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About Bohemia nugget. (Cottage Grove, Or.) 1899-1907 | View Entire Issue (Nov. 2, 1904)
Clni'liimill 1'ont. DAYS COME AND QO. Igir) mil mill Doners fade, I n m nmir ami go; Now U nwrrl miininer laid luw in her lenfy k'lmle. liw llko it fragrant innl.l, Iiw, Inn', nil, low. Tears full and ejelids Hclit,, Heart orcrlloiv; Hero fur our dejd lore's sake I-t iw our farewell nuke Will li again awake? All, 110, iiu, no. Winds lgh nml klM nre gray, Days mine nml K: Wild bird are ikiwn nwy. Where are Ilia bloom of May? Distil, dead, this many n tiny, Umlrr the unow. IJH nldli ami cheek ate pair, llcnrtu overUWi Will not some Mine or tale, Kl. or Montr (rnlt, , Willi our iImi! love arall? All, no, no, no. Vnturjr. frplIUVM, linvo to go liouae-liunt-Iiib, now, nml tlmt'it nil there ti to It," anhl Mr. Klynn. ilecldcil ly. na alio oponeil tho now lodger' diHir. mid prepared to aweep the room. 'I'lie new lodger, n worn youni; wom an, luul pnaned nwny four dnya mtD, nml had left a tinby girl of four yeara, but, uulinpiilly, no money with which to care for It. It wna thin fnct Hint railed forth romiirk limited above from tall, Btcm Mra. riynn. Dolly. I ha lodger'a llttlo girl, wna kneeling on a broken chnlr gazing wlat fully out of the iluaty window. Hpot. her dog, and only companion, waa curled up on the floor asleep. "Vea, they'll hnvn to go liouao-hunt-lug for aure," repented Mr, c'lynn. "I havpn't nothln" to keep tho dog on, intUh le the child." Dolly lookwl up, hearing tho wortK "Come, run out with your dog whllo I awcop," anld the landlady, rpenklng to the child, who allppod to the Hour. "You can't go Into the kitchen Valine Mary'a wiiahln' nml alie'll bile your head olT, like na not, nr.d you can't go Into the parlor with that thero dog. Hit youmelf down on the atalra 'till I'm through. Hun, now." Dolly trudged patiently down tho narrow winding atalra, and Hpot pat tered boHldo her. "Iiok out for tho torn place In the carpet, Dolly," alio murmured to her Hclf, repenting tho phraao ao often on inother'H Him. Ah ahe pnuaed on the second land ing n long mirror cnught her eyea through tho half-open uoor, nun, on terlng the room, alio went close to the gin an. "You a'poae wo look Rood 'nougli to to houae-huutlir, Hpot 7" sue hhkimi, nr- ter surveying the chubby llttlo llguro for n few moment, "lolt Hpoao wo do? Miiinnm dreased me up when we turned here. Hpot. but i can t ureaa you up Valine you'ro only n dog. Hut wo'll imi bouse-liuntln' Just tho same." The two llltlo friend continued their alow Journey down stnlra, nnd. to Dol ly's great delight tho front door wna open. Mary stood on tho otcpa with her alcove rolled up, talking to tho postman. 'T'r'iiP "ho won't seo us," miir mured tho llttlo girl, doubtfully. " 'Cnuso l'vo got to go." Mnry did not pay nny attention to the child and dog ns they slipped past her down to tho sidewalk, but n tlioy were nboiit to turn up the street, tho postman put out n long nrm nnd caught Do v. "Where nro you goln, nilau?" ho naked, laughing. ho struggled to free herself. "You'ro too llttlo to go iin lown alone." "Dolly Madison, Just you tnko that dog and trot Into tho house, where you belong." cried tuo exnsperiiieu servnui, "If you don't move iiulelt, liowy slip nilded threatening, n tho postman set tho child on tho lower step. ' Hut lhekiunll carrier showed signs of rnnllnulnir tho conversation, nnd when Dolly pleaded eagerly to bo allowed to go Into t)io"!trcct, nnd Mary caught tho naino of hor inwrcss, buo roicuieu, wiving carelessly: "Oh! Mrs. riynn enld you could? Thon go along, for coodnoBS snkol' Dolly darted eagerly to tho sldowalk ngnln, followed by Spot, and together they hurried up tho short trcot Into n. inoro rcspoclablo, peopled one. An they turned Into (ho crowd, Dolly breathed moro frooly, Bho wni half nfrnld that Mary would chaugo her mind about I DOlirSlHHW I lid HAZING SEASON HAS OPENED. granting thl unusual freedom, anil send Unit nivful ponlinnii nfter her. On