Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About Corvallis gazette. (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 13, 1903)
A Phonetic Similarity. "So you .are going to take your airship and go hdme?" "I am," answered the aeronaut. "Simply because funds are not forthcoming?" "Precisely. You have In your own language, if I remember it correctly, a proverb which says, 'Money makes the air blow.'" Washington Star. For coughs and colds there Is no better medicine than Piso's Cure for Consump tion. Price 25 cents. Appropriate. A New York church will group all Its various activities in one big sky scraper. There seems to be some thing appropriate in churches resort ing to skyscrapers. Philadelphia Ledger. - Mothers will find Mrs. vvlnslow's Sooth ing Syrup the best remedy to use lor their Record Offertory. Australia's biggest offertory was taken up at the consecration of the Bishop of Carpentaria in Sydney ca thedral. It ayaounted to 8,500, and is perhaps the largest on record. CITC Permanently Cured fto Jits or nervonsnes f 1 1 0 after first day's meof Dr. Kline's Great Nerv Restorer. Send for Fit E E Si. 00 trial bottle and treat fee. Db-B. H. Klins. Ltd- U31 Arch SU Philadelphia. P A Pleblaa Taint. "No, her father made her break the engagement." "What was the trouble?" - "The old man discovered that one of the young fellow's ancestors had been a store waiter in a rolling mill, or something." Cleveland Plain Dealer. The New Year. If you don't mind hearing about a good thing more than once, we want to tell you that the most delicious canned peaches and pears and strawberries and ot er fruits are called Monopole. If yon ask us what Monopole means we'll tell you "Monopole means the best," and it dees. Many of our friends tell us the same thing. Get Monopole goods from your dealer. Wadhame & Kerr Bros., packers, Portla.id, Ore. Sparkling Stones. Husband I don't believe you heard a word of the sermon today. You were looking the whole time at the diamonds that woman in front of us wore. - Wife Well, there are sermons in stones, you know. Puck. Like a King. Porus, the Indian prince, had just been taken prisoner when Alexander asked him how he expected to be treated. "Like a king!" replied the eastern warrior. Pleased by the manliness of the an swer, Alexander immediately made him janitor of the Flatiron apartment house and the two potentates stuck so closely to business as to be dubbed porous plaster. New York Sun. 20 MILLION BOTTLES GOLD EVERT YEAR. Sir? Happiness is the absence of pain, and mil lions have been made happy through being cured by St Jacobs Oil of RHEUMATISM, NEURALGIA, TOOTHACHE, HEAD ACHE. LAMENESS, SCALDS. BURNS. SPRAINS. BRUISES and all pains for which , an external remedy can be applied. It never fails to cure. Thousands who have been de clared incurable at baths and In hospitals have thrown away their crutches, being cured after using St. Jacobs Oil. Directions in eleven languages accompany every bottle. " For six years I was a victim of d y pepaia in its worst form. I could eat nothing but milk toast, and at times my stomach would not retain and digest even that, Last March I began taking CASCAKETS and since then I have steadily improved, until I am as well as I ever was in my life." David H. Mcbfht, Newark. O. Pleasant. Palatable. Potent. Taste Good. Do Bood, .Never BicJten. w eaten, or unpe. luc, 25c, too. ... CURE CONSTIPATION. ... BUrilat Cwfui, Cfcleat. MeatrMl, Raw Terk. SU MA Tfl DIP Bold and gnaranteed by all drug HUa I UDU sista to CtKK Tobacco Habit. Canada Consumes Much Tea. Canada, with its 5,000,000 inhabi tants, consumes as much India tea as does the United States, with a popu lation fifteen times as great; each used last year 1,075,000 pounds.' " I was given up to die with qtick consumption. I then began to ase Ayer's Cherry Pectoral. I improved at once, and am now in perfect health." Chas. E. Hart man, Gibbstown, N. Y. It's too risky, playing with your cough. The first thing you know it will be down deep in your lungs and the play will be over. Be gin early with Ayer's Cherry Pectoral and stop f me cuugu. - Tare that : 25c, 50c, $1. All droziiits. Consult yonr doctor. If he says take it, then do as be says. If be tells yon not to take it, then don't take it. Be knows. Lear It with him. We are willing. J. O.AYBB CO., Lowell, Haas. yjp CANDY 'Nw TRADE MARK MOmrtnp IACKAOH Backache is a forerunner and one of the most common symp toms of kidney trouble and womb displacement. READ MISS BOLLMAN'S EXPERIENCE. " Some time ago I was in a very weak condition, my