Image provided by: Morrow County Museum; Heppner, OR
About The Ione independent. (Ione, Or.) 1916-19?? | View Entire Issue (June 7, 1929)
SUCH IS LIFE Sounds Reasonable
$S By Charles Sughroe
PAP MP MOM AfZB HAMUQ A
ARGOMEW ABOUT WHAT PAP WILL
WEAR 7Z A CHUOGmWHATS
7 DZESS Z "
WHISKERS AND ALL
SU. M .J
rrj i-riTi - nun a ur nit a i sbsbsbbbbbssbsi s-m m mbs tst v r emv . r- iy
i tl. . . - ill nil i i iiL. aii iuvv II tjmi ijmwv ra 'r. lit 11 m 1 1 Tf i
I 1 1 Boat Train to Pari
Waililngton. Modern apecld of
bird flow ovor tli bnrkt of bruits
long lines extinct, for bnck In the let
age, In the marshes and hikes of wtiot
Is now Florida. A grant collection
of bird bones, recently nnenrthed and
not all of them yet received In Wssh
Ington, line boon reported here to the
National Academy of Scloucei by Dr.
WINS BEAUTY CONTEST
MIm Ketlr lllip, a native ot Oker
korn. Grand )uch of l.uiemliurg,
who TitcJ the prattlnt girl at
the beauty pngrant In flalvetton,
Toil, A Jury of artlnts, newnaper
men and movie directors gave her
CIS polnn 11 igalnit 420 for bcr near
By THOMAS ARKLE CLARK
Dill of Ma, Univenity of f
"Where people wlih to attract," sn
Eighteenth century writer, and a wom
an, says, "they
should always be
come with a well
Informed mind, la
to come with nn
Inability of ad
mlnlittcrlng to the
vanity of others,
which a sensible
person would si
w a y a wish to
avoid. A woman,
expeclally. If she
hns the mlifor
tune of knowing anything, ahould con
cent It as well as she can. ... It
will only add Injustice to man that
though, to tne larger and more tri
fling part of the box. Imbecility In fe
males Is a great enchantment of their
personal charms, there Is a portion
of them too reasonable, and too well
Informed tnVmselves, to desire any
thing more In woman than Ignorance."
I should hesitate to mnke sucb a
statement myself, but when t shrewd
and Intelligent woman It responsible
for the Idea I can only find confirma
tion of her opinions In my own experi
ence. This tendency of the Intelligent,
clevor end well Informed to mate with
the Ignorant Is, I believe, not cnnllned
to my own sex. I hive often teen It
"Hornets" Precede Atlantic Fleet
Two of the destroyers of the Atlantic fleet about to pnsi under Mun
battnn bridge when the fleet arrived In New York harbor after Itt nuuuul
tnauouvert Id the Curlbbean.
Fossils of Ice Age Birds ?
Alexander n. Wet more of the Smith
The bones were found not far be
Oflitn the larfnce of the ground, near
the town of Vero, where svniutlonal
fossil finds a few years ago hinted at
the posilbls exlstenct of men on this
continent during the Ice age or toon
after lit clono, Uoat of tha bird bonet,
being dellrnte, were broken, but Doc
tor Wetrnore bat been ahlt to Identify
4H species by a careful examination
of the fragments,
time Blrde There Now,
Must of the birds are of species
that still fly over rtoiida, though a
part of the collection consliti of birds
that have never been seen In the state
In modern times. They were asso
ciated with the bones of extinct mam
mals such as mammoths, tapirs, an-cli-nt
hones and glyptodona or giant
Blnre the bona bed from which they
were taken shows Indications that It
was an ancient marsh, U Is nnturol
Lima. Peru. Reports of the mas
sacre of a numlier of settlers In the
Taplcbe dlitrlct by the Mayorunas In
dlstis recalled here the strange hlitory
of this lllllo known tribe of "white"
aborigines of the northern tributary
of the Amnion river.
Explorert who have braved the trop
ical Jungle to penetrate the Taplcbe
dlntrlrt hive expressed the belief that
the Mayorunas, who live In a clvlllted
state more advanced than their neigh
bors, the Taguas and Tlcunas, are
llluitrsted In women of superior In
tellect. The explanation, I presume
lies In the vsnlty of human beings
and especially In men. Nothing feeds
a man's vanity more than the feeling
of his stiiierlur knowledge. Ask hi in
for Information which he has at hand,
listen to his tale of adventure, his
accounts of bis Investigations, bis
schemes for Improving economic con
ditions or for reorganizing the gov
ernment snd yon finder him st once,
lie begins to think you a person of
unusual InKlght and perception. The
dumb wife la usually a good listener,
and a clever husband Hkee nothing
better than In fill her with useful In
formation. Nothing so Irritates a
vsln, even though he be an Intelligent,
man, than to he corrected In his state
ments of alleged fnrts, to find some
one who knows more thsn he hlmielf
dues nhout the suhlect which he may
be dlscunslng. It Is for this reason
Hint Ignorance often fascinates,
ehnrma, and Intrlgrjea the man of su
perior training and Intelligence.