nml on they went, past groat iliiorit where throng of people were entering "nil leaving, nml past dloru window full of toy wIiIpIi, iiihiUict tiny, would have delighted Iut. No one liottccil tlit III (lit runaway, or, If they Mill, It wna only In KtnllP, nml remark limv bright nml cnriieal the brown eyea were, nr how tin low wliltp Nock luul nlliii'il down Ml ii h to lip nlmost In visible for Mr. MihIIboii drewied Iht linliy nil wpII ii h aim could nfforil. even neglecting Iht own lire In ilo no. Dolly took no Interest In tho gny throngs of people Hint alio ikhpi1. She liail mi Indistinct liU-ii of wlmt alio winded to tin, nml alio ki'it on. Hoon Hip street grew lea noisy, nml broader, thero wiih mi occasional tree, nml thf aldewnlks wcro smoother. House took the ilnro of atoroa, nml llio clillil began to realize liow tlrptl alio wna. llor llttlo fppt won' burn Inc. anil seemed very hard to lift, nml alio sighed, n aoft baby sigh. Then hor face lit up. "Now we'll look for tho nicest, pret tiest house, Spot," alio until eagerly, "then wo'll rlnK tho lioll unil thoy'll any 'coiiip In." Tlmt'a wlmt iimiiinm illil." In n well-furnished library, n gentle- man waa lying on n aora, ono iooi, which waa tightly bandaged, mi n pil low. The doctor, who hnd Just re moved hla hand from the bandage, rose to go. "It's too bad, old man, ho anld. It'a n bad sprain, nnd will tnko some lime to cure. It was the first time you'd been out alnco Kthcl'a death. wan t It? Tho patient nodded nnd cleared hla throat nt the mention of his tl yenr-old girl, who hnd died two weeks before. Her mother waa dead, also, ana tie wna alone. Ill kind, genial nature had changed since tho death of his child. Tho doctor took his leave, and Mr. Abbott was left to himself. He picked up a Iwok, tried to rend, threw It down, nnd picked up n magazine. Hut that soon followed the book, mid ho rang the bell Impatiently. (let me n cigar, will you, Thomas?" hp said to an old servant. Thomas did ns ho was told, casting a pitying look nt his young master. 'It's too bad, sir, lie said. 'It's beastly slow," grumbled Mr. Abbott, with n little kick nt his wound ed foot. "Thomas. If n. y one calls, show lilm In." Half an hour later the doorbell rang, and ns Thoinn went nlong tho ball, Mr. Abbott pulled the iifghan moro smoothly over hi foot, saying half aloud: Thank heaven, I need not spend tho nflernoon alone." Ho looked expectantly towards tho door n Thoinn pushed It open, say ing, "A young lady to seo you, sir, unit to his surprise, n child, hntless, and with faltering step entered the room. "Thoinns, what do you mean by this?" ho asked sharply. "If you call this a Joke It Is a very poor one." Ho was hurt, and n sharp pang went through hi heart. Thoso brown eyes brought his lUhel hack to lilm. What right bad another child with brown eyes? nnd what Thomas, n very red Thomas, was nbout to explain, when tho child spoko: "I camo house-huntln'," she snld simply, but " And n llttlo sob rose In her throat "If you'ro cross, I'll go nwoy." Mr. Abbott looked at her In somo surprise. "Who nro you, child?" ho asked. Hut Instead of answering, tho tired llltlo crenturo suddenly covered her face with her hands nnd burst Into tears. "Como here," snld tho lnvnlld, kind ly, nnd ho put out his hand and caught her dross. "Who nro you, and vhy did you come houso-huntlng? Won't you tell me nil nbout It?" Thomn quietly withdrew mid closed tho door, hut ns ho moved to and fro In tho next room, ho could hear the murmuring of tho llttlo girl's voice, nnd then his master', onco more kind nnd tender, as ho comforted tho tired child. ' rresently tho bell tinkled again, nnd Thomn oponcd tho door Into tho li brary to bo mot with tho words: ' ''Hushl She's nil tired out, poor child. Can you lay her on tho louugo without waking hor, Thomas? Bho Is an orphan, poor llttlo mlto," Thomn lifted tho sloeplng; child from the floor nnd laid" her on tho loungo. "Bho has n look llko Ethel," mur mured Mr. Abbott, softly. Tho houso which Dolly, when a lit' tlo girl of four yenrB, selected a "tho nicest, prettiest house," has been her homo ever since. Wavcrloy, i NEEDLE AND 8POOL OF THREAD. The lluala Upon Which I'rnnk TunnlM lliilll u Fortune. When Krn nk Pnrmelcp. founder of a f'hleago trausHrtntlon line nnd a man of iniieh wealth, died 111 Chicago the other d u y there wiih round In tho pocket of tho coat which he had last uorn thread and n needle. Ho had car r I oil them o throughout h I long and success ful career and they nero burled with him. To them ho .. .. - ,!... 