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About Corvallis gazette. (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 13, 1901)
-A General Debility Day in and out there is that feeling of weakness that makes a burden of itself. Food does not strengthen. Sleep does not refresh. It is hard to do, hard to bear, what should be easy, vitality is on the ebb, and the whole system suffers. For this condition take Hood's Sarsaparilla It Titalizes the blood, gives vigor and tone to all the organs and functions, and is positively unequalled for all run-down or debilitated conditions. Shifted the Responsibility. Deacon Elderberry My dear Mrs. Crabtree, if only half the money spent in millinery were devoted to the church ! Mrs. Crabtree Oh, my ! But the milliners won't' reduce their prices. Hood's Hixs cut constipation. 2S cent. Told the Whole Story. Mistress (to servant about to leave) Mary, what kind of reference shall I write for you? Mary Oh, say I stayed with you for Biz months; that'll do. Inclusive. She No, I can never marry you. AH our family is opposed to you. He But you are not She I said all our family. This signature it en every box of the genuine i r rv ... Laxative Dromo-vuinine the remedy that cares m eoM tm on day Art and Nature. Miss Prude Yes; our choral society is eoine to present a comic ODera. but I won't take part. They expect me to wear tights, but I could not do that. Miss Shame, Why not? You might get them padded, you know. A Fine Memory. "Brown must have a bad memory he has owed me $10 for two years." "You are mistaken ; he has a very good memory; he always goes across he street in passing your othce. Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow's Sooth ing Syrup the best remedy to use tor u children during the teething period. Unnecstarv. " ' Teacher Now. Tommy Blinkins, if you had two apples and wanted to give Johnny Frecklcuose one, you would tell him to take, the larger one, wouldn t you? - Tommy Waw. Teacher Why not? Tommy Wouldn't have ter. He'd take it anyway. His Father Alio Drives. First Boy Your folks ain't as rich as ours. My father ana mother go driving every day. second Boy My father drives every day, too. First Boy I don't believe it. What does he drive? - - Second Boy Nails. Too Anxious, "I see they are embalming pet dogs now, he said. "Oh, isn't that lovey," she ex claimed. "That's what I'll have done to Fido. " "Just the thing," he returned, sud denly growing enthusiastic himself. "Give him to me and I'll have it done today." ODD HOTELS OF JAPAN THEYAREVERY DIFFERENT FROM THOSE OF AMERICA. Some Sarprlaea They Coattala for the Occidental Traveler Steals Served in Gueeta Kosaaa, bat Bath a ad Walking- Coavealances Are Pabllc No Great Loss, Innkeeper (after wagonload of hunt ers has departed) Silas, did you find room in their wagon for them six cases of beer and the can o' whisky? Silas Yes, got everything in er gash all hemlick! I fergot to put in their guns ! "What, ye dad-vummed oh, well ' they'll never miss 'em. The Charges. Willie Pa, teacher told us to be prepared tomorrow to tell what meter the "Charge of the Light Brigade" is in. Pa That's easy. Gas meter, of course. Forgets Where the Place U. , Small -Harry had lost his pencil, his mother told him he ; should have a place for everything and keep everything in its place. "I'do, mamma," replied the little fellow, "but sometimes I forget where the place is." ' ' ' ' . Sight Unseen. Bertha Fred Hart is' going to marry Bessie Light. Edith You don't mean it! mercy's sake, what could he seen in her? Bertha, That's what I say. you know, I suspect he must courted her over the telephone. For have Do have A Fortune to -Ke Given Away. - A noted philanthropist, lias decided to give away liis fortune to charities and no doubt much good will he accomplished. There is another agency that has also ac complished niucN good, namely. -Hosier-ter's Stomach Bitters, the medicine with fiftv rears nf cures back of it. It promotes appetite, insures digestion, cures dyspep sia, regulates me liver aim Krens me bowels regular, also prevents belching. Heartburn or flatulency. Don t tail to try it, but be sure and get the genuine. . CITO ParmanentlT Cured. Ho tits or nerronsnee rl ID - nftOTflrtfUT,iinAnfrr.KhW8GrMtNerrc Restorer. Bend for FRBE S4.00 trial ltle and treat- The Same Old Cry. V ,1I wonder what Eve said when she found she had to leave the Garden of Eden," said Mr. Grumpin's