The Santiam news., August 07, 1903, Image 4

Tbs Worst bled st Ooot.
Scrofula
"There's Iota of different hinds el
gnau in thia ootid,” remarked the
Has SINMt down t-> u« through tbe sgee nan who lied traveled k - m , "but the
gnat that says, when you a-k him into
'Gim­
It make« its preiamcv kn*-an by n any a luhecro «turo to have a cigar
■
•
me a peck u* cigarettes,' <omos pretty
i>a>k. culanasFiie < ruptions. Infiai. rd nigh to bein' the pop ot them all.**
eyelids, aura «are. rickets, catarrh, «s*t
l-Fg and gelirra debility.
New tereloa.
Nnffervrs etiouM Gia
Erai< ■fio they elc-ped*
their parents paid Ibe
Edith—Y
village b!ack»w>ilb not to shoo their
Tira eraat specific Io» M-rofuls. effecting
horse, but li.«y siopod in an iutom->-
t’.r i .* err ertul rad
bile
a. nt mres
B.- sure to get H-x-l •
Ernie—That waa nice,
Sues t.vMeace.
love laughs at blacks.mtna
"But bow do you know that be «ent locksmiths —Chicago Newa.
to tieaven?"
T«e PapMI tor Him.
"Kaae the no's kicked him that
away an* tie baln't never <v-me d an
Ho—I ««a bold up for a minuto or
yet."—Atlanta Constitution.
two hy Mrs. Talkingtoo just now.
KI«—That so? What did aba bava
to esv?
aU/ot
lie—<iea whies'
I haven't got a
•trm-g’aphic memory. — Philadelphia
I snlger.
Hood's Sarsaparilla
For rough« a- 1 c-<t4e there ie ns better
medicine than frail Cure for Cooeump-
tiou. Tree Jh venta.
Ibe Real Tt-lag.
Von Lfulsa—W hat duos your friend
PaMlax HsHst.
■ rile? Verse? ? -vs •’ Tragedie«?
Miss Gtddy—What did ha «a» al>«»
II. Kaalie—(in-al Hcott. what do you
Uhe him M?
An amateur?
No. you told him t « m married?
M im hpvits—Wall, ha soainad tur-
• r
Ha
«riti •e advert isrmenU of
e« arm1'—Naw Orleans Times la mo- prised.
Miss Gitldy— Did tra ««k lo al»m*
erst.
M im Spetta—No, but ba askad ’ho«
Ov armatc bed.
it happened *—1‘luladslpbia Prava.
"How wltne««." said tbs lawyer,
Jast I ike a Maa
"you say that your hearing fa g<<«I"
Husland—Nuppoee ws attend Hr
"Yes sir "
"How good’’ Give n.e an illuaba- Thirdly'« I* tuie tonight, my dear.
lion. Can yon bear my watch tick"'
Wife—Rnl 1 have nothing to wear.
"No, sir. It's three days she« I
Il'isl-and—Ob, then «s'il go Ui the
sew y<>u g*mg tab) the jawnsliop. and opera.
ths watch must have mu d an by this
Pls,« a t «slag Game.
Urns."
Brownovit l>—! undcrstaml Groan haa
Natural Coeclutlaae.
heart troubla.
**KI der«'a milk in parad se -ley mus'
Hmllhitieky—Yas end he also ha*
have cviws dar," said Brother M il- •poda, club and diamond trouble.
linn s
-•
e
. '
' • ' • '
abo mu«' have traes. en whar Iraae Is
day's blo«w>ms, en «bar liloewms I«
day's always watermelons in eeason.
bless do law.I"
Hetwsee I Heads.
Municipal Tramways Fey.
May ma— 1 hear you are going Io t«
Newcastle.on-Tyne m<inlci|«l tram married again.
Why, I've never
Fdyth—Again?
ways have resulted in a profit to the
lw-«n li«d up as yet.
town of |<0,000 in fifteen mouths.
May me—No. but
numlwr of times yoa ware
MamheHan Trade.
bo.''—Chicago News.
The increa«« in the Imports of Man
churla in ton years has turn, in the
various commodities, 100 to 000 per
tout. The <u buns revenue io 1V02
■as |»10,0Oi>
Ti e great gr wtb m
trail« has resulted Irem freeeip nation
of beans, bean raks and boon oil.
The Qeeluaee.
Wa are u>>t in favor of pens* ning
genius»«
If this were doue, It would
m«an a deathblow to the newspapers,
tor all newspaper mea will qu<t sort
aad live on their penaion.
