m mi Iltr ,.
ittiM REO
Burn Distillate.
Co two to three times as far
for less money.
The Rco Distillnte Adapter prevents all carbon trouble-it leaves you
free from high priced gasoline. TESTED AND GUARANTEED.
No Advance on Reos YET. $875 f. o. b. Factory.
Northwest Auto Co.
F. W. VOCLER, Pre. C. M. MENZIES, Salesmanager
Broadway at Couch St., Portland, Oregon.
Paint Now
It's a Good
INVESTMENT
See Your Dealer
NEW PERKINS HOTEL
Fifth Mid Washington Bts., Portland, Or.
The homelike stopping place
for those who appreciate the
dollar's full worth.
Room with Bath. . .
Room with Detached Bath
Breakfast and Luncheon
Dinner ....
(1.50
1.00
25c
85c
AGENT WANTED
Business necessity every Mer
chant buys on sight. Big profits.
Exclusive territory. Free samples.
Sells from 5 to $100. Write quick
for territory. Sayers, 637 Railway
Exchange, Portland, Ore.
The Panama Canal Defenses
are powerful, but not us powerful an arjru
merit as our Cream Checks are in defense
of our policy of more money for the man
who miiks the cow. Send u your next can.
HAZELWOOD CO., PORTLAND, OR.
NO COMPASS NEEDED
Simple Method of Determining
Latitude.
HIDES, PELTS, CASCARA BARK
Wo want all you have. Writ for prices and
shilling tuns. THE H. I". NORTON CO.
S3 North front St., Portland, Ore.
"America, I Love You," and "Yon'll Be
mere 11
must go to war. Two liitr sontr hits for 25c and
names and atldrPRses of live musical friends.
POSTAL MUSIC CO., Boi 1073. Seattle. Wash.
Double Tread, Puncture Proof Tires
Made from your old ones. Last lonpr
)ns Bran New Tiros. WE ALSO BUY
OLD TIKES. We pay as high as 10c
per lb. for such as we can uae in Double
Tread work, and the highest market
(or junk. Ship your Tires at once or write us.
OREGON VULCANIZING CO., 550 Wuliajtse St., Porllud, On.
HAWTHORNE AUTO SCHOOL
The only Automobile School on the Pa
cific Coast maintaining1 a Gas Tractor
Dept., IJBins Holt Catterpillar, C. L. Beat
Tracklayer and Wheel Tractors, both in the
school and operating field.
446 Hawthorne Ave., Portland, Ore.
Portland Y. M. C. A. Auto School
Day and nijrht classes. Expert trainimr.
!n repairing, driving and machine work,
Including: forg-e. lathe, Bhaper, drill press,
tractors, etc. Time unlimited. COMPE
TENT CHAUFFEURS AND MECHAN
ICS SUPPLIED. WHITE US.
ELECTRIC MOTORS
Bought, Sold, Rented and Repaired
WALKER ELECTRIC WORKS
Burnside. cor. 10th. Portland, Ore.
High Stakes.
"There, I just knew you'd forget,"
said the suburbanite's wife as she met
her husband at the door. "Why didn't
you go to the employment agency, as
I told you, and bring home a cook?
You men can't tie trusted to remember
anything."
"One moment, dear," Interrupted
hubby. "1 didn't forget. I went to
the employment agency and picked
out a cook a good one, too, it you can
judge by her references."
"But where is she?"
"I'm sorry, my dear, but I lost her."
"Lost her? Nonsense! How could
that happen?"
"I got into a pinochle game on the
way home in the train and Jim Briggs
won her away from me."
Cool a burn with Hanford's Balsam.
Adv.
O. A. C. Commencement Week,
Oregon Agricultural College, Corval-
lis. Commencement at the Oregon
Agricultural College, including the an
nual Pageant, Alumni day, baccalaur
eate, class day, and graduation exer
cises, will begin Friday afternoon,
June 2, and conclude Tuesday noon,
June 6.
The pageant, which consists of The
Seasons and Russian Fete Day, will
occur Friday. Music for the occasion,
furnished by the College Orchestra,
directed by E. Helller-Collens, will con
sist chiefly of classics, which will be
interpreted in the processionals and
dances. On Friday evening, June 2,
the senior play will be presented by
the class.
