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About The Oregon scout. (Union, Union County, Or.) 188?-1918 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 6, 1887)
OREGON SCOUT. JOMS ft CHAHTCEY, Pnbliiliers. VSION. OKKUOIf. Dill Arp Oop Flailing. I am going fishing to-morrow and stay all Any. I will rig up a big wagon and tako the children along and a basket of lunch, and wo will llsh and frolic and gather flowers and cat and talk and laugh and get dirty all clay long. The signs are all right, for tho dog wood Is in bloom and tho wind is in tho south and it is tho dark of the moon, and I think I see myself just Jerking tho big bream from under tho log. Carl knows every holo in the creek nnd ho can catch more fish than I can and don't try half as hard. Jesslo wants to pick flowers, and I've promised her sho may wodo in the branch, but her mother don't know it. Jessio comes to me and Carl goes to his mother for favors. What a pity it is that grown folks can't bo children oneo or twice in awhilo nnd wado in tho branch too. Tho next tlino Judgo Bleckloy goes to Screamer mountain to bo a boy again and go barefooted and mako hickory whistles nnd chestnut fifes and catch spring lizards and crawfish and climb trees for birds' eggs, and mako black ants fight, and run ground squir rels to their holes and dig angelica and kill iinakcs and wreck hornots' nests and fight yallcrjackets, I'm going with him. I'm tired of playing man all tho year long without a recess. It is a sort of hypocritical lifo. I envy tho children. Tho Scriptures sny "unless yo be as ono of theso littlo onos, yo shall not get to Leaven." So it's timo to begin, und there fore I'm going a fishing. Atlanta Constitu tion. Circumstance Alter Cases. "Isn't that tho gentlemen who paid our faro and was fco polite tho other night?" sho asked In n whisper. "Yes." 'And why does ho treat us so coolly to-night?" "Hush I ho has his reasons. That's his wifo with him." Do troit Free Press. Fnltlt liojond Sight. Each ono of tho two comedians, Messrs. Xlobson nnd Crnno, has a littlo son, and they nro profound admirers of ono another, albolt they are as unliko as black and white. Master Btuart Itobson Crano is a prodigious ro mancer, whilo on tho other hand Master William Crano llobson is us practical and ns matter of fact a lad as you could oxpoct to meet in u Sabbath day's journoy. Out at Omaha tho othor day tho Crane youngster was telling ono, of his customary whoppers. "Yes," Eaid ho, solemnly, "when I was in Ipswich last (milliner I saw a boy lick John L. Sullivan." At (his bold and bald proposition young Itobeoiri) lower Jaw fell about so von inches. "You don't boliovo it, ohl" asked young Crane. "Oh, yes," answered Master Itobson, in prompt loyalty to his littlo playmate, "oh, yes, I bcliovo it if you saw it, but I wouldn't boliovo It if I'd soen it." Chicago Nous. Trliimplinnt as Usual. Omaha Wife Yos, that's tho way it goes. You'll bo sorry somo day you didn't tako my advice. If my first husband had done as I told him tin would havo boon alivo to-day. Second Husband Oh 1 Ho would? You told him always to bo in at 8 o'clock, I sup pose, but if I remember nright ho shuflled off this mortal coil ubout 10 o'clock in tho morn in. "I told him over nnd over again to stop mokIng, nnd ho wouldn't do it." "Well, ho didn't dio of tobacco if I know anything ubout it. Ho was blown up in an explosion." "Yes, ho sat down on ti keg of powder with pipo in his mouth; bo thoro now,1' Omaha World. A Correct DlnRnoal. Young Man (to medium) I want you to (ell mo what is tho matter with mo. Medium It will tint bo necessary to do posit $1 to propitiuto tho spirits. Young Man (dolefully) A dollar Roes. Medium You do not sloop well, you havo bad dreams nnd you aro gloomy nnd medi tate Etitcido every day. Young Man (in great surprise) Correct. Medium Tako this soalei envelope open it only in thu privacy of your room within you will find n diagnosis of your disease. Young Mnu (ono hour lator. OjHnis en velope and loads) rio for supper. Phila delphia Cull. Tlio Unupprerlutlvn Vest. ' Now York filrl And you really wore n guoht nt tho rastla of an English lord? Omaha Man Yes, I happened to havo business with hint in connection with a laud syndicate, you know. j "How lovely it must havo been. And you really dined nnd slept in an old baronial costliil" "Oh, yes." 1 "It must bo tho very brightest jwgo in ybur memory, lsu' it?'' "Well, I didn't cntch cold and didn't bitten." Omalia World. got Heroic Treatment. j Tho eni r of a Chinese bank tried to leave with thu