Toe Mmh AmblUoa.
"I can't umiaretami why you
chargal my hoy. Too advaitlsed
boy with ambiti -n, ami ho"—
"That's jaet it, madam— that’«
It. He wasn't m Ilia plsca two
be fare he had hie feat - n my desk
ws» smoking my cigars."
dis-
tor a
(net
days
anti
War tlskxis Test.
Th« difficulty in damaging a • ar
baloon in midair was recently shown
by tests made tn Austria. Ths sipari-
montera aa< horwd a baloon at a height
ol 7,000 feet aad l.ad gunners who had
not been given the distance try to die­
si- e It.
It rv-| nred "2 shots la find
tbs range, even approximately, ami not
until the slatv-lourth round was the
baloon hit. It then su stai nevi but a
slight tear, which cau»*l it to dee.end
•lowly.—Chicago (Tironu Ie.
Science
vention
A fungus that rapidly destroys wood
lavements la giving troulde la Eugiisb
c Gee using such pa<li>g. Tbe fungus
spreads from lufe. ted ldo< kt to sciud
onen and th» only mrotra of checking
It arevaa to I* > arvful iuapertioa uf all
• o! b-f'ies la, 'ng ami tba prompt re-
u.oial -f Infei trl bkx ks
Tbe -ur out habit of carrying a live
«•a atiemouv In each of Its two claw«
la aacrltied to tbe Melia, a genua of
stuall crab« of the Maldtve Archipel­
ago. M
II rradade statsa that the
crab's ciawa are too ffnll foe uae la
farther the
defemv. and It la not Hear
anemones ere bdd se a means of pro
Im than or as a trap fur food.
A pr mwel f r-st containing 130 000
camphor trvoa, invaw.rlng fr m 7 la IS
feet lu circumference, has ree*ily
I m - cu discovered lu Formosa It is
estimated that the yield of camph'-r
gum fr->m these tre e «111 amount to
lg.iW0.tMK> p-umla Tbe f"mt la not
entirely romp ord of camphor trees,
but contains other variolas, lacludb g
• a abui dau. e of ‘red grained ' oak.
Nome time ago H W altar allow «.I
that an electric spark feels Its way
from tbe positive ¡«do to the negative
in a rapid necoaalM of preliminary
• parks of Incress i,g I tur’h By a me
excellent pbotogrsptra «Ith a m»vli><
camera, be has m>w proven that light­
ning similarly est«t>llstie« a cumlucttng
path tbr.-ugb tbe air by a oerleo of
minor fie «lies, and that aa a rule, the
from th« cloud to the
lightning
earth ao a «eri«« of continu us dis
charges
Before tbe Royal Mlcroacopk al A.
cleiy In l-ondon, Mr E It Stringer has
d--ecrlt>ed a new melii-d of photograph
Ingobjictamagnlth-d by the microscope.
Tbe light of the elutrtc arc Itself la cm
pl yed, that of the lucaudrecent car­
bons being ahlrld-d, tbe light Itself la
filtrred. ami thus a powerful violet
moBbchrumaftc ligtft, at the extreme
this light excellent pltotograjdra of
minute objects, under a magnification
■ f 2J00 diameter a. were made < nd ex­
hibited upon a screen Mr Ntrlugir
• uggesta that bn-*« specially c erected
- for the ultraviolet rays would enable
, photography to do for tbe mlcroecope
A Bright Stwdeet.
what It lias already done for tbe teh
At a medical college some students
ears l«lng questioned in anatomy, ai d ae< pe
In July ID>>2. E I.. Furlong »f the
oi« of them was ashed, "What mtieiles
hktr« their origin in the popliteal I ulvrialty of Callf- rula rediscovered,
spa-w" The bright student promptly ou Potter Greek. In Nliaata County, a
replied. " Well, there's that one with rvuiarkaiile cava, which had b>-ea visit
the durr.od long name, and I dou’t re­ ad once lx fore by J A Richardson In
1878. A tarty from the univers ty baa
member the two others."
rtnee thoroughly explored the cave, as
now a » mist
a part of tbe Investigation now going
on to determine the antiquity of man
We oker <>n« Uundrsd pellai« Reward for say la California
The bone« of a large
raw st - • «i tn ia«l can uel be>:urvd bj MaUs variety uf animal« have be.-» found, lu
< slarrb < ira.
