Estacada progress. (Estacada, Or.) 1908-1916, September 28, 1911, Image 2

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    DOINGS OFTHEWEEK
SO C IE TY LE AD E R , W H O SE E X P E R IM E N T A L F A R M FOR SU F­
F R A G IS T S IS F A ILU R E .
Current Events oi Interest Gathered
From the World at Large.
General Resume o f Important Events
Presented In Condensed Form
fo r Our Busy Readers.
A tugboat at Vancouver, B. C.,
pulled her entire stern out while tow­
ing a big log raft
An ensign was killed and several
men wounded in a fight with hostile
natives in the Philippines.
Nearly 1,000 clerks have struck in
the general offices o f the Illinois Cen­
tral railroad at Memphis, Tennessee.
Germany is trying to prevent a war
between Italy and Turkey, fearing
other powers would be drawn into
such a struggle.
A New Brunswick, N. J., under­
taker who is running for the office of
sheriff, used his automobile hearse to
display election signs.
Four persons were killed in a Chi­
cago tenement house fire.
A woman
weighing 154 pounds was carried from
the fourth floor by firemen.
A woman committed to the Oregon
insane asylum has been making her
living as a shoemaker and passing
herself for a man for 49 years.
A daughter o f ex-Governor Rich­
ards, o f Wyoming, with her husband,
were found shot to death on their
ranch near Redbank, Wyoming.
» n t». o. it. r . ni i u o v i .
A Newport butler organized a
D E S TR O Y ED FROM O U TS ID E ,
“ smart set” o f 100 among the serv­ R E V O L U T I O N T H R E A T E N S SP A IN
ants o f wealthy society people and
General Strikes Called and Nation is Ruins
of
Battleship
Maine Are
made himself "social dictator.”
Under
Martial
Law.
Cleared
o
f
Slime.
A Chicago couple have been " g e t ­
Madrid— Spain is face to face with
Havana— The Maine was destroyed
ting married” repeatedly, each time
giving the minister a counterfeit $20 a crisis equal to that following the by an external explosion.
There no
bill and getting $10 in good money in riots in Barcelona in 1009.
The agi­ longer remains any doubt as to the
change.
tation and the power o f the agitators manner in which the United States
Dissolution o f the Steel trust pre­ on the masses have increased in pro­ battleship was sunk in this harbor on
sents a stupendous problem and has
portion to the rigor o f the repressive j the night o f February 15, 1898.
caused great stir in Wall street.
measures undertaken by the govern-1 The cofferdam about the wreck his
Canada has voted against the party
..
. .
,
I been pumped out and the mud cleared
which favored reciprocity by a large
What, at its origin, was purely a
r
r
labor movement, now has developed awaY to a greater extent than ever
majority.
War is on between settlers and lum­ into a revolutionary conflict, a com- before. The clearing away o f wreck-
bermen over fine redwood forests near mune having actually been proclaimed af,e reveals the double bottom o f the
at two towns near Valencia and the I ship with part of the keel standing in
Ukiah, Cal.
authorities driven out.
“ Progressive” Republicans
deny
The affiliated trades unions have a perpendicular position 28 feet higher
that they are planning to nominate decided to call a general strike all than the natural position.
Hughes for president.
over Spain, and the government has
This perfectly confirms the report
decided upon the drastic step of “ sus­ and testimony which Ensign Powel-
San Francisco wins its fight for a
pending the constitutional guarantee” son gave before an investigating board
right o f way to the ferry landing for
throughout the country.