work made me nervous and my back ached frightfully all the time, and I had terrible head aches. " My mother got a bottle of Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com pound for me, and it seemed to strengthen my back and help me at once, and I did " not get so tired as before. I continued to take it, and it brought health and strength to me, and 1 1 want to thank you for the good it has done me." Miss Katk Boll, man, 142nd St. & Wales Ave., New York 'City. $5000 forfeit If original of about letter proving genuineness cannot be produced. Liydia E. Pinkliam's Vegetable Compound cures because it is the greatest known remedy for kidney and womb troubles. Every woman wbo is puzzled about ber condition should write to Mrs. Pinkham at Lynn, Mass and. tell ber aJl. YOU'LL BE SORRY WHEN IT RAINS IP YOU DONT HAVE :the genuine VA 0ILBI2 KEEP YOU DRY MADE POa WET WOSsK. Bl BLACK AND YELLOW SOLD BY ALL RELIABLE DEALERS AK9 BACKS) BY OUR GUARANTEE. . A. cl. TOWER CO.. BOSTON. MAS5. Women Landowners. One in seven of British land owners are women. In all there are about 88,000 women who own land in Eng land and Wales. Work for Women. In the packing and canning factor ies wamerr have largely taken the places of men, and if trade increases as it has done in the last two or three years thousands more will find" em ployment there. Their labor is light, being what is termed "kitchen work," which consists of cutting dried beef, stuffing sausages, packing tins, etc. HOWS THIS? We oSer One Hundred Dollars Reward for an? ease of Cattarrh that can not be cored by HaU'i Catarrh Cure. F. J. CHENEY & Co., Props. , Toledo, O. We the undersigned, have known F. J. Cheney for the past 15 years, and believe him perfectly honorable in all business transactions and fin ance ally able to carry out any obligations made by their firm, Wkst & Truax, Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, Walding Kinnan 5t Marvin, . Wholesale Druggists, Toledo. O. Hall's Catarrh Core is taken internally, acting directly on the blood and mucous surfaces of the system. Price 75c per bottle. Sold by all Sruggists. Testimonials free. Hall's Family Pills are the best. Real Summer Girl. "Say, old man, what is a summer girl?" . "A summer girl is a rack to stretch shirt waists on; inside is a receptacle for lobster salad and ice cream, while outside is an attachment for diamond rings." Life. Spanish Railway Schedules. Spanish trains so seldom leave sta tions on time that the time-tables in many cases merely indicate the hour of departure say, eight and "minu tos" that is, an indefinite number of minutes after eight. - Dr. August Koenig's Hamburg Drops, as a blood purifier, strength and health restorer, and a specific for all stomach, liver and kidney troubles, leads all other similar medicines in its wonder ful sales and marvelous confidence oi the people, especially our vast German population. It is not a new and un tried product, but was made and sold more than sixty years ago. Men's Reasons for Marrying. Postal cards having been sent out to married men with the inquiry, "Why did you marry?" a large number of re plies came to hand, from which the following are selected: "That's what I have been trying for eleven years to find out." X. "Married to get even with her moth er, but never have. W." . "Because Sarah told .me that five other young men had proposed to her. C." "The father thought eight years' courtin' was almost long enough. B." "Please don't stir me up. J" "Because I thought she was one among a thousand; now I sometimes think she is a thousand among one. E." "Because I did not have the experi ence I have now. G." "That's the same question my friends ask me. C. H." . "Because I had more money than I knew what to do with. Now I have more to do than I have money with. B. D." "I wanted a companion of the oppo site sex. P. S. She is still opposite. A." "Because it is just my luck. P. J." "I yearned for company. We now have it all the time. Karl." "Have exhausted all the figures in . the arithmetic to figure out an answer to your question; between multiplica tion and division, in the family, and distraction, in addition, the answer is hard to arrive at. Old Man." "I married to get the best wife in the world. Simon." "Because I asked her if she'd have me. She said she would. She g got am It is 300 years since the Bodleian Library was opened at Oxford. There are now ten Jewish M. P.'s in the British House of Commons. Among the birds shot recently near Colchester, England, was a 6tormy petrel. Four new lighthouses have been