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About The Oregon scout. (Union, Union County, Or.) 188?-1918 | View Entire Issue (March 14, 1889)
J Keeping accounts. A Duty Which Errry Farmer Own to Himself BncI ItU Fmnllr. Whon I was a. lad it seemed all tho mechanics, merchants and professional men in my neighborhood looked for ward with great anticipations to when thoy could own and live on a farm, even if it was a small ono. It scorned Ihcy were willing to devote their younger days lo tho accumulation of a competency Bufllcient to buy a farm where they might pass tho more mn- 1urc years in a quiet and contented life. L ving in a viilago and buying every thing they consume except w ater and nlr, led them to look upon tho farm as n life of independence and ease. 1 sus pect that most of these men, when they bought their farms, wont West for their location, for T see in tho Now Eng land States farm after farm abandoned, the fences mudo of chestnut rails rotted away, and all kinds of timber growing on tho once fortllo fields and orchards. 1 liavo been amused, and frequently instructed, lis'ening to persons contem plating farming, that have made their start in life by some other means. 1 llko to see a person start a farming plant with plenty of backing. If ho is not a good observer and does not talk over matters with his neighbors, ho will have a good deal of experience to com pensate him for his reduced bank ac count. This man. with his freo bank nccount, hns a great donl of plcasuro in his an ticipations, in his improvements and in vestments. Ho will make some of his neighbors envious in tho lnvlshness of his expenditures. Ho is planting three dollnrs whore only ono will como up. Ho is farming, perhaps, for pleasure. I llko to seo this kind of work go on when I do not have to sign tho checks. Only a small percentage of tho fanners Iceep a diary, hence can not tell you the cost of putting in a crop, or what it costs to harvest same. It is but a small matter to keep a book in your pocket, or on tho table, and every night put down tho Important transactions of the day. Say It costs so much to plow, so much t'i seed, so much to harvest, and my sales woro so much. Now, after 'deducting rent of land, etc., what Is my net profit? Tho samo with the dairy. 'Charge feed, hay, rent, taxes and labor, and deduct from recoipts, and you will see whethor you aro in a losing game or not. It is not safe to run a busluesF 'without keeping books. There aro many small points in busi ness which seem insignificant in them solves, but whon you como to aggregate thorn they will astonish you. A bank cashier told mo formerly ho did not chargo tho half cent or tho 11 vo cents In 'Computing interest; but later on, whoa ho examined into their immonso busi ness, and computed fractions and small .amounts, ho was surprised at tho ug gnlo. and henceforth ho takes all the '.smallest crumbs duo him. This keeping of accounts is a noun of gratification, and makes tlto porsr moro intelligent. Does any ono wai to stand up and noklowledgo that h does not pursue tho muthods of iutolli gent, progressive farmers? 1 claim that progressive farming stands at tho bond of a.l callings. It is tho very foundation and guiding star of our Nn Hon. Pacific Hural Press. WORDS "OFCAUTION. I'I'ikIihk'o unit Kcoiioiny Nwttwnry to Km ciMH III I'liriiiliiir l'lii'MiillH. On tho farm, and in all tho various dotails of rural and domestic life, pru 'donce and a just economy of time and moans are incumbent in an eminent de gree. Tho earth itso'f is composed of atoms, and tho most gigantic fortunes consist of aggregated items, inslgnlll- cant in themselves, individually conslil- ,.i ,,i,., ..,,.,(.,,,,,,!,.(.) in unity and as a whole. In tho man ngomont of a farm, all needless expend iture should be systematically avoided, and the Income made to exceed the out lay as far as possible. Pecuniary em barrassment should always bo regarded as a contingency of evil boding, and If contended against with onorgy and per severing fortitude, it must son. be overcome. Debt, with but little hope of its removal, Is a millstone, dragging us down and crushing tho life out of us. lie careful, therefore, in incurring any pecuniary responsibility which does not present a clear deliverance with the ad vantages which a wlho use of It ought always to Insure. A farmer who purchaos a good farm and can pay down one-third of the price, give a mortgage for tho other two-thirds and possesses the heart and resolution