Southwest Oregon recorder., January 20, 1885, Image 2

WAXING AND WANING,
Hope and .the snn are as one j
Both largest when they rise;
They shrink alike from morn till noon,
As life grows old and wise. -.. "
With what unbounded hope the boy
Begins his world-careerl
How wondrous large and bright with joy
' Do rising suns appear!
Bat as the sun grows less and less-
And paler as they climb
The vacant sky, so we confess ,
The cold deceits of time.
Our boyhood hopes will shrink and fad
As boyhood drifts away,
And one by one to rest are laid
The Tailures of the day.
And yet the sun at noon that turns
Its downward course will grow and grow,
Till in the wett it rolls and bums.
As large as half a day ago.
So, as we hear that other sphere,
The early hope revives,
That all we thought was ours here
Hay be, in other lives.
Harper's Weekly.
LEFT BEHIND.
It was 10 o'clock of a July morning,
and the largest fraction of humanity had
been some hours earning its daily bread.
The idlers had just risen from the break
fast table. To this latter class belonged
the young man who leaned lazily on the
Eiazza railing, and looked absently out on
ake Winnipake. Beside him in a huge
chair, sat a little woman rocking to and
fro, with, an untiring movement, and
with deft fingers plying in and out
among bright silk and crewels. She was
idle, too, in her woman's laborious way,
but there was a lack of repose in her in
dolence that made it restful to turn again
to her brother, who stood in statuesque
inaction, looking into the still water
below.
"What are you going to do, to-day ?"
the little woman asked.
'Nothing."
"There's a great deal going on, and
very nice sort of people, too. Do you
see that pretty girl down there at the
landing ?"
The one with red ?'
"Yes, don't you think she's pretty I"
: "I hadn't thought of it."
"Well, she is remarkably. Wouldn't
you like to meet her ? I could easily
manage it."
"I'm not particular. Is she worth
while ?"
"Ben, you' exasperate me. Do you
take an interest in anything ?"
"I don't do anything else m Wall
6treet. Tm off duty now. I believe in
resting in a philosophical sort of a way."
"Well, I suppose you are tired, poor
fellow ! I know how you feel. I am
tired myself most of the time."
. "Tired! I look like it," laughed the
young man. 'Til tell you how it is; I
simrfly want my liberty. It doesn't pay
this dancing attention on half a dozen
girls w hom you never see again."
"Oh, wtll.don't, then."
Ben Adams at twenty-one haa per
formed his social duties with great zest.
Four years later he was stili heart whole,
and beginning to take a purely fraternal
interest in blushing debutautes. He
danced lessand went to the opera alone,
or with his friend Rutland, a confirmed
bachelor of twenty-nine. With entire
resignation young Adams acted as usher
at many fashionable weddings, and with
out a sigh saw Catharine, Kate andIvitty
led down the aisle by other men. And
so he approached his thirties and within
a year of them leaned idly over the
piazza railing at Lake Winnipake, and
declared to his sister that "Itobinson
Crusoe was the luckiest fellow of his ac
quaintance. Give me a desert
isle for a summer sojourn. What would
refresh a man like 'going back to savag
ery!" "I don't think it would be enough of
a change to benefit some I know,"
laughed his sister. "Well, Ben, all I
can say is, you are very different from
what you use to be."
In the meanwhile the boat below
pushed off, and Adams followed it with hi3
eyes, chiefly because it would have been
more trouble to look another way. The
young lady in the stern was Miss Joseph
ine Vail, and the boy at the oars wa3 her
twelve-year-old brother. Josephine was
a young lady of views supported by more
or less logic and by what some thought
an extremely pretty face. Her enemies
but she had none- would have said
that while she despised conventionalities
no one was more annoyed when obliged
, to disregard them, and while she re
sented the protecting limitations of her
sex, she was quite willing to accept the
attentions based on the theory of their
existence. Iler father said one dav:
"Nothing would take the kinks out of
Josephine like settling down with a good
husband." The young lady took it in
high dudgeon, and went away meekly to
wonder if it were tme. On this par
ticular July morning Josephine accepted
her brother Tom's services as oarsman,
not because she was not perfectly able to
row herself, but because it would keep
Tom out of mischief.
