THE GAZETTE-TIMES. HEPPNER. ORE., THURSDAY. FEB. 3, 1916
PAGE FIVE
The Funnybone
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IWILLG1VE S1009
lflFAlLtoCt!REiCARxTl!!'iORnrtit
before it POiSONS in, tUais u rttjtfts ti BONE
WittoatRaileorPan
No PAY Until CURED
WRITTIN CUARXMTFX
No X Kuy or oilier
wlmlle. Ail Island,
pltiut makes theturc
Any TUMOR. LUMP or
SORE on the lii. face
or body long Is
CANCER; it never
puinsuntillaKtstae:
120-PAGE BOOK K'nt
IRKE. lO.OoO testi.
monials. driu li an
Ai9 UlBPta WCISAHTS BREAST
if P (I U J C 13 maaiways poisons rteepamv
Vrt"lV.JI pit gum.
One oinuu uitvi-ry7div2a
1 pit glutuls and KIUS QUICKLY
Onu voiuau iuvtry7uiesoI cancer U.S. rt-purt
We refuse many who unit too long & must die
Poor cured at half ptire if cancer in yet smell
Or. & Mrs. Dr. tMW & CO. MFKa
"Strictly RsUshle, Greatest Cancer Specialist llvlnz"
4343 & 4it Vfhicia 2L, San rrancisco, Cal
KINDLY Ma 'I. THIS tl WKm tit CANCER
When
you
need
two-vision
lenses be
sure to get
KRYPTOK
x" LENSES AV
(Worn liy over 250.000 people)
Forin allothcrtwo-vision lenses
there is a line or scam between
the near and far vision portions
that makes the wearer look less
than his best, and unmistakably
brands him or her with a sign
of age.
Kryptoks are double-vision lenses
that lockexaclly likeri'L-ular one-
vision lenses because there arc
no lines or seams in Ibcm.
WEEK'S NEWS.
Local And Personal Happen
ings of Heppner And
Vicinity.
FOR HALF 3000 Posts (In town)
10c each. PHELPS GROCERY CO.
A. E. Bates of Hardman was in the
city last Friday.
. C. A. Hinton of Lena, paid Hepp
ner a visit Saturday.
S. E. Notson made a business trip
to Lexington Tuesday.
Robert Allstott of Eight Mile spent
Wednesday in this city.
Mrs. Emmet Cochran, of Monu
ment, is spending the week in this
city.
in the city
from Black
Dr. Winnard can supply
these lenses
Satisfaction guaranteed or
money refunded.
RE PREPARED
LAR MECHANICS
feOPU
AWGAZINB
300 ARTICLES-300 lUUSTBATIOHa
Ittfp Informed of the World's Protrress in
Engineering, Mechanics and Invention. For
Father and Son and All the Family. It appeals
to all classes Ulci ano loung Men ana women
homes throuRhout tin world. Our tnreiim
Comftponilents are constantly on the watch
lor tilings new ud interesting and it is
Written So You Can Understand It
'he Shop NotM Department ("U rnaes) contains
'nu'tliiul Hints forHhop Wort mid en ways lor Uu
i ... An ' h!n imiin.! Din Hnmn.
Unutaur Mrnlc (17 l'liensl for the Boys i and
lllrlswho lisetouiHSiiiinK.ieiiBnuwwiiBw"
less awl Tolearsim uillliiH. j-.nginea, itouiis uim h
I 1-.. 1 1 Vi.-nltn... .In fntlllll. ill
Ltnu'tl'nns for the Mechanic, (Juniper and KlMrtiinan
I SO PER YEAR SINGLE COPIES, 13c
w mi. rr mmr w ntn m. m. f-
Sample copy will b. S.nt on request.
POPULAR MECHANICS MAGAZINE
No. ssicnig.n nv.nu..
REDFRONT
Livery & Feed
Stables
WUXIS STEWART, Proprietor.
First Class Livery Rigs
kept constantly on hand and
can be furnished on short no
tice to parties desiring to drive
into the interior. First class
Hacks and Buggies
Call arouad and see us.
We cater to the
Commercial Travel
ers and Camping
Parties
and can furnish rigs and driv
er on short notice.
HEPPNER - - - OREGON
I ft no more necessary
TwDLinlll thanSmallpox. Army
I I F nil III experience has demonstrated
I I' 1 1 w the almost miraculous effi
cacv. and harmlesiness, of Antityphoid Vaccination.
Bo vaccinated NOW by your physician, you and
your family. It Is more vital than house Insurance.
Tsk your physician, druggist, or send for "Have
Touhad Typhohlr" telling of Typhoid Vaccine,
Suit! I fro" use, and danger from Typhoid Curlers.
tup CUTTER LA50RAT0BY, BERKELEY, CAL
Immal cci. "" '
Omar Luttrell was
Tuesday on business,
Horse.
Jas. Furlong:, of Hardman, made
this city a visit Monday, returning
home Tuesday.
A son was born to Mr. and Mrs.
