THE HERMISTON HERALD, HERMISTON, OREGON.
Thursday, M ay 27, 1937
U N CO M M O N
A M E R IC A N S
By Elmo
Scott Watson
• W e i le r n
N ew spaper
Union
THE FEATHERHEADS
JUST L O O K A T
T H A T P IL E . O P
SAN D/
Early-Day Dictator
T ONG before M ussolini or Hitler
<seT "EATS
at a my
.
PfcSTAÜßWT
■*—' w ere born, an A m erican gave
a dem onstration of “ how dictators
g et that w a y .” His nam e w as Adol
phus F rederick Hubbard and he w as
lieutenant-governor of the state of
Illinois at the tim e.
In 1825 Gov. Edward Coles notified
the lieutenant - governor that he
would leave the state the next month
and that Hubbard would be responsi
b le for the execu tive duties during
h is ab sen ce which would not exceed
three m onths. But Coles ca m e back
sooner than he had expected.
The lieutenant-governor, however,
w a s so w ell pleased with the job that
h e decided he would like to go on
governing. So he announced that
C oles, by his absence, had “ abdi
ca te d ” and that as lieutenant-gov
ernor, the legal su ccessor to the
governor, he, Hubbard, w as now
th e governor. Coles paid no atten
tion to this but returned to his duties
and w as recognized by all the ex
ecu tive officers as governor.
U ndiscouraged by this fact, Hub
bard issued a com m ission as pay
m a ster general to W. L. D. Ewing
and when the secretary of state
refused to sign it, Ew ing, prompted
thereto by Hubbard, appealed to the
Suprem e court to issue a m andam us
forcing the secretary to sign the
com m ission . The court refused so
Hubbard next appealed to the legis
lature to support him in his claim to
the governorship.
When it ca m e to a vote, only two
legisla to rs cam e out openly for
the “ pretender” and after a while
Hubbard decided to abandon his
plan of becom ing “ governor by
usurpation.”
Later he decided to win that hon
or by m ore legal m ethods ar.d dur
ing the cam paign he m ade a speech
which has becom e a cla ssic in Am
erican political history. He said:
“ F ellow -citizens, I offer m yself as a
candidate before you for the office
of governor. I do not pretend to be
a m an of extraordinary talen ts; nor
do I claim to be equal to Julius
C aesar or Napoleon Bonaparte, nor
y et to be a s great a m an as m y
opponent, Governor Edw ards. N ev
erth eless I think I can govern you
pretty w ell. I do not think it will
require a very extraordinarily sm art
m an to govern you; for to tell the
truth, fellow-citizens, I do not think
you will be very hard to govern,
nohow !”
P. S. He w asn’t elected.
’232
Dirty Crack
.
------B ü 7-r
O N ty A T
SOME
PLACES
DO VO LI
6eT
F ood
•....
By C. M. PAYNE
S*M ATTER POP—These Deteckativs Can Sure Lead You Into a T rap !
T l I e m - / a a i n ' t
z S o l
N O
S U S P IC IO N I, A T 3O U T Ì
N O IS O S V T w in ' NO-nJiH,
T o MdTiO^V
H oofing and Mouthing»
FINNEY OF TH E FORCE
Hopeless
By T e d O lx x w h lia
• By Warten Newafega» Usía.
|>A <SLAD VA
SAID HE
USED tD
SIM Ö-—
Yankee Saint
N E hundred years ago they
looked upon John Humphrey
N oyes as a m adm an, a crank, a
heretic and an im m oralist. But to
day the historians speak of him
a s “ a Yankee sain t,” a “ true
gen iu s” and “ one of the noblest
pioneers A m erica has ever pro
duced ”
Born in Vermont, N oyes w as edu
cated at Dartmouth and prepared
h im self for a career in law. But
the religious fervor which sw ept the
country in the early 1830’s seized
him and he entered Apdover theo
logical sem inary to prepare him self
BRONC
for the m inistry. H owever, after ob
taining his licen se to preach, Noyes
began to rebel against dogm atic and
professional religion.
Becom ing
known for his heresies, his license
w a s taken aw ay from him. Then
he announced he w as going to e s
tablish a kingdom of God on earth
arid he founded the Putney com
m unity in Vermont.
There he put into p ractice his phil
osophy of Christian Comm unism
w hich includea the m ost intim ate
relationships of living. B ecause of
th ese daring experim ents, Noyes
w as
repeatedly
persecuted
b y
groups of reform ers and m ore than
once he narrowly escaped im prison
m ent F inally, he m oved his colony
to Oneida, N. Y„ where it becam e
fam ous for the su ccessfu l industries
it started.
In 1869 N oyes inaugurated anoth
er experim ent which brought down
upon him a fresh storm of protest
from the exponents of traditional
m orality. He called it “ stirpicul-
tu re” which w as nothing m ore than
a program of scientific breeding for
the hum an race long before the
word “ eu gen ics” had been coined
T he resu lts of these experim ents
are said by actuarial exp erts to
be unparalleled in the records of
m odern vital statistics.
In 188! his Oneida com m unity w as
changed to a corporation and by
the tim e of his death five years
later there w as little left of the
original idea of the com m unity but
its nam e. During the next half cen
tury the nam e of John Humphrey
N oyes sank into obscurity. Then his
biography w as written oy a modern
scholar who has d eclared: “ How
ever obvious his d efects rem ain,
John N oyes possessed the attributes
of genius . . . Such a life nas
seem ed far m ore worthy of com
m em oration than m any of those m ore
celebrated, m ore honored by the
nation and the world, yet who never
dared, as N oyes did, to translate
ideals into the reality of livin g.”
vJE L L -O N C E T HE
U S E D T o SIM® ifd
CHURCH— O H /—
O l HEAR H IM
COMIM' N O W /
I"
f iN u e y
HULLQ GURRLY—
OCM
up
ÁLL WASHED
NOW
you’Re (
T b l l ih '
us/
“HOW DR*/
Ol A M " ,
BE WAM
S O N S-
that
A IN 'T
S o <3000
FEfc BATH
TUB TtUOPS
O
By FRED HARMAN
PEELER— Withers’ Decision
---——
———
—— —
————————
—
Hurrah for the Moon
Sam bo had joined a debating so
ciety , and the day after his first
m eeting he was being questioned by
friends.
“ What w as de subject of de de
bate, Sam bo?”
“ De subject w ere, ‘What Is de
Most Benefit to Mankind, de Sun or
de Moon?’ ” replied Sambo.
“ And which side did you take?”
“ De m oon’s ,” said Sambo. "1
argued dat de sun shines by day
w hen w e doan’ need de light, but de
moon shines by night, when dat light
m o s’ certainly am needed. An' dey
couldn't answer dat, su h l” —Tit-Bits
M agazine.
Curse o f Progress
I KEEPING QUIET
o u i* -fc n e t fbcoMt
ON IN, #1« neiHEX-SW i
w y ï ow To be û L irf
By GLUYAS W ILLIAM S
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UPSO ii RB.
Worm Turns
u
Angus w as out for the evening and
when he returned he found his father
w aiting up for him. “ How much did
the evening cost ye, lad?” he asked
at once.
“ Half a dollar."
“ That’s not so bad,’ he said, vis
ibly relieved.
“It w as all she h ad,” the boy ex
plained.
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14 RA’SFP BELOW. M S H
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