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About Corvallis gazette. (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 20, 1901)
"torpedo boat, hjlton,
NE of the most remarkable tests
sound recently. For fifteen hours
least eight feet of water washing
John Lowe and Captain Frank T. Cable. The men suffered no inconveniences whatever. They slept, ate, read and
played cards. They knew nothing of a fierce storm which was raging over them, wrecking vessels and destroying prop
erty. The test demonstrated that the vessel could remain under water for weeks as well as hours, so far as the ques
tion of pure air was concerned. None of the air contained in the four flasks was used, and yet when the boat arose the
air in it was pure and wholesome. The question of the air supply being settled, the time which the vessel can remain
submerged depends entirely upon the amount of food and fuel which it can carry. The boat was not damaged in any
way on account of resting on the bottom and was safe from the winds and waves above. This proves that such a boat
in case of a storm at sea could quickly sink from danger. Should a hostile boat threaten it the little wonder could disap
pear beneath the waves and if necessary remain out of sight and danger for days.
The marvelous boat is of the same style as the original Holland submarine vessel, but great improvements have beem
made in the apparatus which controls it. Experts are of the opinion that the boat is now the highest type of submarine
craft. Its speed is from 7 to 9 knots an hour. It is the belief that two such boats could successfully guard any harbor
or destroy a hostile fleet. It is probable that in the near future such boats will form an important, if not the atost impor
tant, part of onr navy, and may be the cause of revolutionizing the naval architecture of the world.
A FAMILY MATTER.
She cewed a button on my coat,
I watched the fingers nimble;
Sometimes I held her spoil of thread.
And sometimes held her thimble.
"I'm glad to do it, since you're far
From sister and from mother.
" 'Tis such a thing," she said, and smiled,
"As I'd do for my brother."
The fair head bent so close to me
My heart was wildly beating;
She seemed to feel my gaze, looked up,
And then our glances meeting,
She flushed a ruddy, rosy red,
And I, I bent and kissed her.
" 'Tis such a thing," I murmured low,
"As I'd do to my sister."
Forty-six Minutes with Death
HE strike at the, "Foundry,"
M starting from comparatively
small grievances, had thanks to
the influence of a few of the leaders
reached a state where satisfactory set
tlement seemed impossible. The men
had expected to be jmt a week, or ten
-days-at the most, but nearly two
"months had elapsed, and their position
was almost desperate. Several depu
tations had waited on old Mr. Vice, the
proprietor, but had been invariably re-
ferred back to the manager, with the
understanding that he had full authorl-
ty to deal wun mem.
The manager, Shotwell, a young man
- -v i "1
HE STBOVE TO SHAKE HIMSELF.
' of intelligent (sympathies, from the first
had been willing ,even eager, to discuss
the men's grievances and help them to
an understanding. But when he found
that the leaders, to whom the men had
intrusted their cause, not only were dis
posed to take advantage of his justice,
but were seeking their own ends, at the
. expense of the men, he suddenly
.changed his attitude and refused to lis
ten to any proposals other than abso
lute surrender. He gave the three lead
ers to understand in the plainest lan
; guage that under ; no consideration
. would he tolerate their presence in the
The result of this understanding and
. the contemptuous way in which the
manager had expressed his opinion of
fthe leaders and their scheming roused
these men from sullen spite to hatred.
They could not keep the men back or
- get back themselves unless well, un
less Shotwell changed his mind, and
they knew him too well to hope for
Shotwell's obstinacy had surprised
even old Mr. Vice, who had known him
from boyhood known him so well, in
fact, that he had sanctioned the young
. man's engagement to Dorothy,- his
daughter. It was possibly the thought
- of a future partnership that made him
so determined to stand to his guns now
and show the old man and his sweet -
heart that he was capable of holding
, the reins.
, Even Dorothy's lover hardly under-
.stood her. She had strange ideas of.
! "soul communion" that made the mat -
ter-of-fact young man gasp; and she
: had an uncanny knack of demoustrat-
ing the proof of her beliefs by reading
his unspoken thoughts with an accu -
racy that, to a less healthy, wholesome
.young fellow, might have been embar -
grassing. But withal she was so worn-
- anly and tender, and her fancies so
pretty, that gradually he grew used to
them, and found himself often linger-
lng over tbem and almost wishing they
could be true.
"---' '" 1
remains under water
FOR A PERIOD OF FIFTEEN HOURS.
