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About Polk County times. (Dallas, Or.) 1869-1??? | View Entire Issue (Jan. 15, 1870)
+* F IR E S ID E MISCEL LA ¿VF. THE BILLET-DOUX. BY A -------- C---- - . «•My previous one” — (Yes, yes, I know it, Your words and actions ever show it,) "Your letter I received with joy," (O f course you did, you foolish hoy !) "And read it o’er with fond delight. And dreamed shout it all the night. And kissed it sweetly. (That was right!) •*My thoughr* are ever, love, with you, Sweet previous one. (I know that's true!) " I long to see you so, rny dear; (Well, if you don’t ’twiHild be queer!) "And am so glad your health is bettor; Your writing proves it in your letter. It makes me happy just to know You're happy, darling. (Does it, though ?) "Walk out, my love, each pleasant day, Enjoy yourself in every way; (That's sensible, now, I must say) ■"Imjwove each grace to make you shine; The more you have, the more is mine— My heart’s dear pulse, its vital air. (Now that's just like him, I declare!) "You know my love is constant, true— J worship you, (Of course you do) ^And you, my darling, don’t forgot T o love me in return, sweet pet! 4 No, bless your heart! I never will, Hut every wish of yours fulfil) "A thousand kisses, love. I send; I know each one you will befriend. Writo goon, and every wish make known To me, your faithful one, your own. Tc< once again, good-bye, good-bye. Love me a little. (Yes, I’ll try) "Y our fond adorer, David Dye.” -i p Humorous Sayings and Doings. W E S T -S I D E S T O R E ! Y E W FIRM! MAIN STR E E T , EOLA. — Lord Palmerston was once appealed to on the suhjeot o f marriage with tho R . D O T Y , sister o f one’s deceased wife, and, iu re is h e s to in f o r m t h e p u b l ic ply, with his well known chuckle, he that he keeps constantly on hand a said :— ‘ I f a man who has married one, large assortment of and had th«* good fortune to bury his wife, is fool enough to marry again, by all mesus let him marry his deceased Specially adapted to the wants of the community, embracing wife’s sister; as then, at any rate, he will only be afflicted with one mother- Dry Goods, in-law.” W G E N E R A L M E R C H A N D IS E , — A doting mother o f a waggish boy, having bottled a lot o f nice preserves, labeled them, “ Put up by Mrs. D— Johnny, having discovered them, soon ate the contents o f one bottle, and wrote ou tho bottom o f the label, “ Put down by Johnny D — Groceries, < Queens ware, Hardware, Boots A Shoes, Hats & Caps, Etc., Etc., Etc. and judge for yourselves. — Stiggin8,^thc newly married man, says his wife is a perfect rose. The only drawback to his happiness is, that she blows out a “ leetlo” too ofteu. — A blushing damsel o f forty sum mers says : “ There is no difficulty in getting ‘e n g a g e d t h e trouble is to keep so.’ C. B. S T I L E S ’ IVew Store! A rue G e n e r o s it y . — Sometimes there is an element iu society consisting o f a morbid desire to behold the misfor tunes or degradation o f unfortunates. Some people keenly relish the spectacle of some poor creature whom fortune has dealt less kindly with than themselves. Instead o f being imbued with proper sympathy for such, the off spring of an exalted generous sentiment, they arc possessed of a spirit o f mis ch ief to destroy. Nothing exceeds their bravery in attacking those who are help, less, and unable to resent anything. Hut diametrically opposed to this uofeel ing spirit is another element which, al though less powerful than the other, is none the less mighty in intrinsic love, true manliness and worth. It is a no ble feeling, the brightest attribute in the mind of man ; a chivalrous impulse to raise and cheer. Possessed of a last ing beauty, it will never fade, nor loose a single beam o f its surpassing bright ness. When eternity snaps asunder the bands of time, this pure and holy spirit