A Voicsj That Wants
to Reach Thin, Pale,
Nervous Women
S1cm.-Mr. W. II. Martin of 1930
V. Liberty SI., says! "1 had becomo
II run down in health earned by over
work mil worry, I grew iliiu and pale,
was nervous, weak, had very little
blood and it was thin and impoverished.
( I Rot to weak 1 could scarcely walk.
Finally I began taking Dr. I'irrcr'e
(inlilcti Medical Ducnvrry and il not
only reitored my blood condition but
alio built me up all over. I never knew
there wai a medicine that would build
up a person's health so uuickly and to
permanently ai doc tlie Hjuldcn Medi
cal Uncovcry.' "
Step into any drug itore and ask (or
Dr. I'icrce's (iolden Medical Diicovery
in tablet or liquid: or lend 10c to Dr.
I'iercc'a Invalids' lintel, Buffalo, N. Y,
(or a trial ikg. of tablets.
"Dlvlns Rights"
George K. Huit was known at Divine
Rl(hta Haur berause of a statement In
which he la allogod to have aald: "The
rights and Interests of the laboring
nian will be protected and cared fur
not by the labor agitator, but by the
Chrlatlan men to whom God In Ilia In
finite wisdom baa given the control
of the property Interests of the coun
try." Her Ambition
1 know a very nice woman, and what
do you think her grestost ambition
la? i have heard her say this I It
In her town lives a man named T ut
ile, who thinks be la very good look
ing, and this nice woman longs to ap
proach him, and say: "Tut. I don't
think you are so d n good looking."
-K. V. Howe's Monthly.
Alaskan Schools
There are schools for white children
and for native children In Alaak
Sc hools (or white children are under
the territorial board of education,
while schools for the natives are un
der the direction of the bureau of ed
ucation, and these schools are ecu
ducted for the benefit of adults as
well as for children.
Ended Enforced Servitude
The habit - of sending people to
America to be made Indentured serv
ants was discontinued at the time of
the American revolution. The habit
or sending maidens to become the
wives of colonials was discontinued
the Utter part of the seventeenth cen
tury or the early eighteenth.
Honor Accorded Indian
A Ilattera Indian named Manteo,
who was a faithful friend of the whites
and was taken on a vUlt to England,
waa given t ho lite of Christian bap-
tlam and the order of a feudal baron
as Lord of floanoke August 31, 1DS7.
Judicial Rob at 12,000
The magnificent robes of black satin
damaak, heavily embroidered with
gold thread, which legal etiquette
compels the higher Judicial official In
England to wear on stale occaalons,
now coat nearly $2,000 aploce.
Charge It, Please
Osteopathy moans "the science of
the correct manipulation of the
bones." Think of the edge an osteo
path ha on the rest of us when the
baby needs new pair of shoes.
Knew What He Meant
This telegram was received by the
bride of a civil englnoor who took
only winter flannel to the tropics
with him: "S. O. S. D. V. D. C. O. D.
P. D. Q."
Jewels for Wstchea
The boat grade jewels used as bear
ings In watches are made of sapphires
or rubles.
Glory n Goodness
Great hearts alone understand how
much glory there Is In bolng good.
Mlchelet.
You Want a Good Position
Very wall Talis the Aooountanoy and
Bualnaa Management. Private Hecratart
at, Calmilatur, Cemptomatar, fltenogTa
prie, reiimanehlp, or Commercial Teaoh
era' Coura at
Behnke-Walker
The for moat Business Collage of the
Northwaat which has won mora Aoouracy
Awards and Gold Medals than any othar
school In America. Band for our Buroaaa
CaUlo-. Fourth Street near Morrlaon,
Portland, Or. lanxa M. Walker, Pre.
P. N. U.
No. 22, 1928
GETTING
GROGAN'S
GOAT
By ELIOT KAYS STONE
(tt, till, Wtatern Nmnivir Unlos.)
UFLES muks bltory. The
merest nothing may be sufficient
to change mupa, dynasties, gov.
trnuienta. An adder drenched a
field In blond. A thirty-years' war
was waged over a gins of water. An
empire was loot for lack of a riding
hnlilt. A little wren saved an army
from destruction. A city win de
stroyed by silence. Rome was snved
by some cackling gocsa. The Lily or
Mexico stand where It does today on
account of an eagle and a serpent
Mohammed's life was preserved by a
spider.
