Corvallis gazette. (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, February 10, 1905, Image 7

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    Jill Humors
Are impure matters which the skin,
liver, kidneys and other organs can
not take care of without help, there if
uch an accumulation of them.
They litter the whole system.
nmples, boils, eczema ana other
eruptions, loss of appetite, that tired
feeling, bilious turns, fits of indigos-
tion. dull headaches and many other
fannhiM r t trmm: !
Hood's Sarsaparilla
and Pills
Remove all humors, overcome all
their effects, strengthen, tone and
Invigorate the whole system.
' "I had salt rbenm on my hands so that I
eoold not work. I took Hood's Sarsaparilla
and it drove ont the bnmor. I continued
Its use till the sores disappeared." Mbs.
Iba O. Brown, Kumford Falls, Me.
Hood's Sarsaparilla promises to
cure and keeps the promise.
Arsenic and Corpulence.
A curious story is reported concern
ing a barque which' arrived recently in
port having in her cargo three hundred
casks of arsenic. The crew slept very
near the large array of barrels contain-1 Knicker So the Newriches are get
lng the drug, which gave off constantly mg culture? Bocker Yes, they have
an indescribable odor. They soon all learned to speak of a house beautiful
noticed the same thing, and several of mstead of a Deautiful house. New
tne tars Decame aware mat tney were
Becoming aonormaiiy stout, une man
gained twenty-five pounds. The aggre
gate extra ' weight put on by the en
tire crew was little less than four hun
dred pounds. This was attributed to
vapor generated by the action of the
sun on the cask and inhaled by the sea
men while they slept
Take Laxative Brorao Quinine Tablets. All drusr
frtsts refund the. money If it tails to cure. E. W.
j rove's signature is on each box. 25c.
One Man's Theory.
Mrs. Newkid You talk about the joys
of single blessedness, but, according to
statistics, more bachelors commit suicide
than married men,
Mr. Oldbach Yes, that's true.
Mrs. Newkid Oh, you admit it do
yon? Then, I suppose you can explain
why it is so?
Mr. Oldbach Certainly. They are
driven to desperation by other people's
10,000 Plants for 16c.
This is a remarkable offer the John A.
Salzer Seed Co., La Crosse, Wis., makes.
Salzer Seeds have a national reputation
as the earliest, finest, choicest the earth
produces. They will send you their, big
plant and seed catalog, together with
enough seed to grow
1,000 fine, solid Cabbages,
2,000 rich, juicy Turnips,
2,000 blanching, nntty Celery,
2,000 rich, buttery Lettuce,
1,000 splendid Onions,
1,000 rare, luscious Radishes,
1,000 gloriously, brilliant Flrrvrers.
This great offer is made in order to in
duce you to try their warranted seeds
for when you once plant them you will
grow no others, and
providing you will return this notice, and
if you will send them 26c in postage, they
will add to the above a big package of the
earliest Sweet Corn on earth -Salzer's
Fourth of July fully 10 days earlier than
Cory, Peep o' Day, etc., etc. PP. U. L.i
In order ,to keep some people's friend
ship it is necessary to keep them.
The financial plank in th women's
platform is pin money.
The first successful flour mill was
erected is London in 1764.
In fifty years suicide has increased in
Great Britain by 200 per cent
A dog. will butt in on mighty little
Newport News, Va., July 22, 1903.
Iast summer while recoverine from ill
ness of fever, I had a severe attack of
inuammarory ievmiausaiintlae JfJiees,
uuauic iu leave my
room for several months. I was treated
by two doctors and also tried different
lunds of linaments and medicines which
seemed to relieve me from pain for
awhile, but at the same- time I was not
any nearer getting well. One day while
reading a paper I saw an" advertisement
of S. S. S. for Rheumatism. I decided investigation, that thirty-two out of ev
to give it a trial, which I did at once. ' ery hundred criminals in the country
Alter 1 naataten tnree bottles I felt a
great deal better, nd I still continued
i.?, f te iVa3f entirel7
cured. I now feel better than for years,
and I cheerfully recommend S. S. S. to
any one snCering from Rheumatism.