will rise above all thought, like the sweet incense of a thousand immor tal flowers, cmbalmiug with softest fra grance the memory of its noblest deeds. W hich is the more beautiful, a morbid spirit to oppress, or true generosity for the feelings of others ? ffiaTThere was a strange and start- ling scene iu a Good Templars’ Lodge in Lexingtoa, K y., on Tuesday night, 10th ult. John W . Alexander, a young man, was about to be initiated, and as part o f the ceremony, was offered a glass o f water. He drew back with a shudder, and the recollection o f the fact that in August last he was severely bit ten by a dog, flushed with terrible in tensity across his mind. The next day he was out, bnt the memory hauuted him, and he said to a friend that he would go home and go to bed, and die. He went home and to bed, and in spite o f drugs and nursing, the horrible mal ady, hydrophobia, rushed rapidly to its conclusion in death. Wednesday after noon he went into his first spasm. Wednesday night he foamed at the jnotlih-and yelped like a dog, and his paroxysms continued and grew in inten sity. Strong men held him and power ful anaesthetics were administered. He begged to be shot, and prayed for death. Thursday, about 2 p. m . he died. — “ Mammy,” said a precocious little boy who, against his will, was made to rock the cradle o f his baby brother, “ I f the Lord has any more babies to give .away, don’ t you take ’em.” — A liftle five year old boy was be iie u n d e r s ig n e d h a s j u s t r e - ing instructed in morals by his mother, ceived and is now opening a carefully se She told him that all such terms as “ Hy lected stock of golly,’ ’ “ Hy jin go,” “ Hy thunder,” etc,, were only minced oaths, and but little Dry Goods, better than any other profanity. In Groceries, fact, she said, she eould tell a profane Boots & Shoes, oath by the prefix “ by” in all su(h oaths. “ W ell then mother,” said the Ladies9 Dress Goods, little hopeful, “ there’s a big oath in the Hen’s Clothing, newspaper— ‘ By telegraph.’ ” The old E TC., E TC., lady gave it up, and the boy is bewild Which ho proposes to sell as CHEAP as the ered on morals. T — An undertaker, who was briskly furbishing up a coffin, being asked who it was for, replied’ “ I can’ t tell which, hut two women have started out on a talking match next door, and it will he sure to end iu the death o f one of them !” — Many men who pretend to have grains o f common sense seem to have scruoles about using them. — Marriage— an altar on which a man lays his pocket hook, and a wo man her love letters. — Moving for a new trial— courting a second wife. — A story is told o f a jolly, good fellow, who resided in Chicago about four years, and while on an Eastern vi sit, was asked how he liked the water out West. “ By George, Mr. -------,” said he after a moment’s reflection, “ I never thought to try it.” — A young man wants a situation where the only heavy thing is the sal ary. He is willing to dispense with any amount of work i f this can be guaran teed. — In chemistry, the best way to se parate two bodies is to introduce a third. The same holds true in other departments. To increase the distance between a pair o f lovers, let little W il lie walk into the back parlor with a lighted candle in his hand. ° * — The tobacco chewer is said to be like a goose in a Dutch oven— always on a spit. —“ I am astonished my dear young lady at your sentiments ; you make me start.” “ W ell, sir, I ’ve been wanting you to start for the last half hour.” — The Major says that the only man not spoiled by being “ lioned” was the prophet Daniel, and that Adam was the only man that never tantalized his wife about the way his mother used to cook the dinner. — Eels are, it is now decided for cer tain, nothing hut water soakes, aud bring forth their young alive. I f they will only learn to skin each other they will resemble human