lunils for Japan or soma plauo cn tho American plan tho othor day, but it U not beliovod that tho custom will become popular. The government walled up tin) cashier in tx cell to starvo to death nnd, chopjwd off the heads of all his family. And , next fall they nro going to decapitate ovory-' body in the empire bearing his uumo. Dakota liall. An Optical Doliinlou. British Naval Odlcor I havo heard n good dMl about your American torpedoes, but I never saw ono before, American Nnval Officer You havo better eyes than I liave If you can boo ono now, "There In ono off ttarboard; you must bo iwr sighted." "Great St. Perryl sir; that's a maw of var." Omaha World. A Fair Valuation. Lawyer (lo client) Yon want to sue Rob inson for f 500 for libel, you say I Client Yen; ho has blasted my character forever, Lawyer You think f500 tho jiroper amount. Clieut Well, mako H $250. I only want what' right, Hnrjyr's Butar, THE LIME KILN CLUB. Important Communication on Free Trade. The Dinky Sons of tho Wabnah. Tho secretary announced the following communication: ClIAnLOTTETOWN, P. E. L Brudder Gardner: My namo is 1'op-i.ye, nnd 1 lib on do con fines ob dis city, which has been known for ober fifty years by do unsnboury name of de Bog. I was rendin' in do last published re port ob do Lime Kiln club dat ole Nat do Coursoy's application for membership was not recelbod, kaso lie was too far along do high way ob life. When I read dat report to ole Nat ho Just said: " Wal, I'se mor'n 45 and not eligible, nnd as do presdent has asked me to lecklur on de dark aiges or any udder subject in which I urn in de dark, I must decline for obvious reasons. Now, Pop, yuse a younger man, ob brilliant parts, and I'll nan' de tin dertakin' ober to you." Now, Brudder Card' ner, wld dis yer interducshon, I'm open for an engagement to lecktur, and if I'm to bo gibbcu do choice of subjecks, I shall selcckt political economy or free trailo versus iwr tcckfskun, for dat is de subjeck which I can dilate upon wid do most logical perspicuity and do greatest clokenco. I hab a record down heah by de sea on dat most libely sub ieck dat would turn any Tammany hall toutcr a II bed green wid Jealousy. On tie great occashun ob do contest ob free trade versus pertockshun in dis yer colony do Free 1 rado cluvawnru ob the natural aspira tious ob my genius, closed an agreement wld mo as lcadah to enlist do support ob do heelers ob do Bog end ob Ward 15 at do polls, when do sinews ob war for do campaign was fur iiished I hired do upper story ob do olo tan ncry, laid in n hull browin' ob Brighton amber ale, ilvo palls of wlilto eye, five bar'Is co'n meal, blx bar'Is clams, half ton spenhed eels and six dozen snared rubblts, and den de pended upon my clokenco to do do ress. When do groceries was laid away ami a tin dlnpnh purchased, I iicrceeded to interest do cullud citizens in do great questions ob do day. Do fust man I met on de street was Flat, and I scz: "Heah, you Flat, what you loalln'roun' for? Doy's goin' to bo 'lection soon, and wo's coin' to support freo trade; dat means free lunch for freo weeks. Flat, you healo and toss yo'se'f roun' de highways and byways, do avenues and muiu streets ob dis yer Bog nnd bring in do free nnd indc(endcnt doctors into dis yer tannery, nnd doair you forget Ralph Happy, Davo Frosty and Enterprise Brown, do most experienced rciicaters in uo ward. When doy had assembled dero was no ress for dot tin dlppah till I called do inectin' to order by announcln' dat dis was do freo lunch, freo sample, and consequently do freo trado pnrtv. As do Icaduli oh (lis bund ob putriots, I ask you to lay asido all yoah per sonal nnd domestic nlDdrs for do next freo weeks, and gib your attenshun to do great questions ob do day. When, Brudder Gard ner, I 'iealed in do most touchin' and pathetic terms to dut aujlenco and touched do most tender cord ob dolr feelln's, I ask, was dero a dry froat in dat meetin'? Echo answers, was dero? Den when I reached do cllmacks and sod, "Sink or swim, lib or diol"nnd soforth und soforth, dat meetin' was in do mosthuppy stnte ob uunuiinity and fellow feeliu' known in do annals ob politienl campaigns. In con clusion 1 sorl: "Fellow bog trotters, I will now gib you do Interprotashun of do differ ence 'tween freo trado and pertockshun, und I will do dat by two illstrushuus which nm do most familiar to you. Do fust am dut widout freo trade dero is no freo lunch; con sequcntly, freo trado nm tlo cause nnd freo lunch am do effeckt. Do udder illstrashun nm from de barn doah fowl and do iucubu tor. Freo trado is