613 32d St Chas. E. GrrjERSiiE3v8i
Rheumatism is caused by uric acid or
some other acid poison in the blood,
. 1 i- 1 . . i .
which wuen ucpositea 111 xne muscles
and joints, produce the sharp, cutting
pains and the stiffness and soreness pe-
cuhar to this disease. S. S. S. goes di
rectly into the circulation, all irrita
ting substances are neutralized and
filtered out of the system, the blood is
made pure and the general health is
built up tinder the purifying and tonic
enectsot the vege-
M-1T FnpAm ci
Write for our 6te -
entfree. Ourohv
aidant will advise
without charge all 1
wno- will write ua
about their .case. -
, The Swift Sqecffio Cpmptgy, "Atlahta. Ga.
iidcs. yiuiac Jtu ssL-tr
Beat Cough tijrap. Tastes Qood. Ota i
In time. Bold by drogytsttw
Ky kz xzs
Binks Are you going to get a new
suit? Jinks No, my tailor says he
can't afford it -Cincinnati Tribune,
A Compromise: Miranda No, Fred,
1 'won't take the armchair; you take it
Fred Er suppose we both take it?
"Young Dr. Swift calls every day on
the little widow." "Dear me! Is she
as ill as all that?" "No, but she is
as pretty as all that" Ex.
Foodie My dear girl, I have a little
more sense than you give me credit for.
Mrs. Foodie I am glad of that for
your sake! Illustrated Bits.
"De only thing dat some people gits
out of education," said Uncle Eben, "is
de ability to talk so's people can't un
derstand "em." Washington Star.
Binks Skinnem tells me he is going
Into Catchem's law office as a partner, i
Jinks Doesn't he mean as an accom
plice? Cinnatl Commercial-Tribune.
She Is skin grafting a very late dis
covery? He No, it is only a new
branch of a very old art; all grafting
Is a skin process. Detroit Free Press.
York Sun
Broker No more margin to put up?
Why, when the account was opened
you told me you were well off. Lamb-
ley So I was, but I didn't know it.
Town Topics.
She Did you ever take your automo
bile apart to see how it worked? He
Well, not exactly. I have taken it
apart to see how it didn't work. Yon-
kers Statesman.
Mayme What a gossip Mrs. Gadby
is! Edith Yes, indeed. I never tell
her anything without finding out that
she has already told It herself. Phil
adelphia Bulletin.
Mr. Jones My daughter is only 18.
You had better wait until she is older.
The Lover Well, I've waited two
years for her to get older, but she still
stays at 18. Judge.
After the Wake: Mrs. Cassidy
Twas very natural he looked. Mrs.
Casey Aye! shure he looked fur all
the wurld loike a loive man layin' there
dead. Illustrated Bits.
Giles So you've got a place in that
banking house? I suppose it was be
cause you knew the president? Har
ris Partly that, and partly because
he didn't know me.-r Boston Tran
script . Aunt Hannah Have you told any
one of your engagement to Mr. Sweet
er? Edith No; I haven't told a soul
except Bessie Miller, who thought he
was going to ask her. Boston Tran
script Johnny Geehaw Paw, what's the
law of gravitation? Farmer Geehaw
I dunno. I hain't got time to keep
up with all the fool statoots the durn
legislatur' passes. Louisville Courier
Journal. Highwayman How much money
have you got? Heldup I couldn't
guess. Highwayman You can't guess
the amount? Heldup No. Highway
man Then give it up. Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Neighbors I heard your dog howling
last night If he howls three nights
in succession it's a sure sign -of death.
Nextdoor Indeed! And who do you
think will 'die? Neighbors The dog.
Chicago News.
Seedy Stranger Excuse me, sir, but
can you change a dollar for me? Hu
manitarianWhy, yes. Seedy Stranger
Thanks. And now will kindly tell
me where I can get the dollar? Cleve
land Plain Dealer.
"That Mrs. Snaggs is too much of a
aristycrat fur me to mingle wid."
"How's that?" "She was knocked down
by a push cart and she had it put into
de paper dat she was hit by an auter
mobile." Detroit Free Press.
Tommy Smokln' cigarettes is dead
DiirA to hnrt vr .Timmv fi'rm! Whftrn
md yer git dat notion? "From pop.1
. , i - !t Rtrjn;n v ijj0
aw. ne wuz jist stringin yer. rso,
he wasn 1 strlngln me; he wuz strap-
pin' me. Dat's how I knows it hurts."
Catholic Standard and Times. v
"How do you account for the fact,'
asked the doctor, "as shown by actual
are left-handed?" "That's easily ac-
COUI1ted for," said the professor; "the
other sixty-eight are right handed."-
T . ' r)f,
London Tit"Bits-
I "Say," said the girl's dear little
brother, "are you a baseball player?"
"No," replied young M. Slowton,
"what mude you ask that?" "Oh,
nothing, only when ma was askin' sis,
the other day, whether you was evei
- goin to come to bat, she said it looked
to her as though you .was playin' for
your release. ix.