Alumni day, Saturday, June 3, has
been chosen with a view to accommo
date both the alumni who are teach
ing and those who can spare only a
week-end for the annual get-together.
The usual noonday luncheon will be
followed by the business meeting and
by the class reunions, which are to be
the big feature of alumni day this
year. The 'lis, '06s, '01s, and so on
are to hold special reunions, inaug
urating a plan of five-year meets that
promises to be a popular phase of
these annual alumni events. In the
evening the graduating class will be
guests of the alumni at the annual
ball.
The baccalaureate service this year
will be held in the afternoon, and the
usual evening union meeting of the
churches will not be held. This plan
has been inaugurated with a view to
avoid any interference with regular
church exercises on a day when the
church-goers are especially interested
to meet their outgoing student-mem
bers.
Monday, June 5, will be class day.
In addition to the usual out-door fes
tivities of the graduates, there will be
a review of the cadet regiment in the
afternoon, and the graduating recital
of the school ot music in the evening.
The academic procession and gradu
ating exercises will occur Tuesday
morning at ten o'clock.
Unusual interest . attaches to the
events of Commencement this year by
reason of the fact that all regular Col
lege students will be in attendance.
Point It to Be Bur of Location of the
North 8tar, Which li Really All
the Astronomy Necessary
to Know.
There Is a very simple way by
moans of which the novice, untrained
in astronomical observation, can de
termine his latitude, without the aid
of complicated and expensive appa
ratus, if you were situated on the ejuator,
thu North star would be directly north
of you. This star must be learned and
Identified, bo that it can be picked out
anywhere at a moment's notice. This
Is all the astro lomy you need know
as the location of this star will give
the latitude.
When half way to the Noith pole
the North star is midway between the
zenith and the northern horizon. At
the pole It Is directly overhead. In
all other places its "angle" varies, be
ing, for example, 30 degrees at New
Orleans, 40 degrees at Philadelphia,
and so on. The altitude ot the North
star is the latitude of a place north ot
the equator. All that is necessary
then, to determine the latitude, Is to
measure the angle of the North star
and thub determine the altitude ot the
celestial pole. This will give the lati
tude. Take a pair of ordinary compasses.
Open them, and place one point In a
a level window sill, holding the arm
upright. Now point the other arm of
the compass at the North Polar star.
The ahgle thus formed by the pair "t
compasses will be fairly accurate, pro
vided the pointing has been done care
fully and the other arm is held at
right angles to the Bill.
When the compasses have been ad'
Justed, as explained, proceed to meas-
ure the angle formed by the arm of
the compass. This will indicate your
latitude. For every degree of curva
ture of the earth, the North star rises
on degree from the horizon. It is
thus an easy matter ' see your lati
tude from the number of degrees made
by the angle of your compass.
Another way to discover the latitude
of any given place and a method
much more often used Is by means
A Shortage In Paper.
A commodity even bo indirectly re
lated to the demands of war as paper
Is showing the prevailing tendencies
to such a degree as seriously to em
barrass publishers. The higher price
of paper stock and the difficulty of
obtaining it at all in England was a
chief factor in the discontinuance In
March of the London daily Standard,
after a career of sixty years, for a con
siderable portion of which It was the
most important organ of the middle
claBBes In England. In America the
demand for papor has been increasing
tor six months as a result of general
business activity. At the same time,
supplies used In its manufacture have
been decreased by war conditions, and
In some cases have almost been shut
off. The supply of old rags 1b affected
by the cutting off of the importations
rrom the Luropean peasantry and by
the demand for the making of guncot
ton. The chemicals used in bleaching
the paper produced by sulphuric acid
and alum are being devoured by the
manufacturers of explosives, while im
portations of jute have fallen oft until
the price is doubled. An embargo has
been placed on shipments of wood
pulp from Norway and Sweden, while
Canada stopped access to her vast re
sources some time ago. The newspa
per publisher Is, indeed, hard hit by
war conditions in many other items
of supplies besides the basic one of
paper stock. Practically everything
going into the manufacture of a dally
newspaper has Increased in price from
10 to 60 per cent inks, owing to the
advance in the cost of acids and dyes,
rrom 300 to 3000 per cent; type, owing
to the higher cost of lead, tin and an
timony even the rubber and felt
blankets wrapped around the press
rollers add their quota to the increased
"cost-of-living" of the metropolitan
daily. From "The Progress of the
World," in the American Review of
Reviews for April, 1916.
