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CURl CONSTIPATION
ABSOLUTELY GUARAHTEED ï
ALL
druggists ¡
î
pie«»,I booklet free. AS. STKBI.IJi« KXVKI1I CO., (’hirsvu, « oiitr.nl. fan .. or Nf o lurx.
LOVE’S YOUNG DREAM.
I t ge«*nu*tl F»«Uu< A «ray, b u t M I m
M e r e ly AXlauutfcntood H im .
4N IDEAL BACHELOR.
Siulff
A W RITER W HO UNO ERTAKESTO TELL
A .L ABOUT HIM.
Three ★
Desirable
-NDV CATHARTIC
Stars in *
* f»T ¡r .
T w o F riend ».
The late Mr. H G. Bunner, tho editor
of Puck, nud Lawrence Hutton were
the closest of frieuds They began says
Mr. Hutton, in his sad reminiscence of
his dead friend, publi-hed in The I' i»k-
man, in that oftcu desiriLL g
II*
"with a little aversion.” E i
d
even an introdn tiou to the • .. r 1 i!
fate actually threw them together, 3t
to be parted more. 'Ibeir mutual “ good
tim es” were dear at the m o m iu t nnd
“ pleasant, too, to think on.' There
Was much “ excellent fooling” there,
nnd when Hutton was murried it but
added a third desirable member to 1 lie
company. The marriage itself shows on
what terms of happy nonsense they
lived. Mr. Hutton says:
He and Mr. Telford and I spent to-
gather at tho Westmoreland and iu
Bunner’s rooms the la_t evening of my
single life. He hud heurd that luck
would be insured if the gro m, ou the
occasion of his marriage, would wear
“ someihing old, something new, some
thing borrowed and something blue.”
He urged, therefore, my appearance
next day iu a pcir of socks procured es
pecially by him for me. O ue was abso
lutely unworn, the 01 her had seen serv-
ico and was darned, but they were both
blue And I must borrow them
Mr. Tclfcrd, I rtuiem' er, lent mo a
necktie for the same purpose, and both
of those dear boys were married, wheu
their time came, in something blue that
was borrowed from me.
When Bunner was married, we sent
his wifo a traveling clock as a wedding
gift, to which I attached a card Learing
these lines:
★
w
MEN
ANTED—FAITHFUL
A R id e F o r R e p u ta tio n .
While they were discussing tho melee
t T or women to travel lor re-
in the school board the head of a big sponsible established house in Oregon
manufacturing establishment was moved Salary $780 and expenses. Position
to relate this experience:
permanent. Reference. Enclose self-
” 1 was once a pedagogue myself. I addressed stamped envelope.
The
had resolved to do something worth National. Star Insurance Bldg., Chicago.
w hile in the business world, and having
no capital except what was wrapped up
Justice In the Rough.
in my person I taught school to get a
“ We used to call him the cactus edi
starter. I had some advanced students
tion of Blackstone, ” said the major,
and had to skirmish iu order to* keep up
who hud lived iu Texas long enough to
w ith the procession. One day the whole
make a fortune, “and tho blind eyed
class was stumped by an arithmetical
goddess never had a moro peculiar rep
problem, and so was I. In order to gain
resentative. The law never bothered
time for myself I camo the old dodge of
him a bit, but he reverenced equity.
telling them liow much better it would
be if they would work out the solution He had a dignity all his own, but never
for themselves and gave them another sllowed it to interfere with his love of
a joke.
day.
“ ‘How old are you?’ asked one of the
“ That night, behind locked doors and
closed blinds, I worked iu fear and per lawyers of a venerable spinster ou the
spiration. From the bottom of my trunk Itand.
“ ‘I was born in ’46,’ she snapped.
I took a key to tho arithmetic, hut even
" ‘B. O. or A. D. ?' quickly asked the
with that aid I failed to master the
problem. By midnight I was desperate. |udge. Anil tho muture maiden disowned
It would never do to let the scholars, her brother because he would not chal
the parents and the whole cruel world lenge the court.
" ‘Is this your first offense?’ he asked
know that I was not equal to my posi
tion. But i t ’s net iu my make up to sur if a convicted horse thief.