like de hen dat is sot and brings outlier chickens in do natcral way; doy grows up; do flosh am firm and do flavor sweet when it am cooked. Dem chickens am bro't up under do maxim dat "Moses' inuilder um do bos miss fer Moses." Doy goes to do roost and when in do morulu' do owner ob 'em gets up (ley ain t dero. It nm fust-class fer do con sumer, hut it nm a mighty iioah show fer do producer. On do udder ban' Perteckshun am liko do incubator. Do chickens am forced and brought out in de wrong timo of do yeah, do flesh am soft and do taste poah when cooked. Do business am fust-class fer do producer, but it's a mighty poau show fer do consumer. Do iirgyments all frow was so conclusive dut ebery one ob iiat patriot band followed nio to do polls on 'lection day. But us wo wus about to escerciso do privilege of freo and in- dcciidi!Ut electors a heelor from tho Perteck shun sido asked mo a conundrum. "Weddei is it best to survey cio pas' or 10 iuko a jer specktivo view of tlo matter?'' I sez dat de pends uixni do proseck. " Well," sez he, "if you vote fer our candldnto we'll set up do pins fer do next free weeks nnd frow in a bar'l ob pickled pigs feet to restore do equili bria n nt de rand ob do show." Wo decided in do prospective and rose to do dignity of dis interested patriots willln' to please do in torosLs ob do state above do interests of party anil unloose do grasp ob do foreign manufac turer front do front ob do country. Now, Brudder Gardner, I'm willln' to ac cept liberal terms to lecktur uforo do Limo Kiln club, wid do proviso tint I'm lowed tlo free use ob tlo onion bin in case dero is u ro lupso ob do clilllblaius, caused by crossiu' do straits in olo Kullyluyuh's ice boat. Por HYE. Tho communication was referred to tho committee- on agriculture, with power to send for ik'i-sons und vipers. A N1SW 1IUANCII. Tho following was then rend; Tr.nnu Hauti:, Ind. Brother Gardner, President Limo Kiln Club: Wo most respectfully petition tho illus trious, dlstiuguUhcd mid honorable supremo lodge of noblo patriarchs over which you have tho exalted honor to preside us n reign ing prince in Paradise hall, and guardian of tho philosophies nnd destinies of tho American cltizuus of African descent, that you gr.uit us a charter to locate a branch here, on tho raging Wnlmsh, so wo can bo a jrt and parcel of this sublime organization. Our claim Is based on tho following facts; Wo are "mascots," possess tliecabalistio num ber of twenty-one ages same anil have thnt amount of "trado dollars," "filled halves? nnd "punched nickels" In tho "treasury." Our characters can bo vouched for by tho circuit judge, "prosecuting attorney," mayor und tho chief of police. Wo havo experts in nil tho sciences, adepts in tho games, cham pion banjo pickers, heel and too artists, chin scrajKn, bicycle ridcra and base ballists. Our elitcf innocent amusement, craps; havo good hull in "Happy Alley," rink in "Huppy Hoi low." Wo ourselves are nllways full ami happy. Thu namo wo havo selected for Immortal- tuition U: "Tho Brotherhood of Dusky Sous f tho Wabash." Tho committee extend in- itatlon to Brother Gardner to visit thu Prairie City" and inflict upon us a lecture n the conundrum: "How to Mako Good Living Without Hani Work." Respectfully. . "I inus' admit dat I favor do tono of ills colmmunlcashuu," replied the president as thb secretary jiassetl it to fclni. "Brudder GlWulum Jones um now in Indianapolis to estlibllsh u brunch to be known ns "Do High Chicken," an' ho will bo telecrnfed so dat ho luxir drop down to Terry Haughty nu' In Vttfigat an' report on dis putUtiuii. If bis repVrt ar favorable a branch will bo cotab UhUl dens. HOW MILLIONAIRES DO. According to Southwestern Ideas Gold Onlorc, Chariots mill Diamonds. The rural idea of tho manner in which the Astors and Vnnderbilts live is amusing, and will doubtless be highly flattering to the' per soii3 named. A man traveling "down in Ar kansaw" heard two old women talking before a cabin door. Ono of them, with a clay pipo between her Hps, said: "It do lient all how somo folkscs has cv'ry thing a mortal body could ast ter, whilo others, like you an' me, MLs Petcrby, poorer'n Job's turkey all tho liorn days of our lives. Now, you've heern tell of them Vnn derbilts an' Astors there in Now York, ain't your "Duno but I hev," said "Mis Petcrby." "Well, I'vo lately heern somo things 'bout how they carry on. My man ho got it straight from Zimrl Perkins, an' Zim lie got it from his wife's mother's uncles nevvy who takes a paper printed in New York, so it must bo true." "I ain't a doubt of it." "Well, if you'll bleevo mo. old Mis Vender bilt don't purtend to even wash her own dishee. 