The Columbian., March 28, 1884, Image 4

TUB MODERN PICNIC.
"Yottmust wake and call me early; call n
early, mother dear,
For our association starts its picnic from the
pier.
"We've a couple of lads to dance, mother, and
a down or bo to spar,
And I am to run the bar, mother, I am to run
the bar!
"The boys are perfect gents, mother, though
they're fond of getting high.
So, just wrap up the cartridges and pistols
with the pie.
If any Sunday schools, mother, should picnic
thereabout, J
We're able to knock 'em out, mother, we're
able to knock 'em out.
"Of course, there will bo rows, mother; if
there wasn't it would be queer.
When I serve them all with mugs of froth,
where they've called aloud for beer;
But what can you expect, mother, when a
couple of hundred meet,
Who would rather fight than eat, mother,
who would rather tight than eat!
"If I shouldn't come home at all, mother,
through being a bit too game,
Just work the hospital list, mother, until you
find mv name;
Or else at the station house, xnotlier, though
the cops would hardly dare,
Yet you 11 possibly find me there, mother,
j-ou'll possibly find me there!"
A PLEA FOR RAILROAD MEN.
The Ticket-Agent's, the Conductor'
and the Brakeman's Mlde off the
question. s
Louisville Courier-Journal.
It is a popular belief among people
who travel but little that everybody
connected with the operation of a rail
road train is cross and impolite never
giving a civil answ er to a civil question,
and never cariug whether "school keops
or not." 1 hi -j is a mistake. L-eeause
the ticket agent answers your question:
"W.ll you please tell me what time tha
train fctarcs for BlankviLe. and which
car must I take?"' with a plain "i:15;
first car;" it is not asisrn of ill-breediug,
or-surliness. He will be asked that
same question perhaps 100 times before
the Blaukvih'o accommodation starts,
beside-? any number of others that have
no connection whatever with him or the
train and he knows it. His time is
va'tiab e, and he puts his answer in the
fewest words possible in order to econo
mize time ai-d save breath.
And then the brakeman is not a fiend
in human shape, whose maia object in
life is to mystify and render miserable
the unsuspecting uncommercial trav
eler. The brakeman generally receives
the smallest pay and does the hardest
work on the train. When the locomo
tive "slips an eccentric," or the sleeping
car gets a hot box, it is his duty to run
back a mile or two through the snow to
flag the freight, which is following at a
comparatively short distance. At the
station he helps juggle your baggage,
and on the car he must "on brakes" at
the down grade, "on brakes" at the
crossing, and "on brakes' at the stop.
He answers your question as to "where
we are" hurriedly, because he is al
ways in a hurry; and for the same
reason he'suddenly sticks his head in
the door and calls, "Humboldtlandin
changekyarfurileniphis," then bobs out
egain. His is a hard lot,, and he seldom
remains with the company long enough
to . accumulate a fortune and end his
days in luiury and ease.
"When the conductor asks you two or
three times during a short journey for
your ticket it is not for pure cussed
ness or because he thinks you are steal
ing a ride. On him alone rests the
responsibility for the safety of the
entire train. He knows that his train
must meet No. 3 at a given point ; that
he is behind, and that Xo. 10 freight
is less than an hour behind him. All
this weighs heavily upon him, and it
keeps his mind fully occupied.
But of course there are men in the
business who have not the breeding of
an English sparrow, and who would
sooner offer an insult than give a civil
answer. These are not the rule, but
simply the necessary exceptions which
to to make the rule good.
A Portable Body-Heater.
New Haven News.
A Bridgeport, Conn., professor has
invented a neat thing in the way of a
steam heater to carry about on the per
son. It is called the "portable body
steam neater. J. lie apparatus is a
small affair, consisting of a copper
boiler, under which is a diminutive
lamp, all incased in a nickel box, and
balanced something like a compass, so
that, no matter what position the outside
box is in, the boiler and lamp will
always remain in the required ver
tical position. The entire apparatus
is so small that it can be carried in the
pocket. After the lamp is lighted, the
water in the boiler is- heated and eircu
lated through rubber tubes, which run
down the legs around the ankles, up
around the back, and back to the boiler.
The circulation of the warm water
keeps the body warm on the coldest
dav. A safety valve and escape for a
higher pressure of steam than the affair
is ul.o.ved to carry flows off at the back
of the wearer's neck. Elaborate heat
ers are being constructed for ladies
wear. They can be worn inside the bus
tle and entirely obscured. Before going
out of the house the lady's maid can
light the lamp, which, by the way, is
guaged to run six, eight, or ten hours,
and "my ladv" walks out under a free
pressure of steam, and warranted to be
kept warm during the promenade
Terrible Slaughter of Dndea.
Louisville Commercial.
A practical test of Joe Mulbattan's dude
annilulator was made at ilaca--ley's theatre
last night. As usual, the dudes posted them
selves along the walls of the vestibule to
stare the audience out of countenance as they
emerged from the theatre. About that time
Eugene Elrod, the well-known fire plug,
placed a small quantity of dynamite in the
annihilator and touched a secret spring.
There was a flash, a loud report, and the air
was filled with a mangled mass of dudes, who
were completely pulverized and floated off
into space beyond the earth's attraction,
probably to form the tail of a comet, or
something of that sort. The test was en
tirely satisfactory. Not a dude escaped. All
stood with their backs to the wad of the
vestibule and were annihilated. A balloon
will be sent out at once to discover if possi
ble their remains, even in a pulverized state,
and bring them back here for burial, but it is
feared the effort will be a fruitless one. An
other test of the annihilator will be made at
Macauley's theatre this evening, and all
dudes in good and regular standing are in
vited to be present.
No Middle Xames Wanted.
I New York Sun.
Two Christian names are one more
than any man, even one weighed with
the greatest responsibilities, need have.
One Christian name is shorter, more
vigorous, takes less time to write, has
fewer initials to mark on handkerchiefs,
and, in our judgment, miAes an alto
gether more sensible sort of a title than
"William P. Jones or Thomas Q. J.
Smith. Moreover, of the seventeen
men who have been elected to the of
fice of president, twelve, beginning
with George Washington and ending
with Abraham Lincoln, have had only
two initials.