" Don't rock the boat, Tom. It doesn't
frighten me, but I can't read."
There was a pause.
44 Row near the bank, in the shade,
Tom." .
Another long pause.
"Say, sis," said Tom at length, "now
we're off, I'll tell you where we're
going."
44 Where you're going? Why, you're
going to take me out for a row."
"Not, much. I'm going two miles
About to see some fellows who are camp
ing out."
"And going to take me ? I think you
$re mistaken, sir. Give me those oars.
"No you don't. Leave 'em alone and I
sit still."
4 'Tom, turn this boat instantly, or I'll
What'U you do ? Come now; you sit
still or I'll "
4 'Tom, there's the Desert Island just
ahead. Don't run into it. Be careful;
you're going straight toward it." .
4 'We might land there," he said,
blandly.
"To be sure we might," said his sister,
glad of anything to divert him from the
first scheme.
"All right, just as you say."
Tom turned his boat toward the great
rock, which lifted its broad back out of
theiwater. It was fitly called the Desert
Isre, for its few square feet of surface
supported not so much as a blade of
grass or a bit of xaoss.
4 -Hop out," said Tom: "I've got to see
to the boat. I guess you can climb up to
the top easy enough."
4 -Of course I can," said Josephine;
"as if I needed your help, you little
monkey."
In a moment she stood at the top of
the rock, and in another moment a de
risive laugh came from below.
"Good-by; J hope you will enjoy your
self. I'll see you later."
Plato says: "A boy is the most
vicious of wild beasts." Plato and Miss
Vail were of one opinion on that point.
She looked about her and took in the
situation. She was monarch of about
twenty-five feet of rough gray rocks, the
sides of which descended abruptly to the
water. Perched high on this 'pedestal,
her figure stood out against the sky in
bold relief. A book and parasol were
her only accessoiies, for by some happy
inspiration she had clung to these. The
sun was high in the heavens, but its hot
rays were mercifully tempered by a soft
breeze on the lake.
Josephine seated lierself, raised her
parasol and opened her book. She faced
the probability that at least two hours of
noondav solitude were before her. The
philosophical course of action was to
make the best of it. But what a situa
tion to be discovered in 1 She remem
bered with satisfaction -that a large
party had gone on a picnic to-day, and
the dowagers left behind were not
given to boating at high noon.
She tried to think how she should
laugh it off if anybody should see her,
but under the most cheerful aspect she
seemed to herself a little ridiculous spec
tacle. To be ridiculous in a good cause
had in it an element of heroism, but the
present situation was one of unmitigated
absurdity, and Josephene Vail always
felt the heroic rather than the comic to
be her forte. Once tears of real vexation
started as her head began to throb in
sympathy with the hot pulsation of the
air about her.
An hour had dragged its length when
Josephene suddenly lifted her head and
listened painfully. A man's veice sing
ing and the splash of oars, and, yes, in
an instant, a boat swung slowly around
the bend. One man sat in it . lazily
singing.
"It's that base creature who watched
us oil this morning. It's a type I detest.
And to think he should sec me here !
It's really more than I can endure." The
girl looked with envy on the tortoise
which slipped easily from the base of the
rock into the water as he heard the dis
turbing sound of oars.
"I hope he'll have the good taste to
suppose I came here of my own free will.
He wouldn't think of interfering with
ne, I hope. What ! I believe he's com
ing straight toward me!" !
Josephene turned the ieaves of her
book with an interest that grew every
moment more intense. But at length
decency required some recognition of the
nearing boat. The young man was row
ing now as if he had renewed interest in
life. He was soon at the base of the
rock.
"I beg your pardon," he said, as he
raised his hat; "can I be of any service
to you?"
"You are very kind, sir. You find me
in a very absurd condition."
"You have evidently been shipwrecked.
Are vou the sole survivor?"