T J i lilt MT ACS . I'rvpa, T siede. 0
eluding ancient representatives of tbe
■ e ike iiu-lr-«Ignei. b«v« snowa r J I h«u»r
Mr I« i ««I I'. - -«r- «nd I* ko niai p-rr— t r vlepbaut, tbe tapir, tbe h vree the fox.
k s «I «
«I
u ■ir* v«.i . ut» ll>- the wolf, tbe bear, and so on, bewlile« a
•
•
-
i.
g«
u* «.:«
large uutulxr of bird«. It is remark d
t y iLHr 1rs.
We i a T«r«s
that the preoent m luntatnomt chars t r
■ h --a • to gg »is Tulrdo,
<>f that part <>f California la entirely
».
k
.« a Mtsvia.
wuala.«!« i> s, « ». Telado n.
out of harmony with the cxiatei.ee of
■ all ai'aiarrbi «r« I« taa«i> inumali»,a-i g
tir- < i.v «a in« l.:...4 « h 4 is e. > e ■-'••«« o7 mastodons, elephants and tapirs, No
Ul« avium r-rt. «
V'
l
Sc.J k) «U unquiet lonsble relics of man have
ti re -:« Ioi i> oa • a I--«.
b<4u found In the cave
Ual. a rami I r Hl • ar« ik« ka«L
No Lis.
ALLISON 3 BOY
"1 don't think it is a nice thing to
say ol Mrs OI m nt that abe got her M«k«« «« ICws-woat Altvwipl to Tie the
I'aterwsl Itecord.
tin «land at a bargain conn tar."
Alllmn's
Ixiy stomi before hla fatb
"Oh, but It's true
He was tbs
young man that saved her life in a eri chair In alienee Just looking wist
Allison l-Hikcd from hla news
■ rush at a glove rale at HpoUaah'a one fuL
pajvcr to tbs boy once or twice and
day."—Chicago Tribuno.
thru pursued bla reading, but It was
bard to kovp bla mlud on the Balkan
taele Prunes Says.
A man who gits de reputaehun of be­ war cloud under that silent regard,
Small lecovnea
in' dishonest «ill find de people chary so ba laid tbe paper on bla lap aud
Of Ilia <1,000,000 people in Fng'and of dealing sil him, an* a man who am Mid. "W'elir
"I weeded your onion tied thia morn
more than halt of them live on an in- known to be upright can't tride mewls
flat s Ing." Mid Allison's boy.
romo of lees than 11$ a ««ok, and the wch.nl glttm' de Wurst of it
"l>li! you? That was uive of you.
earnings of 7,000,000 ot this number probably de reason why ao many of os
do not asi-eed l'> a aeak for the family. am dodgm iietweeu de two estremea.— But you ought not to tell uis a thing
like that so euddoaly. How did you
(letroll i res Trees.
Chari fi Traete and l ong I Ife.
happen tu Iblnk of It? It wasn’t be
Lalntentleaal.
cans« I've been trying to get you to do
Mrs. Margarets Dania ron of Cam-
bridge, Minn., is 132 yaars old. hba
Toast Master i to < hairman of public Il fur a month, »«i HT*
Tba boy grinuevl and then seated
ie tba motliar of t«o Swadieh Baptist dinneri—Would you liks to propose
minietare end a», riliaa bar 1 ng Illa In your toast now, ray lord, or should ws hluieclf on tbe ■sriu of the chair anil
bar strict edberenv« to Iba tenate of tba l«t 'em enjoy themselves a bit I nger? twlatad a finger tu hla father's watch
— Punch.
cbalQ. “Gw, but there waa lota ot
ch arch.
weeds tu It!” be «aid.
•There were a few onions In It.
"Did you leave
too," said Allison.
them i«r
Nay. pa. my bl
“Of c.ume. I did
cycle tires are all full of punchers. I
If the blood is in good condition at the bfgiunlng of the warm season, can't make 'em stay pumped up any
you are prepared to resist disease and are not s| t to Ex troubled with boils, mor» at all "
"W by don't you take the punchers
pimples, blai kheads and blotv hes. or the itching and burning akin eruptluns
that make one's life a veritable torment aud misery
out of them T’
Now is tbe time to begin the work of cleauaing and building up tbe
"You can't take a puncher out. A
blood and strengthening the weak
puncher's a bole In the tire. I want
HORRIBLY AFFLICTIO WITH BBILS. new tire«, but haven't gv»t enough
placesin your constitution. During tbe
cold winter months we are compelled
I've only got N centa and they
1 bad a harrtbl« money
to live in ! »:« and breathe the impute
atloek «f balls coat L3 "
air of badly ventilated rooms and of­
that brake sst all
"Well, you need only |2 02 now."