AN OYSTER PATTY MAN.
Brilliant Triumph of a Coll nary
Artist In a Xew York Restaurant.
New York Times.
I have watched that handsome young
Irishman who dispenses these oyster
patties for a very long time, and I be
lieve I am a martyr to the cause of hu
man knowledge. How many times
have I not partaken of these patties,
when I really loathed them ? It is the
fascinating manner of making theai up
which leads me irresistibly to
his counter. Often and often
my appetite would have inclined
me toward the 10-cent sandwich
but I have passed by this economic food
and gone to that particular part of the
restaurant sacred to the patty. Usu
ally it is thronged. Long succes -.ions
of oyster-patty eaters wait patiently
here for their delectable morsels. To
the extreme left of the counter stands
the oyster-patty man, and to the right
his rival, the chicken-patty man. But
for one chickea-patty eaten there are
fifty oyster-patties eaten.
Ear be it from me to ignore the
merit of the chicken artist. He is quite
perfect in his way. Still there are
wide differences between the two, and
the.e arise from divergence of material.
Chicken has not the plastic qualities of
the oyster. Chicken refuses to yield to
the dab of a spoon because of its in
herent resistance. It is not homo
geneous. No skill of a cook can make
uniform fragments of chicken breast,
whereas with oysters nature molds
them one like another, and they have
sliding qualities peculiar to themselves.
If the chichen patty man had oysters
to serve he might in time be the rival
of the young Irishman. Eate, however,
has decided it otherwise.
There are eight movements. (1.)
The artist seizes a hot plate with his
right hand (2 ) and with his left whisks
off the dish cover. In the dish warmer
are two compartments; in one are the
oysters, in the other the shells of light
est crust. (3.) With a fork he dexter
ously spears a shell and slides it on a
plate. I think after a few years of de
termined practice a man of fair ability
might accomplish this much. This is
only the first part, however, the rough
outline, as it were, but the art now
comes in the filling up. (4.) The spoon
is seized. (.5 and 6.) Two dips are taken
of the oysters, which are ladled -into
the crust. (7.) The spoon is replaced.
(8.) The cover is put on. This is the
bare, brief analysis of the manipula
tions. But how delicate and complex are the
shadings, and, to mix the metaphor,
how perfect the rhythm ! The cover is
taken off noiselessly, though it weighs
ten pounds fully. When it is put on a
little clang is heard. I have often
wondered why this finale is audible. I
know that in the studied cadence of true
poetry the conclusion of the sonnet must
be accentuated. This young Irishman,
as a true artist, feels unconsciously the
necessity of a sonorous ending. But
what chiefly delights me is the slinging
back of the spoon into the dish.- Xow
how can a powerfully-built young man
throw a big, clumsy-looking spoon into
a slab mixture of oysters and sauce and
make no splash ? Look at his clean, white
apron. Examine the counter around
him, and never, never does an atom of
anything flv from that dish. He abso
lutely hurls that spoon back, and there
is no bespattering of nis surroundings.
There never is anv hesitation in his
play, and still it should be remembered
that acute mental action follows every
physical movement. He is obliged to
count the oysters. Think of a thou
sand oyster patties to be distributed
everv dav, and heedlessness on his part
in the giving of only one single oyster
too much in eaca portion ! 1 hen would
come ruin and bankruptcy to the res
taurant proprietors.
Art Anont the Ineas.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
Prof. F. W. Putnam, in his lecture
on "Ancient Peruvian Art, said that
the traces left by thelncas have shown
that they were a tribe possessed of the
greatest skill in a number of fine arts,
such as we iving, ceramics, delicately
formed designs of pottery, and other
artistic pursuits. In the portions of
Peru inhabited by the Incas one can
scarcely penetrate the ground to any
depth without unearthing the remains
of a member of the tribe. All were
buried in a manner peculiar to the
creed. The knees were drawn up to
tffe chin, the body surrounded by a
casement of cloth and cotton ; and the re
mains of one of the tribe recently found
was wrapped in the same manner, t:e
case containing a rag with the stamp of
the Lowell cotton-mills, demonstrating
that the mode of biuial was carried
down from their ancestors.
Prof. Putnam exhibited a number of
designs of the specimens of the intri
cate weaving and tapestry work per
formed bv the Inca tr.be. I he l'eru
vians were great cotton ra:sers, and
the specimens of cotton work lound
have been pronounced by good judges
as superior to the sea island cotton of
the present day. The garments were
as soft and delicate as could be made
from wool, and the colors were all fast,
particularly the blue and green. The
fast colors are secured from different
dyes, and are in such a perfect state of
preservation to-day that chemists have
been puzzled when endeavor."n to as
certain how theso ancient tr;ues per
formed the work so effectually and
lasting.
Harriet Slartineau'M Home.
Miss Susan B. Anthony recently
visited in England the former home of
Harriet Martmeau, which now is oc
cupied by a Quaker family. "I chatted
with these Friends." she says, "in the
drawing-room where Emerson, Garri
son, Charlotte Bronte, and many of the
other great sons of earth 1) ad come to
honor Harriet Martineau in the days
gone by. I sat at the table in her
library where she had penned so many
noble thoughts, looked into the chamber
where she had slept, suffered, and died,
and out at the beautiful landscape she
enjoyed in those last sad days. In the
kitchen the.same range, dresser, table,
and chairs stand there as she left them,
and her favorite black and yellow
spotted cat, now 16 years old, still keeps
faithful watch on the threshold."
Jinns Tongue.
Inter Ocean.
The Japanese premier. Prince Kung,
addressed Gen. Grant, when he was in
Japan, in English, so-called. Endeav
oring to compliment him by assuring
him that he was born to command, he
said: "Sire, brave generale, you vas
made to order."
Chicago Weekly Magazine: With
the person who manifests any curiosity
about our private business affairs we al
ways need to bo on our guard.
In Siberia the price of a first doss
wife is eight sledge dogs.
THE FIRST STEAMBOAT
WHISTLE.
Kansas City Star.