Cause for Delay.
Paddy Dolan bought a watch from
the local jeweler with a guarantee to
keep it in order for 12 months. About
six months later Paddy took it back
because it had stopped.
"You seem to have had an accident
with it," said the jeweler.
"A small one, sure enough, sir.
About two months ago I was feeding
the pig and it fell into the trough.
"But you Bhould have brought it be
fore." said the Jeweler.
."Sure," replied Paddy, " I brought
It as soon as I could; we only killed
the pig yesterday." Chicago Herald.
Discovered.
"What are you wrinkling your nose
about? Are you sniffing at this as
semblage of ladies?"
"Not at all. I was merely trying to
determine if I could locate the particu
lar perfume that my wife affects. Ah,
here she is." Louisville Courier-Journal.
STOP SCRATHING!
RESIN0L RELIEVES
ITCHING INSTANTLY
That itching, burning skin-trouble
which keeps you scratching and dig
ging, is a source of disgust to others,
as well as of torment to you. Why
don't you get rid of it by using Resinol
Ointment? Physicians have pres
scribed it for over 20 years. In moBt
cases, it stops itching instantly and
heals eruptions promptly. It is very
easy and economical to use. Sold by
all druggists. Adv.
Willing t5 Stop.
A prisoner was in the dock on a
serious charge of stealing, and the
case having been presented to the
court by the prosecuting solicitor, he
was ordered to stand up.
"Have you a lawyer?" asked the
court.
"No, sir." .
"Are you able to employ one?"
"No, sir."
"Do you want a lawyer to defend
you in the case?"
"Not partickler, sir."
"Well, what do you propose to do
about the case?
"W-e-1-1," with a yawn, as if wear
ied of the thing, "I'm willin' to drop
the case, far's I'm concerned.
of the sun. Observations of the sun
are depended upon by vessels at sea.
The first thing to do is to ascertain
what is knov.a as your true norm
south line. To do this you must know
your longitude and bave the correct
time. Next, measure ihe altitude or
the sun at apparent noon thst is,
when its shadow Is north. Place a
curved piece of cardboard in the win
dow, with the blind drawn down to the
wood of the upper window. The angle
made by the window will then Indicate
the altitude of the sun with sufficient
accuracy.
Next, consult vhat Is known as the
Analemma" (see diagram). If you
11-e In the northern hemisphere you
must subtract from the declination of
tne sun (which the analnmma gives
you) the sun's declination. Subtract
thin result from 90 degrees, and the
remainder Is your latitude. Popular
Science Monthly.
KOVERALLS-i
f
mi
d3
neg u.s.Pat .off.
Keep Kids Kleen
The mot practical, healthful, playtime
irmenU ever invented tor children I to
yean of age. Made in one piece with
drop back. Easily alipped oa or of
Easily washed. Nofaglitelasticbandi
to atop circulation. Made in blue
denim, and blue and white hickory
tripea for all die year round. Alio
liffhtef weight, fast-color natena m
dark blue, cadet blue, tan or dark red
for summer wear, aU appropriately
trimmed with fast -color gala tea,
ftladein Lhrtch neck with elbow
aleevea and high Deck aad long
leevea.
75c the suit
If tout dealer cannot supply rou,
re will tend ihrm. charges prepaid
on receipt ot price, 75c each.
A New pope U Tney
Suit A " Rip
Beware of Imitations. Look f of
the Two Horses on the Label,
Levi Strauas & Co., San Francisco
Awirtal 6RAW0 PR:ZE at the P. P. I.E.
Made by
For nail in the foot use Hanford's
Balsam. Adv.
Worse Yet.
