Image provided by: Ashland School District #5; Ashland, OR
About Southern Oregon miner. (Ashland, Or.) 1935-1946 | View Entire Issue (June 17, 1948)
S o u th ern Oregon N ews Review. T hursday, Ju n e 17, 1948 FICTION P™5 Corner I- C lassified D epartm ent THE BIG CHANCE By FREDERICK LAING E WASN'T the kind to pick a secretary by the color of her hair. Not Bill Hargrave. Both Faula and Nar.cy had been smart enough to know that. And for some time every one in the office had known that one of them. Paula or Nancy, was going to get the job. In fact, the decision probably would come through this afternoon. Har grave was leaving town and wanted to get it settled. The two girls could see him from their desks outside his office. May be it was only a set of proofs for the Zippo campaign that he was looking at with cool, keen eyes. But for a moment his finger seemed to pause above those two efficient lit tle push-buttons. If he pressed the left one, it would be Paula’s pulse that would go into high speed. Paula couldn't keep her eyes off that light on her desk. She kept making mistakes in her typing and nervously ripping the sheets out to start fresh again. She leaned across her typewriter and said to Nancy: “The boss is all dolled up today. Must be going on a special trip with the new presi dent of Zippo.” She was just talking to relieve her nervousness. Nancy took her time about answering. She wasn't used to having Paula talk to her in such an intimate tone. Not since they'd learned a month ago that they were both in line for a pro motion. for the important job as Bill Hargrave's secretary. "He does look nice,” she said, finally. Hargrave was young and out side of office hours he was said to be human But that wasn't why he’d gotten to be one of the key men at Advertising, Inc. He was quiet, and some of the boys in the office hadn’t realised how fast he was traveling until they somehow happened to get in his way. The two girls saw him get up from his desk and walk to the doorway of his office. He stood there with one hand in a pocket of his double-breasted blue flannel suit. There was a small white flower in his buttonhole and the usual keen, unrevealing smile on his face. “Did you send for the tickets?” he asked Nancy. "I got the tickets all right.” she answered, “but . . .” and she tried to smile in the same hard way the boss did. She looked as hardboiled j as a white kitten. “But there just aren't any staterooms to be had.” she told him. “Not for love or money.” The boss was certainly disap pointed. Anybody could see that. "Suppose I try it?” Paula sug gested quickly. And for the next 10 minutes, half the office force could hear Paula telling the ticket agent where to get off. "Listen," she said, “I don’t care [ whose reservations you have to cancel . . .” Well, the job was worth going after. There was the salary, for ’ one thing. And there was the pres- ' tige. Tne boss’ secretary knew a lot of answers. And there were the interesting people she got to talk to. The big shots. And the boxes of perfume, flowers and candy they often left on her desk. And there was Bill Hargrave for a boss. Young and clever and at tractive. That was a factor, too. Because in the advertising business H you called the boss "Bill,” and he called his secretary "Nancy” or •’Paula.” and took her to dinner on the expense account, on nights when the work was late. It was all strictly business, but it seemed intimate and informal. Both Paula and Nancy knew about those dinners. Bill had tried to be fair. He would ask Paula to stay one night, and then it would be Nancy’s turn the next. But Paula had been smart. She'd soon learned how Impersonal Bill Hargrave could be, even at those intimate dinners. About as personal She handed him the envelope. It contained the two sets of tickets. “That's your stateroom number on the outside,” she said crisply. She had on a double breasted blue flannel suit something like Bill's, and it was clear he thought she looked pretty smart in it. “Don't forget the time," she add ed, “eight fifteen." Hargrave grinned. “So there were no staterooms for love or money, eh?” He looked again at the