It may be suld, then, that a wl
man doe not overlook trifle. In an
other sense, he knows nothing of
trifles, fur everything Is ot Importance.
A fluke of dint can blind a man as
esally as a sledge hammer. The Inalg-
nlllciint mosquito In his small bunting
way I ss deadly as the cobra. All of
which Is by way of preamble to the
plllllng trifle that lost for Grogan the
world's championship.
I'artlsans of Weasel Wavln, now
champion, will tell you Jubilantly that
a left to the ear knocitea out urognn,
the Kama Cyclone. Adherent of
the Cyclone will tell you slmiMt with
Hears In their eyes that nrogun gut
his through a yellow streak. Neither
view Is correct Appearances ars de
ceitful. The hand I quicker than the
eye. Thing that ahow on the surface
are sometimes not there at all. Wnvln
did put Grngaa to sleep, but the
Cyclone let hi in. Grogan did show a
yellow streak all wool aud a yard
wide, apparently. Hut there was no
real knock-out and no real yellow
streak. Grogan fear neither man nor
woman, God nor devil. What laid
Grofiin on the mat was the paltriest
trifle. Jt did not bubble to the ur
face at all Let ua search among the
hidden snd unreveuled events that
really conatltute history and we Shalt
know what knocked out Grogan.
a e e
We ahall now dive Into the sea of
psychology. We shall flah up 1'st Mc
Coy, the Weasel's manager, a little
red haired, blue-eyed aon-ot a gun; as
sly ss a fox. as slippery as an eel, aw
smooth ss your favorite brand packed
Into your pipe, and as crooked as
well, as some aldermen there Is no
better simile. Tat Is out for the cuah.
and he doesn't rare how he geta It
The word psychology Is unknown to
his vocabulary, but be la some py-
rhologlat However, 1 would not ad-
vlse you to Intimate to McCoy that he
Is such a thing, lie would think you
were calling hint names, and that Is a
trifle be never overlook.
Let US now stand aalde and let Tat
prove onr assertions. We shall "listen
In" on a little conversation that he
had with the Wen set a month or so
before the fight We shall find them
both st the Weasel's training quar
ter. W behold the gym, a long, low,
narrow room, bars of everything but
punching bags and other fight p'ira
phrrnalla, and a bench or so along the
wull. Enter McCoy, who for some mo
ments appraises with his keen little
eyes Blsvtn't onslaught on the punch
tng bag.
"I tell yon, Weaael," he begins, as
that athlete paueea for a moment's
breath, "we gotta get his goat."
"lie ain't got none," the Weaael re
torts. "It ld be bettor f fix It"
"Fix h 1 1" McCoy snorts. "Morgan
an' Rockyfeller t'gether ain't got rocks
enough t' frame up nuthlng with that
bunch. Two honest guys Is the Cy
clone sn' his manager. Fools, t call
'em. Why, flrognti'd knock out his
own grandmother If she'd be fool
enough t' step tut the ring sgln him.
''Then you'd better spread our dough
on the Cyclone. I kin lay down If the
Iron boys talk."
"Yon make a noise Itke a bonk.
don't want no short-end bote. We gotta
get hi gont"
"Korglt It The Cyclone dont keep
none o' them little pets."
'8ure, he does," McCoy comes back.
"There never was a guy that didn't
have a goat. Touch me In the ribs an'
I'm ready t' quit Some's afraid o'
snakes, some o mice, an' a futiy long.
legged spider la the answer to one
championship I knows of. Bur he's
got a goat
Which remark proves McCoy to be a
psychologist
An hour or so luter we find McCoy
holding earnest converse with one
Slinky Grimes over a smull table and
a glass of root beer.
"Sure," HI Inky Is snylng, "It's a pipe.
I got puts In the Cyclone's outfit, an'
If he's got a gont, I'll get It If none
o' thorn guys ars hep, I'll find out my'
self. There's a bunch o com-ons at
lus buttln' In, tryln' f get a line on the
champ's form. Til be one o' them
mvself, an' If there's anything In this
gont bis, I'll surs cage the animal."
