Heppner gazette., June 30, 1910, Image 2

Wand
OR
The Devil-Stick
By tha Author ot
"The Mystery of a Hansom Cb," Etc.
CHATTER XXII. (Continued.)
The door opened to admit Dr. Et
tvr.hi. Both the Major and the Cre?lo
f-tared at him in surprise, ns neither
for the moment could grasp the idea
that he had been bold enough to pre
sent himself before those whom ho
had so deeply wronged.
"Ah," said Etwald, as complacently
as ever, "I thought I should find you
here, Major; but I hardly expected to
see Mrs. Dallas."
"You villain!" cried that lady, start
ing from her seat. "Do you think I
want to see you after all the misery
3-ou have caused? Why, I refuse even
to remain In the same room with you!"
And with a furious gesture the Creole
swept past Etwald and out of the door,
which she banged loudly. Etwald look
ed at the door, shrugged his shoulders,
and turned politely to the Major.
"It is just as well she is gone," said
he, quietly. "It is better than our con
versation should be private."
"I wish to hold no conversation with
a scoundrel, sir!" cried Jen, purple
with rage. "I'll have you turned out
of the house."
"In that case you'll never hear what
I have come to tell you."
"What is that, sir?" demanded Jen.
in a calmer tone.
"The truth! My story is quite dif
ferent to that of Dido."
"David's w;as different also."
"I know It But my story the true
story differs even from David's. Will
you hear it, Major, or shall I leave
your house before I suffer the disgrace
of being kicked out?"
The Major considered for a few mo
ments before rfeplying. There was a
hinted mystery in the manner of Et
wald which puzzled him not a little.
Moreover, he wished to know the le
tual facts of the case, and now that
Dido had fled, Etwald was he only one
who could tell them. Acting- upon the3e
considerations, Jen sat down again in
his chair and sulkily gave Etwald per
mission to remain and explain. This
the doctor proceeded to do at once.
"As you are aware," said he, calmly,
"I escaped the charge of murder, and
very right, too, seeing that I was inno
cent of the crime. But as to the steal
ing of the body I am guilty. I am out
on bail, and must come up for trial
soon, on the charge that I spoke of.
However, I am not afraid, as I can de
rfend myself in a manner you little
dream of. But being out on bail, I
icame to see you."
"To tell me more lies."
"Td tell you the truth, my dear Ma
jor; and I assure you that the truth
will surprise you not a little. But, by
the way. Major Dido?"
"She has fled."
"I know it She was afraid of me."
"Hardly." replied Jen, a trifle spite
fully. "You have lost the Voodoo
Stone, remember."
"Yes. I was taken advantage of for
once In my life. A cunning woman,
that Dido. Sho got permission to see
me in prison, and to talk to me alone,
under the pretence of seeing me about
her evidence. Knowing that I could
compel her to do what I wished by
means of the Voodoo Stone, I saw her
with pleasure, as it was my intention
to put the words likely to get me off
to prove my innocence into he
mouth. However, while I was talking
to her, she suddenly produced a phial
of the devil-stick poison, and threw it
In my face. Of course, I instantly be
came unconscious, and It was then
that she wrenched the talisman off my
watch-chain."
"Is the poison so quick In its effects,
then?"
"I should think so," said Etwald,
coldly. "You saw how David fell in
court, after wounding his hand. I fe'.l
In prison quite as quickly, but as my
ekin was not scratched, and the drug
only took effect through the nostrils, I
recovered."
"And when you recovered?"
"The gaoler told me that Dido had
called him in, saying that I had faint
ed. While they were getting me round
Dido went off with the Voodoo Stone.
Those about the prison had no reason
to detain her, so she left. When
found the Voodoo Stone gone," added
Etwald, Impressively, "I knew that the
black wretch would give evidence
against me, and that the game was at
an end."
"You expected to be hanged?" sug
gested Jen.
"Well, no," replied the doctor, with
wonderful coolness. "I did not expect
that If the worst came to the worst,
J knew that I could protect myself;
tut I must admit tha he confession of
my counsel, Mr. Sarby, ook me some
what by surprise."
