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About Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919 | View Entire Issue (July 18, 1901)
Humors They Ukt possession, of the body, and are Lord of Mitral. They are attended by pimples, bolls, the Itching tetter, aalt rheum, and other en. taneous eruptions; by feelings of weakness, laniruor, general debility and what not. They causa mora suffering than-anything else. Health, Strength, Peace and Pleasure . require their expulsion, and this Is poel Urly effected, according 4o thousands of gratoul testimonials, by Hood's Sarsaparilla Which radically and permanently drives them out and builds up the whole system. Signs of Spring. "Have yon hoard a robin yet?" "No, but Ie'wrt '" woman with her head tied up in a towel beating a carpet in the back yard." Sffm thm Ooa) awaf Mfe Oft t OaM. Laxative Broreo-Quinlne Teolets euro a cold In one day. Ko cure. Ko fay. Price ii oonta, . , Wanted te Know, , ., . Papa Oh, noi -AVashington jvever told a lie. Johnny Who attended to that part of his strategy for him, pa? Haltt'a aeaeal. " A t Menlo Park, San Mateo Ceenty, Cal., wllh Its teeutilnl, surroundings, perfect climate, earelul snperrlston, thorough Instruction, complete laboratorif. and grmnasiasa, easily maintains its positron in the front rank of schools for bovt on the Pacifle Coast. Ira . Hoitt, Ph. P., Principal. . O tarty Troe. "What do think of this idea that Mar? is sending signals?" asked Mr. Beeehwood. " "There's nothing on earth in it!" replied Mr. Homewood, emphatically. Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow's 8ooth. Ins; Syrup the best remedy to use tor their children during the teething period. Mil Reason. First Tramp. Why didn't yer wipe dat feller's chainless bicycle datyer went after last might? .. Second Tramp Well, I found out dere was a chainless dorg in de yard. FITS it Oa tftwlntw'i of nr. KliaVfGmU Kara bmmI tar PR S E SXM trul botticuMi tmt. Raton if. Da.1 CvLU kul.U,UI archaiUfhilwblshie.Pa. Revolution of VitchU1U. The main wheel of a watch makes 1,460 revolutons in a year ; the second or center wheel, 8,760; the third wheel, 70,080; the fourth wheel, 525, 600; and the fifth or scape , wheel, 4,731,860. Beware of Oiatsaaata for Catarrh That Coatala Karcary, As mercury will surely destroy the sense of smell and completely derange the whole sys tem when entering it through the mucous sur faces. Such article should nerer bo used ex cept on prescriptions from reputable physi cians, as the damage they will do is ten fold to the good yon can possibly derive from them. Hall's Catarrh Cure, manufactured by F. J. Cheney Co.,-Toledo.O.,containand mercury, and is taken internally, acting directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces, of the aystem. In buying Hall's Catarrh Cure sure you get the genuine., It is taken internally, and made In Toledo, Ohio, hyF. J. Cheney A Co. Testi monials free. Sold br Druggists, price 75c. per bottle. Ball's Family Pills are the beat. Dowa ia ths Stogie Belt ";" Visitor Do you - ever -hare ' sniokeTeonsumera in Pittsber any ... PittsbargerrTes ; each resident consumes his own share. . J- This signature is oa erery bos of the geaalne Laxative Brorno-Quinine tm toe remedy that eenree M t stay Spring Shades. "Nature is painting the world with generous coats of green," remarked Mrs. Bellefield, as she sat on her porch and watched the rain falling on the .grass and young leaved trees. "And using watercolors," added Mr. Bellefield. : -', "V, Mama Eats a Casearet.