to work it faithfully and well, enters upon tho true path to suc cess, lie will labor with tho oncour ing kuowledgo that each day's exertion will lessen his indebtedness, and bring him nearer to the goal when lie shall bo disenthralled, and bocomo a free holder in Its most cheering souse, lint, without duo economy In every depart ment, in the dwelling as well as In tho barn and in tho fields, this gratifying achievement may not be reached until Into in life, or may bo indefinitely post poned. A prudent oversight, thoro foro. over all the operations of a farm, in order that every tiling may bo dono that ought to bo done, and nothing bo wuhtoil, will oxort a powerful in Jhionco in placing a family on tho high road to an early Independence, House hold. 1 A planter of Mllltown, (la., wrote a nolo some time ago and placed it inside a bale of cottim, asking the mnuufao turors to communicate with htm. Six months after ho received a letter from Wndsworth Mills, Lancashire, England, btatlng that tho cotton was worlh thero twolvo cents a pound. The planter had gold it for eight and throo-quartor cents, ami ho has been having quite an instructive correspondence with tho firm in tho old country. . .. THE FIRE-WORSHIPPERS. OeKrlptlnn of nil Knlcrtnlninpnt Rlren by a I'nmre Xoblnimtii. Perhaps no raco of people is less known or moro interesting to thetu dent and traveler than tho Parsoca or Firo-Worshipcrs of India. Thoy aro delightful hosts, and, as it was my good fortuno to form tho acquaintance of Sir Frnmgco Domshaw Petit, who was knighted for a gift of $500,000 to an educational institution, l win on deavor to dosorlbo an entertainment J attended at Ills palace. Sir Framgce lives In patriarchal magnificence, and when his whole family is seated at tu bio they number fifty-live. We wero recoived in tho grand drawing-room, as largo as a fair-sized church, and presented to the ladies. Wo found them pretty, intelligent and vivacious, and it is no exaggeration to say that they compared quite favorably with thol American sisters. Tho ladies wero at tired in graceful native costumes. Tho drcs consisted of a waist, such as is worn by Europeans, with a long scarf of embroidered silk, or crapo, called a mrrc, wrapped" several times around tho waist and falling in broad folds about the limbs in lieu of a skirt. Ono end of tho sarro was brought over tho head and dropped gracefully iu front, constituting a very effective head dress. Their jewels wero mag nificent. No crowned head of Europe possesses their equal, and such an ar ray of diamonds, pearls, sapphires, md emeralds can scarcely bo imag ined. Ono of tho guests wore eight jtrlngs of pearls, which faroxcolod tho o'.obrated nocklaco of Queen Mar guerite of Italy. Tho state costume of tho moa is white, but on ordinary iccaslons thoy appear attired in tho :onvontional evening dross. Ono po uliarity of thoir costume ir, not, how- aver, to bo mot In a London drawing- room. Thoy never uncover their loads, and a high, conical Persian hat, or, at meals, a skull cap, always omplotos thoir dross. On tho occasion I am describing an orchestra played selections from Italian operas, and, after conversing iwhilo upon topics o universal intor ist, our host mado a sign to tho sorv- ints, who brought in V-mkots filled vith largo bouquets of Eastern llowors. Hitch lady soleotod one, sprinkled it vith roso-wator from a tall silvorvaso, prosonted it to the gentleman who was to escort her to dinner, and thou, tak ing his arm, sho led tho way to whore it table was spread, overlooking tho sea. Thero wo woro regaled with tea. !olToo. cakes, fruits and twenty-two icinds of delicious native sweets, which had been collected in honor of our coming. It was an event not to be forgotten. The waving palms and tropical Hoivers, tho splash cof tho waves, mingling with tho soft strains ot music, tho beautiful women with thoir Hashing jewels and gracoful dress, woro typical of tho languid, Jreamy hunt, and carried ono uncon sciously back to tho days of Haroun il-Rinhld. Whon tea was over wo wero taken for a delightful drive in handsome European turnouts, and then to dine at another Pursco house. Tho coromonv was long and stately, all tho dishes woro native, but the wines woro Euro pean, and tills dinner, with that excep tion, was representative of native manners before thoy had received tho European touch. Tho ladios whom wo escorted gave us bouquets, as in tho afternoon, and tho host hung chaplets of white jasamincH about our necks ,md wrists. Tho menu cards boro glided crests, and thoy gave us bon bons wrapped la gold loaf to carry away. It was a dream of tho East, but tho poi'footly-nppolutod table, sur rounded by intelligent men and graco ful women, made it hard to believo that the members of this rellued so ciety woro the Fire-Worshipers wo had boon brought up to despise as heathen. W. 1J. Chatllold, in America. An Ample Apology. Through some unaccountable caro lossuoss In tho composing-room of a rural journal, tho obituary of ono of the town's llvost citizens crept Into tho paper ono morning. It was not many hours after the issue of the edition that the "lamented" himself crept Into the sanctum, and vigorously demanded a correction In tho next morning's pa per. It appeared as follows: "Our yesterday's edition contained tho aniiouucemeiit of the doath of our esteemed fellow-townsman, Colonel Jones. It is with profound regret that wo state that our aunouuceinuiit was premature. Tho Colonel still lives, and wo beg to assuro him not only of our distinguished consideration, but that it shall bo our constant effort to seo that ho shall not bo annoyed in tills manner again until tho last dread hour has la very truth arrived. To this ond wo have ordered tho standing obitu ary of Colonel Jones to be distributed. -Harper's Magazine. Iust year thoro woro 5,315 di vorces granted In France. Tho de mands woro largely made by tho wives, and those who had been married from tlvo to ton years woro tho most Humor ous In seeking release from matrimo nial bonds. There wero two divorces granted of cnuplos who had celebrated their golden weddings. In England tho proper ratio of doctors to population Is said to be one to l.'.'OO, but by this rule there are 1, 919 too many doctors in Loudon, and while GOO die every year, 1,800 now ones are turned out. Competition is so great that in some parts of the city doctors will sue u putlunt, proscribe and supply medlclue for slxpuneo a visit. SERPENT AND SEAL. Hnw n Well-nlrectril llillU-t Hobbed I llon-Comtrlclor of IIU Prey. I was paddling along In a small ca noo on ono of tho numerous tributaries of tho Hlo Parana, looklncr for ducks or any thing worth shooting, whon suddenly I heard bohind mo a fearful yell and a great splashing In the water. A bond In tho river prevented mo see ing what it was, but thinking it was somo tapirs or carplachos bathing, I turned my canoo in order to get a shot at them, and saw a liugo snako hang ing from a trco with his body curled two or three times round an unfort- unat) soil. The water around thorn was foaming, and every now and then the seal and tho fore part of tho snako would disappear below tho surface and remain bolow for several sec onds, until In a moment tho snake would twist his body Into a sort of corkscrew shape, and lift tho seal right out of tho water, and thoy would re main swinging In tho air, only sup ported by tho snako's tall. At one time I saw tho second seal jump out of tho water to catch hold of tho snako. and all three remained in tho air, roar ing and yelling most fearfully for somo time, whon suddenly they dropped into tho water again, tho snako novor los ing his hold of tho treo. As nono of tho combatants scorned to bo In tho least affected by my ap proach, I put my canoe within some ten or twelve yards of them, so as to have a good shot at the snako next time thoy appeared, and I had scarcely laid down my paddlo and caught up my gun whon they came up again. aimed right at tho snako where ho had curlod himself round tho seal, and gave him both barrels. The offeet could not have boon greater. Tho snako lot go of the treo and foil with tho whole length of his body into tho water, splashing mo all over, and then again the throe disappeared. After about a minute both seals como up on tho other sido of tho cauoo, looking at mo and shaking thoir heads in tho samo way as dogs do whon thoy como out of wator. They had whito breasts, and I noticed that ono of them was bleed lag from a wound in tho neck, but whether from my shot or from a bito of the snako 1 could not tell. Tho snako a little later eniwled up tho "barranca" out of tho wator, as if nothing was tho matter with him, so I gave him ono shot moro, "which mado him disappoar iu tho bushes, whoro I, being alono in tho canoo, thought it moro prudent not to follow him. Ho was a very big one, for from tho branch to which ho had his tail attached down to tho water was a distrncoof some fourteon feot, and when ho fell ills tail