The story of the first steam whistle
on the Missouri river is amusing. Its
introduction dates back to 1844. At
that time the settlers on the Missouri
river were in the habit ot making regu
lar yearly visita to St. Louis to do their
trading for themselves and their friends
They were not provided with daily in
tercourse with the outside world, and
many who lived back from the river
seldom, if ever, saw a steamboat more
than once a year. It happened that
during the fall of 1844 the new steam
boat Lexington started up the Missouri
river, loaded down to the guards with
freight.
lhe steamer was provided with a
steam whistle the first used on the
Missouri river and as it happened no
one knew about it except Warner, who
wa a wag and a lover of a joke. The
night after leaving St. Louis the pas
sengers were collected together playing
cards (for fun) in the cabin, when the
talk turned upon . steamboat explo
sions, then very common.
" I feel perfectly safe on this boat,"
said Warner as he dealt the cards.
"Why ?" inquired Yocum the planter.
"Why?" echoed the rest of the com
panv.
"I will tell you why," said the wag,
carefully studvmg Ins cards. . Ihis
boat is provided with a new patent
safety valve, wnich notihes passengers
on board when it is about to blow up
It is a concern which makes a most
unearthly noise, and when you hear it.
it is time to get back aft or jump over
board.
Notwithstanding the fact that Warner
told his story with the most solemn and
earnest countenance, some were skepti
cal. Not so, however, with the planter.
Next morning, when the Lexington was
Fteaming up the long, straight stretch
of river just below Washington, Mo.,
the passengers were at breakfast. The
meal had been called, and all were
busily engaged in doing justice to the
kind of meals they were accustomed to
serve on steamboats in tht.se days. Sud
denly the whistle commenced to blow,
the first time on the trip. The passen
gers looked at each other a moment,
and horror and dismay spread over
their faces. The first man to realize
the situation and act was Yocum, the
planter, who, with hair erect and
blanched face, jumped up, crying as he
pulled over one after anotlu r of the
passengers :
"Bun, run for your lives; the d d
thing is going to bust. Come with me,
and let's save ourselves."
Of course there was a stampede for
the rear of the boat, and it was only by
the exertions of some of the crew that
the more excited , were restrained from
jumping into the river.
DOMESTIC LIFE IN THE DES
ERT.
Blackwood's Magazine.
Domestic life is not without its draw
backs even in the desert. I was on one
occasion invited to the tent of a minor
chief, who was my guide and most
humble servant. He concocted for my
benefit and that of several guefs from
neighl'oring tonts a brew of very thin
coffee with an immense quantity of sugar
a sort of syrup which , ad hardly any
taste save of sugar: and having a small
piece of the sngar-loaf left he gave it to
me on our parting as the only present
he had to offer.
,We sat in this tent for more than an
hour admiring the "masterly inactivity"
of the Arabs, who can apparently sit
silent and quite unemployed for whole
days, and who thus appear to wait with
endless patience the day when civilized
races shall have worn themselves out
by their struggles for existence and the
Arab survivors be left master of the
field. This inactivity is, however, de
lusive, for let it be thought that the
guest is dosing in the evening, and he
may perhaps see these grave, list-less
men creeping like cats, or hopping
nimbly around his person like birds,
feeling his pockets with a delicate
touch, or endeavoring to abstract his
saddle bags from beneath his head.
The Arab is, indeed, a continual
actor. His haughty, frowning air, his
gravity and laziness, his courage and
courtesy, are all assumed as a mask,
hiding a soul which is often mean,
grasping, cowardly and treacherous.
His appearance in the eyes of the Eu
ropean is nothing better than a sham,
and it is only his brother Arab who
knows how to estimate it at its proper
value. As I sat reflecting on these
matters a noise as of women quarreling
arose on the covered side of the tent.
My host assumed an injured air and
went to pacify the contending parties.
His brother, sitting by him, manifested
on his countenance a disgust and irri
tation such as I have rarely seen an
Arab betray. The sheikh returned,
the quarreling continued, and I en
deavored to console him by the reflec
tion that women alw;;ys quarreled in all
oountries in the san:e way; but at
lengtli the brother's pa ienco was worn
out, and he arose with a large stone ia
his hand and looked over the partition
dividing the harem from the pen part
of the tent in winch we saL Without
a wojkI he hurled the stone into the un
seen, and a sound of wailing took the
place of the angry chatter which pre
ceded this assertion of the rights of a
guest to peace and quiet during his
visit.
JIOW A MORMON POUND HIS MULE.
Chicago Herald.
In Beaver, Utah, lives Brother
Gentry, a latter day saint, who tells
the following mule story : " While hunt
ing a stray mule in the hills east of
Beaver, 1 became lost, and after
wandering arouDd aimlessly for a
couple of days, I rested on the evening
of the second, completely exhausted,
and almost famished from hunger and
thirst. While in this state I saw a
bright light illuminate a distant peak,
and directly aitor I heard a voice say,
'Oh, Brother Gtntry, come hither and
you will fkrd your nmle.' Recognizing
the voice as a divine command, I did
so, And lo and behold, there stood the
mule, quietly grazing in a deep rsvine,
while a bubbling brook made music
over its pebbly bed."
aiajr.be lie ailnses tier lloeC
Exchange.
"I hev alius noticed, observes Aunt
Tabitha, "that the boy who lets his
mother bring in all the kindlin wood
and build the kitchen fire is the mourner
that bellers loudest at her funeral.
And then she added thoughtfully:
"Mebbe as not it is because he misses
her the most.
NO MARKS.
Mr. T. M. Casad, editor of the Corydon,
Iowa, Times, writes that his little eirl
burned her foot severely on a stove. One
application of St. Jacob's Oil, the great
pain-reliever, cured it completely, leaving
no marks. By two applications of St.
Jacob's Oil he cured himself of a torturing
pain in the side.
ALL OVER THE WORLD.
An Aitoniihed Editor -What He Saw and
What He Bays.
