 1 have
suffered severely from hox-olllce fright.
What Nee.lt
"Georgle, what li your father's occupa
tion?" "Ill what, ma'am?"
"Hii occupation. What docg he do for
i. living?"
"Do? Fur a llvln', ma'am? Gee 1 He's
t plain clo'es p'lceceman wit' a pull I"
Leaves the Holes.
The Gourmet I tell you, I certainly
Bm fond of Swiss cheese sandwiches.
The Dyspeptic Oh, that's the cheese
with the boles In It . Very Indigesti
ble. The Gourmet They are, eh? Well,
I never eat them. Philadelphia Ledger.
How It Struck II Ira.
Mrs. Suhurhs (with paper) I see
that the site of tho Garden of Eden has
at lust been located.
Mr. Suburbs Yes? When will the
ale of lots take place and what's the
fare from the city hall? Puck.
PRUSSIAN
COUCH (DISTEMPER CWK
Cam Courh. Dlitcmpcr. all Tkroat
and i.ung Trouble. I'urlAM the blood
I'uU the animal In condition. Mc.
I'mtslun Remedy Co, Bt. Panl. Minn
MY DEAR FRIEND
THIS
MEANS
YOU
Cnnaldor tho pontage stamp; It unefulness
Ilea in iu ability to slick to one thing till
It geta Hi ere. Write lor particular.
528 Lumber Exchange, Portland, Oregon
HIT OUT OF THE RUT
I am designer of book, magazine and
catalogue covera. bimlnena cards, letter
head", bill heads and advertising cuts; can
inako the print of your Btore look entirely dif
ferent by removing poles, etc., from print.
CHARLES SCHRAM
Morrison St. PORTLAND, OREGON
Jl U-llil -
iM:ii;i;iitt'i;i.yi
FREE LOT AT OCEANSIDE
(North Beach) and Beautiful Oak Book
Case to every purchaser of the Special Edi
tion of the "Library of the World's Best
Literature," 46 volumes, ailk bound, (2.10 per
Volume: 5on delivery of set and 5 per month;
case and books delivered free. Particulars by
writing j. p, MILLAR & CO..
Columbia Bldg., Portland, Ore.
CLASSIFIEDADVERTISING
Portland Trade Directory
Names and Addresses in Portland of Repre
sentative Business firms.
CBKAU 8KP ABATORS-Wo guarantee the U.S.
beparator to be the beet. Write lor free catalog,
llamlwood Co., Fifth and Oak.
PIANOS A ORGANS Many line Instruments re
vert to ns account sickness or removal of buyer
Write for description of pianos now on hand,
terms, eta. Write today. Ullbert Co., Portland
P. N. U.
No. 46-06
w
HEN writing to advertisers please
mention tu is paper
Inn
mm
FREE IRRIGATED LANDS
In Central Oregon, at Cost of Reclamation
THE DESCHUTES IRRIGATION & POWER CO.
v Under the Carey Act hat 75,000 acres
now ' under" water.
210 MILES OF WATER LINES
1.8 feet every ninety days over
foot over each 100 acre available to each purchaser at actual ''
coat of irrigation. Payment
in three equal annual payments at 6 per cent Maintenance
o. X
charge, $1 per acre per annum for each irrigable acre for
water. PRODUCTIVENESS PROVEN BY GOVERN
Ch. MF.NT EXPERIMENTAL STATION k. .-...-I
V "a. Qt- y v. - '
V7 settler on the land, 30,000 acres having been sold.
V$$& DESCHUTES IRRIGATION AND
:ff rOWcK tUMPANl
6,1 McKay BId" Port,and' 0rcM
Office fr sale tf land, lex A, letaue,
AA X Creek CenMy.ertlu
PE:RU-NA
FOR
CATARRH
Head throat
1 UlKGSSIOMACIM
f and;
Judge and Jaror.
Judge Adams, the County Court
Judge of Limerick, Is one of the wit
tiest of Irishmen, but occasionally from
an encounter be emerges second best
The other day a Juror asked to be
excused from serving on account of
deafness.
"Were you In court during my charge
to the jury In the last case?" asked the
Judge.
"Yes, yer bonner," replied the Juror.
"Did you hear it?"
"Yes, yer honnor, I heard every
word of It, but I couldn't make any
slnse of it!"
The reply evoked a roar of laughter,
in which Judge Adams heartily joined.
But he did not excuse that Juror.
Look but Do Not Touch.
"lias your wife got your den fixed tip
yet?"
"Yes, and you ought to sea it It's
the coziest place In the whole bouse."
"I suppose you find great comfort to
It, don't you?"
"Oh,, she won't let me go in It It's
merely to. look at" Milwaukee Senti
nel. First Appearance.
"Who are you, sir?" asked Ere, is
surprise.
