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to Hie Siumdis aruiBoatb j
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I fpiuiu .Morphine norMutral.
ISotNahcotic.
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lion . Sour Siomnch.Diarrliuci
Worms .ToiTVTilsiouvrwnsIr
ness and LOSS OF SLEEP.
FacSmsk SiCnamriof
NEW YORK.
Tor Ir.funfg aid Children.
Tha Kind Ycii Have
Always Bought
Bears the
Signature
of
M . I IU
ft W
A
II
In
1)36
For Over
Thirty Years
1
uaranlecd under theY
Exact Copy of Wrapper.
BO
l-p o ri una m. n h h h m ptsi
if b yjjy U W sat MM M
vmb eeamuta eoaeaav. mtw ton am.
1 'I, ,iJmmjrr V iXi Yr'T f'T T3
Loaarevtt r.
"My Statu." said tlia Virginian, "Is tha
mother of Presidents."
"Yea," aula tha Ohio man. "but tha
eld lady baa outllrad her toys bait a
cautery ar mora."
Profeaaloaal AdTlea,
. rhyslelan You'll have to b cnreful
tlila summer and uot overexert .our-
self.
Patient Then you think I ought to
Uke a vacation, eliT
Physician Certainly not Didn't I
just tell you not to overexert yourself?
Tha Cob ve-raalloa of Cola.
"Money talks," said the succinct per
son. "Yea," answered MIm Cayenne, "and
soma of It seems at present to be quite
w"lly and scandalous In IU remarks."
Washington Star.
A groat Irrigation project involving an
-yxpenditur of about $.'.",((K),0(K) baa been
authorized by the Svcretary of Stat (or
ludis.
vtor.t Ihlnsr Abnat Than,
"Appearance," remarked Mra. High
Jina, "ara ao deceitful."
'I don't mind Hint ao much," alhed
Mra. Aiuofh, "but they re so axpcoaira
to keep upl"
During the lifetime of a healthy hen
aha will lay from 3iK to !M)0 eggs. Her
tet laying capacity It during her aecoud
year.
Sixteen out of tha twenty-one Engllxh
oronationa that took place between Wil
liam II. and Klitnbcth, both Inclusive,
were held on a Sunday.
Km Better.
Nan O, that atory looks too long. I
don't want to read It.
Fan Yea, you do. It's a story about
woman you don't like.
Japan has very few millionaires and
practically no multi-millionaires.
Tract at tha Tedd? Bear.
When It sits up on Its haunches, In
poae for catching flies ;
When it oglpa you, my children, with Its
wicked little eyes;
When it reaches out caressingly, Its fore
paws In the air
That la tha time of peril, dear! Ne
truce with the Teddy Bear I
Peculiar Itladao Drama.
Drums used In Hindoo religious pro
cessions are called dolea. They are
made of baked earth, and sometimes
raLASD's bock dwellers.
,a,. Pla Aael.at lllahwar
- ......led hr aa OU -
Tlit re are i-rhaa many i.lle here
uh il.m t know that Knelnn.1 uas in
. ...... du ller. 8.1VS the I'hiludelphl
rrheleiw, and
th.r are the moat ancient li.mia-a I
Kucland t.-day. The-e dellluirs are
k-in.ue m-hli-h. hv the way. Is from
rii. ..Id Knirllxu words. Keum Vaur,
which slcnltl.. a s-reat ride. The rlde
referred to overlooka the valley of
Stour and rises to me ueiKoi ...
fet The ro-k Is or sni.tiou m
along It the r. k dwelling have been
hn out. The only ro k nou
present Inhabited are situated In the
h.,. tu.lnred bouhler at the end of
Klnver Edge, known as Holy Austin
rock
Tiie whole of this vast natural rort
.. t 1 -lfK mt')r
reaa la nteraiiy nonejTOU" - -
dwelllncs. which have been construct
.1 thrmt dlfTen'Ilt
altitudes. The
method of construction has been to hew
out the rooms aud cut small apertures
In the rock face for windows. In wnicD
the modern dwellers have Inserted
elnss. The chimneys are panicuiuny
curious structures, being- forme.! of a
groove cut In the face of the rock, sup
planted with brickwork,
v..ni.r n-L- h.i! !-.con so !"ns nin-
liubltol that all traces or ine oiiHaora
have dlnpeared.
