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About Cottage Grove sentinel. (Cottage Grove, Or.) 1909-current | View Entire Issue (Feb. 7, 2018)
2A COTTAGE GROVE SENTINEL FEBRUARY 7, 2018 M y husband, Dave, and I have been married over 50 years, and I can honestly say we have a great marriage. But it didn’t start out that way. Like many people, I learned that it takes effort and a willingness to let God change us if we’re going to have a healthy marriage. One of the most important things we can do is examine our expectations. Having unrealistic expectations can sabotage a marriage before it ever really gets started. So many people enter marriage expecting their spouse to be something they are not. Or they have the unrealis- tic expectation that their marriage partner will be able to keep them happy all of the time. For starters, I think it’s important to realize the way you feel when you’re dating is different than how you’ll feel after you’ve been married for a while. In the beginning, everything is new and exciting, and emotions are running high. But a day will come when all of those emotions won’t necessarily be there, and that’s okay. For instance, just because I don’t melt into the carpet every time Dave walks into the room, it doesn’t mean I love him any less than before. In fact, I love him more. Our love is deeper because it’s based on years of experience and getting to know each other. We have a quality of relationship now that is so much greater than when we fi rst met. The key to building a healthy marriage to Dave has been a serious commitment to be as close to God as I can possibly be. Maturing spiritually in Christ has changed me in wonderful ways that have healed and restored my soul and fi lled me with His love. In Ephesians 3:17 (AMP), the apostle Paul prayed for the church in Ephesus, “that Christ may dwell in your hearts through your faith” and that they would be “[deeply] rooted and [securely] grounded in love.” Being changed by the love of God has given me the ability to love Dave the way I should love him, rather than expecting him to be everything I think he should be. It’s become a long-standing joke—especially for women—that we look at the person we’re going to marry and think, I can change them. Sadly, this is the way I viewed my husband during the early years of our marriage. Dave and I have completely opposite personalities. He’s naturally laid-back and easygoing, always looking at the bright side of things. I’m more of your typical “Type A” personality. I’m highly-motivat- ed but can also be too harsh and insensitive. Well, for years, I tried to get Dave to be more aggressive like me, especially when it came to stepping out into new things. He would inevitably say, “Joyce, you’re always out ahead of God.” And I would reply, “And you’re always 10 miles behind Him!” On one occasion, after I continued to discuss how passive he was, Dave fi nally got really upset and said, “Joyce, you better be glad I’m this way. Because if I wasn’t, you wouldn’t be doing what you’re doing.” I got the message loud and clear! The Lord used this experience to help show me the dangers of nit-picking Dave about things I perceive as weaknesses. Even if Dave does need to change in an area, God is truly the only One who can change him—my pestering will only make things worse and drive a wedge between us. I used to constantly pray for God to change Dave. Now, I pray more like this: “God, I would really like for Dave to change in this area, but maybe he’s not even the problem—maybe it’s my attitude. So, fi rst, I ask You to change anything in me that needs to be changed. If there’s something Dave needs to change, I pray that You will work in that area of his life. In the meantime, please help me to focus on all of the great things about my husband.” If you’re constantly trying to change your spouse, you end up fo- cusing on all of their weaknesses and things you don’t like. There is a great analogy about the power of “focus” that God revealed to me. He showed me that focus is like taking a Polaroid picture—whatev- er we focus on will DEVELOP in our lives. Dave is a great husband, and I honestly have no complaints. But if I began to focus and dwell on little things that annoy me from time to time, I would eventually see nothing else and actually make myself (and him) miserable. But when I magnify the good and focus on everything I really like about him, it produces feelings of gratitude, love and joy...and the “bad stuff” suddenly seems less important. I encourage you to take a moment right now and pray for your spouse. Commit your relationship to the Lord and ask God to help you focus on everything you like about them. No one is perfect, but when you choose to love your spouse for who they are, you open the door for God to bless your marriage in amazing ways. For more on this topic, order Joyce’s CD and DVD set Marriage. You can also contact us to receive our free magazine, Enjoying Ev- eryday Life, by calling (800) 727-9673 or visiting www.joycemey- er.org. Joyce Meyer is a New York Times bestselling author and founder of Joyce Meyer Ministries, Inc. She has authored more than 100 books, including Battlefi eld of the Mind and Unshakeable Trust: Find the Joy of Trusting God at All Times (Hachette). She hosts the Enjoying Everyday Life radio and TV programs, which air on hundreds