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About Corvallis gazette. (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909 | View Entire Issue (June 21, 1901)
Away, away, to the brookside green,
In the morning's earliest flash,
To the purling brook where the aiders
Gracefully o'er the water's rush.
And the golden sun, with its many-hued
Makes the tinted wavelets blush.
The lancewood rod, with its supple tip.
Is sound and strong as a pine;
But, arching, it bends with a dainty dip
When the brook trout strains the line,
And the spray flies high when the fish's
Is pierced by the hook's sharp tine. '
The tackle's strong and the water's right.
So there's chance for luck to-day;
With the wind in the south and the sun
Our creels will surely weigh.
Ere with weary feet, by the gloaming's
Homeward, we wend our way.
And where the mossy bank is sprayed
By the water's roaring fall,
'Neath the slender birches' flickering
We'll rest and thankful, recall
That, of sports die Fates for men hare
Angling's the best of all.
t H rl 1 t-H-1-M t
A WORKING GIRL i
4 H V M-l' I I H' I I1H
Cr3 HE sentiments yon have been
expressing, my dear Boy," ob
served Albert Lestrange with
the patronizing manner justified by his
.seven years' seniority, "would be ex
cellent In a novel, or might even be suit
able for a city clerk, but they are quite
Inapplicable to us."
"Why bo?" inquired the younger
"Because rank and wealth have du
ties as well as privileges," replied Al
bert. "And foremost among them la
that of making a suitable matrimonial
alliance, and not "
"That's all bosh, Bertie !" Interrupted
Roy. "A suitable matrimonial alliance!
Poof! the sound of it makes one feel
"You are young, my dear Roy," said
his brother, pityingly. "Walt until you
are my age and you will look differ
ently at things." ; ' -
- "I shaH never agree with you on that
point, that's certain," answered the
-.younger man, "for it's my opinion and
always will be that a man who marries
. a woman that he doesn't love ought to
be kicked." .
"There Is displayed the rashness of
youth," remarked Albert, sententlously.
"And believe me, my dear Roy " -
' What he was about to add will never
be known now, for at that moment a
loud cry for help was heard from a
meadow on the other side of the hedge
that skirted the line down which the
brothers were walking.
"Come along, B(rtle," cried Roy,
"there's a stile a few yards higher up.
In two minutes the young men had
Jumped the rails and were on the scene
of action,- where a couple of tramps
were standing on either side of a well
dressed young lady.
"You take the little one, Roy," ex
claimed Albert, "I'll tackle the other."
The taller tramp lifted the stick he
was carrying, but before be could use
It Albert's fist caught him under the
chin, and he. found himself Bitting In
the hedge, while a moment later Roy
knocked bis companion into a bed of
nettles close by.
"How can I thank you J" observed the
rirl, whom the young men now had time
to notice was uncommonly pretty.
had no Idea that tramps were so dan
gerous." ' -
"Pray don't mention It," replied Al
bert as he wiped his knuckles, "It was
"It was a great deal to me I can as
sure you," said the girl with a merry,
rippling laugh, "for unfortunately I was
carrying all my worldly wealth with
me." . , , .
"Are. you returning to TormouthT"
Inquired Albert, without noticing the
latter part of her speech, r "Can we
have the pleasure" of seeing you home?"
"I shall be grateful indeed If you will
accompany me as far as the Anchor
Hotel," was the reply, and then as they
walked across the fields she 'further
explained that she had been ordered
down to the little seaside town by her
doctor for the. recovery of her health;
"not that there's much the matter with
me, only overwork, you know."
During the three-mile walk Albert be
came more and more reticent, while
Roy, who at first had been quite over
come by the unexpected vision of beau
ty, gradually thawed out under the In
fluence of her smiles until when they
parted outside the hotel he had made
an appointment for the following morn
ing to show her the famous Smuggler's
For a few minutes Albert was silent,
and then he observed gravely, "If yu
take my advice, Roy, you will not see
that young person again. I do not con
sider that she Is a desirable acquaint
"Why not 7" asked Roy, astonished.
"She is evidently a lady."
