Heppner gazette. (Heppner, Morrow County, Or.) 1892-1912, April 13, 1911, Image 3

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Heppner gazette., April 13, 1911, Image 3

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Newspaper Page TextFLF ITL Sarsaparilla By virtue of its unequaled-blood-purifying, nerve-stength-ering, stomach-toning, appetite-restoring properties, is the one Great Spring Medicine. Get It today in usual liquid form or tablets called Sarsatabs. 100 Doses II. Unreasonable. "Come along to bod, BthoL I'm sure you wouldn't like to keep the Lord up all night. Just to listen to you." the keystone to health IhostetterFsI I STOMACH I 1 BITTERS I The Bitters is a boon to those- in convalescence when a tonic and strength maker is needed. Try it and see. - A word to the wise is sufficient .IP anc3 MODEL CURIOUS TO KNOW HUSBAND SMOKED IN PARLOR Good Advice. We should all strive to endure our troubles as oheerfully as we endure those of our friends. CHANGE IN WOMAN'S LIFE Made Safe by Lydia E. Pinkharn's Vegetable Compound. Oraniteville. Vt "I was nassino through the Change of Life and suffered 1 1 r o m nervousness and other annoying (symptoms, and I jean truly say that Lydia js. rinkham a Vegetable Com- pound lias proved 1 worth mountains of Isold to nie, as it jrestored my health and strength. 1 flnever forget to tell my friends what JLyiia E. l'inkliam't Vegetable Compound lias done for me during this trying period. Complete restoration to health means so much to me that for t' 1 sake of other suffer ing women I am willing to make my trouble public so you may publish this letter." M its. CirAS. JJahclay, U.r.D., Uraniteville, Vt. "Ko other medicine for woman's ills has received such wide-spread and un qualified endorsement. jS'o other med icine we know of has such a record of cures as has Lydia E. Pinkhaui'a Vegetable Compound. , Tor more thaa 30 years it has been ruring woman's ills such as iiillamma tion, ulceration, tibroid tumors, irreg ularities, periodic pains and nervous prostration, and it is unequalled for carrying women safely through the period of change of life. Mrs. Pinklinm, at Lynn, Mass., Invites all sick women to writfl lier for ad v ire. I ler advice is f re& 1 1 aaa anvuj s iicipiiu. Visitor Is Finally Enlightened on Rea on for Breach of Discipline Coat Was Afire. I The visitor sniffed. "Excuse me, dear," she said, "but what a smell of emoke there is In this room! You surely don't allow your husband to smoke la the drawing room?" "Well, not as a rule," replied her hostess, "but this morning " "My dear," exclaimed the visitor, 'you should never make exceptions in ases like this. I never do. My Fred dy never smokes In our drawing room an any consideration whatever." "Yes," began the young wife, "but It "Nonsense, darling! There are no buts' at all! In the first place, It's for the sake of discipline. In the second, the ashes absolutely ruin one's car pets. And as for the thick air Poof!" "I quite agree, sweet!" exclaimed the lectured one, spiritedly, getting In a word at last. "But this morning my husband simply had to smoke." "Indeed!" said the visitor, raising her eyebrows. "And why?" "Because," retorted her hostess, "his coat was on fire!" Tom Browne, Celebrated English At tlst. Meets Suspicious Negro Glass Chewer. Torn Browne, the celebrated English humorous artlBt, may be said to have had no education whatever in draw ing. He educated himself, What he saw he drew, and his genius made it a picture. He did go to an art school at Nottingham for a couple of terms, and it was a good school in its way. Anyhow, he grew tired of the cut-and-drled methods obtaining there of the restraint, as be once put It to me and so with about a dozen other would-be artists be took a room over some stables and there drew and painted from "life." They took it in turns to