HOOTS! WHO0!
r
O. W. L.
(On With Laughter)
The test of efficiency is ability to
make men act.
She was born on the desert, so
they called her Carrie Vann.
The report that nickel cigars have
dropped to six cents cannot be verified.
Have you ever seen anything that
looked as helpless as a growing
mustache?
One good thing about that
It keep ; ou i m notic. the
piano is oat ut tune.
No one burns midnight oil any
more. Gas is the thing the kind one
gels at the filling station.
The man who said variety Is the
spice of life never had to change
tires three times in one day.
Only a few more months now un
til time to worry about how funny
your new si raw hat will look.
This may be an awful country but
foreigners are paying one hundred
dollars each to get smuggled in.
What in the world would have be
come of the Near East victims If
Columbus had not discovered Amer
ica? "A bridegroom is missing." Sug
gestion to bridegrooms who complain
that no one ever taeks any notice of
them.
There are not very many Ihings
that can be advertised in magazines
without silk-clad legs as illustrations.
Some one said the man who is
single wonders if he should get mar
ried. After he is mraried he wonders
why he did.
Sham battles between fiancee and
fiance are only rehearsals for the
real thing that occurs after the wed
ding ceremony.
A man in New York who rang
twice for an elevator was killed by
the operator. More and more the day
is passing when labor can be trodden
on with Impunity.
Another millionnaire has just mar
ried a musical comedy actress. It's
funny how these singers are able to
catch on to the heirs.
Consoling Thought.
We all make mistakes, but thank
goodness the other fellow's looks
worse to us than our own.
Wives of rich men all remind us,
We could make our lives sublime
If we only had the money and could
Dress them up to "time."
The reason a gentleman usually
is conceited is because "a gentleman
never forgets himself," as a writer
on how to act in society says.
Modern Romance; they became en
gaged. Later they decided to break
it off. Their tastes were not con
genial. They smoked different brands
of cigarets.
Logical.
Bible School Teacher "What was
the Tower of Babel?"
Bright Willie "Wasn't that the
place where Solomon kept his five
hundred wives?"
"Pa, where was Babe Ruth born?"
"Couldn't tell you. son."
"Where was Jack Dempsoy born?"
"Don't know that either."
"Pa, will you buy me a history of
the United States?"
The Oriole studio was closed for
remodeling and repairs for a few
weeks. It is now open under the new
name of Oriole & Crow. P. F. Oriole
and T. E. Crowe, are the owners.
Ohio Photo News.
Doctor "I am afraid I will have
to operate for appendicitis."
neauty "Oh, doctor, will the scar
show?"
Doctor "Not unless you go into
the films."
"I hope you are not afraid or
microbes." apologized the paying
teller as he cashed the school teach
er's check with soiled currency.
"Don't worry," raid 0'" young
lady, "A microbe couldn't live on my
salary."
Oh. Too vi.r I
When is a widder not a merry wid
der? Can you answer that question,
boss?
"When is a widder" (Let us consi
der! "Of course, when she's a little
cross."
Minimum's the Wold.
Want ad in Boston Olobe says:
1921 Ford Sedan, good condition,
impletely equipped with lots of ex
as to give minimum comfort."
Jontrary.
Mary had a little hen,
was feminine and nueer:
a lot when eggs were cheap,
opped when eggs were dear.
It laid
"Tired of waiting, dearie?" she
l "d. emerging from her dressing
nom after exhausting her feminine
iris in the attempt to appear beauti-'ul.
'Oh, no," he replied, wearily,
in a wife-lime."
'it's
A jug of? and Thou
. aier is a wondrous blessing,
Good for washing necks and ears;
Just the thing for irrigation,
And t!i- surrounding ships and
piers ;
Nice 10 park beneath the bridges;
Swell for making rain and ink;
Water i:; a wondrous blessing.
But it makes a darn poor drink.
Can you imagine anything more
annoying than to have a stenogra
pher who can't spell, "and who is al
ways asking you how to spell words
you can't spell yourself?"
FARM AND HOME WIRELESS
READY FOR RURAL OREGON
Farm, home and other rural com
; n-ro will be broadcasted over
Oregon by ilu Extension service
from the O. A. C. radio station at
Corvallis, beginning Monday, March
2fi. Farmers, homemakers, and other
iltizena interested in agricultural
welfare may clear their decks at 7:30
of that date and each week there
liter till further notice, and tune
ii at 380 meters for the Oregon
Agricultural college KFDG air ser
vice. Short talks on farm topics and
on nutrition and home Improvement
And brief bulletins on seasonal and
miergency matters of interest to
growers, will be featured. Announce
aients of the service will be made
by Paul V. Maris, director of the ex
tension service, and occasional no
tices will be given of important wea
iher and crop conditions, market re
ports, community gatherings, and
like matters.
