Ing Humors
Didn't Understand.
A FIG H T W ITH DOGS.
Mrs. Swaggerton—My
daughtet
F
l.r
c
.
Kaklmo Animal, that Dislikad
nasn
t
come
out
yet,
you
know
Dost people end cause many
W h ite M en .
, Mrs. Homeleigh—Indeed! What was
-pimples, boils and other she sent to prison for?—Ally Sloper.
In a long Journey by sled. In the re
besides loss of appetite,
gion of Great Bear Lake. Egertou It.
It Certainly Would.
feeling, fits of biliousness,
Young bud a trying adventure with
She What a happy world this would
Eskimo dogs, wbk-li he relates in "My
> and headache.
be If—
Dogs in the Northland." He had trav
He— If what?
Duer one gets rid of them the
She If men, could only believe all eled several days with hia own dogs
lid the way to get rid o f them
they aay.—Cincinnati Enquirer.
lo the point where the Indians were to
lild up the system that has
meet him and replace the tired dogs
His Reason for Sukide.
from them is to take
with fresh ones. When the dogs were
A New York man wrote as his rea changed, hia guide, who hail accompan
son for attempting suicide that he had
consulted 25 doctors, but none was ied him throughout the Journey to this
point, gave him a heavy whip, and said,
able to cure him of asthma.
"Now do not speak a word, and there
in combinntion the Spring
Sure Enough.
will he no trouble. They do not like
( b a r e.rcellence, of unequalled
Yeast—It’s hard to keep a good man white people, hut If you do not speak
to them they will never suspect, in
I in purifying the blood as \ down.
Crlmsonbeak—That's why they put
unequalled, radical and per such heavy monuments over some of their anxiety to get home.”
i I looked the fierce brutes over, says
them, I suppose.— Yonkers Statesman.
jures of
Mr. Young, placed my heavy whip so
Galt Rheum
I could instantly seize it. and made up
An Explanation.
Bad
Dolls, Pimple*
“ What kept you so late?" asked the my mind that 1 was ki for a wild ride.
The owner of the dogs applied his long
physician's wife.
i of Hum or Psoriasle
"Coming down on the elevated road | whip-lash to them, and away we start
»laonlng
Rheumatism
my professional services were very
Dyspepsia, Eto much In demand.’’ replied the belated ed at a furious gallop.
We had traveled some distance when
| no substitute, but be sure t* M. D. “ Man in first car was overcome
by the heat and by the time I got I was startled by a splendid black fox,
i ’s, and gut it today.
him straightened out another man was which dashed out of a rocky islatul on
discovered in the rear car almost froz our left. He struck across our trail, and
No Use at All.
en to death.”
made for another island of rocks half
ho has ofTended her)—Won't
a mile to our right.
Must Have Been.
[up at me?
The dogs fell into disorder and sped
I did. you'd kiss me again,
First Chappie— I wonder now, Chol- after him. As we had tifteeu miles yet
honest, I won't,
lie. how the donkey ever came to be , to go, it was not safe to he racing after
then what's the use?
used as the— er—emblem of stupidity?
Second Chappie (with a yawn)— a fox on this great lake. So 1 resolved
■
A Reminder.
Don’t know. I'm sure, deah boy; must to break the silence and bring the dogs
i back to the trail, even if 1 had to tight
rn—What have you got that have been before our day.
kd about your finger for?
; them.
Hia Style.
Pi—Oh. I've been getting mar-
! Bracing myself on my kmes, 1 grip
my wife doesn't want me to
Jeweler—Diamond shirt studs? Yes, ped the heavy whip so tliai I could use
sir; here's a set, neat little stones, for the handle of it us a club. Then 1 shout
»125.
ed to the dogs in Indian to stop und
.Manager Realizes It.
Customer—Huh! Out home in Chi
j turn to the left.
is something elevating in cago I can get—”
jnid the artist.
