FUR SiH ID ES
SOMETHWG FOB EVEBTBODT
The annual «rear and tear on tbe
world's currency la estimated at two
tons o f sold and 100 tons o f stiver.
In all tbe civilized countries pf tbe
world 00 per cent o f tbe persons oyer
10 years old bare to work fo r a living.
There are in tbe State o f New York
forty-three villages o f between 1,0 0 0
and 2,000 inhabitants which have free
libraries.
C h l ( a a * 'a K « m i u .
Teaclitr Tommy, do you know what
latitude 1st
Tommy— Yes, ma'am.
It ’s distance
north and south et tbs Chicago river.—
Chicago Tribune.
la! clubman. "Y o u need a job. You're
suffering from o verrest” — N ew York
Sun.
w
Mrs. Be aha m— How much bid you
pay tbe minister when w e were mar
Tbe police justice looked at the bat-
tersd. disreputable specimen o f manhood ried? Benham— H e fined me fire dol
lars.— Harper’s Weekly.
before him and turned to tbs policeman.
“ Officer,“ he asked, “ what Is the com
Teacher— Now, children, what Is the
plaint?"
greatest enemy o f poultry?
Silence.
“ Rheumatia y’r honor,” spoke ap tbs Teacher— W bo eats tbe moet poultry?
prisoner, answering far himself.— € biceps
Pupils—T h e m in ister!— Jugend (M un
ich ).
T h e R ah.
Os tend— Pa. what do they mean when
thay m y “ Money is aaay”
la
W all
street?
Pa— They mean that It is easy, my
son, because they have Joat gotten it
from easy people.
Ostsnd— Then why can’t wa get It?
Pa— Because those that have a bold
on It are not easy.*
rm a
•
is
th
p . aa.
T a lk about your moving pictures that
they charge a dime to ate,
. .
W all, they may bs real amusing, but
Just take a' tip from m e:
Th ere’s a transparent curtain and two
“ apooners” on our street
T a lk about your moving pictures—w ell,
we guess wo *••▼* them b a st
“ K itty,“ said her mother, rebukii
'you must sit still when you ara at
can t, mamma, j
I'm a fidrotsrlan
Illra m Burrows— How'a yer chawin'
terbacker, Ezra?
Ears Skinner (reluctantly producing
p in g )— Failin ' fa st; I don't expect It
to last the day o u t— Puck.
T r iu m p h a t H a m a s N a tu ra .
‘T h em seventeen mothers In the vil
lage mothers’ club agreed to decide by
ballot which had the handsomest baby.’»
“ Wall, who woa i t r
“ Each kid got one vote.” — Judge.
P a rtic u la r « R « q a lr «4 .
“ Kitty, weoMa’t you Kky to kaaw
something about Esperanto?"
“ Do you ha vs to learn to play it, or la
It aomsthing you eut?”
T b e Lady— L ittle boy, don't you know
auto king w ill shorten your life? Th e
K id — Shucks!
W ot do I care? I ’ve
seen everyt’ lng dere l a — Boston Trav-
“ Before we were married,” said Mr*.
Chatterton, “ you used to tell me how
much you loved me, but you never do
now ." “ O f course not, my dear." re
plied the masculine partner. “ Since our
KASPAR ILLA
SOPHIA (
KITTLE5EN
■fi
A
m
mss r r a ifU it he a«*faatam la oars estsrrk.
s s k o L lass trouble«, rhsumstlns. serronmsm.
Josssss g " r
I k isser trosMss, sise erlöste
CONSULTATION IfflCE
w- - «----1- « M i t a i *# . I t .
. aei*B^B musine v i eisy
•'resists.
M it.
w ntw
Xseloss to m s m ».
tn m
h l.a h s
oiaRaa a aa
The C. Gee Wo Medicine Co.
1I2H Heat St.. Near Marrtaea
PM U
MO. SO-OS
I n / B X K w ritin g to t d r o r i IM M T I M M
J T f m e n ilo « th is p « * « r .
la
“ L it t le
I t a ly . “
H e C m M
ed variety,
Tbe trees bore a few
almonds last year and many more this
year, and by another year Mr. Cox
lowing form ula ia e ffe c tiv e : " T o one thinks he w ill get a crop large enough
h a lf pin t o f good whiskey add one ♦o m a rk et— Houston Pqat
ounce o f Toria Compound and one ounce
The death o f James W . Paul, the
ty. Young W ife— Yes, but I have age«! Syrup Sarsaparilla Compound.
