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ASTORIA. OREGON:
THURSDAY.
.MAY 1U. 1SS7
A LONG REIGN,
' Kkxt Tuesday Queen Victoria
will -celebrate her 6Sth birthday.
In about a month, Great Britain
will celebrate tbo completion of
the fiftieth year of her reign.
With the exception of George III.,
no English monarch during the
last five hundred years has worn
the crown as many years as- the
present soveriegn. It is the long
duration of her reign that gives to
this event its principal interest.
When Victoria succeeded to the
throne the term of the eighth
president of the United States had
just begun, and the twenty-second
president, now holding that office,
was a few months old. The
aueen's reisrn covers more than
one-half of the period since the
organization of our federal govern
ment. In the length of her reign
she surpasses all other living sov
ereigns, unless the reign of the
present emperor of Brazil is dated
from thettime of his succession to
the crown and npt from the time
when he was declared of age, an
event which "took place three
years after Victoria's accession.
The length of the period during
which the British government has
been conducted in the name of
Queen Victoria must impress it
self upon hex own subjects aud
other contemporaries. Men now
over seventy wore minors when
her reign began. The memories
of only a small number of persons
reach to a time when England had
another sovereign. The celebra
tion will become a demonstration
of loyalty or attachment to the
monarchical institution to which
so large a portion oi the British
people are attached by sympathies,
habits and interests. These two
features of the jubilee, the extra
ordinary character of the event and
loyalty toward the crown, will
overshadow the tribute to the
queen personally. The celebra
tion, so far as the people are to
take part in it, will be cordial, if
not enthusiastic, and will be of
much interest to the entire civil
ized, world.
"Old age" is a terra of verv un
certain signification. There are
people who never seem to be
young, oven in their twenties.
And thero are people who. do not
seem to be old, even up in the
eighties. Gladstone, it seventy
eight, is younger.than many of the
fossilized youth of the house of
lords.
The late report of the Illinois
bureau of labor statistics contains
the result of an investigation as to
the time in which labor is em
plojed in that state. The figures
are to the effect that only 20 per
cent of the workingmen there are
employed full time, anil 115 per
rent, less than half ttni-.
"Idle labor is becoming moie and
more rare. The tendency is to
advance in wages, regardless of
strikes. The builders throughout
the west have arrangements made
for a very active season, and build
ing supplies of all kinds have been
lib.rally purchased.
The decline in the price of cop
per since 1882, is most remarkable,
the aggregate decrease amounting
to about 8120 per ton in the mar
kets of Europe. The Economist
attributes this serious decline to
the discoveries of copper in Mon
tana. TnE time of the ocean steamship-passage
has been reduced by
more than one-half since 1840, and
by more than 140 per cent since
1860.
.Among the Republican clubs of
Ohio a movement is on foot to
make the anniversary of Lincoln's
birth a regular party day of cele
bration. Gen. Phil. Sheridan is spoken
of as the dark horse for Mr.
Blaine, John Sherman and Mr. Al
lison to be afraid of.
WHY HE CARRIED A POTATO.
THE BROKER ALWAYS X1FT
ONE IN HIS HIP POCKET.
He Did Not Curry it Tor Lack, But
ta Kmp Bhcumatltni ak ey A
Friend Point Oat a Better Thing
and IarettlffatloB Froraa Him te
Be XMght AWondrfalDlgooTry.
Xcw York Worid, Kerch C, 1SS7. -""!
IDINQ
down town
the other
morning
on the
Third av
enue road I
caught a
later, train
than usual
and found
the car full
of 1-o'clock
brokers on
their way to Wall street to begin their
day's busmesa. Four natty-looking
men occupied the cross seats opposite
each other in the middle of the car.
They were evidently well acquainted
and old-time social as well as busi
ness friends. The talk was stocks, of
course how Lackawanna went down
and O. T. up and down, and the dis
cussion was getting warm when the
oldest member of the party pulled
out a handkerchief from his hip
pocket and in the action dropped
Bomethine on the floor. All four
stopped talking until the lost object
was finally fished out from under a
seat. The finder gravely examined
it, held it up for the inspection of the
others and asked, "What the deuce
is it?"
"A potato," replied the owner,
looking a little sheepish and reaching
out for it. -vrak
" What are you carrying it around
in your pdeket for? Do you expect a
famine? Have you got a steak Iso
in your coat pocket?"
" No, but I want my potato. It is
for rheumatism."
"For rheumatism?"
"Yes; don't you know that if you
carry a potato in your pocket it will
cure rheumatism? It hasn't cured
mo yet," he added thoughtfully, ca
ressing his knee with gentle touch,
" but I live in hope. So give me my
potato."