"Poor David!" sighed Jen, thinking
of the young man cut oft in the bloom
Of his youth.
"Poor David!" echoed Etwald, with
a sneer. "Foolish David, you might
say, to die for the sake of a woman."
"Yet you risked death for the same
woman."
"I risked danger for the woman's
fortune." retorted Etwald, with revolt
ing candor. "It was the money I want
ed. But dath, no, I did not risk that."
"I am not so sure of that. Etwald.
How did you know that David wouM
confess In so dramatic a fashion?"
"I did not know it. Major. As I said
before, his confession took me by sur
tiris". Still, s I Wiis innocent I knew
that I eouid not be hanged."
"Well." said Jen, growing weary of
this long - continued conversation,
which net-nu-d to lead to nothing, "ut
all events, you'll not escape a long
term of imprisonment"
"Why?" said Etwald, with an agree
able smile. "There are two opinions
about that. Mine is that I shall 50
free. Then," he added, coolly, "I In
tend to seek Barbadoes, and search for
of Sleep
that black witch in order to recover
the Voodoo Stone."
"I hops you'll get the change of go
lng; but I doubt It. However, if you
do get as far as the West Indies, you
rind friends there. Mrs. Dallas an
her daughter go back to their estates
in Barbadoes within the month."
"Really!" said Etwald, again. "Then
I may marry her after all."
"She won't have you."
"Oh, I think so.- I have a means of
compelling her to marry me."
Jen Jumped up with a scowl.
"I'm tired of your enigmas." ha cried
angrily. "What is it you wish to tell
me?"
"The name of the person who com
mitted the murder!"
"I know It David Sarby!"
"Not at all! He accused himself to
shield the real person!"
"To shield the assassin?" gasped
Jen, thunderstruck. "And who is the
assassin?"
"Can't you guess from his self-accu
sation? Why, the woman he loved!
"Isabella?"
"Exactly. Isabella Dallas, and none
other, killed your boy, Maurice."
CHAPTER XXIII.
"Isabella killed Maurice!" said Jen
pushing back his chair. "Impossible,
Doctor. You must be mistaken."
"I don't think so!" replied Etwald
dryly. "I saw her do it. So did ' Da
vid."
"You must be mistaken!" insisted
the Major once more. "David was in
New York on the night when the crime
was committeed."
"By his own confession in court,
David was in the grounds of Mrs. Dal
las on that night."
"Yes, yes. You are right!" said Jen,
In a bewildered tone. "Still, I cannot
believe that Isabella killed Maurice
She loved him dearly, and had no rea
son to murder him."
"None in the world. Yet she cer
tainly took his life. Coma. Major,
won't worry you any longer with in
quiries. Dido hypnotized the daugh
ter to commit the frime, as she had
willed the mother Vi steal the devil
stick. Isabella is absolutely ignorant
of what she did, and firmly believed
that I was the guilty person. Now, of
course, sha thinks David bjr his own
confession is the assassin."
"But David confessed himself guilty
to save her?"
"Of course; but Isabella does not
know that. Sha thinks and, on the
face of it, with reason that David
killed Maurice out of Jealousy."
"How was it David saw the crime
committed?"
"I shall explain," said Etwald. "Da
vid found out that Maurice was going
to meet Isabella that night, secretly.
in the grounds of Mrs. Dallas, near the
gate.- Determined to see the meeting,
and to learn if there was any hope for
him, he feigned a journey to New York
In order I to lull any suspicions which
Maurice might have that he was be
ing watched. Instead of going, how
ever, he concealed himself at a spot
where he could see the gates, which
opened on to the highway. Now," add
ed Etwald, with a side glance at the
Maior. "it so happened that I also
wished to see that meeting."
"How did you know It was about to
take place?"
