The Ione independent. (Ione, Or.) 1916-19??, July 24, 1925, Image 4

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    HIS MATCH
A taxi driver recently got the wnrat
Of a wordy bout.
Ad olik nmn ':h a wheelbarrow
wouldn't get out of the way, nnd the
taxlmun ihoutcd :
"You ought to tie wheeling a baby
"And you ought to be In It," replied
the rlil iiiiin.
A Busints Getter
A imnll boy cull I on the doctor
one evening. "Say. doc. I guess I got
measles," be said, "hut I can keep It
quiet."
The doctor looked up piixxled.
Aw, get wise, doe," suggested the
mall boy. "Whafll you give me to
go to school and scatter It among nil
the kid?" Bottle.
TRIALS OF WZDDED LIFE
urn
Radio Fnn-Ilave you i loud speaker
In your house? .
Longsuffer Yes, loud and Incessant
I'm sometiiaeg aorry 1 married het.
Supply and Demand.
Supply and demand
Serva lo tielshten tha a loom.
Thera ar alwaya mora problem
Than can consume.
Condition Changed
He You are very extravagant
your drvsa. ,
In
She Before we were married any-
thing that was for me ymi never
thought extravagant, no mutter how
much It cost.
ihSKi 1 nPV" ,ld 'b"Vl
-
Contemplation
"l have heard that you contemplate
retiring to private life."
"the"ame a I contemplate going to
heaven. Iff a sweet anil blissful I
prodiHHt, hut somehow you don't feel
In any particular hurry about IL"
Wasliington Star.
Old, but Ho Fool
She f to old suitor) You know what
people would say that you were fix I
lab enough to let me marry you for
your nmney.
lie 'h. no, my dear; they would
say I was too smart to let you get It
way other Vay.
SHOULD BE TRAINED
Wide I dun't think I approve of
this movement to train young piupla
for marriage.
Ilillihy Wliut! Alu't pivlll.His and
soldiers and all other lighting people
trained?
Publicity
Tii movls actor has to faca
The perils of nubllclty
And sacrlnc, In quest of
'pacs,
Ills marital felicity.
Travel
Homebody The last time I saw the
treat ilr. Uulllrox was In Venice.
Betiuhroad U'wau ! You've .nevfer
teen In Venice.
Homebody I know It, but I've been
to the movies.
Unloaded Year
Nell What else, you may say of her.
Miss Anthony carries her age remark
ably well.
Hell Oh, lf easy enough to curry
one's age by dropping a few birthdays
now and then.
All Right for the Purpose
"Are you painting that scene mrr
UiesV? It doesn't look mm b like It ut
all."
"1 know. Tin doing It for souvenir
Dost-eiirds." .New York Mercury.
The Airplane
The. alrplnns la a ihlna of worth
Bava when compelled to nils,
As It descends from sky to aarth,
la natty politics.
A Good' Time"
To Subscribe
for the Inde
pendent is
-NOW-
CECIL NEWS ITEWS
Mrs. Eiu-I M.iiannndcliiWicr
o! ''Urondactes" were eulliiiK it)
M.-s. Goorjte Krebiut "Hie Lisi
0; np"on Monday.
Miss Grace Ohnndk'r of "Wil
Ov.oreek" ranch spent Monthly
with MifA Annie C. Hynd at "Hut
terby Flats",
Mesrf. Vm. Sexton, Johr.
li ebs. Walter Vvk Jack Hynd
an I Roh Liwwo tnl.ir.o- i.. lb
, . ' .,' ,
rn.uio ui tune vii ounuuy.
Mr. and Mrs. Cecil Liettallen o!
P.-ndleton spent Friday and Sat
urday at "Uutterby Flats".
I .
1 Mr. and Mrs. Archie Had and
son, ot l..tu, were the weekend!
wuests of ilc. t,nd Mrs. Ju'k;
Hnd of "iiutteiby Flats". j
Ky E. Stdenerof '"Seldomseen!
a.vuuipamou vy james rtttrncnii
u uiuiKan, wtrevismnu in I'en-1
U .-ton on Sutioay.