number of his stateroom and he put the B A B B IT S & SK IN S NEW LOOK' REVOLT as an ad that says. “This means you." And she saw how much harder to please he was during the overtime hours — more irritable, more apt to get that edge of com plaint in his voice. So when Nancy had said, “I don’t mind staying nights, really. I know Paula usually has a date. She's popular with the men . . .” well, Paula had been glad to let it go at that. She'd been quick to see that neither of them was going to get the job mainly on sex appeal, and she was right Paula didn't need any lessons when it came to office politics. She was the one who was always busy when some copy cub wanted his stuff typed. “Sorry, but it’s impos sible, Mac. Why not ask Nancy?" And they did. It left Paula free to do Bill Hargrave's work in a hurry. Never too busy for Mr. Bill. When Hargrave finally pressed one of those buttons it was at Paula's desk that the light flick ered. She started to make a grab for her note book, but she whipped out her mirror first. Then she grabbed up her note book and an envelope that was on the desk. As for Nancy, what else could she do but sit there with her pretty blonde head bent over her type writer? Nancy was a natural blonde, and that seemed the best way to describe her. She just didn't seem to know any tricks. The moment Paula got inside Har grave's office, he asked about that stateroom. “Any luck, Paula?” No, Paula hadn't been dumb. It was the little things that would add with Mr. Bill. Orchestra seats when the client was in town and the show was sold out. Or a state room when there were “no state rooms to be had for love or money.” envelope carefully in his inside pocket. Then he told her. She had a new job. He mentioned the salary, too. He didn’t neglect to mention the salary. She took it just right. Just enough of gratitude. And then, the old sportsmanship. How sorry she felt about Nancy. She didn't look sorry. And neither did Bill. He told her it was okay, that Nancy wasn't made for the job anyway, and that they were leaving on their honey moon tonight. Tonight, at eight fifteen. J/ÒdlA gtfi J ZUMA By NANCY PEPPER---- W ise Guise Clip this paragraph out for your own favorite Joe and, if he can take a hint, he’ll come around next weekend looking like something out of Smart maga zine. It's a b o u t time we told the boys how you felt about th e ir clothes, anyway. They certainly haven’t stopped telling you ever new look.” CORDUROY COMMOTION - By actual survey, we find that you high school Jills think every boy looks his best in a corduroy jacket. You're partial to the light tan jobs, worn with sharp slacks. You also like to date something in a three-quarter length corduroy coat. And, with his letter sweater, you think yellow corduroy slacks make him look as suave as Rory Calhoun. BEAUX WITHOUT BOWS — The majority of tenn-age girls vote against bow ties—but go all out for wild four-in-hand ties that light up the dark without benefit of electric ity. On his ties you like one of those new clasps that looks as if it had been pierced right through the fabric. In fact, you like them so much that you’re begging, borrow ing, or stealing them from him. Well, if at first you don’t succeed when you ask for one—just cry, cry again! LET’S FACE IT Parties will be disappointing. Until with this you’ve coped: They can never be as good As in advance you’d hoped. Grace Noll Crowell ...... -................— O long I hare been guided by Thy power S , Up many a tangled path and ftony hill. And now, dear Lord, through thia ftrange darkened hour Be wixh me ftilL Be with me for the way is tong and lor. 1 am bewildered, and I cannot see. But, Lord, I shall not be afraid i f only You walk With me. I f 1 can ever keep recalling The darkened roads 1 traveled in the p i t . How, after You long guarded me from falling. Light shone at laft: Then surely. Lord, 1 can go forward knowing That somewhere on the hills the light w ill dawn. And 1 shall reach it safely if, in going, You ftdl lead oil ^ -V BRING ’EM BACK ALIVE! The revival of “Gone With the Wind” has made lots of you won der where are the movies of yes teryear, and