Jeweler—Ah! yes, pardon me. Here I The instant they heard m.v voice they
answered
the
manager, you are. Just look at these big flash did stop—so suddenly that guy carióle
ki taimy has the efTeot of stlm- es—three karats each! Sell you the went sliding on, past the rear dog of
bft.v Ideas as to salary."
set for »3.50.—Philadelphia Press.
the train. They came at me furiously,
j The leader of the train, the fiercest of
the four, began the attack. It was well
! for me that he did. for he swung the
others about Into such a position that
only one at time could reach me. As lie
sprang to meet me I guarded m.v face
with oue hand, which I wrapped in the
furs, while I belabored the dog over the
head with the oak handle of tile whip.
Is the greatest remedy in the world for all bodily
Three or four good blows were all
that he needed. Willi a howl lie dropped
on the ice, while the next one in the
train tried to get hold of me. One for
for which an external remedy may be used.
tunate clip on the aide of his head sent
Price, 25c. and 50c.
him tumbling over his lender. Then l
had to face the third dog. which proved
the ugliest customer of all. for his head
took a prodigious nmount of thumping
before he yielded. Falling to get li Id
of me. he tore the robes and the side
of the carióle, which was made of
B oys’ and Y o u th s '
<
j parchment.
Jack Knife Shoes; It was fortunate for me that the
S r>>
\
3^, _
Ask your dealer for the Jack < I traces of the fourth dog. fastened to the
Knife Shoe. Every boy gets a 4 I front of the carióle, so held him Imek
pocket knife with his pair of < that he was unable to do more than
shoes. Best wearing shoes. Razor < growl at me.
4 j When 1 liad conquered the third dog
steel knives.
I uncoiled the lash of the whip and
SE & P R IN C E , W holesalers, 87-89 First St., Portland, Or. |
shouted. "Marche!" The leader wheel
ed to the left, and away they flew. I
had no hesitancy In sp. nking now. The
Patent Leather.
ana’ s .Suicide Record.
dogs allowed no more desire for battle,
Clean
patent
leather
with
the
French
jlmost always holds a world'
hut only a desperate desire to reach the
suicide. In the first nine harness paste sold by harness makers. end of the Journey.
last year 250 men and 98 Apply lightly and then polish with a
koceeded In killing them- piece of soft cloth. Patent leather
BULLETS AS EVIDENCE.
|d another 367 made unsuc- treated in this way rarely if ever
lempts.
cracks.
Odd F a c t , D e v e lo p e d b y T h e ir P r o m i
I
F irst Aid t o th e Jibed .
W
Vs Sarsaparilla
and Pills,
>t. Ja co b s O il
ches a n d Pains •
jenenOy Oureu So A t » or nervousness
r first'lay'» ue*of I>r. Kline's Great Nervi
fl for F R E 1£ S’Z .OO trial buttloand treat
xt. Ltd. «31 Arch St.. Philadelphia, ttk
n e n ce in M u r d e r T r ia ls .
Mothers will Cl no Mrs. fiDnsiotr's Sooth.
Ing Syrup the best remedy to use tor their
Ohlldreu during the teething period.
Idolaters.
Related Kindness.
[surrounded with Idolators—
Mr. Smith (in street car)—Madam,
»omen who have gods many
| many. Their affections are take my seat.
Mrs. Jones (who has been standing
i things of the earth, per-
Id unsatisfying. Man's duty fifteen minutes)—No thanks; 1 get off
p h ip of the one true God.— at the next corner.
ge Adams.
Mr. Smith—That’s all right so do I.