-- . Baby gets the benefit. Nursing mothers make their milk mildly purgative with Cascarets, the onW safe laxative tor babies. All druggists, 10c, 25c, 50c. - ' Progress Among Florida Negroes'. An industrial school for. Negroes is promised, in Florida, thus putting that state on a par with other . of the southern states in the education of the colored people. Do You Keep Horses, Or cattle, sheep or pigs? If so you want good fences. Send for free book : and pictures telling about the best and cheapest fences on earth. Port land Anchor Fence Co., 742 Nicolai , street, Portland, Oregon. Later. Again the two illustrious men met. "McSweeney," said the governor of North Carolina to the governor of South Carolina, with deep solemnity, "have you joined the Buffaloes?" Scrofula ia an unwelcome legacy, but one which the children of blood poisoned parentage most accept, with all ita humiliating consequences. It ia an inheritance that makes one poorer; that brings wretchedness and disease instead of health and riches, for the child whose ancestral blood is tainted with Scrofula or the loathsome virus of Contagious Blood Poison ia unfitted for the arduous duties of life so Ion? as anr of the transmitted rjoison remains in its veins. Scrofula manifests itself in various forms; swollen glands about the neck and throat, catarrh of the head, weak eyes, hip bone disease, white swelling and offensive sores and abscesses are familiar symptoms, attended usually witE loss of strength, poor digestion and pale or bloodless complexion. The skin is sometimes most dreadfully affected, eruptions breaking out on all parts of the body. 6crof ula destroys bone, tissue and flesh ; no part of the human system escapes its ' When nineteen years old, and about one year after th birth of my flxat ohild, th glands on the left aide of ray naek began to swell. Four of the places war lanoed and became open runnlnr ores; rising's came under my left arm, and ths dlsoharga was simply awful. Xiie doctors eeld I bad the warat case of Borofula they had erer Men. I took Iodide of potassium, but this nor th other drugs glTen for this disease brought relief, when the phyaioiana advised mo to have the glands removed, Z deelded to try B. 0. A few bottlea eared sne completely; no signs of th terrible disease are left. 2S. &IOHABD 'WAS SON, Golden Corners, Ohio. . jrarlty to the profoundly poisoned blood, and the rich, strong blood that is carried to the swollen and diseased glands absorbs and destroys the tuberculous deposits, and the painful, disfiguring sores and other evidences of Scrofula disappear. .8. S. 8. should be begun immediately upon the appearance of the first symp toms, or where there is a known predisposition to Scrofula. Our medical depart ment will be found of great help to those who are struggling with this wasting disease of heredity or any other blood Sould you or any member of your family seed advice, our physicians will cheer ly give the formation you desire, for which we make no charge. Book oa gtaod and Ckin Diseases free. TUB SWIFT SPECIFIC COMPANY, ATLANTA, OA. . Natural csvsts. . Juryman i ea, -we bretrtiw sn . terdict of death from natural causes. Reporter But an iron beam fell on him from the fourth floor! Juryman Of course. Wasn't that natural? You wouldn't expect it to fall up on the eighth floor, would you? That's where he ought to have been at work instead of down in th? basement. . . , Her lota. Miss Bridesoon What is your-idea (f the ideal lover? - V . Mist Yellow-leaf The ontwW'fhar rles, Ij : " i t-': H , The Trest Protean. J To a thoughtful mind, the trust problem is one of serious import. It must be firmly grappled with, for, it creep ypoii ofiay before tou are aware of its'isPNie.' hi this respect much resembling the vanou disorders which taok the. stomach, such as constipation, (MdipnUou, dyspepsia, bil iousness, liver stnl kidney troubles. Hos tetters Stomach Bitters is the one reliable remedy for all such ailments. Be sure to give it a trial. ;- i Perils at the rNoks, $ , . Three expeditions are trying- to locate the south pole, and six are after the one at the other end of the world. This ; trleana nine new faces on the lecture platform next year. FQBTUHE'S Mil. ' ; '- ' THE UPS AND DOWNS IN THE LIFE OF A CLERK. A Tale af Misfortune and Misery Wlta a Happy Baaing-The World Smed Alt Tory Dark for a White. A