SUBMARINE BOAT AS IT APPEARS
in the history of the Lnited Mates navy was successfully made m Long Island
the Holland submarine boat, Fulton, lay on the bottom of the sound with at
over fier decks. Within the steel shell were eight men, including Rear Admiral
To one of these fancies he had readily
yielded; each evening both sat wher
ever they might be in silence for a lit
tle time and let their thoughts go out
freely to each other. "Soul talks,"
Dorothy called them; and whatever
they were, the result was that his love
for the girl grew more tender, and he
knew that in some subtle manner he
was coming to understand her better
and better each day. These times had
been inexpressibly dear to him of late.
They were his moments of absolute
rest from the worry of the strike, and
he always felt his brain refreshed, and ,
afterward was better able to cope with
his growing difficulties.
The pulse of the strike was growing
feverish, and night after night Shot
well had slept at the. office, fearing
some kind of an attack on the premises.
By the end of the week worry and lack
of sleep had told heavily upon him, and
as he sat smoking In the mysterious
shadows he determined tha.t this must
be his last night alone; he would get a
watchman to aid him. His thoughts
grew vague and mixed; his pipe fell to
the floor and made him jump, then his
eyes closed for a moment, opened slug
gishly, dropped again and he was fast
With a start and a fearful sense of
oppression he awoke, struggling wildly
in his chair tried to cry out, and real
ized that he was tied down. A cloth
was wound tightly over his mouth.
while the room was filled with a subtle,
sickly odor of chloroform. He heard a
sneering laugh behind his chair, and
..Wel yer took a purty good nap tnat
time, didn't yer?" There was an an
swering growl from anoeher throat,
and the two men came round In front,
both muffled in heavy coats, and pieces
of cloth covering the upper half of their
faces. One of them carried a small
black box somewhat gingerly to the
desk and sat it down in front of Shot
well. He turned a little brass key in
it and hidden machinery began to tick
tack, tick-tack, like a clock. He twist
ed the box around and Shotwell saw a
small, dial, with the hands pointing to
9:50 o'clock. One of the men attached
one end of a string to a lever on the
box, and with the greatest precaution
tied the other end to Arthur's left wrist.
Now, see here, Mr. Shotwell, you've got
just forty-six minutes, and then that
thing goes off, and God have mercy on
your soul. If ye should want the thing
to go quicker just struggle hard, and if
ye manage to pull either of them
strings, well, I guess it'll oblige ye.'"
"Now, Bill, we've got no time to
waste. Here's the keys; you go for the
safe and I'll fix the desk."
Inside of fifteen minutes Shotwell's
guests had gone, leaving little trace of
their visit except a faint odor of chloro
form, and that strange-looking black
box, with its montonous tick-tack, tick
tack. The whole thing had happened so
U suddenly, and his brain' was so heavy
with the drug, that the men were gone
before he fully realized the horror of
his position. As It dawned on him he
could not believe It was true; It was
some terrible nightmare. He strove to
shake himself, but the tightening of the
strings on his wrists and a half jar In
the tones of that ceaseless tick-tack
brought him back to bis senses with
a chill of horror. He glared terror
stricken at the little clock . that was
ticking off the moments of his life a
second each time. A few more minutes
and then he broke out into a cold
sweat; an unmanning fear of this un
known, cruel thing crept over him, and
for a while he sat, huddled in abject
terror; then slowly the soul of the man
steadied itself; he closed his eyes to
pray, and the word that came was
"Dorothy." With a fierce mental effort
he pulled together his shaken faculties
for her sake. For her he would die like
a man. Perhaps she would know he
had been no coward.
Tick-tack, tick-tack, twenty minutes
' past 10. Ah! it was time to sit and talk
to "Dorrie." Well, be would do It
would give to her those last twenty
minutes. And so he sat on, his face
drawn and ghastly, but his courage
! firm sat and bade a long good-by to
' the girl he loved; thought strong, manly
thoughts to her, that kept fear from bis
heart But while his inmost self talked
j with "Dorrie" his flesh grew gray and
pinched, the lonely silence broken only
'by the steady ticking of his clock of
' Dorothy that night sat reading; then
later fell to wondering of Arthur alone
iu that great building, and at the
thought of his loneliness all her heart
, went out to bimj and perhaps tome of
her soul, for her body fell asleep. Then
she, too, woke with a start a start of
perplexity and fear; fear for Arthur
what was it? She passed her hand over
her forehead, bewildered. What was It
why could she not remember? Then
the ticking of the clock on the mantel
caught her ear caught it strangely,
and she listened, breathless, trembling;
tick-tack, tick-tack what did it mean?