nearly reached my canoe. I do not un derstand, though, how he would have managed to eat one of tho seals, each ono of which was tho sizo of an ordi nary man." Buenos Ay res Standard. EFFECTS OF CRED.T. I.oIh of Money Siiviul If You Abitulii from JtiiiinliiK ltliU. I sco that thoro are tilings about this ladles' shopping trade of ours that you do not know. Lot mo explain them. You see, wo have two kinds of customers cash and credit. For tho cash custonior wo take no risks and grant no favors. For tho credit cus tomers wo do almost any and ovory thing thoy ask of us. Wo are glad to get them and make ovory effort to swell thoir number. Somo houses take nolo of whore purchases aro sent, and whenever a fashionable address ap pears oa thoir shipping books write tho lady at that address offering to put her name on the credit list. Other houses, like ours, dislike to force that trade, and simply wait until such a lady asks a favor of a day's or a weok's accom modation to pay for a heavy purchase, or olso comes and asks in plain terms to bo allowed to run a bill hore. Then, though sho does not know how eager wo aro, wo jump to accommodato lior. A lady who has a bill at our store spends all tho way from 50 per cent, to 600 per cent, moro than If sho hadn't. Not only does sho buy every thing sho wants at this store whore sho has a hill, passing all the rest ovory day, but sho buys things sho does not always afford. You need not laugh; men do tho samo thing. Wo are glad to get nioii ta run bills hero as well as women. It was only yesterday that a gentleman told me that ho had never boon thoroughly well drossod until wo let him run an account witli us. He used to hato to part with money for things ho could possibly do without, but now lie hits dressing gowns, pajamas, silk hoso, scarfs a plenty, and the Lord knows what. Ho says that when ho gets our bill once a quartor ho is always pushed into doing somo oxtra piece of work ho is an artist in ordor to got extra money to moot this expense. Ho Is different from most men, because ho says this spending money causes him to mako money, since ho is driven to oaru a great deal more than ho spends each time that our bill comes in. Hut tho ladies can not do that, you say. No; thoy simply light it out or coax it out of their husbands. N. Y. Herald. Tho farmers around Elborton, Go., know tho worth of persimmons, and for years have made It a point never to cut down a persimmon tree. In places o many treos have been left standing that tho fields look llko orchards; and indeed they are, persimmon orchards, tho trees of which boar Hue crops of fruit almost as valuable as com for fattening hogs. Tho farmors say that tho persimmon tree draws but little strength or moisture from tho soil, and that oxoolont urops are grown even be neath thoir shade. EVOLUTION OF WOMAN. ITow It linn Already IfTectcil the VUllilo Aspect of Moilprn I.tfc. If wo look back a quarter of a cent ury thero is no change so mnrked in social and business life as that In tho position of women in regnrd to educa tion, employment and freedom of ac tion. And this position of self-depend enco and self-defence is taken without any question. A few years ago in Lon don it was not just tho tiling for an un married girl to bo seon abroad alono even in her mother's carriage. Sho may now bo seen in a hansom. It is not long ago that it was thought un safo for women to travel without a male protector. A brace of spirited girls may now go clear round the world together in entiro safety, and without exciting any sentiment more dangerous than admiration. So far as tho world is concerned they nre entirely safe, if thoy desire to be. Perhaps wo might have moro cause for anxiety for tho well being of a young man or a couple of young men on tho samo journoy. Tho world in all civilized lands will treat tho woman as sho wishes to bo treated. It seems to bo well settled that women can protect themselves, now that thoy aro permitted to do so, and that they can como as near to supporting them selves as a good many mon. Indeed, among the colored women of tho South, it is quite a prevalent question whethor thoy can afford to tako husbands. It is a subject of constant specula tion what effect this change of position will have upon tho character of tho sox. Tho sox has always despised a man who is not independent and self sustaining. The moa havo liked wom en who wcro( not too independent. Will womon bo less attractive to mon as thoy bocomo loss helpless, and will their