clerk'a life, ordinarily, is a very humdrum one with but very little variety to the daily routine. But Mr. Fred B. Mortou of No. 80 Vesper street, Portland Me., had an experi ence recently which has made his life now a very happy one. Intelling a reporter of what he went through he said: 1 had been suffering with stomach trouble for about two years. Every day about ten o'clock in the morning and three o'clock in the afternoon I became faint and felt so bad that if I did not sit down I would fall. That sensation usually lasted for about an hour and when noon came I had no appetite for lunch. s ,. "I saw Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for Pale People advertised in the daily papers about a year ago and decided to try them. I felt relief from the first box and after I had taken six boxes my disease was cured. I do not take them now but always keep them in the house. I have told my frienda what these pills have done for me and should I know of any one's being sick aa I was I -should recommend Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for Tale People. " Mr. Morton's statement was pub lished in the Portland Express after he had sworn to it before Marshall H. Purrington, a notary public. The most effective remedy in the world in cases of this kind is Dr. Wil liams' Pink Pills for Pale PeopJe, They act directly on the blood and nerves. This makes them invaluable not only for stomach troutle but also for such diseases aa locomotor ataxia, partial paralysis, St. .Vitus' dance, sciatica, neuralgia, rheumatism, nervous headache, , the after effects of the grip, palpitation of the heart, pale and sallow complexions and all forms of weakness either in male or female. Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for Pale People are sold by all deal ers, or will be sent postpaid on receipt of price, fifty cents a box, or six boxes for two dollars and fifty cents (they are never sold in bulk orby the hun dred) by addressing, Dr. ..Williams Medicine Co., Schenectady; N. Y. SUtion for Observing Earthquakes. The academy of science at Vienna has resolved to establish a novel sta tion for the observation ot . earth quakes, in a silver mine 100 meters below the' surface. ' " fOU KNOW WHAT TOU ABB TAKING When vou take Grore's Tasteless Chill Tonic, because the formula is plainly printed on erery bottle showing that it is simply Iron snd Qui nine in a tasteless form, so cure, ir ray. toe. No Risk. Mistress I wouldn't hold the baby so near the tiger's cage,. Nora. Nora (the nurse) There's no risk, mum. th' tiger is a "man eater,' and th child is a gur-rul. I am sure Piso's Cure for Consumption saved my life three years ago. Mas. Thos. Kobbins, Maple street, Norwich, N. Y., Feb. 17,1900. Her Lack. The Illinois woman who called her husband a jackass and then got mad because he called her his better half does not seem to know such a thing as justice. withering, benumbing touch. Parents whor blood ia pois oned by their own misdeeds, or who themselves may be suffering for the sins of some remote ancestor, must re store their own blood to its normal purity and strength, or they cannot expect healthy, robust children. S. S. S. cures Scrofula, like other diseases of a deep sea ted, constitutional charac ter, by restoring life and trouble, and we Invite you to write us. Kip LITTLE JIMUFIUEND. BOY'S FATHER WOUUO -KspAUT- WITH MOLLY. NOT thoaa:h Oaty a Caw the Had a Heart tCapableof reeling Grief for an Ab sent CasapValea and Frlead-A Pa IlifcCc Friendship. ' ; ; ;S.':8rrt Molly ain't "Just one o' tha cows.' She's tfur friend. Is Molly, an I've reason to. say It, I have. "Tell yott, airt Why o' course. If yt care to. hear.-' When Molly was a bit of a calf, hardly a year old. my little Jim was 3, an' afraid o' nothing-, big or lit tle. Toddlia attet rue all day.loug. he'd aWit tlre Woviwan' our little bit of a garden an the pastur" behind, an' never tiring of It; an' when 1 mowed or raked the grass or hoed the garden he was alwns a-helpln. But above all be loved to be held up to ;se Molly or to "pet r'l.