This cave Is knowu liK-ally as Meg a
ox hole and It Is credited with hav
Ins been In the early part of the lawt
century the stronghold and hiding luce
f a notorious bund of highwaymen,
The ol.let Inhabitant of Holy Austin
rock I the venerable Mrs. Chase, who
Iwells In one of the houses on the
tlrst floor, as It might be termed, aim
dispenses tea and light refreshments
to visitors. I'pon the third or top
story Is to be seen the most curious
stable In Kngliwid, perched hUh up In
the rock, the only approach being by
a narrw pathway running round the
face of the rock Itself. The animal who
occupies this unique stable Is quite a
local celebrity, as he makes a weekly
lourney Into Stourbridge to bring out
supplies to the rock dwellers. This
part of the rock Is, honeycombed
through from side to sidr.
MaJ. John W. l'owell, whose right
srtn una shot oft durlnir the Civil War.
a yard long, and twice as large at thetuni,erto,(k nml brouBht to a successful
center as ai e.u.r r..u. au. ururas lssUH one f tUe ,11(st (iarU) feHt8 of
are tnin copier Dnaiua or duwis, cov
ered with parchment or calfskin,
which is held In place by an Iron hoop.
Headquarters for Information.
Dicky You don't b'lleva that story
about Little Red Itiding Hood an' (ha
wolf, do youT
Kitty Course I do.
Dicky Well, if you'll list write te
Pres'dent Roosevelt so' ask Mm about It
he'll tell you It'a a fake.
No Feara.
Manufacturer (showing him around the
workahopa) With our Improved machin
ery wa can make one of tbeaa giant fira
crackera every minute In tha day.
Vialtor Aren't you afraid you will
overstock the market T
Manufacturer Not at all. There's
fool born everv minute.
Her Falllna-.
"What a chronic blunderer Mrs. nit
termini isl She bad several engaged
couples at her hoiiHS for dinner the other
evening, and she didn't do a thing but
pair them all off wrongly."
"Yes ; she doesn't seem to know how to
put two and two together."
A perfect head, viewed from the side,
falls within a perfect square, averaging
nine Inches for a man, and eight and a
half for a woman.
J3Y IMPURITIES IN TIIE DLOOO
Whenever a sore refuses to teal it h because the blood Is not pure and
nealthy, as it should be, but is infected with poisonous perms or some old
blood taint which has corrupted and polluted the circulation. Those most
usually afflicted with eld sores arc persons who have reached or passed mid
dle life. The vitality ct the blood and strength of the system, have naturally
begun to decline, and the poisonous perms hich have accumulated because
vi u Mssi:.a nnu inactive condition ot the system, or some hereditary taint
which has hitherto been held ia checli, now force nn outlet on the face, arms,
legs or other part of the body. The place prows red and nnry, festers and
fats into the surrounilin-r tissue until it become a rhrnnir. anA tMr
ulcer, fed and Lcpt open by the impurities with which the tlood is saturated.
jNoth-nj is more trying and disagreeable than a stubborn, non-hcalinj sore.
The very fact that it resists ordinary remedies and treatments i3 pood reason
lor suspicion; the same perm-producing cancerous ulcers is back of every
old sore, and especially is this true if the trouble b an inherited one.
Washes, salves, nor indeed anything else, applied directly to the sore, can.
1 IwasafMeaMwUhaaoreontny ?oan? Prnancr.tgoo.l ; neither will remov
face of four yoars standing, it ing the sore with caustic plasters or tha
rA::i?;T.rAV.n,iiUoU: M,S. Y" a lasting cure. If
in every war natit i bwinnii every particle of the diseased flesh, were
S&iVnE1 at - war another sore would come, be-
traated me but the. enra continued, cause the trouble is in the blood, find the
Xl?u0JroLZU SI000 CANNOT BE CUT AWAY.
and after talna- It a whtla I was The cure must come by a thorough cleans-
cotnpletely cured. My blood la Jnir f th. bliwt T O Q o ii t . t
now pure and bealthy from tha In 01 lne t1100!- I" h. S. S. Will be found
rieot of a. s. a., and thr haa not a remedy forsores and ulcers cf every kind
9r.B.lKu' h ,or ,in' " '"a unequalled blood purilier-one that
Kocs oirecny into tiie circulation and
promptly cleanses it cf all poisons and
taints. It pets down to the very bottom cf
the trouble and forces out every trace cf im
purity and mates a complete and l.istin(f
cure. S. S. S. changes the quality of th
blood so that instead of feeili niT tlt a-Kotaaahsl
'. PURELY VEGETABLE fartS ith impurities, it nourishes the
irritated, inflamed flesh with healthy blood.