1 I.I MUM! i-aiiuixeE. 0'ieo nutiuuini n, ,, nml li never wearied of tell lug the story of hi "noodle und thread capital." Kcvcnty-slx years ago, when I'armc lee was 12 yeara old and living with hi mircnta at Hyroii, N. Y.. he decided to leave homo. Tho family wa poor ami the boy conaldcrod himself old enough to make his own llveltnoou III parents granted their consent re luctantly, and the ton arranged for n "Job" III a atago coach olllcc at Krle. I'n. Ho wa not conccrneu ns 10 in manner In which he wns to reach that point because hi future employer were willing to transport him most of the wny and he could walk If ho had to. The day of hi departure his moth er bade lilm good-by iu this fashion: "Franklin, I wish your father was able to give you a little mouey to Btnrt on, but you know be hasn't got It. Now then, rrniiklln, your mother, who thinks good deal more of you than you ever Imagined, I Koinn to glvo you n bit of advice and something else with it, and she want you to treasure both of them. "Above all things I want you to tako a great deal of pride In yourself and Just mako up your mind that you are going to be successful. And you must nlwnya keep neat arid clean and keep your clothe In good repair and don't let the button como off or else you won't respect yourself. Now then, I'm going to give you a reminder." Tho mother held out her hand and young l'nrineleo reached for tho "ro inliuler." It wn a spool of black thread with a needlo stuck through It crosswise. The boy kissed his mother nnd put the thrend nnd needle In his carpet bag. Then he stnrted out for Hrlo. Ho afterword went to work on the lakes, saved money, started a street car line In Chicago and later engaged In the cxpr.es business. Jan In Amorlonn Army. It may not bo generally known that the United Stntes nrmy of tho future will Include n command of .lapnneio soldiers, but this Is a fuel. They will not como from tho armies which nre lighting In tho far cast, but will bo enrolled from our Jnpaneso citizen In tho Sandwich Island. It Is need less to sny that n very largo lmrtlon of the population of tho Islands, nnd especially of Honolulu, ,1s composed of this nation. Ttiey nro rounti among tho banker, merchant nud profea slonnl men nnd nro Included among tho wealthiest resilient or tno city. One of tho principal schools of Hono. lulu Is nt tended exclusively by Japa nese children and hero ha been en rolled n comtnnud of cadets which I to bo mustered Into the United State mlllttn ns soon as Its members aro old enough. It Is drilled by a former Japanese nrmy olllcer and although organized but n few year ago this battalion ha already attained high stnndard of elllcleney. It Is frequent ly seen on pnrado In Honolulu nml attract much attention. It Vinu III' Itlnok llnnd. "Charley hnd n dreadful tlmo last night," said young Mr. Torklns. "Ho snys ho wns n victim of tho 'Illnck Hand.' " "You don't say so!" exclaimed tho caller. "Yes. Ho camo homo without a cent. I don't quite understand tho par tlculnrs n ho explained them. Hut they pulled n deadly weapon on lilm that la known ns n club Hush." Wash ington Star. Ill Vo.l I Ion. Mlfklns What position does young Sloboy play on tho village football team quarter-back, half-back, or full back? Hlfkln Tho only tlmo I ever snw him In n gnmo bo was the draw back. More Appropriate. Ii Montt Harker U always brag glng. Ho say In Hoston oven tho bath house aro built of brownstone, Ia Moyno Hrownstone? Seems to me they should bo built of soapttono, GOOD Shorty tofies A Hcolcli gamekeeper, a great llatlit n one of Hip klrka, wna naked tho dif ference between tho Krco nml tho Unit ed I-ree eliuclica. "(live ine tho nctll nl illffereneo In n almple form," tho In quirer reiiiealil, nftcr n Ionic lecture from the gamekeeper. "eii, air, - miu John, "If you wniil It plainly, It la thin: II nil bo anveu mm im-y n mi uo dimmed." "On n very hot day, recently, two ciillnd L-emuieli' were chaltlnc outsldo my window," said Alex. H. Thwentt, of the Southern Hallway; "one was a bright mulatto, tho other blacker than stove-polish. 