"From Greenland's Icy Mountains to Africa's
Sunny Strand,"
Baltimore, Md. The Daily Evening
Jew8 publishes the following eaiioriany:
At the time, the Kpw York Herald, with
characteristic cenerosity, gave the princely
sum of $100,000 to a relief fund, for the
sufferers from famine in Ireland, one of
the most distinguished literary men of
America contributed to to the Art Auto
graph, published for the benefit of that
lund. the followinor note:
"When a distressed nation appeals for
this or that or the other grace or help, she
nears an answerintr voice oi sympainy
from this or that or the other creed or
ktouo or faction, scattered here and there
and yonder in the space of the earth; it
is oniy wnen she asks lor oreaa tnac creea
and party are forgotten, and the whole
world rises to resoond.
While recocmizinflr the force of this sen
timent, the experience which a member of
our editorial stair had yesterday, iurnisnes
unmistakable evidence of the iact tnat tne
want of bread that famine is not the
only thing which causes the "whole world
to rise, and by united action to record en'
thusiastic endorsement of a laudable meas
tire or object. The conviction was occa
sioned bv a visit to a commercial enter
prise, of which, although much has been
said and written, the writer confesses he
Knew nothinsr from personal experience.
prior to his investigations. The following
facts are presented cheerfully, in the belief
that they are not only of real public inter
est, put are oi so extraordinary a nature.
so encouraging to our local pride, as to
demonstrate 'beyond all doubt, that the
agency in question is the most remarkable
ot its kind known in the history of scien
tific discovery.
Uoubtles8 every inventor and every
manufacturer of even an indifferent arti
cle can, without serious difficulty, enlist a
certain amount of local and general influ
ence in support of his products on the
same principle, perhaps, that every politi
cal aspirant nas some followers but the
proofs here under consideration are so
positive, and considering the high sources
supplying tne following statements, they
are so extraordinary and conclusive, that
no sane man can doubt that the expres
sions were called forth by a really marvel-
ons dejrree ot excellence and power.
Here a Congress of Nations, composed
of distinguished leaders in public, mer
cantile, and social circles of all sections of
the world, and in part of eminent profes
sional men, wnose conversation in matters
of this kind is well known, basing their
expressions upon actual experiments and
observations, voluntarily join in public
praise so high and unqualified as to set at
rest ail doubts and prejudices, to silence
skeptics, and to carry conviction to every
fair-minded man.
When our representative examined the
originals of the following forcible docu
ments, he was, as above indicated, so
struck with their extraordinary character,
that he concluded to present them to our
readers, as a matter oi public interest.
This, as before stated, is done cheerfully
and ot our own accord.
GERMANY.
Dr. Richard Oberlaender, Leipzig, Ger
many, secretary ethnological Museum,
F. S. U. G. A., M. G. S., author of Fremde
Voelker (Foreign Nations), and a distin
guished literateur, writes: "It gives me
great pleasure to inform vou that, having
been troubled with my old chronic neural
gic pains, a traveling companion advised
me to use St. Jacobs Oil, the great pain
reliever. 1 tried it, and was entirely cured
1 am now- supplied with a bottle, and will
never be without one.
ENGLAND.
Messrs. Francis Newberry & Son, Lon
don. Encland. established for 12o vears.
write: As a testimonial from one of the
oldest drue-kouses in Great Britain, re
specting your houehold remedy, will no
doubt be or interest to vou, we are pleased
to make the statement that we have sold.
with satisfaction to the public, St. Jacobs
Oil for several years, and that, owing to
the extraordinary merits of the article,
the demand is constinually increasing,
and that we have heard of many favorable
rereports regarding its jrreat virtue as a
parn-cunnR remedy.
AUSTRALIA.
United States Consulate,
Sydney. X. S. Wales. Auanist H. 1883.
I, Charles Kahlo, Consul of the United States
of America at Sydney and its dependencies, do
hereby certify that C. C. Cohen appeared before
me thin day and acknowledged ttiat he bad
sisrned the following: instrument as his free and
voluntary act. Given under my hand and seal
of this Consulate, the day and year above writ
ten. CHARLES KAHLO, V. . Consul,
Some three years ago I injured my left
leg and knee to the extent that I thought
I had become a permanent cripple. My
knee-cap was twice its natural size, and
mv lee was so contracted and shortened
that I could not walk without considerable
pain and inconvenience. During that time
I had tried remedies innumerable, but
without receiving the slightest benefit un
til 1 gave St. Jacobs Oil, the great pain
cure, a trial, and much to my delight and
astonishment I began to get better; both
my leg and knee assumed their normal
condition, and to-day I am free from pain
and can walk as well as ever I did in my
life. I feel it incumbent on my part to in
form the public of the great benefit I have
received, and heartily recommend St. Ja
cobs Oil to any one sintering from pain,
and feel satisfied it has no equal as a cure
i C. C. Cohen.
Note. The Sydney, New South Wales
"News." in reference to cures like the above,
savs editorially: It is being1 made plain to alL
that never in the history of Australia, has a
medical discovered beea accepted by the public
with such general approbation as tot. Jacobs Oil
Its cures are simply marvelous.
NEW ZEALAND.
At the New Zealand International Exhi
bition, the magnificent First Prize Medal
and Hiahest Diploma were awarded to bt.
Jacobs Oil as the best pain-curing and
healing remedy known to mankind, and
among the valuable testimonials given in
support of them, Mr. m. Moor, coach
builder, Christ Church, N. Z., certifies
that one application of bt. Jacobs Oil
cured him or Sciatica, which statement
was attested by Mr. W. Gee, of the Post
office Department, and Mr. John Black
mere, Sergeant of the Armed Constabu
lary.
CAPE OF GOOD nOPE.
Lion. Godfrev Sichel. member of the
Parliament or the colony, cape or uood
Hodc South Africa, according to the offi
cial report of the proceedings, published
in The Journal, uranamstown, cape or
Good Hope, arose and said: lie could speak
from experience: he had spent a small
fortune, and could obtain no relief from
the medical profession. He had tried cal
omel, quinine, strychnine, and finally St.
Jacobs Oil, and it cured him. If members
afflicted with Neuralgia would only take
his advice they would get a bottle of bt.
Jacobs Oil, and it would cure them.
CANADA.
The Hon. Billa Flint. Life Senator of the
Dominion Parliament. liellevme, unt&rlo.
