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About Polk County times. (Dallas, Or.) 1869-1??? | View Entire Issue (May 8, 1869)
!**7xn ay*-*! » xwtrmaa — — — — — i — father continued <: eves of »be Jw*misoin< iy. ‘ But. Uyutl.itii, ¿ 0 1 must, be weary; I Whenever I see a yppng person vol untarily render respect tp the aged, I cuum/t ¿iA 'C C pt it."' » + « > 1 O SPHIM . ¿h e uintle an impatient gesture. uni constrain^ to admire him or ficr, 8#tflnf, youre eum at last, hev you ? Miss W imlicster was accustomed always ps a relic o t'ib e good old politeness Ji* j o * ! it* yonv l>in a sitiin in Old Winter's t’j liave her own w >y. .fhich reigued’.Qvei show and heartless- *x*>—^ jw aintyua *?h«uiel of yourwll ? ••No. sir; 1 am well, young and ¿ess when I was a lad. It is all hollow i sr is* the old teller's bin a bu*«iu of you, . - qou M think he bad fr<>ui your breath -troiig; I should be ashamed to>it while oereuiouy now, my dear ; and if the A being so cold— but tba s the way them a mad o f your age »mi health remained old man cannot stand without assistance, Old tellers have a duiug. he is thrown down and trodden vpnn. standing/’ * Well, a* I wee saying, Thank you! Your kindness is well But there is a march, or my ears de Youv cum at la$» with y o - ‘‘ barny timed and nut thrown away, l venture ceive m e; Alfred, d»you need a further Preth" a blowing from tb« Northwef—* ' to tell you. I shall accept your uftor hint, or must -jour ihtutuatic uld lather W (»constant or Nebraska, I *pu»e, Great kuntrie* f»x bam 1 rcken. set you an example of courtesy ?” with gr.»tiiud<‘.” So saving, the old gentleman sank The y.mng man stared and colured, Xow jquv <,ijn wen for he had b- eu guzii g so intently on iijtg the vacant scat, with a well satis Every boili’s Kortj and things H jv all been fed o a t! Novj .oek at fied expression ot countenance ; but the rare beauty o f Miss Winchester, Our Kritter* will ya ? See our Kattie Fiiz James expressed his unbounded that he had forgotten time and place. On the lit). a bavvjn to be j,tuddid by «•onteuipt for his neighb -r by drawing “ It M iss Winchester will permit me,’ ’ TUur tnl^a when they gets op a mornings 1 his ample raghiu closely around him. he said, offering his arm ; and in a mo U k *t ,« r bo«sU, wata all c«jaced T,- Skeletons a weapin over a trolt; aud shrinking nearer to Hi* side o f the meut after they were lost in a throng A bull trolt ful or kobs! ear. The stranger looked ¿R him with of prouicnyders. A hull troft ful of bitter reckoleck*hun*! Mr- Sutherton seamed bent on show quiet scorn. Luk at them shepe a lien in - Y u need not trouble yourself to ing his gratitude to the lady for the The fence corners a w.itin sum ov— slip through the window, young mao,” kindness she hud rendered his father, Y »s! they re bin a w.itin sum or for he scarcely quitted her side durinir said he in a voice of irony. Them, weex ! And it they wasn't Hul l theyd a bin “ .-h ikin their l«'x” Fitz James was thoroughly disgusted; Hie evening; and at the end o f th** At Jre and sed— U dun it ! (That thur he could not endure sucli vulgar associ week he followed her to Nafianr, w here Is from Hamlet won «<v ghuk-purs'* pfais) ation. So he arose quickly, aud striding he continued for two months* the yeten Another poit, s z -Grass differed uiakvj T^o stotnak ake. S*«vtl e.»v shepe wi,l over his companion, made his wuy iuio ois of Fitz James, and the enemy of Never open thur it onto grass agiu— No. ail the fops who aspired to the hand the smoking c ir. and fortune of the beautiful Miss Wiu- Mis* Winchester's sacrifice had b-en Now luk at them hogs as has bin A folleriu them Kaiel wat bur bin witnessed by all in th*j carriage, and a cheater. Stutet with ha ! See eut. will ye, a creepio Fitz James Eustace had long been dozen seats were offered her tty a dozen lionnd as it tbeys fetched with Corns, polite and otticiou* young gentlemen, his cou-iin’s suitor, and it was with ill Luk at tbqr eres will ye—oigger than 3 oy eabbiege M e ! Dur she declined them all by a motion conceal- d chagrin that he now saw him .