T
the west
|h
<j|
support IT J
G-JX u K T D H S T E I ^
Why let
a ll y o u r
n e ig h -
regular daily tkips H>
Barrett, Prop’r,
b o rs a n d
-----B etw een ■
Stage L eaves Steam boat Landing on
frie n d s
the U m pqua for Florence Saturdays.
think you
R eturning, Stage Leaves rlu ren ce
m u s t be
Sundays.
tw e n ty
E xtra Trips W hen N ecessary
S T E A M E R L I L L IA N
y e a r s
Charges R easonable.
-M A K E S D A IL Y T B I P 8 -
• b oîcer than you are ?
Yet it’s impossible to
From Mapleton to Florence
look young with the
E U G E N E -FL O R E N C E
-------- A N D R E T U R N .---------
color of 70 years in
the hair. It’s sad to
STA G E l in e .
Leaves Mapleton at 7 A. M.
see young p e r s o n s
Leaves Florence at 2 P M.
E.
B
a
n
g
s
,
P
roprietor.
On SUNDAY’S leaves M apleton at 8 A. M.
look prematurely old
Stflge leaves! E u g e n e fo r F lo r
and Florence at 3 P. M.
in this way. Sad be
ence d a ily e x ce p t S u n d a y a t 6 a. m .
A r r iv e s a t F lo re n c e th e d a y fo l
cause it’s all unneces
lo w in g a t 10 a . m .
sa ry ; for g r a y h a i r
THE STEAM ER
R e tu r n in g stage leaves F lo re n c e
may always be re
►
fo r F u g e n e d a ily e x ce p t S u n d a y a t 1
A C M E
s to r e d
a t 2 p. m . A n ives i n E u g e n e a t 0
STEAM ER
M A R G U E R IT E ,
O -----w i l l m ake --------
S T A O E
L IN E .
"Florera ani Heai of Tile.
O F F IC E R S
...........H . R . K incaid.
(
................. J. R . H ill
■ la tie ra
V
. . H . P . Edw ards
...............E . U . Lee
.. W . W . W ithera
■ g ............................ A . S. Patterson
_____
. . . 1). P . Burton
tool S u p e r in te n d e n t---- W . M. M iller
r v e y o r .l............................... C* M- C ollier
p. m . th e d a y fo llo w in g .
.G . W , f . r i i t i n
.. ,C . H . H olden W i l l c a rry fre ig h t a n il passengers
■ f . ........................G. C. Cum pton
from F lo re n c e to San F ran cisco . S in g le fa re
— — -
-
5.00.
R o u n d trip
-
-
-
-
9.0 0.
W i l l also b rin g u p fre ig h t
T ic k e ts fo r sale a t E . B ang s’
C IT Y O F F IC E R S .
**# w
#**
liv e r y b a rn , E u g e n e , and a t O. W .
F o r fu rth e r in fo rm irtio n in q u ire H u r d ’s office in F lo re n c e .
Marion Morris
- OF —
A l l th ro u g h fre ig h t on the stage
f E . A. Evana,
W ertherson,
e ith e r w a y b etw een E u g e n e au d
A. W . B E A D LE
&
CO.
Brynd,
M a p le to n , w ill be charged a t th e
risten sen.
22 M a r k e t St.
ra te o f tw o cents p er pou n d d u r in g
...........J . G. P help s
San F ra n c is c o , C a lifo rn ia . th e m o n th s o f O cto ber, N o v e m b e r,
...........O. W . Hurd
D ecem b er,
J a n u a ry ,
F e b ru a ry ,
M a rc h a n d A p r il, an d one cent per
. . .G . C. Cum pton
pou n d d u rin g th e m o n th s o f M a y ,
J u n e , J u ly , A u g u s t a n d Septem ber.
T J .M M S s
h eriff
<¡) is now fo r i
conomlc&l.
ts to the
at fo r five ceni
m e liquor a
N Pacific,
Florence Lodge N o. 107.
R egdlar com m unication on second
(MtOt Saturdays in each m onth .
E . W . C o b b , W . M.
B, M ills , S e c r e t a r y . __________
R
For over half a cen
tury this has been the
standard hair prepara
tion. It is an elegant
dressing; stops tail
ing of the h air; makes
the hair grow ; and
cleanses th o s c a l p
from dandruff.