-vwed'td hold her soft .nose down for him . when . he kissed her 'good night,' an' the firs' thing In the morn In', before he was downstairs, when I'd let the cows out to the pasta', his curly head was half out o' the winder an' he a-callln", 'liood morula', Molly. ! - "He was hardly 5 years okl-no, he wasn't f when he used to try an' milk her; an the cretnr'd stand as gentle an' still as If she knew the little feller'd be easy hurt, with, her head turned half sideways, a-eeerolu' to say, "AU right, young 'un, as long aa It amuses your I had to finish the mllkln', the little hands got so tired; yet he hated to give In. You wouldn't 'a' believe It, sir, to see the spunky way that little chap o' $ years would stick to It a-mllkln that cow! 'Daytimes, when sne was Jn the gaa tur. he was alwus a-runnln down to .the gate to ask her how she was get tin on to-day, or did she think ft was goin' to rain? an' things like that makln' a reg'Iar playmate out o her; 'cause he was our only child an' I spose some times he was lonely like! An' to see him take out a drink o' water to Molly in his little tin dipper! I used to 'most bust a-laughln' to see her big red tongue a-lappln' out the few drops he'd gen'ly have left, as If It was just what she wanted! "Well, Jim wss only 8 year old when he was took sick, suddent. Lord knows what It was! We don't, an' the doctor never did, 'though alwus a-lookln' wise an' a-saytn' he'd be out 'roun' In a few days. But Jim, lyln there burnln with fever, would bear the low 'Moo-oo!' an his eyes, would open an' look bright as he'd smile an' say, 'Good-night, Molly! I'll see you In the morutogV "But that Molly! The first night he was sick she kep look in' 'roun' when I was a-milkm' her, as If to see where he was yes, she did, slri ah', was that oneasy I could scarce milk her at all. Then the sex' night she was nervous an' shivery an' gave hardly any milk; an' her lowln" was awful frequent through the day, but at night, when she was In the barn. It was terrible! an' htoimd tt" wonld make you 'creepy' to hear her; an' the milk scarcer every day till the cretur was right sick, too. . "Well, -there '.came- one night one night when there was nothln' to do for my little Jim but to stand beside him, when we didn't need no doctor to tell us our little lad would never be out 'roun again; an' In the qniet o' the'mld dle o' the night the ticktn' of the clock an' his mother's sobbln' sounded fear ful loud.; 'His little hand lay in mine, so cold and still now, when It had been so res'Iess an hot for more'n a week. Suddenly It moved a little, as In the stillness outside .we heard Molly's 'Moo-oor Just like a call to the boy, right under his winder. "I'd forgot to milk her or go for her, an' somehow or other alie'd got out o' the pastur herself. 'Moo-oo!' she cal!ed again, so pitiful an' humanlike the tears come Into my eyes, though they had been hot an' dry all night. Then what she called the third time it seemed to reach even to little Jim. Too weak to open bis eyes, he said, just wblsperln': "Good-night, Molly! In the mornlh'! an' smiled. "Hard as It was to leave him then, I laid his little band down an' went out to Molly. , , . '" 'Die'.' ''Ko't a bit of It, sfr'-Tbat's him, that little chap a-comln' thro' the gate; an' that's Molly a-follerin' him. 'A meracle,' the doctor says. I don't know; I ain't up on raerac!es; but Come here, Jim! That's right; take off your cap to the gentleman an' shake hands. Now go long an' put Molly in. He's a dandy, sir, my Jim! "What! 