AMERICANS CRY OUT FOR BARBERS
HANCOCK DESCENDENTS
ENLIST IN THE SERVICE
Kan Bernardino, Cal.— Five
great-great grande h I I <1 r i* n o f
French Tonsorial Artists Don’t Course I didn't want none o’ that sweet
spirits o’ vl’lets, so I says 'Non, non.’
John Hancock, signer of the
Know How to Clip Hair
Hi* forgot the sacred memory o' Lafay
Declaration
of
Independence,
ette an’ the spirits of '7*1 right there
have
Joined
Uncle
Sam’s army
or Shave Necks.
an' gave me a cussln’ In French. I
service from Ibis city. The men
didn't know whut It wus, hut It sound
are brothers, the fifth to Join be
ed like hot stuff
ing Dr. A. K. Hancock, who has
“ I remembered one word I thought'»!
received n commission ns first
get me «ait that plaee an’ says 'Oomby-
lieutenant In the dental section.
enT* That started another riot, hut
The others ure Heuford Ilnn-
finally the fat guy allowed It was *Cnt-
cock, W aller Clyde Hancock,
Soldier Boy T e ll» of Sad Experience fronk.' That's about eighty cents real
Leslie Hancock und Alvin J.
In Parle— Smelled Like a Soap
money, hut I paid It an’ got out after u
Hancock.
struggle with thut nightshirt they put
Counter When French Barber
There are several cousins of
onto me.
Got Through With Him.
the five brothers, also Hancocks
“ First look I had at that haircut was
and descendants of John Han
Field Headquarters, American Army In a store window. Kay, that guy’d
cock, In the selective druft con
tingents from Kan Bernardino.
In Fruucw.- Tide la a special appeal to sort o’ chopped nwuy the frlng«*s round
The Hancock family helped to
harhera and It cornea straight from tho my ears an’ tho back rt’ my neck, hut
build Kan Bernardino In the fif
Itarracka and billots o f tlio boys over he'd left about half the hair there, look
here. Every hair of their beads erlea in’ sort o' grayish, an' then he hadn’t
ties.
out for the clltipera and neck ahuve touched It none till he got up top, so
that they left buck home and will uot there wus a gray ring an’ then a black
ring. The gray ring looked like a
bo comforted.
mangy ruyuse. When I took my Htet- PUTS “PEP” INTO CHICKENS
The American aoldler «Imply cannot
hoii off I found he’d trimmed the front
underatand tho French Imrlter and It off an’ pasted It down with that smelly Vaccination, aa Advocated by the Uni
doean’ t look na If be ever would learn
versity of California, Seema to
siuff till I looked like the picture o’
how. When ho gets Ida hair cut he
Be Success.
some hoy violinist.
wanta It cut abort, he wanta Ida neck
"That was a swell layout. When I
ahaved, he doean't want little lovelock*»
Pomona, Cal.— Vaccination of chick
got hack to my outfit the gang asked
left hanging over Ida eyea and he
me was I the feller that sings love ens, advocated by a University of
doean't want "a lot o' muck rubbed on."
1 songs at that Folly Iii-rgulr vaudeville California poultry expert, und tried out
Add to that the dllllculty of telling the
place In Paris an' the sergeant tells me here by Henry Boon on his 500 hens.
Frenchman all thorn* thing.*» and the In
not to let none of them rough soldiers Is a rernurkuble bit o f Hooverlsm, ac
herent helpleaaneaa of a man In a bur-
Insult me, hut to stick 'em with my cording to Boon, who has reported that
ber'a chair, and you have u truly tragic
hatpin. Tln-n they offered to pny me his hens now scratch so energetically
flltuatlon.
j five cents apiece to let ’em dip the cor for worms thut he has to feed them far
He Looked Like a “ Teddy Bear."
ners o f their handkerchiefs In my hair less than formerly.