indopondonco work a subtle change in thoir nature which will bo increasing as time goes on, ac cording to tho laws of heredity? Will tho habit of self-reliance, of taking active part In business, porhaps in politics (for a good many womon aro saying that thoy will bo willing to voto and run, or saunter, 'or olllcc, if Provi denco puts tho ballot in their hands), put certain other admirable qualities in placo of tho acknowledged feminine graces and charms? This is an open question, and ono much more impor tant than tho tariff or tho surplus oven the reported surplus of womon In certain Statos. For it can not bo but that tho education of womon and their increasing freedom of action will as virtually affect this Nation as it has al ready affected tho visiblo aspect of modern life. Charles Dudley Warner, in llarpor's Magazine. PERSONAL POPULARITY. A Few Noinlblo WoriN About People "wllli A xth to Crlncl." Tho traditional esteem in which is hold tho man who has an axo to grind is very slight. Solf-interest, which is hardly moro than a synonym of selfish ness, is conceded to bo tho mainspring of his lifo, and, naturally, it attracts littlo sympathy. Tho man or woman who would suecood must do so by re lating himself to something higher than himself, or he fails toinspiro that response in tho minds of thoo around him, which produces tho vital inugnot- ism of a working atmosphere. As n general statement, this is always truo; but tho changing conditions of modern lifo lias linked moro closely all motives and all Intorosts, till, In a very literal sonso, It is truo that no man llvoth to hlmsolf. Practically, therefore, thoef foct is just this: Tho man who has un axe to grind Is ready, in return, to help grind anothor man's axo, and tho most cheerful and encouraging atmosphoro of mutual good will and response is on gondored. In fact, tho axiom is quito rodooiued, by these modern conditions, from any specially unworthy souse of interpretation. Most people who aro good for any thing havo tho traditional axe to grind, and the traditional iron in tho fire. Tho law of co-operation prevails. It binds together the com munity. All workers aro, to a gtvat extent, dependent on each other, and tho recognition and acceptance of this fact Is mutually helpful. Tho nolo of tho age Is individuality. Personal popularity is almost an Indisponsnblo condition of success. Ono may like or dislike this fact, as may bo, but at all events he must accept it. Nor is it without a hlghor sido, bocauso in its ultimate analysis It implies tho im portance of character as a factor in nil achievement. It Is not enough that tho artist paint a picture which Is a joy of possession; tho potential purchaser looks bohind tho picture to tho painter and asks of his lifo, his idoas, and thoso detormlno largely his rank In art, Tho lecturer comes to tho city with a now subject to present. Tho topic may bo of interest, and oven im portance; it may be something the community should caro for; but unless tho speaker secures a personal consid eration and inspires personal Intorest, ho Is apt to fall of that degree of pro fessional consideration which is justly his duo, unless ho bo ono who brings a world-wide reputation, and has already earned his place In public appreciation by tho invalid testimony of noblo and important work. Tho weak sido of tho element of personal popularity iu-0a factor in success is, that tho communi ty sometimes doos homago to a very poor and inadequate oort of idol. Put in tho long run these things udjust thomsolvos. Boston Traveler. A bullet fired Into a Tennessee neero who was stoalluir a nlir struck him iu the right ii'in, ran up to the shoulder, passed dovm to tho left side, twisted nrouud tiVu fltw, and dropped ut hla feu' JOHN BROWN'S BODY. Btory of the Orleln of the MoU Popular or All Wrtr Hone. In tho song "John Brown's Body wo havo an example of a melody anu a set of words which saom never to have bwn written or composed by any body. It is a genuine "folk-song," growing out of a wide-spread sentiment, as many old folk-songs havo done, which far more closely respond to tho music al wants of the common people than any carefully-prepared and cleverly composed song could bo. In tho case of this song, however, its recent origin and almost instant growth into com mon use give as an opportunity to traco its beginnings and development in a way which is impossible with older songs. Tho tune of "John Hrown's Body" had Its origin beforo tho words that are now known