This virtu ­ after the disaster and which was based
a municipal street railway.
ally means martial law.
upon reports made to him by divers
Meetings have been forbidden. The j just after the explosion,
It is estimated the Alaska salmon
m ilitary authorities, it is said offi- j It is indicated by engineers here
pack will amount to 2,800,000 cases.
daily, will not assume control except , that such a tearing o f the ship’s bot-
The "annexation speech” o f Champ m extreme cases.
tom could not have been produced by
Clark in the last session of congress
A t Bilboa troops fired on a crowd an interior explosion. It is further
is blamed for the defeat o f reciprocity that was endeavoring to free prison­ said that no regulation m ilitary mine
by Canada.
ers, including strike leaders, who could have wrought such terrific
The treasury department has or­ were being taken through the streets. havoc. It must have been a huge
dered the prohibition o f the importa­ Twenty-six persons were wounded. mine, as Captain Sigsbee and others
suggested at the time; perhaps a sug­
tion o f tea containing artificial color­ The situation is grave.
King Alfonso has signed a decree ar mill boiler or large cask loaded
ing matter.
suspending the constitutional guaran­ with explosives.
Fifty-six'convicts in the Colorado tee throughout Spain.
This act,
penitentiary attended the matinee which had been under consideration
performance at a theater and en­ for some days, was taken to give the
joyed the play hugely.
government power to deal sharply and
promptly with the revolutionary agi­
PO RTLAND M ARKETS.
tation now fermenting in many parts
Wheat — Export fbasis: Bluestem, o f Spain, especially in the cities and
Marseilles, France— Fire broke out
84///86c; club, 80fe81c; red Russian, industrial districts, where republican
in the ammunition hold o f the French
80c; valley, 80(//,81c; 40-fold, blftt and revolutionary plans are being
battleship Liberte and the vessel blew,
82c; fife, 80@81e.
furthered under cover o f workingmen’s
up and sank 19 minutes later. Nearly
M illstuffs— Bran, $24.50//z.25 per strikes.
ton; middlings, $82; shorts, $25.60
The most serious situation is at 500 o f the crew are dead. The bat­
(z/26; rolled barley, $33.60//Z 34.50.
Valencia, where a general strike was tleship was built about five years ago
Corn—Whole, $33; cracked, $34 per declared.
The
city was at once and was a sister ship o f the Verite,
ton.
placed under martial law, and though which met with misfortune at the
Barley New feed, $310/32 per ton; there was more or
less rioting maneuvers a few days ago, going on
brewing, $37.
throughout the day, the authorities the rocks and suffering considerable
data— New white, $280/28.50 ton.
had matters pretty well in hand until damage before being pulled off.
Hay— No. 1 Eastern Oregon tim­ after dark,
when the disturbers
T A F T B U S Y IN S T . L O U I S .
othy, $ 150/16; No. 1 valley, $14; al­ vented their fury in an attack on the
falfa, $12; clover, $8.50; grain hay, officials in the adjacent township o f
$90/11.
Urges Power o f Impeachment In­
Cullera.
Poultry— Hens, 16/ilfiJc; springs,
stead of Recall for Judges.
The rioters murdered a judge and
150/15jc; ducks,
young, 160/17c; wounded other officials o f the court
St. Louis — During a moderately
geese, 11c; turkeys, 18fti)19c.
which had been engaged in the trial busy
day
here
Saturday, a
President
j
u
ajf
iici
c
uatuivinj,
i comcuv,
Butter — Oregon creamery, solid of those arrested earlier in the day. I T aft made sjx speeches, took a forty
pack, 31c; prints, extra.
The mob was finally dispersed hy mile automobile ride, opened the local
Eggs Fresh Oregon ranch, can- guards from the custom house.
football season by tossing the pigskin
died, 30c per dozen.
onto the gridiron at St. Louis Univer­
Pork Fancy, 110/ llJ c per pound.
Gila Monster Bites Man.
sity, laid the cornerstone o f a new Y.
Veal Fancy, 13//z.l3Jc per pound.
I«os Angeles — Prompt treatment W. C. A. building, sat through nine
Fresh Fruits — Cantaloupes, 60cot:
innings o f exciting baseball between
$1.25 per crate; peaches, 500/.75c per with a vacuum pump saved the life o f
Louis -------
and ------
Philadelphia
Na
E. Eigenherr, a miner from the St.
H ia w n a a
-----
-----------
.