procure models a tramp, a newspaper boy, a flower seller, any body who wanted to earn a quarter served their purpose. One night Tom, scouring the neigh borhood for a subject, lighted on a negro who earned a living by chewing glass In public houses. This nice gea tleman was asked if he would come to the loft to be painted. He looked at Browne earnestly for some moments and, evidently laboring under the impression that the natural hue of bis body was to be altered, he demanded: "Will it come off, sab?' LOOKS AFTER THE PENNIES Higher and Fewer. "How much is a lower berth?" ask ed the man in front of the Pullman of fice window. . "Five dollars," replied the man be alnd. "And how much Is an upper?" "Four dollars." "Then the higher berths are lower "Yes, sir." "And the lower berths are higher?" "Exactly." "Well. I'll take a lower berth ii they're higher." "I'm sorry, but I have no lowei berths left" "Got an upper?" y "Yes." ' ) "But these are lower?" "Sure." "Well, then, the higher the fewer. -Yonkers Statesman. Shake Into Your Shoes Allen's Foot-Ease, a powder for the feet. It cures painful, swollen, smarting, sweating feet. Make new shoes easy. Sold by all DniirKistaandShcx Stores. Don't accept any substitute. Sample FREJi Addr A . s. ritntv). I,o Roy, N. X, Sand and Germs. Pretty ideas don't always appeal to the experts in hygiene. Kissing, for example, is dangerous, and even that sand provided for children in the parks is not so Innocent as it looks. The sand-hopper, with which children are so familiar on the real seashore, is replaced, according to the gloomy experts, by another kind of hopper The sand, in a word, when the chil dren have played architects with it for a time adds crittlness to grlttiness. This Is not necessarily a reflection on the children or the children's parents, for sand, like loose hay and straw, seems to produce crlts out of no where. But, after all, sand can be re newed at small cost, and if the econo mists 6hout too loud let them be in vited to take the old sand. It will be a good and witless after that as when it was new. I.ondon Chronicle, Poor Baby. Nurse, has the baby had a pow der?" "Yes, ma'am." "And those hpyophosphites?" "Yes, ma'am." "And the magnesia?" "Yes, ma'am." "Did you put a poultice on back?" "Yes, ma'am." "And cold compress on his chest?" "Yes, ma'am." "And he's no better?" "No, ma'am." "How strange! I think we hac1 better send for the doctor." his SHE'D MAKE HIM PROPOSE. The Matter Settled. Mr. Lately Married "But, dearest, I thought we had planned to go to the opera this evening?" Mrs. Ditto "Yes love; but I have changed our minds." Plirk. Without Alcohol A Strong Tonic Vithout Alcohol A Body Builder Without Alcohol A Blood Purifier Vithouf Alcohol A Great Alterative Without Alcohol A Doctor's Medicine Without Alcohol Aver's Sarstparilla Without Alcohol A W publish our formula ijers W. b.nl.h ihfll from our modiolus. Wo urro yo to oon.u it ;oar doctor Ayer's Pills are !iver pills. They act directly on the liver, make more bile secreted. This is why they ar so valu able in constipation, biliousness, dys pepsia, sick-headache. Ask your doctor if be knows a better laxative pill. Mill, by U.. J. C. Asr Co., Low.U. I' H I ' ' 3 4a ws?- Binks Is it hard to propose to i girl? Blinks Depends on the girl. Binks How so? Blinks If she has been out severa' seasons it is hard not to." The Woman's Way. "Many a married man who might make a fortune is handicapped be cause his 'wife demands too much ol his attention." "That's right Just as soon as for tune begins to flirt with him his wifi gets Jealous." Catholic Standard anf Times. TRY MURINE EYE REMEDY tor Red, Weak, Weary, Watery Eyes and Granulated Eyelids. Murine Doesn't Smart Soothes Eye Pain. Druggists Sell Murine Eye Remedy, Liquid, 25c, 50c, fl.00. Murine Eye Salve ia Aseptic Tubes, 25c, $1.00. Eye Books and Eye Advice Free by Mail. Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago. ha vi Failed to Please. "Yes," said Mrs. Proppln, "I bad 13 cooks In three months." "Oh you surely don't mean that,' rejoined Mrs. Athome. "It's the truth," replied Mrs. Drop Inn, with a deep sigh, "and what li more, I didn't please any of them.' It Drew Trade. Friend Why do you have such mis spelled and tingrammatlcal signs it your front window? Sharp Tradesman People think Tn a dunce ana come in to swindle rut Trade's Just booming. The Magnetic Pol. The north magnetic pole has been actually located at 70 degrees and 6 minutes north latitude and 96 degrees 46 minutes longitude. The south mag netic pole has not yet been located, but It is believed to be about 73 de grees south latitude and 150 east longitude. It is known, however that the' two magnetic poles do not lie at the extremities of a diameter of the earth. Thousands of country people know the vain- of llnmlins Wizard Oil, the liest I'm m i I v medicine in case oi accident or sud den illness. For the safety of your family buy a bottle now. Sarcastic Juoge. Baron Maule, in one of his sarcastic moods, addressed from the bench a barrister friend of mine thus: "Mr. Barker, could you not state your facts in some kind of order? Chrono logical Is the best, but If you cannot manage that, try some other; alpha betical, if you please." Sir Francis H. Doyle.."" '-v -" Large Irrigation Project. An eight million dollar Irrigation project about being completed in New South Wales, will benefit 1,500, 000 acres of land and offer settlement opportunities to 70 000 persons. Dr. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets regulate and invigorate, stomach, liver and bow els. Sugar-coated, tiny granules, easy to take as candy. Woman and the Farm. In defining woman's relation to the life of the farm, one needs but little reflection to become aware of the all pervading quality of that relationship. Just as the monarch of France, when asked to define the state, exclaimed, The state; I am the state." So might the farmer's wife, when questioned as to the life of the farm, respond, "I am the life 6f the farm." 6a ve the Coal Dust. Coal dust should never be wasted. Have a special galvanized scuttle for It and mil sufficient water with it to make it quite moist. When a Are is rtloa and clear bank It up with this coal dust and It will last for hours Where this Is don ther la no ac cumulation of coal dust so common la some hou,','', Believed Location of Ark. On a farm on the hill of Tara, Meath, Ireland, which is announced to be sold, is the fort. Rath of the Sy nods, under which tradition says the Ark of the Covenant lies burled. A former owner commenced excavations In search of the Ark but only discov ered some gold coins and ancienf weapons. Good Stories Told of Harry Lauder, the Popular Little Scotch Comedian. Harry Lauder, little Scotch comedl. an, the greatest exponent of slinon pure thrift Broadway ever knew, the man who never let a guilty penny escape, has been "separated, disentangled," as it were, and as a result he is out Just $25,000. A Boston financial Napoleon Induced the wee Scot to Invest $25,000 in copper stock which is worthless Getting $25,000 from Lauder brands him as a youth deserving of the tltla Napoleon of Finance. To illustrate Lauder's frugality this story is told of how Gus Elen, a Brit ish music hall favorite, once heard that Harry was saving more money than he (Elen) was saving. He went to Lauder's room to ask how he managed It. "Wait till I blow out the candle," said Lauder, "and I'll tell you." Another time, when Lauder was in New York he was in a wine-buying party at the Astor. Everybody but the Scot bought wine. When it came his turn to buy he sighed: "Well, boys," he said, "ifs my turn to treat Come along with me. I've got a fine bottle of old