Take riilladelphln hanker, recalls this story
rapidly since our marriage.
in tablespoonful doses before each meal which he told at a Philadelphia dub
“ My
friends,” «aid an
Itinerant and before re tirin g .”
not long ago: “ I was going home one
Toria compound ia a product o f the
preacher, “ the Scriptural rule for glv
laboratories o f the Globe Pharmaceuti
cal Co., Chicago, but it aa w ell as the
other ingredients can bs had from any
i*I>eu a door with n latchkey. A fter
good druggist.
cording to your means. W e w ill dis
looking at him a few minutes I decided
pense with the next hymn and tnke up
to help the man. who was not so far
lll« a t r a t l« s It.
the collection.’’— LIpplncott'a
“ Joaiah,” aaked Mra. Chugwater, look cone aa to have forgotten his polite
W illie — And no you quarreled? Char ing up from eba newspaper ahe waa read ness, fo r before entering the house
through the door which I succeed
lie— Y e a ; she aent back all my pres ing. “ what ia a ‘homeatretch’ ?”
"This,” answered Mr. CRugwater, lean- ed In opening he naked my name
ents.
And what do you suppose I
ng back In hia eaay chair, slowly extend-
and thanked me. I proceeded on my
did? W illie— Can't guess. Charlie— I
ag his arms at right angles with hia
aent ber a h a lf dozen boxes o f fa ct Hedy, and accompanying the exercise with
powder, with a note explaining that < dismal yawn. “ You've seen me do it a
I ’d taken about that much home on
•
"ro *s ."— Chicaro Tribune
my coat since I ’ d known her.— Th e Ooa-
ward me w ith unnteady gait. When be
■lp.
,
reached me he put one hand affection
W hat has become o f the old-fashioned
ately on my shoulder, and, looking me
woman who had her photograph taken
In the face, eald: 'Say, did you ever
with one hand holding a half-opened
get an answer to that long letter you
book?
wrota to tba Theaaalonlana?' "
I
T e ll a
L ie .
F or Infanta and Children.
Engaanmaa
ALCOHOL 1 PER CENT
I n f a n t s .-T h ildkin
I am sorry you can’t be nay bride, May,
Mrs. Bertha Ayrton has succeeded in
But my father won’t give his consent, ascertaining tbe cause o f tbe refractory
And if he, la n rage, cot me off. May,
behavior o f tbe searchlight in certain
. Why I never could p«y for m K rent
respects and in devising a remedy. The
British adm iralty called on Prof. A y r
But why should we live any more? May.
ton
to investigate tbe trouble some time
In death we should mot be apart
ago. A fte r making many Investigations
I suffer alone, and am seised. May,
With a grief that is nearing my heart. be turned tbe problem over to his w ife,
wbo is the only woman member o f the
So let's fine from tbe odious world. May, Institute o f Electrical Engineers and
Where there’s nothing but troubles and who received the only medal ever
cures,
nward«M to a woman by the Royal So
Ah, won't it be grand, when we two, hand
ciety
o f London fo r original unaided
in hand.
work.
Are climbing tbe golden stairs?
T h e Congregational parsonage at l o t
tery is one of- tbe oldest bouses In th«*
State o f Maine. It la tbe oldest ecclesi
astical residence in the State, and tbe
T o A v o id M is ta k e s .
oldest one in present use In New Eng
“ I want a bottle of Rybold’s Extract,” land. The house was built In 1729, in
said the prominent politician of
the tbe days o f Hon. W illiam Pep per el I,
’ Steenth ward, stepping into a drug store. fa th e r-o f 8 lr W illiam Pepperell.
It
“ Rybold’s ExtractT’ queried tbe drug
contains tbe library bequeathed by Sir
gist. “ That's a medicine I never beard
W illiam to Dr. Benjamin Stevens, for
o f before.”
“ I never beard of it, either, until to-day, forty years minister o f the K lttery
but I ’m under contract to write a testi Point church. Dr. Stevens In his turn
monial for it, and I want to find out what bequeathed the library to tbe Congrega
diseases K claims to be good for.”
tional ministers o f K lttery and York
for all time. Many o f these books con
V m C m GstAMeWe r«st-C«se m c i.
Anxious M other— Nellie, dear, do yon
Write Allen ft. Olmsted. Le Roy, N. Y „ for s tain the Pepperell coat-of-arms.-^Ken
Iree sample ot Allen'srbot-Ksse. It cures nebec (M e .) Journal.
think that young Huggins, who has sweating,
hot swollen, sching feet. It makes
bean calling on you twice a week for new or light shoes easy. A certain euro for
In Henderson County, Calti Cox, flv.
eorns.