Mrs. Helen Walker, Count:
Siiporiiiteudent of Schools wa
koKing up affair in Cecil oi
T.sday. '
" ,
Facts Aboa; the Telephone
More than half ofth stockliold
eri of the American Telephone
a iJTelcgrhph -company are Wiin
en. Between 600.000 and 700.000
new poles are reqiiirej anntiniiv
to carry tae w! vs of the licllSvi,
.
I. M.
The telephone Directories print
t J every year for the Eell System
require about, thirty thousand tutu
of paper every yeari
iJ..
0ver SOO.OOO
American
"m;lie$ have elephones in
homes.
their
There are 2.2S6 telephone in
strumen i in the Hotel Pcnnsylva
nia in New York City' averajjein
more than 210,000 calls a month.
Care of Gem
A pearl contain carbonate of lime. '
vinegar and other m-I.N will eat away
the polixiieil surface In a sliort time.
I Int water Is fatal to an opal, destroy
Ini: Its fire and sijiiellnies ciniMing It
t craik. Snap Is a dnadly enemy of
the turqu"ie. (
An Ohioan'i Memory
Our memory- gmn back to the time
when people who were exnectliiif
i:i!'.v often hiiM-d it would be a girl, j
on the gmmid that girls gave you so
llltle tnmlile as they grew up. Ohio
State Journal. J
Hey Abtorb Sea Oil
ITay cat on tlie water In the harbor
"f Stockton, f'nl., ubaorlied a thick
i ;,tinti of oil and scum Hint had ac
ci:tii!t;iited there. Tlie hay drifted
imhi.re, was raked to one aide and
burned.
r. f-e i f V1 & rfrWl 57-1
V is e.v rt.-.:'.V?V-v -.Vl'
V - .... .
lips ??;.,---.,r2L
'..lllMe a.
Ifs more fun with a Brozvnie
Making the paddle wheel was 'fun, and
so was making the picture. That's tlie
Brownie's job to get good pictures of
good times.
Drop in and look over the line. Folding
Brownies combine Kodak convenience with
Brownie simplicity. $().(x) up. Brownies of tlic
box type give you pictures the easiest way and at
the smallest cost. $J.ou up.
There's a Brownie
youngster or yourself
Bullard's Pharmacy
The Kodak Filling Station
; MORGAN ITEMS
j Mr. and Mrs. Me Munuv ami
s;i i Nviliit) , of lone, were eulliiiK
Joi.'Mr. and Mra. Hnrbison, Sun-
Mr. Sam S nail came tip f rum
Portland, Stinhiy, to work tir
A fred Tcot'dson during tlx' hal
ve U snison. '
Mr. and Mrs.
dm Hurdesty
uiu i ir. una aus. cat oia
.... I M.. .1 1 t 1i
Me dine '.of
Oicilwenlts lle;'piur' Sunday,
if ctiatilt an cpa spvehilis;.
Mia. Earl Mot-jam and children
wvre ealiinn ot Miv. 11. 0. En
o.i fcridy.
Miss MiidrdWloryun tpeul jSr.if
n.iy Willi her parents at Hr'ou.i
acres,
ii .' "
uosi m i to ini.mrs iuounu-i
! hore have started ! 'irvrstinc.
Mr. anil M'-s. Aluvji i';oi'udon
:tnd L'Yaticc Juiies weite I i Arm,
u'" Su,-li" ' -
.yjr. and Mrs. Henry
Mi-elei
o: ..,.. ,...
trauing n
, ran on Kuiur'lay.
ONl'i MOIiE UN IIE.N'UY
ijve.-ai youuis ur jVo iuio M
.ii one una eav tust wet km
ifd, car which wus wondrinli
4eorutel in various tiroaJ sir.pi
.in eu vetticaliy on the boU
Vt- remaiktd I t,at their tx hi
leiniiiiit'ii t.s ol l he :ut.!.i
Mich Jacob ustd to lu al hi. -
4fl faW when the) WtMMdlM,
t-p lojii'ilie-i' on siiaies. U .
.v IUUri-4 Ituvil p; thai ll t .
' cul I cuet.'i: i.i l.:i ji I i ., .
