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About Oregon City enterprise. (Oregon City, Or.) 1871-188? | View Entire Issue (April 19, 1872)
OREGON CITY, OREGON, FRIDAY, APRIL 19, 1872.
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A "P TP P A 1J PTTW UMTPDDDTQP
OJililiOW U11 i JMM 1 JiKrKlMi.
Sljc iUcckln Enterprise.
Business Man, the Farmer
J ad the FAMILY CIRCLE.
liSl'EU EVERY FKID.VY "DY
EDITOR AND rtlRLISHER.
OFFICE la Dr. Thc'sing's Brick BuilJing
TERMS of SUBSCRIPTION:
Single Copy one year, in advance, $2 50
TEH MS of A D VEll TISLXG :
Transient advertisements, including all
Ic-xnX notices, l sq. of 12 lines, 1 v.$ 2 50
For et'h snbsequentinsertion , . 1 00
(He Column, mie year $120 00
Half " " M
Oiarter " " 40
Business Card, 1 square one year 12
tCg- Htmitlitnrf: to be made tit the rink o
Subscribers, and at the expense of Agents.
JJOOIC AND JOB PJUNTING.
ry The Enterprise office is supplied with
beautiful, approved styles of type, and mod
ern MACHINE PRESSES, which will enable
the Proprietor to do Job Piinting at all times
Neat, Quick and Cheap !
tiT3- Work solicited.
All lluine tran-ntctions upon a Speeie hn-si.-'.
B USINESS CA RJJ S.
F. BARCLAY, Kl. ft. C. S.
l'orraeily Suvt on to the Hon. II. 15. Co.
35 Vtars Excel lence.
PRACTICING PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON,
Main Mret, Oregon C'ily,
ATTORNEYS AND COLNSELORS AT-LAW,
OREGON CITY, OKEG0N.
WILL PRACTICE IN ALL THE COURTS
of the State.
2--"peci:il attention n'ven to caes in the
U.s. l.iind Otik-e at Oregon City.
April ", l-72:tf
J. M. THOMPSON', C W. FITCH.
7H jmGQfi l FITCH,
AU-oi'sacys sit ILsaw,
Real Estate Agents,
EUGEH i CITY, OREGON,
OFFICE TWO DOOIIS NORTH OF THE POSTOFFICK.
"REAL ESTATE I'.OITOIIT AND SOLD,
LOANS NKUO HATED, AND AB
STRACT OF TITLES FURNISHED.
,TE HAVE A COMPLETE ABSTRACT
of" Title ot till i.rouertv in Eugene
ftv and iipitVet nlatsot the same, pifpai ed
with great care. We will practice in the
ditr-rent Courts of the Stat -. Special at
tention iiiven to the clL-chon of all claims
that inav be placed in our hands. Lpral
Tenders bought and sidd. senst!
JOHX M. 15 AC OX,
CIX C05 'XZ5 K?s3
STATIOXHILV, lEUFUMERY, &c., &c,
Oregon City, Oregon.
At Chann-i" "- ll'trrner'.-i old nturi d ', lately oc
cupied bu S. Ack' riiom, Maii street.
1 10 tf
1bJI DEALER IN
BOOKS AND STATJONEP.Y)
IN MYERS FIRE PROOF BRICK,
M STItHET, ORF.OON CITY, OREGON.
DR. J. WELCH,
OFFICE -In Odd Fellows' Trnle, for
ot First atut Alder Streets, Portland.
The patronage, of those desiring superior
operations is in special request. Nitrousox
idj for the painless extraction of teeth.
7 Sff Artificial teeth "better than the best,'
3a 1 t'.hntf) '' the cli" ipc-it.
Will he in Oregon Citvon Saturdays.
y II. W ATKINS, M. D.,
OFFICE -0 Fellows' Temple, corner
Pirst ,Tid Mder -streets Residence corner of
rj.ain and Seventh streets.
V7. F. KIGHFIELD,
pstil.lished since IStO.at tl-.e old stand,
M tin Street, Oregon City, Oregon.
An Assortment of Watches , Jew
elry, anil Seth Thomas' weight
Clocks, allot" whi"h are warranted
to he as represented.
Renaninsrs done on short notice,
md thaakful for past fa vers.
--t. .!-Ci l.itV ilrn vm.in.
filtLz on EG o X CITY.
tS VI! orders fiir th lelivery of merchan
dise or p-vkages and freight of whatever de
ciptioT. to anv pirt of the city, will beexe
jive l promptly and with care.