"This new type of service will be
of special interest to farmers and
other rural citizens who now enjoy
literary and musical programs over
their receiving sets," says Mr. Maris,
'We hope it will be a welcome addi
lon to their service and make their
receiving sets more interesting and
valuable."
A good many farmers and others
outside the large centers of popula
tion are said to have receiving sets
and still others are planning to
install them soon.
The O. A. C. sending radius is
good. The station is broadcasting
two or three evenings a week, at
about 7; 3H to 8:30 or 9 p. m. The
program from March 26 till changes
ire announced will be as follows:
Monday, Ian. i and rural community
iev;s; Tue.day, miscellaneous mat
ers; Wednesday, college music-be-zinnijLg
about 8; sometimes on Fri-
lay, phonograph-" records.
FARM POINTERS
(Farm Notes From O.A.C. Exp. Ssa.)
Wild oats, broken seed and many
.veed seeds are useful for feed If
kept at home. The use of them in
his way saves expense to the grower
r shippsr. Clean grain, free from
lockage sells better and actuality
osts less per ton of clean grain for
.hipment than grain carrying a lot
if dockage. The same principle holds
n shipping good potatoes containing
i lot of culls. The good potato or
;ood grain must pay (or the storage
inu freight and hauling of the dock
ige and culls.
The alfalfa fields that are grassy
ir weedy should be thoroughly cul
ivated with an alfalfa cultivator or a
pring tooth harrow to clear the
rash out of the field and give the
ill'alfa a chance to grow. Thorough
ultivation requires going over the
field a number of times to com
pletely tear out all the shallow
.ooted grasses and weeds.
Three grain oats Is a particularly
good variety for weste-n Oregon
ioils. .
Mangels and carrots make good
lelds of excellent stock feed on rich
.veil drained land.
Kurisu, highly advertised in news
papers and by a number of southern
seedsmen has been a failure in this
state.
u:!an grass has been extensively
d in Or; gon and without success
in tiie hottest irrigated re-
Dv.arf E. sex rape, Beeded at "
winds to the acre, in April, May or
lune, makes excellent summer pa:s
ure for hogs or sheep.
Weght of Elephant.
Mow much does a big lltpfcllt. n
full-;:roun "tusker," weigh? Recent In
quiry disclosed the fact tltat rmbcKlv
seemed to know. The keeper of the
elephant house at a city BOO, who
theiiL-bt he knew all there wns to know
about the paehydenns, was obliged to
confes. that he could not nnwer the
question. Further investigation, how
ever, elicited the information that an
Asiatic elephant of average size weighs
about 04t pounds. The celebrated
Jumbo, the lHrifest elephant ever
know n, weighed 15,000 pounds. Phila
delphia Ledger.
t Farm Notes from O. A. C. Experi
ment Station.)
CLEAN SEED
BEFORE TREATMENT
Seed era
formaldehyde tr
thoroughly clean
cracked grain, w
to be treated with the
treatment should be
1 to get rid ot the
5d seeds anci trash
before treating. The material cleanec
out often makes good feed and the
. lean seed produces a better stand.
Grain treated with formaldehyde
should be planted as soon as it is
dry enough to run through a drill.
Seed left moist with formaldehyde
Seed left moist with formaldehyde
for more than a day sometimes loses
germination, and the longer it re
mains moist, tin- greater the loss.
LBS AND CARROTS tiOOR
BUT FRIED SPUDS RUNK
NOTICE FOR PUT5LICATION
Department of the Interior, I'nited
States Land Office at The Dalles,
Ore.. March 15, 1923.
Notice is hereby given that Claude
White, of Boardman, Ore., who, on
Aug .1, 1917, made Homestead Entry
No. 019112, for E Vs SW V; NE . E'i;
NWViSEii, being Tail "0". Umatil
hi Project, Section 24. Township 4
North, Range 24 East. Willamette
Meridian, has filed notice of inten
tion to make three year Proof, to
establish claim to t he land above
described, before C. C. lilayden,
United States Commissioner, at
Boardman. Ore., on the 2ath day of
April, 1923. .
Claimant names as witnesses:
Dottier J. Onson, Eugene Cumins,
S. 11 Boardman, Chas. Nizer, all of
Boardman, Ore.
J. M. DONNELLY,
7-1 1 Register
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
An apple a day keeps the doctor
away, so does a fresh crisp carrot
eaten plain or with a little salt.
You should eat fruit 365 days a
year.
era ham flour is a good complexion
powder. Get the brown bread habit.
There are many better hings to eat
;han hot cakes, but there are not
many worse.