'How yo' feel, Abo?' ask ed tho mulatto. 'Kind o' warm, Jake,' answered tho darker chap: 'how' yo'- so'f ' 'Hlght peart, thank you,' saia Iho mulatto to hi cboiiy-lmod friend; hut snr. Abe. yo' shore do hold yo' color fust rate dl hot wentherl' " It I not often that tho stage aspi rant manages to reach tne omcc or Wells Hnwks, who Is the right-liana man of that Napoleon of theatrlcnl managers, Cliarle Trohman. Of course. It wa n woman who did the trick, tho other day. She apparently rented a fair Impression, for the gen erally busy Mr. Hawkes asked her: "Aro you married or unmarrieuc as ho prepared to book her application. "Unmarried four times!" was the re ply that startled the placid manngsr. Justice David J. Hrewcr, of the Hu pretno Court of the United States, said Hint tho best way to reach the young men Is to send the young women after (hem; that ever since the days of Moth er Eve they hail been n ixiteut factor In catching tho elusive man, nnd that they are a strong now as they cvor were. Ilo told the story of the re ligion man who took bis Hlhlo In ono hand and his little son by the other, nnd went for n walk and initructlon. They enmo upon a bevy of youn girls playing In tho forest, nnd tho boy ask ed what they were. "Geeec, .my son, geese." replied the father. "Oh. catch mo one, father; catch me one!" cried tho boy. Admiral Dewey' fnvorHe story Is of nn Amerlcnn nrmy olllcer who. when in Culm, whs extremely dlssatlMled with tlie cooking. Ho Insisted that tho Cubans put sugar into everything they cooked. At last he nnnounced that he would cat nothing but boiled cera "They can't aujar them." he declared. So he ordered them next Hut. before he appeared at the table, another officer had tilled the salt cruet with sugar. " kicker" appeared, hla eRK were brought to him. He opened tnem wuu a gloomy complacejicy, and sprinkled over them plenty of the doctored salt. At the Drst mouthful ne lurncu pur ple. "Sugared! Sugared: ne exi-iaiui- cd, and rusuod rrom inu iuuic. a vmini- man who was trying for the sheepskin In Missouri, and who had made n poor showing, was asked by Senator Vest, one of tils examiners. If he would like to be questioned fur ther. "I regret to Bay." remarked Mr. Vest, "that you have failed to come up to the maiA In the branches of law iikii which we have examined you. Hut, he added, in a mosv nuu'j !".. wo will question you runner, it you so desire." "Well, Bir," responoeu m applicant, "I would suggest, if you please, that I be questioned on tho stntutes." At this Mr. Vest smiled, sadly. "My dear young man." added he. "I do not doubt that you're up on the statutes; but I do doubt that you will succeed In the law. fcuppose ou should have the utmost familiarity with tho stntutes, what's to prevent the leglhlaturo from repealing all you know'" NAVAL CADET VEGETARIAN. Midshipman from Ohio W Carrjlnu Out Tills luca. i.'nr tho first time In the history of the naval academy at Annapolis n vegetarian has been admitted as a midshipman. His name Is Charles W. Adair, and ho halls from Xenla, Ohio, say the Philadelphia North American. Tho question Hint now confront the young mnn, and one that will b close ly considered uy me auiuonucu, i whether or not he will be able to go through the course of four years and remain steadfast to his principle. Hlght nt the start It may bo said that It 1 a thousand to one ho cannot. While Undo Sam Is willing to pay vounc ineu to