"My daughter Is taking singing les
sons, and she keeps up such terrible
yowling that I never go home except
to eat and sleep.
"You're in luck. My daughter Is
taking cooking lessons, and I don't
even dare to eat at home."
At the Dinner.
Dashaway (nervously) Look here,
old fellow, don t- you think you d bet
ter tell them not to call on me?
Cleverton Don't be worried; they
wont; Im quite sure they have all
heard you before. Judge.
P. N. U.
No. 16, 1918
VL'BEH wrtttaa- ta senrtan aa '
" ttoa this par.
Learning Enough.
"Don't you think every girl ought to
be able to cook?
"I think every girl ought to be able
to talk intelligently on the subject.
anyhow. Southern Woman's Maga
zine.
A Cheering Thought
Miss Plain Ma says I'm too young
to marry.
Miss Pert Well, you won't be by
the time yon get a proposal. Boston
Transcript.
i u to i,JL e to hi
ttA. Y-V
v rto
...
yf EQUATOR lH
Sy
10,
tJf
toy? ' W
H THE ANAIEMMA 10
Rl '" Wa
ioVi . Jj
O a? o 30-
SUN FAST SUN. Slow
YOUNG WIFE DOES HER BEST
Treatment of Sores.
Apply Hanford's Balsam lightly and
you should find that gradually the
Bore will diminish in size. The older
the case the longer it will take, but it
will help the hard cases, after other
remedies fail. Adv.
Noblesse Oblige.
"Mother," said little Mabel, "do mis
sionaries to to heaven?"
"Why, of course, dear," her mother
replied.
"Do cannibals?"
"No, I'm afraid they don't."
"But, mother," the little girl insist
ed, "if a cannibal eats a missionary
he'll have to go, won't he?" New
York Evening Post.
Gently Telling.
"How did they break the news to
the young wife of her rich old hus
band's death?"
"Oh, nothing could have been kinder
or more tactful. Her best friend told
her she had some bad news, but it
might have been worse, for Bhe would
look simply stunning in widow's
weeds." Baltimore American.
Woman's Way.
Patience; I understand Sheffield
England, employs women car conduc
tors.
Patrice: Well, some women always
did like the opportunity of telling a
man to "move up closer," you know.
Yonkers Statesman.
Wanted to Put Clothes on Chickens,
Pair Turnips Two and Two and
Wash Celery With 8op.
She was a young wife, Just married,
from boarding school, and, although
educated regardless of expense, didn't
know beans from any other vegetable.
Hence this dialogue with the cook:
Now, Biddy, what are we to bave
for dinner?"
"There's two chickens to dress,
mum.
I'll dress them the first thing.
Where are their clothes?"
"Why mum, they're in their feathers
yet."
"Oh, then, serve them that way.
The ancient Romans always cooked
their peacocks with their feathers on.
It will be a surprise to hubby."
'It will that, mum. Shure, it you
want to help, you could be parln' the
turnips."
"Oh, how sweetl I'll pair them two
and two In no time. Why, I bad no
Idea cooking was so picturesque."
'I think, mum, that washln' the cel
ery do be more In your line."
'All right, Biddy. I'll take it up to
the bathroom, and I've some lovely
Paris soap that will take off every
speck."
'Thank you, mum. Would you mind
telling me the name of tho ' asylum
where you was eddlcated? I think I'll
have to take some lessons there my
self if we be going to work together."
Too Abstruse.
"Your boy soems to know all the
scientific ins and outs of farming."
"Yes," answered old Mr. Cobbles.
"But I don't see that It does me any
good."
"Why hot?"
"He spends so much time In what be
calls elucidating his theories that me
an' the hired men never do get a full
day's work done."
Practical Thought.
"I intend o spend the rest of my life
laboring fo. the good of humanity,'
said the round-shouldered man who
was wearing spectacles with celluloid
rims.
"In that case, I presume you will
give your services without charge?"
"Well, no. I still believe the laborer
is worthy ot his hire, even though be
happens to be a reformer."
GOOD NEW8.
How is
Your Mouth?
Are you wearing a temporary
and insanitary rubber plate?