"Prohibition" should include fried
potatoes.--0. A. C. Home Demon
trat ion.
U. S. Land
Ore., Feb. 23,
Not ice is hereb
mln F. Atteberry
who. on Jan. 14.
stead Entry No.
The Dalit
SPRAY GUN'S TAKE POWER
Throw away your spray gun and
go back to the use of an extension
rod and nozzles, advises Mr. LeKoy
Childs of the Hood River Experiment
station, unless your spray machine
will easily deliver five or six gallons
er minute, maintaining at least 300
pounds pressure. If your spray outfit
can measure up to Ibis capacity, a
single gun and no more can be used
to advantage. The use of spray guns
on outfits too small for 'the purpose
-ias lost many a grower all of his
ipple profits in late, years because
of imperfect results obtainable in
scab and worm contiol.
IS YOUR VOICE EFFICIENT
WHEN YOV TELEPHONE 7
Most people desire to make their
talk effective whether for business
or social reasons. Some succeed in
talking effectively and some do not.
Where lies the difference? The best
authorities say that the most effec
lve speaking is that which conveys
the meaning of the message with the
least effort on the part of the hearer.
What is true of direct speech is
equally true and even more import
ant in the case of speech transmitted
by telephone.
You are quickly appreciative of a
person who speaks over the tele
phone clearly and pleasantly, not too
fast nor too slow, not too loud nor
too soft, with h careful enunciation
of each word and syllable, with the
lips facing and not too far from the
transmitter and in a well modulated
voice.
When you find such a person on
the wire you listen with appreciation
and .sympathy, as to a friend even
though the voice is one you never
heard before. It is needless to point
out your reactions when the tele
phone is not properly used. Perhaps
you make bold to say "Speak into
the transmitter," or "Don't talk so
fast," or "Louder, please," or "please
say tthat again." When everything
Mse fails you say. or feel like say
ing. "Write me about it or come and COMMUNITY
see me." Perhaps more often you '
lose Interest and say "No, When yon
are not quite sure What it is all about
or say an unwilling '"Yes," Which
you quickly decide means nothing
and will be countermanded.
You have never yet discovered any
mechanism or human organisation
that is perfect, and the telephone
system sometimes fails. But if you
stop lo think you realize that the
telephone people are in the nature
of things doing their best to please
you and make the service as good
as possible. You will also realize that
over the same telephones and wire.-,
one person is clearly understood and
another is exasperat ingly incoherent.
It follows that o uappreciate and
are influenced by those who use the
telephone coirect'y. Consequently,
the intelegent self-interest of those
who have occasion to use the tele
phone makes it imperative that they
regard not only the courtesies of tel
ephone usage but the simple meas of
making themselves easily under
stood .
Office at
23, 1923.
y given that IHn.ia
of Boardman, Ore.,
19 IS, made Ilome-
0195S5, for NWV.
NWV,, being Unit "E", Section 20,
Township 4 North, Range 25 East,
Willamette Meridian, has fil 'd notice
of intention to make three year proof,
to establish claim to the land above
described, before C. G. 'Blayden,
United States Commissioner, at
Boardman. Oregon, on the 11th day
of April, 1923.
Claimant names as witnesses:
C. H. Atteberry i S. Atteberry,
Frank Otlo. W. A. Price, all of
Boardman, Ore.
J. W. DONNELLY.
4-9 Register.
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
Department of the Interior, IT. P.
Land Office at The Dalles, Oregon.
Feb. 13, 1923.
Notice is her 'by given that Ernest
Ar.ihio.se Brown of Boardman, Ore
gon, who. on Aug. 3. 1917, made
Homestead Entry No. 019118, for
SWViNWV,, being Unit "0" Uma
tilla Project, Section 11, Township
4 north, Bange 25 east. Willamette
Meridian, has tiled notice of inten
tion to make three year proof, to es
tablish claim to the land above de
scribed, before C. O. Blayden, I'ni
ted States Commissioner, at Board
man, Oregon, on the 26th day of
March, 1923.
Claimant names as witnesses:
Ray L. Brown. Clen E. Brown,
Walter Gordon Cohoon, Joseph T.
Healey, all of Boardman, Ore.
3-7 J. W. CONNELLY, Register.