.-----«---------
box; watermelons,
75c///$1.25 per Mathias
hundred; plums, 500/l76c per crate; Arizona, who was bitten by a Gila | tional League teams, visited the Ma-
prunes, 1 Jo/2c per pound; pears, 600/ monster while he was exhibiting the sonic Club to be made a life member
$1 per box; grapes, 6!>c0/.$l per box; animal on the street here. He had o f that organization and, after ad-
the monster secured in a box. He met dressing a throng in the Coliseum in
apples, $10/1.75.
Vegetables — Artichokes, 75c per some friends and tried to open the box I the evening had nothing to do but
dozen; beans, 50/10c; cabbages, $1.50 to show the creature, when it fastened travel all night in order to be in the
0/ 2 per hundred; corn, 250/ 30c per its teeth in his arm. Eigenherr was insurgent state o f Kansas on Sunday.
On the eve o f entering this reputed
dozen; cucumbers, $10/1.25 per sack; rushed to the receiving hospital, where
hostile territory.
President
T aft
eggplant, 5/z8c per pound; garlic, 10 the surgeons succeeded in extracting
The brought forward the suggestion o f a
0/12c per pound; lettuce, 40o/50c per the poison from the wounds.
wider powrer o f impeachment as a sub­
dozen; hothouse lettuce $1,250/1.75 monster was shot by a policeman.
stitute for the more radical proposal
perh ox; peppers, 6o/fic per pound;
o f a judiciary recall.
Girls’ Smokes Now Cost.
radishes, 12Jc per dozen; sprouts, 8c
500 SAILORS PERISH WHEN
FRENCH WARSHIP BLOWS UP
per pound; tomatoes, 60/// 75c per box;
carrots, $1.50 per sack; turnips, $1;
beets, $1.75.
Potatoes Oregon, l j c per pound;
sweet potatoes, 2Jc per pound.
Onions California, $1.50 per hun­
dred.
Hops 1911 crop, 320/ 33c; olds, nom­
inal.
Wool Eastern Oregon, 90/;16c per
pound, acording to shrinkage; valley
150/ 17c; mohair, choice S6o; 37Jc.
Catete Choice steers, $5.40o/5.50;
good, $50/5.25; fair, $4.75(//5; med­
ium, $4,600/ 4.76; poor, $3.75o/ 4.50;
choice cows, $4.50(f/ 4.75; fair. $4ra
4.40; common, $2.60^3.60; Extra
choice spayed
heifers,
$4.75(<T.5;
choice heifers, $4 .500/4.75; choice
bulls, $3(4/3.25; good, $2.75(0 3; com­
mon, $2if/2.50; choice calves, 200
pounds and under, $7.26(4/7.60; Rood
to choice, $6/1/6.50; common, $4(4/5;
choice stag*. $4.50(4/4.75 goeci, $4.25
(n 4.50.
H og»- Choice light hogs. $7.75(fi 8;
good, $7.50(ft 7.76; fair, $7.25(0.7.60;
common, $7(4/7.25.
Sheep
Choice yearling wethers,
coarse wool, $3,360/3.65
Choice yearling wethers, east of
mountains, $3,350/3.65; choice twos
and threes, $3(4/3.25; choice lambs.
$4.75(</5; choice yearlings, $4.60(o
4.75; good to choice lambs, $4.25(4/
4.50; culls, $2.50(o 3.
Los Angeles — Cigar makers and
other tobacco factory workers, includ­
ing girls, who have been accustomed
to having all the “ free smokes” they
want, must pay hereafter for the
makin’s” and for all the cigars they
use, according to a ruling o f Claude I.
Parker, collector o f internal revenue.
‘ The government is deprived annually
o f vast amounts o f revenue by this
practice o f tobacco factory employes
taking cigars, cigarettes and and to­
bacco from untaxed stocks,” said the
collector.
Aviator Falls to Death.