Then slowly and softly a solemn voice
fell on her inner ear: "Good-by, Dorrie;
"Ah!" she rose to her full height was
rigid there for an Instant, then quietly:
"Yes, I know; I understand." She
walked quietly to her father's room,
took his keys, and, taking her hat and
coat, slipped unseen out into the night.
Tick-tack, tick-tack, eight minutes
"Eight minutes; eight years; God!
Can I wait? One brave spring now
would end the torture, and no, no, for
Dorrie's sake, for the honor of love, I'll
live my life out to the last bitter seo
ond." Shotwell closed his eyes a few
moments, then opening them, saw a
face to the doorway gazing at him; to
him it seemed the soul of Dorrie, come
to say "good-by."
He was not afraid, hardly awed; It
was not real; dying men's eyes are
sometimes strangely clear; he noticed
the hat, the coat; the face drawn with
fearful anguish souls did not look like
that it was Dorrie herself. A moment
of wild joy was swallowed up In a still
greater horror "Dorrie!" here, with
that thing Oh! God; this was worst of
all but her quick hands touched him,
deftly untieing first the handkerchief
that gagged him, then delicately slip
ping those fearful strings from his
"How long, Arthur?" she'whispered.
He glanced desperately at the clock.
"Two minutes; don't stop to untie me;
water, quick! There's a bucket; fill it
at the tap; it's our only chance."
She comprehended instantly. Oh, how
slow the water ran! She walked swiftly
to the desk, took the box In her hands,
and carried it, ticking, to the bucket;
', placed it in and held it, trembling, as
! the water swallowed it, until there was
, a little rasping jar in the ticking. Shot
; well drew one deep, long breath as he
stooped over the girl and waited for
what never came. One, two, three muv
utes passed; then, with a breath of half
I fearful relief, he looked down at Dorrie.
She was fast asleep, nestled in his arms
and breathing peacefully.
He waked her with a kiss. She stared
at him in sleepy surprise. "Why, Ar
thur! Where am I? What is it, dear?
How white you look; and see, the wa
ter s running au over the noor; you
careless boy I oh, Arthur, I take me
home." Milwaukee Wisconsin.
The Roman Saturnalia.
Feasting and revelry and all the mad
pursuit of pleasure are the features
that seem to have especially marked
this carnival of antiquity, as it went on
for seven days in the streets and public
squares and bouses of ancient Rome
from the seventeenth to the twenty-
third of December. But no feature of
the festival is more remarkable, noth
ing in it seems to have struck the an
cients themselves more than the licensed
granted to slaves at this time. The dis
tinction between the free and the ser
vile classes was temporarily abolished.
The slave might rail at his master, in
toxicate himself like his betters, sit
down at table with them, and not even
a word of reproof would be administer
ed to him for conduct which at any
other season might be punished with
stripes, imprisonment or death. Nay.
more masters actually changed places
with their slaves and waited on them
at table, and not till the serf had done
eating land drinking was the board
cleared and dinner set for his master.
A Peculiar Accident.
A peculiar accident occurred "in
Western town recently. The big Iron
safe in a shoefactory refused to open
and the bookkeeper and engineer con
ceived the idea that they could burn out
the combination by use of carbon and
electricity. It took several hours to
accomplish their purpose, but they
finally succeeded, but not until they had
stood for several hours in the glare of
the electric light taking turns at hold
ing the wire ana carbon. When the
work was over both complained of
dizziness and pain in the head which
increased as the hours passed, and in a
short time both went suddenly blind
at about the same time. All efforts to
restore their sight have been unavail-
! ing, for while the eyeballs appear all
j right, the sight is destroyed.
HOLD MOCK TRIALS.
NOVEL ENTERTAINMENT FOR
CLUBS AND SOCIETY.
Legal Proceedings Gives Opportunity
for Dramatic Display Cnltnre Club
Hear Divorce Case Unrestrained by
Seekers after novel entertainment for
winter evenings have caught upon the
mock trial, which is consequently doing
its turn at popular favor. Fortunately
the trial adapts itself to any company
and may be just as amusing or just as
educational as its managers care to
make 1L It gives opportunity for a play
of wit which livens the monotony of the
regulation court proceeding and it gives
plenty of room for such personal touch
es as will add to the entertainment of
an audience composed of friends of the
players. Moreover, as a large part of
the company can be subpoenaed for the
trial the interest will be most unflag
ging. From the Impaneling of the jury
to the final verdict the audience will
receive enthusiastically every stage of
the trial's procedure.
