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1
M AKE YOUR OW N ST O C K FO O D S BY USING
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Humor
and
Philosophy
By DUNCAN M
- ■■
M ATTER
■ « ■
OF
FO R M .
T o w r ite th e firs t lin e o f th e n o te
O u r pen is dip p ed in h o n e y ;
T h e n w e g ro w s t e r n e r a n d d e m an d
liy e a r ly m a il o u r m o n e y .
W e t e ll h im it is o v e rd u e l
A n d a t h is s lo w n e s s g ru m b le ,
A n d th e ft w e c lo s e it b r ie f a n d s h o r t
A n d ad d “ Y o u r s e r v a n t h u m b le .”
’PHONES! BELLI Kesidence, 113
We w o n d e r it Harvey Scott is after
a place in t h e cabinet, or does he still
c h e r i s h t h e fo n d hope of yet being
enveloped w it h t h e senatorial toga.
Rather B r y a n e s q n e , that.
Duri-
coloni»
1200 p<
way tii
perniai
j
About the only way for Govcnoi
to reap his senatorial
ambition is for him to turn republi
can. That is providing the Fulton
crowd keeps in control. If Jonathan
h a s the say in Oregon, Chamberlain
C h a m b e r la in
has yet a chance.________
Crowds are meeting the farming
A
demonstration train at every station.
Through the co-operation of the | electi
Oregon Agricultural College and r a il-, Polk’
road interests which have made this vote,
possible, lots of good is being done nomi
towards the encouragement of diversi on a
j throi
tied and intelligent farming.
, child
The Itemizer was the only paper J cast
in Polk county to furnish its own was i
service of election returns. They
were full and complete in every par
In
ticular, and lasted until ! next morn and
ing. We arc here to serve the people ! Oliti
and give the news of I’olk county, j ing 1
and come pretty near doing it.
possi
insu
One issue that has been prominent i Mos
in the present campaign will remain '(•Old
before the people until it is settled as h
right, regardless of how the election I to fl
goes. That is the question of publici I does
ty. The demand for publicity has ly ‘i
grown out of the campaign corruption or si
that has marked the course of the ever
republican party in national elections j
for many years, and it is a demand J W
that the republican party has con iten
11 IH
temptuously ignored because, appnr- mot
antly, it believes those who liavo vot K™>(
Mr.
ed the republican ticket do no care a\
what means are invoked to win elect l»ret
I imu
ions.
I
V. P . F I S K E .
Itemizer, one year in advance.................................................. $1 50
With Weekly Oregonian or Semi-weekly Journal.............. 2 00
!
I t la t e r d a w n s u p o n t h e m in d
O f h im w ho h o ld s s u c h v iew s
T h a t m a t e s f o r s o u ls a r e h a r d to find.
B u t h a r d e r s till to lo se.
Preaching Sunday morning and ev
ening. Sunday school at 10. Christian
Endeavor at 0:30. Prayer meeting
Thursday evening*—D. J . Becker, pastor
ome and see us in our
new Quarters in the
CHRISTIAN CHURCH
*
1
Preaching Sunday morning and even-
ng. Sunday school at 10. Christian
Endeavor at 0:30. Prayer meeting
Thursday evening.— Rev. Mock, pas
tor
L G H. R O SCHULTZ
CERIES
ki
N E I5S e
CONN AWAY
FISKE, THE BEST PRINTER.
A s w e beh old on d is t a n t , h ills
S ig n s o f t ju a c k 's q u in in e p ills
W h a t is it o u r s y s te m t h r ills —
I s i t s p rin g o r is it c h ills ?
—H o u s to n P o s t.
Had a Past.
“I can’t remember”—
“What Joy!”
“What do you meau?”
“Different here,”
“Why?”
“I can’t forget.”
I ’v e o fte n t h o r t a n ' to s se d a b o u t
U p o n m y bed in slu m b e r
T o th in k o f r e a s o n s w h y I sh o u ld n ’t
G o a n ' b e a p lu m b e r.
’C a u s e o n c t I s a w a s ig n lik e th is ,
“ Y o u n g m a n , y o u ta k e th e le a d .”
T h e s ig n w a s r ig h t, b u t s e e m s to m e
T h a t le a d sh o u ld h a v e re a d lead.
—H a r v a r d L a m p o o n .