...e wttu.d iitic i es-ult in a ni i
el. y oi hi:iii!:ir y ti:p, iM '.'.'y '
l (Jui t'L;.l. t, .-, i ci ,e....
iiloii UticuinprilniHii;ik i
cause boys iio not st urcli . ;
iTilttires these tiiim.. We v .h
..ive ! e-:i as c iau uiii.'U.
l we Had uouressed tlu-ni i:i i.
jninai H Sirew or in "Ke.oi an
Eiryptian".
-Cant .-li.ti'.ed.
P. P. C.
He (at window)- Imi'i ll
and his wife al the l'v.i lioir (;.,
tin '.iiil liny were lo l.e ilUnr c:l.
l.ti-ll they are. T;.e ate
miiLlii their pre-si-piirallnii catli.
Higher Variety
"Tbe cur turned teni,.in ami
"Ymi mean It luriieil lurtle."
"Well, rhis was a him priced
chliie.-
'
Nothir.g Exc:!:r
I'otitnliii I n'l get mn
trr:: t -li in g pictures:
. I'enn I'ooh ! Ain't I lie n lelegt
Uri llowera tuenty years?
Well, to Somte, Maybe
The wisest household cures to worn-i-n
jield a liir-e, a useful and a grate
ful field. Ilcnjamin Franklin.
you' lilie for your
at our Kodak counter
FAMOUS VORTS
IN U.S. HISTORY
By ELMO SCOTT WATSON
1. Fired the First Gun in the
III .-olutiort
Contrary to popular opinion, tlie
. cuing gnu of t .0 Keviiliilion whs not
ti .'(l. at Lexington, Muss,, on April III,
1'. To. That honor really belongs 'to
1 ilMiioiith, N. II., where tlie III 1
o i rt net In the W ar for lnilcieiiilenre
ti ii; place, IVi tuber 11, 1ITI.
on l'eceiiilier ,l;i, 1771, 1'inil Hevero,
us yet unkiiewn to funic but ulivudy
act tig as hick- ngei- in the cause of
Anii'l'lcnii llliei'l,, hale potliasui iiilti
I'oHMiaouth to vvatli tlie local com
mittee of pnhl safety flint tleiu'i'ill
t.'iu.e was plain.. ng to relu'oriv I'm I
W illla ll un. I Mjiiy. all alit ii nt l",li. 1
of Moll" In rurtsiuoulli harliot-.
i...v, John .ii.i.t-.a il of !:
ViTC'g uitImiI i I Si 111 WCl'il to t'.c-t.
.'; n t-ochr.iit. . miiii.i i'1'T of l'ii lit: e
.'i.tr.son of 1! voldiers, to be ill
etlc.nl ic.aliHl i : attempt by the cH
"-His lo seli-.i tlie muiiiiioiis in tlie
fort. Accordil ly Cochran In- 'M-tc 1
liuie four-poii. '"rs on the walls '
the foil wlteie an attin k wo.ilil mo t
II!. i iy come iin.l ordi red a sl.urp .e.i
km t that nleb
A'ii;t four i cliirl; the nct iiii.m'ln
n lurty ,of f i cltlT'iis. led t'V Jolin
I . I : t;!i ... laici a t'l.iiior of .New
! I.i -apvhliv, and .Mm Suiilvati. tl ".
t iv .1 for feme . (lie coniie-ior of !.e
li-ilioN ci'ii.'i" 'i'.h j during Ih.i Itcv
li.t.. . nppi'ou .hmI the fort III bouts.
I o.-,ia!i linim-i lately opened lire, but
t '.iU fare to over the Jicatla of
eioli, f,.r lie rouMzcd what his fate
uould be If lie killed any of tbein.
I'rai.ninieil , y tlie llrlng. tlie Colo
iil.H sutiruicr Into the fort, took
',' 'hri.n and ! ;h men prisoner, but
lo!, li .eil t!iein i.'ter they had carried
tinny list Imnels of gunpowder (some
! wblcli. In, hi. tiially, as "returned"
lo the I'c: i if.li fi.i the llamltig mouths
ll p.iliiotic iiiii kcta on Iluuker Hill
a llltle later) and other supplies. Al
tliia'L,ii lioieruor Wi-nlworth las-.h-d a
I r.ti l.itualiuii calling fur the arrest of
these "trnli.'rs to hi majeiy,- noth
ill.' Was ever dmie about It. und In
.inr.i'. 1775, after ! cT' ts to enlist
ue men ' lefer ! 'V fort had
fulled. Ii ni"v... lot,, i ort William
end Mao '"I lil.. iiiliiily to bold It
lor King tleorge.
