The Lebanon express., December 29, 1893, Image 7

"J i .
- 'V ' ' ' f' f W"
ft, , ,
THAT THERE BROWN.
The people who occupy the flat imme
diately botjoHtb ours are grout diners
out; and an their dog it of u sociable dis
position he commonly burrows under
the doormat and howls until the return
of hU proprietors. But the howls now
heard by myself and my wife wore dis
tinctly human, und proceeded from our
culinary department at the passage end.
Something uuut have happened to
Looshal We sprang from the dinner
table, and made one bound to tlie
kitchen door. With instinctive delicacy
we listened a moment before bursting
In. The outcries never coaxed, though
at times they sounded straiigery muffled.
Had a burglar dropped iu for a late af
ternoon visit? Was lie garroting the
too faithful creature who had refused to
reveal the whereabouts of the plate
basket? 1 grasped the soup ladle which
1 had unconsciously retained with
nervous determination. We rushed in
quietly.
There was no burglar. Ouly Loosha
behind the scullery door, with her head
wrapped up in a towel, was giving vent
to bursts of emotion which might well
have aroused the envy of the poodle
down stairs. With compaction, slightly
tempered with severity, we questioned
the girl She took some time to coax
out of the chrysalis or pupa condition,
but finally emerged from the folds of
the towel uud explained. Mother who
should have known better, having but a
brief twelvemonth- sinco interred her
Second was now receiving the address
es of a potential Third, himself a wid
ower with nine incumbrances. In jus
tice to the aspirant, we may mention
that he was fairly well to do, being a
retired joiner by the name of Mr.
Brown, in Loosha 'b bitterest moments
ehe deprived him of the prefix, calling
him simply, and for short, "That There
Brown."
The fell news had ouly jnBt been
bronght by Loosha s little steiwster Em-
meline, though Loosha uuu had a pre
monitory warning in the way of creeps
down hor bock whenever she hod en
countered the designing Mr. Brown for
some time post. It bad been a-dorning
in her mind, she said, by degrees as
there wss something up: and this very
afternoon he bad upped and spoke, most
barefaced, on the identical doorstep,
Says he, "Mrs. Hemmans, 1 will not de
ceive you, that it was just through you
droppiug in in a friendly way to 'elp at the
laying out of her as is gone (and her only
buried eleven months) that my attention
was in a manner of speaking drawed to
you; and in a homely way, putting the
thing plainly for your thinking over quiet
by yourself, 1 will say you have three and
me similarly nine, and both being unui
cumbijed, why not make onextra large
table out of your medium and my full
sized?" Which table, Loosha parenthet
ically observed, would ultimately prove
her deathbed.
We tried to soothe the aggrieved
handmaid by every means in our powei.
Being within three days of Christmas
day, and having proposed to entertain
the representative members of our re
spective families between whom, all
the year round, great enmity exists at
a social dinner, the prospect before us
was overshadowed by Looshas gnef,
If matters came to a crisis she would
like as uot take to her bed and remain
there for two days. At the end of her
period of sackcloth and ashes she would
we knew by previous experience, reap
pear as fresh as intuit and quite recon
ciled to the dispositions of fate. But in
the meanwhile what would become of
us? 1 tried to argue. 1 reminded Loosha
that hor mother was still young, active
and industrious; and that one could not,
while deploring the act of Mr. Brown,
revile him for his choice of a successor
to the departed; that that successor
might be called, even now, a pretty
woman; and that men would be men,
no mutter how foolish it was. 1 would
have continued in this strain, but that
Looshu became hysterical.
"She ain't young!" she screamed;
"with me twenty-three, how oould she?
And she ain't pretty; or if she is she
ought to be ashamed of herself! And
both my father an Emmeline and El
f rod's father would say so if they were
herel And if she does it which at her
time of life is a disgrace J shall drown
myself!"