It It this weakness In man which
led me to as understanding of Rums'
matrimonial bargain, lie wat I band
tome young fellow, both physically
tnd mentally strong, lie was exceed
InKly well Informed not only upon Isw,
whlcb wat his profession, but upon
i half doten other subjects quite re
mote from legal lore, fie must hive
been very vain, for the woman he
married, though well enough looking,
was Intellectually a total lost. I had
never supposed that outalde of I feeble-minded
asylum, any person could
be quite so dumb as an evening's so
cial Intercourse wltb Mrs. Ilurnt
proved her to be. There could have
been no other reason excepting her
Ignorance which hnd charmed lturns.
(A. Illl, WmIm-s Nwippr Union.)
to find many swimming tad wading
birds, sucb as ducks, geese, spoonbills,
herons, grebes, large stork now
known mainly from Boutb America,
and the nearly extinct whooping
Ont of the most Interesting finds
consisted of bones that belonged to a
condor. At present only two speclea
of condor are known, on In the Cal
ifornia moontalna and ont In tha
Andes of Boutb Amerlcsj they sra
the largest blrdt that fly. The Florida
specimen appears to be Identical with
the California condor except that it
was larger. ,
Study Extinct Turkey.
Another extraordinary bone wat a
broken piece of the thank of t long
departed turkey gobbler, with three
spurt Instead of the customary one.
European birds with multiple spurt
have been reported. Doctor Wet more
said, but this It the first Instance on
record of a three-spurred American
Odd Indian Tribe in Peru
direct descendsnta of 8panlih soldiers.
They point out that this section of
South America waa Invaded by Diego
Lopes de Agulrre wltb CapL Pedro de
"UP IN THE AIR"
He's quite "uppish Is Beany Lorn
but not quite ss "uppish" ss would
sppear. That la to any, the California
football player does not attain quite
seven feet altitude In the broad Jump,
as he seems to have here. Penny
ought to add 1 few yards to bis puntt
on such training.
Brookljn, N. Y. Sylvester Wulker,
twenty-seven, negro, wat wooing Mist
Hose Redy, also negro. This was
year or more ago and it that time
Miss Redy suffered in accident and as
result her left leg was amputated
it the knee.
Sylvester felt torry for bis girl, par
ticularly torry that now she was no
longer ible to go to plncet with him.
Thereupon he tok $180 out of bit
savings account bought wooden leg
nd presented her with It
Then Miss Redy wit able to go out,
but Sylvester became tusplcloui she
was going out with others than him
self. Recently be left his rooms where
the girl also lived, and returned 1 few
hours Inter. Sure enough, bis sus
picion! were found to be Justified. Mist
How Lizards Chinge
Chameleont and tome llinrdt
have power to change color.
Borne of the cells within their
skin ire filled with yellowish
oil drops, tome cells contain
mall grnnulei which look whltt
from reflecting light md itlll
others contain brown or reddish
pigment Contraction of differ
enl parts ot the skin at the will
of the llinrd causes the differ
ent vein 10 function. ;
(A HI! WMOrn Nraft llnloS I
II f p f
Goes 98 Mile an Hour
Paris. The first steps to cut down
the tedious railroad trip from Cher
bourg to Paris, whlcb tens of thou
sand! of newly arrived Americans are
forced to undergo every year, wat
taken by the French ttate lines, wblcb
ran in experimental train over the
231 milt course In three hoars and
The trial train, drawn by a special
high-powered locomotive and enjoying
the privilege of clear tracks, averaged
TO miles per boar, sometimes attain
ing i speed of OS miles in hour.
Friday It a Bad Day for
nirmlngham, Ala. Birmingham mo
tnrlstt thould gnard agalnit auto
thieves every night, but especially on
Friday nights, Uie police department
here cautions. Becords show more
then twice as many autos are stolen
on Friday nights than any other dur
ing the week. Officials believe the
cars ire used to ran liquor on Satur
day. They ire nsnally found aban
doned on Monday.
Orsus and a company of soldiers more
than 1 century ago.
Physically the kiayorunai closely re
semble the white race, having light
complexions and the men have heavy
beards. The Mayoruna women possess
unusually expressive facet and hand
some figures. The tribe Is corns die
In character, wandering through the
Jungles In search of food.
In former times attacks md depreda
tions by the Mayorunas against set.
tiers ind travelers on the vast Inland
waterways of the upper Amnion trib
utaries were common occurrences.
The Mayorunat made a practice of
waylaying liver travelers on the Tapl
cbe and I'cayall rivers.