4 'No, not shipwrecked, but' put ashore
and abandoned by my cruel tyrant of a
brother. To tell you the truth, sir, I am
the victim of a practical joke. My little
brother has left me here while he goes
farther up the lake to visit some friends
who are camping there."
"I beg you will make use of my boat,
then, to return. I will come up to you
in one moment."
Leaping out of his boat before Miss
Vail could say a word he drew it up on
a low shelf of the rock and quickly reached
her side.
"Let me help you," the young, man
said, with such a firm assurance of good
breeding that she made no resistance or
attempt at independence, but accepted
the proffered aid in a quiet, matter-oi
course way. , '
"Your boat! your boat, sir!" she sud
denly cried. It was too late. The rising
breeze drove the water with such force
ajrainst the rock so as to dislodge the
boat, and before Adams could grasp it,
it was gaviy tilting about, a half dozen
yards away.
The two looked at each other a mo
ment and then laughed, though both
were conscious of its being questionable
taste.
Adams sobered and said: 4 'Can you
ever forgive me. Miss "
"Miss Vail; I am Mis3 Vail."
"And I am Mr. Adams. Can you be
magnanimous enough to forgive me? "
"That is the Question I should ask
you."
"Ah, you evade mine. At any rateI
shall never forgive myself. A worse bit
of bungling I never saw. The truth is,
Miss Vail, I have had very little expert
ence in rescuing fair ladic3. You are the
first whose life I have tried to save. I am
no hero, as you see."
The genuine annoyance of her compan
ion roused the compassion of Josephine,
and she began to talk to him with a des
perate cheerfulness and acceptance of the
situation.
4 'What a cold-blooded little villain
that brother of yours must be, Miss Vail,
to desert you in this fashion. I suppose
we must throw ourselves on his mercy
when he comes back. How are you
going to account for me? Consider me
your man Friday."
Beneath their light talK ran an under
current of more or less bitter meditation
on the part of each. Miss Vail shuddered
to think what a good story this would
make to circulate among her friends,
while Adams foresaw how it would add
to the conviviality of the club. He began
with the fervent wish that he was out of
the scrape. He ended, I am glad to con
fess, by ceasing to envy liobinson Crusoe
his desert isle, and considering his own
far preferable. There was a breeziness
about this girl that made him forget the
mounting thermometer. She had a way
of .going to the point, and, moreover she
had a point, two things which Ben
Adams told his sister he appreciated in a
woman.
In short, by dint of making the best
of it, Miss Vail and Adams were both.
able to express honest suprise when a
boat appeared in the distance, and in
taking out his watch, Adams found it to
be 3 o'clock.
4 'Now!" was all ' Josephine said, but
there were conflicting emotions in the
monosyllable.
"Hullo-o!' shouted a shrill voice
across the water.
"nullo-o!" called Adams back.
Blank astonishment wiped all expres
sion out of Tom's face at first, but a
broad grin finally made its appearance.
" You re a great one, Jo," he muttered.
4 I'd like to know where you wouldn't
find a beau. Did he drop down out of
the clouds?"
"Hush, sir; you have'been a very
naughty boy."
As they rowed home Adams devoted
himself to cultivating the acquaintance
of the young scapegrace. The latter
proved very approachable, and Adams
found no difficulty in persuading him to
go fishing the next day.
When they were home at last, Jose
phine took her brother into her room and
turned the key.
"Tom, you've treated me very badly
to-day. What would you give if I would
not tell father? You wouldn' like to be
sent back to the military school, you
know."
"Say, sis, I'll tell you what," and the
little wretch gave a wink of immense sat
isfaction; ''if you won't tell on me, I
won t tell on you. Honor bright."
"Mrs. Adams," said Mr. Ben Adams to
his wife at their wedding reception a year
after. "Don't you think we might af
ford to tell people how we met; I never
knew a secret kept better. I nearly
ruined myself buying up that precious
brother-in-law of mine. You see, 1
thought on your account I wouldn't let
him tellr I didn t care; J liked it. I had
no business to, you say? But I liked it,
nevertheless. Here are Rutland and his
Mary. Let's tell them the story. They
know we're going to Lake Winnipafce for
our honeymoon." .