Dewitt, la.— John A. Rosenbaum,
o f Chicago, was killed here when his
aeroplane fell from a height o f 50
feet. He had been in the air only 20
minutes when he lost control o f the
machine. Rosebaum was making a
trial flight when he met death. Other
aviators previously had failed to make
successful flights in the same machine
and Rosenbaum declared he would
prove that the machine would fly. He
had just started to descend.
Etna's Lava Bars People,
Catania, Italy — The eruption of
Mount Etna again was renewed Wed­
nesday. Shots from guns o f people
who have been shut off by the lava
were heard, but the people could not
be rescued.
Four Firms Undar Fire,
San Francisco— Four Pacific Coast
business combinations are under in­
vestigation by the government as be­
ing in restraint o f trade, and indict­
ments against them are likely to be
forthcoming within 10 days according
to «advices received here from Los
Angeles.
A part o f the government’s evi­
dence, it is reported, already has
been presented to the Federal grand
jury. It is understood that action
also is contemplated in San Francisco,
Portland, Tacoma and Seattle.
1
Cheese Poisons Child.
Portland — One wee slice o f cheese
nearly caused the dea h o f Florence
George, aged three, late Saturday
night, and a like amount o f the same
food brought hours o f agony to her
four brothers. Theodore, seven; Roy,
10; Willim , 13; Adam, 16.
The
physician was called at 11 o ’clock and
it was not until daylight that he con­
sidered the little one out o f danger.
The illness was due to limburger.
It resulted in ptomaine poisoning.
FRENCHMEN DIE BRAVELY.
Men on Burning Battleship
Fire to the Last,
Fought
Toulon, France— More than 300 offi
cers and men o f the French battleship
Liberte lost their live« when the ship
was torn apart and totally destroyed
in the harbor here by an explosion of
her magazines.
The'battleship Republique was bad­
ly damaged and the battleships Demo­
cratic and Verte suffered heavily from
the masses o f twisted iron and armor-
plate hurled upon their decks
This is the greatest disaster that
has ever befallen the French navy,
and in magnitude is almost without
precedent in the annals o f the world's
fighting ships.
The explosion which wiped out one
o f France’s most powerful battleships
occurred at 5:30 o ’clock in the morn­
ing. It was the result o f an outbreak
o f fire. The flames spread rapidly in
spite o f all efforts to extinguish them,
and reached the magazines before
there was time to flood them. The
magazines exploded with tremendous
violence, sowing death and destruction
in every direction. The naval author
¡ties now estimate the killed at be­
tween 350 and 400. It will be neces­
sary to go through the ship’s muster
rolls before a full list o f the victims
can be prepared.
Several men were taken alive from
the torn and twisted mass o f wreck
age, and hope was strong that others
might be reached.
The work of rescue began quickly
An ambulance station was installed in
the arsenal and Admiral Marin-Darbel
Maritime Prefect, superintended the
work of extricating those imprisoned
under the shattered steel.
The first body recovered was that of
an officer, which was hauled from un­
der an awning with a boathook.
Forty bodies have been taken out and
94 injured transferred to the hospital.
Electric shears to cut through the
plates and powerful floating cranes to
lift the masses of steel were used
Divers are at work exploring the in­
terior o f the hull. The Liberte now
looks as if the bows had doubled over
onto the stern. Men could be heard
groaning and screaming for help,
which often the rescuers were unable
to give.
The lower deck was a heartrending
sight. One man’s foot was held under
a mass o f steel weighing tons. A fte r
three hours’ vain effort to lift the
mass a surgeon amputated the foot.
Through a hole in the armor portions
o f bodies, contorted and piled to­
gether, could be perceived, all o f them
charred by the flames.
One o f the survivors, a warrant
officer who came out o f the explosion
with only a slight cut on the forehead,
said :
"T h e fire broke out in the general
store, among cans of oil, turpentine,
paint and other inflammables.