•ver my bv>4r aag
fices. We over work and over eat, and
"Won't you give It to me?"
from whisk I
get too little out-door exert iae, and our
"No. my oun. If you want money
eowlg
g«i
a«
yoe*
systems become clogged with impuri­
ethle
relief
until you go t» work and earn It by the
ties and the blood a hot Ixd of germa
I began taking aw eat of your brow. That's the «ay
and humors of every kind, aud warm
You get
yeur m«4isln«, I did when I was your age.
vrsather is sure to bring a rractioa,
and fr«m my Sa> your money too easily."
and the poison ■ ca matter in tbe blood
perlense 1 eaa
"If I finish the onion bed Will JUU
aad aystem will break out in boils and
eafsly say ■ k. B. give it Io me?"
la the b««t ble«4
pustules or scaly erupticua and red.
"How much more have you got to
purifier tn ths world.
disfiguring bumps and pimples
Make
do? There Isn't much to do. Is then»?*'
■re.
M.
F.
BHTTWgB*,
a good beginning tins season by taking
"Sure. I only «veiled one row and
Wytheville, Ta.
a course of S. 8. S. in time; It will not
part of another one
Pa. I was w>
only purify your blood aad destroy the
If I get Du
THE BEST TONIC ANO APPETIZER. tn arithmetic last week
germa and poisons, but promote healthy
next week will you give me the
While living Is hhvravv. Tea., I ba­
actioB of the Liver aud Kidneys and
se me a vi«Usv of Isveure, weisry tsotr
blood. I tan Sawn In e«u«Uis ««A
give you a good appetite at a time
"I'U give yoo a Itcklng If you don't
• narxr: was scare air skis Is («4
when you need it most.
shout ««4 had Io slap eff and real get »>.'* said Allison.
"The Idea of
«•••«tonnllr. I took B. B B. sad ke-
8. 8. 8. I. impi
improves the digestion and
>ii to la«prova at ones, aad «.Her a a boy of your age doing no better than
tones up the Stoma,
h, and you are not
Stoma» h.
tkervusk eeureo bosaavs «trona aad that and getting tired after be wards
• »11
continually haunted by the fear of
I tklnk B B R. tbs bast medicine I a row tn a onion tied
No. sir. you
indigestion every time you eat. or
ever ua«4 as aa ape«ti««r *a<t s«a- just work for It.
I used to saw wood
sr «l tan IS.
J. O RCUTT,
troubled with dizxiness. nervousness
«11 Bailraad «tresl,
Bom«. Oo.
and split kindling for my pocket m -n
and a'eeplessness. There is no reason
I didn't have
to dread the coming ; of warm weather If
if vou have your ayxtem well fortified ey when I «as a boy
condition
It fa
and the blood in a normal,
n<>rmaj, healthy
Beaithy Condition
is the polluted, sluggish a father who shoveled out money for
blood that invites disease germs, mlcrobgs ami poisons of every kind and me whenever I aeked for It. 1 rrmem-
bring on a lang tram of spring and summer ailments, break down the con­ tier one Fourth of July I had go «pnid
stitution. and produce weakness, lassitude, and other debilitating disorders. Ing money, and I rarned «Very cent
I*, sems. Acne, Nettle-rash. Poison Oak and Ivy, and other irritating skin of It myself."
"What did you do «itb nr
troubles
aura to make
i------XL-i/ ar*
appearance
uule their
a the humors and Uunons
" Firecrackers
mostly, I gu«s«
are antidoted and the thin, arid blood
that I «pent It all
I
made fir h and strong before the coming don't know
proliabty put a lot of It in the hank."
of warm weather.
"You »al<t I wasn't to have any fire
A course of 3. S. 8. now would ba
Y -i «Ui,
a safe precaution and s good beginning works thia* Fourth at all
and enable you to pass In mm
comfort
fort though, won't yon, let me? I didn't
'try months
and mean to •<<! Ibe ham on fire and I'U
through the hot, aaltry
months and
sacape the diseases common to spring aad summer.
3 S.
8. 8. Is
is guaranteed he careful thia time."