erected recently on the coasts of the Red Sea. Mixed bathing will be permitted next year at the majority of German sea side resorts. Seagulls have ousted the penguins from their rocks in the St. Jamas' Park Lake, London. By the sale of stray dogs the North umberland (England) County Council made 4 10s 6d last year. "Brightening their . Intellect" is a Birmingham (England) euphemism for violent assaults on the police. The Gemshall Sparrow Club, Surrey, England, has accounted for 25,702 birds during the last six years. Pudsey Yorkshire, England) Me chanics' Institute has purchased a mill in which to hold technical classes. Maria Schemmer, a St. Louis woman, unable to read or write, died recently, leaving an estate valued at $200,000. Cardinal Svampe, the archbishop of Bologna, Italy, has forbidden the priests in his diocese to use bicycles. There has been a decrease of 1.5 per cent in the population of the Isle of Man since 1901. At the last census it was 54,752. f Specimens of four, five, six, seven, eight and nine-leaved clovers have been presented to Queen Alexandra by a Welsh lady. One hundred thousand replicas pf a special medal struck to commemorate Mr. Chamberlain's tour have been or dered for the Cape. Among the 5,000 tramway car driv ers and conductors In Vienna there are stated to be 400 knights, 50 barons and 4 counts, besides other noblemen. Nelson's old ship, the Victory, Is still to be accessible to the British public, although she Is shortly to be super seded as the admiral's flagship at Portsmouth. Water is so scarce in the Japanese island of Oshima that it is the custom for a bride to take a large tub of drink ing water with her to her new home as a kind of dowry. Ocos, formerly one of the principal Mexican ports on the Pacific coast, has almost completely disappeared in the sea owing to the sinking of the harbor bottom after an earthquake. Military spectators present at the review of the Argentine army are re ported to have said that the evolutions and appearance of the troops were worthy of the best organized armies. Thirty thousand dollars was paid re cently for a bronze statue of Hercules at the concluding sale of the Bardlni collection In London. -The total amount realized by the entire collection was I22S.640. Scotch lassies dressed in tartan cos tumes will act as waitresses at a num ber of refreshment depots to be opened in London,- where oatmeal In various forms, from porridge to puddings and cake, will be offered to customers. In speaking on the advisability of curtailing the study of the , dead lan guages, a subject now Interesting edu cators in Great Britain, Professor Kirkpatrlck, of the chair of history. In the University of Edinburgh, is quoted as saying: "Indispensable as the study of Latin once was in higher education, that of one's own language and other modern tongues has now be come more so." The success of the free employment bureaus in Illinois seems to carry en couragement for those who think that such establishments should be provid ed in every State. During the last year a total of 27,779 men and 14,134 wossen applied for help, and work was found for nearly 24,000 men and 13,000 women. - For the three years the offices have been In existence In Chicago and Peoria, 90,000 out of 110,000 applicants have been provided with employment. Of applicants for assistance there were 56,000 and 43,500 of these aided. Bishop Partridge, of Japan, journey ed all the way to New York City in order to take part in the missionary conference of the Protestant Episcopal church. In doing so he furnished ex traordinary proof of the perfection of modern transportation facilities. He wrote to a relative in Brooklyn, giving details and Itinerary of his trip, which was to be as fast as he could possibly make It. The bishop crossed 6,000 miles of water and 3,000 of land, arriving In the Grand Central station, New York, exactly at the minute named In his letter from Japan. Prince Jonah Kunls Kalaulauole, who represents Hawaii in the next House of Representatives, Is the first royal person to enter the Congress of the United States. Already there Is much speculation as to just how he will be addressed. He is called- at home "Prince Cupid." Those who want to avoid such familiarity designate him as Prince Kunio, which is correct. Some may Insist on "Mr. Kalaulauole," but the name is so long and so intri cate in vowels that it is feared few who are not- acquainted with the Kanaka language will care to try it. Among the many human curios to be seen at Monte Carlo this season none attracts more