In
spite o f every effort flames spread
to the coal bunkers, and after that it
was difficult to prevent them from
gaining the powder magazine. It was
about 5 :30 o’clock and dawn was
breaking, before the danger seemed to
be realized. Assistance was then be­
ing sent us from the port and three
other warships lying in the harbor.
Disaster Regarded as Evil Omen,
Paris— The minister o f marine is
preparing to render aid to the famnles
o f the victims o f the Liberte explosion.
Everywhere the explosion is regarded
as an evil omen, coming on the heels
o f the peaceful settlement o f the Mo­
roccan difficutlies with Germany.
According to Captain Jaurès’ re­
port, there were 32 officers on the
warship. One third o f the officers
and 72 men had been given shore leave
over Sunday and the remainder o f the
lost crew were seeping between decks.
The minister o f marine thinks that
the fire started in ' the storeroom, ad­
jacent to the magazine, and short-
circuited the electric wiring, causing
the explosion.
As the sailors took
their posts for fire drill slight explos­
ions were felt, followed by flames
bursting out all over the after quar­
ter.
Explosions then followed at brief
intervals, the third shooting the fire
mast high. By this light the crew
was visible fighting the flames from
the magazine.
Ghost Stories to Be Exploded.
London— A young girl living in
Coatsb/idge has been driven mad by
fright on seeing what she thought to
be a ghost, and Dr. Wallace, o f the
Spiritualistic Alliance, uses the case
as the text for a sermon on the danger
o f telling ghost stories to children and
frightening them into obedience with
threats to give them to the " b ig black
man” or some other bugaboo. Dr.
Wallace is organizing lyceums for
children to teach them the truth about
“ ghosLs, ” so they will have no fear
o f the old-fashioned creepy tales.
Nuptial Fee Spurious.
Chicago — A dozen preachers are
condoling with one another over the
loss o f good money o f which they were
defrauded by a counterfeiter and a
woman accomplice, who repeatedly
presented themselves for marriage
and also presented false $20 bills in
payment o f a $10 fee. The clergyman
who told o f the fraud refused the
names o f the preachers involved, as
secrecy had been agreed on in a de­
nominational meeting at which the
victims condoled with one another
over their losses.
Mirror "T a lk »” 42 Miles.
Pasadena, Cal.— Equipped with an
ordinary mirror, a little more than a
foot square, Ray Clifford, o f Pasadena,
heliographed messages from the top of
Mount Wilson to the steamship Yale
as it was leaving San Pedro harbor.
The distance was about 42 miles.
The feat was unique in that young
Clifford used an ordinary mirror in­
stead of the combination o f several re­
quired in heliographic work.
The
ship answered the signals.
The Courtship °£
M iles
Sta
With Illustrations by *
*
H ow ard Chandler Christy
( C opyright,
Thm D o b b s -M e r r ill Com pany)
Filled with the name and the fame of
of the Puritan maiden Priscilla;
Every sentence began or closed with
the name of Priscilla,
Nothing was heard in the room but Till the treacherous pen, to which ho
confided the secret,
the hurrying pen of the stripling,
Or an occasional sigh from the labor­ Strove to befray It by singing and
shouting the name of Priscilla!
ing heart of the Captain,
Reading the marvelous words and Finally closing Hl3 book, with a bang
of the ponderous cover.
achievements of Julius Caesar.
After a while he exclaimed, as he Sudden and loud as the sound of a sol­
dier grounding his musket.
smote with his hand, palm down­
Thus to the young man spake Miles
ward.
Standish, the Captain of Ply­
Heavily on the page: “ A wonderful
mouth:
man was this Caesar I
Love and Friendship
Such as you think best adapted to win
the heart of a maiden.”
When ho had spoken, John Alden,
the fair haired, taciturn stripling.
All aghast at his words, surprised, em­
barrassed, bewildered.
Try lug to mask his dismay by treat­
ing the subject with lightness,
Trying to smile, and yet feeling his
heart stand still in his bosom.
Just as a time-piece stops in a house
that la stricken by lightning.