"That -she has been well educated I
will not deny," answered Albert, "but
she works for her living, Boy. Did you
not hear her say that she was over
- worked, and that she carried all her
worldly wealth In her pocket?'
"She Is a charming girl," retorted
Roy, "and 1 am going to see her to
.' morrow In spite of you or any. other old
This reply hurt Albert's feelings and
caused a coolness between the brothers,
but Roy kept his word, and every day
.- for three weeks he accompanied Miss
' Lefroy to one or other of the many
. natural beauties of the neighborhood.
. - At length came the fatal day of her
' departure, and after seeing her off Roy
returned home more depressed than his
brother had ever seen him. . ;
"So your fair friend has gone away
at last," said Albert at dinner time.
"Thank heaven that she did not en
- tangle you In a 'matrimonial alliance.' "
"It wasn't her fault, I can assure
you," replied Roy. , "She wouldn't have
"You actually proposed to her?"
"Yes, I did, and she has put me off
for a 'month, as she says she does not
believe I know my own mind, but I've
The customs authorities have prohibited the ntry it typewriters into Turkey,
and 200 machines in the custom house tare been ordered returned to the con
signor. The authorities have taken up the peculiarly characteristic attitude that
there is no distinct' feature About typewriting by which the authorship could be
recognized or a person using a machine be traced, and that, consequently, anyone
is able to put in type seditious writings without fear of compromising himself.
Hektographic paste and fluid also are prohibited for similar reasons. The em-"
bassies are. making representations on the subject with the view of inducing the
Turkish government to take up a more reasonable attitude.
got her address Jn London and permis
sion to call on her the first week In
The hours dragged themselves away.
and on the first day of pheasant shoot
ing, in spite of his brother's remon
strances, Roy left home for the great
Two days later Albert followed him
to town. It was but a forlorn hope, but
It occurred to him that he might pur-
suade the girl for a consideration of
course to be merciful and release his
brother from any foolish promises he
may have made.
As Albert did not know much about
London, he determined to seek the as
sistance and advice of his uncle. Lord
Torchester, but on his arrival at Tor
chester House he found that a garden
party was in full swing.
Lady Torchester greeted him with a
few kind words of welcome and he
passed on to his uncle. .
"Hello!" exclaimed the latter, "what
has brought you up to town?" : :
"Why, to tell you the truth, Roy has
been Inveigled by some typewriting
girl, and I've come up to see if I can get
him out of the mess, and as I thought
you would be able to help me, I "
"Certainly, certainly," Interrupted his
uncle; "but here comes Miss Uarrlck,
the famous actress;' shall I introduce
your a- ,.- : - .
"Nothing I should like better, I have
read so much of her that What! Miss
Lefroy!"....-, .V-::- ':
"The same, Mr. Lestrange," answered
the smiling girl. "And perhaps you will
permit me to present my future-husband,
Mr. Roy Lestrange! By the way,
will you be best man?" Ally Sloper.
HAD BAD LUCK WITH TEETH.
Mla'ortnnesofu Woman Who Required
the Service of a Dentist.
A dentist ; enjoying : ah extensive
practice among the fashionable- people
of the South Side relates this peculiar
experience of one of his patrons: "She
was a rather pretty young married
woman," he says, "but her upper front
teeth were so badly discolored and de
fective as to greatly mar her appear
ance. Her husband after much- per
suasion Induced her to have two of the
wont replaced with artificial teeth. I
made such a neat job of It that she was
delighted. The two teeth were on a
plate, and she wore them to bed the
first night she had them. During the-)
night they fell from her mouth to the
floor, and when she got up In - the
morning she trod on them and broke
the. plate all to pieces.- I reset the
teeth on another plate and she went
home again with them. That night
she put them In a glass of water on the
mantel. Her husband got up In the
AMERICAN HALL OF
The American Hall of Fame was dedicated in New York recently in the pres
ence of a distinguished assemblage of representative citizens from many parts of
we country. . .