"I learned the fact from Dido. Well,
I saw David in his place of conceal
ment, and guessed his reason for com
ing. Maurice appeared at the rendez
vons, and shortly afterwards Isabella,
under the hypnotic Influence, came
jo'.fci the avenue. In her hand sho
held the devil-stick, and came swiftly
towards Maurice. He, not understand
ing the deadly weapon with which she
was armed, came to meet her with
outstretched arms. She thrust the
devil-stick before her, and wounded
him in the palm of the hand. With a
cry he fell dead."
"Within the gates?" asked the Ma
jor, much agitated.
"Yes, within the gates," responded
Etwald. "When Isabella had struck
the blow, she dropped the devil-stick in
the grass where, if you remember, It
was found by Battersea. Then she re
turned to the house by the little path
which leads thereto through the sur
rounding trees. The body lay in the
bright moonlight, full in the center of
the path, not a stone s-throw from the
high-road. David and I rushed sim
ultaneously from our hiding-places,
and I explained hurriedly that the body
must not be found in the grounds. Hi
understood, and we carried the body on
to the road. Before we had time to
deliberate what was to be done, we
heard the noise of approaching foot
steps, and afraid both of us of being
accused of the crime, we fled. Then
you came down the road and discover
ed the corpse."
"Yes. I heard the poor lad's cry,"
said Jen, simply, "and I ran down at
once. You must have been very quick
in your movements. I wish both cf
you had been more open with me."
"I am afraid that would have been
impossible. Major," said Etwald, rising.
"You were so distracted over the death
of Maurice, and so unjust in your ha
tred of me, that it would have been
dangerous to trust you."
Am I unjust In my hatred of you?"
demanded Jen, getting on his feet "I
thir.k not Dr. Etwald. Your desire to
marry Isabella, or, rather, her fortune,
has been the cause of all these ills.
Dido was only your Instrument, whom
you compelled to work by means of the
Voodoo Stone. That she betrayed you
in the end wag your punishment I do
rot t lame her so much as I do you.
You alone are responsible for the death
of those two poor lads of mine."
Well, have It your own way," sail
Etwald, carelessly. "I am a scoundrel
' In your eyes, 1 tmre say; but IT yn
will permit me to see you to-morrow
at 11 o'olock, I shall bo able to prove
that I am not quite so black as you
have painted me."
"I never want to set eyes on you
again," said Jen, bluntly.
"Nor will you after mid-day to
morrow. But you will regret If you do
not grant me this interview. If you
are wise you will arrange to let me
come here to-morrow at 11, and meet
Mrs. Dallas and her daughter."
"Both of them will refuse to meet
you. You saw Mrs. Dallas to-day, how
she behaved."
"Like the fool she is," said the doc
tor. nuttlna- on his hat. "Well, I am
going. Will you see me to-morrow
morning?"
"Yes. I don't know what possible
things you can find to say to me after
this Interview; but, as you make such
a point of it, I'll see you."
"And ask Mrs. Dallas and her daugh
ter to be present"
"Yes. I'll try and get them to come."
Later on In the day Jen sent a lettet
to "The Wigwam," asking Mrs. Dallas
to come with her daughter the next
morning at 11 o'clock. He did not ex
plain that Dr. Etwald would be pres
ent, as he knew the temper of Mrs
Dallas. Whatever might be at stake,
even if it were to her own interest, sh
would refuse to meet the men towards
whom she bore so strong a hatred.
Therefore Jen decided to be diplomat
ic, and keep silent as to the visit of
Etwald. During the afternoon a nota
was brought to Jen, in which Mrs. Dal
las promised to come and to bring Isa
bella. At 11 o'clock next morning Mrs. Dal
las arrived with Isabella, the latter
looking wan and ill. Even had the
Major not promised to be silent, he
could not have brought himself to tell
the poor girl the truth at that moment.
After all, she was perfectly Innocent,
and had committed the crime unwit
tingly. Dido was the culprit, not Isa
bella; and the Major felt a profound
pity for the miserable girl, who had
been made a tool of by the unscrupu
lous negress and the evil-minded Et
wald. "Well, Major," said Mrs. Dallas, after
the first greetings were over, "what did
that wicked man say to you yester
day?" "He explained how my poor Maurice
was killed."