S
"You may run away now. I II talk
purely vegetable and is ■ recognised as the beat blood purifier and the moat in-
vigorating audpleasant
it of all tonics
Write fer our book on "The Blood and to you about the Fourth of July some
^S Diseases."
rw
atia / ha . ca . Ume next September."
A Good Beginning
imrr tneme co.,
T don't sea any way to s»t ray
money." said tba boy. with an s<-
grlavsd air
"Tbera laa'I any wood
to saw around bar», and if Ibero was
I haven't <>t a saw WLat other ways
did you make money «Gan you wars
a boy. pa?"
"I
huetiad." replied A I! ¡Sun.
"I
dldu't alt around ami try to con a
loving parent I gut out aad showed
uiyeoif a llies ••‘d cbevrful ami tu
duairloua aad lac filed anytiilnx that
cama aloag I didn't mind bovw rough
or bard work was as long aa It was
bonaaL I'd lISs to see yog like that
I'd ba prouvl uf you tUen “
"Was grandpa proud of you?"
"I think you’ve twistavl that chain
as much aa la good for it.** said
son. "Now run along '*
Tba avrnlng following Allison's
dkl not rar urn botua in time fir
nor.
Mrs Allison Mid be bad twoa
away all day and she «as begnnlng
to worry about him.
He got back,
however about dusk
ilia face was
dirty and there was a wide •trv«k
down the front of bls new tweed suit
which looked like ssle grew««- but
which be said was molaaacs Ilia rap
was cubed «Itb mod and Hour, bis!
knickerbockers and picket were torn
and there was flour on bla shoulder
and rgt on bls waistcoat.
"I've been hustling." he announced
'I gut a Job from Tied ma us deliver
lug groceries aad I're made fifty
centa.
Gee. but I'm hungry!
lie
dldu't give me the fifty cents. though,
because I let a case of eggs drop out
of the «agon
You'll give It to me.
tbough, won't you. pa? I earned It."
''You go up to the l«athr«»m and lie
skinning those rags off." said Allison.
"I'U rvme up and talk to you prea
rntlyChicago News.
HOW JOE GOT TO CONGRESS
Tease Blateaasea «III« Flr«t Noen-
■ n«llnn t,» a Mrelaweus.
PAINFUL PERIODS
me by Lydia I I'I b K«
I uum ' s Y'weUkbla < utupiiaid.
With ■ Gram of Malt.
Advantage« always look larger than
d lead va n ace«, even when ibe mle-
are ba'am rd.
Coughing
•• I «as given up to die with
quick consumption. I th«» began
to use Ayer's Cherry Pectsrsl. I
Improved el once, end am now in
perfect health " Ches. E. Hsrt-
man, Gibbstown, N. Y.
New Mavhvae Uwa.
The Cleveland machine gun, firing
tweoty-ttve <n»pound projvakiiaa at
< no pull of the irivg- r, haa l<ean lestml
Tbe gun weighs <5U pounds. It fired
«00 «bota is a minute «itti.-at heeling
the barrel.
It’s too risky, playing
with your cough.
The first thing you
know it will be down
deep in your lungs and
the play will be over. Be-
gin early with Ayer’»
Cherry Pectoral and stop
the cough.
Mlauagersleod.
"Now. theo. young man," said Wil­
li«'« mother, "Î won't let you pia?
awiwll again in a hurry, and you'll
get no sti|.|«r tonight
"Why. is supper all over?"
"You know very wsll it la
You
•ow me al the back gate and heard u e
■ ailing an hour ago "
"Why—«r—I thought yer srus ¡«st
applaudin' do two-bagger I madv."
tVw «U««
Mia« Menard rnrril after doo-
tor« failed to help tier.
•ella Niki«« and OMe.
"I.ydi* K. rinkhwin's Vrge-
unipound i-urvil me after
ttkUlo Com
In Nassau Street, near «bere It m- rg
doctors ha-l
1— f ____ , ami I want ve loto Park ruw, la a little «bop wh->«e
■ ■Jwf irirl' to know about it. I»nr-
i:i< menstruation I aiiffcrvd mimi
> )vnii low in th" al» I omen
and in nir limbo. At other Urne« I
hdd o neavy, itepre.-'l feeling
wLi h mude mr work mvin »wieg
m hard, and I grew jola and thin,
lliu t»< !» me tln< d<*.’tor <»vo tno
dxl n>*t do lie one bit of <<««1, and
I tcu thonnighly divcouraged Tho
d n ior wanted it»* toatop « ik, but.
of t ir-u-, I Ft-uld trot do that. I
fl’ illy I« "in to taki» l.ydl» I-
■•InkliiMii's Vaaetabla Compound
atiii f it better after hiking the Hr-1
b>':k’, atei after taking «ix bottles
I was rntp' y iurv'1, and am now
intR-rfi t h- ilth,aiKÍ I am a<> grate­
ful f >r it."