Do you find your mouth in
flamed and irritated? You
Bhould have a permanent,
clean, sanitary cast aluminum
plate. Let me make one for
you. Unless you are perfectly
satisfied you will not have to pay for it.
DR. ELOF T. HEDLUND
(Drs. Hedlund, Loy and Skiff, DentUt,)
45C-I59 Morgan Bid;., 4th Floor, Washington it Broadway
PORTLAND, OREGON
Work Guaranteed. Prices Reasonable. Phone Marshall 9B
f 1
.dLJ
Blind Eight Years, 8ees Now.
Unable to see for eight years, Ed
ward Claycomb, a painter of this city,
is recovering his sight by degrees. In
1908 he fell from a house he was paint
ing and in addition to his other inju
ries he detached the retinas of both
eyes. He became blind. Specialists
of a dozen cities were consulted, and
they all told him his case was hopeless.
For the last several weeks his sight
has been returning, and now he can
see and read large letters and distin
guish between colors. Physicians are
puzzled. Claycomb is hopeful that his
sight will become normal. Altoona
(Pa.) Dispatch to Philadelphia Norttt
American.
PORTLAND Y. M. C. 1
will fit any ambitious young Man or Wom
an for hitrh-cLoas position in
Bookkeeping, Stenography. Salesmanship
To men this Includes valuable athletic,
aquatic and mombership uriviletreB, al
though tuition cost is lens than el tie where.
Valuable courses can also be had in
Grammar grtvlo and Collie Preparatory
Subjects. WHITE FOU CATALOG.
ink
"There's one thing that 1 have kept
from you."
"Tell me the worst."
"I failed to get a diploma at the
cooking school."
"Come to my arms, dear one; I love
you more than ever."
They All Do It.
"That actress is a perfect marvel.
She must be 50 years old if she's a
day, and yet she is able to play the
part of a girl of 16 and make it abso
lutely convincing."
"That's nothing. You ought to see
my grandmother when she's made up
for a tango tea."
New Light on History.
Here Is the essay of a Filipino sail
or who was told to write about George
Washington: "George Wassingham
was sore because Amerlcal persons is
not free, He sale to England on
(naming his own battleship) shin and
Bay to King 'I express deciaraclon of
lndypendence for Amerlcal persons.
King he say 'Nothln' doin' and Mr.
Wassingham tell Admiral Dewey to
shoot turret guns at him. Blme-by
King, he say he will not rule Amerlcal
persons egaln. 'Let George do It,'
say King and today Amerlcal persons
is free." Exchange.
Queer Indian Custom.
The Haldu Indians living on the
Queen Charlotte islands of our Alas
kan possessions, were until a few
years ago divided strictly Into two
tribes, Ravens and Eagles, both strict
ly exogamlc, which is to say that
Eagle men had to Marry Raven wom
en and rice versa, the children a
cording to a trlba' law, becoming mem
bers of the mother's tribe and return
ing to that group when half grown, to
receive training and ultimately In
herit the family proDert
GIRL GOULD
NOT WORK
How She Was Relieved from
Pain by Lydia EL Pinkham'a
Vegetable Compound.
Taunton, Mass." I had pains In 'joth
sides and when my periods came I had
to stay at homo
from work and suf
fer a long time.
One day a woman
came to our house
and asked my
mother why I was
suffering. Mother
told her that I suf
fered every month
end she said, ' Why
don't you buy a
bottle of Lydia E.
Pinkham'a Vegetable Compound? ' My
mother bought it and the next month I
was so well that I worked all the month
without staying at home a day. I am
In good health now and have told lota of
girls about it" Miss Clarice Morii!,
22 Eussell Street, Taunton, Mass.
Thousands of girls suiter in silence4
every montn rather tnan consult a phy
sician. If girls who are troubled with
painful or irregular periods, backache,
headache, dragging-down sensations,
fainting spells or indigestion would take
Lydia E. Pinkham'a Vegetable Com
pound, a safe and pure remedy made
from roots and herbs much suffering
might be avoided. , .
Write to Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine
Co., Lynn, Mass. (confidential) for free
advice which will prove helpful.