Let us now Invnde the champion's
training quarters. The room Is very
similar to that In which we found
Slavln. A group of newspnpor men
and fight fnns or eagerly watching
the morning's work. The Cyclone I
having a bout with Tim Murphy, one
of his sparring partners. The blows
full thick and fust on Tim's chest
and shoulder and head. He seems un.
able to elude the Cyclone's sclentlflcnl
ly delivered punches. Suddenly the
champion starts and stares, a look
of fright displaces his confident and
aggressive air, and uncovered, a blow
from Murphy fells hi in to the floor.
The spectators are astonished. Few
of them huve noticed the cause of
Grogan' dlscoiuforture. I did. A good
reporter has to see, even If he Is not
permitted to record everything. That
la, perhaps, the reuson why I have
ferreted out the story of Groguu's,
defeat. It may also explain the rea
son why I cleaned up i-uougli money
on the fight to retire from puperdom.
W shall let Slinky again speak
for himself to McCoy.
"Sure," he la snylng, '"T'was a cinch.
I've lifted his goat. Wuniln see the
beustf" and he places a mall, green
object In McCoy's outstretched hand.
Twenty-two rounds of the (Jrognn-
Klnvln fight were a classic a pugil
istic drums, Never In the history of
the ring had there been auch a but
tle. It was a whirlwind of quick ac
tion. Grognn, the Kansas Cyclone, 198
pounds stripped, lean and sinewy, In
perfect fighting trim, was at his beat.
Sluvln, twelve pounds lighter, well
deserved his nickname. He was, er-
hnpa, the speediest performer ever
admitted to the roped arena.
The first sis rounds were more or
lees of a skirmish, each guuglng the
other. In the seventh, Grogan took
the aggressive. All that saved Weasel
In the fifteenth was his agility; In the
eighteenth, the gong. From then on
to the twenty-third I huve never seen
such an exhibition of gomeness. Slsv
In wss almost literally bnttered to a
pulp.Jn that twenty-second round
the referee hud readied the count .of
nine when the gong sounded.
Tti gtng dunged again and the
cyclone ruahed like a whirlwind to
meet his opponent, who grogglly reeled
from his corner. A gasp ran through
the crowd they were keyed for the
knockout. Then Just before they en
countered, the Cyclone fluled to a
gentle sephyr. lie seemed to be In a
dale and a look of fenr crept Into
his face. There were the thumps of
two blows delivered so rapidly thnt
they sounded almost as one. The
weasel had hurled his right Into Gro-
gnn's Solar-plexus, and deposited hi
left on the baas of Grogan'l right
ear. Grogan dropped like a log and
remained uninterested In the subse-
quent proceedings long after be bad
been counted out
A slgb stirred the house, snd then
pandemonium reigned. Cheers and
hisses and groans, shouts of triumph
aud of anger were confusedly Inter
mingled. Grognn bad unexpectedly
developed a yellow atreak. There
were not a few who loudly proclaimed
It a frame-up! A riot was started
only by the sudden appearance of the
police In force their timely entrance
giving color to the charge. The crowd
duttered sullenly. Such waa the fight
as It went down In history.
What really happened In that twen
ty-thlrd round was this: When the
Weasel had retired to bis corner at
the end of the twenty-semnd, he whis
pered Into McCoy's ear. "Get his goat
I'm all In." So, when at the tap of
ths gong, the Cyclone advanced.
veritable whirlwind, McCoy and I,
alone of the thousands of spectators,
watched a toad a common, ordinary,
garden variety of hop-toad, hopping
toward Grogan. Grogan saw It and
that wa euough. It waa Grogan'
goat the one thing between earth and
aky that the Cyclone feared.
Palm Branch Guards
illage in Guiana
An aming-pau a barrier against
bad Dhantom hnngs across the
mouth of every Huahnegro psth In
the Interior of Surinam. Dutch
Gulnna.
The utility of the thing Is Impor
tant Its form simple. An asung-puu
Is nothing but a long palm branch
with hanging leaves supported across
the way by two long forked sticks
stuck In the ground at either ertrem-
Ity. To go up the path toward the
village that hide up the rise of land,
one must walk through and under the
nsung-puu. letting Its rattling fronds
brush against the face. A stranger
who attempts to mnke his way around
the end of the barrier Is loudly called
back and made to wulk straight
through, legitimately.