#1 the head, and s'ood leaning against self thrown into the shuile by the sou See the shotes o f that “ wretched specimen,” who the side ot the vehicle. A leuin onter ttie fens to »quele! Luk at them mitv eres a “ hangin pend j : t ” The train fh-w onward— the old L'cn- ougJ)t to have found t place out o f all Outosi-h lipel hogs! See a hundred tlem in meanwhile disposing himself for decent people’s company. Gud sboyts reduced down to a even a ..... fort ible nap, which he wu$ shortly Karh in the New Year there was a K'>rn huskU fu l! Ye-, that thyrs ol rer d*in, U marriage ceremony performed in the e jovin j. Tardi. loiterin Spring—a hanging bak Sometime before midnight the lights old South Ghurch. and Alfred Suther As yu uv been a duin. o f Boston gleamed through the dark, ton was the groom and Isabel Winches, An elegant, house on n o s ; another moment, and the train ter the bride But now your cuqn Wo feel ver cheering presenz when wo Deacon street received the young couple, thundered into the depot. G it round -into the s rnth side ov the barn. Our old gentleman arose, shook him for Alfred is engaged in business in We her the hens a kaklin when thuyve s It. grasped his valise, and came over Boston, and every year the hale old Laid a e g ! W e see the borsradv-b A -»tartiii up a long side the gardiug General comes down from his house in to th<* side of Miss Winchester. Fens ! The women is a lukin irtto N ------ to visit his children. “ Madam” he said, “ you have made Tbe old teapots after garden sejes ! So you see that pnliicQess gained a And all these things make me tLiuk youv cum ! an old and feeble man’s journey tolera- b e ; will you u-»t tell bun your name hu-band for otie woman, and it will Ef so be iy« riled bring happiness to all if they will but •lid place o f abode?” Ye, Spring, sh >win up ov yer short cumins, practice it ; for true politeness springs She smiled-, waived all thanks, and J' st set it down as a poits lisens, (Tbo I haiut taken wun yet, 1 low to.] gave him her caid. He bowed and from the heart, and is theefferve-cence •either, just as Fuz James appeared o f a kindly. Christian spirit, anxious to escort her from the car*; but, to promote the wtdl being o f those with AN INCIDENT OF TRAVEL* getting through ttie pmwd was no easy whom it comes in contact. A STORY FoR l'UE TIMES. m atter, for the fuss and bustle were ungual, and Isabel noticed that several A STRANGE CASE. “ All full sir! but I pue 8 you’ ll man- j uniformed companies filled the space iu aue to 8 and tor tlio next fifty A number ot our city physicians front o f the depot. Mr. until, thespi uce young conduct Cries of “ Hurrah for General Suth went out to fJurlinatou ye-ferday, to pv on the Central iluiiway cars u her- 9 ♦ 9 investigate the case o f a child, which, ed in a decrepid. shabbily at tired o.d erton . “ Three cheers for the hero o f M ex for twenty days ha- been in u tra ic*» ni 'ii, who leaned wearily on his .-tafl. I he case is pronounced one of the most and earned a heavy yul so in one hand. i c o ! ” rent th«- a ir; banners wen trailed rem.nkable that ever came under the The lung, dimly lighted car was full; out on the fre^h night breeze; flambeaux notice ot *he medic d faculty, and there every seat was occupied; band boxes flashed, drums beat, aud a long line of is little wonder that, it creates something carriages filed up the street. and cari et baps were held in their owq In the renort of the Fitz James inquired the occasion of o f a sensation er's laps, and there was not a s'liglc affair puhliofied in the I F scmisln o f all this tumult, and learned that it was phan-e tor ;he Dew cuiner to be accom • had not suffi dent details a public welcome extended by the citi yesterday, jnodated. to • jopluin the case thoroughly but are zens of Bostpn to General ¿utberton a A cuUfle o f score o f faces lifted enabled to do so to day from the lips of gentleman and veteran officer, who hid themselves to glance at the old man’s distinguished1 himself iu the late M exi persons who have seen the child. face, as he moved slowly and painfully A little daughter. 