Mrs. Tittle Wasn't it'. disgraceful
the way these "women talkedduring
the play last , night? Mrs. Tattle
Well, I should say so.- arah Smookina
was trying to tell. me the fuss in the
- .. .
- , w
a. clatter rconldn-'t hear
more than nal' she said-r Boston Tran-
script j-iJ
"Yon are an hour late this morning,
Sam." "Yes, sah, I know it sah."
"Well, what excuse have you?" "1
was kicked by a mule on my way here,
sah." . "That ought not to have de
tained you an hour, Sam." "Well, yon
see, boss, it wouldn't have If he'd only
have kicked me in dis direction, but
he kicked me de other way!" Yonkerg
Historic Piles Almost - Onr Tonus
Country's Only Ruins.
The century-old missions of Califor
nia, builded by Franciscan monk and
Indian neophyte, might well be likened
to "the temples of silence," writes J.
Torrcy Connor in the Four-Track
News. Upon the crumbling adobe
walls the wild mustard hoists its yel
low banners; in the roofless arcades,
where tread of priestly feet Is heard no
more, sunshine and rain have wrought
their will; lizards crawl over the black
ened shrine, and bats cling to the raft
ers of the sanctuary, beating the air
with noiseless wings at the approach
of a footstep. j
These historic piles, almost the only
ruins of which our young country can
boast are accounted one of the sights
by all latter-day pilgrims to the Gold
en State; but as a rule, only the more
accessible of the missions are visited,
the inconsequent tourist sandwiching
them between flying trips to the ocean,
the mountains, the giant trees, the
gem-like , lakes, the golden-fruited
groves and the smiling valleys of the
land where it is always summer. .
The tinkle of the vesper bell, echoing
across wide stretches or pasture, is
mingled, now, with the harsh clang of
the street car gong; and on the very
thresholds of the missions may be
found the paper lunch box and the
jmpty sardine can of the globe-trotter.
The religious processions, . halting
jefore wayside shrines, and the sandal
sd. brown-robed padres, Journeying
from south to north, are gone from the
highway. The alcalde, who ruled the
pueblos with iron hand, the dark-visaged
Indians, the stern-faced Spanish
3oldiers where are they? Gone; and
gone, too, the caballero, or Spanish gal
lant, with his tinkling guitar and his
love songs, and, likewise, the soft-eyed
senorita with her mantilla, telling her
beads beside the quaint old confes-
sional we see here to-day. For the
Spanish caballero of our time has sub
stituted the ugly dress of the gringo
for the velvet jacket and broad-brimmed
sombrero; and senorita, soft-eyed
and coquettish as was her grandmoth
er before her, has laid aside the man
tilla, and aspires to a Paris hat.
The Santa Barbara Mission, besides
being the most Important of the mis-!ofteil take to 8trangers; Yon Mr8.
slons, has another distinction it is the Gippur is real nice, don't yon, Agnes?
home of one of the most photographed I Agnes You said she was' a cat, mam
individuals in the United States, ma; but she doesn't look bit like one.
Where, in the Santa Barbara Mission
or its grounds, has not this strong
faced monk appeared, photographical
ly? The interior of the church, in which
generations of the followers of the
cross have worshiped, is1 decorated
with many pictures executed" by the
Spanish masters, and by sacred im
ages that are older than the church
Queerly Procured Evidence.
Many years ago a ship was chased
at sea on the suspicion that she was
a slaver. During the pursuit her cap
tain dropped something overboard.
When overhauled the old tub was tak
en to Port Royal for trial. There was
nothing on board to sustain the charge
1 of slave dealing, and there seemed ev
ery likelihood of its owner recovering
damages for illegal seizure and deten
tion. But another ship had passed in
the night in the wake of the others.
She had witnessed the chase and
flight, but had stopped to catch a
shark by the way. In the stomach of
the shark the sailors found a tin box.
In the box were the papers of the
fugitive vessel. These proved her to
be a slaver of the most unequivocal
character, and upon their evidence she
was condemned and confiscated.
Machinery Tories.
Engineers judge of the condition of
their machinery by the tjone it. gives
out while running. Every engine.
whether stationary ornocomotlve." has
. a particular tone of its own. The en-
; gineer becomes accustomed ; to that
and any departure from it at once ex-
, cites a suspicion that all is not right
j The engineer may not know what is
the matter; he may have no ear tor
music, bnt the change- in the tone of
J his machine will be at once perceptible
I r r
and, being instantly recognized, will
cause him to start on an Immediate in
vestigation. ...