Then the sore begins to heal, new flesh is formed, all pain and inflammation
leaves, the place scabs over, and when S. S. S. has purified the blood tha
sore ia permanently cured. S. 8. S. is for sale at all first class drug stores.
Write for our special book on sores and ulcers and any other medical advice
ou desire. Ve make no charge for the book or advice.
THCSWIFT SPECIFIC CO.. ATLANTA. C4a
modern times. While making his ex
plorations of the canons of the Colora
do River In 18tl!), says the author of
"The Musters of Fate," he was called
upon to face great dangers and tolls.
Ills own account of his explorations
gives some Idea of the difficulties en
countered. I hare a barometer on my back,
which rather Impedes my climbing. The
walls of the Assure are of smooth lime
stone, offering neither foot- nor band
hold, so I supiort myself by pressing
my back against one wall and my
knees sgnlnst the other, and In this
way lift my body. In a ah Hilling man
ner, a few feet ut a time, unt.l I have,
perhaps, made twenty-five feet of the
ilist.inco, when the crevice widens a
little, and I cannot press my knees
against the rocks In front with suffi
cient power to give uie support In lift
ing my body, and I try to go back.
This I cannot do without falling. So
I struggle along sldewlse, farther Into
the crevice, where It narrows.
I llnd I can get up no farther, and
cannot get bnck, for I dare not let go
with my hand, and cannot reach foot
hold below. I call to Itradley for help ;
lie cannot reach me. Then he looks
round for some stick or limb of a tree,
but Buds none. The moment Is criti
cal. Standing oil my toes, my muscles
liegln to tremble. If I lose my hold I
shall fall to the Nittoin, and then kt-
linps roll over the liench and tumble
atlll further down the cliff.
At this Instant It occurs to Bradley
to take off his trousers, which he does,
and swings them down to me. I hug
close to the rock, let go with my hand,
seise the dangling legs, and with his
assistance I am enabled to get to the
top.
Tnna ntarvw
Wast Union, Ohio.
W. L. DOUGLAS
$3.00 & $3.50 SHOES tS.Vod
ai'MOtt FOR IVFRT MEMBFR Of
"w TMf fMILV. r ALL PHICtS.
aaTJUU( b.o,.. afoca or maa at a.Vf
f7nu1f.f )"" Atawt'e tS 93. HO mtom
nbiVairU WiaM awy )wr SMMtfiefme,
Til ft R C A 0! W. U Uonglaa aho ara worn bv mnrm per
la all of Ufa than anf othae anaae, la het-aiua of tt,.ir
eie.UtU style, Suing, and suirttr wearing oualltiea.
1'lie Me-tton iff the leathers ami ether ai.lenala for e.-a part
rf th. .Iioa, and averr detail nf tha waking IsIoi'IimI after fr
the aeiapiarf aals.unnaf.aperlateadeato, foremen and
hilit thoemak.ra, h. rwelT the hlgheat way paid la the
ali,e IndintrT, and alioaa wurkmanahi eaaaot ha eirelled.
If I mull tk voa Into at lr. fatnrfM at Srnrkton.Maas,
and ih.. roa ho rarefullv W U Iwxiiliw ,ho are anxte, ya
amald then aadarasand war they hold their shapa, tt hatter.
1 ? "af sea aeSI 0.M 0aeaf mmmmt h aawa7f m
v . la. I NtttfiitM hdMtn his ntiu ami prif on lh tlt4m o .rH. t ,,u hl-
tnfrvr sKak Tak Xm ftitbt.t. y h bmm .Itr ,mmUrw fyrThr
V
afaM taiisr Jraaa
I ssiajiniaj. vaaM mmlrtfrm rT.L,M(l
har.
L. a, Bn.klM, at a
Itarlnajr Vaikn Knslnrer..
The oiMratlons of Yankee engineers
are a source of constant wonder and
bewilderment to all foreigner The
daring way in which tha Americans
blow up mountains that come in their
way, or string bridges ovtr seemingly
impassable canyons nlmoxt takes their
breath away. On one Job In South
America a contractor used about
$mi,(mio worth of iowder in blasting.