why doesn’t someone bring them back. When you enjoy a book you read it over and over. How many times have you read “Seventeenth Summer?” But, when you enjoy a movie—it’s usually only the memory that lingers on; the movie, itself, disappears like yes terday’s snow. According to a re cent soda fountain survey, here are the epics you'd like to eat popcorn through again. “STATE FAIR” —Jeanne was so lovely—and there must be a word for Dana, but we can't think of it. Then, there’s that music! "JOLSON STORY"—It’s practically everyone’s choice for a revival at least once a month. “MRS. MINIVER” — You’ll even forgive Greer for "Desire Me” if she'Jl bring the Minivers back to town with her. Well, when it comes to movies— one good showing deserves another R E F R IG E R A T O R B Q U IF M N N T bit «kin«. bills*. wotil. inoluilr. caa- cara. liv e p o u ltr y . R u b v » C o m p a n y , 9 35 8. W . Knlea A S erv ice. H om e lockera, h o ttie c o o le r » , r e a c h F r o n t, F o r tla n d . O reg o n . III h o l e * M eal I'XMZ. E v e r y th in g In refrlg' r ation For Hand I*1'- Must the women of America dress P h. MISCELLANEOUS to look part awning, part Inverted H U R R Y I 1 I U B I U I H U B « Y I tepee and part fashion slave? The 140 w eek e x tr a Incom e. « r o w in g iitusb- FARMS AND RANCHES question Is being raised, and by the roon is In b asem en t. W e sh o w you JuHt bow . I.urg»» ib nutiiil Free atari C A T T L E RA N C H In Kl venu <’'»«»»» women them selves. From wfiiat Cheap. 800 a c r e » . H& c u ltiv a te d , 300 «•r »paw n. I,i'»l»,a n l for d eta il» . J- 3. this department hears the women's S h ie ld s, G la d sto n e 4, O ra g o n . m ore c o u ld be On ollm l III-w ay. Hood c lim a te % m ile fr o n t» « » on dress designers at last have suc W \T< II i lin k noil J . w l r j o f Il..... e v e lt Lake 120 p er a c r e . O w n er ceeded in making the female worm kind,« repair«’«!. Iim ure «11 mull- Mt. C. T i f f a n y , C ed o n ln , W a s h in g t o n . V law J e w e lr y , E rn ie Ja en a , S u lU n , turn, or nearly so. The current I 'j V e x c e lle n t s a n d y g a r d e n » o il, W a s h in g t o n . modes are not doing the gals any str a w b er rie s, r a sp b er r ie s; 5 rtn. A irplane T ire*. U n used . T u b es, w h eel», h o u se w ith bath, w ir e d f o r e le c . «ood pictorlally and they know It b e a r in g » , » p ln d le * . For h arvester», R e f r ig e r a t io n Co.. 1518 N ln g e w o r t h , P o r tla n d , O r e g o n . T R . 6844. Those long, loose, bell-bottom skirts not only make It difficult for a woman to look thin; they make It Impossible for a thin one not to look fat. And unless the girls are Just talking to hear themselves talk, a revolt against resembling a wigwam with a head and neek is on. ___ • And for the next 10 minutes, half the office force could hear Paula snappily telling the ticket agent where to get off. FOR SALE __ W A N T L I V E R A B B I T S 4 lb s. up. rub Any dress shop will tell you the omen are mad clear through. "1 ' ai not a Mexican ballerinn, a halt jened umbrella or a poster for colonial ball" Insisted the missus le other day. "And I resent a onspiracy to make me look like a ombination of all three. I have ved on lettuce und other rabbit icd for a year to get fairly slender, nd look what the garment industry oes!” MS • MO "You women have yourselves to blame," we said. “ Your slavish surrender to whatever some er ratic style czars decree has been uninterrupted down through the years. Why don’t you turn and kick them In the teeth by a simple refusal to toe the line? Your wardrobe Is full of the recently outlawed models. This is a time for sense, thrift, and . . .” OM • MO "There you go on that thrift stuff again! I am discussing styles, not economics. And I am not against smart changes in modes. What makes me boll is the abrupt switch from clothes in which a woman could look pretty good, if over 16, to those 1948 get-ups which make almost any woman look as if she was understudying a free balloon.” Im p le m e n t» , lo w b e d n F r e e p ic tu r e » . W o rld '» InrgeHt » lo c k A IK r iiA M S T I R E C O M P A N Y , D B F T . 