8ho don't oven make iier own bed her nor Mis Astor neither, nnd they both sleep in pink velvet night gownds trimmed in laco nt $1,000 a yard, and embroidered in dlamluts that cost millions on millions." "The good land I" "Yes, sir I An' Mis Astor's bed stid is solid oiu wiiu (jianiiui unobs on it big ns goose eggs, nir cv'ry timo she goes out sho has twenty coal black horses hitched to her solid gold charyot, and sho stands up in it dressed all in white satin with her hair linngiu down icr back, nthrowin' fU'O gold pieces to tho beggars." Nuwl" "'Deed nn' it's true ev'ry word of it. And when Mr. and Mis Vnnderbilt goes out they havo their carriage drawed by forty milk white steeds with n coal black nigcer with a diumiiit ring in Ii is nose, leading ev'ry horse; nnd Vnnderbilt ho lnys back on his velvet cushions sinokin' a pijxi that cost a eleun bil ion. ".You don't mean it." "I tlo that. Oh. 1 tell you it's a flno thine to bo rich, Mis Petcrbyj'nn' I reckon nliko as .tot you an' me'd carry on Jest liko that, if vreonly had tho menus to do it with." "Liko enulr, liko eiiuff anyhow. I know I'd have mo a good green nn' red ginghnm gown, an' nil the salt mack'rel I could eat, fer once." rVu' I'd git mo sonic ginyuino Scotch snuir, nn' somo red glass year bobs, I would." Tid lilts. Tim Itnitnn Idea of Unties. Ono of tho Itestnnd brightest girls of tho Back bay tenches a Similar school class in a certain famous orthodox church. Last Sun- day she grew very earnest picturing to tho eager infants who surrounded her tho joys of heaven to lie won by those who live and trust in a way to deserve them. "You must lovo tho Lord," sho said, "and Imj just as good as you know how to be. You must never get Into tempers, you must never t!l naughty stories, you must ulways mind your mammas, nnd lo good in every way you know how, and then you will bo sure to go to heaven when you die. Won't that bo nice?" "Yes, ma'am," lisped all tho babies before her. But if you are bad," and she looked ro- lentingly into tho innocent faces before hor. "you won't go to heaven. If you nro bad." nnd sho took a Arm grip on tho doctrine sho felt called on to teach, "if you nro bad. my dear children, you will go to hell, nnd that that" sho groicd for a word and ended elo quently, "nnd that would be perfectly ridicu lous." Boston Uccord. lllvnl Hnffiilo Calves. "What church tlo you sing in?" nsked ono small boy inquisitively of a now comer in tho neighborhood, also of tender years. "I don't sing," wus tho rnthor subdued reply. " ou ain't much of a feller if you enn't cet in a boy choir somewliero. I liclong to two," was tho triumphant rejoinder, accompanied by a sort of iny-fnthcr-can-liek-your-fnther look. Hut the now coiner was no lamb, and his nnswer was startling and conclusive: "My mother says that if I wear a night gown every night that's enough. Sho ain't going to have mo dressed up in long clothes liko a girl baby every Sunday for folks to staro nt. And I can chow tobucco, and that's more than you can tlo. And tho banner of victory settled down upon tho now coiner in tho neighborhood, and tho mantle of gloom thnt surrounded tho boy chorister was blacker ond stuck closer than pitch. Buffalo Courier. It Is Odd. A nnniolcss professor relates tho following: During tho after dinner talk, tho man for whom I was surveying remarked that mathe matics always seemed a very wonderful thing to him. 'thinking to Interest him somowlint. I begun to illustrate somo of tho wonders: among others, tried to show him tho way in which Aeptuno wns discovered. After somo twenty minutes of elaborate explanation, I was somewhat taken aback to hear hiiusnv: "Yes, yes; it is very wonderful, very; but (with a sigh) there's another thing that's alters troubled nio, and that is, why you havo to carry one for oven' ten; but, if you don't. t won't conio out right." School Journal. BURDETTE. "Father," said young Mr. Hnrdpate. show ing his father around tho university, "this is Dr. Stouongo, our professor of nrchn-sjlogy." 