Thus made answer and spake, or
rather stammered than answered:
“ Such a message as that, I am sure l
should inauglo and mar It;
If you would have It well done— I am
only repeating your maxim—
You must do It yourself, you must not
leave it to others!”
But with tho air of a man whom noth­
ing can turn from his purpose,
Gravely shaking his bead, made an­
swer the Captain of Ply mouth:
“ Truly the maxim Is good, aud I do
not mean to gainsay it;
But we must use it discreetly, and not
waste powder for nothing.
Now, as l said before, 1 was never a
maker of phrases.
I can march up to a fortress and sum­
mon the place to surrender.
But march up to a woman with such a
proposal, 1 dare not.
Pm not afraid of bullets, nor shot
from the mouth of a cannon,
But of a thundering ’N o !’ point-blank
from the mouth of a woman,
That I confess I’m afraid of, nor am I
ashamed to confess it!
So you must grant my request, for
you are an elegant scholar,
Having the graces of speech, and skill
in the turning of phrases.”
Taking the hand of his friend, who
still wus reluctant and doubtful,
Holding it long In his own, and press­
ing It kindly, ho added:
"Though I have spoken thus lightly,
yet deep Is the feeling that
prompts me;
Surely you can not refuse what I ask
In the name of our friendship!"
Then made answer John Alden: “ Tho
name of friendship Is sacred;
What you demand In that name, I
have not the power to deny you!”
So the strong will prevailed, sub­
duing and molding the gentler,
Friendship prevailed over love, and
Alden went nn his errand.
(T O B E C O N T IN U E D .)
“A Wonderful Man Was Caius Julius
Caesar.”
“ When you have finished your work,
I have something important to
tell you.
Be not, however, in haste; I can wait;
I shall not be impatient!”
Straightway Alden replied, as ha
folded the last of his letters,
Pushing his papers aside, and giving
respectful attention:
“ Speak; for whenever you speak, 1
am always ready to listen.
Always ready to hear whatever per­
tains to Miles Standish.”
Thereupon answered the Captain, em­
barrassed. and culling his phrases:
“ T is not good for a man to be alone,
say the Scriptures.
This I have said before, and again
and again I repeat it;
Every hour in the day, I think it, and
feel It, and say it.
Since Rose Standish died, my life has
been weary and dreary;
Sick at heart have I been, beyond the
healing of friendship.
Oft In my lonely hours have I thought
of the maiden Priscilla.
She is alone in the world; her father
and mother and brother
Died in the winter together; I saw her
going and coming,
Now to the grave of the dead, and
now to the bed of the dying,
Patient, courageous, and strong, and
said to myself, that if ever
There were angels on earth, as there
are angels in heaven,
Two have I seen and known; and the
angel whose name is Priscilla
Holds in my desolate life the place
which the other abandoned.
Long have I cherished the thought,
but never have dared to reveal It,
Being a coward In this, though valiant
enough for the most part.
Go to the damsel Priscilla, the love­
liest maiden of Plymouth,
Say that a blunt o!d Captain, a man
not of words but of actions,
Now to the Grave of the Dead.
Offers his hand and his heart, the
hand and heart of a soldier.
he was right when he said it
Twice was he married before he was Not in these words, you know, but
this In short Is my meaning;
twenty, and many times after;
Battles five hundred he fought, and a I am a maker of war, and not a maker
of phrases.
thousand cites he conquered;
He, too, fought in Flanders, as he him­ You, who are bred as a scholar, can
say it in elegant language.
self has recorded;
Finally he was stabbed by hla friend. Such as you read In your books of the
pleadings and wooings of lovers.
the orator Brutus!
Now, do you know what he did on a
certain occasion in Flanders,
When the rear guard pf his army re­
treated, the front giving way. too.
And the immortal Twelfth Legion was
crowded so closely together
There was no room for their swords?
Why, he seized a shield from a
soldier,
Put himself straight at the bead of
his troops, and commanded Uie
captains.