"Ou being assured that it was, the
render while there’s a fighting chance.
‘ ‘At the town, ten m iles away, there Judge said, ’Then I w ill only give you
was a loyal and highly educated friend 89 years instead of 100, as I would have
of mine. He would help me and say done had you been an old offender. ’
“ A miller had bought ten barrels of
nothing. It was one of the bitterest
January nights I ever knew. But I slip apples from a farmer and brought ac
ped to the barn, appropriated a horse, tion to recover ou a claim that the bar
made a ride more notable than many of rels were undersized, causing him a loss
these immortalized in song or history, □f three bushels on tlie deal.
“ ‘How did you get the barrels?’ asked
froze my ears and toes and had m y vocal
the court of the fanner.
powers reduced to a whisper.
“ ‘Bought them full of flour from the
"B ut you should have heard my w his
pered explanation of (hat problem and miller. ’
’ ‘ Wherenpcu the court gave the farmer
my regrets th u t none of tho pupils had
a verdict and taxed the costs againat the
mastered it /”— Detroit Free Press.
miller. ”—Detroit Froe Press.
She bud met him at the door w ith a
loviug kiss, but a moment later, when
they hail taken seats in the parlor, she
rapidly removed the six engagement H ow H e M ust lire»« a u .l th e R a le s o f Con-
d u ct l i e M u tt O b se rv e to lie C laascd m
rings be bail given her and handed them
a " C o m p le te B a c h e lo r ” — H is M anner
over with the remark:
W ith Lad if* an d S ervan ts.
“ Mr. .Samuel X. Johnsing, I ’ze frew
w id yo’ and y o ’r deceit, and yo can eon-
There are those who would say that a
I der our engagement dun busted in
bachelor has no business to be complete;
tw o."
“ W-wltatl” ho gasped as the jewelry that it is tho duty of every young man
dropped from his trembling hand and to marry at the earliest practicable mo
great iieads of perspiration came out on ment and so give over tho selfish joys
his forehead. “ H aiu’t yo’ my true lnh of b:iehelorhood. But as long as young
men in their lamentable desire to be
no m o’?”
“ No, sab .” site replied coldly. "A comfortable refuse to look at the matter
mun may ileeeib dis lady onoe, but do in that light there is need that they
second time she’s gwine to diseert her should be duly instructed in the proper
ties of their position, and what better
self. ”
"B-but, muh angel,” he stammer instructor could they have than the
Sola W ith
ed, “ w ho’s bin puttin dis trash in y o ’r anonymous genius who writes of things
sweet head ’bout me deceibin y o ’?”
1 “ As Seen by H im ” in that very fash-
" N o one, sab. I dun seen de hull iounblo publication, Vogue? It is he who
tells them what “ (he complete bach
th in g w id my own tw o eyes. ”
“ B-but liow ’d I do it, muh lubbly elor” should be, and if they are wise
they w ill listen to his words. A ll the
dream, bow’d I do it?”
“ Mr. Johnsing,” she answered, “ I ’zc contingencies which arise in the social
mighty young, mighty innercent, and life of the bachelor are duly considered.
jus trustiu us a spring chicken, but I ’ze First, there is the matter of his public
got eyes and saw' y o ’ wipin off dat kiss manners, in which many men who re
I 'stowed 011 y o ’ as y o ’ come in dis gard themselves ns w ell bred are w oe
fully deficient. They w ill smoke in tho
euvenin. ”
street, keep women standing on corners
“ I— I neliber did, m uh” —
“ Dis am de second time y o ’ dun dat w hile they talk to them, sit w hile wom
low down trick, sah, and I can neblier en are standing, carry sticks or umbrel
trust yo ’ no mo'. Huh, and only las’ las at offensive angles, stare women out
night y o ’ suiil do6e kisses was dearer to of countenance at theaters or hotels,
nnd in general make nuisances of them-
yo' dan pigs’ foot!”
j selves. Now, a bachelor who w ill do
“ B-but” —
For old tlmo'B salt©
Will you and H. C. B.
“ And den y o ’ wipe 'em off us if dey uny of these things is wretchedly in
complete.