The theory, based on actual exie
rlence, Is that no one who comes to
the town on an unholy mission will
venture bodily through the asung.
pan. Fenr of ths avenging fetish that
protects the path will prevent Tho
same rule that applies to the living
affects the dead. Good spirit can
march through the palm barrier,
Had phantoms cannot
The Ilushnegroes believe thnt the
physlcnl strength of tho evil dead Is
so Inferior to the vigor of the good
thnt the branch which deters the one
will present no obstacle to the other.
Thus Is the asnng pnu doubly effec
tive. John W, Vandercook In Harp
er's Magazine.
Married and Impriionad
A marriage was celebrated at a sen
port In Wulcs about fifty years ago
under singular circumstances. The
bridegroom was a returned convict
and was one ot the prisoners sent for
trial at the assises for theft The
bride hod Joined him In his thieving
enterprise, and wn waiting to be
tried. In the morning the happy pair
were escorted by the police to ths
Itomun Catholic chapel, where, In ac
cordance with a Judge's order, they
were mnde man and wife; end Im
mediately afterward they wer ar
raigned before Lord Coleridge In ths
Assises court, and convicted of ths
crjme laid to their charge. The man
was sentenced to five years' penal
servitude, and ths blushing bride wss
relegated to prison for six months.
HEARTS
COURAGEOUS
By DOUGLAS MALLOCH
WHO are your heroes? Though the
brave
Deserve the tribute of the free,
I'm surs not all ths banners wave
Above the ranks of chivalry.
For some no banner wave at all;
And yet some heroes I recall
With hearts courageous, though no
scrolls
fay tribute to their fighting souls.
( know a woman, one who Had
Husband aud bouse, and wealth and
eose,
Yes, all the thing that make you glad
Who know the Joy of tilings Ilk
these ;
And then she lost them, one by one;
they slipped away as slips the sun.
Until she stood as stands the lone
Old oak when all ths birds have
flown.
As stands the oak I For still shs stood,
tier root In earth, ber bead In
heaven,
And epoke of life a something good.
And thought of grief as something
given.
However hard ber hardest mils,
She wore for poverty a smile,
And talked of God In all her grief
With stronger faith and mors belief.
And I, who have my petty loss.
Seek not new courage In old tales;
I ses a woman with a cross,
Yet one whose laughter never fulls.
Who are your heroes? Yao who resd
The story of some stranger's deed.
May seek the brave In tales of war
While some great soul imlles on
next door.
(A r McCler wewepeper Sradlcate.)
O
3heHotdJfwioqrapher
tytf ulkerjor
T OOK at 'em imuklngl" said th
- tlollan ftatiw-flva with Hlanrw
provaL
"I see 'em every day, drop Into the
lobhy hers to puff a coffin tack," an
swered the Hotel Stenographer, glanc
ing at three girls In a big dltan In
I'encork Alley. "I don't mind 'em. Kelly,
bersuss I know It Is not their fsulL
"I do not smoke, though I do not de
serve any particular credit for being
one of the few who do not We are
all the result of our boms training.
ThoM girls live In families where fa
tbers and mothers play twenty five
rent limit, and both side of th fam
ily carry a ctgarett case. Of course
they imoke. Youngster Imitate
their parents from the time they plsy
house, and dress up to their parents'
clothes to do IL
"I come from a family where fa
ther still drinks bis coffee out of a
mustache cup.
"My mother Is religious, too, and
her children are all hand-spanked. I
am past twenty one, but not past
spanking, and If I lit one ot those
thing In our flat, I know what would
happen to me, although I would not
be In a position to see IL Ws still
put all the dinner on the table at one
time abd say grace, so I would hardly
be expected to smoke.
"A the lad said, when her daugh
ter fell In the well. It Is mighty hard
to raise a daughter, but most of ns
Imitate our mothers and make a few
Improvements on ths model, and let
It go at that
(CoprrKht r the MeNaushl Sjrsdloale, laa.)
eoTIbi
BDREVIATED
J l.STORY
WORLD HER HUSBAND
Chapter L
Oil three duys and nights Med-
X mont Spray was all action, fores-
fulness and euthuslasin, not to say
pep.