He got his mascot and the other
three gentlemen laughed at the super
stition of their friend, who went on to
tell how he had suffered for two years
withtwinges of rheumatism and how
nothing seemed to do him any good.
The one who had found the potato
said that it served him right to suffer
so. Any man who did not know
enough to take the propetmedicine
ought to have the rheumatism, and
have it bad, too. The potato carrier
protested that he had tried all kinds
of remedies and employed the best
physicians in New York city, but
without effect.
"But you haven't tried the right
thing," continued "his friend. "My
wife was troubled the same way for
years, and in four months was com
pletely cured. I will bet you a dinner
for the four of us at Delmonico's that
I can tell you a secret that will make
you well before the summer hotels
open again. Of course, you won't be
lieve I shall succeed, so I am sure to
win the bet." The average broker
takes to a wager as naturally as a
duckling to the water, and of course
the bargain was agreed to. The
young man fished about in his wallet
and at last from some secret hiding
place drew out a card inscribed:
" Pardee Medicine Company, Roches
ter, N. Y." " You write to the com
pany," he said, passing over the card,
" and get half a dozen bottles of Dr.
Pardee's Rheumatic Remedy, and if
you are not satisfied I Bhalf be glad
to furnish the dinner. But there is
not the slightest probability of my
being the victim. I am sure to win
and you are sure to get cured. For
four years my wife was almost a con
stant sufferer. Except in the brightest
weather she was always complaining.
We tried everything, but somehow
the disease seemed to hang on. Then
an old doctor, retired from practice,
who Bpends his time reading, told me
that he had heard of a discovery of a
new way of treating rheumatism. An
old English army physician, Dr. Par
dee, had discovered a new remedy
that treated rheumatism in a perfectly
new way as a disease of the blood.
The thing struck me as at least plau
sible, and with some little trouble I
got Dr. Pardee's address and sent for
some of the medicine. The result
you see in this wager. Why, after
the very first bottle my wife was a
different woman. That was only last
year, and ever since I have gone
about praising Dr. Pardee's Rheu
matic Remedy just as if I were a-paid
agent. Wonder whether I couldn't
collect from the Pardee company for
the good I do? But here is my sta
tion," as the conductor called out
Hanover square, and the four friends
filed out together.
Of course I don't know yet who won
the wager; but I mean to find out as
soon as possible, and will tell you all
about it and the dinner. But this il
lustrates as well as anvthincrl have
seen in a long time the fondness for
betting which possesses the average
Wall-street man. In no other place
on all this green earth would two men
dare to make such a serious thing as
rheumatism the subject of a wager.
I fell in with an old friend, a doctor,
shortly after this and was telling him
about.it, when he said: "Doyouknow
that discovery you heard mentioned
is a singular thing. Of course, as a
regular practitioner I ought not to Bay
anything about it, but I have looked
into tne matter some ana am con
vinced that Dr. Pardee has struck up
on something that medical men have
been searching after for years. Ever
since .the days when Socrates "taught
in Athens and Antony maae love to
Cleopatra, man has been cursed with
this disease. Down through the
ages, century after century has slipped
away and still this scourge has main
tained its hold on the children of
men. Liniments, lotions, blisters and
all kinds of local applications have
had their day and passed away. It
has remained for the genius of the
njnatttntb century to discover the
Itrascausj oijthe dimse. As the
blood is the life, so any interruption
to the healthful course "of the blood
finds expression in this form of pain.
Now, Dr. Pardee has located the cause
of the trouble and seems to have
marked out a remedy. It is what
men hoped for when the Pyramids
were building and it is what men are
hoping for now. If he has, at last,
solved the problem the discovery will
take its place in history by the side of
the discovery of chloroform and the
grand inventions of the age."
It seems odi to the laymen to con
nect such apparently different diseases
as neuralgia and rheumatism, yet
they both come from the blood, says
this physician, and are cu-ed by some
what similar remedies. The medi
cines of the Pardee company, in their
action upon the system, are said to
give to the patient a feeling of fresh
ness and vigor, to send the rich blood
pulsing through the veins in a fashion
that makes women teellike heroines
and men like conquerors. -Somehow,
and in some way that I don't profess
to understand, it takes' hold of the
kidneys and liver, stirs these organs
up like a farmer rousing a lazy tramp,
and makes such things as sick head
aches and these gloomy, depressed
feelings that some people are often
possessed of, imposibie. l don't know
why the medicine ."does all this, but I
have half a dozen wildly enthusiastic
friends who say it haB helped them
in that way, and that suffices for me.
All Pacific Coast druggists keep the
Pardee Remedy.
Ready to Speculate at Any Time.