At
tills time take
was dirt. Mr. Johnsing, leab me w hile
The time from mine nnd mo?
Then cornea tho qnestion o f clothes.
I slied bitter tears over my pore broken
Nothing moro distinguishes the gentle
Time is, time was.
heart.' ’
Let time be old or now,
He hail been doing u deal of thinking man than what ho wears. Nor is it
Thi
1 times f-r us
w hile she was talking, nnd there was a enough, ns many do, to be nice in the
Aru high old times with you.
W a v e N a m es.
look of injured innneeuee on His face as matter of gloves, shoes or cravats and
To this the lady responded:
A H y g ie n ic ReMtaurazit«
owe largo sums to tho tailor. Dressing
he stood up and said:
I have a noto of some curious names
I
lack
tho
tune,
in
spite
of
thne
from
you,
A
snggestiou
worthy of all praise ia
1
is
not
so
much
a
mat
ter
of
money
us
a
"M iss Smiff. sometimes things haln’t
To write the heartfelt thunks I feel ere due.
given locally to the waves on different
pnt forth by a contemporary journal for
jes' what dey seem, anil dis am one of matter of taste. After a mnn h ut pnt But every p acin g hour wb Je time endures
parts of onr coast that may be worthy
ladies. It is to tlie effect that somebody
de times. ’Stead of wipin off dose kisses his wardrobe in proper condition he Shall speak to mu and mine of you and yours.
of record. These were culled from The
None who are engaged in any of the mechanical
should start a restauruut iu which the
yo' speak of I was jes’ rubbiu dem in may get along remarkably w ell on a
Fam
ily
Herald
a
few
years
ago.
I
can
O ne o f th e R a r e st R ook s.
I
very
sm
all
yearly
sum
.
Our
author
docs
waiters
should
be
instructed
to
refuse
to
kuso dey was so sweet. “
pursuits can succeed without reading and
Among the books of a comparatively not give the exact date. Tho names are serve uuy sequence of dishes which ob
And then the cold look disappeared not disdain »0 give economical hints,
curiously varied and sometimes not a
receut
date,
if
tho
Revente,
utli
century
viously make for indigestion. Oue can
studying this standard Magazine of Sciences
from Miss “ Sm iff's” face, the engage to tell how the tailor around Jhe corner
little suggestive. Tlie Peterhead folk
m ent ringM were hunted up and restored w ill do perfectly w ell some tilings for cau be described as such, is, as the E l call the large breakers that fall w ith a easily believe that the world would he
nnd mechanical Arts. I t is illustrated with
to .her fingers, and the lovemaking that which tho “ sw ell” tailor would charge zevir collector well knows, the famous crash on the teach by the grim name of the better, the healthier, the happier, if
w ent ’ou ïiH hkt"rœ ni"during the" next ' 1-oun<!ly ’ to explain how to get out of a ‘ ‘Pâtissier Francois, ” a small duodecimo
this proposal were widely carried ont.
“
Norrawa
(Norway)
carpenters.”
On
all modern cuts of latest inventions in all
«
hour
could ■
have been - heard - a --
hloek - suit the utmost possible service. Such printed by Louvsand Daniel Elzevir at the low Lincolnshire coast, as on the Men have been known, for instance, to
J things are beneath no m an’s attention, Amsterdam in 1055. A faulty and poor
wash down oysters with brandy and
aw ay.— N ew York Sunday Journul.
southwestern
Atlantic
fronting
shore
of
the brandies of mechanism, and its fund of
though ho bo a genius or a millionaire. réimpression of a work of little value
these islands, the grandly long unbroken water, but they have always been sorry
Until tho nrt of dressing properly is un issued in Paris two years previously,
for
it
afterward.
Students
at
tlie
British
T w o F a v o r it e .,
waves are know’u us “ roBers. ” Among
knowledge is inseparably connected with in
A gentleman w alking upon tho street derstood, tho moral progress of society this book has become the most sought East Anglians a heavy surf, tumbling in museum have been observed to drink
after
of
all
he
Elzevir
works,
just
be
w
ill
remain
an
idle
dream.