N O T A R IE S .
S i.00 a bottle. All druggists.
A. R. BUTTOLPH,
** I have been using Ayer's Hair
Vigor for over 20 years and I can
heattily recommend it to the public
as the best hair tonic iu ex is tone©.”
Mrs. G. L. A ldeuson ,
A p ril 94, i n n
► J
*
'»•very 1st and 3d Tuesdays
M em bers and v isitin g
" " T r . ; bretbrsn-in good sta n d in g are cord ially
!4
invited to a tten d . A. O. F unke , M . \ \
I. G. K hotts , R ecorder.
A
N
it- u M p t h -
F lo r
S
P u llm a n
MOUk
C a rs
E le g a n t
D in in g C a rs
S le e p in g
FLORENCE. - -
-
Shaving
and
H aircu ttin g
neatly
done.
Razor Honing and Scissors G rind
5,000
H E L E N A »»d
BUTTE
G eneral B anking B usiness
T H R O U G H T IC K E T S Transacted on "Favorable Terms
TO
'.— Su nset Rebekah Lodge N o.
eets in Odd F ellow s’ hall,
e second and fourth T hars- O H IC A C O
;s in each m onth.
W A S H IN G T O N
K atherine B kund , N . G.
B eil , Sec.
P H IL A D E L P H IA
D ra ft. iw ued on the prin cip a l d tie a of the
U nited State, and foreign countrte..
Interest allowed on Demand Certificates of
Deposit when le ft stated period.
C ity and C ounty W arrants bought.
W . E. B R O W N ,
President.
tic k e t,
P . W . OSBURN.
C ashier.
Block,
ing a specialty.
*
*
F ro n t
S tre et,
*
Florence,
Oregon.
BEST FOR THE
BOWELS
C ollections receive our prompt attcn tlou.
etc., c a ll on or w rite
D . A . P A IN E ,
Vice President.
___________ _ _ _
.
thg’-----4 — t -SL
r
o st, e a s ie s t, m o st jie r fe e t w a y e l k e e p in g th e bow els
c le a r and c le a n is to ta k e
W . W . BROW N,
Aaa’t Cashier.
CANDY
C A T H A R T IC
WANTED—ACTIVE MAN f>F GOOD C H A R .V
ter Io d eliver nnd collect in Oregon, for old
established maiiufscturimr w holesale house.
<900 a year, sure pay. Honesty more than ex p eri
ence required. Onr reference, any bunk in any
city. Enclose self addressed stamped envelope.
»eurlxirn
M anufacturers, Third Floor, 331 Dei
Chicago.
A ssistant General Passenger Agent,
'‘ a t t o r n e y s
P po pr ie t o r .
*
and prom ptly
W IN N IP E G
— Ocenn W ave Camp No.
R. M c M u r p h e y ,
eets each alternate Saturday
G a le s’ H all, Acm e. V isitin g General Agent. Rooms 2 and 4, Shelton
invited to attend.
E U G E N E , OR EG O N.
G eo . G. P eil , V . C.
A. D C H A R L T O N ,
B erlin , C lerk.
*
M
M A R I O N * M O R R IS ,
CRO O KSTO N
,F .— Mignon Lodge N o. 105, N E W Y O R K
k ah Degree, m eets in M eyer &
, M apleton, the 1st and 3rd B O R T O N A N D A L L
'enings iti each m onth.
P O IN T S E A S T »»'> S O U T H
M attie 0 . H udson , N . G.
Fnr In fo rm a tio n , tim e c .rd n , m a p , and
B
ean
,
Sec.
.
UL
*
Of Eugene, Oregon
FARGO
GRAND FO RK*
TO
OREGON
Loan -3 Savings Bank
D U L U T H _______
K ctor, Tex.
T O N S O R IA L - P A R L O R .
EUGENE
M IN N E A P O L IS
_____
you do not obtain all the benefits
I f yow
you expected
expeek from the Vl*or, write
the Doctor
.
“—*■? about
It. Address,
D a. J. O. AYER.
Lowell, Maes.
A. A. a . A
PUBLIC.