The Idea had come to him to re
furbish his fishing tackle, to make tt
gleuui like new und shine like the
deuce, and every spare second and
every loose moment he was shining.
pointing, nickeling, scruplug aud pol
lnhlng.
He arose at five In the morning to
get In a few extra rubs before break
fasL He hurried home from the of
flee to shine and scrub before (upper,
und after supper he stayed up scour
lug and palming till the smull hours
of the morning.
Chapter IL
"Piedmont," said Mrs. ftprny timid
ly, "I wonder If you'd mind fixing the
kitchen shade for me? I'm surs tt
wouldn't take you mors thun a min
ute, or an hour at ths most."
. riedtnont Spray drew himself up to
his full height and expnnslon, und his
eyes blazed with honour Indignation
"rra a business man not a car
penter or a mechanic," he withered.
"When I come home for peace and
quletneas, thoroughly exhausted by
the day's toll by whut am I greeted)
By a soothing and comforting sjm
. puthyT No I Ity a cold-blooded de
mand that I spend the night hopping
on and off kitchen tables. Ko, madam,
by ths Lord Harry, no I I"
Ml Ueerse atetthew Adejaatt
PHPTI A lin
VyiV I LuJtXiU
Children, 10 cents Any Time.
Continuous 1 to 1 1 p.
ALL WORK GUARANTEED
Dundee Auto Repair & Machine Works
The Oldtet and Beat Equipped Repair Plant In Oregon
Eaat Watar and Halmim His., Portland, Oregon East 8J1J
;VLINDSR GRINDING CRANK SHAFT GRINDING GEN. OVERHAULING
SEASIDE HOTEL
DROP
IN-
FOLKS!
IRELAND'S SANDWICH SHOP
Boi Lanchet to lake out 25c and 35c
THKkK S A Dim.Kt.Ntg
12S Slilh Mroet PORTLAND, or MS Wuhlntloa Rtreet.
L Cafeteria
Best Horse Collar
Made I
All long rye straw stuffed.
Insist on having thr collar
with th "Flah" Label. If
your dealer does not handle
Inla brand collar, writ to ua
direct
f. SHARKEY A ON
M Union Av., Portland, Or.
Jspsn Lsads Flsrt Eater.
Japan leads in the consumption ot
fish per capita per annum. There It Is
about 200 pounds per person, per year.
while In England, also a big fisb-eat-Ing
country, It Is 4S to CO pounds per
person a year. In Canada, where fish
ing Is a big Industry, the consumption
la about 25 pounds per person a year.
Ws All Make Thsm.
Among ths regulations ot ths West
Boston Bridge corporation, drawn np
by two eminent Boston lawyers, Is a
ectlon which was written, accepted,
and now stands thus: "And ths said
oroDrictors shall meet annually on the
first Tuesday ot June, providing the
aame does not fall on Sunday.
Perfumery Used for Ages.
All civilised people have used per
fumes In one way or another, though
on ot the first uses was In the fu
neral rites. In ancient days perfum
ery was much more nsed than now
and there were many ceremonies that
were sacred in nature that called for
ths fine odors.
His Counter-Charge.
'She need to peel onions just be
fore I arrived home at night so tbat
I would think she was crying and then
I would buy ber a new hat or dress,
was the testimony ot a man In court
In London, England, In answer to bis
wife's divorce suit charging bun with
neglect
Normalcy In Headgear.
A young man bas written a correct
dress department to ask what kind
of hat a bridegroom should wear on
his honeymoon. It the young man In
tends to wear It afterward also, any
bat three aises too small at the time
ot the wedding will do. Arkansas
Gazette.
Deep and Hot
Pagusa springs, In Colorado, the
largest ot like temperature In the
world, have been fathomed to a depth
of 850 feet and bottom never reached.
The temperature ot the water is 15S
degrees Fahrenheit.
Giving Himself Away
Honesty that needs to be labeled is
ot a somewhat doubtful variety, and
the man who is continually asserting
that he Is "as good aa anybody" Is
thereby acknowledging his secret mis
givings. Moosehtad Laks
Moosehead lake. In Maine, Is one of
the largest bodies ot fresh water en
tirely within the borders ot any state
In the United States.