M im OaonotB .M> nx^
.7 1. I' -’nd St.. New York <4ty. —
»UVS0 far?*« '
'«
IM . *.. U
la ma«
Why Appalli« la Seeded.
Hn*.
Food eaten with mt appetite always
rail vea gas* rie disturban e, bo ansa un­
less ttie sr< retary glanda <>i the «tomarh
are stimulated by a ibrair« for h»d no
tigesiivw juicas are < atrn b-d into the
stomach.
A Ceaver«alien Overheard
Far Sinuta Signature of
NEW YORK
—
Alcohol.
Cpium,
Tobacco
Using V
Spied ot Mslsrspout.
A waterspout spin« with enormous
speed. Its velocity at the sea level
bas tie«u sst.mated at an miles a aiio-
ulu.
W?-tv
fot
L lutt batto
C3t<*'..'LAKS
■MB*- •
•
*•>’ »•voa'soe««' fix
PCRILANO. CBX
N rjc-vw Barn JJf
Some Practical Agvks.
It is nut nevvseary to lesve your
hum« and friends, give up your occupa­
tion or pot on a uniform to do good.
Here is a simple way: When you iiear
a good thing said sb- nt a man, tell
him. This line of nimionary work
does not take any ot your lime from
your legitimate business.
COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY
PORTI AND,OREGON
ulRXVTMi JY THf QgS»kKA
*VP
uhi a rm witH : hi giivu
MIT 0» WOIM PAUL
•
MiidxrJ A.Ucmk lour rear Cosrvet la
CI au A v . Eagluk sad Stivacs. O m wsi
•jd tirar nu Ioramrrvul lourwv.
FrgsUr GlkrUtt Ittnn to CUuki. Eag
Ibk. General Xteacr. litkwy »nJ f.ooara
ki. Fiunts »-*d CesuarKt. Ovil Fnrtntw
in(. Nnkaakal Engineering sad Ekvtrkal
Eagtaeeriag.
The Khulastk- vear,
ain <
*n<
The Subject He t Iked Beet.
"You talk «all on the eubject in
which you are most lnterv«te>i," said
the impartinant girl.
"Am! «list is that ’ ‘ sa d tbe man,
■uielling a compliment.
"Yourself," Mid the impertinent
girl demurely.
Sour Stomach
Catalogue vent tree on nppli
ca ion. Addrcs,
:
REV. M. A. QUINLAN. C S. C.
>
UNIVERSI I Y PARK.OREGON.
>
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• • • • . s-aa • «>« « « a.s.svs a
Th« Champion Draw Cut Mower j
CANOV
CATHARTIC
ra
Thr Mvwgf With (h« JiRAW ( VT-
R.
U.
•M it
• hra I V« iBing IM whwrl« lü |sf«M h*' I
• r üti the iron rid an t giving lur-r»aa«U
I power fvfhAt i culling
it -BGv. jueh -ut
pu»hlng th«
ffMUT Iweln 1 «hen the mot« rultlug
Ike toot« mn l«K. y fur ilw wheel« ie Hit
ft»tm th« gtr uu-1
*eih*i- i»t
the l'itw 1 Ul i ham
I I) keep« the whwr.a ..u th« g' <un4
•fed la ttve n»«et yvwrttul ruder tn the
l< î
IU< t n y >..'llehi«Hi fee if««
•nd f ' h«>. le-.n e tra.- gu« ».’i l ral
•u lar Mailed Irte
isos.
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«nCMUl, lEWli A STAVEJt CO»
i
Atea m U Tari« Ma.
Tatuai. OHt««-
« • sws swea >s<M <-»-•• •
CASTORI!
For Infanta und Children.
Bears the
Signature
In
Use
For Over
Thirty Years
JCAS1 OBI A
,«0x^0«
ó
Negative Vlrtse'a Me «arg
"Why, papa." »he argued, "you
know Arbulhii' t never drinks, chews,
•mokee. gambles nor swears."