W h a t ’s In a Name?
“Whnt’a your name, sir?”
“Wood.”
! “What’s your wife’s name?'
! “Wood, of course.”
| “H’m! Both Wood. A-ah, any kin
dling?”—Success Magazine.
E a c h c lo u d a s ilv e r lin in g h a s —
A t le a s t t h a t 's h o w th e y t e a c h
B u t w h o c a n g e t a la d d e r
T h a t ’s ta ll e n o u g h to r e a c h it?
C
A R ll& Iffi) IlLU i& Tfir\fQ R&
-------------
W e Do Not Make a Special
Sale on Any One Article
And then raise the price on others so as to
more than make it up, but sell! every article
in our store at the lowest possible price. Re
member we keep the most up-to-da e stock of
Fupniture in the city; also Carpets, Rqgs,
Portiers, etc. In passing our window take a
look at that WHITE FROST REFRIGERATOR, the
Beit in the Market.
h
Dis|
needing repairs bring it in
T ook It Fo r Granted.
W a rr i n g .
D id y o u e v e r s e e a r a b b it c lim b a t r e e ?
D id y o u e v e r sea a lo b s te r rid e a fle a ?
I f you did. th e n I a m th in k in g
I t is tim e f o r you to h e d g e ;'
I t is tim e to s ig n t h e p le d g e
O r do s o m e th in g to q u it d r in k in g .
Evened Up Some
Scores.
“Why is the
dentist so hap
py?"
“lie had to
pull a tooth for
his wife today.”
holstering.
HALL & H AYES
House-Furnishers
C H A P M A N ’S
O LD
STAND
PERT
PAR AG R APH S.
n a
a
v
tatatawatìt ^
Per
¿
D A LLA S
Î
TO YOU, WHO ARE NATURALLY CAREEUL,
ma
Solomon's Tomplo.
The original Jewish temple In Jeru
salem, built l»y Solomon 1000 B. C„ j
was destroyed by .Nebuchadnezzar 580
B. U ; built by Zenibbebel 534 B. C.;
partially destroyed by Pornpey 03 B. C.;
rebuilt by Herod 21 B. C. end finally
destroyed by Titus 70 A. D.
fl
v
C ARD&CATAL0G L ABL L a>f k
io 9 * tc o N o iY w e tr
2
PORTLAND OREGON
0
ti
1
0
V
nent
It in economical becausejit can be quickly turned off when not
needed. With gas or kerosene there is the temptation to let light
burn, when not needed, to save bother of lighting and adjusting.
In some homes the electric light bill amounts to only about $2 i>er
month. You can probably get some kind of artificial light for less
money than electric light, hut does it save you anything when it
limits opportunities for work and recreation, ruins y«ur eyesight,
smokes your walls, mars decorations and increases household work.
You can probably save a dollar tomorrow by going without your
meals, hut it wouldn’t he economy. It is not so much what you
save, but how you save, that counts. We are always ready to ex
plain the “ ins and outs” of the lighting proposition to you. Call
on us or phone to us. We are never too busy to talk business.
Willamette Valley Co.
E. W. KEARNES, Manager
Dallas, Oregon
g
§
I
£
Town
Im
prove
STEVENS
ei
t<
T
Ë
TGoncrationa o f live, wide-
awuko American Boys havo
obtained tko right kind of
F IR E A R M E D U C A T IO N
by being equipped with the
unerring, time-honored
t<
e<
J
ai
ol
STEVENS
£
I
I
ments
Draw
A il p ro g re ssiv e H ard w are and
S p ortin g- G oods M e rc h a n ts handle
S T E V E N S . I f y o u c a n n o t o b ta in ,
we w ill ship d ir e c t, e x p re ss p repaid
up o n re c e ip t o f C atu log P r ic e .
w
u
si
Send 5 c e n ts in s ta m p s f o r
ICO Pa^'O Illu s tr a te d C ata lo g .
R e p le te w ith
pi
ol
Pi
Ol
STEVENS
First
an d g e n e ra l
fire a rm in
fo rm a tio n .
S t r ik in g c o v e r
in co lo rs.
Class
J. STEVENS
ARMS & TOOL CO.