beings in more than one respect. samo quality of goods can be procured this side of Portland. Call ancl See Me, FOUNDERS, STEAM ENGINE 1 1 . C. BROWN & CO, Briek Store, Main street, opposite the Court Houae, Dallas, Ogn. AND B O IL E R B U IL D E R S . T h ese w o r k s a r e l o c a t e d on t h e E L M B O L D ’ S E X T R A C T BUCHU bank of the river, one block north of gives health and vigor to the frame, and E HAVE JUST RECEIVED THE Coach’s Wharf, and have facilities tor turning bloom to the pallid cheek. Debility is accom Largest and most Complete stock of oqt machinery promptly and efficiently. panied by many alarming symptoms, and if no We have secured the services of Mr. John treatment is submitted to, consumption, insan Nation, as Director of the Works, whose expe ity or epeleptio fits ensue. rience on this Coast for sixteen years gives him Ever brought into Polk county, including a thorough knowledge of the various kinds o f Spring and Summer goods o f the Latest Styles, machinery required for mining and milling which we are determined to sell as Cheap, or purposes. Cheaper than those o f less inducement. We are prepared to execute orders for all classes o f Machinery and Boiler Work, such as We have a very fine assortment of W H GENERAL MERCHANDISE L A D IE S ' TRIM M ED H ATS! Cost and Freight. CLOTHING and H A R D W A R E , Wheeler A Randall’s Patent Grinder and GROCERIES and CROCKERY. Amalgamator. OR NON-RETENTION, OR IN CON TI NENCE o f Urine, irritation, inflamation or ulceration o f the bladder or kidneys, diseases o f the prostrate glands, stone In the bladder calculus gravel or brickdust deposits, and al. the diseases o f the bladder, kidneys and drop sical swellings USE HELMBOLD’ S FLUID E X T R A C T BUCHU. F All ot which w# w ill exchange for Dunbar’s Self-adjusting Patent Piston Packing Stevens’ “ “ “ “ W ool, Wheat, Bacon,>Butter, Eggs, Either applied to old or new steam cylinders. Flaxseed or washed Cotton Rags, Quartz Stampers, Shoes and Dies, Call and boo u s . Y ou will always find us happy to seo you, happier when we show you eur goods, and happiest when we sell to you. W C. BROW N A CO. Dallas, Polk county, April 30, 1869. 1 FARMERS’ STORE! Of the best hard iron. 1 AITERS. — DO YOU WANT SOME Fine Cloth Gaiters? if so. supply your selves at J. H. LE W IS’S. G MORE T H A N NFEBLED AND DELICATE CONSTI TUTIONS o f both sexes, use Helmbold’s Extract Ruchu. It will give brisk and ener getic feeling, and enable you to sleep well. E 200,000 P E R S O N S Bear testimony to the Wonderful Curative Effects of ®, q ©* c Money Saved ! Dr. J>**enh WHk^r’s IMPORTANT TO EVERYBODY 1 |1HE LARGEST AND BEST STOCK r p A K E NO MORE U N PLEA SAN T OR I unsafe remedies for unpleasant and dan gerous diseases Use Helmbold s Extract Bu* rhu and Improved Rose Wash. OF Dry Gooils, Clothing, * ’S J3 •- ; Boots, Shoe*, Groceries, and Crockery. Z- * , X 0* That has ever been offered in Polk Co., is just reoeived at CRONE A W OLF’S New two story building at INDEPENDENCE, which we will sell CHEAPER than the CHEAP EST. We are prepared through recent arrange ments made in San Francisco, to find constant sale for all kinds of Produce, and paying the highest murket price for WHEAT. We also have in connection with our store, A LARG E W AREH OUSE, œ « w © js i PS w -S CALIFORNIA fl% r i l H E GLO» Y OF MAN IS STR EN G TH . I Thereforc^the nervous and debilitated should immediately use Helmbold s Extrhct iiuchu. " s | VINEGAR BITTERS Manufactured from the native Herbs and Roots ol Calitornia, The Great Rlood Purifier where we offer storage on good terms. We alse keep FOR INFLAMM ATORY AND CHRON Dou’ t Forget the Chlckamln. IC RHEUMATISM AND GOUT. DYSPEP MOLINE u<l BOSTON CLIPPE R SI A or INDIGESTION. BILIOUS, R E M IT 4 PLOW S. TENT and IN TERM ITTEN T FEVERS, DISEASES OF THE BLOOD, LIVER. K IDN EYS and BLADDER, these BITTERS Save been