Then she went into hysterics and
drummed the floor with her heels and
the back of a chair with her head In
quite an alarming manner; and 1 woe
ordered out of the kitchen that ehe
might be unfastened and the inevitable
remediuts applied. It took a whole gill
of Tarragon vinegar and the best part
of the tail feathers of our Christmas tur
key to bring hor to anything like com
posure.
That was three days before Christmas.
We have got over the dinner and the
mooting of the clans without any casual
ties other than those we were bound
expect. And Looshu is preternaturuUy
bright, sharp, tight and brisk. As she
goes about her work she sings. "Come
Buy My Colored Errin" is a favorite vo
cal exercise with her. But it has been
euperseded by "Take Bock the Art.
And, from the piquantly expressive
meaning Looaha infuses into the opening
lines, it is plain that she applies them
Mr. Brown, whose addresses have been
discourgod, and whose matrimonial
plans have been circumvented, thanks to
the prompt action taken by Loosha in
the mutter. It may be meutioned that
our handmaid's baptismal appellation
was originally derived from a nonular
novol, called "Loosha of Lain Hor 1m a cold store, and you might see' 'im
sunntt as ti e anoweti winu was comm.
'Begging your pardon,' I says, 'but did
you mean mo or my mother? 'Your
mother,' says That There Brown, 'as 1
think and 'ope will make a good wife to
me and mother to my nine children.'
'Which you was of a different opinion
yesterday,' 1 sharps back on 'im. 'when
ore, arm read by nioincr at an impor
tant crisis. Mother is quite a literary
reon, having worked for several au-
iors, one of whom was a po !ical genius
attached to a well known hnu of soap-makers.
Loosha's mother, like im.ny small,
meek looking people, possos.-os a consid
erable amount of determination, if she
really entertained a weakness for Mr.
Brown, that weakness was not to be put
down with the strong arm. Loosha re
alized that, she tells us, as she stood on
he kitchen floor and met those black
beady eyes, so like her own. True, the
o-iened no parallels, but dashed upon
her subject in a way peculiarly distinc
tive. Emmeline and Elfred, seated on
two chairs against, the wall, paused in
their consumption of bread and troacle
on hearing themselves alluded as poor
lambs and joined their lamentations to
Sister Loosha's. The tumult raged high,
though Mrs. Hemmans preserved a calm,
even, stony demeanor. And in the mid
dle of it all That There Brown knocked
the door.
No quick change artist ever effected a
more wondrous transformation than did
Loosha in that minute. Mrs. Hemmans
had glided away to put her cap straight
and smooth her sleek parting. In the
interval between her disappearance and
her return, Loosha and Mr. Brown had
become quite friendly. Mr. Brown's
manner was quite fatherly, and his fea
tures shone with smiles and gin and
water. He had been screwing up his
courage with that fortifying beverage.
Loosha, as she sent the astonished Em-
meline out for a quartern of the best
and provided the visitor with a reliable
chair, mode up her mind that the doom
of That There Brown, matrimonially
speaking, was sealed. Mother, without
knowing why, felt nucoinfortable when
the widowed joiner proposed taking the
entire family (it was Loosha's day out)
to the World s fair, aud Loosha warmly
responded to the overture.
They took buiinehne and Elfred and
the Islington bus, and That There
Brown aud Loosha occupied a garden
hair seat together outside, mother aud
tho children being stowed in the interior
of the vehicle. Brown wub fatherly
when they started: Portland Road found
him affectionate. By the time they
were Launched amid the giddy delights
of the fair, he wan beginning to think!
Deluded wretch! What matters it what
he thought! It was deliberately done of
Loosha. the betraying of That There
Brown. He wandered with the mother
and daughter, each on an arm, through
fairy land of mingled fog and gas
light They visited the birds, the beasts
aud reptiles: and Loosha appealed to
him tor information us to their names,
species and general habitat, and greeted
every remark of his with admiring
Lore! She never seemed to notice
when be mixed up the Bactrian camel
with the water buffalo.