or remembered in con nection with it It was sung before tho war of thorebolion. as long ago, at least, as 1S5G, to words which do not now remain in use, at certain Now En gland cr.mp-meetlngs and revival scrv ices. Two members of tho lloston militia company, called tho "Tigers," hap pening to be at a camp-meeting in a small town in New Hampshire, heard tho song sung to religious words, and cmomborcd the air. Tho name of ono of these men was Purington and of tho other John Drown. Not long after this the war brok out, and tho "Tigers" wero mado n part of tho Twelfth Massachusetts Regiment of Volunteers, which rendez voused at Fort Warren, in Boston har bor. Hero tho two men already named, Purington and Brown, formed, with two others, named Edgcrly and Green- leaf, a quartette, and tho quartotto sang, among its other songs, all sorts of words of thoir own "getting up" to this tune. John Brown was a good-natured Scotchman, and tho members of tho quartotto say they sang "John Brown this and John Brown that" to tho tune, until, by an almost unconscious change, tho hero of them was changed from John Brown, of tho "Tigers," to John Brown, of llarpor's Ferry, and tho rand and simplo verso came- into ex istence: John Hrown's body lies a-mouldcring In tho i; round, Hut his soul Is marching on. Before this timo tho masses of the North had not beon in oxact sympathy with tho purposes of John Brown, but tho excitement of tho early days of tho war called out a sentiment which thoso words exactly fitted. Whenever tho soldier quartotto wero in Boston thoy wero called upon to sing this song. The Twelfth regiment took it up. Samuol C. Perkins, of Brockton, a membor oi Maitland's Band, which was stationed with tho regiment at Fort Warren, wrote down tho air while a soldior whistled it. Then the band played it every day. When Edward Evorett formally pro sonted tho set of colors of tho Twelfth regiment on Boston Common, tho speccli of acceptance being mado by Colonel Fletcher Webster ot tho regi ment, tho tune was played, and tho multitude fairly went wild ovor it. riie band played the tuno going up Stato stroet in June, 18(51, and tho sol diors sang it as thoy marched along Tho crowd along the sidewalk took up tho air and joined in tho chorus: "Glory. glory, hallelujah. Ills soul is murchlng on!" Soon aftor tho regiment sang it in marching through Now York on tho way to Baltimore, with tho samo offoct. It spread at onco through tho army and throughout tho country, and be came the anthem of tho Union. In December. 1801, Mrs. Julia Ward Howo wrote for tho air tho words be ginning: Mine oyes havo seon tho glory of tho coming of tho Lord, which was callod "Tho Battlo llymr. of tho Ropublic," which soon became mmonsoly popular, but novor su- planted in common use tho old simple words. Tills Is tho story of tho origin of John Brown's Body" as told by tho members of the band and tho regiment with whom it had Its uso as a popular song. Youth's Companion. Charity and Low-Neck Gowns. As sho is a German Princess the Queen of Swedon, of course, attaches great Importance to etiquette. At tho samo timo her deep desire to roliovo poverty of ovory kind prompts her to favor what Cartor calls "tho simplifica tion of lifo." Sometimes tho conflict between theso two interests leads to funny Incidents. For example, on ono occasion tho Queon was told that somo ladies did not caro to bo presented at court oa account of tho groat expense Incurred on this occasion. This was a revolution to the Queen, and a thought struck hor. "Well," sho exclaimed, "at my noxt drawing room ovory body must como iu calico dressos." "And must bo cut low in tho nock?" ono of the courtiers asked. "Of course You don't supposo I intend my guests to como in overy-duy uttiro?" "But your Majesty forgets that thoso gowns, too, will be of no uso after ward, for nobody wears low-necked, calico drosses." "Ah! don't thoy? I thought of course they did." Boston Tnuibcript. An Easton. Pa., woman hnnrrht n pair of shoos, and at homo found a small purse uostllng iu the too of one of them. It contained ono thousand two hundred dollars In negotiable bonds. She found the ownar. wli - . , - - w t w- fusud to baliovo she had lost the bouds at urn, out was soon ooariaccd. TURNING THE TABLES. How a Thoun'itrnl I.ntrpr Outwitted Mil licit Olrl'n Father. Mr. Hummer had appeared to bo nervous for some timo. Ever and anonymously ho would lower his paper and look ovor his spectacles at tho clock, and his fnco would tako on