"Ah!" said Isabella, clasping her
hands, "I am sure that It was that ter
rible man who made David kill Mau
rice. Oh, if I had only met Maurice on
that night, I might have prevented the
quarrel.
"Did you meet Maurice, my dear?"
"Of course -not" replied Isabella, In
the most truthful manner. "I did not
leave the house, and Dido was with
me all the time. I expect Maurice was
waiting for me, and that David saw
him. No doubt they Quarreled, and
then the death took place. I had a
nervous headache, and Dido hypnotized
me. When I woke up it was too late
to see Maurice."
The Major had learned all that he
wished to know, and, not wishing to
pursue the subject, turned the conver
sation by explaining that Etwald was
coming In a few minutes. Mrs. Dallas
rose up In a cold fury.
"Did you ask me here to insult me,
Major?
'1 asked you here at the particular")
request 0 Dr. Etwald.'
vvny: vvnai can tie nave to say -o
my mother?" cried Isabella, in sur
prise.
"Miss Dallas, I know no more than
you do; nut he evidently desires to
make a clean breast of this whole mis
erable business."
T have heard quite enough about it,"
said Mrs. Dallas, marching towards tha
door, "and I refuse to meet that mon
ster of Iniquity!"
(To be continued.)
GIRLS AS VETERINAEIES.
They Have F.tnbllhel Free DUien-
urien, Where Animal Are Treated
It hasn't taken long for the story
of the free dispensary for animals to
get noised abroad. To the headquar
ters recently opened in this city now
goes daily, according to the Philadel
phia Record, a stream of visitors, some
with sick cats and dogs, others with
injured or ailing horses and seeking
professional aid for their family pet
or their four-footed fellow worker. At
the new dispensary, known as the
Caroline Earl White Free Dispensary
for Animals, all the dumb invalids
are given a welcome and in their turn
ministered to by the veterinary sur
geon who 1b Jn attendance.
But the most interesting feature of
this new work is that the services ot
the regular veterinary who is in at
tendance are not essential, for the wo
men themselves are ready to play
doctor to the sick animals and some
of them are as well qualified to do
so as any diploma veterinary from
the halls of surgical learning. Mrs.
Caroline White, the founder of the dis
pensary, has made a life study pf the
ailments of animals and during her
attendance at the dispensary she Is
ready at any time to treat a horse or
dog or cat brought there sick or In
jured.
'I doa't know whether a woman
veterinary surgeon is a rarity or not,"
said one of the ladies in attendance
at the dispensary, "but I can think
of few vocations that are more suit
able to women than that of minlster-
ng to the wants of dumb animals.
When we women see a horse brought
imping to the dispensary our hearts
go out to the poor thing and we are
ready to do any kindness in our pow
er to help the wounded one. What
ould be more appealing than the look
a the eyes of a norse or dog or cat
suffering agony and unable to help
itself? If we have any horror of blood
and wounds we soon overcome it when
those appealing eyes are turned upon
US.
A BiilnM Conference.
"The junior partner wants to see
ou right away," announced the book
keeper. "I guess it's the bounce for
ours."
Nix," responded the office boy. "He
only wants to find out what new play
ers have been signed." Washington
Herald
TAX OH MEN'S INCOMES.
Raw tha Drnatte Collection la EnffU
n acred In Great Britain,
The resolution authorizing the col
lection of income tax for the year
April 1, 1909-March 31, 1910, was
passed by the House of Commons last
night, the London Mall says. Through
out the country the. boards of commls
sloners are anxiously awaiting the in
structions of Somerset House, so that
they may begin work. The rates of
the new tax are:
Rates per pound,
. s. d
Unearned Income (dividend) 1 2
Earned Income up to 2,000
Earned income, f 2,000-3,000 1
All Income over 3.n00 I
AH income over 5,000, super-tax on
every pound over 8,000
The usual abatements apply to res!
dents in the United Kingdom up to
700 and an extra abatement of 10 is
allowed for every child under 16 from
incomes under 500.