Wo
need
tea
with
veal
and
ham
pie,
and
their
w a s beset at tho heels by a yelping
ventors and mechanics. Sold with T he
w ith an offshore wind, or in a calm, is j
black nnd tan dog, the owner of which, not add that tho man w’ho wears a cause it is wrongly thought to bo the called by the expressive name of a studies have suffered from tho combina
senroest.
It
nas
fetched
prices
reaohing
“
made
tie
”
belongs
in
the
outer
dark
tion.
The
world,
in
short,
is
full
of
W est at clubbing rates.
just behind, seemed quite oblivious to
ness of barbarism. It is gratifying also in France as high as 4,600 francs. The "«log, ” w h ile a w ell marked swell, roll middle aged men who would enjoy their
her dog’s behavior.
ing in independently of any blowing, is
reason
for
tlie
supposed
rarity
is
of
to
noto
that
tho
uso
of
the
Tuxedo,
or
Seeing 1 hat the woman made no effort
called a “ hom e.” “ There is no w in d ,” ’ middle age ever so much better if in
lo call off the animal, the gentleman liouso coat, is earnestly recommended. course that, iusteud of bting placed on a Suffolk fisherman w ill say, “ but a tlieir youth they had found their way to
its
first
appearance
on
the
shelves
of
the
turned upon his ¡xirsecutor auil adiuiu- I ' Since every complete bachelor w ill in
nasty home on tho beach.” Suffolk men restaurants where snob delicacies, as
lstorod a hearty kick, which made the variably dress fcr dinner, lie w ill find curious or the studious, the little vol also speak of the “ bark” of the surf, veal and ham pie, dressed crab, lobster,
x'liomy recoil, w ith Hits tail between hit in the Tuxedo an economical and easy ume was thumbed to pieces by the and a sea covered w ith foam is spoken mayonnaise and encumbers were only
substitute for the more rigorous full greasy hands of cooks and kitchen maids.
legs anil a bind kiyi.
of as “ feather white. ” Tho foam itself to be procured upon produetiau of a
“ B rute,“ cried the woman, “ to kick dress coat, and ono that eau I ks worn Uenuiue enthusiasts in the printer’s art is known as “ spoon drift. ” So in tlie medical certificate of fitness to receive
St little dog like that! Thut little crea not ouly at home, but in informal com buve hoped to see tlie price dimiuished vernacular w e have it, “ The sea was all I them.—London Graphio.
ture, sir, is u pet mid is unused to such panies of gentlemen and at the theater In presence of the revelations lately a feather whito w ith spoon d rift.”— j
Its market
D ead 3 J a n ’ a C laim .
treatment, ” nud she bestowed a freez or m a publie restaurant. We note that furnished concerning i t
N otes and Queries.
our author speaks a gixxl word for tho value, however, shows no signs of dim
in g glance upon the offender.
Among tho rich mines of Leadville is
H e Said "Poke nnd I* van a .**
| one called Dead Man’s Claim. It seems
“ I beg your pardon, m a'am ,’’ replied block tio w ith a Tuxedo, though he does inution, and that one ropy, sold in
Joe Cavan, who has had a whirlwind a certain popular miner had died, and
lio. “ I did not mean to hurt your dog. not absolutely bar u white one. This is Englnnd during the last seven or eight
You should have called him off when a question upon which no thoroughly years, fetched at isothi by’s on June 10, experience iu the south and west, said his friends, having decided to give him
1
lie was barking auil suuppiug at my satisfactory ruling lias ever been made. 1896, the sale being thut of the Earl of to the crowd in tho samu old plucc, the a good send off, hired a man for $20 to
For our own part, wo think thut those Orford, the preposterous prioe of £100. up town hotel:
heels. ”
act as sexton. It was iu the midst of
—
Gentleman's
Magazine.
“ My advice to you all is, be natural. winter, there was ten feet of snow on
"He would not have hurt yon, sir," 1 occasions whereon a man feels a w h ile
tie incumbent also demand a “ swallor
This monthly magazine is ono of the « |
Do not try to deceive people w ith your the ground, and the grave had to go six
replied the woman. “ He is a p et.”
