H PTTTT1
X X IJ U
gVARVERUD &
■ \Ä 7 _T T , M I p 1 as lie rose up. “ You are jest like you
VV P
X .
to be_ j est a8 „,ean and techy
ever.
“ And I have no doubt you are the
— AT—
same old skinflint and fault finder.”
L ank C ounty ,
° '" !GOS I ..
, W hat! Some folks blamed me
F lo r k x c k ,
fur fillin ' a divorce, but I guess they
A L I .r .V A B R IT O N .
1-ui.ll.l.er., wouUn,t t h e y eouia hear you get in
CO,
W H O LESA LE A H D R E T A IL D E A LR E S IN
— I’UBLISHKI) EVERY FRIDAY MORNING.—
A gricultural
E ditor . ! and ta lk .”
B. F. A lley ,
. . .
“ I don’t care w hether they would or
A. S. B liton , Local Editor and Manager.
-T erm s : $2.00 a year in advance.
n o t!”
“ Wall, by gum !” said the old m an as
i he sat down beside me, “ but this carries
I mplements
,
.
...
. V1
me right hack to three years ago! Seems
E ntered a t th e post-office nt Florence,
. (
,. |, n ’d izit up
L ane county, Oregon, as second-class as if we was jaw in a io
m ail m a tte r.
aiui bu, u the fire of Jin u ary m ornin ,
*■
| and th a t she was sassin’ me after th e
advertising hates made known on ah -
plication .
'o ld fashion, and declarin she d lay there
I ■„ tl , I Hunk through into the cellar
ENGINES, THRESHERS,
Local notice* s cent* per line, each Insertion, i Hll 1
afore sh e’.l build a lire fur me or any
Stirred His Memory.
A plain middle-aged woman had ls>en
sittin g in the passenger coach at my left
hand for th e last th irty miles when a
m an about fifty years of age and plainly
dressed got on at a small station.
lie
had taken th e scat ahead of me, buthap-
|M*ning to look aroutxl ami observed the
woman he jum ped up ami went over to
other man on earth !”
Not His Ideal, A fter All.
—
--------
. . .
1 ,
Three or four men were adm iring th e j
ease w ith w hich a driver of a beer wag- I
on was handling the kegs, lilting them
from th e vehicle to th e sidewalk with
a d ex terity th a t was alm ost marvel*
ous.
“ And th a t m an, strange to sa y ,” re
h er with a :
m arked one of the group, “ never d rin k s
“ W all, by gosh! hut w ho’d a thought
b eer.”
i t ! Howdy do, M ary?”
They looked the beer driver over again,
“ Howdy do, S am uel,” she replied as
lie was indeed a m agnilicieut specim en
th e y shouk hands and he Hat down be
of brawn ami muscle. He was fully six
side her.
feet high and weighed two h u n d red
“ W liar’ ye going?” he asked.
i pounds.
“ Down hom e to E llen d ale.”
“ You say he never d rinks b e e r? ’
“ L ivin’ down there, he y e?”
said another.
“ Y es.”
“ Never known to touch it except as
“ You look jest th e sam e as ever. I ’d
you see him now—only in unbroken
a knowd you in C h in e .”
“ Yes, I d o n 't suppose I ’ve changed
m u ch .”
“ W all, I often thin k about ye, and I
hope yo u ’ll do well. 1 had to get a di
vorce from you, because we couldn’t
agree, but 1 don’t lay it up ag in ’ you ns
some would. M arried agin I ’m told.
“ Y es.”
" I'u rty decent sort o’ fellar?”
“ l i e ’s a good m an —a very good
m a n .”
• • i I'm
• glad on it. Hood provider, is
he?”
packages.
The in q u irer was a
BINDERS and MOWERS.
--------- ------
REAPERS and I I R I L L S .=
------- =VehiclBS nf all kinds.
Corner Olive and E igh th Streets.,
THE WEST
Will Pay, through its Advertising Col
umns, a larger Dividend for the Money
Invested than can be realized from any
other source.
prohibitionist.
WHY?-------------------
Because it is read by the people with
whom you expect to do business. Can
you expect them to trade at your store
unless you inyite them to do so?
h ealth , han d lin g beer every day, going
in and out of saloons, and yet never
drin k in g the beverage. H e desired to
m ake th e acquaintance of this man.
“ This g en tlem an .” said th e prohibi
AN ADVERTISEMENT
tio n ist to th e driver, “ says you never
d rin k beer. Is that so?”
“ Yes, th a t's so; not a drop of beer for
A long pause.
OREGON.
EUGENE,
Here was th e man he had been looking
for—a perfect specimen of physical
m e.”
__________________________
—
Is a standing invitation. D oyouwant
“ I always take
w b isk y .”
“ Y es.”
“ W illin’ you should have plenty of
A Source of Profit.
dry wood, and have two kerosene lamps
goin* nt oneo?”
“ Are you ever troubled with klepto
• • l en. • •
m aniacs?” asked the reporter of the
“ W all, he m ust he p a rty fair.
Does
■ retail m erchant.
he ‘low you to run in d eb t when you
“ N ever.”
w ant to ? ”
“ Don’t any of them ever come into
“ 1 h a v en 't wanted to y e t.”
your place?” asked the reporter in sur-
“ Sliool. \ on have changed since we
1 prise.
gut d ivorced; veil alius w anted to be a
, . , .
,
....
, “ Sure. Plenty of them . But they
itin n in in debt, you know. th a t and
. . . .
never trouble m e.”
your b ein ’ so m ighty independent
“ Don't they take th in g s?”
brought on most of our q u a rre ls.”
“ Yes, hut th a t is no trouble.”
“ Il 1 wunted to run in debt I never got
"N o trouble? W hat do you mean?” I
th e cliunee,” she vn itly replied.
“ I mean w hat I say. We always
“ T h a r’ w ant no need to. 1 w asagood
, catch them at it ami simply charge them '
provider, as everybody know s.”
four prices for what thev take,
“ Yes, I had one ¡»air of slaws in three
See?
y e a rs !
T H E P E O P L E ’S T R A D E ?
ID. LUsTKT & SO3NT,
C IV E
THE
BEST
B A R G A IN S
IN
and CARPET'
IN TH E CITY O F
EUGENE.
UNDERTAKING and E M B A L M IN G a Special!
All orders for Furniture sent us from the Siuslaw will be shipped from I ortlmal
ß H A M B E R L IN ,
/
“ Now . Mary!”
“ And I d o n ’t believe in a wife creep-
A Misunderstanding.
— -----
ing ami craw ling to a husband. ”
Suspicious Wife—I heard you tell Pod-
“ Thai ’ you go sam e sars as you used kins th at you were going to spend 1100
to give m e !”
to get a seam worked.
“ If vou d o n ’t like it vou n eed n ’t stay hussv th a t—
W ATCHES, * CLOCKS
R E P A IR E D P R O M P T L Y -------------------- -----------
—
—----- A N D W O R K WARRANT*0,
Where is the
here."
j speculative Husband—Only a coal
“ And stay here. I w o n t,” lie exclaim ed ! seam, mv dear.
A N D * JEWELR’
AT
Ï «
I ) I V W." T
t »
FL O U K X C F
V A R IE T Y
S T O R •»