All the demand notes are prepared
addressed and ready for delivery. The
moment they receive the word "Go,1
the collectors will issue them. The
surveyors will have neither the time
nor the inclination to allow much de
lay in payment. Somerset House may
decide to act instantly on the strength
of the House of Commons resolution or
may wait until the finance bill re
ceives the royal assent to-morrow
week. The latter course is generally
thought to be the more probable,
Thi3 is the time of the year at
which the collectors give the first turn
to the screw in the case of arrears
and as there are now some 23,500,000
to collect. Instead of about a tenth of
that figure, as usual at this period,
the turning of the screw will be em-
phatic. The powers of a surveyor are
drastic. If a man will not or does not
pay he will receive a curt demand for
the money within five or seven days,
with a threat of the usual proceedings
in default. If that proves ineffectual
the brokers may be put in under a
distress warrant, and if there are no
effects which can be seized the de
faulter will be marched off to prison
at once.
Mr. Lloyd George estimates that
330,000 has been irretrievably lost by
the delay in the collection of the tax.
Many commissioners and surveyors
are convinced that this figure is very
much understated. Some of them esti-
mate the inevitable loss in their own
districts at nearly 10 per cent of the
whole. There have been failures and
removals and disappearances of tax-
payers, and, although the state is pa
tient and persistent in these matters,
it is hopeless (say these experts) to
think that as much of the money will
be recovered as the chancellor seems
to contemplate.
Nobody has yet received a form
which provides for the claiming of
abatements in virtue of children un
der 16 years of age. When a man en
titled to such rebates receives his de
mand note he must either pay in full
and claim the rebate afterward or go
to a vast deal of trouble to get the
rebate allowed before he pays,
Supertax is to be paid not during
the year in which the Income is re
ceived, but In the year following it,
and persons liable to pay It for the
year ending March 31, 1910, must
make their returns by July 31. So
delicate and important will be the
work of adjusting this new tax that
the officials of Somerset House charged
with Its management have been in
structed to complete their annual holt
'.ays before the end of May.
Japanese Tent of Sladueu.
Recently at the Tokyo appeal court,
before Judge Miyamoto, a farmer
named Gisel Haseba, 26 years old, con
vlcted of murdering his parents-in-law
and severely injuring his wife at Osa-
togori, Saitama prefecture, in 190S, ap
pealed from the Judgment of the
Urawa local court, where he was sen
tenced to penal servitude for life.
Since April last year, during the
public trial of the accused, he has not
uttered a single word. This attitude
led the judge and the public prosecu
tor to conclude that he feigned mad
ness as the last resort, hoping to
get released. He was medically x
amlned by Dr. Kure and Dr. Miyake,
and in this examination Dr. Miyake
adopted a singular method.
There is a belief that the blood of a
venomous snake is soluble with that
of an ordinary man, but not with tflat
of a madman. The doctor applied this
principle to the examination of the
suspected lunatic, and sure enougn
the blood of the venomous snake did
not dissolve In the blood of the ac
cused. Thus the doctor concluded
that he was really mad.
The other doctor also gave evidence
about the lunacy of the defendant.
The judge ordered that the trial
should be postponed until the ac
cused was recovered from his abnor
mal condition. Japan Advertiser.
The Chlnnninn'a "Will A Paizle.
A Chinaman, dying, leu eievtn
sheep and three sons and, making a
will, left one half of his estate to his
eldest boy, one-fourth to the next and
one-sixth to tbe third son. They wish
ed to divide without killing a sheep,
but could not see how to do it, so they
sent for a wise man. Sending to his
own fold for a sheep, he put it in with
the eleven. Now take your half six,
said he to the eldest, and he did so;
the second, take your fourth three;
the younger, take your sixth and be
gone two, and they all did so, when
the wise man drove his own slieep
home.
Was the division according to the
wIHT
Hope Is an excellent thing to have,
but it Is one of the things a pawn
broker will not advance anything on.