54. S O X 1 390. M E R C E D , C A L IF O R N IA . H IL L M A N I’RHKI'E« T E R w ell drill 6“ A K" tool». H odge truck, gu» A e le c tr ic » e ld er » . G race Crum , R t. 3, T h e D a lle s , Ore. ’•OWN YO UR" w h o le sa le d istr ib u tin g and aervloa bualne»». W hy work for other*, l.u rg e p r o fits for y o u r se lf year around. P ro tected territo ry . W rite H I N S O N C O M P A N Y . R I C H M O N D , IN D IA N A . FO R KALE In ter n a tio n a l Tl>-9 H ull- dozer, laaacaon l l y i l r a u l l o Blade, C argo L o g g in g D rum , e x c e lle n t c o n d itio n 26.250, W rite S p zd o n l B r o th er», G ig H arbor, W aeh. or P hone G ig H arbor 3080. E ve'» 33-X -4. C H IN C H IL L A S (M o t R a b b lta ) H ave you r o w n b u sin e ss or p r o fita b le sid e lin e. R a ise C h in c h illa s for th eir v a lu a b le fur. E ach pair m e e ts e x a c tin g sta n d a r d s o f fu r q u a lity . W arran ted Io produ ce. L ittle area required. L ig h t, c le a n w ork. For fu r th er d e ta il* w rite. C R O W N C H IN C H IL L A R A N C H 4 6 4 5 8. 182nd S t.. S e a ttle U8. W ash . R e p r e se n tin g A llied D istr ib u to r « H D -10 T R A C TO R w ith 12-ft. a n g le dozer. In ex ce l, eh ap e O nly 1708 lire H. B. B e n n e tt, R t. 1, R o n 8, B a ttle G round, W aeh., P h on e 8OJ3. *52-3314 H A R R IS H a r v a s U r w ith pea eq u ip m en t. C o m p le tely r eb u ilt, V- b elted and m otor o verh au led . R B. W illia m s, P om eroy, W a sh in g to n . railk'V' Hinnll rre«’«, I n ,f- to biMini. ffirtOO D an W h ite h e a d . B t. I , B o a 33, N e h a le m , O reg o n . 4« P A 1H Y A 17-A C R K LIVESTOCK C H IC K E N RANCH. II h o m e E le c t r i c i t y ern ............ .. a n d w a t e r In a ll b u ild in g s . H o m e o r chard P r ic e 3I3.OOU N o m e term s. O sc a r A p » 1 a n d , R t. 8, B o x 2 1 \ P o u ls b o . W a s h . 790 A C RES In Pend O reille Co 9# acre» In bay. 10 ml from tow n on good g ra v el road. ISlactrlolty. T e le phone. M h II rt.. sch o o l bus. m ilk route, sp rin g w ater, fa ir b u ild in gs. L o is o f lim ber. Cbuld b« good sto c k ranch P le n lv outaldn range. P rice 113.500 16000 dow n lla l term s. J . R. P e a r c e , M sw p o rt, W a s h in g t o n . C A S A O IA S V A R S « W ill« u l fu i » S I I IN I F O R M A T IO N <»n *•»»■ •••U tm e n l oepm tunlit««. ■ » • ! « | . a. - • I ' If • • 1» I •all. CaMdlM Hallway» 4»di. HC I 24—48 WNU--13 FARM MACHINERY & EQUIP. JO H N D E E R E M ODEL D TRACTOR 14-ln. t i n s , sta r te r , lig h ts, 1(4 year» old. W ith 3 . bottom IS-ln. No 55 plow anil pow er lif t fie ld c u ltiv a to r . A ll g o e s for 32,600 115 C a lif. O u ta ld t m ile s north o f Ilrem erten n avy yard. K itsa p co u n ty . W a sh , lln b lacktop h ig h w a y , (lo o il la y in g b o u s e s fo r 1100 lie n s. Hood brooder hou se. M od HELP WANTED w antlp ! : . s-. t • i ■ d and undi ri id u a te s n u rse».’ 5-dny w eek. S in g le, under SB. A d d ress Su pt. H a ze l H a w k in s, M em orial X o z p lta l, X olU nter, FAIIM . f l t v lim it* If. B . B a d a n . B t . 3, » a n d - p o i a t , Id a h o . S U M C B E U X P M B jrT c o S . 3 8 th S t., T a c o m a , W a eh . M Aln 3393 BUSINESS & INVEST. OPPOR. W E L L e s t . i.ii i:» groesry ■ ooh g. n . era l sto r e and m eat m arket on In te r s ta te A ve lleer. W ine lie s, l u l l v equipped Moil, fix tu r e* S e e W il lia m B . C r c lt i. A t to r n e y a t la w , 815 S .W . Y a m h ill. B E 9183, P o r tla n d . O re. TW O fin e R eg J e r se y « « yr. old A h e ife r fr esh A ug 1st Plan»» D a iry , J u n c tio n C ity, O regon. FO R KALE— 5«0 fr ee zin g lo ck ers ren ted . In fire p r o o f b u ild in g ili r 16 yea r lean« P rice 11 1,86® c lu d in g fix tu r e» end equip m ent all un- In W. 8 . V a n A u k en . B r o k e r. C o q n lll» , O re. REAL ESTATE—MISC. FOR KALE— G ood Incom e prop erty on m ain Kt. In a good pay ro ll tow n B o x 131, B m m a tt, Id ah o. F<>lt k a l i : \ , \ r v i |< >N 111 T H E Ul HE I’ At 'H 1C AMONG T H E E V E R G R E E N S . M od ern C om m u n ity K itch en , plcnln A cam p ground s. T railer narkin g, c a b in s. oil equipped. Id eal se t up for la rg e groups, clu b s, fa m ily r eu n ions, e lc . C lam m ing, fis h in g , c r a b bing, b eachcom bing W rite t o O cea n P ark T ou rtet Cam p, O cean P ark , W a eh ln rto n . ' - 0 a.