, he idea of the Hall of rame was conceived by Chancellor MacCracken, to
. whom it was suggested by the need of a
of the university quadrangle. This space the chancellor proposed to devote to
an institution similar to Westminster Abbey, the Pantheon in Paris - and the
"Bunnies' Halle," Munich. Twenty-nine tablets were decided upon by a plan of
selection, designed with every regard to fairness, by a jury of eminent Americans.
This number of names will be added to every five years throughout the twentieth
century, when nve new tablets will be unveiled in the Hall provided the electors,
under the rules, can agree on so many.' The dimensions of the building are as
follows: Total exterior length -of the colonade, 604 feet; height, 20 feet; breadth.
IS feet; length of museum, exclusive of
feet; height, 18 feet. -
night to get a drink of water, and find
ing something In the tumbler threw the
contents out of the front window, thus
disposing of the second set in three
days. Then I made her a third set.
These she put on the mantel when she
retired and forgot to" replace them in
the morning. The maid while dusting
the room swept these off into the grate
underneath the mantel, .where they
burned up. The family moved out of
town a few days afterward, so whether
she got a fourth set of teeth I do not
know." Chicago Chronicle. . -
Youngest and Oldest of Kings.
Europe has a new little King who
has a double flaim to distinction. He
is the youngest of ruling kings, and at
the same time the
lineal : representa
tive of the oldest
reigning family in
Europe. His name
and title Is Grand
Duke Franz IV. of
Schwerin, and he
ascended - to - the
throne on which
his fathers have
sat for twenty-five
The young king is
than a month ago.
19 years old, and It is his cousin who
Is prince consort of Holland. His king
dom is one of the petty German States,
and comprises only 5,000 square miles
of territory, with a totaj population of
60,000. The total revenue of the king
dom is barely ?10;000,000 a year, but
It has a "man-sized" national debt of
nearly 830,000,000. Franz IV. was the
second king of the new century to as
cend the throne, the first being Edward
of England. He is a near relative of
the Czar of Russia, and haB connec
tions with almost every royal family
of Europe. -
Where Were They? :i
Mrs. Jones I am sorry I could not
come along with Henry to your house
last night What! Wasn't my husband
at your house all last evening?
And these few words led to a revehv
tlon which Jones and Brown will have
trouble to explain. Ohio State-Journal.
, clean Sydney."
In Sydney the streets are thoroughly
cleaned every night, and any one
throwing refuse or waste material of
any sort on the street Is arrested and
fined. - All the kitchens In the larger
residences are on the top floor, and all
the clothes are dried on the roof.
It Is called "cup of sorrow,", but It Is
the experience of most people that It Is
measured In a tub.
FAME IN NEW YORK.
building which would ronnd out the beaut
entrance corridors, 200 feet; breadth, 40
SHARED HIS LEAP TO DEATH.
White Elk Forced to Obey lodgment
.: of the Shoshons Indiana.
White Elk, the son of Standing Bear,
:he Shoshone chieftain, sat stolidly .In
the grim circle of Indians that sat
around the -council fire. He sat un
moved as each Indian in turn thrust
bis hand forward with the fingers out
spread and the thumb pointing down
ward, r The last Indian in the circle
bad made the sign. . Standing Bear
arose and stood stiff and stern In the
red lights of the burning embers. Every
eye was upon him. White Elk sat
looking stolidly at him through half
:losed eyelids. Standing Bear thrust
his arm out at full length and slowly
spread his fingers apart and turned his
thumb toward the earth.. - A scream
came from a group of women standing
near the chiefs lodge. Then two old
squaws led away a young Indian
woman who still sobbed in spite of the
storied stoicism of her race. The sen
tence of death had been passed on
White Elk. He slowly rose as his fa
ther turned toward him and extended
piece of black wampum. He took It
and tucked It In his girdle, bowed slow
ly to. the council, and strode away to
his own tepee, where he sat calmly
puffing at his pipe long after the coum
11 had broken up and its members bad
gone quietly to their lodges, wnite
Elk sat alone in the silence of the night
listening to the rushing waters of the
Fopoagle. It was the voice of his exe
cutioner. Three days more and he was
to be cast from a high rock Into the
Place of Punishment," the deep hole
In the mountains which swallowed tip