C a rs
•T . FAUL
Irene E ncam pm ent, N o. 42,
I. O .’O. E. hall in Florence
and fourth Friday of earli
M em bers of th is degree are
ly invited to attend.
8 . J. S kymoub , O. P .
Scribe.
q
M O R R IS .
NOTARY
T o u ris t
M a|de Lodge N o.. 139, m eets
hursday even in g in M eyer &
, M apleton, Oregon. B roth
stan ding invited to atten d .
T. J. N xklv , N . G .
ps, Sec.
1
O re g o n
no«,
M A R IO N
S le e p in g
•very W
We ednesday ev en in g in Lod^e
H a .11,
ll Flore nice, O regon. Brothers in
g in v ited to atten d.
E . A. E van », N . G.
8ec.
i r
v is o r
N o tary P d b lic , S u rv ey o r
U
O. U. W- P erp etu a Lodge, N o. 131,
jr c
M
ORTHERN
3 E C R E T S O C IE T IE S .
255 M orrison St., Cor., 3d.
P o r tla n d , O r.
NO. 6.
and accom panied it w ith kicks on the
A F a b le F e r W orneau
i door, nnd after seven or eigh t m inutes
T here w as once a W om an wbe Fete
1 the druggist app ealed and Indignantly th a t her Husband staid Out too Late
HE THOUGHT HE HAD TAKEN POI- dem auded:
a t N ight. She therefore D evised »
“ W hat In thunder do you m ean by P lan to Cure him of this. H e r Plan
SON BY MISTAKE.
tryin g to kick m y door In?"
w a s to R ise Early In order to Insure
“I ’ve—I’ve taken poison!” replied Mr. his R etirin g Early.
T h e O ld M a n G ets n B ad S c a re , L o t
B ow ser a s he staggered In and sat
“ O nly In th is Way w ill he he able
W h e n H e F i n d . H im s e lf O a t o f
to g e t E nough Sleep,” she said.
D e n s e r H e E v e n s U p T h ln a s I n Il i a dow n.
“Oh, you hnve!
Couldn’t upset j H er H usband, who usnally Endeav
Own W ay.
things any other w ay, and so you took ored to P le a se her, rose W ithout Com
[Copyright, 1901, by C. B. Lewis.)
plaint a t S ix O'clock, but Continued
poison! W hat w a s It?”
T h e even in g had been a p leasan t one
“Laudanum !
I—I m ade a m istake. to sta y Out I-ate. Perceiving th at her
w ith the B ow sers, but Just as th ey I thought I w as taking cough sirup. P urpose w a s not Accomplished, the
w ere ready to go to bed Mr. B ow ser i D on’t d elay or I'm a dead m an!”
W om an ch an ged the Hour to Five
fe lt a touch o f sore throat and a n
“Probably grabbed up a bottle In th e 1 O'clock.
_ r
nounced:
! dark and guzzled aw ay.
T h at’s the I “T h e M orning H ours are the B e st fee
"I g o t m y fe e t w e t yesterd ay and j w a y w ith m ost m en. I ’ll give you a W ork,” she said, “and I understand
probably took i c M. I think I ’ll tak e a strong em etic, but I’m afraid It’s going th at th e M orning A ir possesses G reat
pretty big dose o f th at cough sirup of ! to be a close sh ave.”
Virtues."
m ine and bead it off. I suppose it's in ] T h e Idea, o f course, w a s to g e t th e
H er H usb and O bjected, but Rose a t
th e m edicine c h est on the sh elf?”
1 patient to throw the laudanum off his F ive, a s she W ished.
“Y es; I sa w It there th e other d ay,” Ltouiach, and for th e n ext h a lf hour
Still he continued to Com e In Lata.
replied Mrs. B ow ser, “b u t y o u ’ve got Mr. B ow ser w a s dosed after heroic Then the W om an fixed th e Hour ad
i m easures.
T he dru ggist finally an Four-thirty.
“ I have a lw a y s en joyed Seeing the
nounced th a t th e m om ent o f peril had
passed, but sen t him hom e to drink a Sun R ise.” sh e said.