-t ■ ». 2 miles North C u rlew Lake, ab ou t 90 c u ltiv a te d , b alan ce good p a stu r e, sp r in g s, som e tim ber. 240 acre* 6 m ile s S o u th w e st tow n , h as ab ou t 800 th o u sa n d fe e l »aw tim ber. T o w n prop erty. 2 good D u p lex d w ellin g * , e a r n in g s near 20': Sold se p a r a te ly , or a ll for 124.000,oO UROCKRY sto r e and se r v lc a e la tio n B . JO N X 8. B ox 585, R epubU c, W ash. on m ain h ig h w a y w ith 2 9 / 1 0 ucres. 5-room m odern liv in g q u a rte r s. H o o d B B B T XH T K R W E S T h u n tin g and f is h in g 22180 00 a T o u r ist Court». Apt», and Home». m onth g r ic s P rice 212,000.00 A d ”1 am with you, my sweet,” we insisted. "The 1948 modes do for a woman what sailor pants do for a man.” “In the past a woman could al M y r d s l Go.. R e a lt o r s . 133 H o r th H i g ways take something from her left d r e s s B e n J . H o n d ek . R u n ts 3, B o a g i n s , M is s o n is , M o n ta n a . 39 0 , K la m a t h P a lls , O reg o n . over dresses in a pinch like this DOGS, CATS, PETS. ETC. and weather the tide, but you can't SM A L L h o te l, su ita b le fo r co u p le to run. O w ner h as o ilie r h u sln e s B ox make a 1947 dress look like a forty- PIGEON'S: W rite K in g, p roven breed 54 3 , C o u le e C ity , W a e h . ers, 32 pr, W . H . M um psr, R ts . 4, eighter unless it is for New Orleans, B o x 3 3 1 , A lb an y, Ore. M O D ERN groc. and m kt , 3(4 ml. ft. Mardi Gras purposes," she replied o f Lebanon on H w y. 20, by ow ner. P .O . B o x 68, L e b a n o n , O re. MACHINERY sadly. “ I have seen some women who, S1CKNEKH fo r c e s us to s e ll m o d e rn G ray m arin e D ie se ls , q u ad s nr tw in«. wearing the new look thing could cou rt, 4 d ou b le u n its, 2 s in g le u n its, ■ z c co n il. lb .is. 1835 D e la w a r e B t., 3 c o tta g e s, a ll h ave sh o w e r s, to ile t s B e r k e le y . C a lif . B e r k e l e y 7 -8 3 8 6 -W . enter a Mardi Gras as a decorated and equip ped w ith g a s , nH n icely fu r n ish ed : a large resid en ce, a ir » float,” we said. FO R SA L E — 30 c a t., r e c e n tly over- hauled, new p isto n s, etc. P rice 21650. “ Don’t look at m e,” snapped the missus. “The simple truth Is that few outside of this year's high school classes can blossom forth in modern fashion without resembling Whistler’s Mother or Barbara Fritchie both wrongside up and very unhappy.” She put on her hat and started for the door. “Where are you going?” we asked. “To the United Nations! The matter belongs on their agenda. And what’s more no candidate for president gets my vote who doesn't come out with planks to compel dress designers to register, take an oath they are not malicious, swear they are not undercover agents for Old Mother Hubbard and stop rack eteering in feminine vanity.” THE DOVE I can’t make peace with any men, Except through Mr. Wallace, (H en); To each approach my stare Is blank— But not to Mr. Wallace (Ilank); It’s funny how I give the gate To all except ONE CANDI DATE; Ah, I am sweet and short of malice— But only via Henry Wallace! The Country Editor Say»: Quent Parker has switched from regular to high test gas and Is con sidering a cash offer to appear In a magazine advertisement as a gaso line user of distinction. Tootsie Benham's new 1948 bathing costume arrived yesterday In a regular sized envelope. • • • An appendix operation was the theme of a musical suite played at Hunter college the other night. The score, obviously, took a lot of cutting. _ • _. “Muted strings symbolized the pa tient's concerns," says an explana tion of the composition. “Wood winds and brasses depicted the ac tions of the surgeons. Classical tonal patterns described the fanta sics of the patient under anesthe sia.” H . V a n H y n ln g , R t . 1, B o x 510, B e a v e r t o n , O re. P h o n e B e a v e r to n 3153. OOO c a s h . B o x 14 1 , L o n g B e a e h , W n . 