of stations worldwide. For more information, visit www. joycemeyer.org. Please note: The views and opinions expressed throughout this publication and/or website are those of the respective authors and do not necessarily refl ect those of Joyce Meyer Ministries. IN MEMORIAM Donald Arnold 1949-2018 be held from 2:00 – 5:00 PM at The Cottage Bowl on Friday, February 9, 2018. Arrange- ments in the care of Smith Lund Mills Funeral Chapel, Cottage Grove, OR. Dennis Sexton 1950-2018 DEATH NOTICES D onald F. Arnold aka “The Don”, 68 of Cottage Grove, OR passed away on Jan- uary 7, 2018 from natural caus- es. He was born August 2, 1949 in San Diego, CA to Marvin F. and Margaret (Thomas) Arnold. Don married Elaine Richardson on November 10, 1970 in Las Vegas, NV. He served as a mil- itary police offi cer for the US Army and later worked for the railroad as a locomotive engi- neer for 30 years. Don enjoyed fi shing, camping, bowling, golf, black powder shooting and spending time with his family. He was entered into the honor- ary cat fi sherman’s hall of fame. Don is survived by his wife of 47 years, Elaine Arnold, Cot- tage Grove, OR; son, Frank and wife Joyce, CA; sons, Anthony, Johnny and wife Christy, Cot- tage Grove, OR; sister, Carol Mundy and husband John, CA; brother, Dan and wife Jan, CA; 6 grandsons and 1 granddaugh- ter. A Celebration of Life will business 20 years in CA. The he switched to his love of antique glass doing shows in California, Nevada and Washington. He has lived in Dorena, OR for the past 13 years. He is survived by wife Linda Sexton of 27 years, three daughters Adena LeMaster, Crystal Pacheco, of Carson City NV, Grace Russie, of Portland, one son Eric McDonel of Bakersfi eld, CA, six grandchildren and fi ve great- grandchildren. D ennis Sexton born in Ba- kersfi eld, CA May 30, 1950, passed in Bakersfi eld Jan. 8, 2018 Dennis worked in the furniture Brown — Esta Brown, 83, of Dorena, OR , died Jan. 31. No service is planned. Arrangements by Smith-Lund- Mills Funeral Chapel in Cottage Grove. Kemer — Victor Kemer, 83, of Cottage Grove, OR, died Jan. 27. No service is planned. Arrangements by Smith-Lund- Mills Funeral Chapel in Cottage Grove. Strickland — Thomas Lee Strickland, 71, of Cottage Grove, OR, died Jan. 6. No service is planned. Arrangements by Smith-Lund-Mills Funeral Chapel in Cottage Grove. Patricia Jean Woolley, 74 of Drain, OR passed away January 3, 2018. Arrangements by Smith-Lund-Mills Funeral Chapel, 123 S. 7th St., Cottage Grove, OR 97424. Matta — Richard Salvador Matta, 83, of Dorena, Or, died Jan. 3. Arrangements by Smith- Lund-Mills Funeral Chapel in Cottage Grove. Violette — Marion Louise Violette, 74, of Cottage Grove, OR , died Feb. 3. No service is planned. Arrangements by Smith-Lund-Mills Funeral Chapel in Cottage Grove. BIRTHS Dani and Brian Dunn of Cottage Grove welcomed a baby boy on Jan. 31 at PeaceHealth Sacred Heart Medical Center. Maria Guzman-Negrete and Hector Ramirez-Montez of Cottage Grove welcomed a baby girl on Jan. 31 at PeaceHealth Sacred Heart Medical Center RiverBend. z Funeral & Memorial Planning Cremation Options e Monuments & Memorials & e Memorials Cemetery Options e Monuments Cemetery Options e Funeral & Memorial Planning e Cremation Options e Please Celebrate the 4th of July Safely! 123 South 7th, Cottage Grove, Oregon th 123 South 7 , Cottage Grove, Oregon 541-942-0185 •www.smithlundmills.com z Joseph Formosa 1949-2018 Joseph Formosa passed away peacefully, surrounded by family at his home in Dorena, on Sunday, Jan. 21, after a year- long battle with colon cancer. He was born on April 6, 1949, in San Francisco to Anthony and Mary Pat Formosa. He grew up in nearby Daly City and as a kid rode his bike all over San Francisco, was catcher on the baseball team, competed in swim meets, and at age 14 got his fi rst surfboard from Jack O’Neil. After graduating from high School, Joe attended U.C. Santa Barbara, mainly because it was by the beach. After college, he moved north with friends to a wooded hillside on the outskirts of Cottage Grove. He later married and moved to a small farm in Lorane, where he worked various jobs in the woods. Joe moved back to Santa Cruz in 1980 and there he married Vicki. Blending Joe’s kids with Vicki’s, and later adding three of their own they had a big 10-kid family. Joe loved being by the ocean and surfi ng with old friends. He joined a masters’ swim team and competed in open-water races in the ocean and lakes. Joe worked at his dad’s store in San Francisco, driving 80 miles each way, but every vacation the family spent camp- ing in the Cascades or the Sierras. In 1989, Joe and Vicki found the perfect property with great neighbors in Dorena where they moved and raised their kids. Joe still enjoyed lap swimming, but his favorite summer place to swim was Dorena Lake. To support the new place Joe tried several occupations, but ended up going to truck driving school for more long term work. Joe spent the last 20 years of his life driving a maxi tractor trailer around the Northwest. He met many good friends during those years and tallied up nearly three million miles. Joe was a man of many talents and passions, including playing guitar, baking artisan bread, and keeping all the cars running. One of his most useful skills was running a chain saw, falling trees and gathering fi rewood. He loved going up