aid In nn Investigation of pure, or rather Impure, foods, to food them on borax and to watch them fade away upon a diet of cold storage food, ho Is not Inclined to mice nny chances with the young fellows who nre to be bis mllltnry ana navai otn ccrs. Medical men who have studied the question of diet for tho cadet huvo fixed upon certain classos of foods as being good for them, from ootn a puys teal nnd mental point of view. The diet contains Items of flesh and fowl nnd fish. Of course, thero aro vegeta bles In plenty, but tho question of whether the variety Is sulllclent for the now middy tq mako tho needful ration without eating meat I one not dltHcult to answer In tho negative. Tho physical examination passed by Midshipman Adair was most oxeollont. "I found lilm," said Director Jiogart, "to bo a nonnnlly built youth. He Is within n few months of "0 yours of ngo. Ilo is live leei leu mm iiircu' qunrter Inches tall nnd U8.8 pounds In weight. His strength u normal, n llt tlo better than tho average. "Llko nil midshipmen, Adair has cer tain minor defects, and for theso spe cial exercises aro proscribed," tho doc tor wont on. "Ho nsplrc to play on tho footbnll team nnd ho seem to pos ses tho physique to mako n valuahlo momber. Hut tho work is tiara hero, If the vogotablo diet Is not Bufllctont to keen him lu absolutely normal health, wo shall Insist upon his chang ing It We must have sound young men, and no fads Bhalt be permitted to stand in tho wny. "For the prescut, however, I see no reason for Interference. I think It a vrU-establlshed fact that' Americans pnt too much went, nnywny. Tlicy ilo not ncwl nil the incut tlicy bolt. A certain amount of albuutltiol nro re ulrcil, but tlicy dj not!-; necessarily llnvp to oo me ffdin m'ntH.1 "Moat vegetarian pnt "butler nml drink milk, nml get wlmt tlicy neeil In that wny. I umlcratnml ttint Ailalr In not nt nil 'criinky,' nml feci certain ' (tint If lie do Wit get enough vegeta ble to keep lilm III good physical trim wo ahull not hnvii iiiiipIi troublo In In- i iluolng lilm to inoillfy hi lde. Wo l will not inakn on exception In hi ' cae." I Hp I n finely built, handsome young fellow. Hla checka ifro red, hla eyea ui,, m rumriHretl with mine of tho tlt,r tnlildlra In tho Kymnaalum lie wein n giant lll snouidpra nre broad, his hand largo and linn, and tho poise of the whole Imdy Indicates that he I In perfert health. Ho discarded meat about four year ago, and believes that hla atrength and general condition nre better without It. Ho disclaim any pet thporle on the aubject, although be ways be ha found beans and peas the moH strengthen ing. Since arriving at tho academy, ho ha used a little butter on hi bread, and drjnks plenty of milk. "Hut," he adds, "I shall not starve for the sake of carrying out my theories as to diet. I am not so unreasonable as that," THEOHIE8 ABOUT THE SUN. Mo Immediate Danicer that It Will Hum Itaeirout. The current theorje concerning tho sun and the planet arc that the sun was once vastly hotter than It is now, and that for n long period It has been slowly but steadily cooling. This doc trine Is built on the notion that the sun Is a mass of fire In progress of In tens and fierce combustion, and that. like any other fire, unlots It fuel Is replenished, It must burn out ond be come extinguished. Some astronomers teach that the sun 1 supplied with fuel by vast quantities of comet and meteor that aro shoveled Into It by some process of nature, but other as tronomer like Sir Itoberf Hall reject the possibility of any such systematic supply of fuel, and they believe that the sun as It burns out shrinks In size nt the rate of 220 feet of Its diameter !n a year. A the mas of the suu 1 something like 8S0.WX) mlle-i to diam ctcr, It Is calculated ttlll to last for a irood long time, but there Is something extremely melancholy and saddening In the Idea that our grand luminary will one day burn out with n spas modic gleam and a whiff of lll-imell. Ing smoke like the snuff of a candle. It 1 with