Ingrowing
and bunions. All drug
some time, Is m atrim onially Inclined? gists sail I t 36c. naiU
Don’t accept anr substitute
miles from Athens, has not only ad
Pretty Daughter— Really, I don’t know
hered to tllversiflcatloh In all Its forms,
what to think, mamma, dear. He has
raising fruit* tomatoes and the cereal
such a knack o f keeping one In the
and hay crops, as well as some cotton,
dark I
but he has been Investing some money
Old Acquaintance— Why. old chap, a
In other experiments, some o f which
few years ago you were
the beat
are about to turn out very profitably.
dresaed mnn in town, but now your
One o f his side experiments has been
outfit la pretty shabby. Had a reverse ?
almonds, he having put In quite a num
Companion— W ell, you may call It th a t
ber o f the young trees about five years
Tba truth is. 1 got married since, and
ago. T h e trees are now well grown
now It's my w ife that’s the beat dressed
and are bearing fine almonds, though
woman in town.
not as large nor as fine as the Import-
i
“ W ell, good-by, d * a r !" said Mr. Trne-
boy to bla beloved spouse. “ I must go
and dictate those letters— twenty-six o f
them— so you mustn’t expect me borne
very ea rly."
“ A ll rig h t!",w a s tbe response. “ But
I wish you wouldn't work an bard.”
H a lf an hour later, Mr. Troeboy en
tered bis club and sat down, with three
others, at a card table.
“ Just a moment, you fellows, before
tbe first band Is dealt. I ’ ve got to keep
my word with my wife. One o f you
just take down what I d icta te: ‘A b e
d e f g b l j k l m n o p q r s t u v w
a y s . ’ T h ere ! Those letters are off
my mind."
Mrs. Pneubride (a t telephone)— H ello!
la that the health department?
H e C « « M Wot T e l l • L I « .
‘ Voice— Yea
Inquiring laidy— llo w much milk
Mra. Pneubride— I wish you would send does yonr row give a day?
one o f your officers to 697 Bilgus street.
Truthful Boy— 'Bout twelve quarts,
This house is full of cockroaches.— Chi
lady.
cago Tribune.
Inquiring I jm I jt — A nd bow much o f
that do you sell?
Stranger (aa horseback)— Uncle, what
Truthful Boy— 'Bout tw elve quarts^
is tba price « f oats te-day?
lady.— Unman Life.
Uncle Jed (sitting on the feace)— We
Th« H «n c «n .
don’t sell our votes In these diggin’s, mis
A veterinary surgeon pronounced •
ter. Bs you a candidate?
hunter to be afflicted with an incur
able dlaeaae.
"You called os Miss Tartun and she
"W h at had I better do?” queried tbe
greeted you with: ‘Why, Mr 8oireltop!*
owner
to his groom.
Well, what was there in that harmless
“ W ell, air," was tbe reply, "con-
exclamation to offend you, Percy?”
“ Yes, but she— er—-didn’t punctuate it srientlously «|waking, I should part
that way. She said: ‘ Why Mr. SorreJ- with him to another gentleman.'*—T it-
Signatare
O T N a r c o t ic .
N E W YORK.
A l b m o n th s o ld
j j D o s r s - J j O M s
Copy o f Wrapper.
nr
€
:AKIND PDWDi’-
(RESCENT
.MUDO AU
TRAT AfIT
high rara)
roan a a v i
DO Alt)
D om arn e
E g g -P h o s p h a te
BAKING POWDER
A
F U L L P O U N D 25c.
Highest
Young W ife —To-m orrow w ill be my
birthday, dear.
Young
Husband—
You’ll be twenty-one? Young W ife —
N o ; twenty-five.
Young Husband—
C Gee Wo
«*
Tbe Finns evidently have hot found
A school teacher In tbe Italian quar
woman suffrage a failure.
Nineteen ter o f an American city told ber chil
women were elected to their first P a r dren tbe story o f tbe fox and the
liament.
Now twenty-five have Just gnspes. Tony was especially delighted
been elected to tbe second.
with tbe story, and eagerly sought his
Berlin opened a rink on Sept. 1 for chum, Joe, wbo was in another class.
ice skating all tbe year round. Th is By good luck, tba teacher overbeard
make« tbe fourth pvrmanent ice rink Tony's version.
In bis excited, broken English be
in Europe, others being operated in
told the fable much as It was written,
London, Paris and Munich.
Th e Ivory nut, notch Is so much until be came to tbe end. This was bla
rendering o f tbe d lm a x :
need by button manufacturers. Is tbe
“ De olda fox be say, ‘Da grape mi
fru it o f a species o f palm which grows
good, anyhow; alia sour. I guess I
in Central and South America.
It
go gets de banan.’ ”
form « a valuable crop, particularly in
Panama, Colombia, Ecuador and Pent.
H ew f e e tow It .
A German statistician baa calculated
that
tbe steam power In present use on
HEALTH VERY PO O R —
this globe Is equal to 120,000,000 horse
RESTORED BY PE-RU-NA power. T b e coal needed to supply this
fo r a year would make a freight
Catarrh Twenty-five Years— % steam
train extending ten times around tbe
Had a Bad Cougtf eartb.