TEW YORK HOTEL,
No. 17 Front Street, opposite the Mai! steam
ship landing-, Portland. Oregon.
H. R0THF0S, J. J. WILKENS,
Board per Week $500
" with Lodging 6 00
" " Dar 1 CO
"WHEXKVER I SIT IX THE TAVI
LIG11T." Whenever I sit in lh twilight,
At rest from toils, of the day.
And the little ones gather around me,
Too weary for laughter and play,
I think, with the ioagin ol sorrow and
Of the one little child that's away.
Away from the arms of the mother.
And sometimes it grieves me to know.
Content wi:h the love that surrounds him.
lie will never miss us below:
For he looks ia the face ot the Father
And walks with the saints to and fro.
I love, in my fancy, to follow
Their steps by the river so fur.
And list to :he wonderful stories
The angels are telling him there
The beautiful angels of Paradise.
And dear little Silverhair.
There's the angel that spake unto Ilagar.
'Fear not. tor God heareth thy moan;"
And the one that came tlyiti;,' to Mary.
All shining with light from the throne:
And the strong, bless'd seraphs that sooth
ed '.lie dear Lord.
"When tempted and faiming alone.
But grandest of all is the angel.
Whose story I often have n-ad.
"Who came to the tomb of the Savior
And rolled back the stone from his head.
And sa'd to the weepers that trembled to
The Lord is gone up from the dead."
Oh. angel of life and of glory.
Come whisper the message to me.
When sadly I sit and remember
The child that has gone from my knee;
For I know in the mansions where Jesus
His little ones surelv vmst he.
New Hampshire Election.
COERCION' AND BRIBERY.
Looking over returns lrom towns
in Xow 11am psliiro, as published
in the Xew York Tribune, we see
that the Republican tiins have
been mostly in the mainifaetuiin
towns. For instance, the report
ed Republican uains are 200 in
Dover, 500 in .Manchester, 100 m
Xashua, 200 in Portsmouth, (Xavy
Yard, itc.,) Somersworth, 300;
Concord , 200; Rochester, 100, and
smaller lnauufactutinir towns in
Ot course the operatives were
coerced this year over and above
other years. I5v this mennis 2.000
or 2,500 frain was made for Re
publican candidate for Governor
Straw Superintendent of the
Manchester Mdls. ihc tale ot
fraud m the use ot" money is thus
told in a special telegrams to the
A HEAVY VOTE BRIBERY.
The vote east is unprecedented
ly lar;e, as was expected would
be the case, but from information
already received, it is certain that
the fraudulent vote cast by the
Radicals far excels the Radie.d
majority, Xot less than one hun
dred fraudulent votes were east in
this city, while more than double
that number must have been cast
in Manchester, and in other places
in proportion. Rribery was open
ly resorted to, and voters were
bought like cattle in the market,
At some of the votinrr l daces in
this city greenbacks circulated as
freely as ballots. Considering
the circumstances, the Democracy
have made a noble fight, and have
done even better than could have
been reasonably expected. They
have cast a majority of the hon
est vote of the State, and that in
spite of all the corrupt appliances
of the opposition. They have
fought the combined power of the
Grant administration, the Pacific
railroad, and the manufacturing
corporations ot this State and
Massachusetts, and against such
fearful odds have well-nigh tri
umphed. On a fair, free vote,
Xew Hampshire is Democratic to
day by 2,000 majority, and al
though the Democracy are disap
pointed and indignant, they have
no reason to be despondent,
o. -V o-
Amid the strife and bustle of
ceaseless labor and constant strug
gle amid the plans and calcula
tions for private fortune and public
growth amid the boasts of future
and financial success how many
pause to think of the never ending
stream that, year by year, flows
steadily from out our midst into
that silent city across the river?
There lies another population, from
us but not of us, quiet, peaceful,
resting, X'o police are needed
there, no physicians for body or
mind. With soft luted foliage
waiving above their heads, or soft
er Hakes down-dropping a mantle
of purest white, they f.'ar no theft
or wrong, but sleep" in silence un
disturbed. There is no Deed for
impatient longing to share their
caltii repose, tin in good season
Time will bear us all, upon the
mighty current that beats against
the shores of etti-nity'o domain
lust might not an occasional pause
for contemplation of this common
goal, bring softer thoughts and
broader charity? Might not an
hour, g'p-en now and then to mem
ory or to thought of the inevitable,
go far to smooth our path in life
and tend to soften the acerbities of
the struggle all too bitter in anv
event which lies between each
one and final rest?