He employed S.uxJ men and completed
a piece of work In les than three
months that local authorities said could
not tie done Inside of ten years. He
put 3. kegs of powder in one blast,
and when the shot went off it sent over
Tmi trnlnlonds of ris k down a cliff Into
the river. There was such a muss of
debris thnt It raised the water of the
ttrenm SS feet lu less than twenty min
utes. The channel had to he blasted
out to let the water through. The force
of this Immense charge was so great
thnt It sent huge boulders the she of
1'X cars sailing over the hill like a
rt'k of buzzards flying over a barn.
-Toledo Illade.
Ilaadleapped.
"Too bad alxmt Keene. There's a
fund of g,sl humorous stuff In tlie
snti.-s of the wntild-l society people
In his pew neighborhood."
"Well, he's Just tlie fellow to take
advantage of that for bis funny
sktche,"
"Yes, but his wife fs trying to get
Into society there." Catholic Standard
and Tlmea.
A-rieatr.
Spsin't king, when tha new little babe
wakes him up
At midnight all ml.ty and dim
Should tell hira he ll do to him ifhe ain't
gvd
What the Cnlted States did to him
Hon.too Post.
The tramp eats to lire; B fact, that
! about all he It willln. to do for the
privilege.
She (looking aw, ff)-H" a?
th borlson Is! HeLyei; Just swept
It witn my eye. p Transcript.
"Promise me that vou U iwr marry
again when I'm deaiL" "0' that' w
soul, you may u perf-tr ,ure'"
IV urge r.
"Say. Dick, what i. the arw fad they
call phonetic spelling y "If klncL
Jim, tney used to von aa 1
school for using. "naitlnore American.
"What did old n,,,. air when you
told him you would lit tin t0 fln(1
you an opening in ni, 0ffly' ",,e
showed .me the door." Baltimore
American,
Patient When yuu'r 111, doctor, do
you treat yourself ? "So, I call In one
of my colleagu, ,- rarD can't I call
ia oue or them the oo that cureu
your" Kurger.
Tomniypa .iV. . . ijthmus ct
Panama? Pa -The l.thuius of Pan
ama, Tommy, la u narrow atrip of land
connecting Ceutrul Amrrlra and the
Lnited States Treiisury.-Kam'S Horn,
Mrs. Hlghbrldge-Do JU ""J 11
more economical to do vour own cook-
ug7 Mrs. HurnhRiii Much more,
find my husband does not eat half so
much as when we h,i ( cook. Scraps.
Tlmklns I hute that Mlow Plant
em. He Is always talking "hop. Slmp-
klns riantem. the undfrtakerT Tlmp-
Klna Yes. Every time I meet blm he
asks after my bealtb.-Detrolt Trib-
uue.
"John's done right well up In the
city, after all." "Uo telL" "Yes; I've
Jes' beam that he's reentered from one
appendicitis, two ortennoblles, one
heart failure an' three business ones."
Atlanta Constitution.
"How much postage will this re
quire?" asked the young author. "It
one of my manuscripts." "Two
cents on oum-e," answered the lst
offlee clerk. "That's first-class mat
ter." "Oh. thank vmt !"-Judce.
Laundryman I regret to tell you,
lr, thut one of your shirts is lost. Cus
tomer But, here, I hav Just paid yoj
2 cents for doing It up. Laundryman
Quite right, sir; we laundered It be
fore we lost it Harpers Weekly.
"Things are not as they used to be,"
aid the man of melancholy reminis
cences. "No, answered Mr. Dustln
Stag regretfully. "The times was when
great wealth would get a man out of
trouble. Now it gets hlin Into It
Washington Star.
"This Is a queer world," sighed Mr.
Splurglt. "Whllt I was wondering
where I was golui to get the money to
pay the, rent this Bonth, I hapissned In
the kitchen and hard the washerwom
an say she'd Just ptli down $1,0(10 on
a new bouse." Detr Ifre Press.
Ihjctor What? Troiiid with slo.-p-lessness?
Eat sonifthlni before going
to bed. Patient Why, doew, you once
told me never to eat anything before
going to bed. (With dignity ) Pooh,
pooh ! That was Inst January. Science
has made enormous strides since then.
Ex.
"You'd make a pretty pod clerk,"
said the employer, sarcastically, "If
you only had a little mors common
sense." "Indeed!" replied the clerk.