An agent called on a Dakota man
saying: - '
"You have been recommended to
me as a prominent citizen, and I have
a patent ice cream freezerhere which
I would like to sell you. It is"
"Don't want it"
"It is something new and H
"Tell you I wouldn't have it."
"But I am sure you would '
"Wouldn't; no use for it; never eat
ice cream." -
"But it only costsTSl.50, and perhaps-"
. irLc
"No perhaps about it; wouldn't
take yourfreezer as o gift."'
"Well, I have another scheme here.
II am sellinjrbhancea for a drawing on
the same freezer. There are one
hundred tickets 'at a dollar apiece."
,wWellt that's more like -it; put my
name down' for two tickets. This iB
speculation, and" I always go in on
anything of that kind." Dakota Sell.
NEW TODAY.
For Sale. "
T
WO NEW FISHING BOATS. JUST
cempleted: guaranteed quality. Ap
ply at boat sho. of JOS. LEATHERS.
Boat Building.
MANY YEARS; EXPERIENCE IN
buildlnc boats' ou the Columbia river
and hundreds of fine boats of my build
make my guaranteet for good work. Head
quarters at the old Astoria Iron Works
building. Will balld boats at any point on
the Columbia river where my services stay
be required.
WM. HOWE.
ToLiverpoolDirect
The one urstclass iron barque
GKLENAVON.
"Aai atLloydsieSQtoos register
Goes on the berth immediately and will
have good despatch for Liverpool. For
freight apply to TAYLOR, YOUNG & CO.
or to A. W. BERRY, Portland.
Astoria.
Are You Insured?
J. O. Bozorth
Writes Insurance Policies in Reliable Flie
Insurance companies that give Absolute
Protection In caie of Fire.
Jtr. Bosuaa WtM. Xra. LUUam Warren.
:eixxz?:e:
DRESSMAKING
PAEL0S8.
Coiner Cass and Jefferson, up fcUlre, are
now ready for orders from the ladies of
Astoria and ndnlty. We do only first class
work by a late system adopted In fronton
able circles everywhere.
All work guaranteed.
Comparison challenged.
Terms reasonable.
LOUIS MARTIN,
'Ship Carpenter.
Beat Huit, Spriti tad Bcoai to be had ut
all times. Price Sl.SO a set. Xst 82.00.
Bmbi $1.25. 8jriU $1.00, First class
work guaranteed.- Opposite Arndt & Ferch
en's machine shop."foot of Lafayette btreet,
Astoria,
Magnus G. Crosby
jDealet in
HARD! ARS, IRON, STEEL.
Iron Pipe.artd Fittings,
STOVES, TINWARE
i AND
HOUSE FURNISHING GOODS
SHEET LEAD STRIP LEAD
SHEET IRON,
Tlaa. AND Ooipoac.
Notice.
T CAUTION ANY ONE FBOM TRUSTING
my wife Mrs. A. O. Wills, as she has left
my bed and boarding without just cause.
Hue Is the daughter of 3fa, Welmaa.
MayHta, '8T.
Books,
Stationery,
WE DO
WANT THE
Modest Prices are Satisfactory. Small profits arc StilHciont.
Acceptable. We reach your approval through Low Prii o-. 'v
stock or
Watches, Clocks, Jewelry and Silverware
OurstrckU Fresh. New and Stllsh. LOOK US OVER- If c do not vivo you
mooey wo will nuke some ona olso sail you Low.
CJLELXi iLIDXaEH? Manager
Musical
Instruments.
Cutlery,
CRYSTAL
A. V
W HOLES ALE AND
Fine Groceries, Provisions and Mil! Feed,
Crockery, Glass Plated. Ware.
o
Tup Largest and finest assortment of
Fresli Fruits and "Vegetables.
Received f rash every Steamer.
CTY
Our Stock is Larger than ever before. All Xow (foods
and direct from Kastern Factories.
FINE STATIONERY,
SCHOOL AND BLANK BOOKS,
MISCELLANEOUS BOOKS,
Baby Carriages, Bird Cages, Croquet Sets,
FISHING TACKLE, ETC.
.LGHESia? for
Whiting's Standard Writing Papers.
The Domestic Sewing Machine.
Pacific Coast Charts and Tide Tables.
GRIFFIN & REED.
l J I V- '''X)
X A l (
v V A
.The Long
IS, I Toll
JEFF
Of the U. S. Restaurant gives the best Meal for the money
to be had on the Coast. His Regular Dinner with
Tea, Coffee, Wine,Beer or Milk for 25cts.
Cannot he Beat.
Meals Cooked to Order on Short Notice
Oysters In Any Style and Always Fresh.