the rushing Popoagie and carried it
somewhere deep down into the bowels
of the earth. r.i:
Into this place White Elk was to be
thrown because the Shoshones believed
that the person who disappeared Into
the depths along with the roaring wa
ters of the Popoagie died a death more
dreadful than any other that could be
meted out to him. . Because the Popo
agie drew its victims so deeply down
into the dark regions under the' earth
that the soul could never escape and
find its way to the . happy hunting
ground of the tribe. White Elk was not
afraid to die. He had met death face
to face a -dozen 'times, 1 and had not
trembled:S He had fought " with the:
Blackf eet. and the Sioux, and led his
warriors to -victory on many a hard
fought field He had fought hand to
hand with. the murderous Apaches,
and never knew what it was to be
afraid, i But in spite, of his seeming
indifference -he shivered as he heard
the hoarse roar. of the Popoagie tum
bling riotously over the rocks and leap
ing down the precipice to disappear In
the dark depths below. He- pictured
his soul fighting with the angry water
to regain the upper air that It might
ascend to the happy hunting ground in
the clouds. But he knew the Popoagie
would triumph. He was certain that
no soul could defeat the malevolent
spirit of the Popoagie. White Elk
could regard death with equanimity,
but he could not bear the thought of
an eternity spent : Tjattling with the
spirit of the waters while Laughing
Eyes waited for him in vain -In the
happy hunting ground. 'V -
White Elk's head dropped forward
and he groaned. He heard a sound be
hind him and sprang to his feet
Laughing Eyes stood beside him in the
moonlight She motioned him with her
hand and he followed her out. to the
cliff overlooking the deep crevice, down
which the Popoagie lost Itself. On the
cliff the two sat in : the moonlight
"Ton must not - give yourself to the
spirit of the Popoagie," said the girl.
"You can go away. I will go with
you. - xne uiacKieet nave ueen your
enemies, but they- love- you, for you
are a mighty warrior. ; To them you
can go and they will make you a chief,
and I will go with you." White Elk
sat silent Then he spoke: "I must
die because I did not put to death
Nazalla, the Blackf oot chief. ; I had my
spear at his throat I might have kill
ed him. But year$. ago Nazalla spared
my life when as a boy I was hunting
alone in the forest He gave me food
ana water ana snoweq me tne way
back to my own people. I could not
kill him as he lay wounded. - But the
Shoshones fear Nazalla. They think
that with him dead the Blackf eet
would never more triumph In battle.
I would rather die and disappear into
the under darkness forever." The girl
fell on her knees and entreated him.
White Elk softly stroked her hair. But
-he only shook his head in reply to her
entreaties, j Long the two sat there
Then' they arose and walked back to
the village, and White Elk left Laugh
ing Eyes at the door of her father's
lodge. Three days passed away, and
the next morning just before sunrise
all the Shoshones were gathered In
view of the great rock that lifted itself
above the deep sink hole of the Popo
agie.5 -The medicine men of the tribe
swaying their bodies chanted a death
hymn. ; '
As the first rays of the Bun shone
down the valley and rested redly upon
the little group on the rock White Elk
stepped forward with a strong young
Indian on either side. ' He turned and
looked keenly : -back at the group of
women who stood about Laughing
Eyes. He gave a sign and the two
young Indians rested their hands on
his shoulder. White Elk stood with
his face lifted up for a moment to the
clouds. He cast his eyes around and
took a last look at the woods and at
his people standing grim and silent In
the clefts of the rocks. Then he sprang
forward and shot straight downward
from the top of the cliff. .His body
turned half over in the air. ' Then If
struck with a splash In the roaring
water and was drawn downward and
disappeared forever In the cavernous
depths of the "place of punishment"
The Indians stood looking downward
where the form of the young chief had
disappeared. Then there was a cry
and all looked again toward the top of
the rock just as they saw Laughing
Eyes, hurl herself headlong downward
toward the rushing water. She sank
from sight and her body, too, was
drawn downward to the depths. White
Elk's soul would not have to escape
the spirit of Popoagie to meet that of
Laughing Eyes. "
HAS VOLCANOES TO BURN. 1
Cncle 8am Has Choice Assortment
in the Philippine Islands.