She weut upou the circular switch
back with him, mother being too timid
to venture, and became nervous in the
middle of the any journey, clinging to
the arm of the ravished widower with
femiuine squeukB of terror. How en
thralled she was by his performance on
the try-your-streugth machine, though
the marker on the dial indicated nothing
much in the way of a record. The more
fascinating Loosha become the warmer
and more perspiring became That There
Brown. He nudged her frequently. All
the sensation of bis corporeal frame
seemed to have taken up its abode in the
elbow to which she bun:
Was it then that the miserable man
uttered the words which sealed his fate?
It may hare been. All we know for
certain is that those words once uttered,
Looshas maimer became distuut and
off hand. That There Brown put it
down to maiden coyness, and renewed
the siege with redoubled rashness. It
was when the Flying Demons were
about to take their marvelous leap
through space, and the popular atten
tion was uniformly diverted to the oeil
ing, that Mrs. Hemmans who was not
without a consciousness that for a suitor
trembling on the brink of acceptance
Mr. Brown s conduct was, to say the
least of it, inadequate felt a tug at her
shawl.
It came from the infant Emmehne,
whose watchful eye, unchildlike in its
keen appreciation of the situation, had
detected tho joiner's arm iu the act of
inclosing the figure of Loosha under the
shadow of her bead fruiged mantle.
After that the widow was taken faiutish,
and had to be revived with peppermint
drops ere the company returned to
Brompton, Mr. Brown was not invited
in to tea, though he lingered long upon
the doorstep. And when he had gone
Loosha uncorked the vials of her con
tempt, and told her parent that she had
been nursing a addick in her bosom,
but, thank God, it was unmasked at
lastl .1
Next morning a procession of four
started tor the cemetery, Emiueline
and Elfred walked in front, hand in
hand and bearing votive garlands. In
the presence of the headstone on which
the virtues of her second were recorded,
Mrs. Hemmans renewed her yows of
faithful widowhood. On the way back
the party encountered ; That There
Brown.
"Mother just 'ung her 'ed," said Loosha
afterward, "aud walked by him without
taking no more notice than if he was
dirt. But he spreads "isself out over the
path and sezee,, 'Don't yon reckonize
your friends, Mrs. Hemmans,, mum, at
this time o day, after ail as has been
said between vsT And then I pushes in,
on he looks up and met my eye. 1 give
THE WIZARD'S FATHER.
flamnel Ed lion Is Hale Hfitl Hearty at the
Age ol' Ninety,
Fathers of great men all remind us tfcat
we may acquire famo through our children,
if not In our own proper persons.' Ti.b
father of Thomas A. Edison, the electrical
wizard, furnishes the latest example nt this
l;lnil. The old acntleinan.-whose name is
you ast me to marry you at the Worm s .Samuel Edison and who lives at Port Hu-
fair. Per'aps you'd like to 'ave us both, as
the Salt Lake City Morgans ain't too par
ticular in that way, and you may belong
to the English branch of the dinomago
tion.' 'You've been and raised a nornick's
nest about my ycers, you cat!' says That
There Brown, with a scowl. 'Maria,
and he looked imploring like at mother,
'the 'uman 'art is impulshuons, especial
when led away by gin and water. Over
look the accident and you won't have
no reason to complain.' '1 could never
'ave no reliance on you, Mr. Brown,'
says mother, with her eyes cast down
aud speakin as if she'd got pins in her
mouth, 'after what has took place.' 'So
make your miud up to it,' 1 Bays, 'as
neither me nor my mother ain't going
to be no wife to yon nor your nine chil
dren, neither.' And he too k and hooked
it, did That There Brown." St. James'
Gazette.
ron, Mich., when he is at home, has an am
bition for record breaking. He might safe-
A View of the Common Herd,
The society journal Vogue bus as one
of its correspondents an alleged member
of the "Four Hundred," who writes as
follows; "What is the attraction yearly
at the horse show, which is always
jammed to the doors? The horses? No.