Ben Holladay vs. The Farmers and
From the Oregon Farmer.
The individual who invests Ids money
in the construction of a railroad, or in
steamships to navigate the sea. or in
steamboats to ply upon our rivers, is en
titled to a fair return on the money thus
invested, and as much as Oie farmer to
a reasonable profit on his year's work, or
the mechanic to wages that will place
him. with ordinary economy, beyond the
reach of want. But when the owner ol
the railroad, or steamship, or steamboat,
adds a single cent per pound more on
rates of transportation than is equitable
and just, the man that produces and the
mechanic stiller to just that, extent; the
one cent per pound is taken from the
workhigman's pocket without any equiv
alent, and placed in the pocket of the
owner of the lines of transportation to
enrich him. With reasonable charges for
transportation, the farmers ot Oregon
would be enabled to place their surplus
crop in San Francisco. New York, or
English market, and successfully compete
vviln grain growers of other sec ions, and
would realize enough to give them en
couragement and facilities o make im
provements on their cuhivation uniil the
"State would produce a hundred fold
above what it now does. Without these
reasonable charges we are deprived of a
market, and we must stand idly by and
witness our farms go to wreck, or at least
remain unimproved, and see our lands
and slock depreciate in value. Our chil
dren must remain uneducated, because
v.e have not the means with which to ed
ucate them. Instead of prosperity ami
happiness to encourage ;is on to a bright
future, want and misery stare us in the
lace, and promise nothing for the long
days of toil expended in producing ma
terial to enrich this nabob that, carries
it to market, and the farmer sinks to a
state of vassalage or serfdom not unlike
those toilers in India for the Brush Last
In the Willamette valley we have two
lines of railroad one on the east and one
on ihe west side of the river, and one
steamboat transportation company, all
owned by one man. Owing to the great
cost of railroads, no one will bnild an
opposition; and owing to the falls of the
Willamette at. Oregon City, no one can
run an opposition to his steamboat line,
without great pecuniary Joss. Instead
of a gradual reduction in charges for
freight on these lines as the amount in
creases, the thumbscrew of this monopoly
is gradually being tightened on the peo
ple, and their prosperity sapped where
gain should be derived. The coolest
piece of impudence ou record is that the
tools ol this monopoly suouid assure the
people that the charges for transportation
now are lower than when Mr. Holladay
look charge of the People's Transporta
tion Company! Mr. llolladay's paper
(Ihe Z(ef)"has taken some pains to ex
amine Mr. llolladay's tatilfs, and has com
pared them with those of the People's
Transportation Company, and asserts
Umt treiyh', is carried for luss money
now than ever before. " Such an asser
tion coming from Mr. Holladay is quite
natural. It is not expected that he or his
paper will tell the people that he is charg
ing them more for freight now than they
were paying before, lie has got too old a
!i:ianc:al head for that. Put we make the
assertion, unqualifiedly . is oil Ihe charges on.
Hie W'ilbimeUe river to Porlbwd. are ye'iter
(ii'ia btore. Mr. lli!iu.bty enne to the Stule.
(Out before ijroHiid cts brvh en for t niU
rond ! Mr. llolladay's paper may cry
out that the tat ill is lower, but the .svV
pers, the men who pay he bills, tell us
that charges are at least fifty ccd.s i ton
more than when the People's Transporta
tion Company had the carrying trade on
tlio river, We care not what .Mr. llol
laday's liiriff is, but. Cradgrind iike, we
want, those' facts contained in the dmnjes
for freight made by the monopoly, paid
by our merchants and shippers, and litti
allv coming out of the pockets of our
farmers and working men.
We desire to create no undue prejudice
against Mr. Holladay. AU we ask is
justice between the carrier and the produc
er. We wish to cause trie wot kinsmen to
maturely reflect on their situation, and
arrive at a candid conclusion. They have
seen the Legislature corrupted, and the
members bribed; the ninety thousind
acres of land intended for an Agricultur
al College thrown away; and the people's
school money appropriated, by the Leg
islature, for the construction of locks
at the falls of the Willamette. But
they can now afford to let Mr. Holla
day get control of the nest Legislature,
and by the passage of - a lew littie bills."
become the owner of those improvements
which the people's school money has made,
and seal the navagalion of the Willam
ette river to all others except himself, and
thus f ive as complete a monopoly as the
world ever saw? Can Ihe working men
afford to let this one man get rich from
exactions that are unjust, and become op
ulent on he toil that commences at early
dawn and ends only7 with the going down
of the sun ?