"But did it ever occur to you that If I
had a little more common sense I
wouldn't be a clerk at til?" London
Tit-Bits.
Housekeeper I hear four brother,
who died In California, left you fl.OtiO,
Dinah. That will be i great help to
you. Washlady Deed; It will, missis!
Ah's been needlu' a pltuner an a pho-
nograft an' a oil paints ob mahsalf in
a gilt frame fo' yeabt,m' now, bre
de good Lord, Ah kin bib n : puck.
Lawyer (examining witness) Do
you know the man who formerly owned
this gun? Witness T sir. Lawyer
Is he In the courtroom? Witness
No, sir. Lawyer Wbfi Is he? Wit
ness I don't know. Lawyer When
and where did you s blm last? Wit
nessSix months ago-t bis funeraL
Chicago News.
"Well," aald he, aniiooa to patch in
their quarrel of yesterday, "aren't you
curious to know wbnt'i In thl pn
age?" "Not very." replied the still
belligerent wife. Indifferently. "WelL
It's something for the one I love best
In all the world." "Ab! I suppose It's
those susfienders you said you needed."
The Catholic Standard and Times.
The big touring car bail Just whlwed
by with s roar like a gigantic rocket,
and Tat and Mike turned to watch It
disappear In a cloud of dust "Thlm
chug wagons must pott s hape av
cash." said Mike. "Tbe rich Is fairly
burnln' money." "An b the smell at
It," sniffed Pat, "It must be thot taint
ed money we do be hearin' so much
aboot" Success Magatlae.
They Didn't Tsltf.
"That society newspal"''' published
some very flattering remarks about
me," began Mia. I
"Yea." replied her best friend; "but
It was horrid of the editor to go and
poll It the way he ,ild."
"Spoil It Indeed: Why. h M,, '
was a beautiful belle of the younger
set and "
"Yes, and then he put your photo-
grapn right nmh-r It"
X-aast A. mm4 Maw.
Miss Gaddle Enemies. T1
Why, I thought she loTed you not long
ago?
Miss Bright So .t did. and she
kvea me not now. Philadelphia Press.
If a man knows that other people are
not any bigger f(0s tnna be Is be
knows all about hiunsn nature that Is
worth knowing.
There Is something the matter with a
woman when she it willing to Vet a man
ao an the talking.
Our Idea of a charming woman It
VATimZ STORIES BT 8ATX0E3.
Isaks that Klllr-4 a M.sktr as
lived 1st Vlrtlsa'a Shall.
President Itoost'velt s attacks upon
the authenticity of other person's na
ture stories and the men who tell them
may lead to International complications
if continued, for to-day several new
brands of anecdotes of animals came to
town, and tbe sutbors are ready to
stsnd up for their rights snd their ver
acity.
On board the British freight steam
ship Indrapura, la port from Japan and
India, Is Chow, a chow dog. Chow
ould rather fight than eat, and he
demonstrated his predominating desire
on severs occasions during tbe 30,000
nille Journey that tbe Indrapura. under
Captain Kelway's command, ended
opon ber arrival In New York. Be
sides Chow, tbe Indrapura boasts of
Tyser, a wire-haired Irish terrier, and
Pickles, a gamecock. Said Mr. Wain
arrlght, first officer of the Indrapura
"All this talk about nature faking is
rot. for I can tell yon things tbst hsp
pened on this ship that neither Presi
dent Roosevelt, Dr. Long, Mr. Roberta,
nor Chauncey M. Depew has ever seen.
Ion wouldn't believe, for Instance, that
the gamecock can clean the deck In
ten seconds of every living thing. And
Mr. Roosevelt would perhaps not be
lieve that Pickles has a habit of Jump
ing on the back of Cbow, digging bis
spurs Into the Chinese dog's hide, snd
then calmly sttemptlng to pick Chow's
ey s out The last time we rescued tbe
dog It took tbe entire crew of forty -sey
en Lascars to get Pickles from bis back.
We tried to clip Pickles' spurs, but they
resisted the sharpest knife, and Anally
the smith shaped some metal raps, nice
ly rounded, so ss to make tbe spurs
harmless.
"Next day Pickles began picking the
dog In the port side with bis beak. He
kept It up every day for a week, and
then be switched to tbe starboard side.