Society in the boxes, and the people
cheerfully pay their money to be able to
gaze at the beings so far removed from
them, constituting an inner circle. It
was this feeling which caused Broadway
to be choked with a howling mob on the
day of the wedding of Miss Bradley-
Martin to the Earl of Craven, and it is
this same impulse which prompts the
crowds in the upper tiers at the opera
and in the orchestra stalls to spend the
time of the intermissions in gazing
around the house at the fashionables as
if they were waxwork from Mme. Tus
sand's or the Eden Musee and following
them up by aid of the little printed list
on the bill, whereby each box owner is
conveniently numbered and catalogued.
"We stand as royalty does abroad, and
we are prepared for this homage. Those
who cannot see us read of us, bnt unfortu
nately frequently-through the medium of
writers who commence their observations
in the style of one who a few years ago
started his paragraph in this way, 'I
dropped in at Mrs. Aster's last night,'
and evoked, consequently, the pungent
reflection of Mr. Joseph Howard, Jr., a
writer of the people, who evidently knew
bis man:
1 'Dropped in at Mrs. Aster's! Good
heavens! for what the ash barrel?1 "
Washing-ton's Cabin.
There' are few buildings that attract
the admirers of Washington that have
more of interest in them than a decaying
cabin which stands alone in an old pas
ture field a half mile from Berryville, in
the beautiful Shenandoah valley of Vir
ginia. The old cabin was the home of Wash
ington when he was a surveyor. He
came here direct from the maternal roof
to begin the arduous and at the time
dangerous work of surveying the lauds
of Thomas, Lord Fairfax, who owned
all the northern part of Virginia under
the king's patent. The work was ardu
ous because of the physical aspect of the
country, then a dense wilderness, and
dangerous because of the character of
the inhabitants, who were principally
Indians or scarcely less wild trappers or
squatters upou his lordship s domain.
Washington had been selected by the
nobleman because of his belief in the
youth's ability to cope with these ele
ments early in 1748, just after the com
pletion of his sixteenth year, his only
companion being George William Fair
fax, nephew of old Lord Thomas.
Whether these boys erected the build
ing or found it already in place history
does not state, hut well authenticated
tradition says that they built it them
selves. That they used it for an oSce,
kept -their instruments there and slept
in the upper room there is ample proof.
Washington Post.
Cementing; ths Russtap Empire.
The czar of Russia shows undoubted
sagacity in adopting the best physical
means to hold together his vast empire,
He has pushed the trsnseaspian military
railway southeastward uutil it has al
most reached the frontiers of British In
dia and China, the two powers most
likely to dispute with him the acquisition
of further dominion in Central Asia,
Having thus assured the safety of the
Russian positiou in the southeast, he has
undertaken a more stupendous work in
beginning the construction of an un
broken line of railway to connect Eu
ropean Russia with a port on the Pacific
ocean. The whole length of the Asiatic
or main Siberian line is 4,800 miles.
The estimated oostislS'00,000,OOQ. The
work, which is now progressing from
both ends toward the center, is to be
completed iu about 10 years. There will
then be a stretch of railway, all located
upon Russian territory, about 6,000 miles
in length, holding European Russia and
Asiatic Russia hrmly together with
continuous band of steel. Until the pro
nosed railway running north and south
to connect the two Americas shall have
been built there will be nothing on earth
to rival tliiB great stretch of eastern and
western railway across the Russian em
pire, Omaha Bee.
SAMBEt EDISOS.
ly rest on the laurels he won as a record
breaker in 1847, when his son was bora, but
the particular record he is trying to smash
now is that of his own father, who lived to
be 103 years old, and as he is now 90 and
hale and hearty it looks as if he were in a
fair way to do it.
He recently traveled alone from Port Hu
ron to his sou's home at Menlo Park, N. J.,
and five years ago when in France walked
the entire distance between ParlB and Ver
sailles. He thinks nothing of walking 10
miles today and gets angry if any one offers
to assist him iu any way and will not have
it that he is old at all. In his younger
days he was a great athlete, and when be
was 60 years old beoutjumped every man
in the Twenty-second Michigan regiment.