great satisfaction that we are allowed to believe In the possibil ity that tli sun Is made of radium, nnd that It can continue to give off heat nnd light for on lnconceivnblo lapse of age without being In the least diminished either In size or ca pacity to warm and Illuminate u. The ilea that It is not losing 220 feet of It diameter yearly is particularly consol ing. There Is another suggestion which would enable our solar system to con- t'nue Its operations without elth suffering an Instantaneous connagra Uon or being consuired by slow com bustlon, and this Is that the sun and the various bodies which revolve around It cont!tute cnelectrtc dyna mo and an Incandesceut'lamp on such o scale as could be designed and cre ated by combined omniscience and omnipotence, to go on It beneficent course forever. Such a notion mcts ouly the contempt of science, which In sists upon the existence of actual fire In the sun, that must sooner or later burn Itself out to complete extin guishment Until, however, astrono mer like Prof. Langley shall make a flying machine without balloon at tachment that will enable human be ings to fly, their vagnrle concerning the playlng-out of the sun may well bp 'neglected by all except full-fledged scientist. New Orleans Picayune. MANNERS OF CHILDREN. Neglected Youngster Are a Menace to the Communlt-r. Every child should bo taught nt home to treat with respect Its teach ers and elder. If each mother would send forth her children thu fortified, the public school teachers would have a less Irk some task, for good manners are cer tainly lufectlous. Every bad-mannered or neglected child lu the community la a menace to every other child In the community, a dUgrace to parent or guardian and a stumbling block to the public school teacher. Each nation has Its own peculiar customs for Its children, and the small folk must abide by the teachings of tho elders. I think the young Ameri cans can hold their own with the young people of any nation, remember ing, of course, that one country mny have a preter way of displaying the same courtesy than iinother. Tho Jnpaneso children, for Instance, on en tering the dlnlng-rooin for their morn ing meal, make n pretty, low bow, nl most touching the floor, to their par ents, and say a soft sweet "Qood- morning," while the Amerlcnn child will rush to Its parents' arms with n hug and a kls. Atone..of the bestrJoardlnB schools In New York, where all the teachers wero gentlewomen, the pupils were taught to say "Yes, mother," or "No, father," or "What Is It father?" or "Yes. Mr. Smith," etc. "Yos" and "No" only would not ho tolerated. If talking to n person of great distinc tion, a pupil must give the full name ortltle, ns "Ye, Prnfeisor Smith, what Is It?" or "Professor Smith, I did not hear you." An abrupt "What?" wns considered coarse, ond tho culprit wn punished. You can neither teach nor expect a very small child to repeat the name of tho people with whom (t comes In contact dally, but It can bo taught to say "Yos, mothor or father," nnd to speak with a low, gentlo voice. It Is uot so much tho words "what" and "yes" nnd "no," ns tho wny In which they ore said. The tone Is ruder than tho word very often, and sometime a look without any word offeuda or pleases. After the honeymoon marriage be gins to resolve Itself Into a guesslng- contcst. Most town folks admire their coun try relative for vUltln purposes only. why Women Fail as Wives j f BY CLIZADCTII M. GILMER comes to a woman by Inspiration, and not through preparation, Whon tho average girl marries she doe not even know how to make a man physically comfortable. Nobody can be sentimental on an empty stomach, and bad cooking will kill the tenderest affection in tlmo. Ive Is choked to death on tough steak as well as slain by unfaithfulness, nnd many a young hus band' Illusion about his bride havo been drowned In watery soup. All of this seems very material and sordid to a woman, but It Is very Important, nevertheless. When n mnn marries, ho marries for a home. Out