Thure is but one way to avert this evil,
(or we might say. calamity.) Acts pass
ed by the next Legsslature will seal the
destiny of this valley, either for good or
bad. If the bribery of four years ago
is successfully repeated by the coming
Legislature, the most powerful t.de-cope
planted on the top of Mount Hood could
not. in ten yeais lrom this time, discover
a successful and prosperous farmer in
Oregon, except perhaps Mr. Holladay
himself, as proptietor of his. -little farm,"'
coveting the entire Willamette valley.
More Radical Rascality.
The Radicals have a majority in
the Illinois Legislature, and that
State is to be devided into nine
teen Congressional districts, of
which fifteen Congressional dis
tricts, of are Republican and four
Democratic, The vote for Con
or rests mam at largo at the last elec
tion in that State shows that the
Democrats polled 110,171 votes
and the Republicans 137,131,
Thus, while the Democrats cast
45, $5 per cent of the vote, they
aie not allowed one-fourth of the
Representatives in Congress. This
is a fact to be borne in mind.
Saws. A Warsaw reporter saw
a war among the wives and wid
ows of Warsaw, and remarks that
"of all the wars we ever saw, we
never saw a war like the war we
saw among the wives and widows
The Cincinnati Covcntion A Silly
Plot and Foolish Alarm.
From the New York World.
lie it understood that the atti
tude of Democrats towards the
Cincinnati Convention is that of
spectators. We do not propose to
"meddle or make" in this intestine
Republican quarrel. We watch it
with interest, as we do everything
which bears upon national politics;
but we recognize the. f'm-t that
Democrats are outsiders, and that
our proper role is to ''wait and
watch." The apt and happy phrase
of the German minister of foreign
affairs in the late Franco-Prussian
war, very exactly .1efines our posi
tion respecting the Cincinnati Con
vention. He spoke of a "'benevo
lent neutrality;" and in the present
quarrel between the two wings of
the Republican party, we wish it
to be understerstood that our atti
tude is that of benevolent neutrali
ty towards the Cincinnati move
ment. If the Cincinnati Conven
tion shall prove to be wise and
courageous, we have no doubt that
the country will support it and
make it victorious.
The partisans of Grant dread
the Cincinnati Convention, and
they have hit upon a cunning
plan for nuHifyi'i'g its influence.
They propose to pack it with crea
tures ami tools of Grant. As it is
to be what is called a mass con
vention, that is to say, as no for
mal credentials are to be required
of the delegates, the Grant people
think it wilt be an easy matter to
pack the Convention and make it
a Grant demonstration. If the
partisans of the President should
till the hall in which the Cincinnati
Convention meets with their own
creatures, they might nominate
Grant by acclamation, and make
the whole movement ridiculous.
There are many reasons for suppos
ing that thty have such a plot in
contemplation. For example, the
following extract from an editorial
in yesterday's Herald, shows what
is in the wind :
"What the friends of Grant
should do is to go to Cincinnati.
We are told it is to be a 'confer
ence' of Republicans. Well, if it
is to be a 'conference,' let the Re
publicans atUnd in a body. There
is no reason why it should not bu
a full conference. Let Came ion
and Morton, and Carpenter and
Conkling, and the rest of the lead
ers, with their followers, go to Cin
cinnati and 'confer.' It will do
them no harm. The Queen City
of the West is noted for its beauty,
its hospitaiily, its delicate native
wines, and corn-fed pork and bel
ligerent newspapers. Let there be
a fair 'conference,' with the party
fully represented. Mr. Sumner
can make his oration, Mr. Schurz
can repeat his devotion to that
German government which was
anxious to hang him twenty years
ago, Mr. Fenton can shake hands
with everybody, Mr. Greeley can
tell what lie knows about farming,
Mr. Trumbull can recite his exper
iences as a politician and his con
versation two y;ars ago and the
Herald will see that the orations
and debates are well reported.