The poultry association here also
Here la tin* tale of a youngster In when they wns goln' out to see their
the (pinrterninater'a corpa, who drlvcM girls. It was all like that. I ain't hud advocates vaccination, asserting It pre
one o f the tmeka. Ilia ahuggy head no French haircuts since. Hay, ’don't vents disease, causes the fowls to lay
waa mute evidence of Ida curncutncaa. you think you could get some bathers more eggs und gives them an astonish
“ There ain't a barber In our outllt," over here that know enough to shave ing amount o f “ pep” to scratch for a
living.
lie aald, " ho by the time I got up to u feller's neck?”
I'arla I looked like n Teddy bear. First
thing I did waa to aak one of them
John Arina copa where can I get an
American haircut, lb* made out to tell
me about a place on a boulevard an' I
made him tell It to a coacher an' the
coacher drove me there. That'* the
only way In Purls make a John Arms
tell n coacher— then you can't get toaL
"W ell, I walked up three flights to
reach that barber shop. I never seen
no American barber shop that wasn't
on tin* first floor, t'p came a big fat
guy an' «hook bands an' took my Ktet-
non an' tln-n took me Into a big room,
an* It really was full up with Ameri
can barber rhalrs, I begun to feel at
home, specially when I stretched out
In one o f theta chairs with my feet on
the rest. Itlght away, though, a little
Frenchman conies up an' ties n big
apron around my neck an" puts m.v
arm« In It. A fter that It weren't no
use— that apron strangled me when
ever I trbsl to move or open my mouth.
“ Well, this guy says something, s o
I says 'Haircut,' an' he coines back
'Alrcoot? Ah. coupcr lea cheveux.' I
knew enough to say ‘Wee, wee,' nn’
we started. Hi* didn’t have no clip
pers. nn’ he kept nibblin' with a pair
o f nail scissors I guess. I didn’t know
ttie French for 'short' and there weren't
no real mirror there like there ought
to he, so I sat tight an' hoped for the
best. Pretty soon he discovered that
my hnlr wns dry; If he'd been drlvln'
Wire entanglements such ns these soldiers ure making nre used by the
a truek for two weeks su'd his been
dry, an' after some talk that I couldn't French with good results In places whf re posts cannot well he set up.
LONG LOCKS THE FASHION
WIRE ENTANGLEMENTS USED BY THE FRENCH
get—course I said 'wee' to he polite—
all o f a sudden he dumps a whole pint
o f some kind of enu de cologne onto
my liend.
Smelled Like a Soap Counter.
“ It smelled like the sonp counter at
n drug store. When 1 revived he’d
rubbed It all In. nn' say, I went around
with that smell for days. Couldn't get
It out. The hunch held their noses
when they seen me.
"This barber went right on Jabber
ing an’ me saying ‘Wee, wee,’ even a f
ter that dirty trick he done ine, when
all o f a sudden lie hands tno n bottle
full of that cologne an’ says 'Dees
fronk.' I figured out that meant the
bottle cost $2 an' he’d been Hellin’ me
one In French an' I not known It.
TOWN SPROUTS OVER NIGHT
Modern Mining Town Springs Up Sud
denly In Coal Region In
Kentucky.
Knoxville, Tenn.— Like towns bntlt
In the West during the wild gold fever
rush o f the days o f '49, n model mining
town Ims grown up over night In
the center of tin* virgin field In Harlan
and Letcher counties, Kentucky.
Klxteen hundred houses will bo com
pleted within fifteen months, sny otll-
clnls of tho United States Coal nnd
Coke company, subsidiary of the Unit
ed Klntes Kteel corporation, which Is
behind tho project.
At present ICO eight-room houses
nre under construction. A fter these
art* completed the building of the oth
ers will begin. Forty-eight million feet
of lumber altogether will be used.
A total o f 250,000,000 feet o f lumber
wns bought at n cost o f approximately
were marching over the Carpathians
In three columns, nnd the royal govern
Take Jonescu, Roumanian Statesman, ment had transferred Its cnpltnl to
Jassy. Whereupon M. Jonescu tele-
Almost Forgot Important
grnphed:
Advice.
Jassy 5920. Nov. 27, 1910. 12:40.—
Zurich,
Switzerland. — Statesmen Urgent.