Mias Sophia K ittieaon, Evanston,
From Mora comes a story o f sugar
111., w rite s :
“ I have been troubled w ith catarrh beets more than tw o feet long and
fo r nearly tw enty-five years and have weighing only a trifle less than twelve
tried many cures fo r it, but obtained pounds. There are said to be tw o o f
these monster tubers there, and It is
very lit t le help.
“ Then my brother advised me to try claimed they were grown on tbe farm
Peruna, and I did.
o f a native who lives several miles up
“ M y health was v e r y poor a t the tbe valley from tbe town o f Mora.— Las
tim e I began takin g Peruna.
M y Vega« (N . M .) Optic.
throat was very sore and I had a bad
wlthout gloves?
Bella— Yea, and It
The first recorded production o f a
cough.
,
would have been better for poor, dear
play In Australia took place in June
George If he had done it witbout shoes.
o f tbe year 1780. I t was called “T b e
Bacrultlug Officer." Th e proceeds o f tbe
"T h e telephone Is certainly a great In
I recommend Peruna to
all my first pay night (some £20) went to the
fam ily o f a man wbo had been drown
vention. Think o f It I You can talk to friends who are troubled as I w a s ."
In January, 1796, a rough and
your w ife fifty miles aw ay."
‘T h a t
PERUNA TABLETS:—Some people pre ed.
may be your exiierience. A ll I ’ve been fe r tablets, rather than medicine in s ready playhouse was opened and tbe
fluid form . Such people can obtain Per public had to pay one shilling a bead
able to do la to listen.”
Tbe payments were
represent the fo r admission.
“ Have you,” naked the judge o f a re runs tablets, which
made
In
kind,
wheat,
flour or rum tak
medicinal
ingredients
o
f
Peruna.
Each
cently convicted man, “ anything to o f
fe r tbe court before sentence is tablet equals one average dose o f P e ing the place o f the usual currency.—
runa.
London Standard.
passed?”
“ No, your honor,” replied
Don't mark your stationery any
the prisoner, “ my law yer took my last
Man-a-fin the Ideal Laxative
longer
with a monogram. That is out
dollar."
Ask V o w Druggist fa r a fr e e Panma
o f date.
Tbe latest symbol Is tbe
“ I saw tbe m ajor's w ife at her win Almanac far 1909.
thninb
mark.
It is engraved in gold or
dow early this morning. She looked
T h « I t Petersburg correspondent et Silver and has all tbe value o f a Ber-
dO years o ld !" "Y ou must be mistaken,
your hlglineaa; no woman is as old as th« London Mail mys that ear druass tlllon mark o f Identification. Station
she looks In the m orning!” — FI legends made of thin leaves of silver are being ers wbo have Introduced this w ay o f
used in the Russian military hospitals for marking use tbe prints in the center o f
Blaetter.
diseases of tbs M r, to repines defective a correspondence card and about half
“ W hy are you so vexed. Irm sY " I
an inch from the top to make them
am ao exasperated!
1 attended the
most effective. Th e thumb is some
meeting o f the Social Equality League,
times printed in red or blue, although
and my parlor maid presided and had
the metal colors are more popular.—
the audacity to call me to order three
New York Son.
Thars are now ever 280,000 words in
Mulligan— T b e byes any ye licked
the English language acknowledged by the
best authorities, or about 70.000 mors poor Casey. Share, he niver hurt luy
than In th« Gorman, French, Spanish and man's
feelln’s.
Harrigan— He’a a
Italian Isnrnacos combined.
shnake in tbe grass. Th e blackguard
referred to me as bis conttinperary,
and I ’ ll be tbe contlmperary to no man
livin'.— Puck.
This sterling household remedy is moat
successfully prescribed for a “ world of
troubles." For derangements o f the di
gestive oegans it is a natural corrective,
operating directly apon the liver and ali
mentary canal, gently but persistently
stimulating r a healthful
Its
lealthful activity.
beneficial influence
influence extends, however, to
every portion o f the system, aiding in the
■Processes o f digestion and assimilation of
food, promoting a wholesome, natural
appetite, correcting sour stomach, bad
breath, irregularities o f tbe bowels, con
stipation and the long list o f troubles
directly traceable to those unwholesome
conditions.
Kasparilla dispels drowsi
ness, headache, backache and despond
ency doe to inactivity o f the liver,
kidneys and digestive tract. I t ia a
strengthening tonic o f the highest vaine.
M IJ J .
MA PI E1N
^pn
A Flavoring. It makes a
B i syrup better than Maple.
Em J*
>
SoU by grocers.
Q uality
I
More Converts
Every Year
^
r
E very day in every year that comes, more house* I
w ives are giving up their exorbitant priced Baking 1
Pow ders and turning to K C, the honest and reliable,
which has stood so w ell the test of years. They are
finding out that
BAKING
POWDER
costs one third the price o f powder any
w here near K C quality, and makes
better, purer, more healthful baking.
2A Ounces for 2d Cents
Perfect
R esu lts