The United States Geological Survey
will publish , before long some facts
about the volcanoes of the Philippines,
which appear to be very Interesting.
One of them is the most symmetrically
beautiful ; volcanic cone in the world.
being even more perfect than the fa
mous Fujiyama, the sacred mountain
of Japan. It is little less than 9,000
feet high, and the name of it is Albay.
Albay was an exceedingly active vol
cano during the last century, having
burst into eruption at "least twenty
five times since the year 1800. It broke
out only last year with renewed plu
tonlc activity, and back in 1814 no
fewer than 1,200 lives were lost In con
sequence of one of its bad spells, a vil
lage four miles from the crater being
under lava and ashes to such a depth
that the ridgepoles of the nouses were
Between Albay and Lagnna de Bay
LEAP TO DEATH.
are many extinct or dormant craters.
The magnificent cone of Banajao, 7,382
feet In- height, is visible' from Manila
bay. Its crater, 700 feet deep, was oc
cupied by a lake up to 1730, when a
vllolent eruption took place,, bursting
out the southern side of the. crater and
pouring out both water and incandes
cent lava.. '."
On an island In the Lake of Bombon
Is the remarkable Taal volcano, which
is readily Accessible from Manila. Its
central crater is oval in shape, a mile
and a quarter across the greatest di
ameter and has within : its rim two
lakes- of hot water, one yellow and the
other green, and a small active cone
fifty feet in height from which escape
steam and sulphurous gases. The
strange colors of the waters are due to
the presence of chemicals evolved In
subterranean laboratories. . .-
The greatest eruption of Taal' took
place in 1754, wiping out four villages.
Apparently the volcanic ash lends won
derful fertility to the soil, and present
ly a new growth of bamboo and palms
appears where desolation had reigned.
Even the localities most seriously and
constantly threatened by volcanoes in
the Philippines, are promptly repopu
lated after every disaster, their fertil
ity, surpassingly- beautiful situation
and healthfulness charming the people
Into a prompt forgetf ulness of past
disasters. - ;
The worst volcanic disturbances on
record In the Philippines occurred Jan,
4, 1641. : They seem to have centralized
at the southern end of Mindanao, where
there is a formidable group of "fire
mountains," as the natives call them.
Three outbursts took place on that day
in different portions of the archipelago,
accompanied by earthquakes" which
were felt as far away as Cochin China
and Cambodia. .: A Spanish - squadron
was off the south coast of Mindanao,
and some of the Bhips. were almost
overwhelmed by - falling - ashes.," In
Luzon, in Union province, "three hills
and several villages were thrown into
the air in fragments and utterly anni
hilated." New York Herald. ;i
An Interesting; Ceremony. '
r Every day an interesting ceremony
takes place at Gibraltar. The town
and fortress lie at the end of a penin
sula, about a mile and a half long, the
mainland being Spanish territory. The
gate leading to Spain is, every evening,
locked at sunset, and every morning un
locked at sunrise. Each day a com
piny from one of ,the -regiments per
forms one of these functions. In the
morning the company, fully officered.
With colors flying and accompanied by
a band, marches to the commandant's
house. The company comes to atten
tion, and the commandant hands out
the keys on a, velvet cushion. These
are received by a captain's orderly, the
band strikes, up, and the procession
marches to the gate, which is unlocked
with great ceremony. , In the evening
the same ceremony, in the reverse-order,
is gone through. " All suspicious
characters are put out of the town be
fore the gates are locked in the even
ing, ""v - .
What a terrible lot of time is wasted
In the course of a life time, in waiting
at table to be served with something
not fit to eat!
: A hard working man looks disdain
fully at the man who has to take ex
ercise. .:, :
HUMOli OF THE WEEK
STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Odd, Curious and Laughable Phases
1 of Human Nature Graphically Por
trayed by Eminent Word Artiste of
Our Own Day-A Budget of Fun.
"I wonder where the entrance to the
subway is," said a lady standing on
Tremont street on her first visit to Boa-
ton. :;' - - - ' . "
"I don't know, I'm sure," replied the
lady who was with her, "but let's go
over here. Here's a door with a sign
'exit' over It." Somervllle Journal.
