Heppner herald. (Heppner, Or.) 1914-1924, January 11, 1921, Page Four, Image 4

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    Four
THE HEPPNER HERALD, HEPPNER, OREGON
Tuesday, January ir, 192 1
v ! S. E. NOTSON
Uncle Walte
Sior
D ID
K
4- I'ltOFESSIOXAL CAIiDS ATTOKNEY-AT-LAW
-h
4. .j. .j. .j. 4. 4. .j. .j. ffic8 In Cour' HoBe
" HEPPNER, OREGON
DR. R. J. VAUGHAN '
IJENTI.ST I WOODSON & SWEEK
Permanently located In Odd- ATTOKXEYS-AT-LAW
fellow's Building Ma8oQlc BuUdlng
HEPPNER, OREGON
HEPPNER, OREGON
DR. A. D. McMURDO SAM E VAN VACTOR
IVSIGIA.Y and SIKGKON VAIN VALIUK
TI ' , ' ATTOKNEY-AT-LAW
. Telephone 122
Office Patterson's Drug Store First National Bank Bldg.
HEPPNER, OREGON HEPPNER, OREGON
F. A. McMENAMIN WATERS & ANDERSON
LAWYIClt FIRE INSUJtANCE
Office Phone Main 643 -
, , r,v. Hjt i r e r: Successors to
Residence Phone Main 665 c fi ptterson
Roberta Building
HEPPNER, OREGON HEPPNER, OREGON
DR. CLYDE R. WALKER x am limIted
PHYSICIAN and BU1WVEON number of maternity cases at my
home in east Heppner and assure
Phone Connections bent attention to all patients. Write
or phone, MRS. G. C. AIKEN, Hepp
IONE, OREGON nor, Or., Box 142. Phone 396. 23tf
Take a glance
at bur windows
NOTE THE FINE DISPLAY OF
ALUMINUM WARE,
PYREX WARE,
THERMOS BOTTLES
IE" PER f X r on These
3 CENT JiJ LINES
Peoples Hardware
Company
Choice Cuts of the
Meats
g EVERY HOUSEWIFE WANTS TO SERVE THE
I best in Meats to her family.. She can be assured she
f is doing so it' she Inns her Moats at this sh"i which
9 is conduct i-il in enni'onnity with modern met hods of
ft s.inil .'O'v m i rk el id c.
.1 '
Central Market
McNAMER &' SORENSON, Props.
rm
CLEANINGJHE DOG
i'THIS Is the most wonderful soap
X ever offered the public," ex
plained the voluble agent, as heopened
his grip. "It will clean anything un
der the sun. It will remove grease
spots, polish tinware"
"Oh,-1 have no
doubt it will re
store hair to bald
& J neaus and make
bf chickens lnv
eggs," said Mrs.
Curfew, sarcas
tically. "I feel
quite satisfied it's
made of barks an '
buds and healing
herbs, but I don't
want any of your
marvelous soap,
having had expe
rience with other
marvels of the
same kind. Last fall an agent came
along, selling a soap that would do
everything you can think of, from
beautifying the female complexion to
chasing the cows out of the corn. The
agent talked as though he had eight-
; day works in him, like our old grand
; father's clock, and he didn't make any
Impression until he said the soap
would heal all skin diseases of man
or beast. It happened at that period
that Mr. Curfew had an imitation bird
dog that he traded a good watch for,
and gave a dollar to boot, said dollar
having been extracted from my prl
vute savings, and never returned.
"This dog had the mange or some
disagreeable disease that caused hlra
to itch In the most reprehensible man
ner. He was always scratching and
nibbing against everything he could
find, first and last. , One day he up
set my parlor table and broke all my
best china, which I had placed on the
table a few minutes before. He also
upset the sewing machine and the
churn, and I don't know what else.
"So when Mr. Curfew heard that
the agent's soap would cure skin dis
eases, he insisted upon buying a cake,
and after he had gone he began to
wash the dog with that marvelous
soap. I don't know what Ingredients
suid soap contained, but after it was
rubbed into the dog's skin that un
fortunate animal became frantic and
acted as though its reason tottered on
its throne. Mr. Curfew tried to hold
the beast, and it reached around and
bit his ear almost dft, and of course
he released it then, and the uproar
he made, as he danced around the
house, holding his ear with one hand,
and summoning the police with the
other was simply scandalous.