'Sell Molly? Sell her, s!r? Xo, sir! No, sir! Not for all her weight in solid gold'd I sell my little Jim's friend." The Housewife. THE LUXURY-LOVING HOOLEY. Since His Bankruptcy He Haa Been Living Extravagantly. It is now three years since the fall, ure of E, .T, Hooley, whose estate has yielded so far only 50 cents In the pound to his creditors. In. view of the magnificence with which this splendid bankrupt continues meanwhile to enjoy life, inquiries bave been made as to the future prospects the estate offers. George . Hardy, a member of the bankruptcy committee appointed by the creditors to act under the super vision of the board of trade, when ques tioned as to the outlook for creditors, expressed the belief that the estate would yield another 2 shillings In the pound In the course of a few months, and was exceedingly pessimistic as to anything beyond that, says the London MalL "Mr. Hooley bears his creditors' mis fortunes bravely, does he not?" "In what way?" "He still lives at the rate of a few 4-t, A m m WAOf )" tiUUO(AA a J . , . "More than la few thousands," re plied Mr. Hardy. "He has, besides his suite of rooms at Walslngham House, his two country seats-Pap-worth Hall and Risley Hall. Why, he pays In wages to his servants, male and female, and his gardeners, grooms and the rest, more than $30,000 yearly. His weekly wages bill, apart from those he pays monthly or quarterly, is between $000 and $650. He keeps many horses and every sort of vehicle from a dog cart to a shooting coach; be has about More ef gardener at rapwortn alone; he la constantly adding to his estate there , by buying up Adjoining farii, ,and recently he bought 110.000 worth of additional agricultural ma chinery for his operations there, ' Ilia wine cellar contain one of the moat extraordinary collections ever got together,- and you may say on my eatl mate, as a member of th committee, that this princely bankrupt la not liv ing at th rat of lea than $75,000 yearly. "But haven't you, and your fellow committeemen any meant of diverting some of this income toward the cred itors r "None at all' Mr. Hooley obtains hi Income. by the financial operations he conducts from Walslngham House, where h see clients dally. But he doesnt deal on his own behalf. lie la th agent of hla wife. I have long contended that we, the commltte. ahould b able to control the bankrupt's earning. W ought to be able to se cure for th creditor th remainder of that income after allowing th bank rupt a good maintenance say f '.3,000 a year. . , "And do your powers enable you to do anything In that directlonr "No, but I have heard front a very reltahl quarter that as on result of this Hooley business legislation will be proposed with the object of rendering such crying scandals Impossible In th future,- ' v. asansawSaaaSBSBaiiBBanBnBVSiBBBnaatsaBasaseaBS QUEEN ALEXANDRA'S AUTO. Boyat Lady Takes Great Pleaenr In Driving the Machine. Queen Alexandra has become possess ed of a vtctorlett. which she has learn ed to drive herself. Seated for two. Its framework Is articulated, so that It adapts Itself to any unevenness of road without stress or strain. The single motor is of 4 horse power, of four pole type, and can be worked to five times normal capacity without any Injurious effects. . The batteries are fitted In the rear portion ot the carriage, and contain sufficient energy for thirty-five or forty miles oa one charge. The car Is elec trically Ut and fitted with japanned lamps, relieved with silver plate fit tings: the wheels 'are of bicycle type, and fitted with 3-Inch pneumatic tires. 8 peed of car Is from six miles to four teen mile per hour. ' The Queen herself haa become an ex pert driver, and derives great pleasure from this pleasing little vehicle, which Is now quite familiar In the neighbor hood of Sandringham. OLD GENTLEMAN'S MISTAKE. He latendel to l"e Kind bnt Was Mia amleritnod. He Is a fine old gentleman, every one who takes daily trips on the street car line will say so. He Is kindly con siderate of the rights of his fellow pas sengers, and, though he usually occu pies the end seat, it is not beta use he Insist upon having, hut because bis fel low passengers insist that he shall have it His politeness, Is .of the old. old school, awl his