Finally one day the howls of the cbow
dog again resounded through the steam
ship. Tickles wss In bis accustomed
place, his capped spurs dug deep Into
boles which be bsd picked, and be was
again trying to pick out Chow's eyes."
Vivian Tuthlll, tbe Indrapura's third
officer, told a nature story about a
snake and a monkey which be got at
Singapore and which fought a battle
to the death. The snake was a beauti
ful reptile of tbe garter variety, and
tbe monkey was a busby-faced little
fellow of sweet temper and great agil
ity. One morning tbe snake and mon
key were found In deadly battle. Tbe
monkey was kilted snd the snake crawl
ed Into Its skull snd circled about In
It, entering In at one eye and out of
snotber. Finally be got all knotted up
and died. Mr. Tuthlll dried tbe outfit
under tbe fierce tropical sun In the Red
Sea and to-day he shows his friends
tbe fantastic souvenir of the bleached
monkey's skull with the little snake,
practically petrified, still entwined
through the monkeys' bead.
Second Engineer Fraser, of the
freighter Indravelll, lying almost along
side the Indrapura at tbe Bush stores
In South Brooklyn, told of a battle be
tween a cheetah on board the Indra
velll and a bulldog In this harbor. If
Roosevelt decides sgnlnst tbe cheetah
as sn easy victor over a bulldog he will
have to do so over tbe words of seven
British marines, stanch snd true.
The cheetah was chained to tbe port
rail on the sun deck snd was uncon
cernedly washing bis face as the two
men discussed him.
I've got a dog that can do that cat
In about two mluutes," said tbe longshoreman.
"Bring along the dog," said the steve
dore.
The cheetah paid no particular atten
tion to the dog when tbe latter was let
go snd made for the chained anlmaL
It went calmly on wiping Its face In Its
morning ablutions. The dog was with
in a foot of tbe cheetah when tbe latter
tuddenly raised both his front paws,
caught the bulldog between them st
the neck snd In a twinkling ripped blm
jpen. Tbe cheetah then continued his
washing exercises ss If nothing had
hapiiened. New York Evening Telegram.
The School of Experte-ae.
Stevenson says In his essay on "Youth
and Crabbed Age" that when the old
man reproves tbe youth snd points bis
folly by saying: "I thought so, too,
when I was your age," be Is really prov
ing the case of tbe youth. This Idea,
that youth must keep to Its own kind
of wisdom snd cannot take to Itself
ready-made the wisdom of age, apjiears
In a dialogue which the Chicago Trib
une prints :
"Daughter, you ought not to wear
those high heeled shoes. They will
make corns on your feet"
"How do you know, mamma?"
"By experience. I used to wear them
when I was a glrL"
"Did grandma tell you they would
make corns on your feet If you wore
them?"
"Sbe found out by experience. Just
ss I did."
"Hadn't she sny mamma to warn her
gainst wesrlng tbem?"
"Oh. yes."
"But sbe wore them, Just the same?"
To be sure."
"And you did, too?"
"Yea; that was what I wss telling
you."
"Well, If I ever hsve sny daughters
I ought to be able to give them a warn
ing against high heeled shoes from my
awn experience, oughtn't I?"
Then sbe put tbem on.
Osbe Gsshall (on the southeast cor
ner of the dry goods box) It must be
tur"ble f be ketched out In a brain
storm. HI Hemlock (on the southwest
corner of the dry goods box) Wy,
sll a feller'd bey t do 'nd be t h'lst
one o them paranoias, sn' he'd never
know 'twui rslnln'. Puck.
Wall Maaat Frarare.
Sydney Smith declared that the chil
dren of Bishop Pblllpntts osed te end
their usual prayers by praying for Earl
Grey, explaining that "paps tells as It
Is our duty to pray for our greatest
enemies," -London Spectator.
No msn need feel hurt if people say
be is not good looking.
asarlty at Satsss,
A ease of remarkable sagacity la
pair of ravens Is related In tbe Field.
Two collie dogs were bunting rsbblts
snd the ravens were sosrlng overhead.
As the dogs drove tbe rabbit out luto
the ojen tear the top of a hill It rsn
straight Into a trsp snd was csught
As the dogs came near the raveus came
down snd by loud croaking managed
to drive sway both. Tbey then started
to devour the rabbit, which they quick
ly dlspstcbed.
Baatpar."