G ood B eginning
blood is in good condition at the beginning of the warm season,
spared to resist disease and are not apt to be troubled with boils,
lackheads and blotches, or the itching and burning skin eruptions
' one’s life a veritable torment and misery.
is the time to begin the work of cleansing and building up the
1 strengthening the w e a k
mr constitution. During the HORRIBLY AFFLICTED WITH BOILS.
months we are compelled
J had a horrible
attack o f b o i ls
rs and breathe the impure
that broke out all
y ventilated rooms and of-
over my body and
over-work and over-eat, and
fr
o m w h ic h I
pe out-door exercise, and our
could got no pos-
»m e clogged with irnpuri-
! sible relief until
blood a hot-bed o f germs
I b e y an taking
of every kind, and warm
y o u r medicine,
sure to bring a reaction,
and from my ex-
p o r io n c e I can
isonous matter in the blood
safely say S. 8. S.
will break out in boils and
is the best blood
scaly eruptions and red,
bumps and pimples. Make purifier In ths world. _______
Xrs. U. P. BMTTHER8,
nningtliis season by taking
Wytheville, ▼•*
S. S. S. in tim e; it will not
your blood and destroy the
THE BEST TONIC AND APPETIZER.
¡sons, but promote healthy
While living In Sherman, Tea., I be-
oam e a victim of impure, watery
e Liver and Kidneys and
blood. I ran down in appetite and
good appetite at a time
energy; w»« soarcely a b le to get
about and had to stop off and rest
eed it most.
occasionally. I took 8. 8. 8. and be
a proves the digestion and
gan to improve at once, and alter a
le Stomach, and you are not thorough oourse became strong and
' haunted by the fear of Wj*think B. 8. tf. the best medicine I
every time you eat, or ever used aa an appetiser and gen
tonic.
J-
®COT5^
ith dizziness, nervousness eral
811 Bailroad street,
Borne, On.
ness. There is no reason
com ing of warm weather if you have your system well fortified
in a normal, healthy condition. It is the polluted, sluggish
invites disease germs, microbes and poisons o f every kind and
long train o f spring and summer ailments, break down the con-
d produce weakness, lassitude, and other debilitating disorders.
, Acne, Nettle-rash. Poison Oak and Ivy, and other irritating skin
sure to make their appearance unless the humors and poison#
are antidoted and the thin, acid blood
made rich and strong before the coming
t of warm weather.
A course of S. S. S. now would be
a safe precaution and a good beginning
and enable you to p a s s in comfort
through the hot, sultry months a n d
liseases common to spring and summer. S. S. S. is guaranteed
ible and is recognized as the best blood purifier and the most in
ti pleasant of all tonics. Write for on r book on “ TheB loodand
THE S W IF T S PEC IFIC C O . . ATLAN TA. GAm
The important part played In ninny
order trials by a flattened and mis
shapen bit of lead or steel, once In I lie-
form of n bullet, often leads to the de
velopment of some curious facts. A
leaden bullet will lose appreciably In
weight by being fired and the form of
the barrel may tend to reduce Its size,
in a rifle some of the lead Is taken off
by the grooves. The friction also
heats and tends to partially melt tlie
outside of the hall, and because of
this it changes its shape in the air.
One peculiar fact about a bullet Is
that it will very often make a wound
of entry smaller than the projectile
Itself, even in so brittle a substance
as glass. Another strange fact about
a bullet is that It will often pass
through intervening clothing, making
n hole that can hardly be noticed, anil
yet carry on Us (mint n circular piece
of cloth. The carrying of hits of cloth
ing, hair or dirt into wounds in such
a manner greatly enhances the dan
ger of peritonitis. Were it not for this
latter contact the bullet would not he
nearly so dangerous, as its rapid flight
and heating makes it practically ster
ile.
Blackened edges of wounds are more
likely to have been eattsed by a lead
bullet, although the hall with a lead
tip could also produce this result. Re
garding powder stains, smokeless or
otherwise, nothing of great value is to
be gained when the shooting occurs
at a distance greater than twelve or
fifteen feet. At a recent trial, snys
the Baltimore American, a doctor
stated that from powder marks on
the face be Judged that the shot bad
lieen fired at a distance of not more
than three feet, which conclusion Was
later backed up by the assertion made
on the stand by the prisoner himself.
E x p e c t a tio n a n d R e a liz a tio n .
Olden—You're cultivating rather ex
travagant tastes.