deference to the ladles Is beautiful to behold, says the Ind an apolis News. He has been seen time and again when the conductor. . slow or remiss Iq his attention to wom en with babies and washerwomen with baskets to assist In taking them, with tbelr Incumbrances, off and on the car. In view of these things, the happening of yesterday was pathetic. A young woman, Indeed an extremely bandome aud well-dressed young wom an, was seated before him. The o'.d gentleman wboe eyesight Is no longer of. the clearest noticed a bug in the knot of balr bunched above the white neck of the fair young .woman a shining, green bug, nearly as large as one's thumb nail. He leaned forward to per form an act of kindness; he would brush the Insect away. He brushed. The bug, te his view, but took a firmer clasp on its lodging place. The old gentleman made a second at tempt. With thumb and finger he seized the insect and pulled vigorously. The young woman turned at this; fire was In her radiant eyes, anger In her voice, ghe uttered but one word "S-l-r!" It was enough. The old gentleman was parlyzed. He attempted to ex plain, but his tongue refused to make an articulate sound. Covered with con fusion he touched the electric button and alighted at the next crossing. A few of the passengers smiled; one or two even laughed. The bug was a Brazilian beetle attached to a long pin In the young woman's bair. Stated the Case Plainly. Here Is a letter from W. O. Towns end, a farmer llviQg.on the Santa Fe near Marcellne, ' Kan"., which brought Immediate settlement when received by the claims department of that rail road: !. , "Dear Sir I have only one wife and five chlldrenno mother-in-law. , Iast Monday night, about two and one-half miles east of Marcellne, the cars bit Spot on her caboose end We found her Tuesday morning,;- April 10; she was as dead as a dirty doormat She left a son to low for hen Spot was a common 10-year-old Mussie Fork cow, worth $25.' She was a fair milk er; of a kind disposition. During the seven years we owned her she never bit any of the children. Please send me $25 tout I iii&y get a COW, ao we cau have milk for that calf and children, and obllgo." . ' Saloons In Guatemala. The Republic of Guatemala has over 16,000 saloons and taverns. During the first six months of mar ried life, a woman thinks so much of her husband that she is willing to cook what he likes, and this Is the time In her housekeeping career when she doesn't knew how. To CJcihara of Largo Families la this workaday world few worn are so plaoed thai physical exertion Is not constantly demanded of them It their dally life. W make a special appeal to mo then ot large families whoae work is itevei done, and many of whom suffer, an auffer for lack of intelligent aid. ' To women, young or old, rich oi poor, we extend aa Invitation to accept tree advio. Oh, women I do not Ut Has. Oaaani Batxavrua. your Uvea be sacrificed when a word of advice at the first approach of weak ness, may fill your future years with healthy Joy. Address a letter to Mrs. Ptnkham's Laboratory, Lynn Mass., and you will not be disappointed. "When 1 began to take Lydla R. Pinkham'a Vegetable Compound I wai not able to do my housework. I suf fered terribly at time of menstruation. Several doctor told sne they could dc nothing for me. Thanks to the Pink ham advice and medicine I am now well, and caa do the work for eight 1 the family. " I would recommend Lydla E. rink ham's Vegetable Compound to all mothers with large families." Mr. Caksii Rxujiviixk, Ludlngton, Mich Made a Mistake. Patient Doctor, would you mind stopping at the drug store and pay ing for this prescription. I'mshort of change. Doctor (hurridly rriting another prescription) Excuse me. I road a mistake. You don't need any nerve medicine. TO OCRS A COLD IN OMB DAY Take laxatlre Promo Quinine Tablets. All Iruretsta refund the mouev it it falls to core. K. W. Oroya's signature is on each boa. Uo. m Th Saucer's