“ In th a t C ase,” said her Husbaod
quart o f stron g coffee and advised that
he w alk up and dow n for a couple of decidedly, "I Shall N ot go to bed A t
hours. Mrs. B ow ser had the coffee All, since It w ould N ot bo W orth my
ready, and It w a s alm ost a hum an W hile. I w ill S tay up AU N ight and
w reck sh e gnzed at as he entered the take m y Sleep a t M y Office la the
house. Sh e hadn’t the heart to re Afternoon. So W e w ill have Break
proach him for his carelessn ess, and fa st a t Three O’clock If you like."
T h is te a ch es as th at th e E arly Were*
w h en he had disposed o f th e coffee she
helped him on w ith his overcoat aud w ill Turn.—C entury.
sa w him ou t on the street. H e hadn’t
A lw a y s W l l l l n e * • O b l i < - .
paced th e len gth o f the block before he
It w a s a T ex a s tow n , and a long
fe ll In w ith an old tramp w h o w as
looking for lodgings In som e doorw ay lim bed T exan w as m aking serosa the
and w h o w a s soon Inform ed o f w hat public square tow ard the courthouse
Jiad happened. H e w a s a rough look w ith a revolver In his band when he
in g man, b u t he had a kind heart, and w as stopped by a man who asked:
"Are you on your w a y to th e court-
ACROSS THE LABEL RAN THE WO«D “ LAVDA- ] he took Mr. B ow ser’s arm and said:
j “A ll right, cully. I see how It Is. h o u s e f
*UM.”
“ Yes. sir; I am,” was the reply.
...
such a lot of bottle« there that you Tired w ith the turmoil of life, you
“G oing to shoot an yb od y f
’
must be careful. Better bring It up started out to commit suicide, but
“Yes, sir; Lawyer Johnson. I f *
I thought better of It after swallowing
stairs when you have found It.”
When she had gone up stairs. M r. a dose. Just my case exactly. I've hadn't been for btm, 1 shouldn't bees
Bowser brought the chest down from ! tried It six different times. Easy now, lost my cose yesterday. Yes, slrffigolng
the top shelf of the closet and looked ' old rosebud! Lean on me, and we'll to fill him full of lead.”
“ Are you In any greet hurry atient
It over. I t was not long before he i w alk up and down and damn the eyes
Itf
lighted on the celebrated “Cure a Cold ' of the world In general together.”
“No sp ecial hurry, b u t w hen I hare
In Ten Seconds," recommended to him I "G ’way—g’way from mel" M r. Bow
■hooting on hand I lik e to get It Off tag
■lx months before by a traveling doc ser got up the strength to exclaim.
tor and put up by his fam ily druggist, | "Never, my conscience stricken mind a s soon a s possible.”
“O f course; buL yon sea, Lnwysv
and, elevating the bottle, he took a friend. I shall w alk w ith you, and as
hearty swig o f the contents. H e car we promenade you can pour your tale Johnson Is now argnlng a case tor me
ried np stairs w ith him a pleasant feel o f sorrow Into my ear and be sure of and won’t be through for 40 minutes.
He's going to win It for sure If net In
ing that his cold had been knocked Into my sympathy.”
terrupted, and I f you w ill only held an
They
had
been
w
alking
fo
r
nn
hour
the middle of last week, and nothing
interrupted that feeling until he Wee and Mrs. Bowser had been dividing her for awhile you w ill do me a greet fn-
In bed and sleep stealing over him and tim e between making more coffee In vor.”
“W hy, certainly; glad yon mentioned
the kitchen and looking out of the
Mrs. Bowser said:
“I hope you made no mistake about front door when the thought struck It; no hurry about the «bootleg so aa It
her to take a look a t the bottles. There comes off today, and you can count on
that bottle."
me. Have a drink w ith yon? W ith
“H o w could I make n mistake?” be was the cough sirup, end there was tbs
the greatest of pleasure, and I f John
laudanum, but the latter bottle had no
asked In a dreamy way.
son Is a particular friend o f yoorn I ’N
“ Easy enough. You nr? very absent- contents. In fact. It was as dry as a
shoot him as softly as I can and givs
minded. Don't yen remember e*ce boas. As there had been nothing In It to
him every show to die like • *
taking a tablespeonfnl e f sewing ma drink, M r. Bowser could have made no
man.”—Boston Globe.
mistake. She ran out a t once to Inform
chine oil In place e f * tonic?”