Ik mm
Ml U J
Iitti ht r r
His Little Scheme.
Pennibs My boss baa worked me
ten hours a day for the last six years,
but I'm going to get even with him.
Inkerton How are you going to do
it?
Pennibs I'm going to marry his
only daughter then I'll work him
twenty-four hours a day as long as he
lives.
Where He Kissed Her.
Patience You Bay Will kissed you
on the cheek last night?
Patrice Yes.
"Well, didn't he ever kiss you be
fore?"
"Oh, yes." 1
"Where?"
"In Asbury park."
Couldn't Go the Pace.
"So your dyspepsia Is no better,
eh?" said the doctor. "Did you fol
low my advice and drink hot water
an hour before breakfast?"
"I tried to, doctor," replied the dis
couraged patient, "but I was unable
to keep it up for more than five min
utes at a stretch."
Just So.
"1 notice that when a general is re
tired in Europe his sovereign usually
gives him an additional title."
"You know what that's tor,
course?"
"I was Just wondering."
"It's something for him to land on
when he's bounced."
An Exception.
"The man who laya by something
for a rainy day isn't going to be
caught napping," remarked the thrifty
person.
"Perhaps not," answered the wastrel,
"unless he happens to lay by a 'best
seller' with the expectation that it will
keep him awake.
Acting for the Movies,
"Now, you must move your mouth
when the pictures are being taken, and
you are supposed to be speaking.'
"But I don't know anything to say,
"Well, then, chew gum."
On the Club Veranda.
"Nobody wants to play bridge with
Mrs. Lean. She talks all the time."
"I suppose she's quiet when she'
dummy?"
"Quiet? She talks twice as much!
He Thought of th3 Bill.
Doctor Emdee What gave Mm the
relapse?
Nurse His wife thoughtlessly came
ato bis room dressed in a new gown
Mid hat.
Ordinary powders and dynamites
waste much of their energy by shatter
ing and pulverizing. To get the best
results in land-clearing operations the explosives
should disrupt, crack,, split and heave the stumps
and at the same time lift and remove the roots for
easy handling. The explosives that do this are
FARMP0WI
JTUMPINO AGRICULTURAL.
made by a Western Company especially to meet Pacific
Coast conditions. More than 2,000,000 pounds used every
year for stump blasting in Washington and Oregon alone.
There are two Giant Farm Powders Giant Stumping
Powders for wet soil and Eureka Stumping Powder for blast
ing in dry soil. They do their work at the lowest possible cost.
Test one case. Compare it with any explosive that you
have ever used. After you have blasted a dozen stumps you
will understand why those who have once used them always
continue to use Giant Farm Powders.
Our f rA Viiti-ilr nn te" how t0 ,ave money 'n land-clearing. It
vyui lice uuunutl shows how to make land-clearing easier by
Stump Blasting "sin, Gian' F"m pg7de.rs- h",e othcr
r " boots on Boulder Blasting, Iree Planting,
Subsoil Blasting, and Ditch Blasting. Write today for the book in which
you are interested, Your name on a post-card will bring it.
THE GIANT POWDER CO., Con., JBS, San Francisco
"Everything for Blotting"
BRANCH OFFICES. S.attle, Spokana, Portland, Sail Laka Ch, Dmnr
The Old and Reliable
or. iscac I nompsons
EYE WATER
la both a remedy for weak, inflamed
yea and an Ideal eye wash. Keep
Iar lira mil uj ikr will help keep you.
9C,it.nDrealiiitrmr
"" Mill won r
i reoHpt ef priot
WRITE FOR r'HKK BOOKLET
JOUN L. THOMPSON SONS CO.
,, 143 River St., Troy, N. Y.
i
If
Easy Job.
This little example of Irish wit was
related at a recent dinner of the
Wheel Club:
A newly landed son of Erin waB
gaping along a New York street when
he chanced to turn into the office ot
a lawyer, thinking it was a store. He
was considerably impressed with the
fine furnishings, and approaching the
only occupant of the room, a man busy
at a desk, asked:
'"Could you be telling what you sell
here In this fine place?".