2?i2iBt Class Saloon AacL
LODGING HOUSE
In Connection With
H HKTROM
Ail .ft A,M k X XlS J.T.L
WATCHMAKER.
Just received a lanro stock of
"Watches
.. w.vwa, U1IIHU3, iAIUIkCia, ClU. AISU
genulneeth Thomas Boat Clocks, proved to
be the beat. Ail which win hn nirf nt vrv
ana Clocks. Chains. Lockets, etc. Also
low prices. Watch and Clock repairing a
specialty, and done at reasonable prices.
Shop next to Aug. DanIelson's Sample
Room, on the roadway.
Notions,
Bird Cages,
Moderate Patronage Is
have now an Inmunsc
Baby
Carriages.
Picture Frames,
J
RETAIL DEALER IN
and Short of it.
YO-UL Pllt
The Restaurant.
! DRESSMAKING.
I 3I Brvcewou'.d resDectiullv inform
the ladies of Astoria and surrounding
countrj'ttbat she has recently received a
large addition to ber stock of dress button-
and trimmings, which she will sell at
reasonable price.
Dressmaking m all Its branches done
promptly, and in first class stIe; and
satisfaction guaranteed.
Cuttlns and fitting a specialty.
Next door to Abtobiax otBce on Cass St,
Astoria, April 25tb, 1837,
NOT
EARTH.
ALLEN
WE CARRY A
Full Line of Brj and Fasicj Goods,
Keady Made Clothing,
Gents' Furnishing Goods Hats I Caps
We have just received a large lot of
GENTS' FINE SHOES
Direct froni Manufacturer.
3
Children's Youths' and blisses' Shoes
In all styles and grades, And the finest as irttnenl of I l !HLs' SiiOEg
to be found irf Astoria.
W. T. PASSES., Manager.
BOOTS and SHOES.
Genuine English Porpoise Shoes For Gents.
Ladles Flexible Sole Shoes In Fieneh, Kangaroo aud Dongidu
Boys and Youths Shoes of all Kinds. Midi's and Childrens and Infant heels.
Spilng heel3. WE DEAL TO ROOTS A3D SHOES OSLY.0
P. J. GOODMAN.
3??"
EL B. PilBMJSR,
DKALKU IN
Hay, Oats, anil Straw, Lime, Brici, CbeM, Sand ana Plate
Wood Delirered to Order.
TER apply to the Captain, or to
Strike It Ri
-HUT YOUR-
Groceries i Provisions!
-OF
Foard & Stokes
t
Their largely Increasing trade enables
them to self at the very lowest margin
of profit while giving you goods '
that nro of first class quality.
Goods Delivered All Over the City.
The Highest PrlcelPaul for Junk.
-THE-
DIAMOND PALACE!
GUSTAY HANSEN, PropV.
A Large and Ven Selected Stock of Fine
Diamonfls i Jewelry
At Extremely Low Prices.
All (loods Bought at This Est&MUhmeut )
"Warranted Genuine.
Watch and Clock Repairing
A SPECIALTY. J
Corner Caw and Squemoqita Streets. .
J. H; D. GKAY
Wholesale and retail dealer u
GROCERIES FLOUR, AND FEED
Hay, Oats, Straw, Wood, Etc.
LIME, SAND AND CEMENT,
General Storafje and "Wharfage on reason
able terms. Foot of Benton street, Astoria.
Oregon.
rs
Oh!:
AT GRIFFIN & REED'S.
ut
cs
Ul
CO
o
CO
UJ
I ll nil III 'II ifn iik iii nun ii in mm
Kid
and
Drajing, Teamlnir and ExpreiR Boilaeiu.
STEAJIESl
(IUIU PARKER
Ebcn P. Parker, Master.
For TOWING, FRKIGUT orCllAK
L B. PAItKKB.
BEAT
rsains
IN
Baby Buggies
AND
Musical Instruments
AT THE
New York Novelty Store
AmericanNews Depot
ON SALE
The latest Magazines and Illustrated
papers of the day.
Swedish, Danish and German 'papers,
Books and Dictionaries.
Lovell and Seaside Libraries, School
Books, SUtlorifcry, etc. A BALMANNO,
unenaiuus at. nearaiain.
Salmon Vessels.
Astoria to Liverpool Direct.
We shall nlaco on the berth as tna
first ot our Direct line of sailing vessels
to Liveipool,
Tho fine Iron Bark
WARWICK OASTLE.
Classed AAl, 1158 Tons Eegister
To be followed by strictly first class vessels
during the Salmon Shipping season.
For rates of Freight and insurance apply
to MEYEK, WILSON & CO.
Portland or San Francisco,
or to WILSON, MEYER & CO.
15 Brunswick St., Liverpool.
3 8
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i tSIsSs