P. 0 . Box 4099
Chicopee Falls. 1 W
Immi
gra
Keep
It
•
tb
lx
cc
If
th
se
ce
tv
m
w
tion
and
et
6 0 YEARS’
EXPERIENCE
nr
T rade M a rk s
D e s ig n s
C o p y r ig h t s A c .
Anyone sending a sketch and description mny
rmlckly ascertain our opinion fre e whether an
invention Is probably Patentable. Communion-
DBOOK on Patents
sent free. Oldest agency for securing patents.
I »tentsi taken through Munn A Co. receive
$pecml notice, without charge, in the
Scientific American.
A handsomely Illustrated weekly. la r g e s t cir
culation o f any sclentlflo journal. Term s, *3 a
IL Sold by all newsdealers.
MUNN
& Co.3818«——»- New York
Braucb Office. <325 F S t * W ashington. D. C.
Sc
Ti
dl
se
wl
at
]
ur
In
Qi
I
in
W
wi
In
Yc
In
2h
j
inj
foi
po
J
sei
les
lee
The woman who knows how to
spank a baby properly Is a safe person
to ask advice of.
An African Proverb.
The savages of Africa seek wisdom
from their proverl«. Here Is one of
them: "One head Impaled on the gate
post Is more valuable than six on the
shoulders of enemies."
a
b
COMIC AND SOUVtNIERHPO&f
The girl who Imtes boys knows a lot
more about them than she Is letting on
to know.
The difference between good and evil
Is often arbitrated by the pocketbook.
t
CCVERSANDILLUe)TmTlONi)
Some dollars will go a great deal
farther than others. It depends upon
the company they keep.
Our good acquaintances take care of
themselves. It Is the uncertain ones
that we have to look out for
Ï
tl
IT DOES NOT COME HIGH.
Office on Mill street, just north of the court house
Phones: Bell, 421, Mutual, 1297.
t
$
MAGAZINE AND BO O K LET
One way to be considered interesting
Is to have an unlimited supply of pa
tience, set your caller to talking upon
his bobby nml also upon himself In the
same connection mid then proceed to
use your patience.
Some women are Just nnturally home
ly. and others wear big pompadour* all
the way around.
ag_wg do repairing and up-
AT
it—
The trouble Is lhat when some peo
ple get religion they don't know how to
belia ve.
If you have any Furniture
Remember FII
mencing No\
t
NEWSPAPER IL L U S T R A T O R
ifA T l fA T l fA T IT A T A T TA TA TA TA k V f fA Y A *
“The impudent thing wanted me to
marry him.”
“When is the wedding going to be?”
Vocal Competition.
§
I
Elusive,
A “T hort. ”
■-
B u tch e r K n iv e s , 2
£
Rebuking the Critic.
A flew Epithet.
“The climate here Is salubrious, Isn't
ItV” remarked the tourist.
“Say, friend,” replied the native,
"Jest write that there word down fur
mo, will yer? I git tired o' swearln’ at
this climate In the same old way.
That’» u new one.” — Philadelphia
Press.
N ow , L o u ie ’s p la y e d d o t tu n e b e fo r e
A th o u s a n d tim e s un d m a y b e m o re.
S o m a n y c o n q u e rin g h e ro e s he
H a s s e e n d ey look lik e y o u o r m e
T o h im . H e g e t s de s ig n a l an d
T u r n s lo o se de m u s ic o f de b a n d .
H e d o e s n 't k n o w de h e r o ’s n a m e ,
Btlt L o u ie p la y s it j u s t d e r s a m e .
—W a s h in g to n S t a r .
We have cut our prices on
we are going to offer in
something for you to cut
S c i s s o r s , till s i z e s , :
I
§
§
§
V e n p o litic ia n s c o m e s a ro u n d ,
D a t 's v e n h is u s e fu ln e s s is fo u n d .
D e y p a y h im r e a s o n a b le s u m s
T o p la y “ D e r C o n q u e rin g H e ro C o m e s !”
D o t ’s de tu n e h is b a n d c a n p la y
Mlt g r e a t e x p r e s s io n , so d e y s a y .
t
PHOTO
Willing to Risk.
“He is the father of thirteen chil
dren.”
“Doesn’t he consider that an unlucky
number?”
“Not so much so that he is anxious
for another right away.”
Which Is It?
Haa v o r k d o t’s h a rd to u n d e r sta n d .
I
1
1
I
<
D A LLA S, O R EG O N
£
A Con quering*Hero.