Saved by an Albatross.
The SidDey (Australia) Telegraph says:
A singular story has been related to us by
the master of the bark Gladstone, which
arrived there from London. While the
vessel was in latitude forty-two degrees
south and longitude ninety degrees east,
a seaman fell overboard from the star
board gangway. The bark was scudding
along with a rough sea and moderate
wind, but on the alarm of "man over
board " being given, she was rounded to
and the starboard life'boat was lowered,
manned by the chief officer and four
men. A search for the unfortunate man
was made, but owing to the roughness of
the sea he could not be discovered ; but
the boat steered to the spot where he was
last seen. Here they found him floating
but exhausted, clinging for dear life to
the legs and wings of a huge albatross.
The bird had swooped down on the man
while the latter was struggling with the
waves and attempted to peck him with
its powerful beak. Twice the bird at
tacked its prey unsuccessfully, being
beaten off by the desperate sailor battling
with two enemies the water and the al
batross both erreedy and insatiable.
For the third time the huge white form
of the bird hovered over the seaman, pre
paratory to a final swoop.. The bird, eager
for its meal, tanned its victim with its
wide-spread wings.
- Suddenly a thought occurred to him
that the huge form so close to his face
might become his involuntary rescuer.
Quick as thought he reached up and
seized the bird, which ho proceeded to
strangle with all his might. The huge
creature struggled with wings and pad
dles to free itself. In the- contest the
sailor was beaten black and blue and
cruelly lacerated, but he held his own,
and slowly the bird quivered and died.
The carcass floated lightly on the waves,
its feathers forming a comfortable sup
port for the exhausted man, who had so
narrowly escaped a lingering death. But
another danger awaited him. He was
not much of a swimmer, and the excite
ment of the extraordinary, conflict began
to tell upon him. He was faint and grew
giddy. But with one arm around the
albatross' body, under the wing, and one
hand clutching the bird's feet, the sailor
awaited his chance of rescue. Presently
he heard his comrades shout from the
boat, and in a few minutes more was safe
on Loard the bJrk. though a' good deal
shaken and exh.asted.
Our great thoughts, our great affec
tions, the truths of our life, never leave
us. Surely they cannot separate from
our consciousness, shall follow it wither
soever that shall go and are of their na
ture divine and immortal.
THE JOURNALISTIC JOKERS.
ZiAUGHABIiE STORIES FOUXD
: OUE EXCHANGES.
An Amateur Astronomer Shortening
a Sentence Cued to It The Iteat
Beaten The man at the Window
44 1 see by the Transcript that . the
comet has three tails," said the man on
the soap-box in the grocery store the
other night. . ' .
44 Well, I don't know to what comet
the paper specially referred," said an
other member of the congregation, " but
four or five nights ago I saw a comet
with nineteen tails. You may look sur
prised, gentlemen, but I saw it. There
might have been more taiU to it, but I
counted only nineteen. I saw it during
the late sleet while I was standing on my
head near my front stoop. I have had
no desire to make a second observation.
Middletown Transcript.
Shortening a Sentence
Eminent Statesman Yes, but I am out
of politics forever.
Worker Bill says you can easily get a
portion of the delegates.
"Yes, but I am out of politics.".
"Jim says he will turn iu his votes for
you."
"Yes, but I am out of "
4 'Mike estimates that you can get
btilf."
"Yes, but I am out "
4 'More than that."
4 4 Yes, but I am "
"Over half."
"Yes, but I " .
4 'Jake offers his votes."
"Yes, but "
"And I will give you mine. That
makes your nomination sure. Will you
accept?"
"Yes." Philadelphia Call.
Vsci to It.