12 years of age. down the narrow aisle. It was pain can war. “ He came in this train,” said a by* named Mina, o f Christian Rausi-h. a fu ly evident that he had as much a* he s’ ander. “ Is it possible, sir. tha* you German farmer, living about one and a could d<* to support himself, and he half miles from Burlington, Racine sides he looked like one that was just did not discover him ?— a sickly look* couufy, in this State, had a severe at recovering f'oiu a severe illness— hi.« im* old m n. dressed in threadbare gray tack of measles and dipthcria. She mid carrying a large black valise— lie cheek was thin and pale, and his eye.« had nearly recovered from these on the lias just recovered from » severe attack lacked the fire which ought to -p u k le ot rheumatic fever, which bus troubled Nth day of January when she called beneath thosi large and strongly mark h in ever since his last campaign her father to her bedside and told him ed I rows. '1 hose vile Mexican night vapors, and that she was going to sleep for a long, There were man* well, active looking, sleeping on the cold ground, undermined long time. Flic said she would look as hea thy young men in the ear, hut none his constitution, but he is a fine old lei though she was dead, and she made ot the number felt disposed to renoun»-»- her father promise her that he would his soft, comfortable >eat to the shabby low yet.” Miss Winchester thought lie must be ; not bury her, whitffi promise it may old traveler. And after a stare ot un readily he -upposed has been faithfully disguised contempt, each and all drop, she bail h ard much ol his gallant dar kept. Soon after making the re ped their eyes and thou-ht no more ol • ng, but l’ itz Janos was the picture ot quest the child to all appearances quietly s h nt mort fit atmn. the suff ring obi age before them. Miss Winchester and her cousin and peaceiully sink into her last sleep. In this enlightened century, it is » By all it was supposed that Mina wa* notorious fact thu* tl.e aged meet with stopped at the American House, and dead, and the body was enshrouded and early tbe next morning, before the lady slights and incivilities, to say nothin- placed in a coffin. After the sleep the of positive unkindness, which would ha l fini'hed dressing, a servant brought body showed no signs of death, talttmo-.-h •ip a note bearing her address. have | ut the barbarous nations of old Is be* tore it open, and here iV!l our the pulse and the heart ceased to per to shame. two lards o f invitation to a twill to be f.-rm their pulsaui-tns, and no device Fitz James Eustace, a young rxqnis con’d -how that the respiratory organs ite, who was escorting his cousin. Isabel held nt the B «Vrre ‘ h“ 1 evening, in were in use. The eyes closed. honor o f G«‘ A Sutherton. W i ichester, to Nahant, drew down In this state Minn has lain now fiir One card bore the name of F in his mouth until the ends of his copper twenty days without, a sign o f life and Janies the other was directed to her e< 1 »r**d moustache rested upon the tip.» with no sign o f death other than a o f his well starched dickey and re self She had no acquaintances in Bos 3 inking o f the cheeks and eyes which ton, consequently the invitation must marked to the l«dy by his side.— ■ ave been sent at the iustaucc o f Geu would be natural with one who had fust “ Really. Mr. Smith is insulting us! ed for so long a period W hy cannot he find a place tor th it Sutherton himself Three Havs ago a vein was tapped Fuz Japes was surprised • nd humil* specimen in the second da s c a r ? ” •vnd blood flow ed as naturally as if would iated at this tnaik o f distinction, for he A flush, perhu| 8 of pride, perh ips of couid realize that the in\itati n had •n a living person. A blister raised on anger, mount d to the white forehead i eeti extended to him solely to save his fh«- flash precisely as it would on a liv o f Miss Winchester She put up her cousin’s feelings. But. norwithstand ing person. A neighbor o f Mr Rausch hand** though to ch ck the speaker, n j this, he wished to acc-'pt it. it only told our reporter that he pressed a finger and said in a subdued vo'C»*.