In tho world to-day he ha all that he can endure, nnd when night come It find him with wrecked nerves, nnd a spent body that long for some quiet place where he can bo at peace and rest It Is the woman's part of the marriage partnership to supply this, and unless she doc he liaa defaulted on her contract nnd she deserves to be posted a an lmposter who ha got goods on false pretense. If every girl who married were a good free-hand cook, fewer wive would have to go into liquidation In love. Lack of companlonablcno Is another reason why so many women fall as wive. There Is not one woman In a thousand who know how to chum with her husband, and enter Into the things be want to do. Tho oUier nine hundred and nlnoty-nlne seem to think that matrimony 1 n reformatory, n'nd that it 1 their sacred duty to keep their husbands from enjoying them selves. The average wife never has such a self-righteous feeling u'i4t she Is doing her full duty by her husband as when she is Interfering with his pleas ure, or trying to change his habit. Then there are the children. Whatever degree of companionship did exist betwen husband and wife during the honeymoon generally get it quietus from the first baby. After the baby's arrival, the husband simply exist henceforth to supply baby want. The young mother dooan't dress, because baby pull at her ribbon and laces. She doesn't spend the evenings with her hmbnnd, because baby has to be rocked to sleep. Tho only topic of Interest to her Is sterilized baby-food, and she 1 relieved, and not sorry, when her husband take to going out of evenings to amuse himself, because In her desire to bo n good mother she has forgotten what a very poor wife she has become. Women do some queer figuring sometime, but they never make quite so big an error In their calculation a when they decide that a baby Is worth more than a husband. Women fall as wive because they lack appreciation. Wives complain Instead of giving thanks. They grumble because they haven't got automo biles, In place of being grateful that they have somebody to furnish their car-fare. They weep because they can't go to Europe, when they taught to bo beaming with Joy because tlicy have a home to stay In. Now, n man doesn't want his wife to get out a brass band and a torchlight procession to cele brate his virtues In supporting his family, but he doe like to feel that hi toll and his effort are appreciated, and that hi sacrifices are not mado in vain.' After a man has worked like a slave from morning until night year after year, for his board and clothes and that' about all the average man gets It must be pretty hard lines to feel that all the thanks he receives are whines and reproaches because he doesn't make more. Finally, lastly and mostly, women fall as wives because they are too lazy to keep the love they have won, and to make the man happy who Is devoting his life to making them comfortable. To be a good wife la not an easy task. It Is one of the most strenuous undertakings on earth. It requires labor and care and skill and tact and unselfishness, but that 1 tho kind of service a woman agrees to give when she gets married. If she doean't like the price, she can stay single. The dignified clUzen had Just finish ed telling his story to the grand Jury nnd, duly Impressed by his Importance a a cog In the machinery of the law, had started for the door. He was halt ed by n call from one of the grand Juror. "Mr. Hlnksl Just a moment!" Mr iiinkn stomied. slowlv retraced his steps nnd again took tho witness chair. "Mr. Hlnks," said the Inquiring Jur or, "didn't you say you live on me north side? r MA nlr." snld Sir. Hlnks. with the Importance which some north side people always assume. He looked nt bis Inquisitor, but the black beard tinged with gray of the grand Juror and the twinkling eyes behind the glasses told him nothing. 