Youngman—Oh. well, when I get a
start in the world I expect to have all
the money I want.
Olden—Well, at that rate, you'll
want all the money yon expect to
have.—Philadelphia Press.
I n d ir e c t A n .w e r .
Borem—Do you believe that suicide
is a sin?
Miss Caustic—Well. In yonr case I
think it would he permissible.
Spinsters know what a miss spent
life la
Health
“ For 25 years I have never
missed taking Ayer's Sarsaparilla
every spring.
It cleanses my
blood, makes me feel strong, and
does me good in every way.” —
John P. Hodnette, Brooklyn, N.Y.
Pure and rich blood
carries new life to every
part of the body. You
are invigorated, refreshed.
You feel anxious to be
active. You becomestrong,
steady,courageous. That’s
what Ayer’s Sarsaparilla
will do for you.
SI.N a boltl«.
All dr.ffl.t*.
Tear up photograph of the Faith
less Creature. Figure up how much
she was coating you any way. Burn
up her love letters. Reflect upon her
numerous faults, including an always
evident* lack of good judgment. If
everything else fails why just forget
J her!—Syracuse Herald.
fen Minutes Late.
Bill—If you exercise for ten minutes
! every morning when you get up, do
I you know what it will do to you?
Jill—Sure; make me late for break-
j fast.—Yonkers Statesman.
|
“ T he K te .u , R oot K itch en K in d " o l s tov e.
tuske no .m o k e , sm ell, soot, sskes or excessive
. heat. A lw ays look lor trade m ark.
RBIPKSON MACHINERY CO.
Successors to John Poole.
Foot o f M orrison street, Portland, Oregon.
South Head Steel Plow s, 14 in..N o.
$'1.40;
South Hend c h ille d Plow s, 14 in. loA, |7.70;
Ikiuole Shovel C ultivators, f l.» » ; N ewton w a g
on gear, com plete, all c lip p ed , w id e tra«-k,
ItM.ui); top buggies, Jackson side springs, reg
ular $86.00, now $5^.50.
♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ ♦ ♦ ♦♦♦♦♦ M f
Y ou can largely increase the yield o f
you r c r o p by using ou r special fe rtiliz
ers. W rite for prices.
The Real Thing.
He— Did you ever see anything at
so-called bargain sales that was really
| cheap?
She—Yes; the look on a man’s face
who accompanied his wife to one of
them.—Cincinnati Enquirer.
■ For forty year’s P i s o 's Cure foT Con
sumption has' cured coughs ami colds. At
druggists. Price 25 cents.
Aik your doctor what he think» of Ayer's
8>tr»>tpartlla. He know» h II about this grand
old family metiiciue. Follow his advice and
we will be aatUflpri.
J. c. A t e r Co.. Lowell. Mass.
33
1 PEI! CENT OFF
3
On
all
Packet Seeds
For orders of $1.00 or more
^
(T his does n ot in c lu d e grass seeds or
g a rd en seed s iu q u a n tity .)
If in tha m arket w rite for special uet
prices.
:
MANN, the SEEDMAN.
Worst Yet.
Old Boarder—That’s a queer looking * 188 Front Street. P o r t I d m l , O r
butter dish, Mrs. Hasher.
Mrs. Hasher— Yes, and I’m awfully ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦A«
proud of it. too. It has been In our
You can get interest
family for more than a hundred years.
The Charitable Sex.
on you r surplus m o n
Old Bachelor—Indeed! Sort of heir
He—What an exceptionally good
ey from us and still
looms. as it were?
Lave it assa e as if you
complexion Mrs. Fortyodd has!
had secreted it In the
She— Yes; its too good to be true.
grou n d. Y ou can draw
—Cincinnati Enquirer.
you r m on ey w ith in
ABSOLUTE
CLEANLINESS AND GODLINESS.
Whatever You Do, Wise Brothers Advise
Good Teeth.