A ridiculous charge Is brought against
a member of the party; often this is a
club meeting. A young lawyer or law
student is chosen for judge, as he can
at the same time direct the conduct of
the trial. The greatest care is taken
to have everything in strict accordance
with the legal custom and the slightest
deviation from the regular order of trial
is zealously guarded against. The law
yers appear with a burden of dignified
leather-bound volumes, which they con
sult frequently and with ridiculous ef
fect The dignity of the judge is bold
ly overdrawn and his peremptory
rulings Intensified until the figure be
comes a laughable caricature. Primed
for the occasion, the questions and an
swers of the lawyers and their witness-
es are intentioally mirth-provoking and
the stupidity of the jurymen is meant
to add to the fun. I
Although some of the most difficult.
problems of law are thus sometimes
given an airing, a straightforward crim-:
inal case is most frequently chosen as
of greater interest to a fun-seeking com
munity. J. Brown is tried for the mur
der of his sister's cat and a series of
interesting exhibits are shown to prove
the assertion. At the end of several ;
hours of earnest argument J. Brown
clears himself by producing the cat,
which has yowled all evening from its
hiding place under J. Brown's chair.
All of this gives plenty of opportunity
for fun at the expense of Brown and
the members of the court and it also
gives an opening for a display of dra
matic ability, which is another thing
the public is fond of.
Gives Play for dramatic Ability.
Perhaps the most commendable fea
ture of the mock trial is the fact that it
gives opportunity for theatrical ability
or the sensibility of the average person.
Everyone likes dramatic opportunity if
it is not overwhelming, as is so often
the case with the out-and-out amateur
theatricals. Everyone likes the play of
imagination which the trial makes pos
sible and the dramatic incidents which
its development produces. As a spec
tacular performance it pleases the dra
matic sense of everyday people without
displeasing their sense of, congruity in
their own actions.
A trial appeals to the imagination and
to people who know nothing of them
has a fascination and mystery. For
this reason, perhaps, as much as any
other, the mock trial has gamed Its
present popularity. In the rush for the
mysterious which is overwhelming
everyone nowadays the mock trial has
found its place at the head of the list
of entertainments. It has taken its place
as a clever means of home entertain
ment and as a pleasing novelty for
At an evening gathering where some
other form of amusement is the prear
ranged entertainment a mock trail is
often interspersed with the greatest sat
isfaction. The members of the com
pany assume the various roles easily
and if ready of wit can find good oppor
tunity for fun-making. When conduct
ed in this way the trial soon becomes a
battle of jokes in which the cleverest
Is bound to be the victor. And besides
furnishing the most satisfactory enter
tainment for those engaged in the rep
artee It is the greatest fun for the lis
teners, who perhaps can appreciate a
joke even though they cannot make
TIMBER INCREASING IN PRICE.
Product Becoming More Inaccessible
and Therefore More Costly.
In an interesting report on the trade
of Riga, the British consul writes that
"as regards the wood trade of the world
In general, one broad fact is ever be
fore us. It takes from sixty to seventy
years to grow an average convertible
tree and two minutes to hew It down.
Thus eacb year the supply of timber is
diminished, the forest fringe recedes
further and further from the ways and
means of transport; each year the ex
pense of working out the forest Is In-
MOCK TRIAL FOR WINTER EVENINGS.
creased by the extra distance the logs
have to be carried. Then, owing to
the nature and manipulation of the
trade, consumption and supply cannot
keep pace with each other; one is con
tinually catching up the other, and the
consequences are rises and depressions.
"But, in the opinion of all who know
anything about timber and bave studied
the great question of supply, there must
be a steady increase In the price of
every description of wood goods, and
each wave of higher prices will attain
a higher level than Its predecessor.
"As far as the Riga sawing trade Is
concerned, the forests which furnish
the timber are now so fur away from
the rivers which carry the logs that
Riga cannot be supplied unless prices
are fairly high. If 70 per cent of the
cost price of a log In Riga consists of
the expense of bringing it dtwn from
the forests, it is clear that a reduction
can only be made on the remaining 30
"By the remarks I have made I do
not intend to Imply that the supply of
timber is reaching its end. There Is
still plenty of timber, but it la becom
ing comparatively so inaccessible that
in many parts it can only be worked out
when prices rule high. Higher prices
will always render accessible for supply
those forests which it was not consid
ered worth while to work at low rates
It is much the same, in fact, as with
coal and the working of deeper levels."