Canada, writes: "I tried St. Jacobs Oil foi
ague In mv face and toothache. It acted
like a charm. A few times rubbing with
it took away all soreness and pain; better
than having them drawn at the age of
seventy-seven.
EGYPT AND THE HOLY LAND.
Hon. George Colton. the distinguished
oriental traveler, whose interesting letters
from abroad are familiar to the public.
writes, as a result of his close observation
in Egvnt and the lioly L.and, tnat bt. Ja
cobs Oil, by its general use there, is shown
to be a blessing to sunenng numanuy,
and that wherever ho has traveled,
whether in England. France. Germany, or
elsewhere, the same unqualified praise is
given to the Great German Remedy as a
conqueror of pain.
CENTRAL AMERICA.
Renor Mariano. Maradiaea. Ocotal. Nica
ragua, sys that ho had suffered with
rheumatism and that he was Instantly
cured by the use of St. Jacob's Oil, tho
great pain cure.
CUBA.
Dr. D. Antonio Jose Romay, the dis
tinguished physician, Assistant and
Honorarv Member. Board of Health and
Faeultv of the Port Garrison. Havana.
certifies that rheumatism and neuralgia
have, by the use of the great pain cure,
St. Jacob's Oil, been cured in a few days.
MEXICO.
Dr. Manuel S. Izamiirre. Guadalajara,
Jalisco, Mexico, writes: "Being a pro-,
fessor in medicine and surgery, I have
already obtained the best effects of St.
Jacob's Oil in cases of rheumatism, acute
and chronic. I had treated the cases with
different preparations without any result,
but in a short time, by the use of St.
Jacob's Oil, I obtained a complete cure.
I congratulate you on the triumph."
PERU.
Doctors D. Jose FelLx Sudy, founder of
the San Mateo Hospital, and D. Moises
Allende, surgeons and physicians of the
Chilian Army of Occupation during the
war with Peru, were commissioned t6
make a report on the curative properties
of St. Jacob's Oil, and in the execution of
their commission used it upon fully 500
invalids suffering with rheumatism and
neuralgic pains in all parts of fche body,
and upon all kinds of ailments incident
to camp life. After exhaustive experi
ments and complete success in every case,
they certified to the wonderful pain
curing and healing qualities of St, Jacob's
Oil, which they used. The identity of
Doctors Sudy and Allende has been estab
lished before the American Consul, and
Superintendent of the Sanitary service of
Chili in Peru.
Note El Dia (The Day) Callao, Peru, March
16. 1882, says of Dr. Jose Felix Sudy, above
referred to, that he is one of the most distin
guished surgeons now in the field, and that he
has received from Commander Diego A.
Donosa, Lima, Peru, that tho important
assistance which he gave these troops at the
San Mateo Hospital, deserves the high esteem
of all, which is the sentiment of the officers and
soldiers of the battalion.
CHILI.
Senor Ricardo Stuven, a leading com
mission merchant of Valparaiso, after
having exhausted all other remedies has
been completely cured of rheumatism by
the use of St. Jacob's Oil, the great pain
banisher. He makes this public.
SANDWICH ISLANDS.
Hon. S. Crosby, Hawaiian Consul,
Sandwich Islands, says he suffered with
rheumatism, and tried the conqueror of
pain, St. Jacob's Oil. By three applica
tions he was-entirely cured.
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.
Hon. John C. New, Assistant Secretary
U. S. Treasury, writes, that it is a source
of satisfaction and pleasure to give, from
his personal experience, to St. Jacob's Oil,
the conqueror of pain, his cordial recom
mendation. '
General Rufus Ingalls, Quartermaster
General U. S. Army, considers St. Jacob's
Oil the best pain cure for sprains and
bruises ever used. I
Dr. William A. Soula, D. V. S.v the
popular veterinary surgeon, New York,
for nine years in charge of the Third
Avenue Railroad stables, N. Y., certifies
to the curative qualities of St. Jacob's
Oil, the conqueror of pain, as superior: to
all other remedies for all ailments of
hors.es, such as sprains, galls and rheu
matism, that has ever come under his
observation. j
Boston, Mass., has 18,000 more men than
women. j
Piso's Cure for Consumption does not
dry up a cough; it removes the cause.
Milwaukee is going to have a weekly il
lustrated paper.
ADVICE TO C0NSTJMTT1TES.
On the appearance of the first symptoms.
as general debility, loss of appetite, pallor,
chilly sensations, followed by night-sweats
and cough, prompt measures of relief
should be taken. Consumption is scrofu
lous disease of the lungs; therefore use
the great anti-scrofulous or blood-purifier
and strength-restorer, Dr. Pierce's "Golden
Medical Discovery-" Superior to cod liver
oil as a nutritive,- and unsurpassed as a
pectoral. For weak lungs, spitting; of
blood and kindred affections, it hasj no
equal. Sold by druggists. For Dr. Pierce's
treatise on Consumption send two stamps.
World's Dispensary Medical- Associa
tion, Buffalo. N. Y.
Mississippi has seventy-nine deaf mutes
in her State asylum.
Allen's Bilious Physic is a purely vege
table liquid remedy for Headaches, Bil
iousness and Constipation. Easily taken,
acting promptly, relieving quicklv. 25 cts.
At all druggists. Redington, Woodford
& Co., Agents. . j
Ammen's Cough Syrup is not a patent
medicine. No patent has been asked for
or obtained upon it. lo protect tne puonc
from counterfeits and imitations, I the
manufacturer has had the label registered
in Washington. The syrup is made from
pure and costly drugs, and cannot be sold
as cheap to the dealer as the common
patent medicines that are simplv made to
sell, which explains why dishonorable
druggists or dealers trv to sell vou some
thing else when asked for Ammen's
Cough Syrup. It is upon the market upon
its own merit 8. You can buy a sample
bottle for 15 cents, upon which, at the
wholesale price, the manufacturer makes
nothing. Ask to see a large bottle, and
read the label.