Vy Aut-UHt the situation bud become
o tire:, Idling that Win! worth was
k-lad to make bis escape on a llrltlsh
ur!ilp ntul liniucillatcly after his
!i paiiure tlie Americans demolished
llie fortri's, Years later another fort I
was built on Ibis historic ot nnd It ;
win appropriately named Kurt Con- j
Hitution. a lit successor to the llrltlsh
lort Wllliaiu' and Mary, where the J
opining guu of the lievolutlon was ;
fired.
UC 1321. W.slern Newspaper Vntoa.)
Home of Rare Dirdt
' I'.lrds of paradim- are found In New
Guinea, Molucca Islands, and a few
other neighboring islands, also In north
eastern Australia. Tgrets range from
the I nltcd Slates smith (o southern
Smith America, from 'etitrul llurope
aouili to Southern Africa, ami from
North Ontral Asia south to Autralia.
Thundertlormi
At any one tuomeut, statlnllcs sbo v,
there are un average of about l.WS)
tliiinilirsttKriiis In iro;ri-s the World
over, giving :M"sK) Hashes of light
ning an hour, or 1M) a s,sund. In a
year's time the earth will experience
pi.tKsi.issi thunderstorms or 4-t.OnO
daily.
Young Opportunist
"Ob, imimmn," etclulmed her llttla
five-year-old, all out a lireath, "I've
1:irit been playing with the Ooodwln
i-iilldren an,d they have Die measles.
uw ran J eat all the randy
to, Vaiise you know I'm going
tick, anyway?" lioston Trntiscrli
Good Tobacco Smoke
" 1 ' " ' ' "i'l" ',;
because of Its Infinitely small, ;;S
lilue
iiarlldes of light of that color, accord-
Inif to scientists. The smoke, In real
i:, Is a dark brown, llie blue being
I :c rely the relleetlon of the light
v u i es. Cleveland I'lujn liealer.
Judging by Oneself
Never put mncli cuiiliil -nie In aitch
. s nut no conililctice In odiers. A man
'n tie to NiiHpm-t evil Is mostly luok
: In his m-lglihor fur what he sees
I I lilniself. As to the pure nil things
i rc pure, even so to the Impure, all
tiil.igs lire Impure. Hare.
King Called Ironside
liilivnrd It, Mnglinh king from 1,107
lo l.'I'.'T, was popularly known as Iron-t-ld'-s,
'The name was given him, in-,
mrdlng to some, on account of bis
I rent strength; according to others,
i n account of bis heavy armor.
Daily Text
When .Joy comes In the .door Troit-H
Wo llies out life window, but some folki
make (rouble by celeliriillng Joy, '
r 111 t
Japanese Hospitality
In Japan It Is a custom to set food
before guests at whatever tlifig of day
they call,
Ease in Dress !
Women have It easier, It takes pull-'
lug to dress a man, but gravity duel
It for woman. Duliith Herald. I
Coafi for Jewi$ti Feaitt
Km-y year In the Vnlied Utatea
tlioiisiiiids of gouts, specially ruined on
tlio I'n nils In the South, ate bought up
and sold for shipment to .large Jewish
cculei's nil u'ver the. country, Tin
goals' meat la used lit the Jewish feast
ing foNilval after the .I'nssovur, Kroui
the. country nround Tliomiisvlllii, (laH
iilone u"shlpineiit of l.t)tK.l head of gonll
was tiiaile up for illstiihullun along tlia
iN'ortli Atlantle coast, i
Absolutely Safe
Two tituld old ladles were hoard
lug a huge ocean liner. "1 do hope,"
mi Id one, "this Is a tui ft bout," The
oilier old liuly smiled reassuringly,
"1'iin't worry about that," she replied.