Muat
C
on
q
u
er
If
T
h
ey
W
a
n
t
S
h
e
lte
r
.
affected talk or in your clothes. You feet below that. The gravedigger sal
I
“ I diil not care to he bitten by him, ta il” coat.
Tho toilet is not less important than
The German soldier, s ys the Loudon w ill be certain to show the cloven foot lied forth into the snow, depositing the
host printed in this country, and it*
notwithstanding that fact, m a'am ,” re
turned tho gentleman. “ I am some the dress. Scrupulous care in this re- News carries liis owu house on his back semewhere. I was at a dinner once in corpse for safe keeping in a drift, and
to all subscribers a t rates within
thing of a favorite at homo myself. ” — speet is certainly tho mark of a com — that is to say, his share of a shelter St. Louis. It was given by Governor for three days nothing was heard from
plete bachelor. Thut a mail should take tent. Tho stout pieces of waterproof Muruiadr.ke. Before wo had given onr him. A delegation sent to find the fel
Y outh’s Companion.
ability of all to pay. I t is finely®
his tub every morning gix-s without say sheeting ure joiued together so as to orders, for at a western dinner every low discovered him digging away with
ing. At the same tim e (here is no need form three sides of a square, and the mail has the privilege of saying what he all his might, but found also the in
T t i . I>i«g,ut«i<l C h in a m a n .
trated and presents the names of fa®
The police of San Francisco have re to insist upon the rigor of the game anil men are suved from the worst in wind wants, the governor asked each oue of tended grave converted into the entrance
and
rain.
The
idea
of
the
shelter
tent
say
th.,t
tho
water
sh
all
he
cold.
Tepid
his
guests
where
he
hailed
from.
One
cently been enforcing the law prohibit’
of a shaft. Striking the eurth, it seems
authors as contributors. T he
irig work ou Bunday, especially aguinst water is best. “ Every man should learn iu sections is no new 0110. The French was from Tennessee, one from Illinois, he had found pay rack worth $00 a ton.
to
shave
himself.
”
These
are
golden
had
it
many
years
ago
in
their
ttnte
one from California. The east was not The delegation at once staked outclainis
and the Cosmopolitan are sold si
Chinetw luundrynien. Last Sunday, as a
large load of these offenders was being words. A hurber is occasioually neces d'abri. It has many advantages. It re represented, so I bunded in my card adjoining his, and the deceased was for
sary
no
doubt,
but
there
is
something
duces
tbo
baggage
of
the
army,
and
it
duced rates at this office.
from Vermont. Just then the waiter gotten. Later iu the season, the snow
carted to jad iu the police ambulance,
» resident of the western Addition asked offensive to refined sensibilities iu the enables the so lu iertogoiiito lodgings at paused the bill of fare, and, my ruling having melted, his body was found and
the reason and was informed by a po picture of a long row of men in chairs once on reaching the scene of tho passion asserting itself, ‘Poke and given an ordinary burial iu another part
beans, ’ said I in my natural voice.
liceman. " Y ep ,” grunted u disgusted having a part of their toilet performed. bivouac.
of the camp.—Boston Journal.
Troops often suffer miserable discom
“ ‘Cavan, ’ said the governor of Mis-
Ghinaiuan, who sttxxl near, ‘ 'man workee Our author «ays notliflig of the habit of
Having
boots
blacked
in
the
street,
ju
st
fort
in
w
aiting
for
hours
for
their
heavy
A T est o f C ourtesy.
souri vehemently, ‘you're from Georgy.
Sunday, he go ja il— 'gainst law workee
It happened not long ago that I had
Nunday. Mnn no workeo, he go jail— ly regarding it as one »0 hail as to he tents. The Germaus have no faith in No man from Vermont ever suid ‘poke
uuspcakublo. Patent tooth powders, these cumbrous contrivances. They have and beans, ’ nud your scheme of passing occasion to request a friend to deliver
vag. Amelieu heap h— 1 of couutly.
washes, pomatums and nostrums of often scut whole armies into tlie field for a Yankee, sub, is reprehensible and an urgent letter for me. Tho letter con
Argonaut.