wife. - "It was just about what all women say when they are starting on a jour ney. She complained that she didn't have a thing to wear. Esctly. "What are you doing there?" cried the farm dog as he observed the hen in the coal bin. "Oh, I thought this was a good time to lay in coal, cackled the hen. Beware of Ointments for Catarrh That Contain Mercury, As mercury will surely destroy the sense of smell and completely derange the whole sys tem wnen entering it tnrougn tne mucous sur faces. Such articles should never be used ex- eept on prescriptions from reputable pnysl clans. as the damage they will do is ten fold to the good you can possibly derive from them. Hall's Catarrh Cure, manufactured by F. J. Cheney A Co., Toledo, O., contains no mercury, and is taken internally, acting directly noon the blood and mucous surfaces of the system. In buying Hall's Catarrh Cure be sure yon get the genuine. It is taken internally, and made in Toledo, Ohio, by F. J. Cheney Co. Testi monials free. Sold by Druggists, price 75c. per bottle. Hall's Family Pills are the best. They Miss No Chance.' "A woman was arrested in New York for sleeping on the grass. " I didn't suppose theAewiork police farmed out the grass privileges, too." boy, - Wholesale Troubles "Father, " said the small what is polygamy?" '-"r The old gentleman made sure that his wife was listening before ., he answered. - . - "Polygamy," he said, "is the name given to the method , of acquiring trouble by wholesale. SOU ENOW WHAT YUU ARE TAKISS When von take Grove's Tasteless Chill Tonic, irinted on every 1 1ron and Onf- cure. N cay. soc. Her Silence Explained. This is the way he wrote to her: "Molly I have not had a line from for three weeks.-Have you thrown me over?" And this is the way she answered him: .-.". "Jhon Hain't you hearn tell that I am on a sick bed, where I am slowly a-dyin', an' can't write a line to save my life, you fool your Secretary of Confederate Navy. Col. James G. Milner, who died re cently at Milford, O., was once secre tary of the navy lor the confederacy. He died very poor, yet before the war was one of the richest men in the South. Cold Comfort. Nervous Passenger Captain, what would be the result if this boat should strike an ice berg. Captain It would probably shiver its timbers. ii LADIES WANTED By an old reliable firm to do Battenberg, Embroid ery and all kinds of Fancy Work for us at home. Sieady work and good pay. steady or leisure hoars.' 'or Information send stamp to Parisian Needle work Co., 85 Dearborn St., Chicago. 111. Culinary. are only two "There cooks." "For instance?" "Those that can't cook cook and those that can won't.' - kinds - of and will cook and Ungrateful. "They say the Missouri razor. is an ungrateful scamp. " - "How so?" "He cuts his best friends. " tug Sick Headache Quickly Cared; Indigestion, bad stomach, constipation, sick headache. That's the program. Next program cascarets uanay uatnanic, instant reuet. Druggists, 10c, 2uc, 60c. - . A Boy as a Fencer. A national fencing competition has just taken place at Bologna, and the championship was won by Signor Ataillio Mod f err t to. This 'maitre d'armes is only 12 years old. He fought the most celebrated Italian fencers and beat them all. The native Inns of Japan offer sur prises to the Occidental traveler. The inn building is of Japanese architec ture, of two stories, and generally rambling, for a house which has been at all prosperous will have had addi tions made from time to time to ac commodate the Increased patronage. The front door is In the day time mere ly a. panel with paper windows, which is pushed aside to admit guests. Mine host stands smiling In the aperture, and If It Is winter a large brazier- Is placed In the midst of the first apart ment, which would correspond to the office or exchange of one of our hotels. The brazier contains small sticks of charcoal, and gives forth little heat. Several newly arrived Japanese trav elers will generally be sitting about it on cushions on the floor, chatting and rubbing their hands over the tiny blaze. Before entering you must sit down on the step and take your shoes off, no matter bow cold the weather, for the tatami" (mats) of a Japanese Inn and the polished floor are kept as imma culately clean as a private house. When the shoes are off and delivered to an attendant, a little "amah," or maid, leads you through the room on which the front door opens, along passages