At a hotel in a neighboring town re
cently there was quite a rumpus in a room
to which a card party had retired. Be
fore the disturbance ceased three men
wpr L-nnrlrprl sfnsrlpiq turn tn.blfa and ji 1 -
, . - .
mirror were oroiien, a aoor smasnea in,
and the fire deuartment called out, while
all the guests filled the hall and the ladies
screamed murder. After it was all over
a peaceful snore was heard issuing from
an adjoining room. Some of those pres
ent who had a curiosity to see who could
sleep through such a noise, pounded on
the door until they extracted a sleepy
"Hello!" and a night-capped head soon
appeared at the door, and. the voice at
tached inquired :
4 'What's wanted ?"
The situation was explained, and the
stranger replied :
"Been a row, eh ? Well, I don't mind
snch little affairs. I was brought up in a
college town and. boarded next door to a
theological seminary. Chicago Tribune.
The Beat Beaten
"You've got some nice wood over there
in your yard," said a seedy-looking tramp
to an Austin avenue lady.
4 4 Yes," said the ladv of the house.
4 'I would like to carry it in for you,"
said he. .
4 'My husband intends to carry it in,"
she replied. -
"Well," said the tramp, "I will carry
it in and pile it up nice if you will give
me my breakfast."
At this offer the lady consented, and
the tramp went to work.
After he had carried in a couple of
armfuls the lady stepped to the door and
found him sitting on the pile with hi3
claws on his knees and his face buried
in his hands.
4 'What is the matter ?" said she.
"Oh, lady," said he, looking up, "I
am so weak, for I have had nothing to
eat since day before yesterday," and he
again covered his face with his hands.
This seemed to rouse the lady's sympathy
and she went in and soon returned with
an excellent breakfast. After he had
swept everything from the board
he arose and said: 4 'Thanks, my
good lady, for thi3 sumptuous re
past. Now let me give you this
advice: Never again let your sympathy
get away with your discretion. I'm off.
Ta, ta!" and he walked majestically out
the front gate. The tramp had gone but
a short distance when he became deadly
sick. He seated himself on a curbstone,
and a few moments later, having two or
three violent spasmodic contractions of
the stomach, he lost his ill-gotten break-
last. Indeed his stomach would have
followed suit had it not been thoroughly
dovetailed to his diaphragm. He believed
that he was poisoned, and he became
very much alarmed. As soon as he
regained strength enough to get to his
feet he slowly retraced his steps and
found the lady standing in the front
doov.
"Madam," he said in piteous tones,
4 'my breakfast did not stay on my stom
! ach. I believe I'm poisoned."
'That is not to be wondered at," said
she. "I suspected your little game, hav
ing been caught once before in the same
way, so l prepared myself for it by dosing
your coffee with tartar emetic. Now let
me give you a little advice: Never again
let your rascality get away with your
breakfast. To beaf a dead-beat beats
everything. Ta, ta !" and she shut the
door in his face. The tramp started
sorrowfully down the street, wondering,
no doubt, where and how he could get a
breakfast that would stay with him.
Texas Siftings.
The Irian at the Window
You would have said a you looked
him over that he was a man of fiery tem
per, and that it would take over. two
" sas3 words" to make him peel off his
coat and sail in for victory or death, but
you would have been sadly mistaken. He
was writing away in his ledger Jwhen a
man came in, shoved his gas-bill into
the. window, and said i
44 Is this where they knock a man down
and rob him?"
The man at the window smiled. .
4 4 Because, it's no more nor less than
highway robbery to send me a . bill like
that! Twelve dollars for gas for Janu
ary, and the meanest kind of gas at
that!" b
The smile continued.
44 Why people will stand such outrag
eous treatment is a puzzle to me," con
tinued the man, as he flung his money in
after the bill. " I never burned six dol
lars worth of gas last month, and I'll
swear to it !" x.
The rebate was deducted, change
made, and the man at the window passed
it out with a thank you.
4 'Yes, -it's robberv!" muttered tha
other, "and I'll be hanged if I can't lick
any three gas-men in Detroit!"
He expected a reply, but none was
given. The smile faded out to some ex
tent, but perhaps that was because the
pen made a blot on the ledger.
. The next comer was a short, fat woman
with an eye full of brimstone, and you
could see that she was aching for a riot.
"Can I have ray pocket picked in
here?"