He tried to sustain his reputation as a
jumper when he was 76 by springing from
a train that did not Btop at Menlo Park
and was quite crestfallen because he got a
little scratched.
The old gentleman is 6 feet 2 inches in
height, brimming over with good humor,
very boyisb in disposition and fond of
"guying" people. His son says his princi
pal occupations are talking politics and
playiug jokes on people. He never Invent
ed anything, but with such a son be didn't
have to.
Faster Trains to Come.
That the speed of passenger trains in
this country is destined to rapidly in
crease in the near future seems certain.
There is nothing in railroading that ren
ders siich large and quick returns to the
management sb catering to the wants
and desires of the traveling public.
Nothing so fully exemplifies this as the
immense change that has taken place in
the paBt hve years m the equipment of
through express trains from tbeBeaboard
to the west und southwest.
The luxury and comfort that can to
day be obtained on one of the many
limited trains passing over any of the
great trunk lines is in strong contrast
to what was furnished hve or six years
ago, and it would seem that there was
not much room for fnrther improvement
in that direction. What the public are
now seeking, and what will certainly be
furnished, is fast tune: and that this is
appreciated by railroad managers is well
evidenced by the large sums that are
now being spent to perfect the roadways
of the more important lines. ben oner s.
Ancient Girdles.
Ancient girdles were in some respect'i
like the chatelaines not long ago souiuch '
the rage among the ladies, bnt they dif
fered therefrom ill being more useful,
more comprehensive in regard both to
sex and to articles worn, and when com
pletely furnished more costly. It is
partly for this last reason that we find
girdles bequeathed us precious heirlooms
and as valuable presents to keep the
giver s memory green after death. They
were not infrequently of great intrinsic
value. One of King John's girdles was
Wrought with gold and adorned with
gems, and that of the widow of Sir
Thomas Hungerford, bequeathed in 1504
to the mother church of Worcester,
was of green color harnessed with silver
and richly jeweled. ,
Not a few wealthy commoners were
able to afford the luxury of gold embel
lished belts and were not superior to that
pardonable vanity bo long us no regula
tion prohibited them. Those who have
studied our social history will not be
surprised to learn that enactments were
passed restraining them. Edward III
forbade any person under the,degree of a
knight from wearing girdles, gilt or sil
ver, unless he should happen to be an es
quire of substance valued at more than
200, when a reasonable embellishment
was tolerated. Henry IV confirmed this
regulation, but it does not seem to have
been stringently enforced, for Edward IV
was constrained td impose a penalty of
40 pence upon the wives of servants and
laborers who should have the pertinence
to aspire to be as good as their masters'
spouses. Chambers' Journal. .
Making the Host of Household Pets.
Whatever beast is kept it should have
its own quarters in which it is at home
and free from intrusion and to which it
can retire when it chooses. This home
Bhould be kept clean and sweet by fre
quent changes of bedding and the use of
soap and water. No one has a right to
keep an animal in confinement who finds
it too much trouble to attend to its health
and comfort. It should be regularly fed
on food that is most healthful for it, and
what is quite as essential to its happiness
and consequently to its health, it should
be talked to and noticed as much as anybody.
I am certain many animals and birds
suffer and die in our homes from pure
loneliness and from being regarded by
their human neighbors as creatures of
an altogether different nature. Whereas
the truth is, if one will but cultivate
their acquaintance, he will he astonished
to see how the dullest and most stupid
will woke out of its apparent torpor and
show understanding and character. .
I know a family very fond of pets, in
which the creatures show most extraor
dinary individuality. Their cats do
things no cat was ever before known to
do; their parrots and other birds show
what we call human nature in a won
derful degree, and their dojjs almost
talk. The reason is plain; the animal or
bird is mode one of the family. It is
talked to and petted us well as cared for.