every kind arc condemned without re without any sort of shelter. Their tlie- | w ill cost yon the wine. ’
tained business of importance which
I’ln l« >tr«*M<t W o u ld Do,
serve. This, too, shows gixxl souse. The ory is thut if the men win u battle they
“ I liavo sailed under my own colors wns private in its nature, as it conceru-
The Lady nt the Kitchen Door— No, care of toilet articles is rightly insisted w ill find all they want in the towns and ever since.” —N ew York Sun.
j cd a debt. To hand my friend a sealed
I ’ve nothing fur yon. I find it very hard upon. A man cannot ho a complete villages, and that if they lose it they
letter was to presuppose tliat he would
to make both e n d s m eet these days.
bachelor unless he is w ellin g to take w ill have no tim e to pitch tents. The
T h e ir P e c u lia r A v e m lo t« .
read it if open. To give it to him un
Blizzard B ill— If youse w ill make some trouble. TI10 custom of weariug shelter tent stems a compromise be
Most people have aversions of some sealed was to risk the possibility of a
both cuds bread and never mind do the hair long is disapproved.
tween theso views.
kind or other, and some very strange third party reading it, for the exigen
meat, I'll be puffckly satisfied, mum.—
No point is tixi minute for the consid
ones. The sight of a set of false teeth cies of life are many, aud letters arc
Man'« n itte r e a t E n em y.
Baltimore News.
"We do not take possession of onr ideas but are possessed by then
eration of this thoughtful writer The
makes John L. Sullivan sick at the known to have been dropped.
eti,¡nette of cards is a matter upon
“ Sin is alw ays inau’s bitterest en stomach. Napoleou did not like to sec a
I
pondered,
perplexed,
but
decided
They master us and force ns into the arena,
Anir»tl,«.«lu e n d 1’a b lle lty .
which lamentable ignorance is often em y," writes D.viglit L. Mtxxly iu whito dog. Agnssiz could not bear to that courtesy was oue of the first laws
Where like gladiators, we must fight for them.”
Di’utixt (ax (lio patient opens his displayed, and in calling nnd dining “ Mr. Moody s Bible Class” iu the Lu- touch polished steel. Tlie sight of the of society and left the letter open.
«yes)— It'» out.
out there nro those who show tho lock dics' Home Journal. "It separates him rising tiKxiu, when it was full, always
With an easy bow my friend received Such is the exalted motto of the Arena, and the
P atient (still dizzy from tlie gas)— of bnxxling. The practice of grasping from his Maker. It separates liiui from made Mine, de Stael ill. Barefooted the note; then, seeiug the open flap of
Yea, of course. 1 never got drunk iu my or squicziug the hand of a lady is (bar his fellow brings. No position is too children made Louis XIV nervous. Dean tbo envelope, instantly gummed it
entire contents of this monthly magazine
life that it didn't get o u t —Detroit ring exceptional circumstances) unad- high for sin to ¿chase; no place so hal Swift has said thut Boliugbroke would down.
are
ÿfawa.
visable. “ A man removes his glove lowed but it sc, kt to corrupt; no home “ act like one bereft should he east his
upon a plane and in keeping with its
That, I said inwardly, is true cour
from his right hand on entering the so sacred but it seeks to destroy. ’Sin, eye ou a poor, harmless toad.” Disraeli tesy.
M uch l u a N m i » ,
motto. The Arena’s gallery of eminent
drawing room, and holds this, with his like holiness, is a mighty leveler, ’ says had an attack of vertigo when he saw
A ftr r a R eco rd .
stick anil hat, in his left. The hat should a distinguished divine. Aud what may anybody chewing gum. Dickens never
thiukew u a group of interesting men and
"Strange,” told tlio man w ith the
he at an angle, tho top about level with he the ouusoof the thousands of suicidos liked a stiff shirt bosom, and Buffon
his nose. ” This is important. But some which have occurred during the pust would fly into a rage if any oue pnt an strong cigar absentmindedly.
women, and their thoughts are worthy the
thing more than mere ¡xiliteuess is re year if it is not a lonthiug of self? It is egg oil the diuiug table ut which he sat.
"What's strange?” asked the man
with the meerschaum.
quired of the complete bachelor. His sin, then, winch makes a man loathe
consideration of all people. The Arena
is
gooduess of heart w ill come out in his himself. It is sin which makes man's
A R ou tb lark '» N ovel S ch em e.