“ Cleanliness is akin to Godliness,"
is a quotation from the greatest bonk
known to man, and it is as widely
quoted as any saying ever used.
The
reason is found in the impressive truth
G en u in e
of the assertion.
At the present time when this conn-
try is passing through an unprecedented
period of prosperity, more and more
attention is paid to the refinements of
civilization every day. if a man, or
particularly a woman, is slovenly now
in dress or personal care, they are im
mediately noticed aud severely criti
M ust Bear Signature of
cised.
It is not hard as a rule to gain an in
come beyond immediate wants, and the
majority ol people in the United States
are accumulating a surplus.
The peo
See Fac-SImlU Wrapper Pilaw.
ple us a whole are better dressed and
better groomed titan they were twenty T f t r j em ail and a s easy
years ago.
Even the luxuries of fash
to U k C M sa g v .
ionable society are becoming the ne
FOR HEADACHE»
cessities of the masses.
FOR O lili NESS.
This is tne result of a great commer
cial age with all its benefits.
Nothing is more conspicuous than a
FOR TORPID LIV ER .
person’ s teeth.
If they are good and
FOR C0N STIPA TI0R .
white and clean then we are pleased,
FOR SALLOW S U R .
[f they are discolored or missing then
FOR YHECOM PLEXIOR
we are repulsed.
The tremendous
a MUST WAV» ItfNATUWI.
J
biassing to humanity conferred by ad
vanced methods of deg.al surgery is
beet illustrated by such an office as
CURE SICK HEADACHE.
that of the celebrated Wise Brothers, in
the Failing building, Portland, Oregon.
Didn’t Know What to Do.
Here teeth are filled or extracted abso
"Yes," said the fashionable mother.
lutely without pain- Yon ran be sup
‘T was dreadfully worried yesterday."
plied with an entire new set of teeth at
“ How was that?”
a very moderate coat.
There is no
“Why, the nurse went out and left
more trouble shout getting your teeth me alone with the baby for nearly two
put in perfect order here than you have hours."—Chicago Post.
at a restaurant in getting your dinner.
And That Ended Nora.
The offices are a model for anybody in
Mrs. Unfait—Now. Nora, be very
point of daintiness and cleanliness.
last it be strenuously urged that, if careful of this cut glasB punch bowl,
you want to get a.ong in the world and i Ii cost a mint of money.
Nora— Indade, mum! Well, it’s rale
be respected and desired by your ac
tough. Sure an’ I drapped it three
quaintances, have your teeth in good j times already an’ niver fazed it.
condition. There is no excuse for any
one to delay when there are such per
A Russian Banknote.
fect places as the establishment of
The 100 ruble note of Russia Is
’Wise Brothers at hand.
barred from top to bottom with all the
The cost is slight. The pain is noth- colors of the rainbow, blended as
when shown through a prism. In the
i n g . _________________
center in bold relief stands a large,
The Tooihqrush.
finely executed vignette of the Em
Soak a new toothbrush for ten min press Catherine I. This is in black.
utes in cold water and thoroughly dry The other engraving is not at all in
it before using, for then the bristles tricate or elaborate, but is well done
will be less likely to come out than if in dark and light brown and black
inks.
this precaution were omitted.
SECURITY.
LIT MONEY
EARN
MONEY.
terest any day. It w ill
pay you to investigate
this p ropoM l. W rite
for particulars.
No
m atter how little, or
how in ueh.id le m on ey
you have, it sh ou ld
earn you som eth in g,
aud safely.
lnvest-
merits made, M onev loan ed on im p rov ed city
terest-bearing
securities
inert?
g secu
rities
or farm p roM
rtv . In terest-bearin
b ou __
g h t am i sold.
la urge
r g e list o of f agricultu
ag ricu ltu ra " l
a n d 'tim l er lands for sale. W rite us today.
OREGON & PHILADELPHIA S E C U R ITIE S CO.
McKay Building, Portland, Oregon.
Carter's
Little Liver Pills.