When the Peru Bolivian mixed
boundary commission was nsvlgatlng
the Yiravl river, tbe two small boats
whlcb formed the expedition were at
tacked by the Mayorunas, tbe captain,
Juan 8oares Pinto having been mor
tally woonded, and Dr. Manuel Ro
naud y Tat Sol dan to severely wound
ed that I leg amputation was neces
Tolitoi't Daughter It
Bothered by Taxet
Paris. The daughter of the cele
brated Russian writer, Tolstoi, who
lives In a suburb of Paris, has been
having trouble with the government
about her taxes. Recently she sent
ber tax notice to M. Polncare, prime
ndnlster, wltb this mention : "Will you
allow the daughter of Tolstoi to be
Has That Wooden Leg
Redy was not to be seen anywhere.
Until 10 p. m. be watted In Miss
Redy't ipartment Then she returned
with two negro girl friends.
"So," be. said, reproachfully, "yoo
been going out wltb my lalg and with
"What yon gonna do about ItT the
sked, or words to that effect
"Xou gimme that lalg back I"
Story Without Words
This model carries out the beige
shade In the printed blouse, In tbe
trimmings snd on the patent leather
slippers. A tailored bow on tbe In
step la outlined with beige leather
wblcb empuatlzea tbe trcb of tbe
Girl Suet Her Father for
$10,000 for Whipping Her
Butler, Ma Charging sht suffered
humiliation and nervous shock from
a whipping administered by ber father
after returning from wiener roast.
Miss Chloe Chart, twenty-two, daugh
ter of a farmer. Died a $10,000 damage
ult igalnst ber parent here. At an
other result of the whipping the girl's
mother, Mrs. Nellie Ehart, seek!
divorce from tbe father, Bylver V.
Ehart Tbe Ebartt btve been mar
ried 80 years.
More and Better Play
It Child Health Plea
New York. A nation-wide cam
paign for more and better play, spon
sored by the Playground and Recrea
tion Association ot America, was the
chief feature of this year's observ
ance of child health day, recently,
Mrs. Aids de Acosta Breckinridge,
national chairman of child health day,
A girl may not be
able to keep a se
cret but she can
keep a young man
"I ain't gonna do nothln like that!'
These words led to other words and.
the charge wat later made, when
Walker couldn't get the leg back be
drew out a revolver. Defective! were
called md arrested Walker on charges
of attempted felonious assault snd
violation of tbe Sullivan law, md left
Miss Redy In trlumphint possession
of the wooden leg.
Fsnner Giles from tbe conntrr went
Into a booth to pbone yesterday on blai
visit to town, bnt couldn't get bus
In fact, be couldn't find tbe phone,.
bnt be says be really couldn't get anJ
try about It because when be came
out tbsy binded him strip of phoJ
tograpbt of himself I London Opinion.
LAUGHED IT OFF
"Pa aald my dress was so shocking.
tbit I shouldn't wear It"
'What did yon do tbenT
'Ob, Just laughed It oil."
To spssk of "propsfinda bis"
Th critics de not eM,
Ttr ssr tbs propsr gtnAtr Is
The eos who Uads tbs ihii.
"Why such a burryr
"I btve a terrible lot of work to do
and nobody to belp me."
"What about tbe little girl yoa used
to bsve In tbe officer
"She la not able to work ahy more.
"How Is thatr
"She Is married now?
"Really! To whoml"
Life la Fort Mik
Tbe spoiled son of a rlcb tourist
baa been putting on too many sirs to
"Whit are this, guide r asked the
"A slot machine.''
What la It forr
"For pennies. People deposit them
there to get rid of them," lay Toofus,
TJe bed been hovering near hla
host's daughter all the evening and at
last bis opportunity came.
"Might I ask yoa for the next
dancer be asked.
"Please do," aald the girt Tve
been simply longing to turn yon down
tbe whole evening."
NOT AN ARTIST, BUT DREW
"lie draws wonderfully."
"He looks like an artist"
"But be't an actor, dear."
Aate't Days Are NaiWJ
It won't be long antll a lid
Will civs a laie a pain.
If bs comes wltb a motor ear
lastsat of aa alrplsas.
The Test of KsewlsJge
Mrs. Motherdear 1 must say tbe
longer I live tbe more I realize how
little I know.
Mrs. Multklds I know bow It Is.
The children ire getting old enough to
ask ill klndt of question!.
"Do yoa read all the health htntaF
"Not all," answered Mr. Chuggloa.
"In my efforts to keep out of the hos
pital I limit myself to a study of the)
"Do yoa never repeat yourself In
public utterance?" '
"I do so frequently," answered Sen
ator Sorghum. "Statesmanship has
Its 'sure-fire sniff tame at the vaude
villes." Washington Star.
Trae te tbs Name - '
"Sponger says be It ilwuyt happy
when he It smoking good cigar."
"The trouble with Sponger Is, he ex
pects bis friends to contribute too
much to hit happiness."