Fay Pettijohn in this city on Monday,
January 31, 1916. N
Mrs. William Driscoll, who has
been threatened with pneumonia, is
reported improving at this time.
Mr. and .Mrs. Frank Turner and
children are visiting in the city this
week as guests at the home of W.
G. McCarty.
Jack Hynd, prominent Cecil sheep
man and member of the Morrow
County Fair Board, spent Friday in
this city on business.
Natt Webb, Jr., of Walla Walla,
is in Heppner on business and visit
ing at the farm home of his brother,
Paul, south of this city.
Henry Coats moved his family out
to the Eight Mile ranch today. Mrs.
Coats, who has been very ill, is great
ly improved at this time.
Oscar Keithley, Eight Mile farmer,
took out a load of supplies from this
city Tuesday, making the trip
through the snow storm by sleigh.
Dr. Cecil Dabney of this city is re
ported to have passed a high mark
in the examinations before the State
Board of Medical Examiners held last
month.
F. C. Alten passed through Hepp
ner the first of the week on his way
to Portland from Grant county,
where he recently purchased a stock
ranch from N. S. Whetstone.
I Ralph Burnslde and Fred Ash
Jbaugh, farmers of the Hardman sec
tion Draved the sioriu mm umue
Heppner a visit on Wednesday. They
returned home this morning.
H. S. Ewing, well known farmer
and stockman of Cecil, was a busi
ness visitor in Hammer the first of
the week. Mr. Ewlug reports he has
considerable hay for sale at his farm.
H. S. Neel has moved some of his
cattle from the Lonerock country
down to the Graham place on the
John Day, where he has purchased a
large amount of feed Condon Tmes.
Mrs. LlUIe Cohen has moved into
the Bush street home recently pur
chased of Dr. C. W. Lassen, while Dr.
Lassen and family have moved to
property they own in Riverside.
Pendleton E. O.
Mrs. C. W. Shurte, teacher in the
sixth grade, has been confined to her
home this week on account of ill
ness. Miss Muriel McCarty of the
high school has charge of the pupils
during her absence.
Rev. T. S. Handsaker returned
home Tuesday evening from Baker
where he has been holding a success
ful revival meeting for several weeks.
Mrs. Handsaker and son Jean accom
panied Mr. Handsaker home.
We would call your attention to
the advertisement of The Horn Pas
time in this issue of The Gazette
Times. Mr. Groshen has opened up a
nice confectionery and makes a bid
for a share of your patronage.
Rev. A. Mackensie Meldrum of the
Spokane University filled the pulpit
at the Christian church in this city
last Sunday, both morning and eve
ning. Rev. Meldrum Is an able
speaker and a man who has traveled
much over both the old world and the
new.
Horace Addis, field editor of the
Rural Spirit, a leading stock journal
of the Northwest, with office in Port
land, spent Tuesday in Heppner in
the interest of his paper. Mr. Addis
is on a trip which will take him
through Umatilla, Union, Wallowa
and Baker counties, before returning
home.
The greatest religious meeting ev
er held on the Pacific coast will con
vene at Portland February 13, and
remain in session four days. It is
known as the Laymen's Missionary
convention, is non-sectarian in char
acter and will be attended by the
male members of every church in the
state of Oregon, southwestern Wash
ington and up the Columbia river as
far as Pasco. The meeting is to be
addressed by some of the best known
religious sneakers of the world; men
who are foremost among the brillant
orators of the evangelical churches
of the world, and the convention will
repay a trip to Portland to hear
them. Meetings will be held morn
ings, afternoons and evenings. .No
collections will be taken up, and no
subscrrotions asked. Special rail
road rates on all roads.
Simplicity.
Tit-Bits: At a British recruiting
meeting recently the speaker, having
got his audience in a high state of
enthusiasm by telling them of the
many brave deeds performed by our
soldiers in France, suddenly espied a
big, strongly built man in the back
of the hall. "My man," he cried,
"how is it you are not at the front?" (
"Oh, it's all right," replied the
burly yokel; "I can hear every word
you say from here."
till
l)o You?
"Willie," said the teacher of the
juvenile class, "what is the term
etc.' used for?"
"It is used to make people believe
that we know a lot more than we
really do," replied the bright young
ster. Chicago News.
I I I I
A traveler who believed himself to
be sole survivor of a shipwreck upon
a cannibal isle hid for three days in
terror of his life. Driven out by hun
ger, he discovered a thin whlsp of
smoke rising from a clump of bushes
inland. Crawling carefully along the
eround to study the type of savages
before making his presence known he
overheard one of the group say,
"Whv in did you play that
card?"
Y
He dropped on his knees and de
voutly raising his hands cried,
"Thank God, they are Christians.
! i i I
No Respect for a Lawyer.
An English journal tells of an ac
tion brougut against a farmer ior
having called another a "rascally
lawyer." An old husbandman, being
. I.J 3. 1. 1,,1
a Witness, aa ttaneu u lie ucaiu
defendant call the plaintiff a lawyer
"I did," was the reply.
"Pray," said the judge, "what is
vnur oDinion of the import of the
word?"