A doubt entered hla mind, and he eat him o f the facL The tram p was still
T h e tle e to l
up. T w o m ore doubts followed Ute solicitously leading him up and down
Tw o young ladies on 8L Paul i
nnd encouraging him to lir e on. Mr. went to the theater the other evenings
first, and he got out o f bed.
Bowser beard the news, took a moment and their father, thinking they had a
“W hat la It?” asked Mrs. Bowser.
“ I ’ve got to go down and see abont to digest It, and w ith a wild whoop of latchkey, went to bed at bis usual hoar,
that Infernal old bottle. 1 know It isn’t exultation be slammed the old man up and the servants all lefL Whan the In
possible that I got hold of the wrong against a shads tree, picked np the cat dies returned, they rang the hell re
stuff, but you've had to mix In nnd which had followed Mrs. Bowser and peatedly and beat on the door, hot get
make me wonder about IL I can al made a run for the house. Site follow Du answer. Finally they began to de
most Imagine that I feel a strange ed him, and as the door was closed be spair, when a neighbor who had bean
taste la my mouth.”
hind her end several other whoops awakened by the din appeared In White
H e growled to himself aa ho pulled came to hie ears the kind hearted tour at his window opposite and aakad what
on bis trousers and started down stairs. ist leaned over the gate nnd muttered: was the matter.
"W hy, I was about to strike the old
The cheat was on the stand ns he had
“W e are locked out and
left IL and ns ba lighted the gas the coon for n quarter, end here he’a gone awake papa,” came the reply la i
cat rolled off the lounge sad stared at and got over It and given me the cold
“ W alt a minuta,” said the i
throw dowel Hang a man who don’t ted men on the other aide of the i
him In surprise.
“ I t was the right bottle, of course," know when he’s got • good thlngl”
“Your father has a telephone in hla
M. Q uad .
be mused, "and w hat a fool 1 was to
room, and I w ill call him up." * 0 the
central was called.
“ Give me number —
aald the
neighbor.
t
As soon as the bell sounded In the
room of the sleeping father he awake
w ith a start and ran to the 1
“H ello, w h a t la the m atter?”
“ Is that you, So-and-so?”
“ Yes; w h a t Is wanted?"
"Your d au ghters arc at the front l
tryin g to g e t In. Open the door.
nlghL"—B altim ore Sun.
A S k e lr le a .
I
A.
it w ill>
do I t» S
liv ou Ut I
C. W OODCOCK,
r
A tto rn e y a t L aw ,
F
O re g o n
Rug«
m rn o o tn - 7 and 8 M ela re n ’« B uild ing.
Sp«el*lAiteui' <i> g iv e n to c o l le c t io n au d pro-
I m U bttsiues
F.
EU
c hfo
HlbliC
W I
C. H .
A T - P O R N E Y — A T - L A W
u d U. 8. L and C ommissioner .
L IK E C A N D Y
JO H N 0 . BEC K ,
F t. Terrace, O regon.
P le a sa n t. P a la ta b le , P o te n t. Tupt .» Good, Do G ood,
N ever Klck< n, W euken, o r G ripe, 10, t». and M co o ts
per box. W rite fo r fr e e num pfc, nnd b o o k le t on
h e a lth . A ddress
*"3
W . H . W EATHEBSON,
F lorence, Oregon
STEBU5H cxsmr roxrixT, nnrAfio or «F irm «.
KEEP YOUH BLOOD CLEAN
,
HOLDEN,
,
Florence Real Estate Agency.
so u g h t, sold And exchanged.
Tlm ker tknds » «peetsliy.
Prairie Hotel.
v-three
M ile s W e s t
Eugene.
E U G E N E AND
LO R EN C E
OE
RO UTE.
M o ney Saved
WANTED.—Capable, reliable peroon In every
roiin tv to reprewfnt large com pany of «olid
financial, reputation;
nalary per year, l»«ya-
F ble
1’ w eekly; <3 per day afcKolutely sure and all
penne.-*; straight, bona flf’e, definite »alary« no
huuiMsioii; naJary paid etwli Saturday and ex-
peiiHe money ad vti need each week. STANDARD
HOUSE. 834 D earbokn 8 t ., C hicago .