"Meanwhile the dog ran off, en
tirely demented. . Mrs. Turpentine
wo crossing the road pushing her
baby buggy, when the animal collided
with said vehicle, and spilled her off
spring into the mud. , I am willing
to admit that suqh. an experience was
aggravating, hut I' don't think it was
ladylike In Mrs. Turpentine to come
over to my house with her muddy in
fant under her arm, and shake her fist
under my nose, and tell me that for
five cents she'd pull all my hair out.
"Old Mr. Poppinjay was standing
on the corner, leaning on his cane,
waiting for a street car, when the
crazy dog ran against bis cane and
he tool; a header Into the gutter, and
I really felt sorry for him when I saw
him going home ten minutes later,
dripping slush and mud like a sea
serpent, but I couldn't sympathize
with him so very much when he
picked up a brick as ho wus passing
our place and smashed a panel in our
front door.
"For two days people wore coming
here claiming that we ought to reim
burse them for damages done by that
ting. It scented that the unfortunate
animal made a circuit of the town,
and left a trail of desolation behind
him. He upset six pans of milk for
Mrs. Trumpeter, and seared Sinith's
family burse so it ran away ami in
jured several members of the faintly,
and killed eight prize chickens for Mr.
lippy, and 1 don't know what else.
In view of which, I think we can
struggle along without any of your
marvelous soap."
I THE BRICK
McAtre CO. Aihen,' Props.
Confectioneries, Cigars
Soft Drinks
u. : s .
I r ;;v .
POOL
YOU ARE WELCOME
I
THE HEPPNER HERALD, ONLY $2.00 A YEAR
An Intellectual.
"You often hoar It said that Mrs.
Olitlicry has all the brains In the Gil th
ery family."
"Rut Mr. Gllthery is a successful
business man."
"Oh. yes. However, he merely makes
money. While sipping tea and smok
ing a perfumed cigarette. Mrs. Gllth
ery can discuss more abstruse ques
tions that have nothing to do with
housework, or the upbringing of the
Gllthery twins than any other w,man
In her set." IMrtutngham Age-Herald.
Block Easily Rmovd.
A prominent tradesman In eouth
west London expstulated with a gang
of road repair regarding a suwll
mountain of wood block duuipwl In
front of his premise.
The protest being Ignored, he sur
reptitiously stuck a card, bearing the
Inscription : "1'lease take one," on the
offending heap.
The philanthropic suggestion was
quickly acteti on by passers-by. and
more than half the blocks had disap
peared before a vigilant policeman re
moved the Card. Louden Exjirosw.
WE HAVE JUST RECEIVED
ii V '
A LARGE STOCK
OE
FINE QUALITY APPLES
FROM THE
FAMOUS IMBLER DISTRICT
They run GOOD SIZE, CLEAR and entirely
FREE FROM WORMS or BLEMISHES,
In fact, are STRICTLY FIRST-CLASS
WHILE
THEY LAST
00 A
BOX
rocery Co.
LIBRARY CHANGES LOCATION
AND MANAGEMENT
The Heppner public library, whtoh
since the fire has been located in the
council chamber In the Humphreys
building, has been, removed to Mrs.
L. O., Herren's millinery store and
Mrs. Herren has been Installed as li
brarian. The new location, it is be
lieved, will be very much more con
venient for the public than heretofore.
! . ' ' '
ii a
v
i
i
i
THERE is a natural liking for
music in tht mitrl r.f nnr -ViIl
therefore fill the all-rcceptive child
mind with harmony. Begin its musi
cal education early and correctly.
With a Brunswick Phonograph and
Brunswick Records in your home
the means of producing music at its
best are always at hand.
It will, therefore, be distinctly to
your advantage to know Brunswick
Phonographs and Brunswick Rec
ords before you make your choice.
Come in when convenient and we
will be delighted to assist you ia,
coming to a decision.
Oscar R. Otto Mih