"Madam," answered Adam, with his
most engaging smile, "I am Exhibit A of
the ethnological department."
It was then that the serpent, having
escaped from the zoological department,
entered upon the scene, and the real trou
ble began.
each irrigable acre, or one second
on land: One-fourth cash; balance
'I
1 it T.'M I III! aaa I
Cream Caramel.
Moisten two cups of granulated
sugar with enough, milk to dissolve It
and a quarter of a teaspoonful of
cream of tartar and put Into a sauce
pan. Set where the contents will sim
mer gently. Stir all tho time untlj a
little dropped Into cold water is about
as stiff as putty,' Pour Into a shallow
pan, set aside until so stiff that the
pressure of the finger leaves a dent on
the candy arid the dent remains. Work
to a soft mass, kneading It upon a
powdered sugar-strewed board. Roll
out Into a sheet and cut Into squares.
You may add vanilla If you wish Just
before taking from the Are.
Chentnnt Croquette.
Take two cupfuls of large chestnuts,
sort carefully, and, after shelling and
boiling, skin and rub through a colan
der. Mix iu with them well a, table
spoonful of butter, a pinch of salt, an
other of paprika, and a few drops of
lemon Juice; then pluce in a double
saucepan and heat. After setting aside
until cool, form the chestnuts Into cro
quettes, roll in egg and then In cracker
dust as in the case of ordinary cro
quettes, and set In the refrigerator for
an hour until time to fry them In a
deep pan of fat, which should be boil
ing before the croquettes are placed
In It
Oyater 8alad.
Scald oysters until they are plump,
and then put them In cold water while
they are boiling hot, so as to make
them firm; put them to one side and
boil five eggs hard ; take off the whites
and chop fine ; lay a bed of white let
tuce In a long dish ; place the oysters
In this ; cover them with a mayonnaise
dressing; over them place the yolks of
the eggs, which have been mashed fine,
and lastly the chopped whites of the
eggs. Do not let It Btand long before
serving. If you do the oysters and
mayonnaise will become watery. Be
sure the lettuce is thoroughly dried.
Fried Tomatoes with Green Gravy.
Cut tomatoes which are not too rlDe
In inch slices, dust with salt, pepper
ana flour ; brown quickly on both sides
In hot butter, then pour over them
thin cream to nearly cover, and slm
mer five minutes. Lift the slices care
fully on a platter, and thicken the
gravy with the beaten yolk of an egg
stirred into a half cup of cold cream
or rvch milk ; do not let It auite boil
pour over the tomatoes as soon as It
thickens and serve hot This la a favor
itedleb.
Flckled Oyatera.
Simmer about 200 oysters In their
own liquor for five minutes, drain them
well and place in Jars, pourlnz off from
time to time any liquid that may ac
cumulate. Flace on the fire In a sauce
pan one quart of cider vlneear. hnlf an
ounce each of whole cloves and pound
ed mace, a level teaspoon of salt, a
saltspoon of cayenne pepper and a ta
blespoon of white mustard seed. Boll
three minutes, then cool and pour over
the oysters.
Cold Catanp.
One and a half pints of vinegar, one
half teacup salt, one-half cup grated
horseradish, two teaspoonfuls black
pepper, one-half cup of mustard seed,
two green peppers, two onions chopped
fine, one teaspoonful celery seed, one
teaspoonful cloves, two teaspoonfuls of
cinnamon, one cup sugar, one peck ripe
tomatoes chopped fine ; remove all seeds
and Juice. Put all in tha vinrr nrui
tal In Jan or cans.
Cora pi,.
Cot the kernels from ears as for
tttwtaf. Make a rich pie paste, line
a oeep baking dish with it
pW and put Into it alternate layers of
cut corn and little blocks of dough.
Dot each layer with bits of butter and
to cover all with a very
liberal quantity of milk. Put on a top
eorer of pastry and bake until a rich
brown. s
Pollah Bonlllon of Beet.
Chop two bunches of beeta fw v..
with two quarts of cold water on hn
for two hours. Strain, put in two table-
Bpoonruis or vinegar, one-half table
spoonful of sugar and one tfiminnnnfni
of salt Set aside to cool. Beat one
egg witn one-fourth pint of cream.
When the soup is cold Dour tho on
cream inlitafe into It and serve.
Quick1 Mnfflaa.
Sift two cups of flour with a
tablespoon of sugar, two level teaspoons
of baking powder and. a saltspoon of
salt Beat two eew. add
milk. Rub one level teaspoon each, of
lard and bntter Into the flour and pour
In the egg and milk. Beat and bake in
well-greased muffin tins.
Have You
a Friend?
Then tell him about Ayer's
Cherry Pectoral. Tell him
how it cured your hard cough.