attention than. M. Ytur bide, an eccentric millionaire, who shuns daylight as he would a plague. In his splendid villa he has placed an enormous elevatdr, Into which his cur tained and shuttered carriage is driven and raised to his heavily draped apart ment when he wishes to take a drive. His rooms are always kept at a Turk ish bath temperature, and as condi tions in the gambling rooms of the Casino are about the same, he some times ventures there in the evening. The follo'wing inscription has been placed above the grave of the late editor of the New York Evening Post, at Hazelbeach, England: "Edwin Law rence Godkin, Publicist, Economist, Moralist: born at Moyne, Wicklow, 1831; died at Greenway, Devon, 1902. For forty years a citizen of the United States. Gifted with a penetrating In tellect and singular powers, of expres sion; constant in friendship; tireless in energy; dauntless In courage; a stead fast champion of good causes and high ideals, he became' a foremost part in all efforts to make government just, pure and efficient, and wrought unceas ingly to strengthen the ties between the nation whence he sprang and that to which his services were given through a long and laborious life." EAT LOTS OF CANDY. A Vast Amount Consumed in United States Brooklynitea Lik It. The United States is the largest candy producer in the world, and probably also the largest consumer. The use of the article is no longer con fined to the young, and the business has grown greatly 'of late years, so that to-day there 'are some extensive establishments, in Brooklyn as else where, where customers throng at all hours. In some of these places hun dreds of persons are employed. It is stated that there is more money in the sale than in the manufacture of candy. A witness not long ago stated in court .that the retailer's profit was 250 per cent. The process of the manufacture of this article may be briefly described. The sugar is boiled down in big ket tles that hold about 1,000 pounds. Then it is" drawn into other kettles, from -which nearly all the air is ex cluded, and subjected to a tremen dous heat. This" process removes all Impurities and prevents the candy from sticking. It is then drawn out and colored, and made into sticks. There is a ma chine for sizing these, one for cutting caramels, and. In fact, machines for converting the candy into all kinds of shapes. . Gums of all kinds are in demand now. The substance is first boiled and then dropped into molds of various shapes and sizes. Chocolate drops are made with cream and chocolate. The .mixture is boiled and beaten and shaken and heated ; and cooled, and squeezed and shaped, and, In fact, passes through so many different pro cesses that it is a wonder It survives. The crystal for crystallized bon-bona is produced., by pouring sugar syrup over candy. It is only the very lowest grades of candy that is injurious. The great manufacturers take care that every article used in the business is of good quality, as it has been found that the public judgment in this mat ter Is fairly accurate. Brooklyn Citi zen. KING EDWARD'S NEW FAD. He la Much Interested in His Rac ing Pigeons. The royal aviary at Frogmore is now In the possession of the Queen Alexan dra and its resources are to be devel oped along the lines of her own prefer ences. Two hundred feet in length, it comprises eighteen poultry runs, and the upper part , of the building is de signed as a pigeon loft. Here, perhaps. King Edward may keep some of the racing pigeons to which he has been devoting some attention of late, and the pouters, tumblers and' turtles which are at present in residence, to the number of about seventy, may be to some extent gradually displaced. The fowls include a pen of sliver-spangled Hamburgs. The egg production of the royal aviary for many years has averaged an annual output of 20,000. All the world has heard of the au dacious cockatoo,' answering to the sobriquet of "Cockie," who for many years was installed in solitary state in the Queen's dressing room. But its screeching was a sore trial for the household generally, and a home was found for it in the residence of the kennel man. The bird, which should not be confounded with a still more famous one that lived many years ago at Sandringham, a reputed relic from the Georgian era, would permit no familiarities, except from the hands of its sympathetic, owner, who would gravely stroke Its denuded poll and chide It for the dissolute habit it had of plucking out its feathers in summer time. Cockie used to amuse himself in a battle-royal of