most succeysful. SUCH DISE.4S ES are caused by V ITIA T E D BLOOD, which is generally produced hy derangement o f the D IG ESTIVE ORGANS. E M I N E N T Clearse the Vitiated Blood whenever you find its impurities bursting through the skin in Pimples, Eruptions, or oores; cleanse it when you find it obstructed and sluggish in the Being naratives of the Lives and Deeds of tho most prominent women o f the present gen veins ; cleanse it when it is foul, and your feel eration. Among whom are FLORENCE ings will tell you when. Keep the blood heal thy, and all will be well. N IGHTIN GALE, n AGENTS, ANNA E. DICKINSON. ROSA BON 11 EUR, r c o n a ld a FRANCES ANNE KEMBLE, Importing Wholesale L ID IA II. SIGOURNEY, h e u n d e r s ig n e d , h a v in g pur - G AIL HAMILTON, chased the exclusive right from Wm. Ma and over 40 others, hy the most prominent au Comer Pine and Sansome Streets, San Fran son, for the District comprising the counties o f thors o f our day and time. cisco, Cal., and Sacramento, Cal., and POLK and MARION, is manufacturing these It is an elegant octavo volume, beautifully 34 Platt sfreet, N. Y. Celebrated Plows, and is ready to fill orders for illustrated with numerous finely executed steel 8 -ly the same on short notice. engravings and containing nearly 700 pages. As a literary production, it contains the best Come, Farmers, and encourage essays and finest thoughts of many o f the most Webfoot Ingenuity & Enterprise ! prominent writers of the present day. This is the best work ever offered to canvass And enable yoursolvcs to raise Large Crops. ers, and those wishing territory assigned them SENT BY EXPRESS, CASH ON DELIVERY. For Sale at my Shop at flOO each. to canvass should apply immediately in person T U B GEN U IN E or hy letter to the undersigned. We also have the General Agency for the Pa cific Coast for “ Greeley’s American Conflict,” A Dixie, Polk county, Ogn. and are ready to supply through our agents all who desire it. MPROVED AN D MANUFACTURED BY Having also tho sole agency for Morse's Cel ns are all the beet make, Hvwling eemet, obrated Fountain Pens, we are prepared to fur finely chased and beautifully enamelled, Patent nish canvassers with a aapital article. and Detached Lerer». fu ll jeweled, and every perfectly regulated and adjusted, and H. H. BANCROFT & CO., watch Guaranteed by the Company in keep cor Publishers, STATE STR E E T , SALE M , OREGON, rect time, and wear and not tarni*h, but retain 609 Montgomery St., an appearance equal to solid gold as long as 23 San F r a n c is c o , C a lifo r n ia Importer, Wholesale and Reetail Dealer in worn. These celebrated watches we are now send ing out by mail and express, C. 0. D., a n y / where within the United States and Canadift, Northwest Corner Main and Mill Sts., at the regular wholesale price, payable on de livery. ANHOOD AND YOUTHFUL V IG O R arc regained by lielmbold’ a Extract Bu- J. H. LEW IS. i_______CRONE & WOLF. PREMIUM A SPLENDID BOOK FOR AGENTS! GANG ___ PLOWS ! WOMEN OF THE AGE! THE BEST KNOWN TO MAN! MASON’S GANG s BATTERED CONSTITUTION RESTOR ED by Helmbold’» Extract Buchu. PLOW . ii. M D CHALLENGE.” c©., DRUGGISTS, T $15 BUY THF BEST $15 T. II. LUCAS, (g A ll kinds of School Books used in this vicin. ity constantly on bund. AGENT FOR V A 8 0 N ft HAM LIN'S ORGANS, As I import all my stock direct from manu facturers and Publishers, I can offer superior inducements to publishers. i i r H a l f a block east o f the Bank-W^. _____________ 21-tf____________________ DRUG STORE. D A L LA S, OGN. the o l d s t a n d formerly belonging to W. S. Robb, and wishing to live and let live, I will sell at low rates, ¿’ OR CASH, everything in my line: a v in g H purchased Drugs, Patent Medicines, And all kinds o f PURE LIQUORS, put up expressly for Medicinal use. P E R F U M E R IE S OF ALL K IN D S , Also, Soda, Cream TarUir, Seder at us, Sago, Bird