ths Thing. Mustache cupsT'said the clerk in the chinaware department. "Yes, sir. Here's a pretty design. Cup and saucer, one forty-nine." "But," said Mr. Porque Faeque, "that ain't the saucer that goes with it." "O, yes." "Not much it ain't. There ain't nd mustache guard on it." tl Stopped His Paper. "Sir!" exclaimed the oldest citizen as lie walked into tlie business office qf the daily paper, "I see in your sheet of today, sir, an article to which I take exceptipus, . and , I want my paper stopped, sir! And when James F, Andersoi says stop, sir, he means stop, sir!" "Phil," wearily murmured the cir culation manager, "go out and tell Bob't' stop th' press an lock up; o'l man Anderson has quit us!" Not Cold Blooded. Gotham ite I suppose you may think we New Yorkers are rather severe on your Boston girls when we speak of their cold bloodedness? Hubbtie Not at all; so many of your fellows have been frozen' out by them you know. Didn't Like It "What does the teacher say when you don't know your lessons?" asked Willie's father. "She says I must be a chip oft the old blockhead," replied Willie, and then something happened. Equal to the Occasion.' Liveried Menial Me Lud, the car riage waits without. His Lordship Without what? "Without horses, me Lud ; 'tis an automobile." , Social Training Miss Gotrichk wick Please, Sir, is this a training school? Principal It is. "Please, Sir, I wish to learn how to eat olives." k ... . ,v:v.. xs.;.N..s.-csx5is:-. w( Jvk. . The Kind You Have Always Bought has borne the signa ture of Chas. II. Fletcher, and lias been made under his personal supervision for over 30 years. Allow no ono . to deceive you la this. Counterfeits, Imitations and - Jnst-as-good" are butTxperiments, and endanger tho health of Children Experience against Experiment. What is CASTORIA Castoria Is a harmless substitute for Castor Oil, Pare goric, Drops and Sootliinfr Syrups. It Is Pleasant. It contains .neither Opium, Morphine nor other Harcotlc substance. Its aer is Its guarantee. It destroys Worms and allays Fcverishness. It cures Diarrhoea and Wind Colic. It relieves Teethintr Troubles, cures Constipation and Flatulency. It assimilates the Food, repulates the Stomach and Dowels, ervlnj? healthy and natural sleep. The Children's Panacea The mother's Friend. The Kind You.HaYe Always Bought Si Bears the In Use For Over 30 -Years. ths? etnr.ua ommy. vr stuaaav eracrr. New vatia crrv. 21 A Vat Rep, Flushing Didn't you join another Don't Worry club last week, Harriet? Mr. Flushiw Yes; 1 hope you don't object to Af belonging to two Don't Worry clubs, Henry, Flushing (abjectly) Oh, no, liar rite; but I had hoped that they would keep you from worrying nt somewhat! Cltar ut a Key. "Lucy, where's that other tall beau you used to have?" "Laws, Miss Nancy, I don went back on dat man ; h didn't have no taste at all. Dat man wore silver shirt studs when ha had a gol' front toof." Family BerMvsnMnt. "Ant apart orphan now? asked the chick of the hen. "What do you mean?" inquired the hen. "Th Incubator was liirned last night," answered th chick. Horror! ef Wsr. "Hut what," asked on of the mys tified listeners, "could the gold stand ard have to do with the capture of Aguinaldo?" "Don't you see," said the excited talker, "that Funston was after the yellow boys?" ; Beuatf te Ba Heard. Jester I understand our pastor is going to preach through a megaphone hereafter, , Jimaon Why is that? Jester Why, the sleeping mem bers of the congregation snore so loudly that th others can't hear. . The Is Tamlly. t The Leo faimly, which, until the civil war, had always been represent ed in the army, was until thefrninh war without a single member in the regular service. Now there are two Lees in the army and th third will also probably soon wear his shoulder straps. la Bast Praaartptlaa far Malaria Chills and rever te a betUe of drover Tasteless OhIU Toole. It is simply Iron end quinine la a lasieiees wrtu. no v ur. no