and by. several twists and turns, and along corridors, possibly up a flight of stairs, to the room which Is assigned to you. It Is entirely empty of any furniture. At one side is a tiny dais. or wooden platfor.ni, on which may be a carved stand, perhaps of teak wood, and on it a vase with some plum blos soms or green boughs, arranged ac cording to the Japanese conventional style of flower arrangement The only other ornamentation in the room will consist of a "kakemono" or two, with pictures or writing on them. These are the hanging scrolls that take the place In Japan that our framed pic tures do with us. The walls- of the room are finished In a soft green or brown, and the wood work is left the natural color. - First of all the "amah" brings out some flat cushions for the guests to sit on; then she ' brings a "hlbachi" from down stairs, and puts In it lighted coals and some fresh sticks of charcoal.- The next thing is tea, and this Is daintily served In little cups on bronze stands, and with it some delicious cakes of bean paste, or else wafers which fair ly melt In your mouth. Now, If you have arrived 4ate, comes the question of supper. The meals in ' these Inns are always served In your apartment. There is no such thing as a general dining-room, in this or in a private house. ' J ' . - - -i-' - .-- : There will be another long pause. during which the room may be slightly warmed by the heat from the brazier. but when supper is brought and the screen is thrust aside by the little maid. the cold comes rushing in again. The Japanese pay no. attention to cold air and draughts, even In the dead of win ter. The, maid kneels in the doorway when she opens the screen, for It would not be considered etiquette for any one to enter a room standing. ' The meal Is placed on a tiny wooden stand, often beautifully lacquered, one stand ." for each person, and all the courses are placed on it together in beautiful little dishes. Nothing is ever served with more exquisite taste In the most luxu rious American hotel than in the poor est Japanese hostelry. Just as the most poverty-stricken Japanese often live In more aesthetic surroundings than many of our rich people. - - When it becomes dark the room Is lit by a square paper lantern on a high wooden stand. By the light the Japa nese read and sew in the evenings. though they , are gradually importing and using many of our kerosene lamps, which give a better light At bedtime the "amah" goes to a sort of clothes ress or chest of drawers set In the side of the wall, and produces the bed, which is simply a series of soft quilts called "futons," and which are laid on the floor, one on top of the other. Down coverings are placed over these, and in between the sleeper crawls. Sheets and pillows such as we use must be brought by the guest who requires them. While the guests at a Japanese Inn eat In the seclusion of their rooms, the bath and washing arrangements are public, -and here: one may encounter any of the other guests of the house of either sex while performing one's ablu tions. To say the least this is . ex tremely awkward, but It. Is according to Japanese custom, and the same thing is found in the private Japanese houses. atantly on the horse's back and fasten there. This seemed to solve the ques tion, but there remained one more step, and this was the training of the quick horse. Not only must the engine and the harness and the men and the horses be ready, but the horses must be in the harness at once the operation must be as nearly Instantaneous as human In genuity and brute Intelligence together could contrive. In every fire-engine bouse In the United States to-day, therefore, we may see and admire the "quick" horse, sleek-limbed, clear-eyed, with an alert, intelligent air, standing not far from the machine of which he Is the moving power. ' The casual visitor saunters In. He thinks the life of a fireman Is a quiet and easy one. Judging from the appear ance of the quarters. All is serene. The machines are Immaculate in polished brass and red paint . Some of the men are reading, others are playing a game of checkers. Suddenly there Is a tinkling some where, and the stroke of a gong. A snap, a click and through the wide open doors the various machines fly. one after another, until the visitor views In astonishment an empty house. It is like magic a wonderful "transfor mation-scene." He gazes up and down the street; but the galloping