Scotch up in my room I brought it over with me." On another occasion he was with a drinking party, and instead of liquor he took cigars, for which those who treated him paid 50 cents apiece. Harry put all but one in his pocket He spent two hours smoking that one. After the drinking was over the little comedian went to the cigar counter ana saia to tee man in charge: I say, man, wud ye mind glvln' me 10-cent cigars for these 50-cent ones?" The exchange was made and Harry went to his room with five times as many cigars as he had at the start A Poor Weak Woman As she ia termed, will endure bravely and patiently agonies which a strong man would give way under. The fact is women are more patient than they ought to be under such troubles. Every woman ought to know that she may obtain the most experienced medical advice free of charge and in absolute confidence and privacy by writing to the World's Dispensary Medical Association, R. V. Pierce, M. D., President, Buffalo, N. Y. Dr. Pierce has been chief consulting physician of the Invalids' Hotel and Surgical Institute, of Buffalo, N. Y., for many yeara and haa had a wider practical nnerimr. in the treatment of women 'a diseases than any other physician in this country, lis medicines are world-famous for their astonishing efficacy. The. most perfect remedy ever devised for weak and dcli cute women is Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription. IT MAKES WEAK WOMEN STRONG, SICK WOMEN WELL. The many and varied symptoms of woman'a peculiar ailment are fully set forth in Plain English in the People's Medical Adviser (1008 pages), a newly revised and up-to-date Edition of which, cloth-bound, will be mailed free on receipt of 31 one-cent stamps to pay cost of mailing only. Address as cbove. t - Doctors Said He Would Die A Friend's Advice Saves Life How McKlnley Got a Job. Congressman 'Duncan McKlnley. the silver-tongued lame duck from Califor nia, who was defeated in his own dis trict last November while he was dis pensing Republican oratory in other parts of the country, was in the east right after election. He met President Taft in New York. "Awfully sorry you were defeated." said the president. "Yes, so am I," admitted the con gressman, with a tone that was as good as an affidavit. "But I am aot going out of public life." "That's good; what are you going to do?" asked the president. 'Don't know yet, but I'm goipg to have a position in the public service. I'm willing to leave that to you." The president laughed, and so did the congressman. The story goes that Mr. McKlnley filed on two or three good things that were found already preempted and finally got his eye on the collectorship of the port of San Francisco. He gets the Job and will remain in oubllc life. Washington Times, I wish to speak of the wonderful cure (hat I have received from yoi noted Swamp-Root, the great kidney and blad der cure. Last summer I was taken with severe pain in my back and sides. I could not breathe without difficulty and was nearly wild with the desire to urinate. as compelled to do so every ten minutes with the passage of pure blood with the urine. I tried all the different doctors from far and near, but they said it was no use to doctor as I would die anyway. I Mas at the end of my rope and was so miserable with pain and the thought that I must die that words cannot tell how I felt. One day a friend told me of the wonderful help she had received from Swamp Root. She gave me one of your pam phlets which I read and determined to try Swamp-Root. After taking half a bottle 1 felt better. Have now taken ten bottles and am well as I ever was thanks to Swamp-Root. I wish to tell all suffering people that have kidney liver or bladded trouble, that Dr. Kil mer's Swamp-Hoot is the best medicine on the market. All persons doubting this statement can write to me and I will