— to h ive ap opportunity o f excusing his upon the hand ot the girl. Her fb-*h “ Fitz James w:ll you give Uat gen yes'erday’s impoliteness to the great wasso'id and upon taking away the tleman your seat * finger th«* spot was white. In a few “ My dear Isabel! Why I wou'd not man. The jrurney to Nahanf was deferred seconds the color came again, precise'y evacuate my place by vour side for :• us it would if the flesh ot a living per kingdom! Let thr o d fellow stand i' for one d >y ; and carU that evening the son were pressed in the same manner. out! It won’t change his appearance. .-ouuns W» re a» the Revere, where » Under these ciicun-stutices it is rea be lli mt coterie had al eady assembled. I’ ll be bound.” G eo. Sutherton, recbniDg on an arm sonable for the parents and friends to “ Then I wjll trouble you to rise a believe that the child lies in a trance, moment. I prefer the other side o f the chair ut the head o f the great drawing and there is little wonder that the case seat; allow me to pass, if yon please.” ro >m. receiving his friends asthey pass is attracting so much attentjpn among Fitz James never thought o f disput ed by. one giving place to another; but npedical men. It will be watched caret iog the will of his imperious cousin when Isabel was presented, he detained fully to the end, and with interest. A and he stood up to let her go our. But her hand to eav : “ Piea-e sit do^o on this ottoman at large number of persons have visited instead o f taking the 8> at which her es the house of Mr. Rau-ch, and nil e x cort had ied, the lady walked mv side; 1 have a relative here to press themselves as lost in wonder and straight on until she had the whom I wish to present you.” It was not long before a singularly amazement at this strikingly strange side o f the neglected old gentleman. affair .— Evening Wisconsin, Jan. 27. The touch o f her hand on his arm handsome young man came up to the General, smiling a friendly welcome, drew hi« attention towards her. A n nmorou-> swain declares that he Sir, will you have the goodness to and the veteran, turning to Isabel, said : has rubbed the skin from his nose by “ Miss W incf e*tcr, al'ow me to pre take the seat which I have vacated ? 1 have ridden since early ihi* morning sent to you tny son. Alfred Sutherton, ki.-sing her shadow on the wall. A and am really wearied* with sitting so who is ver\ grateful for the kindne-s hope'ess case that. which you last cveLing bestowed upon lo n r ; p 'a v o b ’ igo me ” “ W ell , wife, you can’ t say I ever The old man’s fo-e brightened, and , his father.” contracted bad habits.” “ N o, sir; he cast a grateful leak into the dark I T oe young man bowed, and then his you generally expanded them.” FIRESIDE MISCEI&AW occm reached COUNTRY HONKS. A correspondent o f the Willamette /Farmer uses the following language on ,th.e subject o f embellishing country homes: How often do W c poor, cooped up town people think what pleasant homes we woulii have i f we lived in the country! What grassy lawns, and shady wa:ks, apd fragrant flower beds t. But we would-doubtless learn the.t all these things r- quire labor. We would find many pUusibie excuses for that lack of taste which now seems so up pureut when we visit the homes o f our couutry friends. But while we cannot feel that they are without excuse in these things, we do feel that they might be greatly remediid. Sometimes, in our country rides, we pass a farm house that seems surrounded with uu atmos phere ol taste aud beauty. And it is not always the most expensive one Very often it is one ol the most hum h’e. But the fences are neat, the gates are properly hung, the shade trees are trimmed, and there is p row o f flowers on each side o f the walk. Wherever we look, we see the trace* o f effort at embellishment. And we know spuie thin-; of the inmates o f such a heme 'hough we have not seen one o f them. W hen we enter that house, we expect to find neatness, intelligence, good umn tiers and hospitality. And, I repeat, it is not necessary to be wealthy in or der to have these things. The rough est walls may then be made tasteful with simple ornaments. The humblest cottage may be