'Mr. Hlnks," went on tuo juror. "HONEST JOHN" MORLEY. Distinguished l'arllmeutarlan to Visit America. At Inst Andrew Carnegie has suc ceeded In getting his particular crony, John Morley, to come to America, auu the Hlght Hon. John Morley will be tvnHh cpetiie. Ho comes nearer than nny one else to being tho successor of his old friend, Ulaastone, ns En gland' most distinguished plain citi zens, partly becauso of hi great name as a man of letters, nnd partly bo- John uonusv m. r. ..o nr ii,,, iiohrht nnd general re moteness of the political pinnacle on which ho sits, looking down rather sadly on the squabbling ana muuuung that goes on below mm. Tf ia nni fn Mnrler'H rtrofound schol nrulilt, Ida rnro Intellectual KlftB. his i.rininni iitornrr achievements or his statesmanship that he owes tho unique position wtucu ne occupies in puuue esteem here. People may differ from II 15 first renson why women fall as wives I because marriage has never yet been OTteemod one of the learned professions, which only a highly qualified Individual 1 fitted to practice. On the contrary, It is held to be a kind of Jack-leg trade that any girl can pick up nt a mln tito' notice, nnd carry on successfully without the slight est previous knowledge or training. No girl would b conceited enough to think that she could pracUce medl clno or law or dentistry without devoting years to It study. She wouldn't even drtom of hiring out as a sten ographer without first learning how to mako pot-hooks, but she blithely and cocksurcly tackles the most dltllcult and complicated Job existing, that of being n wife, on the fallacious assumption that a knowlodgo of how to manage a man, and make hlra happy and comfortable. "didn't your father at one time keel a drug store on the north side?" "He did." replied Mr. Blnks, won dering what that had to do with hi testimony. "Now, Mr. Hlnk," pursued th grand Juror, "didn't you nt one time steal a number oi wine bottles from your father " "Certainly not sir!" shouted Mr. Hlnks, standing up Indignantly, while tho other twenty-two Jurors stared at the bearded member. "Yes. you did, Tom," exclaimed that mysterious person, leaving his seat In the row of Jurors and advancing; to Mr. Hlnks with extended hand, "be cause I helped you and I took 'cm around to the front and sold 'em again to the old man. Don't you know mo. you old fraud?" Then they bad a reunion and the grand Jury took a recess. Chicago Dally News. htm In matters of opinion the majori ty have generally done bo but politi cal friends and foes alike are all one In their belief In bis bedrock of hon esty of purpose. It is this which has won for him the familiar sobriquet of "Honest John" In the House of Com mons. Not even for the advantago of his party and for party ends many good men have done some shady things nnd found no difficulty in quieting; their consciences will John Morley stray by a hair's breadth from what be belloves to be the right course. Hefore entering Parliament Slorlcy wns a writer, having made his literary beginning on the Saturday Hevlew In London. Ha Unme, but No Hnakos. The American who happens Into Newfoundland will find Innumerable causes for Interest and surprise. The Interior of tho Island Is a wilderness) primitive and practically unexplored. A quaint slow, uncertain railway traverses tho heart of tho Island, but for COO miles of travel over mountains, through denso forest nnd by tho mar gins of salt water bay and estunrles not n town 1 to uo seen. Herd of. caribou, us tamo ns barnyard cattle. Btand staring nt the pnsslns train. From the bosom of hike and river trout nud salmon nro forover leaping. Ilrunt, geese, wild ducks, grouse and mnny wild birds that mlgrato hither lu the summer can bo found all over the Island, Hero they mnto and bieed, and tholr gosling nnd chicks make the woods nnd wnters vocal all summer long. Newfoundland, like Ireland, Is innocent of snakes or reptile. Where the Preacher Work. Church The average man like to sit Idly and seo somo other man do all the work. Gotham Why Is It, then, that more, men don't go to church? Yonkcru Statesman. ' Tho modern golden calf looks sus piciously llko a high-priced russet shoe,