'llo is, eiw ' said tho old man, In n lino burst of scorn, "What tlo you want with a pro fessor of that for? Bible says tliere niu't go- In' to bo no more floods. What ito you want with nrksl" "I am in favor of teaching trades in tho publlo schools," saltl Taxiwyer. "Me, too," assented Constant Bender; "I wnnt canx?n- terlng or wtxxl working of somo sort taught. My boy's got n head that isn't good for any thing else." "I say, Shnughiiessy, phwnt is it all this is they do lw talkiu' alvout tho fait' cure?" "Uz id tho faith euro, thin!" "It is tho fait' cure." "Well, thin, see, yez hav' nothing tho mnt ther wid yez!" "That I havo not" "An' yez havo no faith in onything thnt yez haven't?" "Sorra tho wan of me." "Well, thin, you see, yo are cured tiv it." "Uv phwat yez haven't gotP ''Ah, divil tho wan uvitl UV you's faith, man, uv you's faith." A young man, a student in Bodouln college. writes to ask "if n special courso of study is necessary to perfect a young man in ixlltical argument!" Oh, no; one easy lesson is nil you want. For instance, to sny "Grove Clove- land" is a knock down Republican argument. and to say "Jim Blalno" is nn unanswerable Jtemocrntio argument. "Old Bill Evnrts" is a "chain or invuliiernblo logic," and "Old Tom Baynrd" Is a "scathing arraignment of the administration. To say "G. O. P." is "a resistless torrent of matchless eloquence," and to say "snivel service reform" is "a piti less thrust of brilliant and merciless sarcasm. Just attend a few meetings ami then read the rejtoru in tuo ;wer son, and you'll soon lM-fect yourself in jwlltical argument, Brooklyn Eagle. AGRICULTURAL. ' Devoted to the Interests of Fanners and Stockmen. C'nmilnc Km It. Canning fruit is a very efliciont means of preserving it in a wliole- somo condition, but it is a process wlncli demands curctul management to make it n success. Tin cans are sometimes used, but glass jars are now so cheap nnd are so much better that they should always bo preferred. In tho end they are cheaper, as thoy Inst much longer thnn tin. Tin cans are liable to injure tho ilavor also. There are soveral excellent kinds of fruit jars on the market. In canning fruit two things must be most carefully attended oi failure is certain : First The fruit must be Miflicientlv cooked. Second The air must be excluded and the enn hermetically scaled. I ho best fruit should be selected and that which is not overripe. It should be kept as clean as possible, so that little or no ivashing will bo required, us tins is injurious to many fruits. Pick over carefully and wash quickly, if washing is necessary. Either steam oi slow, adding as little water us pos sible, and as little sugar as will suiHco to make the eauco piilatable. Sweet fruits require none at all, nnd none is necessary to the preservation of the fruit. Steaming is rather preferable to stewing or boiling, as the fruit is less broken and its natural Ilavor is better preserved. A porcelain lined kottlo should be used, as all kinds of metal kettles are likely to be corroded by tho acids of the fruit. The fruit need not be cooked so much that it will fall to pieces, but it should bo so thoroughly scalded that every part of it will bo subjected to a high degree of heat, in order that all of the germs from which fermentation originates may be destroyed. Simply heating is not sullicient. Some kinds of fruit require longer cooking than others. Tho length of timo varies about as follows : Boil cherries live minutes; raspberries, blackberries and ripe currants, six to eight minutes ; halved peaches, goose berries and grapes, eight to ten min utes; sliced pineapple and quince and halved pears, fifteen to twenty minutes : strawberries, thirty minutes ; tomatoes, thirty minutes to two hours. Whilo tho fruit is cooking prepare tho cans in which it is to be placed. Thoroughly scald them so that there may bo in them nothing that will in duce decay. To prevent breaking when tho hot fruit is placed in the can, may bo heated by pouring into it hot water and quickly slinking it, so that all parts may bo heatod equally, or tho can may be placed in cool Wit ter and gradually heated to tho requisite degree. Dry heat is equally ollicient, and may bo applied by keep ing tho cans in a moderately hot oven whilo tho fruit is cooking. Some place tho hot can upon a folded towel wet in cold water, which cools the bottom and bo prevents cracking. 