There is a constant effort on the part of
that grim monster "Disease to become
master of mortal man. Only a careful ob
servance of natural laws can render his
efforts unavailing. Yet too often injudi
cious excesses, sudden changes, too great
exposure, improper food, or other anuses
of nature, open the gateway and Disease
gains a victory. Sometimes its mastery is
so complete that Nature of herself can
never effect a dislodgment. In such in
stances reinforce nature with a judicious
uRe of Brown b Iron Bitters and we guar
antee, in a short time, all diseases will be
vanished.
4T?-vrmTT n-M Pnuva " 1K AaV for it.
Complete cure, hard or soft corns, warts,
Jay Oould's Atlanta took on 150 tons of
coal at Charleston.
"SIGH NO M0EE, LADIES 1" :
For Dr. Pierce's "Favorite Prescription'
is a prompt and certain remedy for the
painful disorders peculiar to your sex. By
all druggists.
New York's new negro paper is The Xe-
gro-A merxcan. 8
A QUICK RECOVERY.
It gives us great pleasure to state that the
merchant who was reported to be at the point
of death from an attack of Pneumonia, has ent
tirely recovered by the use of DR. WILLIAM
IIALL'S BALSAM FOR TIIE LUNGS. ! Nat
urally he feels grateful for tho benefits derived
from using this remedy for the lungs and throat;
and in giving publicity to this statement wo are
actuated by motives of public benefaction.
trusting that others may be benefited in a simi
lar manner.
"Buchit-Paiba." Quick, complete cure.
all annoying kidney and . urinary i dis
eases. 81.
Brown's Bronchial Troches will relieve
Bronchitis, Asthma, Catarrh, Consump
tive and Throat Diseases. I hey are used
always with good success.
No remedv combines so manv powerful
agents for the relief of pain and ure of
disease as Caloric Vita Oil. Once in the
family it is never excluded.
CATARRH A New Treatment whereby
a permanent cure is effected in from one to
three applications. Particulars and trea
tise free on receipt of stamp. A. H. Dixon
& Son, 305 King street west, Toronto, Can.
Mr. Edwin M. Trafton. North George
town, Mass., says: "My blood received
great benefit from the use of Browrrfc Iron
Bitters."
Chicago's new manual school started
with 350 pupils.
WOMAN AND HER DISEASES
Is the title of a large illustrated treatise.
by Dr. R. V. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y., sent to
any address for three stamps. It teaches
successful self-treatment.
The Zulu Bible has just..been printed in
New York.
Dr. W. B. Prather. Florence. Ga., says:
"Browns Iron Blttera have given satisfac
tion in every instance I have known it
used."
A SECOND EMPHATIC ENDORSEMENT.
Mr. W'm B. Mitchell, editor of the
Journal-Press, St. Cloud, Minn., wrote
to Mr. Wm. Penn Nixon, asking if a card
with his signature, recommending Com
pound Oxygen, was genuine. Mr.
Mitchell writes : "The following letter
from Mr. Wm. Penn Nixon, the well
known editor of the Chicago Inter-Ocean,
explains itself, and will be read with
interest : j
"The Inter-Ocean, 1
Chicago, Jan. 10, 1883. J
"Mr. W. B. Mitchell, St. Cloud, Minn.:
"Dear Sir: I am always , happy to
bear testimouv to the great 'value of
Compound Oxygen, as manufactured by
Drs. Starkey & Palen, Philadelphia,
think it the most important remedy for
throat and lung troubles that was ever
discovered. I feel that it saved my life,
and I am always glad to recommend it to
those suffering from such troubles. The
card was not only genuine, but I endorse
the remedy now as fully as I did in the
card. " Very truly yours, I
"Wm. P. Nixon."
Our "Treatise on Compound Oxygen"
containing a history of the discovery aad
mode of action of this remarkable cura
tive agent, and a large record of surprising
cures in Consumption, Catarrh, Neuralgia,
Bronchitis, Asthma, etc., and a wide range
of chronic diseases, will be sent free. Ad
dress Drs. Starket & Palen, 1109 and
1111 Girard street, Philadelphia.
All orders for the Compound Oxygen
Home Treatment directed to II. E. Ma
thews, 000 Montgomery Street,! San Fran
cisco, will be filled on the same terms as if
sent directly to us in Puiladelphia.
It's because there is so much bustle
aboard a vessel that we call it a "she."
For a cough or a cold there is no remedy
equal to Ammen's Cough Syrup.
"RouH on Coughs." 15c, 25c, 50c, at
Druggists. Complete cure Coughs, Hoarse
ness, Sore Throat.
"Dr. Pierce's Magnetic Elastic Truss" is
advertised in another column of this pa
per. This establishment is well known on
the Pacific Coast as reliable and square in
all its dealings. Their goods have gained
an enviable reputation. :
Rheumatism, Neuralgia, Sciatica,
Lumbago. Backache, Headache, Toothache,
Bnrni, -nld. troat Bites.
AND ALh OTIIEU IIOUILV PA1SS HD ACHES.
SaMkr DroilliU and Dem)emeerTBr. Tlftj Cut a bottl
Direction Id 11 l.ang ue.
l ui, v - - n. ' " ,7; " i r- a .
1 1 A. vuusua a , .
HALL'S PULMONARY BALSAM
The beet remedy In use for COUGHS. COLDS,
ASTHMA. BRONCHITIS. INFLUENZA,
CROUP, INCIPIENT CONSUMPTION,
and all THROAT and LUNG TROUBLES.
Sold by all drutrorists for SO cnts.
f . K. UATKH A CO Proprietors,
417 NaoMomo Ntreet. N. F
THJTT
(POLLS
TORPID BOWELS,
DISORDERED LIVER,
and MALARIA-
Prom these sources arise three-ionrtns ox
tae diseases of the human race. These
symptoms indicate theirexietence : Xom oi
Apptit, Rowels costive Sick Head
ache, fullness after catinsr, aversion to
exertion ot body or mind Eructation
ot food. Irritability of temper, JJovV
spirits, A. reeling or having- neglecter
some datr IMzzlness, Flattering mt the
Heart, lots before tho eves, blgbly col
ored trine, CONSTIPATION, and de
mand the use of a remedy that acts d i rect ly
on the Liver. AsaLiver medicine T.CTT'S
PIXIES have no equal. Their action ontba
Kidneys and Skin is also prompt ; removing
all impurities through theso three scav
enger of tho system," producing ffppe
tlte, sound disresrion, regular stools, a clear
skinanda vigorous body. fXVTT'S PIXIES
cause no nausea or griping not interfere
with dally work and are a perfect
ANTIDOTE TO MALARIA.