Dot Louie, w h o c o n d u c ts d e r band,
Preaching Sunday morning and even
ing. Bible
school at
10. Senia-
Christian Endeavor at 0:00. Bible class
and prayer meeting Thursday evening.
A. C. Corbin, pastor.
K V ANilKLICA L CHURCH.
“These street cars never stop at the
With Oregon Woodman............................................................ 1 75
right places.”
‘‘Maybe you think you could run them
j Office,
11
( Office,
257
MUTUAL
m :i, i. I Residence, 113
better.”
I Residence,1401
“Of course I could.”
“Better examine your own eye for
railroad ties before finding the mote in
Patroni re One Another for the Upbuilding o f Town and County.
the eye of^the motorman.”
’ P H O N ES :
have h e a t i n g s t o v e :
Come and look them ove
M g r.
c
ELECTRICITY TOR LIGHTING IS ONLY EXPENSIVE
T H U R S D A Y , N O V . 12. 1908.
We
CRAVEN,
BAPTIST 1TIITKCH.
Preaching Sunday morning and even
ing. Sunday school ut 10. B. Y. P. U.
at ($:30. Prayer meeting Wednesday
evening.-—Curtis P. Coo, pastor.
PKKSBYTKHIAN CHURCH.
^ U T iW iw iY j
Endurance.
W. F.
—
1
TO PEOPLE WHO ARE WASTEEUl AND CAREEESS.
Debate Interrupted.
“Your daughter has a wonderful ear
“So you had an argument with the for music.”
conductor? flow’d It come out?”
“Yes,” answered Mr. Cumrox weari
“Didn’t come out. lie wouldn’t let ly. “Seems like it can stand most
mo stay aboard long enough to finish unvthing.”—Washington Star.
It.”—Philadelphia Ledger.
R .M .
Preaching Sunday morning and even
ing. Sunday school at 0:45. Kpworth
.eftgu«*%af 0:80. Prayer meeting Thurs
day evening.—M. I*. Dixon, pastor.
STATIO NERY PRINTING
! O h, s im p le e x c e lle n c e is a ll h is a im !
T h o u g h th e r e is n a u g h t to c o m p e n s a te
Industry.
id s z e st,
I will n o t s it in id le n e ss a n d s ig h .
H e f a i t h f u l l y a t t e n d s th e b a s e b a ll g a m e
I w ill n o t v o ic e a n u n a v a ilin g p ic a
A n d s t r iv e s to h o lle r lo u d er th a n th e
F o r f a v o r s t h a t th e s tu b b o r n f a t e s d e n y — j
re st.
B e c a u s e th e b o s s is b u s y w a tc h in g m e.
1
—W a s h in g to n S t a r .
—C h ic a g o R e c o r d -H e r a ld .
!
to get the good
time specified, s<
Price
W IL L IA M S ’ B R IC K
A d m itted to th e second c la ss of m a il m a tte r.
M e n s p o k e o f h e r a s “ p a s s in g f a i r . ”
B u t tim e file s b y so f a s t
N ow s o m e o f th e s e s a m e m e n d e c la r e
S h e ’s a c t u a l l y p a s t.
—B o s t o n G lo b e.
In o rd e r
M. k . c m KCH
the Top
/''Vxh.raof PRINTING PL ATE<5 for
T H E POLK COUNTY IT E M IZ E R .
In Tra nsit.
Please note our W IN D O W
Like
SPAIN
T ha Funeral Ca n e Too Late.
R a z o r s m id P o c k e t
f
Getting In Style.
Billy Martin, aged four, came to his
mother and In great ecstasy exclaimed:
“Oh, mother! Louise and Oarborry
found such a nice dead cat, and they
are going to have a funeral, and can I
go?” Permission was given, and when
Billy returned he was questioned as to
the outcome of the funeral.
“They did not have it at all.”
“And why not?”
“Mother,” was the answer, “the cat
was too dead.”—Success Magazine.
1 5 % Discount o
with a paper
Board thrown
Look
For Sale by R A Y & C O ., Dallas, Oregon
Eve came running up quite excited,
her fig leaf kimono fluttering lu the
breeze. “Come on, Adam.” she said.
" I want your belp,”
“What’s the matter now?" asked
Adam, who was reading the sporting
extra and didn't want to he disturbed.