Calling each by his name, to order
forward the ensigns;
Then to widen the ranks, and give
more room for their weapons;
So he won the day. the battle of some
thlng-or-other.
That’s what I always say: If you wish
a thing to well done.
You must do it yourself, you must not
leave it to others!”
You are a writer, and I am a fighter,
but here is a fellow
Who could both write and fight, and
in both was equally skilful!”
Straightway answered and spake John
Alden, the comely, the youthful:
“ Yes, he was equally skilled, as you
say, with his pen and his weap­
ons.
Somewhere have I read, but where 1
forget, he could dictate
Seven letters at once, at the same
time writing his memoirs.”
“Truly,” continued the Captain, not
heeding or hearing the other,
“Truly a wonderful man was Caius
Julius Caesar!
Better be first, he said, In a little
I! erlan village.
Than be second In Rome; and I think
Stolypin’ * Slayer Hanged.
Kiev, Russia— Dmitry Bogroff, the
assassin o f Premier Stolypin, who was
condemned to death hy court-martial,
All was silent again; the Captain
has been hanged. Before his execu­
continued bis reading.
15.000 Socialists Protest.
tion the young man asked that he
Nothing was heard in the room but
Paris- A mass meeting o f Socialists might see a rabbi, but refused this
the hurrying pen of the stripling
and I.ahorites to protest against a war consolation when informed that the
Writing epistles important to go next
with Germany brought out 15,000 per­ interview must be in the presence of
dav by the Mayflower,
officials.
sons here.
The Finishing Touch.
"No,” says the eminent actress ear
nestly, "I cannot approve of the fash­
ion that so many members of my pro­
fession have of being photographed
continually.”
The reporter makes some feverish
notes and she continues:
“ It seems to me that because one
Is on the stage Is no reason why he or
she should consider his or her face
of absorbing interest to the public.”
She continues for half a column and
as the reporter is stowing away his
notebook she smiles sweetly and say9:
“ Here is one of my latest photo
graphs for you to use with the inter­
view. I sat for it only yesterday, so
you may be sure it has never before
been reproduced.”—Judge.
Unconventional it lea.
"If I were you, Mrs. Jelllcks, 1
wouldn’t smile so often. You show too
much of your gums.”
"Mrs. Gunderby, you ought to wash
your children’s faces occasionally;
Billy’s nose needs attention right
now.”
“ I’m asking you for your daughter,
Mr. Singletree, because that’s the cus­
tomary thing to do; we’re going to
marry anyway.”
“ Your talking doesn’t disturb me a
bit, Mr. Feathertop; I ’m paying no at­
tention to It.”
“ Yes, George, I admire your new au­
tomobile very much. I wish some oth­
er man was taking me out in I t ”
Most Unusual.
"A little Boston boy is visiting the
family of a neighbor.”
“ Does he wear glasses?”
"No.”
“ Is his first name Carlyle, Emerson
or Plato?”
“ No His chums call him Bill.”
.“ Does he speak seven languages,
discuss political economy, the Darwin­
ian theory, the hermetic philosoph­
ers?”
“ Why, certainly not. He’s just a
healthy youngster with a big appetite,
who likes to play around the streets
with other boys.”
“ How singular.”
There Was a Difference.
A local Protestant clergyman has
decided, much to the disappointment
of his congregation, to accept a call
to another pulpit In an eastern city A
few days ago, one of the neighbors
met the little son of this minister,
and said:
“ So your father Is going to work in
Rlanktown. is he?”
The little boy looked up In surprise.
“ Oh, no,” he said. "Only to preach
there.”
His Wonderful Memory.
"Excuse me," said the absent minded
professor, “but haven t we met be­
fore ?’’
“ Why. yes.” replied the beautiful
girl. "Our hostess Introduced us just
before alnuer tonight.”
"Ah, I remember!
I never forget
a face!”— Stray Stories.
Every Sentence Began er Cloeed With “ Priscilla.”