The expert accountant who Is called
in to balance a set of books never fig
ares on having a steady Job.
LOMBROSO ASSENT-MINDED.
Criminologist Took No Thought of
Money- Amusing; Adventure.
One side of the late Prof. Lombro
lo's character little known to outsiders
made him adored by his children, es
pecially his two daughters, who looked
after him as though he were a child.
His two greatest domestic character
istics were disregard of appearances
and absent-mindedness, says a London
letter to the New York Sun. When
he was invited out in the evening it
was the work of two or three days to
get him keyed up to putting on his
dress clothes, and even then he was
capable of weakening at the last mo
ment and going out just as he hap
pened to find himself.
Once when going to Rome he lost
his overcoat, but was not in the least
discouraged, as he entered the first
shop of ready-made clothing and
bought the top-most warm thing which
came to hand without even looking at
It. It proved to be a long, bright,
bottle-green cloak, which came down
to his heels and In which he looked,
with his broad-brimmed felt hat, like a
figure attired for the carnival.
His absent-mindedness was so great
,Aat when under the care of the home
circle he never attempted to look after
the money and would even leave the
house to go shopping without ever
looking to see If he had his purse with
him. Naturally when he traveled the
consequences for his pocket were dis
astrous. He invariably arrived home
without a penny, no matter how much
he had taken with him, having either
lost it or had it stolen.
In Vienna once he lost his purse,
which frightened him so that when he
recovered it he resorted to the expe
dient of dividing his funds into vari
ous small sums, which he concealed
about his person in all kinds of un
likely places, so that at least he would
not lose it all at one time. There was
a note in the lining of his hat, another
in his boot, several pinned to his shirt,
and so on, but, notwithstanding this,
he arrived home in his U3ual penniless
condition.
FASHION HINTS
Very iheer white muslin and embroid
ered flouncing are used in this dainty
lingerie dress.
The hat is a combination of ecru straw
and plaited net ruffles. A small bunch
of pink flowers nestles under the lace on
the right side. The ribbon on the crown
and at the waist, is also pink.
The lllnter.
"If there Is one thing I hate," said
the determined young business
woman as she sat down to lunch in
down town restaurant, "it's the
hinter. If someone wants to borrow
an umbrella or some money from you
let her say so right out, not come
sbambling into your office, take away
all your valuable time beating around
the bush and droping fool hints on
the way. I don't take a hint. I'm not
dense, but I want to discourage the
habit. I think it shows cowardice.
"Take the man who wants to come
to see you. Why can't he say, 'May I
call?' No, he hasn't the courage of
his convictions, but he has to hem and
haw, look sheepish and hint for dear
life. I won't have a man like that In
my house. Same thing with girls.
Don't you hate the kind that suggests
to a man that a taxi is so comfortable
and she does loathe the street cars, or
the one who asks him if he's seen the
lovely display at a certain candy store
or the 'cute little boxes tney send
with Thorley's flowers. It would be
safer for her if she kept oft the sub
ject, for the chief fun In doing things
lies in planning them, and nothing is
so maddening as to have others make
the suggestions. The hinter only
makes herself unpopular, and the
sooner she knows it the better. Keep
quiet or say right out what you want.
"Now, don't hint that you'd like an
oyster cocktal, because you won't get
one if you do. Sing out like a little
woman have one? Good!"
Appropriate Decoration.
"I aee where 'Cook hats are to be
all the rage this winter. I wonder
how they will be trimmed."
"I should judge with wreaths of the
Ice plant
Natural I'prlalnn-.
"Do you believe any one can bring
about the levitation of tables by
means of spirits?"
"Certainly, if they get to falling too
heavily under them and try too hard
o get up." Baltimore American.
Our New
Hair Vigor
Ayer's Hair Vigor was good,
the best that was made, But
Ayer's Hair Vigor, new Im
proved formula, is better. It
is the one great specific for fall
ing hair. A new preparation In
every way. New bottle. New
contents. Ask your druggist to
show ittoyou, "the new kind."