Much Discussed, st Lesst
While the younger generation may
not be going to the dogs. It is beyond
question a bone of contention. liar
rlsburg Telegraph.
Not Psnn's Idea
The plan to pay the Indians for land
taken by the Quakers did not origi
nate with Penn, but with the bishop
of London.
NORTONIA HOTEL
Tea W1U reel Rifht at Home Hera
Si5 S I Safc al Cenl-taaaUi Iihe.
EzoalWat Oafs. Bpedal Weekly
Rate. Hut Meat all Train. 11th and Stark.
PORTLAND, OREGON
PALACE HOTEL
44 Washington St., Car. 1lth St.
Rarneallv solicits vour Datronac. You
will bav all th comforts f your own
bom. Vary raaaoiuibla rata and prompt
aus courteous aarvioa.
oiv u a trial
AUGUST KRATZ Manager
0
L,-,M. J
OFFERS A MARKET
FOR YOUR PRODUCE
VAUDEVILLE PICTURES
Mats.
15c
Eves.
25c
m. Portland, Oregon.
OREGON'S FINEST BEACH RESORT HOTEL
Moderate Rataa. Varied AimMemcnU
TWO COLF UNKS.
SEASIDE. OREGON
Whereto Eat
Is a Treat'
Th Beat Eating- Place In th City- Th Flneet
Coffee and Paltry a Specialty. Reasonsbl
Prlcee. Broadway st Stark (Oregon Hotel
Building). Portland, Oregon.
CUT ROWERS i FLORAL DESIGNS
CUrk Bros, riortsta, Wt lforrlsoa Ct
KODAK FINISHING
FREE FN1.AROKMENT with evary toe
order. Kawllngs Film Co., Portland, Ore.
MARRIFXONELY JSn"Ths
Successful Correspondence Club." Re
liable; Descriptions free. BOX 654,
OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA.
WE BUY
Hides, Pelts, Wool, Mohair.
Tallow, Cascara Bark
Horse Hair.
Send as jrour riii prorata. W mail you chack
tb mam day wa raeain gooda.
Portland Hide a Wool Co.
in ajsaa trusf atiTs, rwTuaa, lea.
Preventlv
- One trouble with calling on com
mon sense to prevent divorces, ths
doggoned stuff might bead oft a lot
ot weddings. Lafayette Journal and
Courier.
Wifulw Walla
"I've been wearing the same hat
for two years" "The gas man called
but I didn't dare give him a check
'cause I didn't know how much ws
bad In the bank" "I've called yon
five times; you're gonna be late tor
work."
Good Friday Held Holiday
Good Friday Is a legal holiday In
Florida, Louisiana, Minnesota and In
Pennsylvania.
England Losing Land
It Is said that 160 square miles ot
excellent corn-growing land in York
shire, England, bas been washed Into
the sea since the writing ot Domesday
book.
BE
The world is a playground
for those who are healthy.
Nature knows the way to
health. Take Barkroot Tonic
Feel Much Improved.
"T have hwn In poor health for Bom
time, ayalrm generally run down and
aufferlria; with eevere ronatlpatlnn. On
rerommrndntlnn 1 tried your Barkroot
Tonic, and anr ualns; two bottles I
began to feel Improved In every way."
1IR8. MINNIE CAMrDELL, Portland.
For Sale by All Druggists
NatureV Own Tonic
I E ft aTUi-
HEALTH IS HAPPINESS
YOU can't be vigorous, alert,
energetic, capable if you are
suffering with Piles or other Rectal or
Colon ailments. Th important nerve
centers affected by such conditions causa
sever reflex complications throughout
th entire system. I will CUARANTEE
IN WRITING to safely and satisfactorily
cure your Pile as I hav done for thou
Soda of others by my faaaoua treatmenr-ar return
your fee. No confinement, hnepi
tal operation or anaeethetk. Send
today for aty new 100-paee Ukie
ttaled book ai facta, met hwhand
ntaUmonlal let ten. tt ta rKhb.
DtAN.M.D.Inc
D OFFICES: SEATTLE OFFICES:
kan BuilVI
lANrj-M
Itllna
Spa-ail Shaw Bull'line.
6VM AND PI N a
MAIN
mm
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fORTLAM
Dr O
OTM