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About Gresham outlook. (Gresham, Multnomah County, Or.) 1911-1991 | View Entire Issue (July 17, 1914)
HOME A XD FARM MAGAZINE SECTION AND FARM MAGAZIN J SECTION By Geo. Barr McCutcheon « ’ •»<»<«'<£«>^><§,^<3,3, B E R TA T. A Fool and His Money <3> 13 Copyright, 1913, By Geo. Barr McCutcheon. | • ourad, ’ said I, fixing the ancient enough, Herr Poopendyke. Time enough no more Hohendahls. Icing live the with a stern, compelling gaze, “ this has e h » ” 8eh marts! Conrad invariably p ro gone qiute far enough.” “ W ell,” said I, somewhat feebly noni ced my name with the extra cuis- “ Yes, mein h errf” aonants anil an umlaut. “ where do I come in » ’’ ’ * Bo you serve me, or do you serve All attempts on my part to connect They caught the note o f surrender in the lady in the east w in g»” my voice and pounced npon their op the lady in the east wing with the his “ I d o ,” said he, with a great deal portunity. Before they had finished tory of the extinct Rothhoefens were more wit than I thought he possessed. with me, it was quite thoroughly estab futile. He V oohl not commit himself. “ W ell,” said I, yawning in helpless For a moment I was speechless, but not lished that I was not to come in at all for the reason you may suspect. I was until my neighbor was ready to admit collusion with the sleepy Gretel, “ w eH trying to fix my question and his re me. They convinced me that I was a let it go over till morning. Call me at sponse quite clearly in iny memory so meek, futile suppliant and not the ma« seven, B ritton.” Ccurad made haste to assure me that that I might employ tncin later in the ter of a feudal stronghold. Somehow course o f a conversation between char I was made to feel that if I didi. ’t be the lady would not receive me before acters in my forthcoming novel. have m yself I stood in considerable eleven o ’clock. He begged me to sleep till nine, and to have pleasant dreaina. “ I have been talking with the lady danger o f being turned o ff the place, I went to bed but not to sleep. It waa However, we forced something out of this even in g,” said I. very clear to me that my neighbor was Schmick before his stalwart sons came “ Yes, mein herr; I know ,” said he. tramping up the stairs to rescue him a disturber iu every sense o f the word. “ Oh, you do, eh» Well, w ill you be The old man gave us a touch of inside She wouldn’t let me s'eep. For two good enough to tell me what the devil history concerning 8chloss Rothhoefen hours I tried to get rio o f her, but she is the meaning o f all this two faced, and its erstwhile powerful barons, not filtered into my brain and prodded ray underhanded conduct on your p a rt» ” to minimize in tho least sense the thoughts into the most violent activity. lie lowered his head, closed his thin peculiar prowess of the present Amazon She would 11 't stay put. <i> My principal thoughts had to do with o> lips and fumbled with the hem o f his who held forth tonight in the east wing o> smock iu a significantly snilen manner. and who, I had some reason to suspect, her identity. Boniebow I got it into my -S> It was evident that ho meant to defy was one of the fam ily despite the un head that she was one of the female A me. His sharp little eyes sent a warn m istakable flavor of F ifth Avenue and Rothhoefens, pitiable nonentities if Con <3. rad ’s estimate is to be accepted. A de <3 ing look at G ietel, who instantly ceased Newport. her mutterings and gave over asking About the middle of the nineteenth scendant of one of those girl bearing God to bear witness to something or century the last o f the real baron»— laughters of .he last baron! It sound No tourists enter this place tomor other. She was always dragging in the the powerful, land owning despotic ed very agreeable to my fa n c y ’s v«r, WW W any other d a y ,” I declared, Deity. barons, I mean—eame to the end o f his and I cuddled the hope that my sur firm ly. “ Now. see here, Conrad, I want the four score years