surrounded with beauty. Even the t-imple wood-cuts in Harper's Weekly may be put in rustic fi antes and hung on the walls with good effect. Even tl e wild flowers o f our own woods, the honeysuckle, ocean spray, wild cur- rant, and scores o f othors, may be so planted and trained as to convert the humblest door-yard into a nd nature Eden. And though Eden’s perfect innocence may uot be theie, the chiL dreo who grow to manhood and woman hood in a home where the tasteful and beautiful are thus cultivated, will be quite sure to adorn their hearts with all good graces, and struggle for an in heritance in the Eden above. T h e W i f e — It is a-tonisliing to see how weil a man may live on a small income who Las a handy and iudu.striou> wifp. Some men live arid make a far better appearance on six or eight dollars a week than others on six*een or eigh teen dollar*. The man does his part wel*, but Ins wife is good for nothing She will even upbraid her Husband for not liviijg in as good style as his neigh bor, while the f h ult is entirely her own His neighbor bus a neat, capable, upd industrious wife and that makes »he difference His wife, on the other hand, is a whirlpool into which a great many silver cups might be thrown, and the iippearance of the water would not be changed. No Nicholas, the diver, ix there to restore the treasure. It is only an insult for such a woman to talk to her husband about her love and de votion. A Western paper has the following advertisement: *• Wants a situation, a practical printer, who is competent to take charge o f any department in a printing and publishing house. Would accept a professorship in- any of the academies. Has no objection to teach ornamental painting and penmanship, geometry, trigomnnctiy, and many other *ci< lie» 8 Is particularly suited to a c as a pustor to u small Evangelical church or as a local preacher. He would have no objection- to form a small 1 ut select class o f interesting young ladies to in struct in the higher branches. To a den'ist, or chiropodist he wnuld he in vn unhle. ns he can do almost anything Would board with afam ily.it decidedly pious. For further particulars, inquire o f Col Buffalo, at Brown’s saloon.” 8. k l f R e s p e c t and Self-Dependence Be and continue poor, young man, whila others around you grow rich by fraud and dishonor; be without place or power while others beg their way upwards ; bear the pain o f disappointed hopes while others gain theirs hy fla terv; forego the gracious pressure of the hand for which othera cringe and crawl. W rap yoiira<-lf in your own virtue, and *e«*k a friend and your daily bread. I f you hav**, in such a course grown gray with unblenched honor, bless God and die. Thpre are two emii-ent physicians in New York— one says lunch in the mid* die o f th*- day and the other says nav. An old doctor used to sny, “ eat wh<»n yoqare hungry, drink when you are dry, keep your feet warm, your head cool, lie straight, in bed and bid defiance to the physicians.” A Mr. Wust was recently parried in the city. The wife probably chose the Wust person in all her acquaintance for a hqsband. T he difference between a young lady and a night cap : One is born to wed and the other is worn to bad A ccording to the latest definition, a bachelor is a man who has lost the op. poriunity o f making a woman miserable. M ARRIED IN FUN BUT W E D D E D IN EAR NEaT* The Montpelier (V t 1.) Journal gays that, nqt a thousand miles fromaAVbite K L er Junction, s seifio couiio affair o c curred which made the parties to the Juke laugh out o f the other side o f their mouths. A correspondent, who des cribes the sffair, says: They have got up the funniest snarl across the river that you ever heard of. At a party last week. atone — :-----*s, after- exhausting the ordinary games, and wsoting something new, mock marriages were proposed. Accordingly names were drawn by lots, and four oouplesstood up to be married Ttie ceremony was performed, and they were duly pronounced man and wife, by the laws o f the State aud before i hese witnesses. Afterward they sscer- tained the pan officiating was a Justice o f the