The conference over, nothing will
remain but for the 'conference' to
take the sense of the convention,
nominate Ulysses S. Grant for re
election. This will be a good
ending for Cincinnati, a good be
ginning for Philadelphia, and an
auspicious opening of what promis
es to be the most exciting and im
portant canvass since that of 'Tip
pecanoe and Tyler too,' over thirty
This a hopeful scheme for revers
ing the guns of the Cincinnati
Convention and turning that move
ment into a Jiaaeo, The plot has
leaked out in other quarters, and
the Tribune thinks it so serious
that it felt impelled, yesterday, to
utter the following protest:
''The Federal otiice-holders have
called their convention to meet at
Philadelphia in June. Xo one
purposes to disturb or interfere
witn them. They have even com
plained that the editor of this jour
nal did not sign their call, in-ist ing
that this would have been only a
formal or ministerial act; thoagh,
had he signed, they would at once
have argued that his signature
bound him to abide by the result
of that convention. We trust no
one will attend that gathering who
has not fully made up his mind to
let the present incumbents have
another four years' lease of office
" Rut the Cincinnati Convention
is none of their affair. They did
not call it; they are not invited;
their presence is not desired. Let
them mind their own business and
run their own machine,
"Yet it is plain, from the forego
ing extract, that they had formed
a plot to surprise and capture the
Cincinnati Convention, and are
chagrined that the opportunity is
not to be afforded them. They
may do as they will at Philadelphia;
but they cannot have their way at
It seems to us quite superfluous
to warn off the Grant men, in this
emphatic manner, from their plot
to pack and control the Cincinnati
Convention. It will require but a
moderate amount of practical skill
to frustrate such a mana'uvre.
The Cincinnati Convention cannot
be packed with Grant's satellites
without the most foolish negli
gence on the part of the Liberal
Republicans. The means of pre
vention are as simple as they arc !
The hall in which the Cincinnati
Convention is held must be
engaged beforehand, ami will
be under the the control of those
who become responsible for the
rent. They can admit or exclude
whom they please, ami nobodv
can question their legal right. This
rightful control over the hall is a
complete guarantee against a con
vention being packed by Grant's
partisans, unless the anti-Grant
men are inexcusably stupid. Hav
ing engaged the hall, and havinur
thereby acquired the right to ad
mit or exclude whom they please,
the Liberal Republicans car. easily
head off the plot to pack the Con
vention with Grant's friends. The
interest excited by the occasion
will bring together ten times as
many as could get inside of any
hall in Cincinnati, and it will ac
cordingly be necessary to admit
people only on tickets. If tickets
are given to Grant men, it will be
the fault of the lessees of the hall.
They will naturally give, each day,
tickets of three kinds: delegates'
tickets for the members of the Con
vention, reporters' tickets for mem
bers of the ress, ami spectators'
tickets. Only those holding dele
gats' tickets can participate in the
proceedings; and we do not see
liow partisans of Grant can get
such tickets, if the affair is well
managed. For example: suppos
ing Mr. Greeley and Mr. Fenton to
be present at Cincinnati a day or
two in advance of the Convention,
they would know every person
present from the State of Xew
York, and could decide at once
whether he was a reformer or a
Grant man. Xo tickets of admis
sion would be given to Xew York
delegates who were not indorsed
and vouched for by Mr. Greeley or
his known friends. And the same
respecting Missouri and all the
other States. If Messrs. Schtitz
and Rrown are present from Mis
souri, they can easily divide the
sheep from the goats in pretended
delegations from that State, and
prevent the admission to the Con
vention of men who are not acting
in good faith. The well-known
and recognized leaders from each
State can be trusted to decide who
are their friends; and tickets of
admission should be given only to
members properly endorsed by the
anti-Grant chiefs of their respect
ive States.. This simple and ob
vious expedient will preclude all
possibility of packing the Conven
tion with partisans of Grant, and ;
insure for its proceedings the re
spect due to deliberations of earn
est, sincere men. The Cincinnati
Convention cannot be packed ; and
Democrats look forward to its pro
ceedings, with mingled solicitude
The Sin of lion-owing1 Trouble.
r,Y DE "WITT T.VUI.KGE,
Such a habit of heart ami mind
is wrong, because it puts one into
a despondency that ill tits him for
duty. I planted two rose bushes in
mv garden; the one thriving beau
tiful the other perished. I found
the dead one on the shady side of
the house. Our dispositions, like
our plants, need sunshine. Fxpec
tency of repulse is the cause of
many secular and religious failures.