oratory aimed at the little green par rot which was picked up by the King one day from a boy who was offer ing it for sale in Trafalgar Square. Tramp Was Hungry. Among the stories told to the Chris tian Endeavorers while they were in Boston was one concerning a peri patetic of the bare-footed variety and a farmer, who was also a chuch dea con. The deacon was taking lunch un der his own vine and fig tree and unto him the peripatetic said: "Sir, I'm very hungry." "You haven't been shaved," replied the deacon. "No, but I'm very hungry." "You're very dirty, into the bar gain." "Yes, but I'm very hungry." "Well, can you say the Lord's pray er?" "No, I can't." "Will -you say It for. a piece of bread?" -"I will." The deacon started In with "Our Father," at the same time cutting off a slice as he enunciated the words, says the Boston Herald. "The tramp repeated "Our Father," -then suddenly asked: "Did you say 'Our Father?' " "Yes, 'Our Father.' V "Stop just a moment," continued the dirty man. "You mean your father and my father?" . - "I do," answered the deacon. "Then we are brothers," triumphant ly proceeded the unshaved. "We are." "Then, for' our father's sake, cut that bread thicker and cut it quicker." Reign of the Kitchen Queen. Muggins My cook left because we refused to treat her as one of the fam ily. Buggins Humphf My cook expects to be treated as company. Philadel phia Record. Wiser. jerry Is the world getting better? Jack It Is getting wiser; I have an awful time trying to borrow money. PROMINENT PHYSICIANS USE AND ENDORSE PE-RU-NA. CB. CHAHBERLIN, M.D. OF WASHINGTON.D.C. C. B. Chamber 1 in, M. D., writes from 14th and P Sts., Washington, D., C. : "Many cases have come under my observation, where -Peruna has benefitted and cured. Therefore, I cheerfully recommend it for catarrh and a general tonic." C. B. CHAMBERLIN, M. D. Medical Examiner V. S. Treasury. Dr. Llewellyn Jordan, Medical Ex aminer of U. S. Treasury Department, graduate of who served Point, has Columbia College, and three years at West the following to say of Pernna: "Allow me to express mv grati tude to you for the benefit d e r i v e d from your wonder ful remedy. One short month has brought forth , a vast change and I now consider my self a well man, and after months of suffering. Fel low sufferers, Pe L. Jordan. PAINLESS Dr. The discovery of new agents and ne netheds of administering the old agents tsed in djntistry for eliminating pain, as revolutionized practice. PAINLESS DENTISTRY with us is not an experi ment, but an ahsolute certainty, a : undreds can testi.'y. Don't you take ny risks. We guarantee "NO PAIN.'' Both 'phones: Oregon South 2291: olumbia SC8. Open evenings till 9 .nuays from 9 to 12. WISE BROS., Dentists. PORTLAND. Settlers on Public Lands. Twenty one million acres of the pub lic lands of the United States are yearly taken up by settlers. One Barrel Not Enough. Irate Customer Look here, you said this gun would shoot 100 yards. I've tried it and it only carries fifty. Isaac Veil, but mine friend, there are two barrels! Glasgow Times. A Family Jar. Mrs. Timmins John, I must say you are the narrowest minded man I ever saw. You have an idea that nobody is ever right but yourself. Mr. Timmins Better look to home. Were you ever willing to admit that anybody was right who differed from you? Mrs. Timmins That's an entirely different thing, and you know it, John Timmins. Boston Transcript. -;...'-V. t- - w &aiMVaiiBtft-J' r--Mi.l"""''. (5TPJ age. m oraer to get us rv yy lV3sJ?w :1 WtVVa beneficial effects it is al- 'K A L. fc:;-r. S J av necessary to buy ffewA, 8&-r&sL runa will Jordan. cure you." Dr. Llewellyn Geo. C. Havener, M, D., of Anacos tia, D. C, writes: The Peruna Medicine Co., Columbus, Ohio: Gentlemen "In my practice I have had occasion to frequently prescribe your valuable medicine, and have found its use beneficial, especially in cases of catarrh." George C. Havener, M. D. If c you do not receive prompt and satisfactory results from the use of Peruna, write at once to Dr. Hartman, giving a full statement of your case, and he will be pleased to give you his valuable advice gratis. Address Dr. Hartman, President of the Hartman Sanitarium, Columbus, Ohio. DENTISTRY 208, 209, 21.', 211, 212, 213, Felling Bldg. Cor. Third and Washington ats. OKEGON. Guide Books Are Barred. A guide book is generally regarded as harmless. - Not so in Turkey, as a German traveler has learned to his ; grief. Officials found in his trunk "a guide through Turkey" and confiscat ed it. The next morning the book was j returned to the