He smiled.
4 'And lobbed of the bread which my
fatherless children arc crying for?" s '
He nodded.
4 'And swindled out of money that I
have had to work for like a slave?"
"Yes'm."
"Oh! I thought so! nerc is my gas
bill. It is over six dollars!"
He nodded.
"Do you hear me over six dollars!"
He heard.
"And I didn't have but one burner
going, and that was shut off for four
straight nights r And I can bring twenty
witnesses to swear that the gas was so
poor that I couldn't read the accounts of
the flood in my newspaper!"
He brushed up his hair and glanced
out of the window.
" I'll never pay it! Every one of my
neighbors has advised me to stand a law
suit first!"
He drummed on the desk with his
nngcrs
"But I will pay it this onetime, as
my sister is sick and I don't want the
lawyers kicking in the doors and climb
ing through the windows."
He held out his hand.
"But another time I'll law you Til
law you from Halifax to Ilaverstraw be
fore I'll pay ! There's the money !"
He made change, whistling softly to
himself, and as she put the bill in her
pocket she snapped out :
44 Even a grave robber ought to have a
little conscience!"
But he didn't hear her. He was figur
ing at the ledger again. Detroit Free
Press.
Siam's Floating Capital.
In many points Bankok is more
Venetian than Venice itself, writes' a
traveler. In the queen of the Adriatic
despite those "bright streamlet veins"
about which modern poets make such a
stir one can walk through fully two
thirds of the town without being indebted "V
to the traditional gondola at all. In the()
Siamese Venice it is far otherwise. The
main street is the river, and there are nq'
side streets at all. 1 our opposite neigh . 0
bor lives upon the other bank, and bet 4jf
fore calling on him you have to call a
boat. The native children play in the
water as they would play on land else
where, and many of the houses, moored
to posts by short cables of rattan, rise
and fall with the tide like anchored ves
sels. Indeed, with the exception of one
long straggling road running parallel
with the river along its left bank, the
lilnd miorht inst n.a wrll nnt. h tVur ttt.
all. The approach to this singular place
is as picturesque as itself. Fur out at
sea you descry along the eastern horizon
a dim procession of purple shadows,
which, as you near them, resolve them
selves into bold rocky islets, with green
clumps of wooding scattered, broadcast
over the dark red sternness of their
gloomy cliffs and craggy ridge. One by
one they arc left behind, and now there v
begins to rise out of the
smooth sea, far ' awav in front of
us, something that looks at first '
sight like an endless line of soldiers in
battle array. These are the trees of the
Siamese coast. Soon the water all around
us turns thick and soup-like, wearing a
deep dye of yellowish brown, which an
nounces more plainly than words that we
are approaching the mouth of the 4 -beau- '
tiful, the pea-soup colored river " that
SI 1L. i - i ... .
jiows uy me lown oi AianKOK. All in a
moment the foul beer-colored stream and
the low mud -banks on cither side, and
the long, dark, leathery mangrove leaves,
which quiver like snakes' tongues in the
rank, white fever-mist that curls up
through them from the rotting deaths
below are transformed into a fairy land.
i ne oroad, smooth river, now bright with
the silver sheen of the moonlight, now;
fading into ghostly shadow, forms a back
ground worthy of DaAte. Here and there
amid the black masses of forests twinkles
a solitary point of fire, showing where
some Siamese fisherman has built his lit
tle nest of bamboo and dried grass amid
this strange wilderness, which is neither
land nor water, but a weird chaos of
both. But these lights, and the shadowy
boats that flit past like phantoms ever
aud anon, are the sole tokens of human
life in the depths of this grand and lonely
stillness, unbroken save by the hollow
rush of the swift, dark current speeding
onward to the sea. By day this nighty 1
jungle would be simply a foul and" un
wholesome swamp; but by night it is
transformed into a scene of enchantment
through the magic of that friendly dark
ness which, like charity or a lawyer's wig,'
covers a multitude of sins.
Out of 39,000,000 mechanics, 8,0
0 are paupers in 4England and on-
000
continent.
0