ARGUMENT THAT FAILED.
How Admiral Kirkland Fqnelchel a
Apropos of the marriage of an impe
cunious ensign in the navy a short time
ago, Gome of the veterans at the navy
yard recall this story of Rear-Admiral
William Kirkland, who was affection
ately known in the navy as "Red Bill."
"A young ensign hesitating found his
way into the admiral's cabin one day,
and with a great deal of circumlocution
and coughing finally let it be known
that he loved the admiral's daughter
and would be the happiest man on
earth if he had her parents' consent to
"No, sir!" thundered the admiral. "No,
siree. Not now, anyhow. No pauper
of an ensign is going to marry my
daughter. You'd better wait until you
are promoted and are able to support
yourself before you think of marrying.
The young officer astounded the ad
miral by not retiring precipitately. He
even ventured the reminder that the ad
miral himself had married when he was
but an ensign, and that bis married life
had been a happy one.
"Red Bill" Kirkland glared at the
presumptuous speaker for a moment
says the New York Times, and then
"I know I married when I was an en;
sign. My- father-in-law supported me
for several years, too, but I'll be hanged
If yours will!"
A Bee as a Barometer.
Such should be the title of these lines,
for whoever observes these interesting
insects finds, it easy enough to foretell
exactly the kind of weather to be ex
pected. At least, that is the opinion
of many raisers of bees.
Generally the bee stays at home when
rain is in the air. When the sky is sim
ply dark and cloudy these busy workers
do not leave their dwelling all at once.
A few go out first, as though the queen
had sent out messengers to study the
state of the atmosphere. The greater
number remain on observation until
the clouds begin to dissipate, and it is
only then that the battalions entire
rush out in search of nectar. A bee
never goes out in a fog, because it is
well aware that dampness and cold are
two fearsome, redoubtable enemies.
We do not mean, however, that the bee
is a meteorologist in the absolute sense
of the word. Its cleverness consists in
never being taken unawares, for It pos
sesses untMing vigilance. Often one
may observe the sudden entrance of
bees into the hive when a dense cloud
hides the sun, and even though the rain
is not in evidence.
Baron Cuvier, the renowned natural
ist, then only eighteen, accepted a sit
uation as tutor in a family living near
Fecamps in Normandy. The house was
near the sea and he often strolled on
the bank. One day he found a strand
ed cuttle fish. He took it home, dissect
ed it and began then the study of mol-
luscae, in which he won such a reputa
ttion. The ocean was his text book.
This was his opportunity to learn from
that text book. By embracing the op
portunities offered in his three years'
residence by the sea he became one of
the shining lights in natural history.
The prosaic individual Who has out-
I lived romance finds it hard to under
stand how two people can dawdle away
hours and at their conclusion feel mor
ally certain that only , minutes 'have
Miss Budd "Do you approve of early
marriages?" " '
Mrs. Malaprop "Not too early. 1
should say not before high noon,".
The late Dowager-Empress Frederick
once asked Bismarck to bring her a
glass of water, and, as he handed it to
her, she said to a lady-in-waiting, who
sat near: "He has cost me as many
tears as there are drops of water in this
As a preface to bis attack upon the
recent army appointments in England,
Rudyard Kipling tells a story of a man
who was carrying a bag, and of whom
a fellow-traveler asked what It was
that the bag contained. "Mongooses,"
was tne answer; my brother sees
snakes, and I'm taking the mongooses
up to kill them." "But your brother
doesn't see real snakes." "No; but these
aren't read mongooses."
On one occasion Hans Richter was
present at a concert given by a brother
composer, at which the latter perform
ed a long and not particular interesting
work of his own. When the composi
tion came to an end Richter expressed
his criticism in a very few words.
Well," he said, "I too haf written com
positions to make a pile so high," rais
ing bis hand three feet from the
ground; "but I haf burned them!"
Once, while Daniel Webster was
speaking in the Senate on the subject
of internal improvements, the Senate
clock began to strike, but instead of
striking twice at 2 p. m., it continued
without cessation more than forty
times. All eyes were turned to the
clock, and Mr. Webster remained si
lent until it had struck about twenty.
when he thus appealed to the chair:
"Mr. President, the clock is out of or
der! I have the floor!"