a moro cruel and dotor mined expression. Mrs. Hummer said nothing, as shc rapidly plied hor needle, but occasion ally sho also would cast furtive and anxious glances at tho clock and hor husband's faco. Neither tho husband nor tho wlfo broke tho silence, until the old-fnsh-iomd clock on tho mantlo-pioce had a mysterious Inward convulsion, and chimed out the hour of eleven. Then, with it sudden gesture, Mr. Hummer throw down his paper, and turned to his wife, with suppressed fierceness in his manner, and asked: "Is that young Beauman in tho par lor yet?" Mrs. Hummer could only nod in re ply, while her faco assumed an even moro anxious expression. A moment Mr. Hummer hesitated, and then, rising with but poorly con cealed anger, ho drew upon his good right foot tho heavy boot which had covered it during tho day. and, while dear, timid littlo Mrs. Hummer con cealed her faco in her handkerchief, tipped softly out into tho front hall, and as silently closed the door. All was still. Tho silence seemed almost painful to tho tender-hearted little mother waiting in the living room, and sho longed to warn her daughter's lover of his peril. Minutes parsed, which seemed as hours, but thero came to hor ears no sounds of violent altercation. The sus pense was terrible. Suddenly tho door opened softly, and old Mr. Hummer tiptoed in again, like the "Son John" of history, with ono boot off and ono boot on, and stood bo foro hor. For full a ininuto ho stood gazing silently at his wife, with a puzzled ex pression upon his face, while faintly and indistinctly from tho parlor came tho soft sounds of sweet convcrso still unbroken. "Well?" interrogated Mrs. Hummer at length. "Well," answered tho old man, "what do' you b'l'evo that impudent young snipper snapper has got, but a short-nosed, lop-eared, cross-eyed, bow-legged, whito bull pup layin' on tho mat in front of tho parlor door, that wont let a fond parent como with in ten feet of him. C. N. Hood, in Drake's Magazine. AMERICAN FABLES. (iooiI Storliw with .Mi i nils Tluit Cun He Uiiilerstood by Kvorj- lioily. TIIK OX A.'l THE ASS. An Ox and an Ass dwelt together in tho samo Field, and many of tho ani mals went to thorn to Inquire about tho Weather. When tho Ox was asked whether the winter was to bo opon or vigorous he Invariably replied: "I can not say for Certain just now Pleaso call Again." The Ass, on tho Contrary, was Prompt to reply: "This is going to bo a very, very opon winter, and buds will start In February." Or, "This is going to bo tho Coldest win ter we havo had for twenty years, and wo shall got no Spring boforo Juno." Whon Winter was over it was always found that tho Ass had missed it, whilo tho Ox had gained further Roputntion for wi sdom by refusing to express an opinion. It thus camo About that tho Ass was spoken of in Ridicule and Contempt. Moral: This also includes Wiggins untl tho Kentucky Gooso-Bono. THE AVOI.K AND THE HAKE, A Iluro which had beon soized by a wolf uttered loud Lamentations and Besought him to spare hor life. "Give mo ono good reason," replied tho Wolf. "Because wo aro both Hunted by Man. Even now I may bo Pursued by somo Boy Seeking my life" "Ah! thon, it will bo a Favor to put you whoro ho can't find you," said tho Wolf, as he bit hor iu two and Bolted tho pieces. MoitAi.: Whon you aro the Wolf it is sufo to Argue Whon you aro tho Hare, it is wiser to run for it. A.V UNGUATEKUl. I'UIII.IC. An American City Treasurer having been ubsont from homo for Three Wholo Days, tho Common Council ordered an Investigation of his accounts. It Was soon Discovered that he was a defaulter and had Absconded to Canada. Ho was Located and Interviewed by a com mittee whom ho Received with great Dignity and Courtesy. "Gontlemon, this speaks ill for your Manners," ho said, as thoy Referred to tho littlo Shortage of $100,000. "I did hope you camo here to show your Grat- uudo, but you insult mo. Somo De faulters would havo burled that Money i or used It for Personal Exponsos. I laid ovory dollar of it out in buying Wheat, and encouraging tho Agri culture of tho Country. Go Hence, base Ingrates!" Mouai.. Agriculture must bo En couraged at any cost. Detroit Froo Press. How He Lost Time. Pedestrian B-b-boy, can you t-t-toll mo how f-f-far It Is to tho po-po-poot- olllco? Nowsboy What d'yo say, mlstor? Pedestrian I - I-reckon you - you - hoard me How f-f-far Is It to tho po- post-oilico? Nowsboy Only half a block, mlstor. If you hadn't antopped to ask mo yoa'd a boon there a'reudy. Liio.