8oldTerywhre,a5. 01H.44 Mnrrny 8t.,N.Y.
tutts hair dye.
Gbat Hair or WniSKEBS changed in
Stantly to a Gtx)8ST Bick by afdngle an.
plication of this DTE. Sold by Druggist,
or sent by express on receipt of la
Office, 4 A Murray Strewt, New York.
TUTT'S MAHIIA", OF USEFUL RECEIPTS FREE,
We have spent over S100.000.00 in def ending
our rlKht to the Durham Bull ax our trade-mark.
Undoubtedly be is to-day the most valuable Hull
la the world. Kow it utatids to rvauvm that we
couldnt afford to protect him ro thoroughly if
RliACKWKMM BULK IH KHA.H To
bacco, of which he is the representative, warn t
the liKST temoking Tobacco ever made.
to.lallaatafa. fl
The Mies of BlackweU'd Bull Durham 8mokln;
Tobacco far exceed thoe of nny other brand m
the world, Bimply because it ban been, ia, and will
be, the bent that can be made. All dealers have it
Look for trado-iuark of the Bull on every package.
Mm. .ml tha. bin tham nun airaio. I maaa a radi
k.
cal cure. I bare made the dlaeaae of FITS, EPILKPS
or FAIXIWO SICKNESS a lire-long jtady. twuwtm
remedy to core the worat cam Bc- ore bT
tailed l do toaaon for not now reeaUlng a
JSeTfor a treatlae and a J?" f tia
vemedy. Oie Kzpreas nd Foal Offloe. It ceate yo
aothlnr fnr a trial, and.1 will core yna. , - v
IddroM pr H. O. BOOT. J Fearl St., Jfew Tor.
this BFXr or Itejrcm
tor a made expreaaly tor
the cure of deranirenients
of the frenerattve orvana.
There Is no miatake about
this lnatmment, the con
tinuous stream of KI.EO
TRICITY permeatlne
throe the parts man
rcatoro them to healthy
Action. Do not confound
W.l with Electrio Celt
p4rerttaed to cure all liu
trom head to te. It la f 01
. 1 s v L' inn no rrmM
tor circulars glTlna- full tnr ormauon, aoaraa uann
dmtrto SU Cv. m WMhiostoa tU Chicago, 10.
ML j" fit
I
viV.i. ay
Tho Strongest and DostZ
THOMAS PKICE. Analytic ChemUl. pronounces
the OIANT BAKING ruWDKR nearly one-third
stronger than any sold on the 1'acffic Coaxt
Ran Francisco, Beptember24, 1883.
H. K BOTH IN, Prident Bothln MTgtJo.:
Dkar Sir: After careful and compute chemical
.snalyais of a can of Giant Baking Powder, purchased
by us In open market, we find that it does not con
tain alum, acid phosphate, terra alba, or any injuri
ous substances, but is a pure, healtlJul Cream Tar
tar Baking I'owdor, and as such can recommend it
te oonsuniers. vfJL T. WENZELL A CO.,
We concur- & nalytio Chomlats.
K. BEVERLY COLE, K. 1).,
J. L. HEARS. M. IJ . Health Officer.
ALFRED W. PERRY, M.D.,1 Members of 8s n
W. A. POT7 G Ii A Hri, M. 1., J-Franciseo Board
AVQ. AXERS, M. V.. ) of Health.
Irlannfartiired by (be
BOTHIN. MT'O COMPANY,
17 and 19 Main Street, San Francisco.
The want of a reli
able diuretic which,
while acting as a
stimulant of the kid
neys, neither excitea
nor irritates thorn,
was long since sun
plied by Hostetter's
Htomach Bitters. This
fine medicine exerts
the rerjuiHite degree
of stimulation upon
theae organs without
producing- irritation,
and U, therefore, far
better adapted for the
purpose than un
nieillcated excitants
often resorted to.
DyHpvpsia, ferer and
aun and kisdred
(iiwaaes, are all cured
by it. For sale by all
BrugglMt and Dealers
Kent-rally
SKI1T HUMOR.
My baby, six month old, broke out vrtth some kind of
kin humor, and after being treated five months by my
family physicion was giren up to die. The druggiat
recommended Ha lf 's hpecliic, and the effect was as
gratifyiag as it w-a miraculous. My child soon got well,
ail traces of the dtaeate i gone, and he is as fat as a pig.
J. J. Kihklani, Mindtn, Rusk County, Texas.
I have suffered for many years from nlcers on my legs,
often very large and painful, during which time I ttaed
almost everything te effect a cure, but in vain. I took
Bwift's Specific by advice of a friend, and In a short time
was oured sound and well. Edwiv J. Miller.
Beaumont, Texas.
I have been afflicted with Scrofula for twelve years,
and have had sores on nib as large as a man's hand for
that length of time. Ijtst sunmi-r 1 was so bail off that
I oonlcl not wear clothing. I had spent hundreds of
dollars in the effort to be cuml, but all to no purpose,
and had injured myself with Mercury and Potash. V'our
Bwift's Specific cured me promptly and permanently,
and I hope every like sufferer will take it.
K. IL Hioh. Lakonl, Ark.
Our Treatise on Blood and Skin Diseases mailed tree
to applicants.
a. THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO..
Drawer 3, Atlanta, Ga.
New York Offloe, 159 West 23d St., between Sixth and
Seventh Avenues. .
PIANOS.
OTCIfJlff AV KKAXIIH . liAClf.