procession has vanished as if It were a dream. The quick horse has done his duty. and once more exhibited the power of. organization and training. - Within the time required by the firemen of the old en time to throw open the engine-house doors, the complicated machines of to day are throwing water on the flames. and the brave firemen, having scaled the building with the agility of acro bats are dealing well-considered blows against the fire foe. In almost every city there is a prac tice-drill at least once a day In the engine-houses, and the visitor may have an opportunity of Inspecting the admirable development of the Amer ican fire system and the fine horses so splendidly trained. And he may also have an opportunity at the same time of lamenting that other branches of .our public service are not conducted with equal efficiency. What eg Ovaritis? - A dull, throbbing pain, accompanied try a sense of tenderness and heat low down in the side, with sua occasional shooting pain, indicates inflammation. On examination it will be found that the region of pain shows some swell ing. This la the first stage of ovaritis, inflammation of the ovary. If the roof of your house leaks, my sister, yon have it fixed at once ; why not pay the same respect tb your own body ? You need not, you ought not to let yourself go, when one of your own, sex Mas. Am. Astost. bolda out the helping hand to you, and wiu aavise you without money ana without price. Mrs. Pinkham's labora tory is at Lynn, Mass. Write a letter there telling all your symptoms and get the benefit of the greatest experi ence in treating female ills. " l was Buffering to such an extent from ovarian trouble that my physi cian thought an operation would be 1 necessary. "iiyaia Hi. finkbams vegetable uom pound having been recommended to ms, I decided to try it. After using several bottles I found that I was cured. My entire system was toned up, and I suffered no more with my ovaries." Mas. AmrA Asros.Troy. Mo. INDIAN WORDS AND NAMES. and OLD PEOPLE I' fr . i (1 ys. . I GETTING TO A FIRE. The American Fire Ie part men ta' Splen did Horses and Tnelr Trainiac F. S. Dellenbaugh writes an article for St Nicholas on "The Quick Horse," devoted to the training of horses for the American fire departments. Mr. Dellenbaugh says: When a fire breaks out in America, It Is necessary to reach It at once. The telegraph was brought into service in sending the alarm. . In Munich some years ago the method in vogue was to hang out a red flag by day and a red lantern by night from the top of one of the Frauenkirehe towers, on -4 n.A Nimllnii i. rha n nf mnt nf the ilia that come with old ae-e. ': With advancing years there is a decline of strength and vigor the machinery of the body moves with less speed and accuracy. Because of the weak and irregular f !, iiwrf th lnrul mnm mors alowlv. becomes impure and loses much of it. Wfgv: muscles, tissue, and nerves literally starve for on 0'" ' mW rou lack of nourishment Auggh and polluted circulation is followed b7 a long the Blde m ot Are; hut train of bodily ailments. Cold feet, cniuy sensations up ana aowu tie spine, poor appetite and digestion, soreness of the muscles, rheumatic pains, hard and fissured kin, face sores, chronic running ulcers on the lower limbs and other parts of the body --these and many other diseases peculiar to old people are due to a lack of lixiltliv hlnnd snri itnnerfect circulation. Restoration to health must come through the building up and purification of the blood, thus adding strength and tone to the vital organ, and quick, healthy action to the circulation. . - S. S. S. being strictly a vegetable blood remedy and the best tonic, makes it the most valuable and efficacious of all medicine for old people. It is free from all mineral inmdienta. and mild and pleasant in its action It cures blood diseases of every character, even xnose innexriea or contracted ui cariy me. oju Sets under the influence of S. S. S. there is a marked improvement in the general ealth, and as richer and purer blood begins to circulate through the body the appetite improves, and there is a softness and elasticity about the skin that you have not noticed for years ; sores begin to heal, pains in muscles and joints grad ually cease, and you find that it is possible to be happy and healthy even in old age. Our medical department is in charge of physicians who make a study of blood and skin diseases. If