Alcohol
Opium,
Tobacco
Using a
Wiitc for
I llustrated
C i r c u l a r a
*
m t ~ -
—
IT« st a n oN rson cirr *5
- flsMLAjrn. Qaz
Hicphooe Mnin 591-
FOR BILIOUSHESt.
Promotes Di^eslionJCheerfuT-
ness and Rest Contains neither
Opium,Morphine nor Mineral.
t
N
a r c o t ic
The Doutrlas secret pro- 1 _______ _
cem of ta a u in ? the bottom soles produce« a b so
lutely pure leather ; more flexible and w ill w saz
*05 F °r than any other tnnnr ge in the world.
The sales have more than doubled the past ftmx
ysaxs. w hich proves it» superiority. W h y not
give W . I». Douglas shoos a trial and sa^e m oney.
N o t i c e I n r r t 'u i e (V*9t Males:
In llu » ln e « s : \ 1102 Stile»: 1 6 , 0 ) 1 4 , 8 4 0 , 0 0
A gain of
H C O ,4 /»«.T O in Four Years.
W . L . D O U G L A S * 4 .0 0 G I L T E D G E L I N E ,
W o r t h 8 6 .0 0 C o m p a r e d w ith O t h e r M a k e s .
The beet Imported uni American leathera. Hey I' m
Patent Calf. Enamel. B i* Calf, Calf. Vlcl Kid, Corom
Colt, and National Kangaroo. Fast Color Eyelet».
Caution • Th* genuine have W . L. DOUOLA*
UaUIIUll a name and price stumped on bott —
Shoe» by mail, 25c. extra. Hint. Catalog free.
W > L . O O l U L A N . U U O C K T O K . M.
3
O. 18-1003.
T Y .H E N w ritin g to a d v e r tis e r s p le a s e
If
m e n tio n th is pa per.
Tho K ind Yon Have Always Bought, and which has been
In uso for over 3 0 years, has borne tho signature o f
und lias been mado under his per
sonal supervision sinco its Infancy.
Allow no one todecclvo yon in this.
A ll Counterfeits, Imitations aud “ Just-ns-good** are but
Experiments that trifle with and endanger the health o f
InfiMits and Children—Kxpcrlenco against experim ent.
ÁSégelable Preparation for A s
similating ihcFoodandRegula-
ting (lie Stomachs and Bowels of
N o
mmnufuaturar in tha world.
$25,000 REW ARD
will be paid to anyone who
can dlaprovo this statement.
Because W. L. Douglas
lathe largest
irgen manufacturer
he can buy cheaper and
produce his shoes at a
lower cost than other con-
ceras, which enables him
to sell shoes for §3.60 and
$3.00 equal in every
way to those sold else
where for $4 and $5.00.
What is CASTORIA
(W io ria Is a harmless substitute for Castor OU, Pare
goric, Props and Soothing Syrups. I t U Pleasant. ID
contains neither Opium, Morphine nor other Narcotlo
substance. It* ago Is Its guarantee. I t destroy* W orm s
and allays Feverishness. It cures Dtarrhaoa and W ind
Colic. It relieves Teething Troubles, cures Constipation,
and Flatulency. It assimilates tho Food, regulate* the
Stomach and Bowels, giving healthy and natural sleep.
The Children*» Panacea—The Mother’s Friend.
.
tOmrrtfOU O-SAMITLPrramfr
/\wr*m - W -
dbtSm
A perfect Remedy forCtìflSfipa
Ron, Sour Stomach.Diarrhoea
Worms Convulsions .Fewpsh-
•ness and L o s s OF SLEEP.
G E N U IN E
CASTORIA
Bears
th o
A LW A YS
S ig n a t u r e o f
Facsimile Signature of
G in t/ p fiG L *
N EW YORK.
-41$» fi i onl l i N o ld *
I'jD llY tS -IjC llH S
EXACT COPY Or WRAPPER.
The Kind Yon Have Always Bought
9
In Uso For Over 3 0 Years.