Does not change the color of the hair.
formula with aaoh bottl
9
Show It to your
doctor
vers
Ask him about It,
than do aa ho says
BBaaaciaiuHDa
As we now make our new Hair Vigor it
does not have the slightest effect upon
the color of the hair. You may use it
freely and for any length of time with
out fear of changing the color. Stops
falling hair.. Cures dandruff.
Mada by tha J. O. Ayr Co., Lowell, Maaa.
' The Midnight Sun.
The midnight sun is not vislblo
south .of the polar circle. It Is above
the horizon throughout the twenty
four hours at Bodo from June 3 to
July 7, at Tromso from the 19th of
May to the 22d of July and at the
North Cape from the 12th of May to
the 2!)th of July. There are corre
sponding periods during December,
January and November when the sun
Is not seen, but the darkness of the
winter is by no means so great aa
might be imagined. The whiteness ot
the snow and the glimmer of the
northern lights make a sort of per
netual twilleht.
Wise Man.
"You made a great hit with th
birthday presents you gave your
aunts."
"Yes, I think I sized up their wants
pretty accurately."
'.What did you give the beautiful
one?"
"A silver-mounted mirror."
"That was a good hunch, and whav
did you give the ugly one?"
"A silver-mounted mirror." Hous- ,
ton Post.
The Modern Child.
"Where do you live, my little man?"
"I ain't got no regular home."
"Haven't any home? Why, that's
strange. You have good clothes to
wear and you look as if you had
plenty to eat."
"Yes, but part of the time I stay
with mamma and part of the time
papa has me, and the rest of tbe time
I'm in the custody of the court."
Chicago Record-Herald.
Thai-keray'a Correction.
A distinguished foreigner visiting
Epsom Downs in Thackeray's company
noticed, St. James' Budget affirms
many men dressed as sailors who were
not, to native and experienced eyes,
the real article.
"Ah," said the visitor, "these are, I
suppose, what you call your British
tars?"
'Oh, no," replied Thackeray. "Only
Epsom salts."
Ilia (luullllrntlon.
"I'd like to get a Job on a newspa
per.
'Had any experience as a Journal-
st?"
"None."
"Then what could you do on a new
paper?"
'Seems to me that I could dish out
excellent advice of soma kind." Louis-
llle Courier-Journal.
Common Law.
The common law of England Is an
ancient collection of unwritten max-
ii)3 and customs of British, Saxon
and Danish origin, which, by long use
and approval, have become funda
mental in English jurisprudence.
Many of the principles of the English
common law hold in this country and
throughout the English-speaking world
as well.
A Heavyweight.
And then," she said, in telling ot
the romantic episode, "she sprang to
his arms."
"She did?"
"Of course. Do you doubt It?"
"Oh, no," he replied, "but after see.
Ing her I can't help thinking that it
must have jarred him quite a bit."
Chicago Post.
Overdid It.
Trusty Henchman Here Is th
tatement. Senator, of your necessary
campaign expenses.
Senator Lotsmun (looking It over)-
It's more than that, I see. It's a state,
ment of my entire expenses. We er
negotiated, you will remember, at leibt
dozen more votes than were actually
necessary. Chicago Tribune,
rerplexlng- Cae.
Professor (after calling on Blanii
and waiting for him to recite) Seems
to me, Blank, you ought to be able to
answer my question, with all ths
prompting you're getting back there.
Blank Well, professor, there's such
a difference of opinion around me"
that The Oareovle.
Might Coolneaa Between Them Now.
Mrs. Jenner Lee Ondego- Do you
know, I have never seen my husband
without his beard. Some day I am go
ing to ask him to shave It off, so I can
see what he really looks like.
Mrs. Seldom-IIolme O, no; flnn't do
that! You'll be sorry. I knew him be
fore he ever had any beard.
So It Seemed.
Rankin There's ona thing that
hasn't gone up In price, anyway. I can
still (puff) buy a fi-cent cigar for a
nickel.
Fyie I ate you can. Fhewl