and ten, and was laid mise was not altogether preposterous. My original contention that she was ‘ Well, I'd suggest w aiting ju st the truth from you. Who is this woman, away with great pomp and glee by the same, sir,” said he, evidently inspired. and why are you so infernally set upon people of the town across tho river, a poor relation of old Sihmiek and some what dependent upon him for charity— “ Confound them ,” I growled, some shielding her» What crime has she com lie was the last of the Rothhoefens, mitted» Tell me at once, or, by the for he left no male heir. His two daugh to say the least— had been set aside for how absorbing bis presentiment. Lord Harry, out you go tomorrow— all ters had married Austrian noblemen, more reliable convictions. Instead of lie hesitated for a moment near the of yo u .” and neither of them produced a male being dependent upon the Schmicks, she door. “ I am a very old m an,” he whined, descendant. Tho estate, already in a seemed to be in an exalted position “ Will you put in the telephone, sir» ” tw isting his gnarled fingers, a sugges state of financial as well as physical that gave her a great deal more power he asked very respectfully. tion o f tears in his voice. “ My w ife is disintegration, fell into the hand, of | OV*r “ T * Very curiously, I was thinking of it old, mein herr. You must not be cruel. women, and went from bad to worse served her, not me. From time to time at that instant. We have been hero for sixty years. The so rapidly that long before the last quar there occurred to me the thought that “ It really w ouldn’t be a bad idea, old baron— ” ter of the century was fairly begun the iny own position in the household was “ E nough!” I cried resolutely. “ Out castle and the reduced holdings slipped rather an ignoblo one, and that I was Britton, 1 said, startled into com a very weak and incompetent succes D otting m yself. “ Pave us a great deal with it, man. I mean all that I sa y .” away from the Rothhoefens altogether He was still for a tong time, looking and into the control o f the father of sor to baronial privileges, to say noth- o f legging it over town and ail that °/ ,A bli,r"u w,,uld huT! first at the floor and then nt me; fur the Count from whom I purchased the sort of thing, eh » ” had her out of there before you could “ Yes, sir. What I was about to sug five, appealing, uncertain little glances property. The Count’s father, it ap mention half of Jack Robinson, and from which he hoped to derive comfort pears, was a distiller of great wealth gest, sir, is that while w e're nhout it by catching me with a twinkle in my in his day, and a man of action. Dnfor there wouldn't havo been any sleep lost w e might as well have a system o f elec eye. I havo a. stupid, weak w ay of innately he died before he had the 1,°™ trie bells put in. That is to say, sir, in letting a tw inkle appear there even chance to carry out his projects in con ¡lack of bad maimers. both wings o f the castle. Very con when I am trying to be harsh and ncetion with the rehabilitation of (To Be Continued.) venient, sir, you see, for all parties domineering. Britton has noticed it fre Schloss Rothhoefen, even then a de concerned. ” quently, I am sure, and I hink he serted, ramshackle resort for paving Predicament o f a Suffragist. “ I se e ,” said I, impressed, And rather depends upon it. But now I real A well known university profei then repeated it, a little more im ized, if never before, that to betray tourists and a Mecca for antique and who has taken much interest in the picture dealers. pressed after reflection. ‘ I see. You the slightest sign of pcntleness would The new Count—my immediate prede woman'a suffrage movement was per- are a very resourceful fellow , Britton be to forever forfeit my standing as cessor— was not long in dissipating th e|s»ad ed to carry a banner in a parade I am inclined to bounee all o f the master in my own house. Conrad saw great fortune left by his father, the Jt.ha.t WM held in New York