A Guilty Conscience.
- "Yes, sir' said the patient salesman,
"I've shown you our entire stock of
gold and silver watch-chams."
"Well, they ain't the kind I want"
replied the cranky customer. "I don't
propose to buy what I don't -want" .
"Certainly- not sir. . Perhaps you
want a steel one."
"What's that? Jest you come out
here, an I'll show you if I want to
steal one!" Catholic Standard. 1
Wise Old Merchant.
Old Merchant Where Is your refer
ence? - -
Tommy Tucker (who wants a job as
office boy) Here's one from my Sun
day school teacher, sir. --
Old Merchant We don't want you to
work on Sundays. : Get me a reference
from some one who knows you on week
" ' Merely to Be Pitied. '
"What do you think of the Chicago
professor who says he never kissed a
pretty girl?" said one young woman.
"Oh, 1 don't stop to think," answered
the other. "I have no time to listen to
other people's troubles."Washington
For All Causes.
Man loves to kick with migHt and main;
Sad sounds best fit his mouth.
He'll first complain about the rain
And then about the drouth.
Washington Star. -
Mrs. Brown My husband never says
anything to me. about the way his
mother used to cook.
Mrs. Green That's something un
usual. I wonder why he doesn't?
Mrs. Brown She used to keep a
boarding house. Chicago News.
"Education may be a good thing,"
said the man with the stubby mus
tache, "but if my parents had not in
stilled in my mind so great a reverence
for grammar I am almost sure I could
have been a poet" Indianapolis Press.
" ' - " Hla Tmaoination. .
r Percollum What are you working at
Spacer I've got an assignment to
write an article on "How to Be Happy
Though Mo ving."r-Chlcago Tribune.
V:. Typical Fire Escape.
Guest What precautions- have you
here in case of fire? ; ' ,
: Hotel Clerk We have fire escapes
from every- floor. "All you have to do.
Is to make your way to one of them
and fall off New York Weekly.
"Well, that don't effect our going in
'cause we can't swim." :
The Law's Delay.
Peasant After you've let the "case
drag along now for three years, you've
lost it for me!
Lawyer Hm! That's what I get for
my good nature I might have let it
drag along for . three years , more!
Heitere Welt ;
: Meant Just What He Said.
v Pupil Where is Atoms?
- Teacher You mean Athens, Johnnie.
It is in Greece.- -
- Pupil- No, I don't mean Athens. I
mean Atoms, the place " people get
blown to in boiler explosions. Balti
Blffer My wife Is subject to nervous
headaches; can't stand a bit of noise.
Buffer Too bad! "
Blffer Yes; why, I even had to sell
my new golf suit Ohio State Journal.
; r" His Grounds.
. "And on what ground do you base
your application for divorce?" asked
the lawyer of his new client -i
"Exertion, sah." - -,.'.v
"You mean desertion, I , suppose
Your wife has left you, doubtless."
"No, sah, she hasn't left me, sab."
- "Then you can't ask for a divorce on
the ground of desertion.". -.
;"I said exertion, sah. Dat's de ground
perzackly. .. She done exert herself con
tinually to make me mlzzable, sah.
Put it on de ground pb exertion, sah."
: Everybody Wants rt.
"Well, the Northern Pacific corner
didn't last long. That shows how hard
it is to get a corner in railroads."
"Yes, and If you've noticed, it's next
to Impossible," replied the end seat
hog, "to get a corner lit street cars."
Philadelphia Press. -
His Fntnre Field.
"John gays he'll have hig graduation
papers purty soon."
Whafa he been a-larnln' off
'Greek, an' Latin, an' French, "an'
German, an' so forth."
'An', what" s he goln' to do atter be
"Well ef he don't go to spllttin' rails.
or f armln', I reckon he'll spend the rest
of his days a-wrltln' of dialect!" At
Husband Thank heaven, houseclean
lng is over.
Wife Yes, dear, but the pictures are
yet to be hung. Ohio State Journal
The Dramatic Crane.