“ Excellency Voplcka, American min
send queer telegrams, even at critical
times. And while busy foreign offices ister, Bucharest: 1 forgot to tell you
are revealing the private Intercourse that In the cellar o f my house there
of kaisers and czars, the Bucharest nre several bottles o f Rhine wine. Even
Lumlnu has pried Into noumanlan If you have to break Into the palnce, I
archives to tell an anxious world what beg you to take the wine nnd drink It
Take Jonescu telegraphed In a terse to my health. Again n thousand thanks
midnight telegram to Charles J. Vo-
“T A K E JONESCU.”
plcka, minister o f the United States to
Koumnnln. It was n rrltlonl hour for
An amiable disposition Is a good let
Boiimimla, for the German Invaders ter o f Introduction.
TE LLS VOPICKA TO GET WINE
construction of the 1,600 houses Is
completed. It will be o f brick nnd
will cost between $100,000 and $125,-
000
.
An Orator.
Howell— Front all accounts I take It
that Rowell Is a very eloquent speak
er.
Powell— Y es; I understand that hls
w ife Is Influenced by what he says
when be Is talking In bis sleep.
Have an Early Sunday.
In Heligoland the Sabbath begins at
six o'clock on Saturday evening, when
the church bells arc rung, and censes
on the following day at the same
hour.
EXEMPTS ONLY 1 OUT OF 20
Draft Boards' Decisions In Industrial
Cases Usually Upheld by
President Wilson.
Washington.— Only one In twenty
nppenls to President Wilson for draft
exemption on Industrial grounds tins
been decided In fnvor of the applicant.
It wns said nt the provost ntnrshnl
general's office.
In other ensos the
president has ratified the Judgment of
district boards that the applicant was
not Indispensable to a necessary war
Industry. About eight thousand np
penls have been received, but only a
small proportion decided.
Hold Your Temper.
Material for Wooden Shoe*.
Get ntad If you must, but don’t fly
For the stylo o f wooden shoes ended off the handle. Is the advise o f a sage.
sabots, basswood Is mostly used, but When you express yourself others see
willow Is preferred. Poplar, birch, wnl- what’s In you, nnd ns a rule see less
nut nnd beech nre nlso used to some than they thought wns there; but If
$ 100 , 000 .
extent In their manufacture.
you are silent you have them guessing,
A temporary commlssnry building,
and tho chances are that they wlU
240 feet long by 00 wide. Is also now
Thought for Today.
think there's more In you than there
being erected. The permanent com
Tho greut man Is he who does not really Is— which will be greatly to your
missary will be constructed after the lose hls child's heart.— Mencius.
advantage.
WASHINGTON IN LEAD
’ BRANDED AS MYTH
Favorable Hapert on Dairy Products in
Htorage
Market for Christmas
Mother Never Really Carried
Market Basket, It Is Declared.
Poultry Much Improved.
Tacoma, Wash.— Taking the lead in
Before Daye of Telephone
the production o f apples for 1917, the Even
Housewife
Seldom Went to the
state department o f agriculture reports
Grocery
or
the Butcher Shop.
the whole number o f carloads at 19,-
815. In some sections the yields are
A voice of protest rises In the East.
overrunning earlier estimates.
Scar- There, as elsewhere, sundry lecturers
city^of boxes, shortage o f labor and have been talking to women’s clubs
limited shipping facilities at times about the high cost o f living. Said
seemed alarming, but where proper ' one o f them :
"Housewives could reduce the cost
storage facilities were provided the
crop was secured with a minimum o f of food If they would market In per
loss. Varieties show a production as son. Too many market by telephone.”
follows, in carloads; Winesaps, 4087; I This Is a typical remark.
“ Our mothers and our grandmoth
Rome Beauty, 1815; Jonathan, 3329;
Newtown, 737; E Sopus Spitz, 1486; ers,” continued the lecturer, “ went
Delicious, 855; Wageness, 443; A r personally to the grocer and the
j butcher. They saw what they bought.
kansas, 255; other varities, 6826.