Seed, Paints, Ods, Cor. Malu aud Court Streets, Varnishes, Brushes, Domestic Dyes, Thos. G. Richmond, Proprietor. Washing Powders H Buggies, single or double. Hacks, Con cord Wagons, etc., etc., Furnished at all hours, day or night, on short notice. prefer that all should receive and see the goods before paying for them. A Single M atch to any Address, 115. A CLUB OF S IX , with an extra watch to the agent sending the club, $90, making seven watches for $90. Also, a superb lot o f most elegant Oroide Chains, of the lutest and most costly styles and patterns, for Ladies’ and Gentlemen’s wear, from ten to forty inches in 'engtb, at prices of $2, $4, $6 and $8 each ; sent when ordered with Watch at the regular wholesale prices. Describe the watch required, whether Ladies’ or Gentlemen’s size, and address your orders and letters to T H E OROIDE W ATCH CO., 13-8t B . F . N I C H O L S , Druggist. N is hereby g iv e n to a l l persons not to harbor or in any way credit Elizabeth Adaline Bailey, as I will not be res ponsible for any debts she may contract. GEORGE BAILEY, of Lane Co, Dallas. Polk Co.. Nov. 4. 186». 27 S ALT.— CARMEN ISLAN D AND L ÏV ERPOOL Salt, in quantities to suit,.«* COX ft E A R H A R r S S a jo ». HOTEL, No«. 102, 104, 106 Front «treet, cor Alder, Is a certain cure for diseaaea o f th# D D E R KIDNEYS, GRAVEL, D RO PSY» ORGANIC WEAKNESS, FE M A LE COMPLAINTS, GEN ERAL D E B ILITY . U R IN A R Y ORGANS, Whether existing in MALE OR FEMALE, From whatever come originating, and no matter o f HOW LONG STANDING. Diseases o f t h e » organa require the nse o f » diuretic. I f no treatment is submitted to, Con sumption or insanity may ensue. 0 « r flu b and blood are supported from these sources, and the HEALTH AND HAPPINESS, and that o f Posterity, depend u|»n prompt use ol a reliable remedy. HELMBOLD’S E X TR A C T BUCHU, Established upwards o f 18 years, prepared b j H. T. HELMBOLD. D ruygiti, No 694 Brosdway New York, No.’ fo4 South Tenth sL, Philadelphia, P # n o . PORTLAND, OREGON, THOMAS R YA N , w - PR O PRIETO R. (Formerly of the What Cheer House.) To Whom 1 May Goncern. o tic e 1 4 8 F ulton street, N ew Y ork . MECHANICS’ And everything else that is kept in a FIR ST CLASS DRUG STORE. 1 HELMBOLD’S FLU ID EXTRACT BUCHU No money Is required In advance, as we And all the diseases o f the DALLAS LIVERY. FEED A SALE AVING PURCHASED THE ABOVE Stand o f Mr. A. H. Whitley, we have re fitted and re-stocked it in Buch a manner as will satisfactorily meet every want of the com munity. H I J. K. GILL, School Books. Blank Books, Stationery and Musical Instruments. ELMBOLD’S EXTRACT BUCHU A N D improved Rose Wash cure secret and del icate disorders, in all their stages, at little e x pense, little or no change in diet, no inconven ience and no exposure. It is pleasant in taste and odor, immediate (o its action and free from all injurious propertie O roide G old W a tc h e s! BOOKS & STATIONERY — Illegal husbandry— thrashing a Superior Saddle Horses, let by the Day or Week* wife. — The artist who took a lady, Re TERMS, REASONABLE. turned her the same day. * 4 T. a. RICHMOND ■ i& b '- IRON A T THE OLD HEADQUARTERS OF mew Goods! S T EP IN! T H PORTLAN D , OGN. H EADQUARTERS! I — During the cross-examination o f a witness he was asked where his father was. To which question, with a mel ancholy air he responded : “ Dead, sir — dropped off v e r y suddenly, s ir.” “ How came he to drop off suddenly ?” was the next question. “ Foul play, sir — the sheriff imposed on his unsuspic ious nature, and getting him to go on a platform to look at a select audience, suddenly knocked a small trap-door out from under him, aud in falling he got entangled in a rope, from the effects of which he expired.” H EW STYLES! AND REDUCED PRICES ELMBOLD’ S F LU ID EXTRACT BU - CHÜ is pleasant in taete and odor, free, from all injurious properties, aud in its