Fear of bankruptcy has uptorn
many a fine business, and sent the
man dodging among the noted
shavers. Fear of slander and
abuse has often invited ai! the lean
beaked vultures of back-biting.
Many of the misfortunes of life,
like liycnas, flee if you courageous
ly meet them. How poorly pre
pared for religious duty is a man
who sits down under the gloom of
expected misfortunes If he prays,
he says: "I do not think I shall
be answered." If he gives, he
says: ''I expect they will steal the
money." Helen Chalmers told me
that her father, Thomas Chalmers,
in the darkest hour of the history
of the f ree church in Scotland, and
when the woes of the land seemed
to weigh upon his heart, said to
his children, '"Come, let us go out
and play ball or fly kite," and the
only difficulty in the play was that
the children could not keep tip
with their father. The McCheynes
ami the Sommertiels of the church
who did the most good, cultivated
sunshine. Away with the horrors.
The j' di-til poison; they dig
graves; and if they could climb so
high, they would drown the re
joicings of heaven with gobs and
A Horrible Story.
AI.ONK SICK FORTY DAYS WITHOUT t IHE,
AND FIITKEX WITHOUT FOOI OR WATElt.
From the Menasha (Wis.) Press, March 9:h.
An occurrence which makes the
blood freeze within the veins of the
reader, came to light, last Monday,
over in Clifton, Calumet Countv,
Wis. Thomas Downing, who for
some tone has lived alone in a
small shanty, back from any road,
over in that locality, and quaried
stone for a livelihood, was taken
violently sick at his home, on the
22d of January, with billions fever,
and was confined to his bed from
that time until Monday, March 4,
During the long weary days of his
illness no one called ; no one to
h-ud a helping hand in administer
ing to the wants of the sufferer,
and all because the location ot his
residence was so secluded that he
had been missed from his daily
round of toil. Last Monday, how
ever, came the good Samaritan.
A gentleman who had sold Mr.
Downing a quantity of butter last
Pall called at his resilience on
Monday to make a collection on
the same. Upon approaching ihe
house there were no visible signs
of lite, but from the interior eman
ated pitiful wails that were most
harrowing to the soul. An en
trance was forced, and the suffering
man found on his bed with boots
and clothes on, in which condition
he had passed the length of time
above stated, without food or wa
ter. In this dying condition he
was lifted from his cot, conveyed
to the house of a near neighbor,
medical aid at once summoned,
and, at this writing lie is pro
nounced in a fair way to recover.
This certainly is a most singular
case, which can be better imagined
than described, and if Thomas is
permitted by the gods to rally
from his afflictions he will be justi
fied in ad vocating, to the best of
his ability, the blessedness of the
"Wendell Phillips on Orant.
We find a circumstantial account
m one of our Republican exchang
es of an interview with that rug
ged Ishmuelite, Wendell Phillips,
from which we venture on an ex
Grant's chief concern says Mr.
Phillips, appears to be money
making. Q. Do you think lie makes
money in a corrupt way ?
A. i shouldn't like to say that;
but he has managed to make some
seven or eight hundred thousand
dollars during his administration,
ami lie thinks he has not enough
yet. A friend of mine residing in
Xew York, who was until very
recently a very warm admirer of
Gene al Grant, stated to me that
luring a conversation with him
the President had disgusted him
by remarking that he did not
think his (Grant's) friends had yet
sufficiently rewarded him for the
services he had rendered them and
the sacrifices lie had made the re
mark, as my friend took it, being
a strong hint for more presents.
Q. Does Grant really desire to
occupy the Presidential chair an
A. He has but two aspirations
re-election and another million.
Q. In case of the nom'u a ion
of Grant, is it likely that Sumner,
who is now opposed to him, will
supper; him use his influence for
him during the campaign?
A. Mr. Sumner will not under
any circumstances support Gener
al Grant; he entertains the most
contemptuous opinion of him.
During quite a recent, con vcrsat ion
I had with him at Washington.
Mr. Stunner said that the President
was the most ignorant orrapt,
di 'fill on est man living! If there
was no other choice, Mr. Sumner
would rather not vote at all than
vote for Grant.
Once Yai.ua ulk. A handsome
young gentleman walked into the
Adams Express office the other
day, ami desired to express a pack
age of letters to a lady, to whom
he desired to return them. "What
tire they worth?" asked the clerk,
who, in making out his account
desired to know what was the risk.