Its intelligence develops, and the beast
becomes very like the human being.
Olive Thorne Miller In Harper's Bazar.
It Must Have lleen Chilly.
A Ueorgia man was iu Waterbury
during a cold snap. He had just ar
rived from the sunny south and his
poreB were all open. He slept at the
Scoville House when the mercury went
below zero and the wind blew a mile a
minute.
Why," said he, telling of it in his
pleasant southern accent, "the chamber
maid gave me some extra blankets be
cause 1 was from the south. 1 wore all
my underclothes and piled my clothing
over the bedclothes.
Then 1 put the contents of my satchel
over all and piled the satchel itself on
top of that, and weighed it all down with
the crockery and furniture. If 1 could
have got the door off its hinges I d have
put that on too.
Blame me, seh, twos as cold in that
bed as it ever was on Plymouth rock."
Another southern man who lives here
says that Georgian is sure to go home
and tell lies about this climate which
will give the whole state a chill. Water
bury American.
A Gleam of Sunshine.
I stood in tho great courtyard of Sing
Sing prison two days before the famous
escape of Koehl and Pallister. The genial
keeper had shown us everything and ev
erybody of the hundreds of prisoners
save the fatal five in the condemned
cells. We had seen the workshops, the
dining room, the tiny sleeping apart
ments, the chapel painted by a convict's
pencil with scenes from the "Prodigal
Son." As we turned to go away the at
tendant culled to me:
"Look yonder." -
There was a little girl, the daughter of
an official of the prison, surrounded by
three men in stripes. How they kissed
her innocent face aud almost worshiped
her as she stood among them with the
sunlight playing around her slender
form!
"Strange thing, sir, but these fellows
do bo love children 1" said the keeper.
"If we only let them play where the .
prisoners can see them, they will watch
them by the hour and spend days in
making little toys for them. Ay," con
tinued he, "and robins, mice, rats, any
thing alive, they will catch, tame and
cherish." ,
The scene in the grim, gaunt prison
was a fascinating one, As the great iron
gate clanged behind us I turned and
looked again. The group was still there, .
gilded by the April sunlight. New York
Ledger. -
A Madagascar Marriage. , .
While searching the woods of Madagas
car M. Hameliu, the botanist, had for
The Tall Grass of Yucatan,
The sisal gross of Yucatan is one of
the most remarkable vegetable products i , ' ,, u.,i,f ,1,. mi
known. It grows in long blades, some-1 Mayomuosa. This unhappy guide had the"
times to the length of four or five feet, 1 misfortune to be so severely mouled by a
and when dry the blade curls up from Madagascar lion that he died, and M.
side to side, making a cord which is Hameliu returned alone to tell the tale,
stronger than any cotton string of equal After recital the irate chief nave the sur
size that has ever been manufactured. v'r 'he option of marrying the widow or
It is in great demand among florists and greased and burned. He chose the
, a lesser of the two evils, but coupled with
among manufacturers of various kinds th UII(leraki 0B
of grass goods, but as soon as its valua- tue rt o( h,8 brother-in-law to close those
ble properties become known It will lauds to all other orchid seekers. ,
have a thousand uses which are now
undreamed of. Ropes, cords, lines of
any description and any size may be
A Profitable Profession.
One of the paying professions of PariB Is
manufactured of it, and a ship's cable said to be that of a trunk packer. He will
of sisal grass is one of the possibilities fold expensive xowns iu tissue paper and
of the future. It is almost impervious "w away delicate bric-a-brac in the safest
to the action of salt water, and is not : .
readily decayed or disintegrated by i ASaooEgg.
moisture and heat, and will in time 11 The remarkable price of t800 was paid In
prove one of the most valuable produc- Loudon recently I' At fossil egg of the espy- '
tions of Central America. St. Louis ornis, an extiuct pgless bird thatinhab- )f
1 Globe-Democrat. . :t . ' i lted Madagascar 1prehistorie times. .,
3t mjey-e.
J