action. NORTH FRONT AND E STREETS, To which we invite the attention o f the Ladies. MINING AND 8TEAMB0AT MACHINERY Also, to our full stock o f DRESS GOODS, con SAW aud FLOURING M ILLS. sisting of Silks, Irish and French Poplins, French Merinos, all-wool Empress and half and all wool Deluines; and especially to our com QUARTZ MILLS, M INING PUMPS, Main street. Opposite Court House, plete assortment of Biass Buttons, Fringes, Ao>, Ac., Ac. Gimps and Velvets o f all colors, our Ginghams, Manufacture and Repair Machinery o f all Lawns, Cambrics, Swisses, etc., etc., in great kinds. variety. — •— We call the attention o f GENTS and HEADS AM NOW PREPARED TO OFFER A Irou Shutter W ork at San Francisco OF FAM ILIES to our fine assortment of large assortment o f choice — An Irish lover remarked that it is a great comfort to be aloue, “ ospeoially whin yer swatehart is wid ye.” — “ You ought to acquire the faculty PROVISIONS, Now isn’t he a saucy chap? o f being at home iu the best society,” GROCERIES, I'd like to give him such a rap— said a fashionable auut to an honest A* spirits give, I mean. Oh, dear! WOODEN WARE, 1 wish the darling soul was here. nephew. “ I manage that easily enough, TOBACCO, FRUITS, madam,” responded the nephew, “ by CIGARS I ’ m a W o m a n , D o n ’ t y o u S kk m y staying at home with my wife aud child- tf YANKEE NOTIONS, Etc., Etc. H a i r ?— Not lon<{ since a party was ren. Also, a General Assortment of given near Hannibal, when a mischiev — Ladies are like watches— pretty BOOTS, SHOES AND GAITERS. ous young woman thought to enjoy the enough to look at— sweet faces and de- fun to be derived from passing herself licate hands, hut somewhat difficult to I design to keep only the CHOICEST and for a young man just arrived from a “ regulate” after they are a-going. BEST articles and sell them at a Small Profit strange locality. Hut tho mala portion For Cash. — “ Prisoner, you are oharged with o f tho party penetrated the disguise, MV MOTTO.—.Quick sales aud small and immediately set their wits to work begging in the public street on Sunday, profits. G . B. S T I L E S . to have a little sport over the affair. on tho pretense that you were suffering from a grevious wound.” “ W eli, it is It seems that horses had been stolen in B Y OVERLAND ROUTE the nc'glihorhood, and they caused the all true.” “ Why did you not show ______ s report to be whispered about, takinggood your wound to tho police, then, when they asked to see it ?” “ I could not, care the disguised women should hear it. Finally the report that the thief your honor. M y wound is closod on was probably in the room, went the Sunday.” rounds, the youug lady was pointed out and tho yell was set up, ‘ ’ there he is now.’ ’ Revolvers were drawu in an instant, and tho lady, presuming they were really serious, and not wishing to ho exposed in company, also fearing they would shoot her unceremoniously, sprang out of the room and ran furious ly for home. Tho pistols were fired in the air, and the fugitive presuming the next shot might he fatal, pulled off her cap, let down her hair, aud screamed at every jum p, ‘ ‘ I ’m a women, dont’ t you see my hair?” The boys were so exci ted by laughter that they could neither shout nor longer run. They halted, hut the disguised female continued to run, screaming at the top o f her voice, ‘ •I’m a women, dont’t you see my hair ?” Willamette Iron Works Company N EW GOODS! H AVIN G OPENED THE ABOVE HOUSE, the proprietor wishes to announce to the public that he is now prepared to accommodate guests in a satisfactory manner at the most Price, $1 25 per bottls, or six bottls« for $6 6* reasonable rates. , . . delivered to any address. The entire house has been newly finished and furnished throughout in the most complete SOLD BY DRUGGISTS EVERYWHXR1 and oomfoatable manner. 5-iy Baggage token to and from the house free of bar®». ' 19