German, but with more j than a hundred pages torn out. The traveler went to the censor's office to complain of this inexplicable treat ment of his book. But the censor ex plained to him with itresistible logic that an accurate description of Con stantinople could not be suffered, since a knowledge of the locality was calculated to facilitate an attempt on the sultan's life. Diplomacy. "Whether he needs it or not, every Tiai should try to borrow money so as to learn who his friends aren't, and atso never 10 lend. New York Press ' nr-r -iar rtkAu-u rit!n n THE CHILDREN ENJOY L,ife out of doors and out of the games which they play and the enjoy ment which they receive and the efforts which they make, comes the greater part of that healthful development which is so essential to their happiness when grown. When a laxative is needed the remedy which is g-iven to them to cleanse and sweeten and strengthen the internal organs on which it acts, should be such as physicians would sanction, because its component parts are known to be wholesome and the remedy itself free from every objectionable quality. The one remedy which physicians and parents, well-informed, approve and recommend and which the little ones enjoy, because of its pleasant flavor, its gentle action and its beneficial effects, is Syrup of Figs and for the same reason it is the only laxative which should be used by fathers and mothers. , Syrup of Figs is the only remedy which acts gently, pleasantly and naturally without griping, irritating, or nauseating and which cleanses the system effectually, without producing that constipated habit which results from the use of the old-time cathartics and modern imitations, and against which the children should be so carefully guarded. If you would have them grow to manhood and womanhood, strong, healthy and happy, do not give them medicines, when medicines are not needed, and when nature -needs assistance in the way of a laxative, give them only the simple, pleasant and gentle Syrup of Figs. Its quality is due not only to the excellence of the combination of the laxative principles of plants with pleasant aromatic syrups and juices, but also to our original method of manufacture and as you value the health of the little ones, do not accept any of the substitutes which unscrupulous deal ers sometimes offer to increase their profits.' The genuine article may be bought anywhere of all reliable druggists at fifty cents per bottle. Please to remember, the full name of CALIFORNIA FIG SYR. UP the front of every pack age. In order to get its beneficial effects it is al ways necessary to buy the genuine .only. CURES WHEHE ALL ELSE FAILS. uuugn eyrop. Tastes uooa. ua in time, sola Dy arueirists. JOHN POOLE, PORTLAND, ORE. Foot of Morrison Street. Can give you the best bargains in Boilers and Engines, Windmills, Pumps and Gene ral Machinery. Wood Sawing Machines a specialty. See us before buying. X WAV ABOVE all the rest is the quality of MONOPOLE T Canned Fruits and Vegetables. You won't be satisfied with anything else T J after you once try them. From your grocer. WADHAMS & KERR BROS. Packers mm Seeds art slanted by farmer ana sruener wbo h& stouDCd exDrimentiiiE. it pay a to pay a little more forFGrrr'ft &nd rean .m-Mt deal more fit ihfl TinnML All dealer. ltOS flped Annual postpaid free to all applicants. D. M. FERRY 4. CO.. Detroit, Mich. it costs You iNothing To catch cold you get s miethlng for nothing, sure enough. You can lcep it if you want it, but you can get rid of it by using Queen Bee Cougrh Drops. Keep a box In the house. They taste nice, look nice, are nice. Made of honey and menthol. 5 Cents a box. Sold by all druggists and con fectioners. Tw) boxes sent by mail postpaid on receipt of 10c in stamps. Pacific Coast Biscuit Co. Portland, Ore. P. N. U. No. 2 1903. HEN writing to advertisers please mention tins paper. Showed Good Sense. A Lewision, Me., infant, asked by his" Sunday school teacher what he should have done first of all if he had been miraculously cast out of the whale's belly like Jonah, s.aid: "I fink I'd gone home and got some clean clothes on." rter s Little Liver Pills. Must Bear Signature of Set Facsimile Wrapper Below. Very small and as easy to take as sugar. F08 BEADA&HS. FC3 DIZZINESS. FCS BlUOUSKESt. FOB TORPID LIYERr FCR C0M3TIPATIQH. FCS SALLOW SKI M. F08 THE COMPLEXION . OXOraXKD HUT have HflHATtmr. iScSntt I Purely Teetale.W! CURE SICK HEADACHE. At i5W the Company CO. - " prmtea on . : r. ill Best Genuine j wcl I I CARTERS IpSTTLE . IfiVER urn i L, - i -s VI me. Blivins."