answer them directly. Yours very truly, CLYDE F. CAMEHER, .Rosalia, Wash. Subscribed and sworn to before me this 23rd dav of July, 1909. VERNE TOWNE, Notary Public. m-y II 11 I mi i r mmi Dak Bungalows of India. The Dak bungalow of India Is a blessed institution for the weary Dak, as the natives call the traveler. He finds these little shelters dotted over many of the out-of-the-way parts of the country, generally not more than one long day's march apart. They mean warmth when one has been hilled to the bone by biting winds, or shelter from the driving rain and hail storms, the latter so common in north ern India that planters insure their crops against them, and so violent that both men and cattle are often killed by them. The bungalows usu ally consist of two bedrooms and a dining room, with rough outside build ings providing a kitchen and sheds for horses and coolies. After our life in the untrodden for ests of South America, it was camping de luxe. Mary Blair Beebe, in Har per's Magazine. Letter to Dr. Kilmer Co, Blnghamton, W. T. Prove What Swamp-Root Will Do for You Send to Dr. Kilmer & Co., Bingham ton, N. Y., for a sample bottle. It will convince anyone. You will also receive a booklet of valuable information, tell ing all about the kidneys and bladder. When writing be sure and mention this paper. For sale at all drng stores. Price fifty-cents and one-dollar. n 1 O. m BT ; book How to get well and kpep well." DR. H W. FREEZE, Nn.r..gisl. 308 Maduils Trial Bide. Perdud, Or. or I H. I Eccentric Work Basket There are workbags made of tur tles. Could anything be odder? And yet they are not unattractive, quer as they sound. The shell of the tur tle Is lined with some gay silk, and the tall Is pulled over and Inserted In the mouth, then used as a handle. They make nice sewing baskets, anj will undoubtedly arpeil to the lovera of the accentric. Wanted to Know. Tommy had been taken to church for the first time, and there was much about it that interested hlra. It was Just before the sermon that his curios ity got the better of his silence. "Muvver," he whispered. "Hush, dear," said his mother. "Wait until church Is over." "But, muvver, I want to know sum pin," said Tommy. . "Well, you must wait, dear," said his mother. "I'm afwaid I'll fordet, muvver," he pleaded. "Very well, then, what Is It?" said the good lady, bending down to catch the little chap's words. "What does dat minister wear his nightgown for. Ain't he got any py- Jamis?" asked Tommy. Harper'f Weekly. Growing Beet Sugar In England. Remarkable success has attended the efforts of growers of sugar beets In Herefordshire! England. A good high average for a crop is 15 tons to the acre of roots bearing 15 per cent of sugar. The Herefordshire farmers, in spite of rough and ready methods and small knowledge of the crop, grew up to 274 tons to the acre, with a sugar content of 19 per cent The purity of the sugar was eye'ontliv high. Moth? will find Mrs. Wlnslow's Soothing Syrup the bt st remed to Use fci their ciiiiiirea luring the teething period. HOWARD E. BfRTOir - Awarer and Chemlrt, Lemtviile, Colorudo. Specimen pricr.1 tiold. Silver, Lead, tl. OoM. Silver, 7jc; Gold, aUc: Zino or Copper, SI. Mulini? envelojte. s .d full pri( list ent on application. Control a-d rmpire vorksoj. Ucited. Reference: (Wboiuite(atJ)iuJ ilonk. AGENTS and SOLICITORS I have the great est seller out; newly patented article; carried in pocket. Ser tl 25c in stamp for sample to Pocket Door Lock Co., &i0 Mohawk Illdg., Portland, Oregon. MOHAIR wDLFInd Write Today for Prices THE H. F. NORTON CO. 313 and 315 Front St. PORTLAND, ORE. KODAKS AND KODAK SUPPLIES Write for eatalotruea and literature. Developing1 and printing-. Mail orders given prompt attention Portland rhoto fcupply Co. 149 Third Street PORTLAND. OREL f MOHAIR Send for prices and shipping tags. THEO. EEKNHE1M