“Bring a stepladder and 1 will show
you. 1 have found a palm tree with
leaves that would make the loveliest
'Merry Widow’ hats you ever saw.”
Prof
of Orej
with i
to giv-
Now t
are eli
ing at
at an;
state.
Your Stock
F o r H orses, C attle, S h eep , Sw ine and Fow ls. T h ey are made from the active prin cip le o r the
condensed essen ce of the drug. T h ey d on ’t contain Saw dust, Ashes, Chop F eed o r B ran . A re just
as good when 10 years old as when 10 days old. T h ey com ply with all pure drug law s. A sk fo r
and try once S K I D O O Condition T ab le ts, o r S K I D O O W orm , K idney, C hicken C holera,
B liste r. C athartic, H eave. Fe v e r, Ho| C holera, D istem p er, Pink E y e , Colic tab lets o r Louse Pow der,
S p avin Cure o r B arb W ire Linim ent. D istributed by T H E B L U E B E L L M E D I C I N E O O .,
in co rp o rated ; C apital S to ck $300,000.00; Watertown, South Dakota, U. S. A.
A nd so o n e c a n n o t a lw a y s te ll
O r Ju d g e a t th e b e g in n in g .
A lth o u g h it s la n g u a g e m a y b e s w e e t.
P e r s u a s iv e , k in d a n d w in n in g .
T h a t in t h e le t t e r w ill n o t be
A g e n t le r o a s t t h a t n e a rly
W ill s c o r c h t h e e n v e l o p , a lth o u g h
I t w in d s up “ Y o u rs s in c e r e ly .”
You
that w
const
applici
east it
Now that all the democratic editors
are having their say as to who they
would have nominated for the presi
dency instead of Bryan, we would re
peat our choice of last spring— Judge
Gaynor, of N e w Y o rlo ^ ^ ^
Makes
T h e m a n w h o d id n 't k n o w a b o u t
T h e e t iq u e t t e o f w ritin g
W o u ld n o t im a g in e a t t h e s t a r t
T h a t wo w ero p rim ed f o r fig h tin g ,
B u t a s h e r e a d s a lin e o r tw o
A n d w o rd s b e g in to ru m b le
W it h a w fu l t h r e a t s b e tw e e n t h e line«
H e a lw a y s t a k e s a tu m b le .
Patroni i t Ont Another for the U pbuildh
Preaching hours at 11 and 8.
Crush and mix in feed or salt. Proper dose in tabiets
“ D e a r s i r ’’ — we open w ith t h e w o rd s
T h a t te ll o f w a rm a f fe c tio n s ,
A nd th e n we s t a r t to r o a s t t h e m a n
A c c o r d in g to d ir e c tio n s .
Ami w h en h e h a s b een b o ile d in oil
A nd b a k e d an d fra z z le d du ly
A nd s in g e d a n d frie d o n e it h e r side
W e c lo s e up w ith “ Y o u rs t r u ly .”
( Itemiser, one year in advance
o.m ^rRIPTIO S With Weekly Oregonian or Se
SU BSCK iri*
| with Oregon Woodman
SK ID O O H O R S E AND C A T T L E T A B L E T S
SMITH
------
A
CHURCH DIRECTORY.
ROUGH RIDER SUITS
FOR BOYS 3 TO 8 YEARS
Here is a suit that w ill
inspire patriotism in every
youngster’s heart
I t is m ade of t t t r a beat khaki
Hyde-grado gala tv ». rcgu la' ion
army c u t. w ith l i larye. showy
eagle b uttons. H as b e lt, four
useful flnp p ockets, and is a
genuine value a t
# 2 .0 0
Handsome.nttractive, match
less, it trill do your heart
good to see his pleasure when
he puts it on
1
A <
Be
I
hu
U
B it
J
sw
thf
til
G ET O N E FO R
Y O U R F A V O R IT E
T O -D A Y
T
I f your local d ealer ra n not supply you
w e w ill s e n d , p o s t p a i d , o n r e
c e ip t o f p r ie s , $ 2 . 0 0 . M a d e
fo r B o y s 2 t o 8 y e a r s o ld
T H E B U N N Y CO.
old
89 Lincoln S t., Boston, Mass.
I f you m ention this publication w hen
ordering we willsend a special souvenir
I