"There can be no doubt about
that,' replied the fellow.
"Why, good man," said the Judge,
"there is no dishonor in the name, is
there?"
"I know nothing about that," an
swered he, "but this I know if a
man called me a lawyer I'd knock
him down."
"Why, sir,' said the judge, pointing
to one of the counsel, "that gentle
man is a lawyer, and I, too, am a
lawyer."
"No, no," replied the fellow; "no,
my lord. You are a judge, I know,
but I'm sure you are no lawyer."
New York Sun. '
IMS
A small speciar constable when on
top of a tram-car was requested by
the conductor to come down to deal
with a man who was inclined to be
abusive. Reluctantly, the special
constable complied with the request,
but found himself confronted by a
huge navvy about 6 feet 6 inches high
and 4 feet broad. "There he is,"
said the conductor; "he won't pay his
fare." The small special constable
reflected, and then remarked sadly:
"Well, I suppose I must pay it for
him." Tit-Bits.
I I I I .
Proof.
"Herbert, you weren't listening to
what I said."
"Er what makes you think that,
darling?"
"I asked you if you could let me
have a hundred dollars and you smil
ed and said, 'Yes, dearest.' " Life.
SMI
For His Wife's Sake.
"Well what do you want?" said
the master of the house, sternly, to
Dreary Samuel, the'tattered tramp,
as he stood outside the door shiver
ing with the most accomplished art.
"I am looking for work," replied
he of the unemployed brigade. "Ain't
you got no scrubbin' or washin' or
cleanin' or nothln' that an honest boy
could do?"
This earnest appeal for work made
the householder think that he had
misjudged a real, honest, British la
borer out of w&rk.
Ah," he said, "now you speak like
a man. l iiko to near or any one win
ing to make an effort. I never
thought you wanted work of that
kind."
No more I do," whined Samuel,
shuddering at the bare idea. "It's
work for my wife that I'm looking
for."Tit-Bits.
S 9 S 9
Among the ancestors of Wendell
Phillips were several Puritan clergy
men. Perhaps it was a push of
heredity which made him at five
years of age a preacher.
His congregation was composed of
circles of chairs arranged in his fath
er's parlor, while a taller chair, with
a Biblfe on it, served him for a pulpit.
He would harangue these wooden au
ditors by the hour.
"Wendell," his father said to him
one day, "don't you get tired of
this?"
"No, papa," wittily replied the boy
preacher, "I don't get tired, but it is
rather hard on the chairs."
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SHOES
SHOES!
SHOES!
I
AT
MINOR & COMPANY
A GREAT many new shoes advanced
in style have just been received by
us. They are of the famous Brockton
"Cooperative"iine, which has no equal
for honest wear. A Shoe that is honest
in every feature-Style, Workmanship
and Service.
With this new large range of styles we
are very sure we can please everyone.
We want you to look them over.
In BLACKS we have Laces and But
tons in Gun Metal, Glazed Kid, Patents.
Laces and buttons in Light Tan, Win
ter Tan, Kid. English styles in both
black and tan.
MINOR
CO.
SEE OUR WINDOW.
"GOOD GOODS"
The G.-T. Printery
will be pleased to demon
strate their superior work
, manship at any time.
sr b
A card social under the auspices of
the Altar Society of St. Patrick's
church will be given tomorrow eve
ning at the Odd Fellows hall. Play
ing will commence at 8:15 and after
the social light refreshments will be
served. The last social was so much
enjoyed that a larger attendance is
anticipated for this one.
fate
Listen:
if
Prince Albert
fits your taste!
Meets the fondest wishes of any man who
likes to smoke because it has the right flavor
and aroma and coolness. It's the most cheer
ful tobacco you ever did pack in a jimmy pipe
or roll into a ciga
rette. And it's so
good you just feel
you never can get
enough. The pat
ented process
fixes that and
cuts out bite
and parch I
When you fire up your first
smoke you'll decide that you
never did taste tobacco that
hits your fancy like
, Copyright Ifltfl by
f. J. R.ynolds Tobacco Co.
r to chuff, the ah.Da
and color of unsalable brand,
to imitate the Prince Albert tidy
red tin, but it it impottibU to
imitate the flavor of Prince
Albert tobacco 1 Th. patented
process protects that!
iTr
t.G BIWINS PiPE AMD
CIGARETTE TOBACCO
EM
f he national joy smoke
For it exceeds in goodness and satisfaction the kindest
word we ever printed about it I
Men, we tell you this tobacco will be a revelation to you.
So, take this information at 100, get out the old jimmy
pipe from its hiding place or locate the makin's papers
and fall-to!
Your tviahet will be gratified at the neanst store that $etti tobacco,
for Prince Albert it in universal demand. It can be bought all over
the state and all over the world! Toppy red bags, Set tidy red
tins, 10c; handsome pound and half -pound tin humidors and that
fine pound crystal-glass humidor with sponge-moistener top that
keeps the tobacco in such excellent trim.
R. J. REYNOLDS TOBACCO CO., Wiiwton-Salem, N. C
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