Other fruits shipped were 2112 car I And they used to carry It home with
loads o f peaches, 1465 carloads o f j them.”
The conclusion Is obvious, says the
pears besides those used by the fruit
product factories.
Cherries, prunes, Indianapolis News. Our mothers and
plum, apricots, strawberries and other our grandmothers, paying these dally
small fruits showed an aggregate of visits to the grocer anil butcher, were
able to buy seasonable products— and
965 carloads.
Some plants are already reporting the best o f the products— at lowest
shortage o f stock and they w ill not be I prices. They made their own selec-
able to fill their orders. This, says 1 tlons; they picked out what they
the department, should encourage all wanted.
growers to conserve every apple and
A woman took Issue with this state-
not allow any to go to waste in the ' meat. Others followed. This argu
orchards, packing sheds or eleswhere, ment, they said, has gone undisputed
because there is a good market value | long enough. As a matter of fact, our
in them, and as a food product they | mothers und grandmothers did very
should be saved.
little marketing In person. The tele-
Fruits and vegetables are in good | phone In their day was not used, to
demand for the holiday trade.
I be sure. There were few telephones
Poultry is having a good sale. | to be used. But 30 years ago— and
Dressed turkeys are quoted at 30 cents. even la more recent times— the gro-
cer's boy called daily, recited some
! new items of stock, jogged the pa-
I tron's memory with a few questions
regarding the quantity o f potatoes,
sugar, flour and salt on hand, took the
j customer’s order and departed. Moth
Wheat— Bulk basis fo r No. 1 grade: er saw the goods fo r the first time
Hard white — Bluestem, Early Bart, i when the grocer’s boy, later In the
Allen, Galgalus, Martin Amber, $2.05. j day, delivered them.
Soft w hite— Palouse bluestem, forty
And In grandmother’s day, the worn-
fold, W hite Valley, Gold Coin, W hite
j en protesters declared, four-fifths of
Russian, $2.03.
W hite club— L ittle
! the marketing was done by sending
club, Jenkins club, white hybrids,
Johnny or Mary to the grocer or the
Sonor, $2.01. Red Walla Walla— Red
| butcher. And many of us who are
Russian, red hybrids, Jones fife, Cop-
something over thirty and not yet
pei, $1.98. No. 2 grade, 3c less. No.
turned sixty, regardless of sex, can
3 grade, 6c less; other grades handled
find without effort, in the depths of
by sample.
memory, personal evidence to substan
Flour— Patents, $10.
tiate this claim.
How many times
M illfeed— Spot mill prices: Bran,
were
we
brought
complainlngly in
$33 per ton; shorts, $36; middlings,
$46; rolled barley, $60@62; rolled I from play to “ go to the grocer’s?”
And at the tender age of seven or
oats, $62.
Corn— Whole, $84 per ton; cracked, eight or nine, did we do much select
ing when we thus filled the household
$85.
Hay— Buying prices: Eastern Ore order? Very little, as we recall it.
gon timothy, $25<ii26; alfalfa, $24 I On the contrary, we took what the
per ton; valley gTain hay, $24; clover, grocer gave us and hurried home with
the purchase, making sure both com
$22; straw, $8.
Butter— Cubes, extras, 45@46c per ing nnd going that we kept safely in
pound; prime firsts, 45c.
Jobbing hands or pockets the little brown book
prices: Prints, extras, 46@48c; car in which the purchase was duly and
tons, lc extra; butterfat, No. 1, 52@ carefully recorded by the grocer or
the grocer’s clerk.
53c, delivered.
Times have changed. Johnny and
Eggs — Fresh ranch, current re
ceipts, 47@48c per dozen; candled, Mary go seldom nowadays to the gro-
| oer or to the butcher or to the baker.
50c; selects, 55c.