11ns method is very convenient. When the fruit is properly cooked I and tho cans are in readiness, first placo in tho can a quantity of juieo,so that, ns the fruit is put in, no vacant placo will bo left for air, which is some times quito troublesome when this precaution is not taken. Then add the fruit. If any bubbles.of air chance to bo left still, work them out with a fork, spoonhandlo or straw. Fill the can full and immediately put on tho cover anil screw tightly. If thu can is unpleasantly hot, it may bo se curely hold by passing a towel around it ami twisting tho ends together. As tho fruit cools the cover can be tight ened, and this should be promptly done, so that no air may bo allowed to enter. Sometimes tho fniit will tet tlo so that a little space will appear at tho top. If you nro sure tho can is tight, do not open to refill, as you will bo unablo to make tho can quito as tight again unless you reheat (he fruit, in which caso you would bo liable to havo tho samo thing occur again. Somo allow tho fruit to cool about ten minutes before adjusting tho covers. This gives timo for it to cool and set tle. Tho can is then idled with hot sirup and tightly sealed. After filling and tightly sealing, placo tho cans in a cool placo and watch them closely for two or three weeks, when thoy may bo sot away if thoro is no signs of fermentation. Should any such signs appear, open tho can immediately, scald tho fruit thoroughly and seal as beforo, being very careful to examine tho cover and see if there am not somo imperfection which prevents tho perfect exclusion of air. Small fruit and tomatoes nmv bo I prcsorved in bottles or jugs by sealing with wax. Thoroughly heat tho bot tle or jug and put in tho fruit, first putting in juice as when using cans. Shako down well and refill. Then place two thicknesses of cloth ovor tho mouth, insert a tightly fitting cork and thoroughly covor tho whole with molted wax. Tho following is a good recipo for tho wax : Ono pound resin, two pounds beeswax and ono and a half ounces tallow ; melt and mix. When canning in glass vessels, caro must bo used to protect tho vessels from draughts of cold air, or they willJ bo liable to break. Apples, pears, quinces and peaches should be pared and cut into pieces small enough to can conveniently. In canning, thoy may bo arranged in tho can with a fork, if desired, tho juico being afterward added, but caro must bo exorcised to got out all air bubbles, which aro very liablo to occur when this method is adopted. Tho skins may be very expeditiously removed from peaches by immersing thorn in boiling water for a minute or two and thon rubbing with a coareo towel. This is be8t done when they have just reached maturity, but have not become very mellow. The ItooklcHM Farmer. The booklets farmer is a one-horso farmer with a life-long ambition to gain a reputation for wearing a dirty shirt. He will alarm tho neighborhood by getting up two hours beforo day, then sit around and not go to work till after sun up. He will complnin of hard times, then tear his pants climbing a fence where a gate ought to be. He will pay .$3 for a new bridle, then let the calf chew it all to pieces before Sunday. Ho will get his neighbors to help him in getting a cow out of a bog, then let her die for want of attention. Stock will get in and dectroy his crop nt a plaee in his fence that he has been putting off repairing for six months. He will talk all day Sunday about what he knows about farming, then rido around the neighborhood Monday looking for seed potatoes. Ho will go in his shirtsleeves on a cold day to show what ke can stand, then return home at night and occupy J two-tlnrtls of tho hreplace till bedtime He will ridicule the mechanism of a cotton planter, and then go out and mash his thumb nailing a board on the fence. Ho will go lo town on Saturday and come buck with oU cents worth of cof fee, a paper of pins, a dollar's worth of chewing tobacco and his hide full of whisky. He is economical ; economy is his fort. He will save ten cents worth of axlo-grease and ruin tho spindles of a tv wagon. He won't subscribe for a newspaper, but will borrow one from his friend and his wife or daughters will forgot that it was borrowed and paste it upon tne wall. And it may be added that he wil spend a dollar treating a set of black guards and loafers, and let his wife and daughters go in rags for want of 50-cent calico dresses, which he is too poor to pay for. He will leave his plow in tho furrow and corn implanted to go to town to hear a political speech, and spend the balance of tho day tolling what "boss" his candidate is, and what a fool and rascal the other party has nominated. He is "wiser in his own conceit than ten men who can give a reason," and "though yon bray him m a mortar like wheat, his foolishness will not de part from him." I.ursje or Small FurniH. l no question occasionally- conies up whether large or small farms are re ally best for the community. In this country mere can liaruly bo a ques tion. It is truo that on largo farms, well conducted, the crops are raised, the stock kept and tho animals and their products marketed at much lower cost of