41-14
i
Do You W a n t a H om e In W e s te rn O regon
D O N 'T
a n il b e a u tifu l forests in th e S iu s la w v a lle y .
s
•
Do You W ant a Ranch?
Do You W ant Unimproved Land?
Kodol
Do You W ant Town Lots?
Do You W ant Timber Lands?
Dyspepsia Cure
Digests w hat you eat.
Prop
* HOTEL,
w ith
i o f th e season,
a ll
U lv o
1 1 artificia lly digests the food aud aide
WE BUY ANO SELL ALL KINDS OF REAL ESTATE
QN COMMISSION.
»T * BOB - t P ro p rieto rs.
lo r e n p e O re g o n .
fu rn is h e d
TOBACCO SPtT
and S M O K E
Your U fe a w a y l
You can be cured o f any form of tobacco uaing
easily, lx? mada w ell, atrong, magnetic, fu ll of
new life and vigor by tak ing H U - T O -D A O ,
that make» wreak men strong
Many ^ain
ten pound* in ten day». Over 5 0 0 , 0 0 0
cured. A ll druggist». Cure guaranteed. Book
let and advice FRRK.
Addr«»3 S T iyU JN O
REM EDY CO., C hicago or New York.
437
C o m e to F lo re n c e a n il see th e fine farm s
£ f » a t roniztng It.
ile
Ih o
us
;;
►BOWSER IN A PANIC.
T R A V E L E R S ' G U ID E
T R A V E L E R S ’ G U ID E .
A tto rn e y 'G e n e ra l D. R . N . B la c k b u rn
i ................... R . S . Bean
en
ota luorenoe C ourt \ .................F- A. Moore
with p«u,. r ' - ( . . . .G. E . W olverton
J, conallpau
ip la ln e d ut 1 <Jge 8e<x>nd D istr ict. .J . W . H am ilton
'ohiidreu^ofprosecuting A t t o r n e y .. .G eo. M. Brown
and w h .j
viSX-_____ —-----------
fnoed boy. Tl
tlpana Tabnl
t a n y o n e (!
'
FLORENCE, OREGON, FRIDAY. JU N E 7, 1901.
VOL.
erniari:»-« *•*'
X I I.
D erer rl Uv-^
lu lu a cro u d l
ih o n i gettW ’i
e u u d nick «¡HI
G E N E R A L D IR E C T O R Y
1 heard ¿SB
ab'Jlcs i - »tí J
in lu e w h o i J
tern fo r cafc
■mach. ShoXj
8 T A T E O F F IC E R S -
ich rullef
i sh e advise«
h em too, at
n d o in g so
. . . T. T. G eer.
v e rn o r .......................
aber, aud
,F . I. Dunbar.
h a v e comp] 8eci retary of S 'a t e -----
m y hcudbcl
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A D V E R T IS E R S
SHJSLAW’S ONLY PAPES.
(
O P P O R T U N IT Y J
4
YOUR H O H E PA P E R
y*W’ >
JOHN C. BECK.
W. H. WEATHERSON.
1
N atu re la strengthsulug and recon
structing th e exhausted dlgsstive or
gans. I t lath e latest discovered digest-
an t and tonic. N o o ther preparation
can approach I t In efficiency. It in-
stantly relieveeand perm anently cures
Dyspepsia, Indigestion, fle a rtb u rn .
Flatulence, 8our btomach, Nausea.
Sick Headache, G astralgla Cramps and
a ll other results of Im perfect digestion.
Prsaersd W
t- fc DvWlTT a CO. Cat*««»
MBVKB A KYLB.
W IT H A W IL D W HO O P O F E X U L T A T IO N .
hop out of bed and trot down here!
Here the blamed thing Is, and I f It
doesn’t say cough sirup on the label
then I ’m a”—
But it dldu’L As he held the bottlo
op to the light a picture of a skull aud
cfossboues gr-rted hla eyes, and across
the label ran the word “Laudanum.”
Mrs. Bowser heard a whoop and a
rush, and next minute Mr. Bowsic
dashed Into the room w ith the cat at
his heels.