Poultry — Hens, large,
20c; per Mother rings them up nnd delivers her
pound; small, 18c; springs, 18@19c; order by telephone. But— is the dif
ducks, 20c; geese, 14@18c; turkeys, ference very great? Is it sufficiently
live, 20@22c; dressed, choice, 30@ great to account for the vast increase
304c.
in the cost of groceries and meats
and bread and rolls? Substituting the
Veal— Fancy, 15@16c per pound.
telephone for the grocer boy's dally
Pork— Fancy, 17@18c per pound.
Vegetables — Tomatoes, $2.60 per visit or fo r marketing with the chil
crate; cabbage, l f @ 24 c per pound; let dren as proxy will hardly seem to
tuce, $2@2.25 per crate; cucumbers, some of us, now that memory Is
$1.35@1.75 per dozen; peppers, 15@ aroused, to account for the higher
17c per pound; cauliflower, $2.25@ cost o f living.
2.50 per crate; sprouts, 1 0 @ llc per
pound; artichokes, 85c @ $1.10 per
All Wrong.
pound; garlic, 7@84c; squash, l|c per
Bobble was put to bed by hls nurse
pound; pumpkins, 14 c per pound; cel about the time it began to» get dark.
ery, $3.50@4.52 per crate.
He then awakened early In the morn
Sack Vegetables— Carrots, $1.25 per ing, but was told by his nurse not fo
sack; beets, $1.50 @ 1 .7 5 ; turnips, talk or he would awaken his parents
$1.50; parsnips, $1.75.
j in the next room.
“ Well, this Is a
Potatoes— Oregon, $1.25@. 160 per funny world for little boys,” he said.
hundred; Yakima, $1.50@1.75; sweet “ You have to go to bed when it gets
potatoes, 44c per pound.
j dark, and they won't let you get up
Onions— No. 1, $2.50@2.75; No. 2, I when It gets light.”
2 per hundred.
Green fruits — Apples, $1 @ 2.25;
Bee’s Intelligence Overrated.
pears, $1.25 @ 2.25; grapes, 7c per
The intelligence of the honey bee
pound; cranberries, $13.50@16.50 per has been greatly overrated, according
barrel.
to Everett F. Phillips, who Is the
Hods— 1917 crop, 16@20 per pound; government expert on bee culture.
1916 crop, 13@15c.
He says that this Insect really has no
Wool— Eastern Oregon, 50@60c per adaptability at all, but a wonderfully
pound; valley, 55@60c; mohair, long perfected instinct.
Success In bee
staple, 55c.
keeping. therefore, depends upon study
December 24, 1917.
ing the bee nnd giving It exactly what
Cattle—
its imperious instincts require. For
Med. to choice steere.. . . $ 9.75@ 10.50 example, the space between the wall o f
Good to med. steers.......
8.75@ 9.65 n hive nnd the comb In which the
Com. to good steers........ 7.25@ 8.40 | honey Is to bo placed must be exactly
Choice cows and heifers. 7.00@ 7.85 a quarter o f nn Inch. I f It is more
Com. to good cows and hf 5.75@ 7.35 the bees will store honey In the space,
Canners..........................
3.00@ 5.50
| and if It Is less they will seal It closed.
Bulls................................ 4.50@ 7.06 In either case the hive must be broken
C a lv e s ............................
7.00@10.00 open to get the honey.
Stockers and fe e d e r s ....
6.00@ 8.00
Hogs—
“ T h e Terrapin War.”
Prime light h o g s ........... $15.35@15.50
“ The Terrnpln war” was a nick
Prime heavy h o g s ......... 15.40@15.60
name used by the opponents o f the
P i g s ................................ 13.50@14.50
war o f 1812 on account of the em
Bulk .............................. 15.50
bargo against trade with England or
Sheep—
$ 13.00@13.50 commercial intercourse with Canada.
Western lambs
12.50ft 18.00 They said this cutting o f commerce
Valley lam bs..
Yearlings........
12.00f«£12.50 was like a terrapin drawing within
ll.75tiil2.25 Its own shell, though ns n matter of
Wethers..........
E w e s ........... .
8 . 00 @ 10.00 fact n terrapin always has good rea
son for such action.
j
J
j NORTHWEST MARKET REPORT
J