The young man hesitated a mo
ment, then clearing his throat from
a certain huskiness, replied : ''Well,
can't say exactly, but a few
weeks ago I thought they were
worth about four hundred thousand
The Size. An ignorant oil-merchant,
on being asked how large
an advertisement he wanted in a
certain newspaper, replied that
they might "put in about three
pints of type."
m m 9 .
Saved his Life. A Kansas Cit y
man who blew out the gas before
retiring saved his life by rushing
down to the office of the hotel ami
inquiring if there was "a glue lac
torv next a
Mayorality on Small-Pox
Huntington, away off in' In
diana, is blessed with a Mayor
whose wisdom and energy deserve
a wider field for their exercise.
Small-pox threatening an epid&nio
visitation in his bailiwick, his Hon
or has issued a proclamation "En
joining general vaccination?" Xot
a bit of it. "Directing the strict
isolation of all patients with the
dist-ase?" Xo; but .decreeing flog
ging and imprisonment for any
person who shall dare to go into
any public street after having been
exposed to the contagion. Tie
trifling objection that people aro
frequently exposed to contagion
without their knowledge cannot
of course be allowed to si and in
the way of this enactment, for it is
an axiom in law that ignorance is
no excuse for evil-doing ; but where
such extreme precaution is deemed
necessary against contracting the
dreaded malady there are other
difiicuh ies harder to lie overcome.
The officer who arrested an infect
ed wayfarer, the justice before
whom the prisoner is brought, and
the executioner who inflicts "the
lashes ordered will thereby expose
themselves to contagion, and will
consequently be obliged either to
inmure themselves in "immediate
privacy or to flog one another in
public, and the time must ultimate
ly arrive when all the inhabitants
of the place will be in prison, with
the exception of sthose who con
stantly remain within their own
doors, and the Mayor himself, who
will walk the streets in solitary
dignity, like a Crusoe without a
Friday, a Zimmerman with every
w"sh gratified. "Rut when infect
ed persons who are too dangerous
to be permitted m the open air are
sent to jail what on eatth is to be
done with the other prisoners?"
That, dear madam, is a question,
which his Honor has not yet deign
ed to solve. "Rut won't the prison
be a perfect nest ?" Yes, a May
Some of Josh Killing's Moral Precepts
Forgiving our enemys has the
same refreshing effeckt upon our
souls as it dus to confess our sins.
What a lamentable cuss man is
he pitys his neighbors misfor
tunes bi calling them judgments
Good Breeding iz the art of
avoiding familiarity, and at the
same time making the company
satisfied with you and pleased
Tew be happy take tiling as
they cum, and let th-Pm go jist as
It takes a great deal of money
to make a man rich but it don't tako
but little virtue.
It iz the little things of this
world that plague us.
What an agreeable world this
would be tew live in if we could
pump all the pride and selfishness
out out of it! It would improve
it as much as taking the lire and
brimstone out of the other world.
Don't mistake pleznre for happi
ness; it is iutirely a different breed
of dogs; there is exqnizit plezure
in happiness there is a great deal
of happiness that has no pleasure
Experience has effect on most
men that age has on a goose it
makes them tuher.
iOV I 1 1 LI It II . O t- m-liv I ai
ly places what- the wimmen meGt
to rip and so up the neighbor
hood. It takes a smart man to conceal
from others what he don't kno.
A lazy man always works hard
er than a bizzy one the battiest
work I kno ov is to grunt it s
harder to pet still and fight flies
then to get up and escape from
The man who controls hiz pa
shuns sits at the helm ov hiz ship.
It is very difficult to kalkulato
upon success, unless a man set? up
for a phool in this department I
have known hundreds to succeed,
contrarj' to their expectations.
' B- "
Any Time." I'd give anything
to hear Ole Bull," said an tip coun
try lass to her lover one evening,
"Well," answered he, "dad's got G
an old brindle chap, and you can
hear him beller a'most any vimu
Sokrv. A young lady of In
dianapolis was very sorry that her
wedding, which was to take place
at the same hour, would prevent
her attending her sister's funeral.
Pketty. A Western girl who
has been well brought up, knock
ed down every man that kissed
her and sh is so pretty that half
the' married men in town have
Before. An Irishman once
bought a pair of boots and they
were too small. He said : "Faith,
I shall have to wear them thray or
four times before I can get them