"W hat on earth Is It?" she asked ■■
he began to gather np and pull on hla
socks and shoes.
“ I —I ’ve taken poison—laudanum!"
he gasped as bis teeth chattered and
bis eyes bulged ouL
“Then go a t ones to tbs drug store
for a remedy. H ow careless e f youl
Here Is your vesL Here’s year coat.
I f you bavs taken laudanum, you must
throw It off a t once and then drink a
lot of strong coffee.”
"Do you—you think I'm a dead
man?” he stammered aa he get Into
hla coat
"Don’t stop to ask • slugl« question,
bat fly for your life, end IT I go down
and get the coffee ready.”
It wae half past Id «Tclocfc.
M r.
Bowser hadn't waited to tie hie eboee,
put on a collar or button hla eoat and
vesL Aa he went np the street a t a
gallop sereral people «eked him where
the flr« was. aad a policeman Jemped
out from behind • trse and tried to
head h!m off. The drag store bed Jaet
cloeed, but be net the ben to rto g t'g
■ 1
"W hat Is a sk eleton? Can you tail
me, children?” asked a teacher o f het
Sunday school clss9.
T he In fant class^ looked troubled.
T heir Ideas on the su b ject w ere e f the
m ost vague description and, they seem
ed to think, hnrdly worth m entioning.
T he qu estion passed dow n the cla ss a l
m ost to th e very foot, m eeting only a
blank look or a sh ak e o f the bead, until
a t la st th e sm a llest tot o f a ll ventured
a reply ;
“P leath , m ith, It ith a m an wRhant
any m eat on It.” —London A nsw ers.
-------------- -—
—
•<
n . r R la h t e e a e l a d l a " a t l e ■ .
On B a tte r A a tk o r ltr .
She—Sister Mary called today, and
■he sa y s she teleph oned to K ashem 'a
drug store yesterd ay and ask ed them
to d eliver a m easnge to me, but they
wouldn't. I’ll never deal there again.
H e —B u t, m y dear, th at's three blocks
aw ay.
B esides, I didn’t know you
d ealt there.
She—But I do. I’ve bought p ostage
■tamps there qu ite frequently.—P h ila
delph ia P ress.
"Yon are looking handsom e tonlgfeL
M iss FUte,” B agster rem arked la the
pau ses o f the dance.
“So Mr. S m yth e told m s a fe w min
u tes ago.”
Bagster (only remembering that
Sm yth e is his hsted rival)— Wsll you
w ou ld n’t b elieve anyth in g th at chum p
said, w ould you?—P hiladelphia Tin
A a B a e a o a a le a l C r e s s a tla n .
“ Excuse me, sir,” said the man In the
te x t seat, "but your cigar Is burning n
hole In your paper.”
“T h a t la all right,” reepowjed the
other. " I am Just burning out the
price of those sealskin mantles at to
I
morrow’s bargain sale.
You
take thia paper home."—Nuggets.
la
O ld K e a l a e k g .
The parson cams out and remonstrat
ed with the major for being too hasty
with his gun.
“ After he said t h a t ” M id the parson,
“you should have forgiven him.”
“And didn’t I f spoke ep the major.
“Why. person. 1 wee eoe of his paD-
C on (H ot le a O r le r a .
“T h e average photographer."
H enpeck m usingly, “is an unren
hie creature.”
“W hat’s the matter now?" asked Me
friend.
"Oh. w h ile m y w if e w a s sittin g fee
her picture today the tool photographer
su n g out: ’Look pleasanb please. Be
natural P ' -P h ila d e lp h ia P ress.
m a r k T e e th .
The custom of women I n _
.nnrrlsge g ivin g their tseth an eresv
last< ig coating o f biackit
now by only • small
there are stlil seen in the
dreds of women hideous
Ivory and dentists’ Shea
sets of black teeth.
bearsrs.”—Chicago Nswe.
A man who gets Into
never making
■«••liv Wenrta*.
too sear perf<
"Ruggles. I nevar sew you looking so Chicago News.
woebegone before. Are you In lo v e f
"Tee, but I ’ ve got the grip. too. and I
Oqod advice la like i
den’t know which of the two hurts me live, but i
Wm