ray, rrtoe MM. The Automobile. "Will th automobile become a permanent fad?" "Doubtful. See how men, outside of scorchers, even,' were bent on rid ing the bicycle at first; and look at it now." Josh's Future. "I guess maybe Josh is goin' to be a great financier, an' git money by his brains," remarked Farmer Corn tossel. "Does he take such an interest in commercial affairs?" "No; but he's got to get a livin' somehow, an' he jest won't work." FARM MACHINERY AND SUPPLIES. FREE TO FARMERS Our 1901 Vehicle Book Our 1901 Implement Catalogue JUST ISSUED. "end yonr name and P. O. address and wt will mall one or both, at desired, free of all charge. Mitchell, Lewis & Staver Co yirtt aad Taylor Sis. PORTLAND, OB, GEiSLER PATENTS COMPANY. Chamber of Commerce, PORTLAND, OREGON Signature of r , J f In (. "t1 i L r -. ii--''-" "- i 4 .. e4 i. "Ply wire had ataaalae ar faee, but the has beoa taklae CAfOAKKT! aad Uoy tare all disappeared. I bad twaa trouble vita ewiatliiaitoa foe some time, but after tek. In tbe drat Caeearet I have had no trouble ita tnis aliment. re eannns apeaa toe aiga- If of ramareta." fnso Wkih, MS Oesa tew. Ave.. I'aUadelpele, Fa Pleasant Psteiabi, fint. Taste dons'. te kw4, Meter Stotea, Weakm. of tiri. Wu, tae.tt. ... OURK CONSTIPATION. ... ttareot r t r, ta.s. trMi. s Im. ut MTfl ll SnM e rHiranuee b all an A Choke. "What is it this morning!" asked the new waitress. "Ham and eggs, isn't itt" "Not exactly," suld the boarding house mistress, "and I want you to work this well. You must be careful to say to each boarder, 'Ham or egg.?" IN THE DE.G1NNING TRUIWa3 6NI.T6NK( SLICKER ttMl THIsTIAIlKARt TO )TU ft K rMI M Ttt DUST OILED CLOTHING. flstaaxa mavwistea. stwast of miTATiOMX catalogue) rait jnOVVtNd FULL UN6 Of (iADflf N T J AND HAT A A.J.TOWtfi CO. BCttT0N.MA33 Where do You Sell Your hides? THrme, We always pay the lllihest Prlre. Ohms t MaaUok A Co 75 Front St., cor. Oak, Portland, Or. IE! Is best time to enre Catarrh, Hronehltis and Consumption, Our rani.dr Is narsnied, l, r. u. i Hoe19. W. H. SMITH I CO., Buffalo. N.Y. it LEAD With one Lever Raising snd Lowering Device. Laichhaa Root Conoavo DHvo Wheal Light Draft CATALOG CE FRF.C. J. A. FREEMAN, Gen'l Agt. 990C Wmiftt., PmHImnd, Orm. Complete Stock of Water A. Wood Extras. Secures patents for Inventions In the t nltut States and fureiRii cimntrlrs. Also negotiates mar kets and defends patent inven tions. No better terms or facilities than we offer obtainable any where. Payment of our fops maf be deterred till patent Is allowed. Write for pamphlet. The Vonder of the (ge Ti e (rest Airship, t feet lonir and M high, now building at San Krsncl.nn, Cali fornia, will make Its tint voyage about Sep tember .th. KVKKY OMC should have a few HH ARES. They ere now selliuf at t'.OO a share, and will lie worth 1100 alter the i 3 3 ship has mad her first voyage. Hend orders for stock with check or money onlrr to Cal. Aerial Navigation Co., care of Columbian Banking Co., Han Franolsco, Cal, Hotel FlavaS Opens for season June 28, 1901. Col. J. F. Harvey, Manager TH1 "MONTKRKY" OF OREGON. Most beautiful and perfectly equipped sum mer resort. Kvery convenluncu and comfort. Free bus from hotel to surf. Bathing, tlshing, dancing, bowling. A splendid hotel with lovely surroundings. Under new menaireineut this year. For raU-t and reservations address HOTEL FLAVELt Hrnvml, Of. Of J. L. MITCHELL, 018 Margumnt Bldg., Portland, Orm, Springtime Resolutions TAKE TUK ileaioy Curo Sure relief fiom liquor, opium and tobaooe . name, bend lor particulars to leeley litetlhita Moved to 420 Williams IRSlllUIB, Ave., Kast Side. JOHN POOLE, Portland, Oregon, Foot of Morrison Street, Can give you the .best bargains in Buggies, Plowi, Boilers and Engines, Win.lmillt and Pufnps and General Machinery. See as before buying M. F. V. Bi" He. Si-1001. WHEN writing t advertisers please asatiUoa this paper. . , t7 canoy 1 1 Viii CATHARTIC 'Ss rat mm ssxamaee Milwaukee Binders