some Schmicks. They have known about this no twinkle. He began to weaken. worthy distiller. He ran through with ¡months ago. from the start and have lied like “ Tomorrow, mein herr, tomorrow, the bulk o f his patrimony by the time Dis wife observed him marehing with thieves. B y Jove, she must have an ex ho mumbled, io a final plea. I shook ho was tw enty fiv e and was pretty | a dejected air and carrying his banner traordinary power over them,— or my bead. “ She will explain everything much run down at the heel when he Iso that it hung limply on its standard, claim,— or som ething equally potent. tomorrow, ’ he went on eage-ly. “ I am married in the hope of recouping his land later she reproved him for not mak- N ow I think o f it, she mentioned a sworn to reveal nothing, mein herr. My loat fortune. rag a better appearance. grandfather. That would go to prove w ife, too, and my sons. We may not Tho Schmicks did not. like him. They “ My dear,” meekly replied the pre- sh e's related in some way to some one, speak until she gives the word. Alas! did not approve of him as lord an d p essor, “ did yon sec wbut was on the Wouldn’t it » ” we shall t e turned out to die in our— ” master, nor was it possible for them ¡banner» It read, ‘ Any man can vote, “ I should consider it to be more “ We have been faithful servants to to resign themselves to the fate that ¡Why can't I » ’ ” than likely, sir,” said Britton with a the Rothhoefens for six ty years, had put this young scapegrace into the | p erfectly itraigh t face. He must have sobbed his wife. shoes, so to speak, of the grim old I been sorely tried in the face of my “ And still are, I suspect,” I cried barons Rothhoefen, who whatever else inane maunderings. “ Pardon me, tir, angrily. they may have been in a high handed but w ouldn’t it be a tip to p idea to Ach, mein herr, mein herr!” pro Rort of way were men to th core. This have it out with the Schnucks tonight» tested Conrad, greatly perturbed. pretender, this creature withou* brains Being, sir, as you anticipate a rather “ Where are the keys, you old ras or blood, this sponging reprobate, was | w akeful night, I only make so bold as cal»” 1 demanded so sternly that even not to their liking, i f I am to quote [ to suggest it in the hopes yon may 'ave Poopendyke was startled. ILLUSTRATED 320 PAGED Conrad, who became quit« forceful in I some light on the subject before you Conrad almost resorted to the ex his harangue against the recent order | Tolls all about sex matters; what «lose your eyes. In other words, sir, pediency of grovelling. “ Forgive! foT- o f things. young men and women, young s u e s s as you w o n ’t be altogether in the g iv e !” he groaned. “ I have done only He, his w ife and sons, he ansnred me, ¡and husbands and all others need to dark when morning comes. See wot what w as best ” were full o f rejoicing whoa they ¡know about the sacred laws that gov- ■ c a n t” “ Produce ’ he keys, s ir !” learne3 that the castle had passed from enl 1t!,e ***, iorc#* Flam truths of “ Excellent iden, Britton. W e ’ll have rr«k«_a.ki 1- s k . - j . into mine. r I, I H *31 Hfo -.S in e relation to of haiipisesa “ But not tonight, not ton ig h t,” he fv.nni Count Hohendahl hands . c r e t.“ manhood in mar- and them up in my stu d y .” pleaded. “ She will be very angry. She at least, would pay them the.r wage«. WOmanbood; sexual abuses, social evil, He went o ff to summon my double will not like it, mein herr. Aeh, Gott! and I might, in a pinch, be depended Idiseases, etc. fared servitors, while I wended my way She will drive us out, she w ill shame upon to pension them when they got j Tho latest, moot advanced and com- to the study. There I found Mr. Poopen all! Ach, and she who is so gentle too old to bo o f any use about tho ¡prehensive work that ba« over beea dyke, sound asleep in a great arm and so unhappy and so— so kind to all eestle. ¡issued on sexnal hygiene. Priceless in- ehair, both his mouth and his nose open of us! I—I cannot— I cannot! N o !” At any rate, it seems. I was a d i s * ™ t . o n tor these who are ready for and my first novel also open in his lap '" l *» i|C,e t k 1 « Mr. Poopendyke’s common sense eame tinet improvement over the Count, w h o |l ’ I This book tells nurses, teachers, doe- Conrad and Oretel appeared with in very handily at this eritica! juncture. bad been their master for a dozen very l tors, lawyers, preachers, social work, rs, Britton after an unc mseionable lapse of He counselled me to let the matter rest lean and unprofitable years. Things Bunday school teachers, and all others, tim e, partially dressed and grumbling. until the ic x t morning, when, it was m.ght be expeeted to look op a bit, ¡young and old, what all need to know “ Where are your sons? ” I demanded, reasonable to expect, the lady herself with me at the head o f the honse. Was "*»ont sex matters. By W infield Scott at once suspicious. would explain everything. Further ap it not possibk for a new and mighty Dali, Ph. D., M. D. (Leipzig ) Conrad shook his sparsely covered peal to Schmick was like b ittin g one's race to rise and take the p’aee of the Newspaper Comments: head and mumbled something about bead agains. a stone wall, he said. glorious R tbhoefensf A long lino of “ ’’«’ientif.cally correct ” — ( ’hieage each being his brother's keeper, all of Moreover, Conrad’s loyalty to the lady Meson —- an the t v . pro® ___- I I Tribune. “ Are urate and up i to date. • •'lion 55cn tti artaT w.dK ith me i v A - a. . > : .1 — I Diladelphia Praan. “ Standard book which was Greek to me until Brittoa wx« must 1 ommeailablc. pective root of a thriving fam ily tree! L , know ledge.’’— Philadelphia Ledger. explained that they were not to be Conrad and Gretel beamed on Poopen At least, that it what Conrad said, and The Now York World says: “ Plata found in their customary quarters—that dyke. They thanked him so profound I may be pardoned «eg quoting him. truths for those who need or ought te is to say, in bed. Of course it was quite ly, that I eouldn H help feeling a bit I am tn ly sorry the old raseal put know them for the prevention of evila. •tear to me that my excellent giants sorry for myself, a tyrant without a it into my head. | Dnder plain wrapper for only »1 <MX. were o ff somewhere, serving the inter backbone. But the gist o f the whole matter w«" L ”tr"1* Wf>"e7 IK* t“<e *tn * sets of the bothersome lady in the east “ Jah, ja h !” Conrad cried gladly. this- There are no mor« Rothhoefen«, I m ix m I PUBLISH “ ’® O ls/A N Y W in g . Tomor rev she will explain. Time and Xfun, jod willing, there would , OayuMi Ohio ♦ i K b SY N O P SIS OP PR E V IO U S in sta l lm en ts . <- In the opening instalm ent« o f " A 4» Pool and Hia M oney.” Geo Barr Me- 4>> ^ ¿ he”en * novel, aenal ♦ o h .V a " , w hlch h»’ « heen « p en ally *> Obtained for the Home .n d Farm «•> M a^anne Seetion. we le a n , o f John !■ fa?iy ■rtl* rt. the young man who «> WH» ‘" f - rT H ® h»< J“«‘ « 7 " ? *>u f,r«t " ° novel, »nd at the <* «amo tim e h . , fallen heir to an ini « h 77 .’ 7 “"' Ie,‘ him hy Me 11 3 5 year« o f age t a i..'" L 40 London, Smart <•» A f j ; « 7 ' P °" lhe R i’ rr Danube. «0 A fter fin d in g an old-world town, he •e w era ancient castle, which he Wi.hh*ne " frOID ow"er- tl’e ta le . ,e c r e t* rri Poopendyke, ho ff> ta k e, ta k e , possession Of the im m ense <* ^ h ‘ch *’ , o PP®«ed to be <e> ‘« • " ‘ed only b y the caretaker and ♦ b*a fam ily, the Schmick«. To S m a r ts am asem ent, the first night, he h e a r , ♦ the cry of a baby. I.*ter he d isco v er, ♦ H e ' T “»™'’ !*">, “ *n opp’,r ’ ’ ■«•ow. I to his a ‘“ tc-cateil to attend hl«“ L r ? 7 ponia " c'' “ dnairrd by <s> «1« seeretarv. S m s., a -* ___ ,___ <•> «Olve the m ystery o f the east w ing of O the castle and enters a window by 7 “ .° fa a U dder- H e ¡a blocked by A n o 7 U‘ .door on w h»-1' '• pinned a T note reading: • ‘P lease keep out. T h i, T « private p rop erty.” L ater he m eets 2 a a ere‘“ lj' Pttaalea him. SEXUAL KNOWLEDGE