"I selected this bout after 1 hud Hi
tilled to nil tbe bonis turning Into the
liiirbor, mid I can personally assure
you tlils shlp baa tlio hndlcst whlsll
of nil!" ,
Firtl Vanity Cute j
Olio of the earliest known vanity
baits has been discovert i In (he rillllS
of tin1 undent colony of ullilu, which
ileiiilslieil in the r'ii'tli cenluiy. Scarcb.
im; the tombs, u, I'rofcs ur Zull'er
m m. I a hiuall bag of linen iihlch con
luiticl a nietul niliTur, ui.iteiial reseui
bllng rmn-e and u piitcll for darken
i'.ig the eyebrows, ,
American Rlvert I
The Aiiihuoii rher, In South Amer
ica, iltaitiH an urea as large as that
of the Mlsilssip, but sit. h li i rlioiy
(insists laivcly of w ll.lerm i. Tlie
Ic.iglli of tlie Amnion river Is "I'l'O
n. .lis, unit thill of the Mississippi Is
1 (I tullis fr. i.i I'm source lii l.ule
It isca, Mllltii'iola. to llie tiillf of Mex
l.o. ;Aifenticn
4.
t
u
DON'T
j
I f
t
' y
it
t
T
S ?. f-S
With Yourcelf
When you come to know tint your
i.d h :nxt :o .
It pays to investigate fuel prices at
TIR FARMERS.
When you are in need of fuel at reas-
I , s
. . lUltI S.
IS x..,
. AA fS4-M A e j
t ,V ; ; i'l T !' ' 1
i'.A&'--.x-i.-
I want'l 4-JL
Machinery Cost
In Half
i
t The man w!io leaves his nvithines hi the fields is pay
ing, by depreciation, for an implement shed, but no'
IjJj eitiiijl me slied. . ,
; You can cut your machinery co.st in half by prolong
p hij its lite and usefulness. Yoa can double the life ol
J an implement by putt n it
r,arc through usi.i it
y r i : : o;t of an implement shed to protect $2,000.00
worth of machinery is only a fract ion of that sum.
( 1 We have many excellent implement f.!v:d vlans to show
r 71 . - -a -I
jyw, and we have the nsi
1 kind and size btrldmrf yr,u requ,;e. Do not make the
h mistake of buildh;; before yo" examine our up-to-date
.,; implement shed pla is. we will be lud to have you call
iand examine them, whether you arc building now or
f later.
Tum-A-Lum.
ns Mintr of Hiirhs was the ftlaht
of sleps"leiiillilg froiii llie dour of tl, i
tipper prison to the fiu-iini In Hoiim,
on which lite c s if i u: munlered
by the oiupore ' m l r vc .m exposed.
Twenty MiUn of Shelving
Hluce llie fulled Hluli'H palelit olllci
wns'esliihllsliiiil n 17IH), more Hi mi 1,
fiim.iXKI patents have been Is'iiicd,
t'uples and inoilels nf these pnlciiH
occupy lid miles of slielvlng,
Balbrigpan Clcthing
ralbrlguan Is Ilia naniii of a seitport
In Ireland miles from Inthllu, Its
principal miiu'ifiicliires are eiubrold
ered intilliis, cut Ion, calico and limns.
American Chthenptm
Anywhere In the world, no imile
where, the chances nre that the chillies
pins ns' il in hiii'itlni! out chillies were
made Its An, n i. a.
Earlieit Photograph
The Hr-t pholograplilc porlnill
lul.cil from life was priuluced by I'ro.
feor I i:i!ii-r at the t'nlveisllv of ,'ei
Yoik in
Hfntraintt cf Poverty
The worst feiilurii iiliuut poverty Is
that II leaves yoii s i lltilii to p, iii for
lliliii; you juiiiecil..- imiuiii Hen li',
Too Doigrtir.3
"Should we have rcmale nr'lil cts"1"
Is being discussed III a dallv pupi ., A
tiuile eynlc iinpiiribmably p ito.n iliai
there are quite enough il"' lug v., in
en iihoul nlreudy, lrfiud.,.1 I'm i
r ll a:.iV
t! an p'l p' r cent i
.i a is n.it Ue boiu.
fVI I.
a iv .!,
I ol'i.i
Farmers
?K ' 5 ft ff
Us.
1 '1tA1
.0,
s.MtMft s wimoMit
srt7-t 7'f1?'
muter cover as soon as you
L L . I A i i f , L
rn.uenai to duiiu jumuick
' ,
Lumber Co.