"Yee, I know," the tti>.-ged, unto-
mantle old man answered, "hut I don't
want a chap for a son-in-law who mere­
ly doeen't do thing«." > Chicago Bar-
Old-Herald
N ot N abcutic .
A perir r I Rciticdv forConstgwi
lion. Sour Stumor h.Diarrtfiwa
Wurms .1 «tiv\il-van«.kwrish
tvs* ruul I.iiMv or S ufi *
AII»MI<«S
proprietor evidentlv twlievee thal he
■e gomg tu catch rn«u>n ere b -lh "a
kwlvr«'>n Mitvlvlrw Co.
Corning and a gaio«." He haa but a
SI c* K- v MVK« tu ToltN Cuoi K
email wind >w tur thè d «play ef bis
I «**M «f Mw*r»B«MS »«.. PwtisiHl OrsgMtl
• area, ami in thi« «re gr- ii|n«l Blblse,
! a - •
’
- j a
<
Murai
M* buftep-BSf Wtlll
praier
bnuke,
miniature
ioalslte F au I'.
hvrw* H’srhry«
M«< !kit>«rjr. K«
whsels, dico and playmg carda.
f.n»v •r.v! Rx-iirra KB an i mirkurv ><aa«>hn«
W ph » »*• «ben It» vani wf
"iloodueea gracious, Maude, where
are you going with the’ big t onili ol
to •• and those I» see of candy'"
"Wby, haven't y m heard? They've
I.villis I . Pinkham's VegvUsbla got just one 1I the lovliest murderers
('«mip'FUtid cure* female III« w bea in the county jail that ever was '
The gjni.ias) fee Mid Io have been
earned In Wall etrvet by Nenator Bail­
ey of Texas gives point to a story told all utUor iubowv lovvc failed.
by a man from Texas Uf»n the man
r«-r In wtijofi Halley got bla start.
As Appropriate Nam«.
"Ballsy." Mid tbe Texas ingn. "was
Edna—I don't know whether to call
a struggling young law,er In the new my Boston bull ferner Torn pay, Clplo
section Into which he bad mo veil. ■ nr Cassar.
Time bad rolled around to nominate a
Artliuri who has had a rad esperi»
Democratic candidate for Congreve rn<r with the terrier)—I think Agrip­
Tiie day of tbe convention had bwn pa would lw> a very suiUblo name lur
set. It «as concnled that a cenalo j him.
old man In Congn-M would be given
Relavalioa.
the nomination.
"Having much leisure and but little
“1 tool happy today," said the club
money, he thought he would walk to! ■ornan, "I haven't a thing in the
the convention.
After he had fvveu world to do, not a club to attend
on the road for some time a farmer l'u> going to clean bouse aiij have a
drove up iH-hlnd him
‘Wsnter git g « d time.'*
lu au' rlih-'f he said to the young law­
Espenalve.
yer. aud Bailey accepted gladly.
The Husband — A penny tor your
"'Going to the convention T asked
Hatley after a while. 'Yep.' Mid the thoughts.
Wife—It'll cost you more than that.
farmer. 'Ever hear of a young la«
yer numnl Hatley 'round here?* asked I was tiilnking uf a new gown —New
York J< uri al.
llallvy.
'Nope.' said the farm r :
'Good speaker and bright fellow, I un !
l «reasonable Slater.
dt-rslaiid,' euicgcated l<alh-y.
'S'pvra«-
Mamma—Why, llertiart, «bat In the
so.’ said the farmer. 'Yes,' contlnm-d ' world in th« matter with sister?
Halley, 'and be will be over there t<- ;
Ilerlrart—Aw we «as fust a playin'
day and I tell you wliat well do. | haunted houM, an' alia wat the gtioet,
We'll call on him to make a spi-i* h an’ I give her a little chain to ewaller
You see alt your friends, tell them so's she would dank every lima she
about Halh-y and well call ou him.'
moved, an’ now she's a-eryin' an* anys
'The farmer Mid all right. No more she don't want to tie the ghost auy
waa «aid about the matter until there more' —Magazine of Humor.
waa a lap«*- In the conversation dur
Any Present Surprising.
Ing the preliminary movcmetita of the
Mr. Krochett—I'm going to surprise
body.
Kuddeuly the old farmer up
aud suggested that the Convention you on your birthday.