I
wus li n k in g of a friend of mine
The most enterprising bootblack In Wh? c1“"118 ,o huve
au absolutely
treatment of his servants. Though he life become u burden from which lie so
sold with T he W est .
"
. . lias a perfect fountain nen
pen. »•
’
y
1
must “ exercise an iron w ill,” he must often seeks to free him self by his own New Y'ork J-
is a young negro
who
/
I
also • ’encourage them now and then by hand.”
“ Always writes, never drips ink and
stand ou Columbus avenue not far front
/
\
a kind word. ” Ana once in aw hile they
the Natural History museum. His loca never gets ont of order?”
O r t< l. o f H i. S lileaad d le.
“ T hat’s what he says. ”
x
must have a holiday or some cast off
tion is one w hich does not bring much
The use of tho side saddle for women
clothing. They, in their turn, should
Tlie man with the meerschanm pipe
transiont trade, but he has a goodlv
Ixi "noiseless and automatic. ” Such riders is traced to the time of Aune of number of regular customers. Ou days shook his bead.
"What do you think c f it?” he asked.
things too many young men forget. Bohemia, eldest daughter of the emper wheu the weather looks threatening this
"I hardly know what to think of i t
With this Ixxik, however, they cannot or of Germany, who married Richard wise young man issues rain checks, gixxl
go very far astray. They can learn how II of Engliiud. Previous to this dste all for 12 hours, so that if it rains and a H e’s joiued no liars’ club that I know
to behave at dances and at country English women bestrode their horses iu customer's shine is ruined he gets a new of, and yet everything indicates that he
houses and nt clubs. If it he objected manly fasinou, hut on account of a de one frew of charge The rain cheeks are is working for a record.” — Chicago
that on tL # j subjects gentleiueu do not formity this German bride was forced slijis of paper with tlie date and hour
insxl iustructiou, the retort is obvious. to use a side saddle, and the custom be written in pencil.— New York Press.
Something New.
Persons w hs sre not gentlemen have came gvuernl.— Pittsburg Dispatch.
The Chicago Tiuies-Ht rald says that
their ambitions and frequently try to be
O f C ourse.
W h . l H e A O h I F o r,
a western gentleman lately found hit
come complete bachelors. And since ■
First Small Boy— I wish I had that 6 new cook iu the drawing room, gazing
A tramp tumbled out of a store, «texxl
this is so, let ns be grateful for the
rents back I »jx-ut for candy.
w ith much interest at the aquarium
mentor who is able to give them so ou his ear u moment and tiieu col
Second bnn.ll Boy— What would you
“ Well, Bidtlv.” said ti... genthman
lunch excellent advice. — Providence lapsed iu a heap
do with it?
iu a kindly tone, “ what do you think of
"Hello!" cn«d a bystander. "What’s
“ Is your uew pony fast?”
Journal.
First
Small
B
ey-
Buy
more
candy.—
them?”
01
the matltr? ’
’ Yer; so fast that I ’ve named him
Besti u Coun r.
Bure,
tor.
”
answered
the
cook,
"nn.
“
Excuse
me,
pard,
"
said
the
va
The
father
of
biography
was
Plutarch
<Yhut Ma Bays. ”
on my soul, if they ain’t rale lovely!
(M tica are generally agreed that the grant. "I jn d weul in there ami asked
" T h at’s a queer name?”
The conn • ti l-.onse fly lays four tim'W An. Ixgorra, perhaps yon wouldn't be-
Philadel
"Yea, but what ma says g«»-». ” — N ew tuixlel biography is that, of Johitaun, by that feller to help me out.
in n a h i - t .i w r , each time aU u t SO l.3 o it, but this is the first time that I
p h ia KecunL
JBwivell.
V
Vprk Journal.
fret Saw red herrings aBve before. ”
And The
JL F L T S a n d
S C IE N C E S ,
» T Ü E
"W E S T -
Scientific American..
THE EnSfflnPniJTAH,
the arena
LOOK OVER THIS CROUI
make your selection .
THE WEST.
FLORENCE. 01