Thin rs Won a .Rem-naberiTJff.
Do not forget that it-Isn't necessary
to be disagreeable, in order to disagree
with the other man.
If we took as great pains to say
kind things as we do to think unkind
xii um glorious mira oi uie ireo me
politician seems to be a necessary evil.
Doctors first prescribed
Ayer's Cherry Pectoral over
60 years ago. They use it
today more than ever. They
rely upon it for colds, coughs,
bronchitis, consumption.
They will tell you how it
heals inflamed lungs.
" I had a rery bad cough for three years.
Then 1 tried Ayer's Cherry Pectoral. My sore
lungs were soon healed and my oough dropped
Mas. Tbaxl Hyds, Quthrie Centre, Is.
Me.. 50c.. (11.00.
All dnigfritts.
Trowel 1. Mass.
Old Coughs
One Ayer's Pill at bedtime insures
a natural action next morning.
The British Museum contains over two
million volumes of printed books and
manuscripts, which are stored upon forty
miles of shelving.
P1TQ Permanently Cured. No fits or nervousness
ll 10 after firstday'suseof Dr.KUne'sGreatNerve
Eestorer. Send forFree2 trial bottle and treatise.
Dr. K. H. Kline, Ltd.,831 Arch St., Philadelphia, Pa.
Being born great carries no assurance
with it that a man will be great at the
For bronchial troumes try Fiso's Cure
for Consumption. It is a pood cough
medicine. At druggists, price 25 cents.
jnapiosB jnoqii.ii oatAJas jo sjcai uaj
XJ3A9 joj 00$ pus iBpem po3 B aiiaoej
aemj3) ui sjeouiSua aAijotnoooj atjx
Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow's Soothing
Syrup the best remedy to use for their children
during the teething period.
An Incident of History. . .
Julia Ward Howe had just written
"The Battle Hymn of the Republic,"
and was reading it to Elizabeth Cady
Stanton. .
"Well, Lizzie," she asked when she
had finished, "what do yon think of
"Great!" was the reply. "But you
are boosting man again in defiance of
our glorious principles. Sit down new
and write another to be ca.'led 'The
Battle Her of the Republic " New
York Telegram.
The Great Nonesuch Remedy
, di The old monk cure, strong,
I straight, sure, has for a large
part of a century battled with
V JK m and conquered
JACUIS AchesabdPaihs
A Candid Child.
Lady Visitor Yonr little girl seems
to be very much taken with me, Mrs.
Boston Transcript.
-AVkgetable Preparaiionfor As
similating the Food andBeguIa
ling ttieStoinachs andBowels of
Promotes Digetion.CheerFul
nessandRestContains neither
Opium,Morplune nor Mineral.
KetiMU SUtt-
hin Soul -
A perfect Remedy forConstipa
Tion, Sour Stomach.Diarrhoea
Worms .Convulsions .Feverish
ness and Loss OF SLEEP.
Facsimile Signature of :
Goto mo'm row brfohf! mhiS fmtm
morally rll ci al io ouarantoed fff ffirt iNWrwfrwvAs. Amk dtarif r we
Writ for Imam booklot how to dya, blaach and mix co or. MO It ROE DRUG
Motherly Advice.
"Johnny," said the Cleveland moth
er, "I want you to quit using such lan
guage as that"
"Why, mother," replied Johnny,
"Shakespeare said "what I just said."
"Then you must quit associating
with him," rejoined the cautious wom
an. "He's not a tit companion for
How's This? -
We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward for
any case of Catarrh that cannot he cured by
Ball's Catarrh Cure.
: F.J. CHENEY & CO., Props., Toledo, O.
I We, the undersigned, have known F. J.
Cheney for the last 15 years, and believe him
perfectly honorable in all business transac
tions and financially able to carry out any ob
ligations made by their firm.
. West & Xbuax, Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, O.
, Waldinq, Kimnan & Mabvin, Wholesale Drug
gists. Toledo, O.
Hall's Catarrh Cure is taken internally, act.
Ing directly upon the blood and mucous sur-
. faces of the system. Price 75c per bottle.
bold dt ail Druggists, testimonials tree.
Hall's Family Pills are the best
Indignant American Why is it, sir.
that in Russia there is such prejudice
against the Hebrews?
Cultivated Russian Because the He
brews are a q-iiet, inoffensive people,
who attend strictly to their own affairs,
and do excellent work for fair wages,
just as the Chinese do in this country.