CO. 247 Ash St.. Portland, Ore. MOHAIR We want a" the """i cl'Ps IV1VSI IHIll grown in the Northwest. Ship us your clip or write for information. MULTNOMAH MOHAIR MILLS 712 Couch Birlrfini!. Portland, Or. The English Crisis. I Jason Blogg (of Pittsburg) Well, Hypatia, which of 'em have you con cluded to take, the Earl of Oldparlc or the Count Appogglatura? Miss Hy patia I'm going to await develop ments, pop. If the Earl loses his veto, maybe I'll take the Count. Londoa T'linrh. Waterproof Suitcases. "Straw matti-g suitcases and shop ping bags," says Woman's Home Com panion, "can be very much improved in looks and usefulness by a coat of cheap wagon viarnlsh, which makes them waterproof. A good wetting will generally spoil them, but the varnish causes them to shed water like a duck. This should be done once a year." PIUFLES "I tried all kinds of blood remedies which failed to do me any good, but I have found the right thing at last. My face was full of pimples and black-heads. After taking Cascarets they all left. I am continuing the use of them and recom mending them to my friends. I feel fine when. I rise in the morning. Hope t have a chance to ttcommcsd Cascarets." Fred C. Witica, 76 Elm St., Newark, N. J. Pleasant. Palatable. Potent. Taste Good. Do Good. Never Sicken. Weaken or GripL 10c 26c 50c Never sold in bulk. Tm ren ame tablet stamped C C C Guaranteed to cure or your money back. P N U No. 15 '11 WHKN writing; to advertisers please I uieution this paper. I Trying Times. "Doing well, young man, I see." "No; Just struggling along." "But that fine adding machine?" "A demonstrator left it on trial." "That new typewriter?" "An agent forced it on me for month." "At least those expensive cigars de note ready money." "No; I smoke ten and return the rest" On an Auto Ride. Sentimental Paughter Oh, father! Look! Isn't the dying day beautiful? Practical Parent (awakening from nap) What? Where is it? I didn't know we hit anything? Puck. . A Polite Explanation. "You used to send me candy and flowers," said Mr. Meekton's wife. "Yes, Henrietta: but you know. In those days I could do what I liked with my salary." "BETTER FOR MEN, WOMEN AND CHILDREN THAN CASTOR OH, SALTS.OR PILLS, AS IT SWEETENS AND CLEANSES THE SYSTEM MORE EFFICIENTLY AND IS FAR MORE PLEASANT TO TAKE. YRUPfFlGS-lIXIRENNA U IHfc. 1ULAL rAMlLY LAXATIVE, AS TSn ALWAYS BENEFICIAL IN ITS EFFECTS AND PERFECTLY SAFE AT ALL TIMES. CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO. in the Circfe. on event Package of the Genuine. 4 ALL RELIABLE DRUGGISTS SELL THE ORIGINAL AND CENU1NE WHEN CALLED FOR. ALTHOUGH THEY COULD MAKE A LARGER PROFIT BY SELLING INFERIOR PREPARA. TIONS, YET THEY PREFER TO SELL THE GENUINE. BECAUSE IT IS RIGHT TO DO SO AND FOR THE GOOD OF THEIR CUSTOMERS. WHEN IN MEED OF MEDICINES. SUCH DRUGGISTS ARE THE ONES TO DEAL WITH. AS YOUR LIFE OR HEALTH MAY AT SOME TIME DEPEND UPON THEIR SKILL AND RELIABILITY WHEN BUYING faiul VV1YII7 SJ -if!' tl HI ' Note tfio Full Name of tho Gornpant; 'and Vv'ivf'u -f Ml lJcfnt. of "i roMotkfi it i!' f 11 Kwmvwmnm, k, 'i.'f f I.J iift5 'inm'-ihMiC PRINTtD STRAIGHT ACROSS,NtR THE BO I KIM. AND IN THE CIRCLE. NEAR THE TOP OF EVERY PACKAGE, OF THE GENUINE. ONE SIZE ONLY, FOR SALE BY ALL LEADING DRUGGISTS. REGULAR PRICE SO. PtR BOTTLE., ,-,! mvtit nr. o DfXNil ' 'i :iHll Kt TK TtKi SYPI'P OF F1CS AND FHVR OF SFNVA IS THE ONLY PERFECT FAMILY LAXATIVE, BECAUSE IT IS THE ONE ktMUY WHICH ACTS IN A NATURAL, STRENCTHTNING WAY AND CLEANSES THE SYSTEM. WITHOUT UNPLEASANT AFTEREFFECTS AMI WITHOUT IRRITATING, DEBILITATING OR GRIPING. AND THEREFORE DOES NOT INTEKMKE IN ANY WAY WITH BUSINESS OR PLEASURE IT IS RECOMMLNDLD BY MILLIONS OF WELL. INFORMED FAMILIES, WHO KNOW OF ITS VALLE JROM PERSONAL USE. T3 GET ITS BFNEFICIAI. EFFECTS ALWAYS BUY THE GENUINE MANUFACTURED BY THE CALIFORNIA FIG SYR?"5 CO.