Peace, and the parties were le gaily married. They were in the great est alarm about it that ever was. One of them, Professor -----*----- o f T ------- Seminary, expects a lady up from below in about a fortnight to marry him, and nearly every one involved is expecting to he married right away; o> e other genrieman to a lady below, and they feel like death- They have sear. hed all the law bouls and consulted author, ities far and near, and everything only proves the knot still tighter. The Jus tice has been fined 850 for each couple. Hesays he is from another county aod cannot do business here, and supposed the marriage uot to be legal. It is cer tainlya funny scrape, and piade still funnier by the fact that all t)ie parties belong to the “ upper ten.” The beat opinion is that they arc legally married, and can only be divorced by the L c g b lature. F ish in g for M i c e — Several years since, writes a correspondent, my cousin. M iss---------- . used to keep a district school. Among those who attended it was a little boy of. perhaps, four years o f age, but too young to speak plain. One day, while the others were a* their studies, he got possession o f : pin and string. lie bent the pin int< the form ot a fish hook, tied the string to it, and put on it a small piece ot cheese. He had s< en a mouse come m through a hole in the corner ot tli hearth, and set him -elf to bob for i as though it had been a fish. He wa:- observed, and asked by the teachi > what he was doing. “ Fishing for a mouse,” was the re- A wot vooMn’a bean, jike should only hare one man i n f T The great queetio» of woa«ft4tfc*kfr rich ? “ How long did -Adffm T e m a »io Par* adise before he tinned'?” asked-a viaeu of her loving huabknd: “ Till he got his wife,” answered the husband calmly. A young man ra fted through the street* o f Toledo, Ditto, recently, foL lowed by a very excited German. The latter was shouting as h r ra n : “ Bo* lees, bolees. shtop der m an ; he iah going mit der reever, und der ieeundeo, for to suicide commits.” Several citi zens joined in the chase, and the fugi tive was captured just in time to pre vent him from leaping into the half frozen river. The Boston Post says: “ The fitness o f women for office will no longer be questioned. A postmistress in Penn sylvania has been caught robbing the mails.” A chap from the country, stopping at one o f the hotels, sat down to dinner. Upon-the bill o f fare being handed to him by the waiter, he remarked thafe he didn’t care “ b e o tr e a d in ” now— He’d wait till after dinner. An Illinois paper says that a flash o f lightning lately entered a school bouse in that State, and tore a pair o f boots from a boy’s feet aad hurled them at the head o f the master, to the great deligh' o f the unterrified “ Suckers.” The Quebec ASbrnmg Chronicle coma pletes one of its marriage announce ments with the following information: “ No cards! No ca k e ! ! No wine ! ! / ” A fellow, who has some “ music in ' his soul,” says that the moat cheerful and soothing o f all fireside melodies are the blended tones o f a cricket, s teakettle, a loving wife and a crowing baby, The wickedest man in Utiea is des cribed as tbe one who courted a young: lady eight years without proposing, and' -till lingers without coming tothe point — Had no prospect. John Allen is •»olipsed. Miss Tucker says it is with bachelors •s with old wood ; it is hard to get them -farted, hut when they do - take flame they burn piodigiou>ly. The inhabitants o f a noted fever aodl gue district in Illinois are said to turm iheir ‘ ‘ shakes” to s»*me account. They -limb into the top o f a “ shell bark” iust as the chill comes on, and' hy the ritue the “ personal earth quake” leaves hem, there is not a hickory nut lait •n the tree. As this pastime was not allowed it school hours the teacher, by way o punishment, ordered him to contiuu« bobbing for the mouse. So the little fellow sat, as grave as Judge, bobbing away, until soon tin mouse took a strong hold o f the ctiees« and the boy, giving a sudden pull Always cafch a lady when she faints,, spuing into the middle of the room out don’t rumple her