Mrs Krootiett (coldly)— lnde< d?
hear from Mr. Halley, 'a rlaln' y»uug
Mr. Krochett—Yes; can’t you guess
lawyer of these dlggln's.' be said, 'an'
a fellow who talk« like puttin' out ■ bat it ir?
moro j
Mrs Krochett—If you really mean
fire.' 'Bailey! Halley! Halley!"
I
than a doaeu yells went up. aud Ha! ■ to sur| rise me I suppow you're going
ley came forth. Joe Bailey made one to give me some rort of a pmeant.
of the hottest speeches of bl« life and I
An lye tor Business.
the up«hot of the whole thing «a«
___ !
Granduia T»i|<d <aoletunly)—A ter
that the 'rlaln* young lawyer of thoacl
voor grandma dir« «ho will give you
dlgjflu'e' got the nomination for t'ou
any peunirs?
gre-.« and Is now Keuator Bailey of
Terror Knott Toogood t aged eis) —
Texas." New Orlcaua Times Demo­ Why, y-iu Wiin't take your povket tunk
crat.
to huav n, will y<>u, grandma?—Jmlg«
Pantomime tiy Mas O'ltcIL
Bird Superstitions.
"When Max O'Rell came to Montreal
In many parta of England there are
aoiue yuars ago." aald a man from that
clt) to a Detroit Journal contributor, curious inper«tition« a'« at birds
The
"we fixed up a little joke on him H'r stonechat, ho iustanie. Is tralleved to
had nudh-ed bow gracefully b<- could *’•’ conkinna'ly chatting with the avll
unite a caustic criticism with a cuuipll- <>ne, so It is hel<i in bad repute, and as
m- ut. a faculty tbit enablad lilm to «ay 'he raven commonly imperwmate« hl«
the sharjieet tilings without olYrtiding •able majesty it is ranked In th« aan •
tVr latcgory of evil birds.
Sometimos,
the ¡reople he was criticising,
were going to put the faculty to a test h -wvver, the raven's appsaranc«, so it
"We had him lunch with us. and i« held, foreGxIea a death.
there were at the table In-slde himself
an Kngllsbruan. a Scotelinuin. an Irish
man and a French Canadian When we
got our guest off hla guard we demand
rd an honest opinion of the d.ffen-ut
races we represented. As the oplulou
had to be given In the ptraniee of all
f. ur. tbe situation for hltu was a
rather delicate one.
But It never
seemed to trouble him. and be gave hie
<)(><) D rops !
opinion without a moment's hesitation
"'The Scotchman.' he Mid, and be
clenctn-d bls right hand tightly and
pretended to try anil force It open with
bi« left 'The Hugllahman— 'and be went
through the Mme performance, open­
ing the hand at tbe end aft« an appsr
ent struggle. "The Irtsbman—' and lie
ÀXt’gcluUc Pre parali on for As
held out his hand wide often, with tbe
admin I tttii Hr Food dndltetf ula
palm up wants.
Tbe Frenchman—'
Ung (T k SkJiMcitv lirai Dtwarls of
and he m«d<- a motion wlrh both hands
as If he were emptying them on the
table.
"There was not a word of eiplana
PriMnok'N Di^cBliivnChrrnul
lion, but we alt understood thoroughly,
npNsantilfc'Nl
Contain? nrithrr
ami had a hearty laugh
Max U'ltell
Hmmi Morphine norMurral
had maintained bls reputation."
Tales
of gavtronomlcal pr<»w«<s
abound In George II Kllwangira re-
ct nt l>ook. "The Tleasutea of the Ta-1
Mr ’ Q m in p .rtic il ir in k- • t’i ■ f. at
of the growing boy Io k email liidecd
A drummer In the French army was
noted for hla tremendous appetite Ills I
captain wagered that the man could
eat a «hole calf, and the drummer,
proud of hla distinction. promised
|
to
do honor to the captaln'e compliment,
Accordingly a calf was prepared in
varlovia appetlitng ways
The drum
nw-r was diaposlng of It.
When be
had finally consumed
about three
quartern of ibe rejiast he pau«ed and
placing bla knife and fork on bla pLale.
aald to hie superior officer:
' You bad better have the calf
brought on. had you not, air?
All
these little kickshaws will end by tak
Ing up room."
Ih* Medie.
The first nerdis used m Krgland was
made la Muren Mary's time by a negro,
ebo unfortunately dievl before mpart-
log ibe secret to any one. in the reign
of ijueen Elitabath the art ol needle
making eaa dimvivered by a Germau
abo imparled it to an Eugliehmm.
I
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