The word "bumper," meaning a
drinking vessel, derived Its origin from
the Ruuisn Catholic religion.
It was the custom lu England In an
cient times to drink tbe health of tbe
Pope after dinner In a full glass of
wine. This wss called "ad boa pere."
from which we hare the contraction
"bumper."
Lak 1st Saaall Pfaasbers.
"I bear." said III Tragedy, "that
while you were playing In one of the
country towns a Are broke out la the
theater."
"Yes," replied Low Comedy, "and
there might have been a horrible panic
but for one tblng."
"What was thst?"
"There weren't enough people In the
bouse to create one.
u.ik.h m,m Snd Mra. Wlnstow's Sonthtos
Syrup the Iks I reoiedr to uas lot their chUdxaa
luring the teething period.
rear Thlasr.
"I don't suppose Miss Tsssay ever
bad any beaux when she was a young
girl."
"No, she wss too aigmnea ana old-
fashioned."
"And the men don t like her now,
either."
"No, she's too kittenish now." Phil
adelphia Ledger.
Wat Always Safe.
"Don't you think a msn ought to tell
bis wife sll about his buslneas affairs?
'I should say not A friend of mine
who was about to start en a Journey bor
rowed $50 from a rich old uncle and then
told his wife of It. He was wrecked st
ses, crushed In a rsiiwsy collision, or
something of that sort, snd when bis wife
collected his life insurance, of course, she
felt bound to pay bark thit loan."
Banking by Mail
WE PAY
4
INTEREST
Ob savings deposits of a dollar
or more, compounded twice
every year. It is lust as easy
to open a Savings Account with
ns by Mad aa if yon lived next
door. Send for our free book
let. "Banking by Mail." snd
lcaxn lull particulars. AdJroad
Oregon Trust &
Savings Bank
Portland, Oregon
Sixth and Washington Sts.
fTO , Vitus' ranre ana all Iterroaa OUraaaa
MA permanentlr eared nr Dr. Kline's urrat
Jrv. Rrsior.r. Hand fur niKi(iirm iu, tno
treaties, Im. H. Hauiae. ixL. ma arch bl, riuia.i-a.
Hla Eaay Job.
"Isn't this s wearisome sort ef oeeu
pstion?" ssked the customer. "You have
to remember so much, snd snswer so
many questions."
Not st all, madam," answered the
book store salesman. All I bave to
remember Is tbe titles, names of sutbors,
snd prices."
"You sell a great many of the popular
novels, don't you?"
Yes, ma am, but I don't bave to read
them."
If Hlht to Conaplala.
"See here!" cried the Irate man. "I
purpose to sue you. Look st my head !
You professed to cure) "
Wslt a minute," Interrupted the
maker of Fakeley's Balsam; "we ad
vertise merely that we cure partial
baldness snd not
"Well, I was only partially bald when
I started using your stuff; bow I
haven't a hair!"
"Well, then you're cured of your par
tial baldness, sren't you?"
"Dsset,"
It Is a strange fact that the word
"dunce," meaning a stupid person,
comes from the name of one of the
most eminent scholars of bis time,
Duns Scotas.
In tbe Reformation the works of the
schoolmen fell Into disfavor with the
reformers, snd Duns, who wss tbe
leader of the schoolmen, wss often
spoken of with scorn by the votaries
of the new learning. As time went by
the name of Duns became a byword for
utter stupidity.
Na Way Oat af It.
Rouget ds Liale was composing tbe
Marseillaise.
"It seems to be np to me to do some
thing of ths kind." he said. "Tbe people
have grown tired of hearing There'll Be
a Hot Time in the Old Town To-night'
and they're hollering for something
fresh."
Endeavoring to make It musical and
catchy, and as unlike "Hail, Columbia."
as ba possibly could, he tousled up bis
hair, sswed a few more notes on his vio
lin, and proceeded to grind out the
rhymes to fit them.
Dlseoaraajed.
Lovely Fancee Oh, George, I some
times think I would rather die than be
married I
George What darling! Rsther die?
Lovely Fsncee Yes; you don't have
to rehearse half a dosen times for that
yon know.
Mara Dasgsf Ahead.
"Captain," said the frightened passen
ger, "hsven't you got a big load ef people
on this boat?"
"Yes, sir," gloomily answered ttie cap
tain of the excursion steamer. "And thst
Isn't the worst of It As sooa ss we
reach St. Joe s good many of them sre
going to double op for tbe rat urn trip."