0 I LI II I A I .Gablcr, Roonish Pianos; Burdett
organs, band Instruments. Largest stock ef Sheet
Musio and Books. Bands supplied at Eastern prioea,
M. CRAY, 2C Post Stroet, San rrantisoo.
nil linn 5,000 New and Second-hand llanos
HlfllillN ai half price, Pianisf75 and up. Anti-
1 InllUU sell I'iano Factory. 21 A 2ti Ellis ril. H.B
1
AZELTOX PIAKOM, HEXHAM
Pianos, Standard Organs, Sheet Musia, and Musical
Merchandise of every description at the Mmirl
MumIc More, 735 Market Mreef.Knn Fran
Cisco. Bend lor eur catalogue of 10-cent tnnsto.
CM as. rt. r.A i ufl,
A. M. BENHAM.
PI 4X0.4 Decker Bros., Behr Uros., Emerson, and J
and C. Fifher. Musical Merchandise. Organs
Mson, Hamlin A: Chase. Kobler At fhaae.137 PowtHt..B.l
X. P. N. U. No. 15.-. h N. II. No. P2.
Yii 2 h S C r"t M BOOM y fi'i'ige K?
Br 1 w''w' ' Him will hrinir
I you in HUNQREDS Of DOLLARS. iryoMCut lhiao.it
I and send lo inn with 10 eta. : buKiness new. lorlailli-s
J or genla. dmie al home, a bor or girl can learn it In an
U hour (silublii. 11. i. FAY, Rutland. Vermont
'lt;'f
Wli.Vlt OUT.
tnsil2ao. Circular
Ani r"s watchmakers. By mail io. Circulars,
OCJ lasDi.-m. J.S. Baca ACo.. 88 Per St.. N. Y.
Easy tonne. A certain core. Not expensive. Three
months' treatment in one package. Good for Cold
In the Head, Headache. Dizziness. Hay Fever, fco.
Fifty cents. By all DruggiMts. or by mall.
r L T. KAZKLTINK Warn
it II.
arren, Pa.
SrfJ.M.HlLSTEAD'S
Self-regulating
Jncubator!
' From f 20 up.
Send for rtooerlp
tive price lint, etc.
Thoroughbred
Poultry and Egx
Iflll U.naitnj.r
JOakland. ChL
I bava a positive remedy for tne above dlaeaae; by ite
aae thousands of cases of the worst kind and of ion
tandlne bave been cored. Indeed, so strong Is my fal
or i
L
sen
In Its emcacy, that I will send TWO HOTT'.ES FKEK. to-
astt2cxer.
gwtbar with s VALUiBLa TllBaTIHH en tMe rtU.aio.tO
r. Wv Kxprose and P. O. addreaa.
VB, T. A. aXoCb Jf. Ill rearl itu. m.avTorkv
26tfth EDITION. PRICE ONLY $!
3Y MAIL POST-PAID.
KI.QW THYSELF.ZL?
A Great Medical Worfc on ManliooJ,
Exhausted Vitality, Nervous and Physical Debility.
Premature Decline In man, Krrors of Youth, and the un
told miseries resulting from indiscretions or exoeasea. A.
book for every man, young niidiile-afc-ed and old. It eon
tains 135 prescriptions for all acute and shronlc diseases,
each one of which Is invaluable. Ho found by the author,
whose experience for 23 years Is such as probably never
before fell to the lot of any physician. 3o0 pages, hound
in beautiful French muslin, embossed covers, full gilt,
guaranteed to he a finer work In every sense merbnnicai,
literary and professional than any other work sold in this
country for 2.50, or the money willde refunded In every
Instance. Price only l 00 by mail, post paid. Illustra
tive sample 6 cents. Bend now. Mold medal awarded
the author by tha National Medical Association, to the
officers of which be refers.
The book should be read by the youn for instruction,
and by the afflicted for relief. It wiU benefit all-London
Lancet.
There is no member of society to whom this book will
not be useful, whether youth, parent, guardian. Instructor
or slergyman. Tribune. , .
Address the IV a body Medical Institute, or Dr. w. TL
Parker, No. 4 Bullfinch street, Boston, Mass.. who may
be eousulted on all dines sos requiring skill and experi
ence. C'luronio and obstinate diseases tj r A that
have baffled the skill of all other physl- rt CMIaclsiu
a specialty. Buch treated success- a sj y C tT I tT
fully without an instance of failure. 1 --
N, B. Bend money by Registered Letter or P. O. Or
der. Books ean be sent to any address on the Pad ho
Coast as safely as at home. Concealed In substantial
wrappers heart in only the applicant's aiblreas
30 DAYS' TRIAL
(BFI-'mKl (aKT.li
P'LP.OTBO-VOLTAIC BELT and other J-i."rTr.M
li Ai-Pi.tAMCrs are sent on ) Days' Trial 1 0
MEN OXLY, YOUNQ OR OLD, who are sufTer.
Ing from Nfrvoi s Dkbu-ity. Lost Vitautt,
Wimta Wr AKKKSSEa. and all those dlsesses or n
Pkkmomal NATliag, resulting from Abism ana
Othek Caches. Bpeedy relief and complete
restoration to Health, Vntoit and Masiiood
oaaanterd. Bend at oace lor Illustrated
Pamphlet free. Address "
Voltaio Belt Co., Marshall, Mich,
ipCUTC ViAUTCn EVEKYWHKUK TO.
BF.Ll
HUa.il Id II CHILLI
the best Family Knitting Ma
chine ever Invented. Will kuit a ir of stocklm-s with
UK E Li and TOE complete in 20 minutes. It will also
kn"t a great variety of lancr work for which there la al- ,
fcas a ready market- Bend for circular and ternis to
the Twouibly Knitting Mar nine Co., lt!3 Tre
nont street. Boston Mass.
RUPTURE.
Absolutely eur-d In 0 to ft
diva, by Dr FU-mes Faiat
riuiin Trim.
r-VVarrana Uir onlyElectrloTruse
In the wtria. LmuciT.ni''
others. Perfect Retainer, ami l.wonj
-HKoaaaandcoiiifortnlchtaiKliuy. V?UT
and e MliSiN.- Illustrated pan.
. . . , , k ; .. ..... nf .w Yiirk.
Tm phlet frae.oont.int-.f
Mr5aUU
MdlMA
t-, STOMACH wad?
SITTTE
I i r
"onus
Old
Mir r?Ttivsr
mm