'I' ii C G I'R T : Hu 9'iW, y e ir l y net Incom e 26000. g u n its und io v ely new hom e. E lec, lo u t In hom e and 2 u n its, bal. oil h eat. 241,500 In c lu d e s fu rn itu re, lin en , e tc even In Al AUTOS. TRUCKS & ACCES. OYER good ground. For qu ick s a le 220.000. 215,000 dw n. T erm s on b.il . or 2 l9 ,- D E A L E R S— LOGGERS 3 0 0 T R U C K S C L O S IN G OUT 2995— On fiv e or m ore 1942 A '45 HMC 2(4 ton 6zl! ten w h eel lo n g A sh ort w h eel b a se ca rg o 's. W on d erfu l c o n d itio n . e x cid le n t tir e s, low m ilea g e. M ust se e to ap p reciate. O ther tru ck s to c h o o se from . O ffer» accep ted . E a sy term s. V I R G IL 'S 1101 S T E W A R T . S E A T T L E , W N . Proof’s the Thing “Pardner,” said the Western rancher, "where'd yuh move from?” ••nilnoli.” 'Illinois, heh? How come you leave a settled country like that and come to these lonesome hills?” "Well, sir. my neighbors got to sayin’ mean things about me." “Why didn’t you challenge them to prove their glanderous state ments?” "I did And they did.” Early Fire Engines Many early fire engines were de stroyed by fire because the short range of the hose stream made it necessary to take the apparatus too close to the flames. Artificial Sugar First radioactive sugar made by the photosynthetic process has been produced at University of Califor nia. Famous Salt Hills The province of Barahona in the Dominican republic is famous for its salt hills, which are covered with precious alabaster. home. 225.000 financed, f o r d s sa le m health H n tc h c r o ft A g e n c y , M c M in n v ille , O reg o n . FO R LEAKE Lm ig e sta b lls b s d and g r o ce ry . W ell equip ped, good bUMlmss. L ocated In N orth C en tral W a sh in g to n Good deal for rig h t person te r e ste d v r l l e P .O . B o x 3 5 1 , og a n , W ash . m eat d oin g b u sy tow n . If In O kan "A G U I D E TO O P P O R T U N IT Y !• M a n u fa ctu rin g fo rm u la s, trad e s e c rets. .special lip s. F ree fo lio . D ept. C. S p e c ia lty S a le s, 3505 J e f f e r s o n , B o is e , Id a h o . N E W ST O R E B U IL D IN G for s a le in Pug< t I n<2 in pin p< io com munity. Priced to se ll. A real o p p o r tu n ity . For d e ta ils w rite Xtueh M e r r ill. H lw a y G rocery, P alm er. Wn. Believed in Pixies Ancient Pompeii millers believed in pixies. A painting which hung at the entrance to the PoinpciUn Par thenon in 79 A. D. shows seven pixies at work or resting in the mill. Rare Heron Added to Zoo An Egyptian shoe-bill heron, n member of the stork family, has been added to the San Diego zoo. The birds are distinguished by their huge armored beaks, more than a foot in length and five inches wide, which resembles a large clam- shaped wooden shoe. These birds are difficult to capture and are found only in the swampy upper regions of the White Nile, Those Electric Farms Over half of the nation’s 5 8 mil lion farms now have electricity, compared with only a third In 1940 and a seventh In 1930. York, Educational Center York, the famous capital of the largest of English counties, has been famous for education ever since the ninth century, when one of its leading citizens, Alcuin, was tutor of the Emperor Charlemagne. Nevertheless, it was not until 1632 that the idea occurred to anyone of establishing a university for the vast area of Yorkshire. Doing Hla Part Mixed Metaphor Down In the swamplands two boys were caught operating a big moon shine still. “We 'uns ain't moonshiners," pro tested one of the youngsters; "we Hr Jest a-tendin’ this here still for Uncle Sorky Peters." "Why doesn’t Peters run his own itill?” demanded the revenue offi cer. "Oh, he air in town this week,” explained the older boy: “He'e a settln’ on the grand Jury. Pretty and shapely, and with at air of sweet trustfulness, she wai bent on purchasing a sweater. Th< susceptible young clerk eagerly dfs played his stock. "Now this," said he, holding uj a garment, “is just the thing foi you, worth twice the money. It li the latest design, fast colors, long wearing, won’t shrink, and it’s i good yarn." "Yes," came the soft rejoinder "and very weU told, too,”