"Certainly," was the retort, uttered
in rather an impatient tone. "We sell
blockheads."
The Irishman looked around and
nodded In understanding.
'Sure and you must have a fine
trade, I'm thinking," he commented,
You have but one lift.
Pain In the side? Rub on and rub
In Hanford's Balsam thoroughly. Adv.
His Limit.
One of the freshmen at Yale Imme
diately applied to the proper officer
of the university upon the day of his
entrance into that Institution for in
formation touching his father's Btay
there before him.
'I should like to see my father's
record," said he. "lie was in the class
of '75."
"I shall be glad to show you the
record," said the officer, "but have
you any special reason for consulting
it?"
"Well," said the youth, "when I left
home dad told me not to disgrace him
and I wish to see just how tar I can
go."
Metal Grain Bins
RAT PROOF RAIN PROOF
RUST PROOF
WRITE FOR PRICES
Agents W anted
Coast Culvert & Flume Co.
PORTLAND, Kenton OREGON
nave Haaltby, Strong, Beautiful Eye
Ocullata aud Physicians used Murine jya
Remedy many years before It was offered ae a
Domestic Eye Medicine. Murine la Still Com
pounded by Our Phyalctana and guaranteed
by them ae a Reliable Relief for Byee that Need
Care. Try It In your Kyea and in Baby's Byes-
No Smarting- Just Bye Comfort. Buy Murine
of your Drug gist accept no Substitute, and if
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MUKINB Exit KKMKUI CO., GiUCAUO
Thaw Expected.
"As a result of their long dally glides
over the ice they will be married in
the spring," says a report of a ro
mance between a Chicago girl and her
skating instructor.
And In the spring the ice will melt,
after which points of uncongeniality
may develop. Louisville Courier-Journal,
Precautions.
The Chinese have numerous tradi
tions concerning their famous philoso
pher Confucius. One day, they say,
he was meditating in the fields outside
the city of Tientsin when he saw a
woman weeping bitterly beside a fresh
grave that she was fanning vigorously.
He was touched by her evident grief
and said:
"O sorrowful one, what is your
trouble?"
"Your honorable excellency, my hus
band Is dead."
"No doubt you are to be pitied, for
he was doubtless a good husband;
but why are you fanning his grave?"
"Exalted one," replied the woman,
and her voice choked with sobs, "my
husband bade me not to marry again
till his grave was dry."
What Was Heard.
Father What did you and John talk
about last night, dear?
Daughter Oh, we talked about our
kith and kin.
Small Brother Yeth, pop, I heard
'em. He seth, "Kin I hev a kith?" and
she seth, "Yith, you kin!" Yaie Record.
Question of What
"A wise man may change his mind."
"My boy," replied Senator Sorghum,
"the greatest of all wisdom consists
in knowing when to change your
mind." Washington Star.
His Grateful Nephew.
A condescending uncle gave his
nephew $1 on his "bicycle fund." The
nephew took it without a word.
"Now what do you say?" the uncle
asked.
"It ain't enough," the nephew re
plied after some hesitation. Kansas
City Star.
Demonstrating It.
Mrs. Blnx I was Just reading about
a man 70 years old who has been sent
to the penitentiary for the fifth time
for burglary.
Mr. Blnx Yes, old age steals on.
Boston Globe.
Experienced.
"Did you ever Btudy French?"
"No, but I know this much: If you
ever see anything printed in French
on a bill of fare 10 to 1 It's some
kind of a stew."
"What's the news from the spring
training camps?"
"As near as I can find out, eight
teams are going to be tied for first
place in each of the leagues."
Be Reasonable
With Your
Stomach
Correct.
"What Is an egotist, pa?"
"An egotist, my boy, Is a man who
insists upon talking about himself
when you want to talk about yourself."
Realistic.
"I sleep like a log."
"With the saw going through it"
Boston Transcript
Don't overload it when it is
weak rather help it back to
its normal condition and thus
avoid a spell of Indigestion,
Constipation, Biliousness and
weakness. Try
HOSTETTER'S
Stomach Bitters
You will find it of great as
sistance. Get the genuine.