The Best is none too good
Try our Sherwin-Williams paints
and varnis hes. There is none better.
alse
We have a complete line of
Cedar Flume Stock
Building Material
Builders' Hardware
Cement, Lime, Wood, Coal, Posts
W. A. MURCIill
Boardman, Oregon.
iNMasiRjnMimT
illtMIIIHIillllliillliiililtllllllllillll
lltlUlllUHMtMltUatttHUaUtMUWh
R. N. Stwnfleld, President
Ralph A. Holte, Cashier
Prank Sloan, 1st VicePreeidenl
M II. l iog, .Mul l( e-l'resiilenl
kink .of Stanficld
Capital Stock and Surplus
$37,500.00
Four Per Cent Interest Paid on Time Certificates
of Deposit
i
'!'i:!!j:ni'l;!'li';!" nnei;;;
wm iiiiiwi i'linic lii'iBunii !'!' iiiKiiipmii
Tribut? to tne Apple.
No other fruit is capable of so timet
variety in service or presentation as
is the apple, ill tile bands of a realty
good housewife, an apple can be made
to do duty for almost any course ot
any meal. From the plain raw app.'e
to that crowning masterpiece of all
nppledom, the apple pie, there are
more dishes de poimnes than have ever
been cotmied. Think, for Instance. n
fried apples with bacon, of Brown
Betty, of baked apples stuffed with
nuts, of apple and cabbage salad, ot
spiced apples, and apple .telly, and
fresh apple sauce with Ringer bread
i-iid apples and cheese there's no end
to the list.
BULLETIN
OP BOARDMAN
CHURCH SERVICE
Our Pride Sweet Milk Bread
iBMtWIIIIII'IWM
TRY A LOAF OF OUR SWEET MILK BREAD.
IT'S DELICIOUS,
Made with Pure Sweet Milk.
ASK YOUR GROCER.
Fclto Bakery & Confectionery
Everything Thais Good in The Bakery Line
Echo, Oregon
I-
Every Sunday
Sunday school 10:30 a y
Church Service 11:80 a TO,
Christian hndeavor 7:30 p. m
All are welcome
J. I'". GIBSON, Pastor
DR. F. V. PRIME
l K If T IH T R V
Dental X-ray and Diagnosis
HRRMISTON. ORE.
Rank RuildinK
Phones: Office :i:s. Residence 761
WOODSON & SWEEK
ATTORNEYS-AT-1. AW
Masonic ItnlldliiK
Heppner, Oregon.
M YNUFA( T TRIORS
of
Bluestem fs Flour
SK YOUR GROCER FOR IT
All kinds of Mill ! find
t it1 d i t ii
Gcbo Flour mills
Echo, OretjoR
Let The Boardman Mirror Print Your Butter Wrapper
NOTICE TO BURHCRIRERH
We have boxed an ex'ract from
the postal laws on second-class sub
scriptions and placed it on the front
pase in this issue where we hope
every reader of this paper w ill go
over it carefully, even if they feel
they are already familiar with it.
The reason we have done so is that
we have been putting a stamp on !
some of the papers we send out for
some time.
You will notice that the pMtofflce
department allows a certain latitude
of time durir.K which period the pub
lisher may send his paper at the
po.ind rates to readers who have not
j paid up. That period is one fear
I after the subscription has run out.
Not a minute's grace is allowed. The
name must come off the list or else
the publisher ot the paper must
; place a one cent stamp on each copy
; of the paper that he sends out from
I then on to that delinquent subscrlb
! er.
I We are not onlv out the paper and
ink on all unpaid subscript ions but
j have 'o pay one cnt cash out of our
i own pockets for every paper sent to
readers who have failed to pay wl'h
: in the past year.
S. E.
A TTO R N
in
O flici
IIBPPKER
NOTSON
K Y - A I - I, A W
Court IIoiish
ORBOON
DR. W. VV. ILLSLEY
Osteopathic
PHYSICIAN : WUROKON
'Phme Kes 711 Office 551
I Ace over Hank Bids;., Hermistoti
Calls answered at all hours.
DR. ALEX WDER RE ID
I'liysiiian and Surgeon
MATTLLA - - OREGON
OR FRANC IS P ADAMS
I'UVsk i AND KUROEON
HKRMISTON, ORE,
Bank Ridx 'Phones: Office 92
Residence 595.
Office Hours 9-12. 3-1.
Calls Answered Day or Night.
Newton Pairl:ss Dentists
Dr. H. A. Newton, Mgr.
Printing is the inseparable com-i
panion of achievement. R. T. Porte' I your subscription paid in advanoe? COT, .Main and Webb Sit.. PeMllWtMl
Th Thrill of Love!!!
Do YOMF LOVE Better?
The Thrill of the Human
Touch !
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FOR A M ATI;?
Why SlKMild a Girl be Mai led
Before 1 and the Man Before SI?
Marriage, Divorce, l.ove, BtlfenlCS,
Hirth Control, Sex Hygiene, etc . etc
HOW To MARRY BUCCE&HKITL
AND ATTAIN HAUI'INLSS
These a i e enly otne of 'he ;nbj lets
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