In one of his conversations with Au
gustus Hare, Chief Justice Morris said
he was sitting on the bench in Ireland,
and after a case had been tried he said
to the jurymen: "Now, to consider this
matter, you will retire to your accus
tomed place," and two-thirds of them
went into the dock. Another time he
said to a culprit: "I can produce five
witnesses who saw you steal that cow."
"Yes," said the prisoner, "but I can pro
duce five hundred who did not"
It is said that one evening when Dr.
Friend was summoned from a rather
too festive board to- the bedside of a
lady patient, be felt her pulse but
could not count its beats. "Drunk, by
Jove!" he soliloquized, and pulled him
self together sufficiently to order some
harmless mixture. His delight may be
imagined when, the next morning, in
stead of an indignant dismissal from
further attendance, he received from
his patient a confession that he had di
agnosed her complain quite correctly.
The Duke of Wellington was once
much surprised by receiving a letter
which he read as follows: "Being in
the neighborhood, I venture to ask per
mission to see some of your grace's best
breeches. C. London." He answered
to the Bishop of London that he bad
great pleasure in assenting to his re
quest, though he must confess it had
given him very considerable surprise.
London House was thrown into confu
sion. The note was from London, the
great gardener, and "breeches" should
have been read "beeches."
THE MIDNIGHT SUN.
Blaze Wonll Have Been Costly Had It
Happened in the .islit.
Mr. Ransom's nephew was building
a house, but an uninitiated person, see
ing Mr. Ransom's daily supervision of
work and workmen, would have been
convinced that he himself was the
rightful owner of the new cottage.
One day, while making his daily tour
of inspection at the noon hour, he dis
covered a little bunch of shavings on
a window sill. Seizing them in his
hand, he hurried downstairs and out to
the big elm under which the carpenter
and his two assistants were eating
"See what I found on the winder
ledge!" he demanded, pointing an ac
cusing finger at the carpenter.
"Seems to be a clump of shavings,"
said the man, wonderingly, as he
munched a doughnut.
"Yes, sir, that's what 'tis," declared
Mr. Ransom, "and I'm s'prised to think
a man o' your experience should 'low
"There was a man in South Plymp
ton, where I was raised, that was
building him a house with bull's-eye
winder panes in the winders. The men
that were a-working on the house left
a bunch o' shavings no bigger'n this
one on the winder ledge, and the sun
was terrible hot, same as 'tis to-day,
and it made a focus through that win
der pane, and what happened?
"What happened?" repeated Mr. Ran
som, with increased solemnity. "Why,
the shavings ketched fire, and a blaze
started, that's what!"
"But there ain't any bull's-eyes round
here," suggested the carpenter, mildly.
"Makes no odds, one way or t'other,"
replied Mr. Ransom, severely. "What's
happened once one way may happen
next time some other way!"
"Did the house burn up?" inquired
one of the other men, with a natural
"No, it didn't," admitted Mr. Ransom,
"but that was just by good luck. 'Twas
the noon hour, and I was there, for the
man was a friend o' mine that I'd
known from boyhood, so the blaze was
put out. But s'pose it had happened In
the dead o' night The whole building
would have gone. Nothing could have
saved it. I tell ye, ye can't be too
careful "bout things o' that kind!"
PAYING OFF AN OLD SCORE.
Prairie Doss Get Even with Their Old
Enemy, the Battlesnake.
It is a familiar story that rattle
snakes are often seen-entering or leav
ing the humble tenement of the prairie
dog. The sight gave rise to the belief,
formerly held, that the reptiles and the
small owls which also frequent these
underground dwellings are on the best
of terms with the "prairie dogs, and that
all live together, a "happy family."
That belief is now known to be with
out foundation, and a cattleman, of
whom the New York Tribune tells,
once witnessed a scene which shows
tnat the rightful owner ! these prai
rie homes, although gomatlme forced
to submit to eviction or Intrusion,
know how to balance the account when
the opportunity offers.
On this particular occasion the cattle
man was riding after some steers. He
managed to get close to a colony of
prairie dogs, and stopped to watch
their quaint antics.
Considerably apart from the others,
two dogs were sitting with their nosea
close together. They appeared to be
much concerned over the movements of
a big rattler which was lazily crawling
about near them. When the snake
moved a length or two the dogs became
excited and danced like little lunatics,
but when he ceased his motion there
they were, with their noses together,
managing somehow to keep abreast of
him without seeming to follow him.