yon would like to have their opinion and advice in your case, write them all about it and you shall receive such information and advice as you want This will cost you nothing. Other, have found our medical depart ment of great benefit to them their cure being much more rapid as the result of some special direction, received from our physicians. . Don't be your own doctor when you can get medical advice free. Book M Blood and Skin Disease, mailed to all who desire it. - . etoou . TUB SWIFT SPECIFIC COMPANY, ATLANTA. OA In. America such a system would have resulted in the destruction of the whole town. The telegraph is the only thing for us. But it is not enough to know immedi ately the exact location of a fire; it is also necessary to reach it Immediately, The steam fire-engine was a splendid machine, . with steam always up and everything In readiness for Instant de parture, but how to secure this instant departure was a question; Horses were kept standing in their stalls With the harness oh, but this was not quick enough. Each second's delay meant loss of life or possible millions of prop erty destroyed. So the first swinging harness was Invented: a harness con trived in such a way that, while al ways attached to the engine or other apparatus. It could be made to drop In- J long and prosper.' " Cbana-ea la BpeUiaar that Have Marred Their Meaning. Commenting on the changes which have been made In the orthography of Indian names and the expressed be lief that historians and literary people have surrendered their right and duty to maintain these verbal relics In their purity, the Montgomery (Ala.) Adver tiser says: The statement is true, more's the pity. As the Indians have no written language, their local names were acquired by the whites by sound only, and often by illiterate whites who had little knowledge of the arts of spelling and writing. For this rea son there is little uniformity in the orthography of Indian proper names. Even the work of intelligent scholars is open to the same objections.- The vocabularies of Indian words In Ala bama prepared by Schoolcraft, Galla tin, Compere, Wright, Adair, Bartram and others all differ in spelling, and often in pronunciation, so much so that sometimes It Is difficult to recog nize a name when It goes through so many changes. The various Indian dialects were the inost expressive of any in the world. Every name was significant, whether It was of an animate or inanimate ob ject, and the name given plainly lndi cated its meaning. Unfortunately the sound as well as the orthography and expression of many of our Indian names have been sacrificed in .the ef fort to simplify the words and to make them conform to our system of spell ing and writing the English language. The general government, too, or the Postoffice Department, has sacrificed much of the euphony and meaning of our Indian names in order to bring about simplicity and uniformity. It has accomplished this end, but , has done it at the expense of meaning. Many names of postofflces in Alabama have no significance as now spelled. but as they were originally written any one familiar with Indian words would know Just what was meant to be ex pressed. However, we must admit that Indian words have not undergone - more changes or modifications than . .have many of the ' words taken from the European or other old world languages and dialects. The people of the Unit ed States and the government itself are formulating something like a language of our -own, and if the change carries with it a total hiding of the original significance of many words, it must be accepted as one of the results of the march of progress. But we must be permitted to express regret that so many of our native names have been improved entirely away from their originals. , - Jefferson at Seventy-two. "In Florida, where Ponce de Leon failed to discover the Fountain of Per petual Youth, Joseph Jefferson seems to have found It," declares James S. Metcalfe, in the Ladles' Home Journal. He Is a picturesque figure. - His ruddy cheeks and bright eyes give the lie to his 72 years. He is slender, but not with the leanness of age. His hair, mostly black, streaked only here and there with gray, and in length showing a wholesome contempt for the fine art of the barber, blows about in the breeze, r His. Angers are as quick and deft at knotting a line or adjusting a sinker as those of a boy on the banks of a stream, and