Chicago Tribune.
A Hair
Dressing
Nearly every one likes a fine
hair dressing. Something to
make the hair more manage
able; to keep It from being
too rough, or from splitting
tt the ends. Something, too,
that will feed the hair at the
same time, a regular hair-food.
Well-fedhalrwillbestrong.and
will remain where It belongs
oo the head, not on the comb!
Tha beat kind ef a testimonial
or ever slaty yeara."
Jk Had
l!i tc -U.ML
Alee aaeaatMtarers ar
a. a. .......
Caador.
Borem Hello, old man ! What's the
matter? You look disgusted.
Cutting Y'es, I feel that way.
Borem Why, what have you run up
sgalnst now?
Cutting You. I didn't see you soon
enough to escape. Philadelphia Press,
I Shake Into Year Shoes
Allen's Foot-Kme. A powder. It makes tight
or new shoes foel aaiir. Jt Is a certain cure lor
swuatlua. calloua and hot. tired, achlns fei-L,
Bold bv all PruirKttta. I'rlra 2.x). Trial nark-
axe mailed FKKK. Address Allen & UUiutud,
Litor,ew York.
Wily Woman.
"Women sre such convenient liars,"
declared Mr. Jefferson Judd. "When
the Wlgglnses were here to dinner yon
kejrt saying Mrs. Wiggins didn't eat
enough to keep a bird alive. You know
that wasn't so."
"Well," retorted Mrs, Jndd. 'Tliere'a
different kinds tit birds. You may
have had a canary In your mind while
I was referring to an ostrich." Kan
sas City Times,
L J
Don't Push
The horse can draw
load without help, if
reduce friction to almost
nothing by applying;
i
i
W
the
you IJl
MicaAxK
to the wheels.
No other lubri
cant ever made
wears so lonff
and saves so much
horsepower. Next time
try Mica Axle Griasc
Standard OU Co.
ENGRAVING Write Us
PLATES
TOR PRINTING
HICKS-CHATTCN
Portland Oregon
BRING VOUR TOOTH TROttrUM TO US
Before Coins tlaawhere.
DR. B. C. WRIGHT.
342'4 WaahingtenSt. Portland Oregoa.
ST. HELEN'S HALL
PORTLAND. ORt CON
A Girls' School nf tha bli(hcit elasa. Collegi
ate department. Wmle. Art. Klocullon. Gym
nasium, fall term oins rk-ptembar 16.
St NO TOR CATALOGUE
n
US It! E S SCO L LEG L
TENTH AND MORRISON STREETS
PORTLAND. OSCOON
A. P. ARMSTRONG, LL. ., PRINCIPAL.
Quality la our motto. Wa ed urate for success,
and sand each atudent to a position whm eon,
patent many mora calls for help than wa eaa
asset Individual instruction insures rapid pror
rasa. All modern methods of bookkeepina ara
Uuaht; also rapid ealculationa, correepondenea,
commercial law, offlca work, ita Chart lar ia
our shorthand aaay, rapid, lesibla. Beautiful
cataloyua. business forma and penmanship fraa.
C. Gee Wo
Tha Wall-Known
Reliable
CHINESE
Root and Herb
I DOCTOR
Hst mads a Ufa tturfr of roota and herns, and In that
Studv discovered and l. .,.,r. . ',Z "
aerlul r.mad.es. wu"u wn
1Z1"r.'?,t " ' -" Carres
" vrwmiwi, or itnout tha Aid
at a knife.
Ha OTt.ra r4mmm a r-. r-. . t. ...
Throat, Kheumatlsm, N.rrousnes;. Nrryou; Debo
T. Stomarh, Lirir. Kidney Triublcs: s'so Lost
. . nwnssana ah rrivatauta
A SURE CANCER CURE
Juat Reeelr.d (me Peking. China-Sate, Sara
. at cuanUICa
IP YOU ' APLICTF.D. DONT DELAY.
V roa cannot call write lor srmron klsnS 'and drca
ler. Inclose cants In stamps.
CONSULTATION FREE
ii11. CHINESE MEDICINE CO.
I62i Pirst St.. Cor. Morrison.
Portland, Or .arm
Please Mention This Paper.
P. N. U,
Ke, 34- 07
one who Is Ignorant of her charms.
WasiMr"hi "
vortlsars al,