Tell him why you always keep
it in the house. Tell him to
ask his doctor about it. Doc-1
- -ie I
tors use a great ueai or 11 tor
throat and lung troubles.
"I had a terrible cold and cough and waa
threatened with pneumonia. I tried Ayer'a
Cherry Pectoral and It m me quick and per
fect relief. It U certainly a most wonderful
couth medicine. "-Kaa A E. Whitmam, Bloui
rIli, 8. Dak.
MmAm by J. 0. Ayer Co., Lowell, Mam.
naDOXeM.U7ri 01
7. SABSAPARIUA.
uers
PILLS.
HAIR VIOOR.
One of Ayer's Pills at bedtime will
hasten recovery. Cently laxative.
Stretching It.
An American visiting Dublin told
some startling stories about the height
of some of the New York buildings.
An Irishman who was listening stood
It us long as be could, and then que
ried :
"Ye haven't seen our newest hotel,
have ye?".
The American thought not
"Well," said the Irishman, "it's so
tall that we had to put the two top
6torles on hinges."
"What for?" asked the American.
"So we could let 'em down till the
moon went by," said Pat
ner Olroree Portloa.
"Mrs. Jones Just got a divorce from
her husband for throwing salad in her
face," said one.
"Did she get alimony?" asked the
other.
"No," replied the first "She got the
salad." New York Press.
Hotel and restaurant prices aro
steadily rising In German cities, be
cause of the rapid rise of prices of
meat and vegetables. Cooks and wait
ers also demand much more than for
merly. There ia no satisfaction keener
th&n being dry and comfortable
when out in the hardest tornv
YOUA5E50MOPTHI5
H YOU WEA
fv w -.arr a WW
01LB CLOTHING
tLACK OR YELLOW
CHJAli lYERTWHiRL
il.J. TOWU ,dOSTOM. MASJ.0.S.A.
TOWU (AMMAN CO,UmW.T0t0NI0. CAN.
The pom-pom gun is to supersede the
Maxim tan in the navy.
A&getable Preparationfor As
similating the Food andBegula
ling (he Stomachs andBowels of
Promotes Digestion.Cheerfur
ness and Rest. Contains neither
Opium.Morphine nor Mineral.
Not Narcotic.
jav afou.nrSAMun.mQaR
Pnpli Stmt
jIU.Smn
MfcwJW-
am rams
A perfect Remedy forConsllpa
non, Sour Stomach.Diarrhoea
Worms .Convulsions .Feverish
ness and Loss of Sleep.
Facsimile Signature 6f .
. -NEW-YDPK. '.
Itefltoia iVP-.sua
- exact copy or wbabpcr.
I A
pilBIMilliiliiiiltoiiii Iffl
HI
i
Judicial Acumen.-?
The late Justice Daly of New York
frequently enlivened the tedium of
legal proceedings had before hlni by hist .
kindly wit. ,
One day a suit was brought before
him In which damages were claimed by
reason of an assault. Plaintiff had been
knocked down by the defedant and se
verely pummeled while prostrate. On
of the witnesses seemed very reluctant
to answer the questions put to him on
cross-examination, In which he was up
held by the court.
"With all due respect to your honor,"
complained the attorney for the plain
tiff, "the court does not appear to taka
cognizance of the underlying principle
In this case."
"In my opinion," replied bis honor,
good-naturedly, "the underlying princi
pal In this case Is your client, Mr. At
torney." Harper's Weekly.
Stupid.
"I wish I was half as beautiful as
Miss Brown," remarked the fair Edith
to Mr. Green.
"Well, you are, you know," replied
Green, thoughtlessly.
Then he wondered why she suddenly
rose and left him.
The boatswain's pipe, which has been
displaced in the British navy by bugle
calls, is to be restored to favor.
To Break In New Shoes.
Always shake in Allen's Foot-Ease, a powder.
It cures hot, sweating, aching, swollen feet.
Cures corns, Ingrowing nails and bunions. At
all druggists and shoe stores, 25c. Don't accept
an substitute. Sample mailed FREE. Addresa
Allen S. Olmsted, U Boy, N. Y.
Queen Alexandra's eyes are de6p blue;
and retain the mingled softness and firj
of youth.
Banking by Mail
WE PAY
INTEREST
On eavinga deposits of a dollar
or more, compounded . twice
every year. It is just as easy
to open a Savings Account with
us by Mail as if you lived next
door. Send for our free book
let, "Bank ng by Mail," and
learn full patticulars. Address
Oregon Trust &
Savings Bank
. Portland, Oregon
Sixth and Washington Sts.
For Infants and Children;.
a""aWa--iaaaWaaWa1aB
The Kind You Have
Always Bought:
Bears
Signat
in
Use
For Over
Thirty Years
P
IU
TNI OIMTMIR OMMNV. MVI TOR ITV.
ore Kit
I (ft n (trrfhl