he enters Into every detail with boyish - enjoyment. His fishing' he alternates with landscape painting, writing and the care of plants. In none of these pursuits does he claim professional skill, but he brings to them something more than professional zest Mr. Jefferson is a very abstemi ous man. In eating, as in other things except occupation in the open air he evidently "believes in moderation as a means to well living and long living. He dS not join in our after-luncheon smoke, stating that if he had not given up tobacco a good many years ago he felt sure that he would not.be with us now. - Whatever the secret of his long and useful life. It is safe to say that every one of his countless friends and admirers would be glad to lengthen itJ by a fulfillment of his own Rip's fa vorite benediction: 'Here's his health 1 ana ms iamny s, auu may tuey uvv FARM MACHINERY AND SUPPLIES. Beat DOttttble to build Best material. Best pro- I portion. Best fin tat.. Lightest running. Seventy I Sears' experience. Mil UHKi.t., Liwn s . 0. M . rim TAVBKCik, let and Taylor Sta., Portland, Or. 175 Front St., COr. Oak, Portland, Ur. lis Ensilage Cutter. ' Best and only perfect blower cut ler on the market. Send for circular. Mitchell, Lewis A StaverCo. Portland, Ore. Where do You Sell Your Hides? rerjlf We always pay the Highest Price. Chas. L. Mastlck & Co. afaf I n il IfrV M AIT 99 Tne Perfection or Wall Plaster, will not fsll orr, even MUJA mWtMAWm M though a leakage occur by the burstingof water pipes. m m mm mm arwaT M afV'afa, Sena ns your address and receive circular aLjfaaff fA-JJp M "howinS what others have gained by the use of THE ADAMANT CO., Foot of 14th Street, Portland. Ormgon. Agents wanted In every town. GEISLER PATENTS COMPANY. Chamber of Commerce, PORTLAND, OREGON. Secures patents for inventions In the United Stales n l foreign countries. Also negotiates mar kets and defends pateut inven tions. No better terms or facilities than we offer obtainable any where. Payment of our fees may be deferred till patent is allowed. Write for pamphlet. French Banks Cieculate Cold, The Bank of France compels cus tomers checking out money to accept at least one-tilth in gold coin. TO CUBE A COLD IK ONE DAY Take Laxative Bromo Ouintne Tablets. All Irnegists refund the money if it fails to cure. B. W. drove's signature is on each box. 25c. His Choice. Kind Old Man (to tramp) Now, why don't you learn a trade? Tramp Well, I would, sir, if I knew of one better than this. JOHN POOLE, Portland, Oregon, Foot of Morrison Street, Can. give yon the best bargains in Buggies, Plows, Boilers and Engines, Windmills and Pnmps an! General Machinery. See us before buying. IF! &L,5i"i.,MNTA8THF05 PENSION BICKFORO. Washington, D. C. trier will re ceive quick reolies. B. 6th N. H. Vol. Staff 20th Corps. Prosecuting claims since 1S7K. - Reasuring. Old Gentleman (to railway porter Porter, the rain is dripping in from the lamp hole all over my clothes. Porter (reassuringly) .No, sir; it s quite watertight, I assure you. That's only the oil leaking. " . Connecticut and Clocks. The first clocks manufactured in this country were by Eli Terry at Ply- month, Conn., in 179d. ' The manu facture soon became extensive, and Connecticut wooden clocks were fam ous all over the country. The Bast Prescription for Malaria Chills and Fever is a bottle of Grove's Tasteless Chill Tpnic. It is simply iron and qninine in Cure, No Pay. Price 60c. a tasteless form. No And Now Look at Him. "See that magnate over there?" "Yes. What of him " "Well, 20 years ago that man ar rived in New York with only a million dollars m his pockets. '-.-, ; A Chilly Petition. . "Deacon Sniff seems to have a -very cold temperament. " ' Yes; he prayed tor ram once and it hailed. Hoitt's School. At Menlo Park, San Mateo County, Cal., with its beautiful, surroundings, perfect climate, careful supervision, thorough instruction, complete laboratories, and gymnasium, easily maintains its position iu the front ranks, of tchools for dots on the Pacific Coast. Ira G. Boitt, Ph. I., Principal. I CARTER'S OlTTlE;: I Snuffed Out Friend What became of your poem called "Light, Beautiful Light?" Poet Xsadly) The editor turnejl it down. - A Rebuke. "You don't expect to be famous?" said the pugilist. "I had entertained ambitiions in that direction, " said the young au thor. : - "But you don't do anything but write." "It is my writing that I depend on. "Nonsense! The