Mr. Fijjit Our friend Epicure haa
gotten out a new cook book.
Mrs. Fijjit That's nice; ls jt going to
be dramatized? Ohio State Journal.
"Brlggs says his daughter looks like
him. Did you ever see her?"
"No, and I never want to see her If
she looks like Brlggs." Cleveland Plain
The First Question.
"I see that an Indiana court has de
cided that a passenger traveling on a
pass can recover damages for injuries
due to carelessness of the train em
"Yes, but ha .wdo you get the pass?"
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
More A 'raid of Losing; the Girl.
"Aren't you afraid to keep such a
pretty girl In your kitchen? You may
lose your husband."
"I guess you don't know that the
present ratio Is something like fifty
husbands -to one competent girl."
Cleveland Plain Dealer. :
Son (at his studies) Papa, I wish I
had been born in the time of Charle
magne. Father Why? - .; .
' Son Then I wouldn't have had to
learn everything that has happened
since. Fliegende Blaetter.
Ethel He telegraphed his proposal
to her. . - , ;.
Maude And did she accept him? :
Ethel No; she said that she had no
use for a man who would waste his
money on telegraph tolls, instead of
spending It for caramels. Somervllle
Journal. : -
Misguided Young Man,
Ned Does Arthur play golf an Sun
Tom Well, he thinks he does. Som
A Very Iconic Eermon.
Bobby Say, pop. how much did you':
put in the follection plate?
His Papa Sh! A dime, Bobby. ,
Bobby That preacher is certainly
giving you an awful lot for your money. '
? He p n'ar Him.
Mr. Backward Well-er-yes,' since:
you ask me, I was thinking of consult
ing a fortune teller. .
: Miss Coy To find out when you- will -marry,
eh? . - : . i . : .
- Mr. Backward Why -er-yes; I
Miss Coy Why not ask me and save .
the fortune-teller's fee toward .the
price of the ring? Philadelphia Press.
, Ait Inversion. -"Does
Mr. BUlionson play "golf ?"" '
: "No. He works at go!C When he
wants a. little real diversion be goes
into the stock market" Washington
:' Her llioaric. "
.Mr.; Poore Will nothing induce you :
to marry? . " . ; , ' - ..-
Miss Witte On the contrary. It la
the nothing you have which induces me.
not to marry. . , .
Her Misapprehension. ,
Mr. Crimsonbeak. Well, I see that
Englishman has got his Gainsborough
back, after twenty years.
Mrs. Crimsonbeak I shouldn't think
his wife would care for it now; it's out.
of style. ;
. "Out nothing; a picture as valuable
as that -is never out of style." .
"Oh, is it a picture? I thought all
along that the Gainsborough' was a
hat!" Yonkei-8 Statesman. ' '--
Too Rich for Him. .
Jinks (meeting Winks in light lunch
cafe) Hello! What are you doing
here?. ' - -
Winks Getting my lunch, of course." .
Jinks But I thought you were keep
ing a swell restaurant down town. - - -
Winks So I am, but I wouldn't keep
It long If I ate there. It's too expen
sive. Philadelphia Press.
Eggs of Insects.
' The collection, preservation and ex
amination of the eggs of insects will '
afford interesting recreation. Curtains,
carpets, floor-crevices, cushions, furs
and woolen garments will serve as a
prolific hunting ground indoors; while
out of doors the surface waters of
ponds and water-butts, the corpses of
birds, the skins of cattle, and the leaves
and branches of the shrubberies give
an abundance of material.
Among those Insects whose eggs
make the most Interesting microscopi
cal mounts may be noted the common ,
house-fly, the wasp, the tortoise-shell
and cabbage butterflies, the . mottled
umber and the puss moths, the dragon
fly, and most of the parasites. The eggs
of these are all shapes, hexagonal, coni
cal, oval, spherical, and are most richly
and harmoniously colored; while the
elaborately : sculptured surfaces . are
hardly excelled In the beauty of their
designs by the symmetry of the ciliat
ed, winged and fringed ornamentations
with which they are surrounded.
Polish usually exaggerates the re
flections of a fool.