Once the snake colled, and then the
dogs had business elsewhere, but when
be straightened out they were close
beside him again.
The rattler in the course oi his wrig
glings came to a hole a$l stopped
there, as if undecided whether It would
be worth while to enter or not The
prairie dogs began to act In an unac
countable manner, as If they bad been
feeding on loco-weed and suddenly
felt its effects. They danced on one
hind foot and rolled over. They dash
ed up behind the snake as if they were
aching to push him into the hole, and
every little while they would come to
attention, with noses together talking,
The snake soon began to slip into the
hole. The dogs, although Intent upon
his movements, remained perfectly
quiet until the last of him had disap
peared. Then they got to work In earn
est, and the way they kicked dirt Into
that hole would put a railway "action
hand to shame.
They worked systematically-. When
the entrance was well filled with loose
dirt they tamped it and then threw In
more dirt, and tamped that They
were not satisfied until the entrance to
that hole was blocked and packed
down with dirt until it was as solid as
the original sod. Then the little ras
cals seemed greatly amused, and rub
bed noses times innumerable before
they danced off to join their friends
and relatives, apparently with the in
tention of telling them all about it.
An Up-Country Rising.
In spite of the old saying, the lawyer
who conducts his own ease does not al
ways have a fool for a client The Hon.
Jeremiah Mason, who was admitted to
the New Hampshire bar in 1791, was
a man of great height but during the
early part of his professional career,
says the Green Bag, was so slight and
apparently frail in build that, as the
phrase is, "he looked like a boy."
Traveling once in a sleigh after a
great snowstorm, he met a country
man in a similar conveyance. - Mr. Ma
son turned his horse and sleigh as far
to one side as he conveniently could,
and courteously requested .the other
person to do the same.
The other man, however, was sturdy
of figure and stubborn of nature, and
taking Mr. Mason's courteous speech as
a sign of a craven spirit he refused to
budge an inch, and demanded a free
way for his vehicle.
At this Mr. Mason's eyes flashed. The
day was cold and he had sunk deeply
Into the robes of his high-backed sleigh;
but now he drew himself up and sat
erect on the seat for a moment; then
he began slowly to divest himself of
his wrappings and to get upon his feet,
gradually displaying his real propor
tions to the astonished countryman,
"Say, mister, you needn't rise any
more. I'll turn out!"
The troubles of the literary man are
seldom better exemplified than hi the
case of the seedy looking poet who
wandered into an English newspaper
office, venturing to hope that the edi
tor would accept his offering.
"Give me your address," said the edi
tor. "That, sir," was the frank reply, "de
pends entirely on yourself."
"On myself?" said the astonished edi
tor. "How so?"
"Well, you see," went on the un
abashed poet "it's this way; if you
take the poem my address will remain
77 King street; if you don't take it I
shall have no address. My landlady Is
a woman of her word."
On Another Line.
A porter at a certain station on the
Caledonian Railway had been granted
leave for the purpose of going to Edin
burgh to be married. In addition, he
was given the customary return rail
During his absence a new ticket col
lector had been put on, who upon Ben
edick's return, demanded his ticket
Benedick, who had put both pass and
marriage certificate In the same pocket,
by mistake tendered the latter.
The collector opened and gravely
scanned the "lines," then returned
then with a slow headshake, and:
"Eh, eh, mon, it's a teeket for a vera
lang ride, but nae on the Caledonian
Railway." London Spare Moments.
Finding a Grave With an Egg.
The Miau-tsze, a tribe In Asia, will
not bury a man until they have first
tested the ground with an egg.
This operation is curious. While the
body is being prepared for burial, a
number of Miau-tsze, including the
male relatives of the deceased, go out
to the appointed spot bearing a large
basket of eggs.
Stooping down, one of the natives
lets an egg drop softly on the ground.
Its breaking is considered an 111 omen
and another spot is selected. In this
way the party often wander about for
hours, dropping eggs until one strikes
a place where the shell does not crack.
It -became necessary for an Elms
worth papa to chastise mildly his small
son the other evening. Some time later,
wishing to negotiate for a favor, tho
chastised one stated his wishes, and as
an inducement added:
"If you'll do this, pap, I'll excuse you
for that whipping you gave me."
Occasionally a foolish young man flat
ters a girl until she getj too Stuck up
to sneak to him.