hair, it makes her and swinging the mouse round hi- head, come to” befote she is fairly ready. astonished the whole school with tin “ Boh,” said a young fellow at a fancy exclamation : ‘ air, “ you are missing all the sights on •* I thwur. I've got ’ in»!” -his side.” “ Never mind, B ill,” re* 'I he gravity o f the school could no: be maintained by the sedate teacher fm ported Bob, “ I ’m sighting all the misses on the other.” some time. A lazy fellow.lying down on the grass, *aid: “ Oh, how l do wish this was A day’s journey was thirty-three and called work aud was well paid !” one fifth miles. What is that which ties two persons A Sabbath day’s journey was about • nd only, touches on e? A wedding- am English mile. * Ezekiel’s reed was eleven feet, nearly r5"g- A cubit is twenty*two inches, nearly A bluff oitl farmer says : “ I f a man A hand’s breadth is equal to three professes to serve the Lord, I like 1 0 see a-nd five eighth inches.. him doit when he measures onions, as A finger’s bredth is equal to one inch well as when he hollers glory hallelu*- A shekel o f silver was about fifty ycr.” cents Western papers call the strong.- A shekel o f gold was 88 00. minded women “ Knights o f the Gar« . A talent o f silver was 8538 32. ter.” A talent o f gold was 813,809. A pipce of silver, or n penny, was A country girl coming from the fields, thirteen cents. being told by her poetic cousin that she looked as fresh as a daisy kixsed with A gerah was one ceut. A mite was one cent. dew, said : “ W ell, it warn’ t any fellow • A homer contains 74 gallons aod five by that name, but it was Steve Jones pints. that kissed m e; I told him that every A nepha, or bath, contains seven gal me in the town would find, it out.” lons and five pints. “ Mother, I shouldn’t be surprised i f A bin vf;*« one gallon and two pints. our Susan gets choked some day.” A fir kip was seven pints. “ W hy. son ?” “ Because John W ispy An omer was six pints. twiaied his arms around her seek the A cab was three pints. oth**r night, aud if she had not kissed A log was one-hiUf pint. him to let her go, he would have straff« gled her.” E ven H anded J ustice . — A New “ My dear,” 9*id a cross-gr ined hus York paper contains the fallowing scrip, which carries with it a most valuable band to his long.8ufitring wife, “ do m oral: “ A man front the interior o f you intend to wake a fool o f m e?” Pennsylvania lost, his pocket book a day “ No, my d e a r; nature has saved me or two ago. A bystander saw the theft, the trouble.” but refused to describe the pickpocket. There are four gradpff/ oif students in In explanation o f his strange refosal, the New Y’ ork velocipede sehoel; the he asked the victim, “ W hy did you “ Timid Toddlers,” the “ Wary Wab- charge me ten cents for a drink o f wa blers,” the “ Go-it-GracefuI,” and the ter when I was in the army at Gettys “ Fancy Few.” burg ?” There was nothing more to The latest name for matrimony is be said after that. The moral of this “ committing twoioide. little story is this: Never refuse to do A baby is said to he like wheat, be* a good action whenevor an opportunity is offered; there^is no telling when you •ause it is first cradled, then thrashed, B»Ay need one, as in the instance nar and finally beeomes the flower o f the rated. family- . • D e f in it io n s of B ib l e T e r m s .— ‘‘ Time &t Un£tb sets all tbinrs «Ten, And if we do but mark the hour. There nerer je t was human power Which could evade, if unforgiven, The patient search and vigil long, Of him who treasures up a wrong.” Matrimony is hot buckwheat cakes, warm beds, comfortable slippers, smok ing coffee, round arms, red lip«, kind words, shirt exulting in buttons, re deemed stockings, boot-jacka, happi. ness, etc. Hurrah! 46?"“ “ How do I look, doctor?” ask jpjp* An experienced old gentleman ed a painted young ladv of the family says. “ All that is required for the en« L ittl e girls believe ip a man in the physician, “ I can’t tell, madam, till joy men t o f love or sausages is— oonfi • moon ; young ladies believe in a man you uncover your face,” waa the crush deoce!” in tbe honeymoon. ing reply.