idea of a man ex pecting to get famous by sitting down and wiggling nis lingers over a piece ot paper all day I it s absurd! ' ABSOLUTE SECURITY. Genuine Carter's Little Liver Pills. Must Bear Signature of Sea Fac-Simlle Wrapper Below. Very snail amd as easy to take assagszw FOR HEADACHE FOR DIZZINESS FDR BILIOUSNESS FOR TORPID LIVER. FOR CONSTIPATION. FOR SALLOW SKIN. FOR m COMPLEXION a VaatsnUaUAB sWUVT WW IWMTWna, ts crts I Sowar Tesetaue.; lauuusuu CURE SICK HEADACHE S.tnmer Resolutions ifeetey Cure TAKE TUB Sure relief fi om liquor, opium and tobacco eena ior particulars to habits. Keeley Institute, Moved to 420 Williams Ave., Eaat Side. SUMMER W. H. SMITH S CO., Buffalo, N. Y. is best time to cure Catarrh, Bronchitis and Consumption. Our remedy is guaranteed, SI. r. U. BOX 73. The Proptr Place. Landowner (to trespasser) Don't you see that sign: "No Fishing in these grounds?" Trescpasser I ain't fishing 'in the ground. I'm fishing in the water. to is the the Making Up the Pack. "Somebody calls attention fact that every new war ship queen of the navy." "I rather think that the transport that turned over the other day is the joker.' SCHOOLS AND COLLEGES. BISHOP SCOTT ACADEMY. - Portland. Oregon. Thirty-second year. 'A boarding and day school. Military and Manual Training. Opens Sept. 12, 1901, with a faculty of 12 competent teachers, who employ modern methods and understand boys. Illustrated catalogue. - ARTHUR C. MEWIUL, Principmt. - 300 Positions Seeurefl Yearly, San Francisco Business College laao itiarKet et.. Man e raocisco, ti. FULL COURSE, $60.00. - Write for Catalogue. . M. P. K. U. Mm. 3 taou 117 H EN writing; to advertisers please mention this paper. Piso's Cure cannot be too hiphlr spoken of as a cough cure. J. V. O'Brien. 322 Tliird Ave., N., Minneapolis, Minn., Jan. 6,1900. The Secret Ballot First Tramp Blest if I like dis here secret ballot. A man shouldn't be ashamed to let it be known what he votes for. Second Tramp No, de only t'ing dat ought to be kept secret is de price ne gets ior his vote. SfopmthoCouBhamf Work. Off iita Gold. laxative Promo-Quinine Tablets cure a cold in one day. .No cure, No Pay. Price 25 cents. - A Superior Baby. Proud Father Jenkins told me to day that their baby coos so loud that you can hear it all over the house. Proud Mother I hope, Harry, that you didn't forget to tell him that ours cries so loud that it can be heard all over the block; if he doesn't believe it he can ask the neighbors. r-ffUklHrtfi iiuniiunuiiii AVeeetable Prepacationfor As similating rheFoodandBegula iing theStomacte artlBowels of Promotes Digestion.Cheerfur ness and Rest .Contains neither Opium,Morptune nor Mineral. NotNahcotic RmMU Sml.- FrWItt St0& " fmSud.tofgr A'periecl Remedy for Cons tip. Ron, Sour StouvrJ,DkaTtioe(i Worms .Convulsions Jeverish ness and Loss of Slbbr Facsimile Signature of EXACT COPV OF WRAPPER. For Infants and Children. The Kind You Have Always Bought Bears- Signature ST FORTH BOWELS If yon haren't a regular, healthy morement of th4 bowels erery day, you're sick, or will be. Keep youf bowels open, and be well. Force, in tbe abape ol violent physic or pill poison, is dangerous. Th rnuuuiaeab, easiest, uiusv penec wm ui a 0ewBUiear turn vietvu is w tug ' keeping Uw y4p$X CANDY I! CATHARTIC J. TKADI UAKK tOtSTOKO .Pleasant, Palatable. Potent. Taste Good. Do Good, Merer Sicken, Weaken, or (Jripe. 10c, SOe Write for free sample, and booklet on nealtb. Address Storlh Rfaw4 Coapaar, Caieaia, mal, l.w Int. SSXa KEEP YOUR BLOOD GLEAN SAP In Use For Over Thirty'Years I (a) tmc cKsmum ca.Miir. near voaa hit. Of Course. "What did the lawyer say when you explained your case to him?" asked Mrs. Baxter. "He said it was fees-ible," replied Mr. Baxter. Hazarding an Answer. . A poet in the New York Press be gins some pathetic verses in this ques tioning style: "Whv should I weeD at the barri cade? Why should I weep at the bar?" Hat Other Names. Church Did you know that Styles has a name for his automobile? Gotham No; what is it? "Why, he calls it Madcap Violet." "Well, that isn't what he called it when it broke down ten miles from any habitation.". . , . The Financier. :Gaul Say, lend me $10, will you? I'll give it back to you today. I want it to decide a bet. . Klose All right. Here you are. What waa the bet? ' Gaul Smithers bet me $10 that I could not borrow $10 from you. TF Cough Syrup. Tastes Good. In time, gold br druralsta. WIS. 3I3