production than upon small ones, provided the small farmer reckons his own timo and labor and that of his family at the samo price which tho large farmer or company pavs for tho same kind of labor. Nevertheless he regards his own independence as worth a good deal to him, und to it is. This independent feeling this being "his own boss" costs him just the prapor tionato diilerence between his profits and those of the larger farmer. Tho community is, however, bene fitted by having many of these inde pendent, hard-working citizens in place of a lew larger corporations employ ing mostly single nion, nnd but few men with families. Every well to do small farmer, who by his hard work and good business habits is improving ins condition year by year, is ambi nous to own nioro land, to lure more help and to increaso his profits. When his weak or shiftless neighbor gets into dilhculty he loans him money and takes a mortgage ; thus tho bigger fich cat up tho smaller fry, and the tend ency to larger farms is inevitable. If things go wrong on tho big farms thoy are broken up, sold in small par ticles and 6inall farms again come into possession. Ono hundred and twenty-three new Granges have been organized in tho United Statos so far tho present year, against a total of ninety-one for all of last vear. In hungry hens, that is hens that aro always kept hungry, thcro is no money, but botween a well-fed hen and one that is over-fed there is a vast difference. A hon that is made to scratch for everything she eats is in but littlo danger of eating too much. Flint, in his work on tho grasses, in speaking of timothy, remarks that at tho time of blossoming it has a greater percentage of flesh, fat-forminir prin ciples, and less woody fibre than most other grasses. It is of interest for far mors to know which grass is most prof itable for them to grow. . To bo tho most profitable a horso should bo able to perform six good days' work out of seven, and farmers who would mako tho best of everything from a financial standpoint must be ready and willing to dispose of their Horses whenovor they begin to show signs of failure threugh old age, or are accidentally disabled. Tho Dayton (W.T.) Chronicle, which was destroyed by fire a few weeks ago, cornea to us this week in n now dress, and as nowsy and fresh as ever. It presents its usual neat appearanco typographically. Tho publishers say that tho new dress "was purchased of Palmor it Itoy, tho printers supply houso, Portland, who aro also eatab lished at Los Angeles, San Francisco and New York. After Btudying cata logues wo aro satisfied that Palmer tt Key cannot bo beat on tho coast for material and terms." Portland World, NATURE. All Nature, ever new makes study new, No finite mind can see tho Everywhere, There Is a Presence only souls which dwell Above untrodden heights, with eyes unsealed And ears unstoppeo can sec or feel or know. Yet all who will may clasp the Hidden Hand, Nor fear to meet the Universal Eye. Somo ear's can hear soft whisierlngs in space. And voiceless sc ngs and hymns nnd elegies. Some eyes can see the Images that sleep Unhewn in marlilo blocks. Some hands can clasp Impalpable and fleeting forms thnt fade Upon appearing. Adoring, let us walk, In holy wonder, down Tho aisles of sacred groves: 'mid grassy plain. By ocean's shores, and hear tho wordless voices Of wave and leaf; and upward look in hope, And rest In nature's lap, nnd feel nnd hear The beatings of its omnipresent heart. In nature's endless panoramic flight Are words which God has framed and left as thoughts. Jlitlst changing shadows of n changing light, And prnlse of psalming winds that mold the hills As altars where the nnsels kneel amidst The clouds that veil celestial forms that come From far, we, too, have place to live and die. Yet death Is blinded life, so nature says, i changeful nnturc is our changeless God. At nature's oiwninR gate we stand to seo "What nil life is is liere and everywhere. With folded hands and bowed head wo wait For God to lead us where life is all. -Itev. W. II. Tlatt. KNOWN BY THEIR GAITS. Chnrncter Iiitllrnteil hy the Milliner In Which People Wnlk. Men havo ns many different gaits as horses, uiiu ipjuo ns cnnrocterisuc and distinctive. Now, thoro is Jorkins, who is a long, ooo jointed sort of man; his legs waver nliout at over- step, and his feet point straight forward, or, if nnything, turn just n littlo inward at tho toes; whereas Bumble, who is short and inclined to lw "stout," tumshistoesdecidedly outward, plants his feet well apart, and bobs along in a yery