Itching Blind, Bleeding ot Protruding Piles
Your druggist will refund money If PAZO OINT
MKNT taus to cure you in ti to 14 days. oOc
Having sung a requiem into a phono
graph, a Schleswig doctor has left in
structions in his will that the music shall
be reproduced at his funeral.
You Can Get Allen's Foot-Ease FREE.
Write Allen S. Olmsted, Le Eoy,N. Y., for a
free sample of Allen's Foot-Ease. It cures
sweating, hot swollen, aching feet.. It makes
aew or tight shoes easy. A certain cure for
corns, lnerowinenails and bunions. Alldroe-
gists sell it. 25c. Don't accept any substitute.
It matters little whether a man be
mathematically or philosophically, or
aristocratically cultivated, so he be but
cultivated. Goethe.
Fastest, lightest and strongest Stump Puller
on the market. 119 Horse power on the sweep
with two horses. Write tor descriptive catalog
and prices. -
Foot of Morrison Street Portland. Oregon
Forest reserve script for securing title
in any quantity to farming, grazing,
desert or timber land without residence
or improvement for saleatlowestmark
et prices. H. M. HAMILTON,
The Portland, Portland, Or.
the world over,
and 50c.
Price 25c.
A Contrary Opinion.
"There are few great actors left",
said the man who takes a melancholy
view of things.
"On the contrary," answered Mr.
Storinington Barnes, with a touch of
asperity, "great actors are, to my per
sonal knowledge, getting left every
season." Washington Star.
For Infants and Children.
The Kind You Have
Always Bought
coto thmn mry other cjre. Of 10o
iture I Aw
W$ Use
For Over
THSMmsun wsmw. m vom ottt. -
, He who knows not what it is to labor,
knows not what it is to enjoy. Joy.
Kyou want to get the .',,
yon can't afford
o plant anything bat
the standard after 49 years'
test. They always produce
Uie largest ana surest
crops. All dealers sell
them. Our 105 fl
teeed Annual jfx&--
free on request. FfftB
D. M. Ferry & Oo.V
60,000 Plants f37l6s.
e K"irut?;ir) sua laiiun his iia.iii7u
'AmnrinL Tli Am i reason for this.
KiuzAr's seeua TJian u v vtuer iu
Pe own over 6.000 acres for the pro
duction or our wa.rra.niea Keeas
order to induce you to cry tnera, we
mace you me louowug uujn i
foi-13 Cents Postpaid
rfdHnnfl oner:
lltOOKnrlv. Mtdhim and Li C abbaffW
I20O0 Fine Juley Timlpt,
zuuu hi men in veiery,
SOOO Kiel. Butty Jtteet
1000 Splewlltl Onion,
lOOO Karfe Lonclon Karflinen, f
lllftA filorlnnal. Ur(irl,.ni K-LawsW-aU
AKnvA cnrn rnslra iroK nnntain amfTl ar)
dent seed to rrow 10.000 plants, fur-
nishlng bnhel or nriiiiuns
sowers ana tots ana iocsoi chum
vegetables, together with our great
catalog1 , telling' all about Flowers,
Eoses, Small Fruits, etc., all for
16c in stamps and this notice
mg uu-page catalog aioue, to.
r-.oj, ua wrosse, wis.
"Largot seller in tin World."
Dr. G. Gee Wo
Wcnftrful Koxb
This wonderful Chi
nese doctor is called
great because he cures
people without opera
tion that are given up
to die. He cures with
those wonderful Chi
nese herbs, roots, buds,
barks and veeei ables
that are entirely un
known to medical sci
ence in this country. Through the use of those
harmless remedies this famous doctor knows
the action of over 500 different remedies which
be successfully uses in different diseases. He
guarantees to cure catarrh, asthma, lung, throat,
rheumatism, nervousness, stomach, liver, kid
neys, etc; has hundreds of testimonials.
Charges moderate. Call and see him. Patients
out of the city write for blanks and circulars.
The C. Gea Wo Chinese Medicine Co.
Mention naner
V .
To Convince You
-- the market, I will semi you one,
freight prepaid, and wait for my
pay until October 1, 1905.". "
It was given the highest award
at the Oregon State Fair, held at
Salem last f ill. - Write fi r our '
Descriptive Catalogue of Incuba-
: tors and Brooders and oar time
proposit'o 1.
DcpL 12 Portland, Oregon
P, N. U.
No. 61905
TTTHEN writln g to Kdvertisers pleaa
1 V menuom iou ppr.
pmcktoircolo mtttkp woo mnd cot on
mrlll and tromtpald 10o paoki.O'
CO., UnliavLla, MlaaourL