to Diamond Lake to cut lodgepole pine. He also had a sharp wit and acute sense of humor; his stories still amuse and frighten his kids. Joe will be forever cherished and deeply missed, especially by his dear wife Vicki, his children Amy Stone, Rachel and Nicole Formosa, Sam, Ted and Rose Formosa, Vanya Lam- peres, Ben Yates, Mandy Myers, and Teresa Weaver. Mourning him also are his brothers, Peter, Dave, Paul and Tim Formosa, sister Gina Rogers, and eight grandchildren. His parents and a sister Anne preceded him in death. Arrangements are being handled by Smith-Lund Mills in Cottage Grove, and a cele- bration of life will be held on Feb. 17, from 1:30 to 4:30 at the Cottage Grove Community Center. Condolences may be left at www.smithlundmills.com, or sent to Smith-Lund Mills, 123 South Seventh St. Cottage Grove, OR 97424. å www.smithlundmills.com å Robert Glenn Morgan 1929-2018 Robert Glenn Morgan was born June 17, 1929 to George Brit- ton and Evelyn Nider Morgan in Los Angeles, California. He ac- cepted Christ into his life at age 15 in a Vacation Bible School at San Gabriel Union Church. He graduated from Alhambra High School. He was a sports fan all of his life, loving football and all things “Sport”. One of his favorite memories as a boy was seeing Jackie Robinson play in the L.A. Coliseum. He learned to work hard at an early age. He had his fi rst job at age 10 and was never out of work all his life until retirement. He and his family moved to Fresno, California after high school where he met Barbara Martin and they were married just before their 20 th birthdays. He joined the California National Guard, tank unit, and served two years. Then in 1951 he joined the U.S. Air Force and served in the Strategic Air Command in the motor pool for four years. Upon return to the states from his assignment in England and the end of his service, he joined the Los Angeles Police Department where he served for twenty-fi ve years. Much of that time he patrolled the L.A. freeways as a motorcycle offi cer. He was so handsome that his picture was used on a poster promoting the LAPD. A little later in his career he served on the Specialized Enforcement Unit, which had as part of its duties the privilege to meet and escort many heads of state. Bob always put his family fi rst. They had three children: Christa and Mike Proffi tt, who live in Cottage Grove . Marcella Morgan and Blane Suganuma who reside in Hawaii and Jim “Santi- ago” Morgan and Marna Anderson who live in Minneapolis. When the children were small, Bob gave up many outside activities that would have taken up his time to be available to his children. Camping was a favorite activity for many years. When he retired from the police dept, he satisfi ed a hunger in his life to drive a truck, which he did for eight years hauling sand and gravel with bottom dump trailers. When Christa and Mike who had moved to Cottage Grove, OR suggested that it would be great for her parents to move north, they responded and never looked back. They established a home on a lovely acreage that they dubbed “The Ponderosa” and were joined later on by Christa and Mike who built a home “just across the way” on adjoining property. They pitched into helping and supporting four grandchildren in all their activities: many years of 4H and for all sports ac- tivities for the four Proffi tt grandchildren, Allison (Josh Watson), Matt, (Carol), Ian and Morgan (Brent Neely). They also made many trips to Minneapolis to visit their granddaughter Evelyn Rose Morgan Anderson. At times they were following Ian’s high school football and Matt’s Idaho State University football at the same time. It was a busy, wonderful time. He started the tradition of “Pizza Night on the Ponderosa” every Saturday night for the whole family which has continued to this day. It has also been carried on by the grandkids who have moved away from home. Mike and Christa and Ian were faithful helpers in the last years of their lives making it possible for them to continue on in their forest home after they could no longer keep up with things. He and Barbara faithfully supported Riverside Community Church of God in Cottage Grove for 30 years in many ways until age slowed them down. Many people were blessed by his driving and valet ministry. He kept up with all the sports on TV and could quote you stats on golf, basket- ball, football, baseball, and softball. He was self-designated around various Cottage Grove busi- nesses as “the old bald-headed guy” and was always very kind, funny and friendly to the service people in town. And he was rarely seen without a toothpick in his mouth. He always told his wife daily how much he loved her, how nice she looked and how delicious even the poorest meal was. That is a big reason they were married for so many years. He passed away 2 hours before their 69th wedding anniversary. They are survived by the aforementioned children and grandchildren, plus great-grandchildren Joshua and John Watson, Issac, Liam, Eze- kial and Zebedee Proffi tt; Philip, Eli, Gabriel and Rebekah Neely. He is also survived by his sister Beverly Quesinberry and her family. A Celebration of Life will be held Saturday, February 10th at 2 p.m. at Riverside Community Church of God 1255 S. River Rd. Cottage Grove, Oregon. Arrangements in the care of Smith Lund Mills Funeral Chapel, Cottage Grove, Oregon.