decided nnd determined man ner. Jorkins, of course, is n good natured fellow, whom overybody likes well enough, but who is somewhat lacking in forcoof char acter. Dumblo, on the other hand, is forcible enough in somo ways. In fact, I havo hearil people call him obstinate: nnd ho has an idea that his clothes, and his wife, and his baby, and his hou, nnd, in short, nil hi3 belong ings, are, by virtue of being possessed by him, nnd by nobody else, respectively tho most stylish, tho dearest, tho prettiest, and sweet est, nnd tho most comfortable, and, alto gether, tho lest in every way that exists in this or any other world. Perhaps you think ij is because I know Dumble, nnd dislike him, that I think his gait expresses all this; but I tlo solemnly assure you thnt tho very first time I saw Dumble going nlong tho street I formed just that opinion of him, which subsequent acquaint ance lias only confirmed. Tilbury, now, is as different from tho other two as possible. Ho walks with short step, has small feet, of which ho is rather vain, nnd, when ho is in a hurry, has a sort of wriggle in his gait. Ho can't keep step with any other man, partly because ho steps so short and partly becnuso he is ir regular, giving a littlo skip once in a while when a now impulse strikes him a thing that happens, on tho average, nt least once every flvo minutes. Ho was nlwnys called "Tillio" at school anil played witli the girls at recess. Ho sings a fair tenor nnd a very pretty fal setto and has a taste for art antl for the lighter sorts of poetry. Let us turn from Tilbury to a distinctively masculine specimen. He walks as though tho walking itself were a pleasure to him, as indeed it is. That is what tho professionals would call a "square heel and too" gait a good stride, a strong push with the toes of the hind foot, a straightening of tho foremost leg beforo ho puts it down and nn easv swing of tho whole body. That is Tom Johnson. When ho was in coUereho viiil! ! inside of nine minutes nnd his six miles within the hour. Perhaps his traiuincr somo of the peculiarities of Ins tn!r i,.t i,t character is just ns square and straichtfor- ""' s "it waiK, and wnen ho undertakes onything ho goes through with it nnd wastes no time by tho wny. It will not do for a man to say much about women's gaits. Thoy aro not so diverse as men's; for ono reason, I imagine, beennso women wear their shoes tighter, nnd nobod in painful shoes. Most of them licnd forward at tho hips, too, and keep their knees lient nil tho time. Go up tho uvenuo any Sunday morning after church, and tho women who mini erect can oo counted on your lingers. Tho recent pomilnritv of POM 1 1 1 1 nn Cull eatt shoes ought to havo its effect on women's gait nfter a while, and, ns a matter of fact, it seems to mo that tho younger girls do wnlk i ..... i, . , . . ui-iici man men- emer sisters. j, Walter Ivci-shaw, in the Epoch. A NEW MORNING. How rich am I, to whom the Orient sends Such gifts ns yonder fair and liberal day, Whoso argosy oVrsails the mist bar nrav. And now its shining length of cable spends. Uon its decks are Kii::ml waviug friends. w ho uy tlielr every jocund to'..-im say: "Hence, from thy spirit, put distrust nwav. This bountlliood thy slackened fortune mends t We've olives from tbenoft Kray trees of peace. auu (lauutsic apples heaped tor thee in siwrt liy the blithe hours of youns Aurora's court. And myrrh thy heart in worship to release. This freight Is thine for iower'n mid joy's In crease; Oh! be no longer doubtful day's in port." Kil't i ' Tiomn- in Th lid i-.Jnnt. FAULTLESS FAMILY MEDICINE "T have used Simmons Liver Regulator foe man y years, hav ing made it my only Family Medicine. My mother before me wns very partial to It. It is a safe, good and roliable modi cine for any disorder of tho system, and If used in time is 3p s: trmt jirrrrnrirr of aleHnesa. I often recommend It to my friends, and shnll continue to do so. "Rev. James M. Rollins, "PastorM.E.Churoh,So.Falrfleld,Va.,, TIME AND DOCTORS' BILLS SAVED by ohrm kccjtliiir Slmtnonti Ziiver ltegulator in the house. "I havo found Simmons LIvor Regulator the best family med icine I ever used for anything that may happen, have used It In Indigestion, ColleVlarrhtra, Jitltousnrti, ana found It to re lievo Immediately. After eat ing a hearts supper, If, on going to bed, I take about a teaspoon ful, I never feel tho effects of the supper eaten. "OVID G. SPARKS, "Ex-Mayor Macon, a a," "ONLY GENUINE? llu our Z Sump on front of Wrapper. . H. Zeilin & Co., Soa Proprietors, rrlce, S1.00. rillLADELVIIIA, PA.